Anzac Cup 2019 Show

[radu]

[Pink.]

[So much pink.]

[While the colour is initially alarming, there is a certain sense of calm that comes with it.  Not as fiery or passionate as red, or as uncomfortably bland as white, an almost welcoming medium.  The glossy sheen also suggests chemical additives that might be carcinogenic, but doesn't it also relate a sense of the new?  That light glistening off the surface just means its pristine - unsoiled by other hands.  You know where its been.  No tricks.  No filth.  No sudden eruption of oozing pours that comes with trusting it.  No, this is sanitized.  This is inviting.  Any chemicals that are swimming around under the surface are only waiting to pounce on germs.  Quickly dismissing your concerns, your fears, you realize that this organic pink that covers the television monitor is as close as you'll ever get to clean.]

[...even if your minds are in the gutter.]

[Clean.]

[It might burn, but its a good burn...]

"...In trying to protect Brown from looking like the paper champ we all know him to be... Soutter got to save the fed's reputation by pissing away his own chances of winning the cup.  I say that like Paul was giving up much, but it was as big a joke as Lynn Brewster's cavernous vagina - sure you can put some clowns in there, but I don't like clowns.  Even if Soutter had volunteered to drag that halfwit with the belt through a few more painful rounds, all his continued participation would have meant, was Hell's Bouncer promos that continue to make SWAT the laughing stock of the XHF, and meeting us in the finals, where a certain irate robot would force feed them scrap metal.  That goes down about as well as their team taking a spot away from a DESERVING team.  On the bright side, putting HB in a bullshit tag team got him out of defending the belt on two shows.  The sitting duck continues to quack."

[Even that coarse Eastern European voiceover can't stop you from getting lost in the calming effect of sea of pink slime.]

"Of course... in not seeing if you had what it took to stand up to Tarrasque, you put Frostbite straight into the semi-finals.  He has been awfully quiet.  Without ninety minute documentaries of his wife telling him to win gold to cure her cancer, while a dubbed voice over mentions the name of the federation he's plugging, he doesn't seem to have a lot to say.  The fact that he's been allowed to return, let alone been put so close to winning this championship, much like having Henry Brown hold a title, really showing the piss poor state that Brewster left this hovel in..."

[The pink is almost hypnotic.]

"As bad as Frostbite being given this opportunity, is Joey Morelli actually being considered a serious threat.  Anything to make Pesci seem relevant.  Even if Timeless is single handedly carrying Chianti, we all know its Roxy that keeps them afloat.  To be honest, I really thought management was pushing for a showdown between Bar Code and Bro Code... everything seemed to point in that direction.  They had already made up their minds long before the matches started, and through some questionable draws all but guaranteed we'd see those two holding the trophy up in the air... and that's where we were going to come in."

[The perfect pink image seems to have a smudge in it, something kind of grey, but out of focus?  Its not noticeable at first, but soon takes up a third of the screen.]

[The camera starts to pan out to reveal that pink had been a jar of ointment....]

[...And the grey smudge soon turns into a follicle, which is attached to something black.  The black thing ends up being a twitching leg...]

[Kicking...]

[Thrusting...]

[Twitching away...]



[The thousand receptacles in its eyes darting around in alien horror as it falls back into glorious pink.]

[The fight doesn't matter.  Drown, don't drown.  Live or die.  Even if the team doesn't last a night, its still in there, sullying it.  Soiling it.  Ruining it for any who might be tempted to try it.]

"WE represented an element that was sadly missing from the tournament.  My partner represents a credibility - a reminder of SWAT's GOOD OLD DAYS - which is a torch that Team Fairtex apparently weren't holding.  While on the subject of those jokes - that's one less round than last year.  Next time around you can get kicked out in the first round and save your wives the indignity of being paid to go out on their backs.  There is always next time, Team of the Distant probably alternate Future.  The former Anzac champions were suppose to be the real deal... but they turned out to be broken shells of the men that got lucky two years ago.  Without even averages on their side, they were crushed and discarded.  With how easily they were dispatched, you might question the cup, and what it represented in past years.  Well my partner is a legit SWAT star... so he brings that lustre like only a tin man could.  If you somehow were to get past him, then you've proved yourself... you aren't going to... in bring him in I have essentially purchased the cup... but if you did pull it off, that would be a pretty massive feather.  Possibly ostrich..."

[No longer moving, the insect starts to ooze pus as the chemical agents of this cream start to do their magic.]

"ME?  ...I am an entirely different beast."

[It starts to dissolve, but even as the filthy terror disappears, the ointment no longer holds the same sway.]

"See I was positive that management was vigorously self pleasuring themselves with thoughts of BroCode and BarCode getting to the finals.  ...But if Chianti had beaten BarCode... as they did... it wouldn't matter, because all six of them are basically the same person.  Cool heels.  Long in the tooth, snide, condescending, not taking anyone seriously, just swinging dicks on a mission to show everyone their assholes that don't care, but they secretly want you to like them.  I like you... do you like me?

My partner claims to be a wrestling robot... but I'm the unique entity in this tournament.  

A heel.  

An honest to goodness bad guy.

Until I unify the Amazon and heavyweight titles, there is NOTHING flashy about me.

I hurt people.  Specifically you.  

...And there will be nothing stylish about the way I rearrange your faces.  The audience might even start cheering you punks on... that is what makes me a villain, and you all dated since the mid-90s.  So congratulations on outliving the various Codes, Chianti... drink it up!  ...but if either of you, Turner, Morelli, are starting to feel fatigued, feel free to sub out to Steele, Blair, Calum or Maddox... because the six of you are interchangeable in my book.  The only names I'll remember at the end of the night are the ones I beat... and that is only to inform the department of health about potential HPV infections...

Nothing to see here but results.

See... for the purposes of illustrating a point, I've let my little friend here drown in some medicine... but it could have just as easily been a bottle of Chianti.

Named after an Italian Red... a table wine if ever there was one... cheap... bulk... you could even get Roxy drunk off of it.... you know a year from now when she weighs 400 pounds.  Looked into that future yet, Timeless?  Quantity over quality.  You have the entourage that is so lame you hope its cool... all the powers of an indy time travelling gimmick and more mob stereotypes that you can shake a stick at.  Much like the larger scheme of Code domination that Risky Business threw a monkey wrench into, that scheme was missing something... so are you.  Deep down.  There is an ugliness in your cores.

You are truly revolting people... which I would admire... but that's my job.

You took my job.

...and in a few minutes, lets see if you enjoy THAT job.

It must have seemed like you'd finally hitched yourself to a winner, huh, Turner?  I see a lot of red wine in your future.

[One of The Dixie Beast's grubby fingers looms into frame touching the edge of the pink jar, then circling the rim.]

[The best laid plans...]

[So perfect, so clean, so pink...]

[...But there is something rotten in there.]



 

[Timeless]

[We switch to the ring, and we see stage hands setting up a couch and a some coffee tables, they decorate the tables and as they do, we see on the tron, The Ellen set. The settings in the ring seem to match the Ellen set on the screen, and it looks like we are getting set for a live cross.

Timeless and Roxylishus make their way back to the ring and inspect the settings, as on the Tron, Ellen introduces Maren Morris and she comes out and sings The Middle. ]

Ellen : (sitting down from doing her stupid dancing) That was Maren Morris! Great song and thanks for joining us Maren. Now, we have a first, we are crossing live to SWAT Wrestling, they are in the middle of a big tournament, and we are joining them with an interview with two of their top stars, Timeless Alex Turner and Roxylishus. (Screens at home show half Ellen show and half the ring, Roxylishus and Timeless sitting comfy of the couch, looking a million dollars. Roxylishus has a low cut top on which is bulging with them fantastic titties, and Timeless, if possible looks even better, silk Armani purple shirt unbuttoned, and his Greek god like body glistening with baby oil.)

Timeless : Thanks Allen, and I would gladly meet Maren in the middle. The middle of HER LEGS!!!

Ellen : Oh my, I don’t think you can say that.

Timeless : Come on Dude. This is wrestling, we can say whatever we like!

Ellen : (trying to be professional and change the subject) Ok, so tell us about this tournament you guys have going down there at SWAT?

Timeless : It’s a tag team tournament, for the Anzac Cup. This is our 3rd Annual one, first year, i let this vixen talk me into teaming with my life long nemisis Daniel Collins, then we left him high and dry in it. Last year, we teamed with Christian Sebastian Kennedy, got to the final and he dropped the ball.

Roxylishus : THIS year, we are with Joey Morelli! The Godson of SWAT! So far we have disposed of the She Devils and Bar Code. (Roxylishus chuckles) Next stop, Risky Business.

Ellen : Risky Business? Sounds like this is BIG business, if you pardon the pun.

Timeless : You know it Dude. Our esteemed owner Mr Joe Pesci put us together, and at first, we were a little sceptical, but then i got a call from the future, and well, it’s safe to say, we are destined for great things, this tourney is just the beginning Al.

Ellen : The future? (bemused at being called Al, and shaking it off as a stumble)

Roxylishus : Oh yeah bro. He is the master of Time and Space. We have had many adventures.

Ellen : Fascinating. Tell us Roxylishus, we all saw you on Married at First Site marry Mr Lishus, wow, what a sensatation that was, how is life since then, and how is Mr Lishus.

Roxylishus : Well, life has been great since then Allan. I have more instagram followers than I can count, offers from every second reality show to come on the block, girl bands blowing up my phone and not to mention we are tearing it up at SWAT!

As for my former husband, he has returned to his 3rd world country in shame. We served the 3 months of marriage to make my last name official under SWAT rules. He didn’t understand it was just for entertainment and tv, not real and he became obsessed with me, i mean, who could blame him, but it came down to he had to leave or he was going to get killed by my true love here. (rests her chin lovingly on Timeless’ shoulder.)

Ellen : Here is a question that I often wonder, you seem to be a man of time, and of nostalgia, Backstreet Boys or Five?

Timeless : Really Allen? Easy. Duran Duran. Every time.

Ellen : Its Ellen, not Allen.

Timeless : (spitting his water out of his mouth.) Ellen? No shit dude?

Roxylishus : You’re, a .... a .... a women?

Ellen : (quite embarrassed) Oh boy, this is a little humiliating, yes i am women! ALL Woman!

Timeless : All woman? (Timeless laughs) THIS IS ALL WOMAN!

Roxylishus : (standing up and doing a pose, the push your chest out as far as you possibly can pose.) Wow, sorry dude .. i mean, Ma’am.

Ellen : It’s ok. (wondering how to dig herself out of this) Let’s go to them girl bands, we heard the rumours, that Gerri from the Spice Girls wants you to replace Victoria, is this the case?

Roxylishus : Yeah, i mean, ugh, what are them dinosaurs, like in their forties? What a bunch of “Wannabe’s” ... “Whoooooo, do they think they are”

Ellen : Victoria is a personal fr ...

Timeless : Can it Man! No way you ain’t no dude! We couldn’t care less about them old scrubs! This is 2019! This is the Time of Timeless!

Ellen : I assure you, I am all woman, my wife can testify to THAT! (a photo comes up of Ellen and Portia)

Timeless : You’re wife? Oh man. This is too much. What is this show we are appearing on? Look bro, let me give you a heads up, when you’re interviewing, it’s not about YOU! It’s about the guest, so less time on you and your personal life “choices” and more time on you know ... US!!

Roxylishus : This is what i don’t get, i mean, look at your wife, she is smoking hot, then look at you, you look like a man, thus our “mix up”. What I don’t understand, is if she likes girls, why would she go for one that looks like A MAN?!

Ellen : It’s not all looks in love young girl, you will learn that as you age and them bazooka’s give way.

Timeless : We are AGELESS Allen!

Roxylishus : These “bazooka’s” came with a lifetime guarantee I will have you know.

Ellen : I think I am going to cut this interview off here, you two I must say are the rudest and crudest guests I have ever had, and too come on here and disrespect me the way you have, I won’t stand for it.

[The SWAT Tron cuts of, and Ellens producers have cut off the simulcast.]

Timeless : (standing up) Wow, I guess she told us.

Roxylishus : Pfft. SWAT > Allen.

Timeless : Look at all you sheep fuckers ... sitting there not knowing how to react to what just happened ... ohhh, they insulted that poor dude looking lady. Take note! This is OUR show. I am the Pinncale, Timeless Alex Turner! I am the Pulse of SWAT!

The divorcee’s and single mum’s watching that trash just got their month’s worth of jollies drooling and dripping over us!

Roxylishus : We offend who we like, when we like. We just destroyed the BarCode, and The She Devils. That slimey Calum, he put his hands on me, and he paid the price. Mr Steele, I will see you afterwards, I owe you “one”.

Timeless : Next up, Risky Business. Industrial Man, you should have stayed gone. Replays of Hell’s Bouncer promo’s on loop will seem like Utopia compared to what we have in store for you. As for that grub partner of yours, Radu Matei, bring all the worms and slime you like, that shit don’t frighten us!

Roxylishus : (singing) Nobody likes me, everybody hates me, think i’ll eat some worms. (she picks up her phone which was vibrating and reads the text, she grins fiendishly then shows it too Timeless) Look at who wants to come to our party.

[Grabs the phone from Roxylishus and types, the camera sneaks over the top to see his reply. It reads simply, AFFIRMATIVE

Timeless : Industrial Man, what a hoot. “This station is not operational!”

Ohh, this is going to be too easy. Just like you were Maddox and Calum! How’s Maddox, i give him a big lecture on how he is the top of the bottom and bottom of the top, and his reply, says the same back to me, boy, that’s the equivalent of the school yard “you are”.

Roxylishus : And Calum kissing me with the lights out, if only he knew where these lips were just before we “CAME” out to the ring.

Timeless : How do I taste sissy boy?

We are CHIANTI!

We like to Root and make all the Loot!

We take out the Trash, and collect all the Cash!

We break your heart and tear you apart!

We make Stacks and break Backs!

[Timeless saunters around the ring, owning every inch of it]

I am the Ultimate Male Supreme!

Every breathing Woman’s Wet Dream!

A God Damn Wrestling Machine!

[Unfadabe.]

[SWAT Team]

"Hello, I'm Mr. Ed Dubin.. 

A horse is a horse, of course, of course, 
And no one can talk to a horse of course 
That is, of course, unless the horse is the famous Mr. Ed Dubin.. 

Go right to the source and ask the horse 
He'll give you the answer that you'll endorse. 
He's always on a steady course. 
Talk to Mr. Ed Dubin  

Closing Theme:

A horse is a horse, of course, of course, 
And no one can talk to a horse of course 
That is, of course, unless the horse is the famous Mr. Ed Dubin.. 

Go right to the source and ask the horse 
He'll give you the answer that you'll endorse. 
He's always on a steady course. 
Talk to Mr. Ed Dubin.. 

People yakkity yak a streak and waste your time of day 
But Mister Ed Dubin will never speak unless he has something to say. 

A horse is a horse, of course, of course, 
And this one'll talk 'til his voice is hoarse. 
You never heard of a talking horse? 

Well listen to this. 

Dubin is Misssster Ed."- Mr. Ed Dubin Theme Song


Narrator: That Ed..what a character he is, eh? For those of you who have no clue what I'm talking about..don't worry about it, it's above your pay grade. As Narrator for the Morelli's, hired by Mr. Pesci himself..I'm not afraid to expose anybody. Joey may be to much of a stand-up guy to tell it like it should be told, but you can bet your ass those rules don't apply to me. I can say what I want..mainly so these cats runnin' around here don't think they can get one over on Chianti..sorry that's just not the way the cannoli is filled. Not sorry, as Joey would say.


Let me update you third-world living..spider hole sleeping..rock crawling under, freakazoids to a dose of reality, and not fiction like you saw in my client's next opponent Radu's run-of-the-mill, uninspired, unimaginative promo. Yeah..we got "Timeless" as a partner..who you got you pretend middle eastern piece of shit? "Lifeless", that's who! A fucking robot? We'll get into that a little later. 


Not so spoiler alert: Chianti has wrecked through the She-Devils in the first round and #Barcode in the second round to advance to the semi-finals for the Anzac Cup 2019 Tag Team Tournament. With a little help? Why the fuck not? A win is a win in this business, and at the end of the day as long as that check clears that has Pesci's signature on it..we are gold. Fuck the critics..everybody and their robots are a critic these days.


Which brings me to my clients' next opponent..Radu and his wind up coadjutor, The Industrial Man. Risky Business? I get IM has become nothing more than a rent-a-whore much like Lana (Rebecca De Mornay) since he fell off the face of the earth and left Syndicate Wrestling And Tradition, but no way in hell can Radu pull off the part of young Joel Goodsen (Tom Cruise). Not even if you gave him the silly Mo from the Three Stooges bowl hair cut. The only thing Radu gets mistaken for these days is the owner of a 7-11. Or maybe the taxi cab driver that brings you to work in the city everyday. Hey, Radu..we are out of Big Gulps my man. Stay in your lane. Pro Wrestling was a valiant effort but it just didn't work out for you now that you decided to jump on Chianti. Consider my client, Joey Morelli and his partner Alex Turner a fly swatter. We don't even have to call an exterminator that's how easy you have made this semi-final round of promos. You can focus on running a gas station or whatever the fuck your kind do. Radu..Mr. Genie in the lamp..No wheezing the juice!!


Verbal-onslaughts are NOT really part of my job description but fuck it. A robot and Caucasian pretending to be a middle eastern prick..That's what SWAT has become? What did my clients sign up for? Yeah..fuck that shit. Not while my fat ass is here eating sausage and peppers with a side veal cutlet. I'll have more for those bug-fuckers later on.


I'll set the stage for you. Joey is back at the building shit in his backyard again, since the time machine worked so well. He is wearing a Nike jumpsuit and a pair of old Nike Air Jordan's that look new he dubs his "work shoes". He is tinkering with what some sort of gismo. A fly (no doubt the same from the poorly performed Radu promo) lands on the doo-hickey. Just before Joey goes to crush the fly with his bare hands, Twin #2 SWATS the fly with a flyswatter sending the Diptera staggering to it's death.


Twin #2: I got him, Dad!


Joey Morelli: Very good, son. See how EASY it was to get rid of such a pesky insect?


Twin #2: It sure was, Dad. 


Joey Morelli: Though I'm not sure how many people are really scared of insects any way. Especially flies.


Narrator: Nobody is..they are just annoying as fuck. Kinda' like Radu and his clumsy side piece.


Twin #2: What is this we are building, Dad?


Joey Morelli: A robot, son. For work.


Twin #2: Wow! First a time machine and now a robot? You must have the coolest job in the world!


Narrator: A time machine before- a robot now..what's next? Frosty the Fuckin' Snowman! Forget I asked..Joey might take that idea and run with it like Charlie Feigel does every time somebody comes up with something for him to steal.


Joey Morelli: Yeah..I guess it is. I never really looked at it in that way, but you're right. My job is kinda' cool isn't it?


Candice Morelli: It sure is..


[Candice Morelli races out to the backyard almost startlingly Joey. She comes over to Joey and gives him a big kiss and a smile.]


Joey Morelli: Hey there, Babe. I was just working on this project for work.


[Candice goes over to the thingamajig and begins to pull the tarp off of the top half.]


Candice Morelli: What is this anyway?


Joey Morelli: A robot!


Narrator: Joey says proudly as the robot is revealed. The robot looks like a robot version of Roxylishus..complete with big huge ass tits!


Candice Morelli: Wow! Anatomically correct to I see?


Joey Morelli: You noticed that! You think Industrial Man will like it?


"Yes, Joey. I think everybody can see the big tits and extra wide "box" downstairs. This is no doubt a mock up of Roxylishus.", Candice thinks to herself out loud.


Candice Morelli: Sure, babe..but why are you making a robot for your opponent for Round #3 at the Anzac Cup 2019 Tag Team Tournament?


Joey Morelli: I figure he must be lonely. If I can get this puppy to work he can have someone to share his life with like I do you and Alex Turner does with Roxy. 


Candice Morelli: Ah..babe? He's a robot. I'm not sure he feels much of anything.


Joey Morelli: There had to be some reason he left Syndicate Wrestling And Tradition high and dry. Why else would he leave when he was the SWAT International World Heavyweight Champion?


Narrator: Maybe because he wasn't into paulatics and watching people like Ed Dubin suck up to TAINT every belt on the roster.


Candice Morelli: I don't know, Babe. But I do know you got this little helper of yours up pretty late on a school night.


Twin #2: Oh, mom..


Joey Morelli: No, "oh moms". She's right. It's way past your bedtime Twin #1.


Candice Morelli: Babe? That's Twin #2!


"Crap! I always mess that up. I can barely tell them apart.", Joey thinks to himself.


Narrator: Tell me about it..


Joey Morelli: I know that! Just making sure everybody is paying attention.


Twin #2: But, Dad..do I have to go to bed already? I want to finish the robot with you.


Joey Morelli: No buts..Do what your mom says, son. Besides I'm done working on her for the night. I can just imagine Industrial Man and his new friend dancing around like its prom night in New Zealand.

Twin #2: Okay, Dad. Just don't finish it without me.


Joey Morelli: I won't..I promise. Now go get your pajamas on and mom, and I will be right in to tuck you and your brother into bed.


Twin #2: Good night, Dad.


Joey Morelli: Good night, son!


[Twin #2 goes back in the house and goes upstairs exiting the cameras view.]


Candice Morelli: Do you think it's okay the boys spend so much time doing these projects?


Joey Morelli: Yeah..at least they aren't getting into trouble or laying around playing PlayStation like most of their friends.


Candice Morelli: True. Let's go inside and tuck the boys in. I bet one of them forgot to brush their teeth.


Joey Morelli: Or try and pull the rinse the toothbrush under the faucet trick.


[They both laugh and wrap arms around each other's waist then head towards the house.]


Candice Morelli: Oh, yeah. What'd you name "her" anyways?


Joey Morelli: Her?


Candice Morelli: The robot.


Joey Morelli: Oh her. Robotlishus.


Candice Morelli: Of course you did.


[They laugh in unison as the camera fades to first the ending narration from Narrator, followed by a song and Joey Morelli logo with his famous saying on it.]


Narrator: That was heart warming wasn't it? These Morelli's get me at the heart strings every time. Gets you right in the feels..doesn't it?


Then you got Radu, the Caucasian middle eastern. Hey Radu..Osama Bin Laden called..dude wants his name back. Oh and his dialysis machine. You are going to need it after Chianti gets through with you. Since you are clearly only a white dude playing a middle eastern bug lover, this next part won't bother you a bit. Good thing. I don't give a shit if it does bother you.


How do you say "Alice in Wonderland" in Arabic? 


Fatima in the house!


What do you call two Arabs in front of a trash can?


A family portrait.


What do you call two Arab men and two Arab women in front of a trash can?


A night-club.


How long does it take for Arabic women to take out the trash?


Nine months.


An American man, a French guy, and an Arab are all on a plane. Suddenly the pilot comes over the PA and says the plane is going to crash if they don't get rid of some unnecessary weight. The American takes a huge bag of hamburgers out of his suitcase and tosses it out the window, saying "Not a problem, I've got plenty of these where I come from." The Arab guy somehow produces an entire barrel of oil and tosses it out, saying "Not a problem, I got plenty of this where I come from." The French guy thinks things over for a minute, then grabs the Arab and throws him out the window.


What's the difference between a run-over dog and a run-over Arab?


There's usually skid marks in front of the dog.


What's the difference between E.T and an arab?


ET eventually went home.


Arab problem #166


Mohammad is here to pick you up.


Which Mohammed?


Reporter: Excuse me, may I interview you?
 
Man: Yes!


Reporter: Name?


Man: Abdul Al-Rhazim.


Reporter: Sex? 


Man: Three to five times a week. 


Reporter: No..no! I mean male or female?


Man: Yes, male, female... sometimes camel.


Reporter: Holy cow! 


Man: Yes, cow, sheep... animals in general.

Reporter: But isn't that hostile?

Man: Yes, horse style, dog style, any style.


Reporter: Oh dear! 


Man: No, no deer. Deer run too fast. Hard to catch.


Damn...owned by the Narrator. Ain't that a mother fucker?


Chianti is the shit, on point, and always lit!


And Roxylishus still has humongous tits!

[SWAT Team]

Frank Salazar : Introducing coming in at a combined weight of 497 lbs .... accompanied by Candice Morelli and Roxylishus!!!!& TIMELESS ALEX TURNER ..... THE GODSON OF SWAT JOEY MORELLI....CHIANTI!!!!

[Sfera Ebbasta - Tran Tran hits and Candice and Roxylishus make their way out to the rampway, they look so hot you wish you had two eyes so you could look at both, make that four eyes you want, and a tub of baby oil. They pose together and the fans go wild, then Joey and Timeless come out between them, high five and the four make their way to the ring, Roxylishus stops to banter with a fan, then mock wretches with her finger in her mouth gagging and dismisses them. The girls hold the ropes open for Timeless and Joey and Timeless grabs the mic from Frank.]

Timeless : I got passion in my pants and I ain't afraid to show it!

Joey : (grabbing the mic) I’m Sexy and I know it!

[Timeless tells him, no, he is, and they bicker at who is the sexiest as they await Risky Business.]

Frank Salazar : And introducing their opponents ... coming in at a combined weight of 479 lbs .... RADU MATIE!!!! (the crowd boo’s) and .... THE INDUSTRIAL MAN!!!! ATILLA BALAN!!!! (Crowd goes wild) RISKY BUSINESS!!!!

[The house lights fade, leaving the arena in darkness.]

[Riz Ortolani's haunting theme music to the film Cannibal Holocaust begins to play over the PA system.]

[Purple spotlights search through the crowd, building a sense of dread. The audience boo for the next participant, because he repulses them, but more so they aren't left alone with their thoughts. The erratic movement of the lights start to circle closer together before eventually, the perfect circles of light connect into the body of a large centipede. The visual representation of the insect stalks over the crowd, before racing towards the entranceway. Hitting the black curtains, the purple lights seem to double up, and fold into themselves.]

[Rough hands swatting aside the curtain, the five-time SWAT Dixieland champion pushes his way out into the arena. Its been a while since he had an audience like this. Rather than appreciate the change in pace, he seems to shake with rage, channeling it down towards the ring. Clenching his fists, Radu Matei starts to stalk down the aisle in sync with the music. The audience throws stuff, and generally let him know that his presence isn't appreciated... but they also keep their distance. Anyone who leans over the railing gets slashed by the box cutters he hides in his suit. Some are still stupid enough to see blood, but the majority vocalize their hatred out of arms' reach. Cowards that they are.]

[Approaching ringside, Radu lifts under the curtain to pull out a large box. Patting it, he smiles, before turning his venom back to the ring.]

[The house lights cut out leaving the arena in darkness as "Strict Machine" by Goldfrapp starts to pump over the PA System. Yellow sparks blast down on the entranceway giving the audience of a flash of Attila Balan. As the embers burn out all that remains is the audiences approval and the hundred tiny glowing lights attached to the Industrial Man's leather jacket. These lights reflect in his ray ban shades giving him an otherworldly appearance in the dark. Balan marches down the aisle at a methodical pace, in sync with the music. Entering the ring, Industrial Man throws off his jacket for another round of yellow pyro, before the lights come back on.]

Jeremy Tucker : Getting to the money end now folks, what a match we have here, Risky Business Vs Chianti!

Andrew Fulton : This is a Main Event anywhere in the World.

Jeremy Tucker : Ref calls for the belt and IMan and Joey start things off. Joey bounces around and shadow boxes in front of him, Balan watching closely, and Joey turns around and blasts Radu on the outside. IMan pounces and grabs Joey in a waist lock, and Radu runs into the ring, fuming, the ref stands in front of him and sends him back to his corner, and Timeless blasts Balan with a double ax handle, and then Joey DDT’s him.

Andrew Fulton : Joey mocks Radu and Radu calms himself and no sells it now. He is too smart for these Chianti games.

Jeremy Tucker : Timeless tagged in by Joey, Timeless hits a drop kick, what a thing of beauty.

Andrew Fulton : Best drop kick in the game!

Jeremy Tucker : Snap suplex from Timeless to Industrial Man, then he goes for an inverted atomic drop, but Balan no sells it.

Andrew Fulton : The robot has no balls Jerry!

Jeremy Tucker : Vicious lariat by Balan twirls Timeless over in a 360, and Balan then hits a snap mare into a knee lift, tags in Radu and holds Timeless in place.

Andrew Fulton : Radu bites Timeless on the bicep. He is feasting on him, the ref making the count and Radu releases at 4.

Jeremy Tucker : Roxylishus is beside herself with Timeless getting bitten.

Andrew Fulton : That’s her job!

Jeremy Tucker : Radu with a side Russian leg sweep, rolls over with it and drops the leg on Timeless, then tags Balan back in.

Andrew Fulton : Balan with a hard right hand, and then a diving fist drop.

Jeremy Tucker : Tornado DDT by Balan and he covers.

One ...........

Two ... Joey breaks the count with a hard elbow to the back of the neck of Balan.

Andrew Fulton : Joey then delivers a swinging neck breaker.

Jeremy Tucker : Timeless back to his feet, nails an exploder suplex, and then tags Joey back in.

Andrew Fulton : Chianti tagging in and out real well. They are a well oiled machine! Industrial Man on the other hand, he is a poorly oiled machine.

Jeremy Tucker : So bad Fulton. Joey with a belly to belly suplex.

Andrew Fulton : So, what’s the go with Balan anyway, is he like a Robo Cop or something? Or a C3PO?

Jeremy Tucker : We’ve only been calling his matches for almost two years now Fulton. Joey with a Guillotine choke.

Andrew Fulton : Radu runs the apron and clobbers Joey with a big clothesline. This man is my new favourite here in SWAT Jerry.

Jeremy Tucker : Radu is a disgusting man, i am ashamed the likes of him wrestle for us.

Andrew Fulton : Nothing would make him happier than to cause you that shame.

Jeremy Tucker : Balan with a fireman’s carry brain buster on Joey, then tags in Radu.

Andrew Fulton : Radu stomps away on Joey.

Jeremy Tucker : Spinning drop toe hold from Radu.

Andrew Fulton : Candace jumps up on the apron to distract Radu, and he grabs her by the hair, and starts biting her ear!

Jeremy Tucker : Oh my GOD! Radu is going too far!

Andrew Fulton : He is going full Mike Tyson on her! I always heard the ear was a sensitive spot and girls go wild when you nibble on them.

Jeremy Tucker : NIBBLE! He is biting on it like a savage!

Andrew Fulton : Joey with a high knee to the back, and Radu crumbles.

Jeremy Tucker : Joey is incensed, he is stomping on Radu and the ref is calling for a rope break, but Joey is ignoring him. He is yelling at Candace asking if she is ok inbetween the stomps, he has lost it!

Andrew Fulton : The ref is now physically trying to pull Joey off of Radu and the ropes, and he just automatically drops him with a Joe KO!!! (RKO)

Jeremy Tucker : Joey just Joe KO’d the REF!

Andrew Fulton : Balan runs in and Fluid motion kneebreaker into T-Bone Suplex on Joey.

Jeremy Tucker : Parallel Computing! Balan then lifts Joey up into a gorilla press, he is going for the Industrial Pollution but Timeless takes him out at the knee’s!

Andrew Fulton : Timeless grabs Balan ... FALCON ARROW!!!

Jeremy Tucker : Timeless then locks the rings of Saturn on Balan!

Andrew Fulton : TURNABOUT!!!

Jeremy Tucker : There is no ref to check on Balan!

Andrew Fulton : And they are not the legal men!

Jeremy Tucker : Radu using the ropes for leverage to help him up and mule kicks Timeless.

Andrew Fulton : Wheelbarrow piledriver by Radu to Timeless.

Jeremy Tucker : Balan picks up Timeless for a piledriver and Radu climbs to the top rope, they are going for the Spike Piledriver, Roxylishus slides into the ring and she has a big bucket in her hands and pours the water out all over Balan!

Andrew Fulton : Roxylishus has soaked the Industrial Man and he swivels to her.

Jeremy Tucker : Industrial Man releases Timeless and starts to slowly stalk Roxy.

Andrew Fulton : Run Roxy!!!! RUN!!!

Jeremy Tucker : She was trying to fry his electrics with the water, or rust him up or something, but it didn’t work, and Balan is advancing towards her, she slides out of the ring and he follows her. She tries to stop his advances, using her charms.

Andrew Fulton : She is a Siren!!! They aren’t working though, and Balan keeps advancing ... Timeless launches himself over the top rope and flying bulldogs Balan!

Jeremy Tucker : Radu climbs down from the ropes and starts looking under the ring for his own goodies.

Andrew Fulton : Yes! Radu has his box and slides into the ring, and whats this? Lynn Brewster has ran out and is blocking him. These two are developing quite the animosity.

Jeremy Tucker : Radu tells her to move or she’ll wear it again, not Joey. Lynn smiles at him and then removes her top.

Andrew Fulton : Wooo hooo. Things are picking up here.

Jeremy Tucker : You perv! SHE IS WEARING A REFEREE SHIRT!

Andrew Fulton : Radu is livid ... he glares at her, just that momentary distraction ...

Jeremy Tucker : JOE KO!!!!

Andrew Fulton : Joey just nailed Radu with the JOE KO!!!

Jeremy Tucker : Cover ..... Brewster drops for the count ... 1 ... 2 ... 3!!!!!!

Andrew Fulton : That was a very fast count ... is she even a referee?

Jeremy Tucker : She is the GM! She can do what she likes.

Andrew Fulton : CHIANTI ADVANCE!!! Risky Business is officially OUT OF BUSINESS!!

[The girls grab Joey and Timeless and support them up the rampway as Sfera Ebbasta - Tran Tran hits, Brewster high tails it thru the crowd, Radu coming too with the Industrial Mans aid to glare at her as she disappears thru the masses.]

Frank Salazar : Winners of the match and advancing to the final .... CHIANTI!!!!!!

[alexwithers]

Alex Withers: Syndicate Wrestling and Tradition… are you starting to believe now? Are you starting to understand just what you have in your midst. Are you starting to understand just how special this moment is. For years this company has cried for talent, for years this company has cried out for superstardom, for three years the Anzac Cup has waited for wrestling icons to grace its doors and now, finally… finally you have the saviours of SWAT, Leon Washington and Alex Withers. Two men that are not just the best in this tournament, but two men that are the best in the business, two men that came from Xtreme Hardcore Wrestling and showed the entire world what a real professional wrestling star looks like… And two matches in and we’re not slowing down, two matches in and we’re barely warmed up. So imagine what we’re going to do as we get closer to the end.

The camera was in the dressing room of Alex Withers, he glanced at the television and watched highlights of his opponents match in the first round. Dressed in a pair of track pants and a XHWARENA.PROBOARDS.COM promotional hoody he smirked towards the camera as he brushed his hair back from his face

Alex Withers: So what is it that this rag tag tournament is going to throw at us next… Frostbite and Tarrasque. You know something this would be a complete waste of my time if it wasn’t for the need I have within me to win everything I ever get involved in. My agent sold this tournament to me as a way of gaining more fame in the Southern Hemisphere… but really if this is the best they have got, if this is the best that they can acquire, if this is the best that they can attract then fuck me SWAT is in real trouble. But you know what I am a man of my word, I came here to win…. And in no time at all Leon Washington and I will be able to sell the tin pot cup for a dime or two, but more importantly we’ll leave the rest of the wrestling world in no doubt who are the best in the business. But hey, maybe Frostbite and Tarrasque can stop us right? Wrong…

Withers laughed to himself scoffing at the very thought

Alex Withers: I mean come on… let’s take Tarrasque for one moment… where the fuck do I begin with this waste of oxygen, seriously he is living proof that anyone can get in to this business if you have enough body parts, he is the living embodiment of what it means to be no more developed than a fucking amoeba. I heard him right at the start of this thing talking about his first match… he sounded like Tarzan fucked a bull and it shat him out head first on to a fucking rock. Seriously, you Tarrasque or ‘Ugg’ as I am going to call him… Me, the best wrestler on the planet. This is a dude that lifts weights and thinks that, that is enough… let me tell you my friend it isn’t, not when you’re in the ring with Alex Withers, not when you’re in the ring with Leon Washington… But then you got a cool name right?

Withers exhaled deeply, mouthing the words wow

Alex Withers: So, so, so, so very fucking wrong. Seriously, I hit google and I thought I’d come up with the meaning for your name, I thought it would be Greek or something… named after the God of big balls, or the God of powerful triceps… but no. Dungeons and fucking Dragons…. Really ugg, that is what you are going with… oh sure it apparently means magical beast but when the magical beast is a fucking action figure it’s about as useful as my Texas Tornado WWF figure from back in the day. Listen Cheech, here is some words of wisdom from the best, take them, hold them, cherish them because trust me this is the closest you are getting to goldust…

Withers ushers in the camera and speaks barely above a whisper

Alex Withers: This…is…not…a game. This isn’t some game where you sit around a table or a computer and play act, this isn’t something where you roleplay… Withers stops for a moment and smirks This is a fight, this is real life, this is all that matters and believe me when I hit you you don’t lose points, you don’t lose a little character you lose your teeth and in just a few hours that is exactly what is going to happen… you ugg will be picking your teeth up off of the floor with broken fingers

Withers words were spat with a venom as his speech went on, he glared down the barrel of the camera and shook his head

Alex Withers: You got in to this game because you saw it on television once and you thought anyone could do it, you thought it would be a fun little game… I do this because I had to fight out of Detroit, I had to fight out of the world I was brought up in, I do this because when I left Detroit I swore that whatever I did I was going to be the best… and later tonight when we meet in that ring you will see that there are levels and Ugg you’re just not on mine… But hey, look to your right and who do we have, Frostbite… Jesus H Christ, did you two grow up together and play a game of who can make up the crappiest names. Did you lose a bet when you were breaking in to the business dude because seriously if I had to wrestle under the name Frostbite, I’d book myself in to a Texas Death Match and fucking kill myself. I mean look I feel sorry for you already having to hold up the ropes for Ugg but dude, do yourself a favour, go home and draw yourself up a better gimmick, I don’t know Peter the Peadophile would be more tasteful than going around calling yourself freaking Frostbite. Now I look at you and I see the brains of the outfit, but before you go jerking yourself off in the corner because you think I paid you a compliment if Ugg was tagging with a boulder, I would think the boulder would be the brains of the outfit so please don’t get it twisted.

Withers smirked as he leant back in to his recliner

Alex Withers: I want you to do me a favour, in the few minutes before our match I want you and anyone else to go to xhwarena.proboards.com I want you to head to the XHW Network and look through the archived, I want you to look at All or Nothing Battle Royal 2017… and whilst you’re at it All or Nothing Battle Royal 2018, hell whilst you’re at that I want you to look at XHW King of Trio’s 2017… I want you to look at who has had the quickest rise to fame in the biggest wrestling company on the planet and the name that will stick out time and time and time again is… you guessed it Alex Withers. You see making impacts is what I do, making a name for myself is what I do best, beating people up is what I do better than anyone else on the face of the planet. So Frosties I want you to think long and hard before you get in to the ring with me, you can come down with Ugg and get your ass handed to you or you can go full on Of Mice and Men and take old Ugg out behind the sheds and put him out of his misery. Either way, the team going through to the final will be XHW’s own Alex Withers and Leon Washington.

Withers cocked his eyebrows as he reached over for a swig of water.

Alex Withers: But hey Ugg and Frosties… believe me when I tell you my issue isn’t with your IQ levels barely being above single digits and it damn sure isn’t with your name it is with the fact that in just a few moments you will be standing in the same ring as me, it is to do with the fact that you are in my way of winning this tournament with Leon, it is because somewhere in your dumb brain you think you have a chance, you think you are going to win, you think you are going to pull of the biggest shock in the history of professional wrestling and send New Zealand in to party mode. Well you bring the party balloons Ugg, Frostbite you bring the cake and jelly, Leon will bring the strippers and I will bring the song… and the song will go something like this ‘Alex Withers is everything you will never be’. Party over bitch boys, time to Stay Down

And with that Withers thrust his knuckles towards the camera with a smirk on his face as the footage faded to black.

[frostbite]

Nothing but complete darkness for roughly a few seconds but slowly things start to come into light. We look around we very bright lights so much so that it might actually blind somebody, might need some shades. The ceiling is that of a lite blue but it has a few wet spots on it as something must have been or currently is leaking but that is for the people who own this building to discover. As the cameras zoom back we see plenty green lockers in this small place some are open and some of closed, hell some are ripped off the hinges and on the tan colored floor which in some spots are peeled back, and some are even some of tile is thrown to the side and leaning up against the wall. This place looks as though it just might come down all around you, but amongst this mess, someone is sitting in the middle of the floor and sitting on a piece of tile that isn't pulled up. A gentleman is sitting with his legs crossed or as it was said back in the day Indian style. The short blonde hair gentleman has his eyes closed as he appears to be in deep thought. The young man is shirtless but he is quite cut, he has on long blue tights and blue boots.

Crowd... YEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

Frostbite is just sitting there not moving an inch as he takes a deep breath.

Frostbite.. Ah, I never thought this meditation thing would really work. It was not who I was for many years, but I got to say I got of like it now. It helps you relax and focus on the next task at hand. My partner and I were lucky I must admit we were able to take a little time off and next out the second round of this tournament and have time to gather our thoughts and prepare for what lies ahead.

Frostbite opens his eyes as he turns his toward the camera with an intense look.

Frostbite.. Well Pecci, and I know you are listening. How did your plan work for you in the first round. Well, I will answer that it fucking sucked. Your paper champion and your bitch Souter could not get the job done. Hell you tried your best to screw myself and Tarrasque over and it back fired on you. Tarrasque was the monster that I knew he was. You could not stop him, and we'll, it was yours truly that pinned your World Champion to advance in this tournament.

Joe Pecci.. Laugh it up now boy.. You will get what is coming to you soon enough.

Frostbite.. I find the humor in it, that you have decided to turn on your paper champion because he could not get the job done or maybe he just did not fit the type of champion that you want. So Soutter jumps to the front of the line and gets himself a shot at the title. I find that rather convenient. He does not matter because you ever walks out with the title, it will be mine soon enough. Because I told you before I am going to burn this bitch to the ground and I am not going to go back on my word.

Crowd.. YEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

Frostbite turns away from the camera as he closes his eyes once again.

Frostbite.. Now down to business and up next for Tarrasque and myself Alex Withers and Leon Washington. I must admit these two have done very for themselves in this tournament. I will give credit where it is due. But now gentlemen the fun is over with. Your run is about to come to an end, I am afraid.

Frostbite opens his eyes once again as he is just starring at the locker right in front of him.

Frostbite.. Alex, I have listening very closely to a lot of your comments throughout the cup. You like to brag about this XHW and what you have done here or have already done or whatever case might be. Alex, please if you will allow me to indulge you and tell you a little story.

Frostbite gets up as he walks over to that same locker in front of him as he leans on it.

Frostbite.. You see I knew this gentleman who many years ago thought all of his accomplishments meant something to the outside world. He had done it all in the one company that he worked for. He thought you could step outside and into that real world and do the exact same thing. He could have that same success. He was that big fish in a small pond. But once he did, the real world punched him right back in his face and gave him a dose of reality. Sure he had to adapt to how things were done in the real world but once he got the hang of it, well there was no stopping him and for almost 16 years he continues to be a success. And you know who that guy is?

Frostbite points to himself..

Frostbite.. I thank Shane Lawson and his VWA for showing me the error of my ways, it made me better. Alex you talk about what you have done in this network that you call XHW. But that is what you have done here only. Have you ever step outside of this network and done anything. Maybe you have and maybe I need to Google it. For you see, I have done that over and over again. I have been very lucky to become a 17 time World champion, I have won several other titles, I have won tournaments, I have won awards and I am a 6 time hall of famer. And you know that was all elsewhere not in one network.

Crowd.. OHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

Frostbite.. You said earlier that your agent told you that about the cup and you tell us this will just add to your legacy. Excuse me would cement it. Alex that is telling me that your career is coming to an end or is it not because that is how I would take it. You see we differ there. Because I am adding onto my legacy by myself and Tarrasque winning the cup and my friend you and Leon are simply another footnote onto my growing list of people I have beaten the hell out of. Alex, I will be quite honest I did not know anything about you or your boy, Leon at all. I never heard of you until now. But that is right you all apart of this great network. Alex, the four of us and go out into the ring later and have a blood bath because I have been involved quite a few and my partner would simply love that. We could go out there and have a five star match that your network will talk about for years to come, and I have been involved in many of those. Whichever path you and your partner choose we are ready for. But are you ready for reality when it kicks you right in the ass because it will.

Frostbite laughs..

Frostbite.. Alex I get it, every company feels they are the best out there. I have been in many great companies and this place is no different then the rest and that includes your network. I do not care much for Soutter or Pecci, but I respect the history of SWAT. Never man cares for me, because I came in here and said I was going to burn the bitch to the ground and I will. But Alex they know that when they sign Frostbite to a contract he can put asses in the seats. Alex and Leon, I have been doing that for a long time. Over many different companies and made lots of money doing so. Can you really say that, the both of you? I guess you can because you are part of this network?

Frostbite slaps his knee.

Frostbite.. But I hardly doubt it.. Alex you really believe you are here to save this company. Alex you said this company needs to be saved. SWAT has been around for years, long before you and Leon ever got into this sport. The list of Legends that worked for SWAT well if I named then all I would be holding up this program. The people that ran this company were legends men such as Packer..

Crowd.. PACKER!!!!! PACKER!!!!! PACKER!!!!

Frostbite... You see these people know how great this place is.. And this place will continue to do great things when you are long gone that includes the four of us.

Frostbite sits back down on the floor right in the exact same spot.

Frostbite.. Alex, I thought it was funny that you would actually make fun of my name. If I had a dime for somebody in this business cracked on my name, I might be a billionaire by now. So get some new material why don't you. But nevertheless, I am sure this match I have no doubt will be the best one throughout this cup. I certainly hope you and Leon have a nice game plan for the monster known as Tarrasque because I do not believe you will. And trust me you do not have any game plan for the cold hearted bastard. I am sure deep down you probably have something witty for that one right, but all you need to remember.

Frostbite closes his eyes.

Frostbite.. I hope we both bring the strippers and the music because quite frankly the music will be the blues and those whores and they console you after you get your asses ran over and out of this cup once and for all. I do agree with you on one thing. The party is certainly over. Because I certainly plan on having my cake and eating it to.

Frostbite holds his knuckles up toward the camera still with his eyes closed, but slowly he turns his hands and flips the double bird.

Frostbite.. See you in the bitches..

As Frostbite begins to sing...

Turn out the lights the party is over...

A smirk across his lips as we fade out and back to ringside.

Andrew Fulton.. Mighty strong words from Frostbite.

Joe Pecci.. I am not his biggest fan, but he did same somethings I do agree with as far as the SWAT goes.

[Malik Epps]

The scene opens backstage, where a small monitor was hanging on the wall in front of a positioned camera. The red light was on as the camera starts to record and seconds later, the man from Brooklyn strolls into the shot with a confident grin. He'd taken his fair share of damage...something that was more of a testament to the level of competition that they had faced already. Only he and Alex Withers both knew, everything they'd been through up to this point? It was only the beginning. Washington takes a couple short breaths then cuts his eyes towards the camera, greeting it with that same look of confidence as he tilts his head back a bit and starts speaking...



Leon Washington: Yo, what's good everybody? It's ya boy Leon Washington comin' at ya, an just like the old song says...we're halfway there. Two teams down an another two to go cause me an my boy Alex, we ain't stoppin' til we're the one an only team that's left standin'...opportunities like this mean a lot to me, it's a chance to continue to perfect my craft an to keep on givin' back to the fans who've had a place in my heart for a long damn time. ( he slaps his chest a couple times ) SWAT rolled out the welcome mat an gave us the opportunity to shine an bruh, that's all we been doin' since this tournament got started. Cause just like we've always done throughout our careers, me an Alex stepped up to the plate an proceeded to knock that bitch clean outta the park each an every time. An the response from the fans? Oh, it's been straight love from the first moment they saw our names in the tournament, cause they know we always keep it 100...

Washington pauses, casually lifting a finger and waggling it in front of the camera.

Leon Washington: Only that doesn't seem to be enough for some of the folks in the locker room. Cause I'm still hearin' certain people flappin' their gums about us, like we ain't gonna slap the taste outta their mouths the first chance we get. See, that's one of the huge differences...everybody here seems to wanna talk about it, only that ain't how we handle our business in the XHW. Over a decade I been goin' strong an I've always let my work in the ring do my talkin' for me. Cause it's real easy to stand backstage somewhere an talk shit. It's a whole different ballgame when you gotta look somebody in the eye, face to face. An that mentality is what separates us from the teams we've fought against so far. But from what I've seen, it ain't gonna be no different with the next team we're up against. A couple of guys sportin' some very cornball names, tryin' to flex on us with shit they accomplished somewhere else. That don't mean a damn thing here...

Washington continues to move about energetically, an amused look on his face as he starts to shake his head.

Leon Washington: Oh yeah, the disrespect is real as hell around here. Me an Alex have already put down two teams who made a big mistake comin' at us the way they did. Cause while they were tryin' to live up to the hype, we were busy beatin' the brakes off their asses...unfortunately for them, it was a case of somebody who couldn't measure up to the hype. I guess nobody taught 'em that when there's a dick measurin' contest, you always bet on black. ( he grins a little ) Two times now, I've been the one to drive that final nail in the coffin. The suckas out there might think that's me carryin' the team, but I know it's me bein' in the right place at the right time. Somebody tried to make it seem like I wasn't a legit star? Miss me with that shit. ( he scoffs ) Cause the fans damn sure lost their minds when I busted his ass out there in the middle of the ring. I'm not a star? Kiss my ass, bruh...enjoy watchin' the rest of the tournament from your couch...

Washington chuckles a bit, having no love lost for the Bro Code after the way they came at him.

Leon Washington: That bein' said, y'all can understand my frustration when I hear somebody like Fang McFrost...whatever he's supposedly callin' himself...y'all understand when somebody like that runs his mouth about us bein' a footnote to his legend. Complete disrespect...somethin' that I'm gettin' damn tired of. I spent a long time climbin' up from the bottom to get to where I am today, I went out an earned my respect the hard way! An there's been dozens of guys who came at me sideways, tellin' me the same shit...that I wasn't nothin' but some footnote to their legacy. Only when all the smoke had cleared, they were the ones who ended up bein' a footnote to mine. We all want to shine when the lights are on bright but some folks don't see it that way ( he shrugs slightly ) so I don't think twice when I drop 'em straight on their head out there in that ring, cause like it or not...RESPECT WILL BE PAID. An I can damn sure guarantee that...

Suddenly, the expression on his face fades away and is replaced by something of a scowl. Washington had always been more of a positive guy, only it was clear that Frostbite had definitely lit a fire underneath him with his comments.

Leon Washington: An when it comes to Frosty, I can respect the man's talent. At least what I've seen of it. He's a tough son of a bitch, there ain't no two ways about it. I saw him turn the momentum of a match around with a single precise shot. An that takes some experience...genuine experience to pull off. Him an Tarrasque made it through two teams, the same as us. That much, I can respect about him. Only when it comes down to a personal level, man to man? ( he shakes his head slowly ) No respect. Congratulations, you've been world champ a grand total of 17 times. It's impressive but just like I told the Bro Code, all I hear is that you've lost 17 world title matches. Is that what we're expectin' out there...that the sorta 'excellence' you built your name on? Cause if that's all, then you're in for one hell of a long night. You can go against just about anybody an hold your own when it comes to throwin' hands, ain't no doubt about that. But I've already proven that it takes a split second for everythin' to fly to pieces. An bruh? ( he lifts two fingers ) I've proven it TWICE already...

A small hint of arrogance from Brooklyn's Finest, although some would say it wasn't arrogance if you could back it up. Washington and Alex are certainly two people who can back up anything that comes out of their mouths.

Leon Washington: Then there's his boy, Tarrasque. ( he starts to shake his head ) I ain't gonna lie, the man's a beast. He's big an mean an he's a lot like his partner, in the sense that they both get off on doin' as much damage as possible. Only you still gotta add submissions...somethin' the man seems to do extremely well, thanks to the abundance of raw power he's got. Like his partner, I got no problem showin' respect for the man's abilities inside the ring. He's built like a truck an probably hits like one too, which is somethin' we gotta steer clear of if we wanna make it through this. But hey, this is exactly the kinda challenge I'd expect when we're this close to the finals. Cause we came in already knowin' that the fight would only get more difficult the higher we climbed, that's a reality both of us were prepared for. But the monster don't intimidate me as much as he might wanna believe...

Washington's mind turns back the clock, glossing over some of the most violent encounters he'd ever had in his career an how he's grown from each and every one of them. But he blinks almost immediately, bringing him right back to the present again.

Leon Washington: This ain't my first rodeo, bruh. Over the years, I've dealt with a lotta psychos. Some of 'em so damn bad, they would turn your damn hair white. An everytime, they banked on that twisted reputation to score some intimidation points against me. Unfortunately...there's not many people who can have me shook like that. Tryin' to intimidate me? That ain't gonna get him nothin' but knocked straight onto his ass. I don't back down from anybody an I damn sure ain't about to curl up into a tiny ball at the sight of somebody like him. So anybody that's in his ear, lookin' to convince him that all he's gotta do is growl an he'll have the battle half won? Y'all are settin' that man up for complete failure, whether y'all know it or not. Cause me an Alex? We don't sweat monsters. We put 'em down.

Washington takes a half step back, pulling his cap off an running a hand over his head slowly.

Leon Washington: When we first came here, we came in with one outcome in mind. Run the table, win the Anzac Cup, an show everybody up in here exactly what the XHW is all about. An we're two matches away from doin' just that. Frostbite an Tarrasque, they're aggressive...uncontrollable...a couple of heavy hitter, no doubt. But we ain't gonna get blown away that easily. ( he waggles a finger ) Cause we ain't gonna pussyfoot around with anybody, we're gonna cut 'em down one team at a time. We're here to kick ass an take names, an if you're in our way we ain't gonna hesitate to roll right on over you. An that means anybody still left in this tournament, it don't matter who y'all are, when y'all look across the ring an see the two of us...you better come strapped, or don't come at all. Cause we're here to win the tournament...everythin' else is secondary. Bottom line? THERE IS NO TURNIN' BACK FOR US NOW...

He runs his hand over his head again, then slips his cap back on and cocks it slightly to the side. The adrenaline was flowing and that swagger was definitely in full effect as Washington points at the camera.

Leon Washington: So get suited an booted, bitches...cause them XHW boys are comin' to whoop that ass...

He smirks and throws up the deuces as the scene fades to black.

[SWAT Team]

Jeremy Tucker: Chianti has advanced so let's see who they face in the finals.

["My Own Summer" begins to play across the PA system and after a short delay out walks Alex Withers, dressed with a black zip up hoody lifted over his head, simple black boots and trunks he walks with a purpose towards the ring. Sliding under the bottom rope he heads towards his corner without even a look towards the camera. Rubbing at each wrist he waits until the last possible moment to take his top off and bounces on the balls of his feet, glaring at the refree and awaiting his tag team partner.]

Frank Salazar :  And their opponents .... firstly ... Coming in at 6’ and 170 pounds ... hailing from Lansing, Detroit, Michigan. ALEX WITHERS!!!! And his tag team partner, hailing from Brooklyn, New York, coming in at 6’5 & 242 lbs .... LEON WASHINGTON!!!!

[The sirens go off and the fans immediately rise to their feet as the arena lights switch to a series of swirling blues and whites. Seconds later, Washington comes out through the curtains and onto the stage, running to one side to get the fans all fired up before doing it again on the other side. He then plays to camera...continuously working the crowd and slapping hands on his way down the ramp, before he breaks into a sprint near the bottom and slides into the ring. The spotlights focus on one of the turnbuckles, while the blue lights continue to swirl about and Washington climbs the turnbuckle and throws a fist high into the air. The crowd reacts as thousands of flashes go off, while Washington tosses his cap out into the crowd then pulls off his jersey and flings it out the other side. He turns and drops down into the ring, getting limbered up as he awaits his opponents Frostbite and Tarrasque.]

Andrew Fulton: I love these two guys! They are a well oiled machine as a team! My prediction for who's walking out with that gold Anzac Cup!


Frank Salazar: Ladies and gentlemen..this IS the continuation of the Anzac Cup 2019 Tag Team Tournament!! This is a one fall match up..let me introduce from Parts Unknown..standing at 6'7, weighing 375 pounds..he is TAAARRRRAAASQUUUUE !

["Ladies and Gentlemen” by, Saliva begins playing as Tarrasque walks out from the back. He paces the entrance stage like a caged animal, growling as the fans booing at him. He stops and flexes his arms with a loud roar, silencing nearby fans before he heads down to the ring.]

Jeremy Tucker: Here comes my pick to win it all! They got a bye last round while Withers and Washington had a complete match. They have to be the team in the best shape at this point.


Andrew Fulton: Yeah but can Frostbite control this beast? That remains to be seen. I don't think anybody can control him and that may be this teams downfall.


Frank Salazar: And his partner..from Boulder, Colorado..standing 6'2 weighing 225 pounds..The Cold Hearted Bastard....FROSTBIIIIIITE!!

["Seek and Destroy", by Metallica rocks the stadium! We see lotus flying on the Titan tron for a few seconds as more and more join in, until day turns to night as the image fades out, and the next image you see is tanks firing in the air, and right after that image we see soliders walking in unison and that image fades out and another of a huge nuclear explosion as you see nothing but ashes and dust of a city. The lights in the arena go completely dark for a few seconds as it comes back up a blue light is seen up the show of the steps as someone is standing up there wearing a gray hoodie with their head down. As they slowly pick up their head, we can see an intense look in their blue eyes, we see that it is Frostbite. He takes a walk down the steps as fans reached out to touch his hands or his broad shoulders. As he stops midway looking into the crowd as he nods his head as the crowd chants his name. He gets to the bottom of the step, he climbs over the barricade. He quickly takes off his hoodie and hands it over to some fan at ringside. He turns his attention  to the ring and his partner with an intense look in his blue eyes. He begins to climb the steps and jumps over the top ropes. He continues to look at his partner not taking his eyes off of him as the lights turns back to normal and his music fades as he is ready for a war. Frostbite and Tarrasque shake hands and wait for the bell to ring.]

Jeremy Tucker: The bell sounds and here we go! 


Andrew Fulton: The winner of this match goes to the finals!


Jeremy Tucker: Chianti..Joey Morelli and "Timeless" Alex Turner are already in. This is for the right to face them for the most prestigious cup in this business..the Anzac Cup!


Andrew Fulton: It looks like it will be "The Cold Hearted Bastard" Frostbite against this "Outsider" team's Alex Withers!


Jeremy Tucker: Collar and Elbow tie up and neither of these two high caliber athletes are giving an inch.


Andrew Fulton: Speaking of inches..how many inches does Roxylishus make the men in the audience's shaft grow just by looking at her tits!?


Jeremy Tucker: Would you stop! Her or her man aren't even in the match.


Andrew Fulton: I can't help it. Her tits are always on my mind. I wish they were somewhere else though.


Jeremy Tucker: Arm Drag by Frostbite but Withers gets up with one of his own. Irish whip into the ropes my Withers and a Leap Frog by Frostbite off the ropes and a Drop Kick by Frostbite. Withers quickly up and he lands a Drop Kick to the face of Frostbite. Both men back to their feet and listen to these fans!


Andrew Fulton: These two playing a game of anything you can do I can do better.


Jeremy Tucker: Frostbite puts out his hand and Alex Withers shakes his hand.


Andrew Fulton: Then a stiff right hand to the jaw of Frostbite by "Detroit's Finest" Alex Withers. I love this guy. Forget the handshake we got a cup to win!


Jeremy Tucker: More stiff fists and mixing it up with stiff kicks..Alex Withers is stomping him a mudhole and walking it dry here in New Zealand at Anzac Cup Tournament 2019, live, right here on the XHF NETWORK!


Andrew Fulton: The King of XHW is showing these Xtreme Hardcore Wrestling cats mean business!


Jeremy Tucker: SPEAR!! SPEAR!!


Andrew Fulton: That Spear nearly took Frostbite out of his boots. Withers back up and he's climbing the top rope.


Jeremy Tucker: Diving Headbutt by Withers and it connected!! Shades of "The Crippler" Chris Benoit!


Andrew Fulton: Alex Withers with the cover..1...2..3!!


Jeremy Tucker: No broken up by Tarrasque!


Andrew Fulton: Tarrasque lifts Withers up and he's rag dolling him around the ring.


Jeremy Tucker: Referee Dub Edwards is trying to get control of this monster.


Andrew Fulton: I don't think that's possible.


Jeremy Tucker: Bear Hug into a Power Bomb!!


Andrew Fulton: Leon Washington is in to try and help his partner but Frostbite with a Hail Storm! 


Jeremy Tucker: Tarrasque has Withers pressed over his head..he's carrying him around!


Andrew Fulton: What is this idiot doing?


[Tarrasque gets a running start then hucks Withers over the top rope and all the way into the fans. The fans catch Withers and start surfing him around.]


Fans: Holy Shit...Holy Shit!


[Frostbite DDT's Leon Washington over the top rope and outside thru the Brooklyn Announce Table.]


Jeremy Tucker: FREEZE FRAME!! FREEZE FRAME!!


Brooklyn Commentator: There is no turning back for us now! He put'em down! Respect will be paid!


Andrew Fulton: Frostbite may have taken himself and "The Black Superman" out!


Jeremy Tucker: They look like they've been in a crash'em up derby here in Syndicate Wrestling And Tradition!!


[The fans surf Withers over to the guardrail and Withers jumps over and on to his feet. Tarrasque runs at him and Withers jumps up and flips onto the top rope. An angry Tarrasque runs at him yelling something nobody understands. Withers leaps off the top and lands a missle drop kick.]


Andrew Fulton: Missile Drop Kick by Withers but quickly Tarrasque is back to his feet almost like he no sold it!


[Tarrasque runs at Withers. Withers blasts him with a Headlock Driver.]


Jeremy Tucker: Withers with that Bulldog type of maneuver!


Andrew Fulton: No effect on this big walking diesel truck!


[Tarrasque stops and beats his chest as Withers eyes get back at the no sell.]


[Frostbite gets up from the car wreck at the Brooklyn announce table. He jumps on the apron and yells at Tarrasque.]


Andrew Fulton: Frostbite is yelling something at his beast but Tarrasque looks confused.


Jeremy Tucker: I think he's telling him to tag.


[Frostbite keeps yelling at the confused beast when he is Cradle Suplex off the apron onto the floor by a recovered Washington. Washington gets up and starts yelling at Tarrasque. Tarrasque starts snorting and running at Leon. Leon jumps onto the apron and reveals a chair. Tarrasque tries to put on the breaks but instead gets blasted with the chair right between his eyes. Tarrasque finally goes down. Tarrasque tries to quickly get up but Withers hits him with his curb stomp finisher.]


Jeremy Tucker: Stay Down! Stay Down!


Andrew Fulton: Look at you! Rooting for these XWH Outsiders? Trying to be like me?


Jeremy Tucker: That's the name of his finisher you jack ass! Tag made by Withers to Leon Washington!


[Tarrasque gets up quickly once again and snatches Withers up by his hair and throws him over the top rope and onto the concrete floor. Tarrasque starts to beat his chest when he is surprised by Leon Washington's Stunner.]


Jeremy Tucker: Brooklyn Bustah'! Brooklyn Bustah'! The cover!


Andrew Fulton: 1...2....3!!


Jeremy Tucker: This one is over!! Withers and Washington move on to the finals!!


Frank Salazar: Ladies and gentlemen the winners of the match and moving on to the finals...WASHINGTON AND WIIIIITTTHHERS!!!


Andrew Fulton: Yes! Just like I predicted all along!


Jeremy Tucker: Them and about 8 other teams in between. What a final we are going to have..The team of SWAT'S "Timeless" Alex Turner and SEE'S Joey Morelli vs. These Outsiders from XHW Alex Withers and Leon Washington!! We'll be right back!!

[SWAT Team]

[We switch to the back and we see Timeless and Roxylishus standing by with Warren W Webber. Timeless has his top off and his Greek god like body glistens, the lights causing a reflection far more stunning than any sunset, then there is Roxylishus, she is the only thing that comes close to matching the awesomeness that is Timeless, she is decked out in a lingerie style purple evening gown, and she is the definition of SPECTACULAR.]


Warren W Webber : Folks, we are standing by with Chianti member, Timeless Alex Turner and his lovely valet, Roxylishus. Guys, you are one match away from winning the Anzac Cup, how does it feel?

Timeless : Feels great Wazz. This is our third Cup, and in these three events, we have seen and done it all, except for winning the whole thing, that all changes tonight, when we will stand victorious and be crowned the 2019 Anzac Cup winners.

Roxylishus : 3rd time lucky Webber.

Warren W Webber : Your last match with Risky Business, there is a lot of talk that there was a fast count, and that Lynn Brewster should not have been officiating.

Timeless : Talk is cheap, and so is that suit Webber. Radu thinks he is such top shit, but he picked that fight with Brewster. HE started it. HE went out of his way to provoke and humiliate her, and now the payback comes to him, and as it so happens, it coincides with our progressing past him.
.
Well, BOO HOO. It could well have been against the Fairtex Dynasty she cost them, even the Bar Code if they fluked their way past us, which we all know would never happen in a million different scenarios, and didn’t happen, but the fact is, Radu poked the bear, and now he has to deal with the consequences. Are them consequences him beating the living tar out of her? I really don’t know, and i really, don’t care. We won, he lost.

[Timeless flexes, a tiny bit for the cameras, nothing over the top, just a brief clench, but the muscles rippled, and the panties, they dripped.]

Timeless : The thing is, even without Brewster’s arrival and officiating, we would have won.

[Timeless flexes again.]

Timeless : Hats off to Risky Business though. Great match, great competition. It should have been us in the final. I know it. You know it. We all know it. These XYZ chumps got lucky falling in the ‘visitors’ side of the brackets.

Roxylishus : Skate through beating chumps like Bro Code and The Convicted and Frostbite and Tarrasque? Please. Candy and I could have beaten them limp wimps.

Warren W Webber : They mean business. I think they are the real dea ...

Timeless : (cutting him off.) No Webber! WE ARE THE REAL DEAL! CHIANTI!! They are .... ok? Yeah, they are OK. The REAL DEAL! That is a hoot! If they were on our side of the draw, the SWAT side, they would be out first round, 2nd tops! Then we would have the Risky Business Vs Chianti final the world craved, instead, Risky Business is goneski one round early, and our Anzac Cup triumph is sullied by defeating the likes of (droning voice) Alex Withers and Leon Washington in the final.

Roxylishus : How now brown cow. What did the clown say with a frown? Stay down.

Warren W Webber : You don’t think your opponents are worthy?

Timeless : Worthy? WORTHY!? One of them is 170 freakin pounds dripping FUCKIN wet!

What can he possibly do to THIS!

[Timeless full flexes. Panties world wide are wetter than his 170 pounds out of the shower.]

Roxylishus : 170 pounds? Is this junior high? I don’t think so, this is SWAT! This is the major leagues baby!

Warren W Webber : You don’ ....

Timeless : (interrupting him, again) Shut the fuck up already Webber! Who cares who progressed thru that shitty bracket. So the ‘visitors’ got a ‘fair go’ and all got to face each other.

Last left is really first loser. Did they get thru because they are better than the other ‘vistors’, or other ‘visitors’ worse than them. What’s the difference you ask, plenty. See, we are better than everyone. We have beaten the best there is, we know it cause we seen it. Who have they beaten in this tourney, what have they even done. Sure you show up, and retort them other teams.

Roxylishus : Anyone can do THAT! Retort this!

[Roxylishus crotch chops the camera.]

Warren W Webber : Retort?

Timeless : YES! Retort! Sit back and cherry pick thinking you are some wordsmith talking about what others talk about. I talk about what I want! I set the standard. I watch you jokers, you come here thinking it will promote your fed, and you can just grab OUR Cup and no one in the world can possibly compare with you, and then nek minute, its WHOA, these guys are NEXT LEVEL!

Roxylishus :Words smith .... Swordsmith ... (stares longingly at Timeless, leaving it obvious he is a true ‘swordsmith’)

BOOYAH! We will win the Cup, and we will waltz into your hovel fed with the cup while you are crying about your loss and how unfairly you were treated, and we will punk your asses right there in your own fuckin back yard!

Timeless : Oi! PISSANT!! Wanna know who is the best SWAT can Aquire? Who is the best we can attract and we got? YOU’RE LOOKING AT IT!

Roxylishus : “This is not a game” he says to Tarrasque, little big mouth, and waffles about action figures, boy, you are the SIZE OF AN ACTION FIGURE!

Warren W Webber : Size insnt everyth ...

Timeless : Says every “little” man. (Timeless towers over Webber. 6’3 and 262 pounds of pure magnificence towering.) Want to know what this is the real time for. This is the time, where we get to present these dudes with their prize, before taking ours.

Roxylishus : (reaches into her HUGGGGE cleavage and pulls out a blue ribbon.) Congratulations whoever is facing us in the finals. Here is your ribbon.

Warren W Webber : You don’t even know their names?

Timeless : I do. She doesn’t. Them out there in the front row. They don’t. A couple of marks in the nose bleed section and the smarks all over social media ruining our business, they know them, they think these 5’5 170 pound weaklings are the bomb. They love watching them ‘work’, nek minute they run into a Timeless and Joey brick fuckin wall. Game Over.

Roxylishus : He likes to google his opponents, i googled him. A fucken cliché. Dad lost his job became an alchy. Mum needed affection and attention and became the local bike / train, then eventually left them high and dry. Blah blah blah. Sounds like a Madonna video film clip.

Warren W Webber : That’s a little ....

Timeless : NO!! He’s little!!! His partner not much better. That’s right Washington. We haven’t forgotten about you, even though the rest of the audience has.

Roxylishus : Washington thinks he is the moral compass of the wrestling world, meanwhile my attention span just nose dived into a downward bored cycle the likes i haven’t felt since matched with the Bar Code.

Warren W Webber : So, its a fate ...

Timeless : (interrupting again) It’s in the bag Webber.

We are CHIANTI!

We like to Root and make all the Loot!

We take out the Trash, and collect all the Cash!

We break your heart and tear you apart!

We make Stacks and break Backs!

I am the Ultimate Male Supreme!

Every breathing Woman’s Wet Dream!

A God Damn Wrestling Machine!

[Unfadable.]

[SWAT Team]

"Ladies and Gentlemen" by Saliva begins playing as Tarrasque walks out from the back. He makes his way down to the ring to the boos of the crowd with a wide smile and a bit of raw meat dangling off of his chin.

Andrew Fulton: What's Tarrasque doing coming down to the ring? He lost!

Jeremy Tucker: Maybe he has some last words before he goes off to the sunset.

Andrew Fulton: Oh right. His contract was only for the tournament. Then he should be on his way!

Jeremy Tucker: Like I said. He could have some parting words.

Tarrasque rolls into the ring with a microphone in his hand. He roars to the fans, getting a mixture of boos and roars back.

Tarrasque: Me going, but me have one thing do. Frostbite, you no help me win! Me say me will break you if lose. Guess what? We losed!

Andrew Fulton: What's he trying to say?

Jeremy Tucker: That he wants to break Frostbite for the loss?

Andrew Fulton: He doesn't have anything left for his contract! He does know that if he has a match tonight that he won't get paid?

"Seek and Destroy" by Metallica begins playing as Frostbite walks out from the back to stand on the entrance stage.

Frostbite: You want a match? Fine! Stick around and we can get it set up!

Tarrasque: Me no stay here. You come down and fight NOW!

Andrew Fulton: He does want a match!

Jeremy Tucker: You think that Frostbite will grant it to him?

Andrew Fulton: We're set to find out in a minute.

Frostbite: We can't fight now. It's not on the schedule. Stay beyond tonight and we can have a prop-

Tarrasque: It ok. You coward. Me understand. You will never beat...Hell's Bouncer. Hahahahaha!

Frostbite: What are you saying? You want a fight now? You got it!

Frostbite begins running down to the ring. He rolls into the ring and begins hitting Tarrasque with lefts and rights. Tarrasque grabs Frostbite by the shoulders and delivers a thunderous headbutt that staggers the smaller man.

Andrew Fulton: I guess they're doing it.

Jeremy Tucker: A ref is heading down to the ring to make this official!

Tarrasque whips Frostbite into the ropes, nearly hurling him through the air. On the rebound, Tarrasque hits Frostbite in the gut to flip him over.

Tarrasque grabs Frostbite by the back of the neck, pulling him up, and going for a suplex. Frostbite hits a jawbreaker instead that sends Tarrasque to the mat.

When Tarrasque gets up to his knees, Frostbite goes for a superkick. Tarrasque catches the foot in his hand, pulling Frostbite, grabbing by by the balls, and lifting. Frostbite's eyes bulge as he lets out a shriek of pain.

Andrew Fulton: Rise of the Feminine Side! Is this one all over?

Jeremy Tucker: Oh my!

Frostbite punches Tarrasque in the throat, causing him to release the hold. He grabs the beast and hits a belly to belly suplex. He hits a few kicks to the ribcage.

Frostbite: You were the one to lose the match!

Tarrasque: You not help!

Frostbite pulls Tarrasque up and whips him into the ropes. He hits a cutter on the rebound and goes for the pinfall!

One


Tw-Tarrasque kicks out!

Frostbite jumps to his feet, greeting the rising monster with a drop kick that staggers him backward a few steps. Frostbite keeps on him, slamming home several knife edge chops. He hits a pump handle slam, sending the beast back down to the mat.

Frostbite goes up to the top rope, pats his elbow real quick, and leaps! Tarrasque gets a foot in the air from the falling Frostbite to hit him in the jaw!

Jeremy Tucker: Frostbite telegraphed that move!

Andrew Fulton: You have to hit Tarrasque with a mack truck to keep him down!

Tarrasque stands up with a grin. He rips Frostbite off of the mat and hits him full in the mouth with a closed fist, sending a spray of spittle and blood into the air. He grabs Frostbite up into the air and hits a massive power bomb! He stands over the fallen Frostbite with a roar as he flexes his muscles.

Tarrasque pulls Frostbite up again and hurls him through the air and into the corner. He follows up with an avalanche that nearly moves the ring a few inches.

Tarrasque grabs Frostbite by the shoulders, brings his head back, and goes for a thunderous headbutt! He smashes Frostbite's nose with blood splattering about!

Jeremy Tucker: Frostbite looks like he's fading fast!

Andrew Fulton: Someone should come down here and control this monster! Allen Anderson used to be his manager. Where is he?

Jeremy Tucker: He died on a RSW show. Live on the air.

Tarrasque grabs Frostbite by the throat with both hands, lifting him up into the air, and turning toward the middle of the ring. The ref begins to shout at Tarrasque to get him to release Frostbite.

Tarrasque hurls Frostbite across the ring like a rag doll, stalking him across the ring with a laugh.

Tarrasque: You make me do all work. You no help when me under attack. You get broken today!

Frostbite slowly works his way to his feet with the use of the ropes. He turns back and strikes Tarrasque in the jaw with a back elbow. He strikes again and again with the elbow.

With Tarrasque starting to recover, Frostbite wipes his hand across his own face and flicks the blood into Tarrasque's eyes. He hits a powerslam, hooking the leg for the pinfall!

One


Two


Thre-Tarrasque kicks out!

Frostbite kneels up for a moment and then stands up with Tarrasque meeting him. Frostbite gets the drop on him and hits the Wind Chill Factor!

He pulls Tarrasque up and hits a front brain buster before going for the pinfall!

One


Two


Thre-Tarrasque kicks out!

Frostbite rolls out of the ring, grabs a steel chair, and rolls back in. Tarrasque stands up with a defiant roar as Frostbite slams the steel chair into his forehead.

Tarrasque no sells the shot and lets out another roar. Frostbite hits him again, this time busting open the giant. He hits a third time, this time sending Tarrasque down to the mat.

Frostbite casts aside the broken steel chair and applies a camel clutch, sitting lower on Tarrasque's back and reaching around with a front chancery to pull back with all his might.

Tarrasque just lays there and takes it with a sloppy smile, though he begins to fade fast.

The ref checks his arm and it drops.


He checks a second time and the arm drops.


He checks a third time and…


Tarrasque is out like a light!

The ref signals for the bell to be rung and raises Frostbite's arm into the air.

Frank Salazar: Winner of the match via submission...Frostbite!

Frostbite makes his way to the back as Tarrasque starts to stir.

[alexwithers]

It had been quite a few moments since Alex Withers and Leon Washington once again backed up everything they said they were going to do, and progressed through to the final of the 2019 Anzac Cup. Withers was going through some final preparations for the match, the re-taping of his wrists had just finished one of the medics had come in and given him the all clear.

Alex Withers: So Frostbite and Tarrasque huh? That was the best that our side of the draw could offer. Seriously for them it must have been like going in to a gunfight with butter knives. They were screwed from the moment that the bell rung and it is only because we didn’t want to waste our time on part time nobodies that they are even walking… But, nevertheless… once again we proved once again that we don’t offer predictions we give promises. And this time we promise that we’re turning Chianti in to over hyped piss water.

Withers bent forward and laced up his boots, it was at that moment that XHW legend and Hall of Famer J.T.Cash came in to his locker room with a smirk, Cash trained Withers and had found out that he was wrestling in the Anzac Cup.

J.T.Cash: You got this bro, you and Washington have been ripping it up and dude all the boys back in the XHW are proud dude. Just one more huh?

Withers nodded

J.T.Cash: You know anything about these dudes? Seemed as if they could go in their last match.

Alex Withers: And for SWAT these two are as good as it gets, but you want to compare them to the XHW… nah, wouldn’t jerk the curtain. And you know something Cashman, I’d love them to prove me wrong, I’d love them to come out all guns blazing, I’d love them to slow us down, I’d love them to give us a fight that we have been so far waiting for… but I don’t think it’s going to happen. Hell these two dudes could really prove me wrong, fly over from this piss pot place and join the company and really see what competition is about. Thing is, they won’t… none of these asshats will because there is one thing I am realising about this XHF Network… it has a hundred companies and apparently a million fighters but not one of them know what it is like to succeed, not one of them know what the major leagues look like. The XHF Network is an overhyped, hell hole of ego’s and nobodies… I came here thinking that I was going to make a name for myself… unless you’re an internet fucktard wrestling fan, nobody has ever heard of this damn place. So yeah, they can go… in the same way as rejects like Alyx Gates could go, in the same way as Permafrost could go, in the way as a million no names who never made it in our company can go. Main event, final match… it’s a whole new ball game and they are going to realise it is a whole new level

Withers and Cash fist bump as Cash nods his head backing out of the locker room to go take his seat

Alex Withers: Oh boys, are you really ready for this? Because this is going to smart a little

Withers chuckles as he turns his attention to the camera

Alex Withers: What do I make of our opponents? What do I really make of two people who relied on a fast count and a screw job to get to the finals… and they say that we had the easy path. Come on guys, when you, you have to know that at least some people are listening, not everyone is going to take a piss break when you show your face. But hey, if you need a helping hand to go through then by all means take advantage it’s all but know this… if that two dollar street hooker that apparently is management material sticks her two cents in to a match with Alex Withers in it… then she, along with anyone else who tries to help you two will know what it means why I say Stay Down. So we have we got Alex Turner… Timeless apparently… I’ll get to him when I am good and ready first up let’s talk The Godson of SWAT Joey Morelli….. Wow… the Godson of SWAT. I’d rather be the fucking lovechild of Aileen Wurnos and Charles Manson… it’d at least come with less shame and stigma. Seriously, you want to celebrate that… I’ve come here to SWAT and instantly realised that it’s not just there for the taking, but it’s here for trashing… it’s the cesspit of professional wrestling, the toilet bowl of the sport that I lead… and you want to be known as the Godson of SWAT. Fuck me dude, your achievements in life must be pretty low to want that around your neck… I mean from what I can see you’ve got a set of deformed twins and you play happy families with a woman who is absolutely banging your neighbour the second you are out of the door… You’re tagging with a guy who’s better than you in every single way, and the only way that you can stand out is by tugging on his fucking coat tails like he tugs on his uncles dick. But Joey, before we get personal…. And I promise you cheech that we will… let’s get to business…

Withers cricks his neck back and forth for a moment, moves over to the table and grabs his knee pads, pulling one on at a time he doesn’t shift his gaze from the monitor

Alex Withers: You are facing two bonafide leaders in the sport of professional wrestling, who at every turn since coming to this tournament have had to face fighter after fighter telling us that where we come from isn’t SWAT… and believe me it isn’t… it really isn’t. The fact is Xtreme Hardcore Wrestling is the mecca of the sport, it is the place where the best fight… I’m not a man that blows smoke up the asses of others but Leon Washington is a Hall of Fame cert, a man who can put his name to a litteny of titles, he is the gold standard in this sport… I am the most ruthless son of a bitch that this business has ever seen and you Joey are in over your head, Chianti are in over their head… now I know you’re not used to hearing that, I know you’ll scoff, I know you’ll joke… but believe me Joey… Chianti, one of the best teams in SWAT, probably one of the best teams on this damn network are in over their heads…

Withers takes in a deep breath of air and sucks in a huge slurp of water

Alex Withers: So what is it Joey, lame fuck dead beat Dad living with the inbred twins and the cheating wife… All looking to play happy families until the wrestling world is sick to the back teeth of it, or the guy who stands buy whilst his promo’s narrate bile bullshit that belongs on some Trump rally filled with inbred hilly billy hicks. Oh the jokes had me in tears bro, except not tears of laughter… it made me sad, it made me realise that there are some humans on this planet who really are fucking mankids. Chianti is the shit, on point and always lit… really…. Nah Joey, Chianti is shit, missed the whole fucking point and is about to be lit up and burned to the ground by yours truly. You want to hide behind your tag team partner, the guy with the talent… you’re the Janetty to his Michaels, the Stevie Ray to his Booker… you’re a fucking joke Joey… when this final is over you will be carted back home to your family… only your wife will have left you, taken the kids and left you with a bottle of Jack and a pistol… here’s my advice, take the jack, use the pistol because if you don’t a lifetime of bad memories from me kicking your ass all over the Anzac Cup final will eat you alive…

Withers threw a gun sign towards the camera mouthing the word ‘shoot’.





Alex Withers: And you know whilst we’re shooting from the hip, Alex Turner… you see I’m sure you’re pretty big shit where you come from, I’m sure in the Turner household you are the absolute mutts nutts, I’m sure Mama Turner has the welcome home banners all set up, Papa Turner has finished with his prostitute and has come home with the beer, Sister turner has finished with her ‘clients’ and are bringing home the strippers… the party is set, the Turner’s are ready to go but you see there are two big fucking problems standing in their way… one is Leon Washington and the others is yours truly. So Mama Turner put down the banners, Papa Turner get back to your paid fun, Sister Turner keep those nipple tassels handy because the final of the Anzac Cup isn’t going to be a fun one for Alex Turner, it’ll be a beating that will indeed be timeless, it’ll be forever… the bruises will fade, the cuts will heal, the bones will mend but the soul destroying fact that there will always be someone out there better than you Turner, it will eat away at you for the rest of your sad, pathetic life… And why should anyone doubt a word I am saying Turner… your failure is indeed Timeless, you said it yourself this is the third straight year you have been in this tinpot cup and whilst you say you have seen and done it all… you really haven’t have you because you’ve never won… and where I come, if you aint winning, you aint doing a damn thing.

Withers smirked and adjusted the tape that was wrapped around his wrists, he smirked towards the camera

Alex Withers: But hey, bro I heard you’re little anxiety ridden tantrum earlier, it was actually one of the most desperate things I have ever heard in my life. Withers and Washington had the easiest side of the draw, Withers and Washington follow where as the rest of SWAT lead the way, one of us is a only one hundred and seventy po…. Please, please for everybody’s sake shut the fuck up… If you are the best that SWAT has to offer and I have absolutely no reason to call you a liar then show some balls and admit you are going in to the ring with the best that you have ever faced, take a second to think about how you’re going to look when you go in to that ring with a pair of nobodies from the XHW and then get your ass handed to you. Your whole spiel was a desperate attempt to keep face, the problem is there is a streak of piss running down your leg that says you know that you are in over your head, you know that you haven’t just met your match, you have met your darkest days.

Withers shifts his head towards the door and nods his head at the road agent who is giving him the ten minutes to fight time signal

Alex Withers: See the thing is Timeless, there is SO much you are right about… So far this Anzac Cup has been a fucking walk through, it’s been like fishing in a barrel for us but we didn’t come here to walk through to the final and lose to the first people with a modicum of talent… that’s right Turner, get your tissues out because Alex Withers just paid you a compliment, get that slut Roxydoesthedishes to give you a hand or something. We came here to win, we came here to prove a point that no matter the competition, no matter the country, no matter the talent… XHW, Alex Withers and Leon Washington will always be just that much better. Make no mistake, this IS the final that the people who respect real wrestling wanted, this IS the final that is going to get this two bit company noticed on the world map, this IS the final that is going to get people talking and this IS the final that will make you realise that there are leagues… you’re in one… and we’re way, way out in front in a completely different league. And believe me, I promise you, you can go full Vinnie Mac and get a lump in your pants about muscle and size… I’ll let the boot of a one hundred and seventy pounds dripping wet junior high punk cave in your fucking skull… Put that one in your next panic promo and spin it bitch. And just whilst I’m on the subject… bitch, Roxylishus… wow, did you stop blowing the boss for your contract for two minutes and find the time to pen that little poem for Timeless… good job, you’re on the Ed Sheeran level of piss poor rhyming. So I took time out from kicking monkey piss out of people to pen one for you doll face…

Withers reached over in to the pocket of his bag and pulled out a sheet of paper, he looked at it, looked over it towards the camera and smiled warmly

Alex Withers: The cat sat on the mat Withers smirked
Meanwhile I caved your man’s head in with a baseball bat.
I watched him bleed like a period, girl
Your cum stained breath makes any man want to hurl
But hey you and Chianti, a match made in hell
But don’t worry I’ll end your dreams at the sound of the belL
These rhymes are {Mongo Edit: Nah we don't say that anymore}, they’re just like you
Roxy when you’re finished blowing the boss, sit back and enjoy the view
XHW leading the way bitches, wait and see
Proving Alex Withers is Everything You Will Never, Ever Be!!

Withers tossed the piece of paper in to the trash and shook his head

Alex Withers: Everything You Will Never Be! and believe me that includes 2019 Anzac Cup Champions

With that Withers took a deep breath and headed off camera towards the door pounding his fist in to the palm of his hands as the camera faded to black

[Malik Epps]

Our scene opens in one of the quieter hallways backstage, where Leon Washington leans back against a beige concrete wall with his hands tucked into the pockets of his jeans. The third round had come to pass and once again, the XHW flag was still flying. And now everything...including the tournament, the Anzac Cup, and the pride of everyone involved...all of it was on the line. There was only one match ahead of them and it would decide the winners of the Anzac Cup. Washington and Withers had both decided a long time ago the cup would be coming home with them, no matter what it took. And now, they were only one win away from making it happen.

Leon Washington: Alright, for those of y'all out there who are keepin' count? That makes it THREE teams who thought they had our numbers. THREE teams who thought they were gonna bounce us outta the tournament. THREE teams who were absolutely dead wrong. Unfortunately...three victories ain't enough for us to win the Anzac Cup, cause we've still got another challenge ahead of us. Another team that can't quite get it through their heads that we ain't just a couple nobodies they pulled in off the streets. We're here to represent the XHW an get our hands on the Anzac Cup, no matter what it takes. The competition to get here? It's been fierce. Cause everybody came here with the same damn intentions...but like they say on Highlander, there can only be one. ( he lifts his index finger ) One team to stand tall above the others. A tournament like this can definitely highlight talent from a lot of different places, but there's only one team who can win...

Washington raises his finger again, silently mouthing the words "only one team" to the camera.

Leon Washington: An despite how it all went down, I got mad respect for each of the teams we've beaten to get to this point. They may have acted like assholes but when they were in the ring, they each gave it all they had. An that deserves some respect. However, what doesn't...somethin' that we've had to deal with each an every round. An that's other teams tryin' to act like we don't belong here, pretendin' we ain't earned our spot in the finals. Cause it's like I've said before, the disrespect is real up in here. ( he smirks and shakes his head ) Only that's a big part of why we've made it this damn far in the first place. We don't get discouraged just cause somebody tries to shit on what we've done, all it does is remind us why it's so important to see OUR flag flyin' when this is all over! Cause there's always gonna be somebody who wants to discount what you've been through an the easiest way to shut 'em up? It's to stick your first straight down their throat...

The sound of the crowd out in the arena draws his attention momentarily, suddenly giving him an idea. Washington glances back to the camera and motions for the camera man to follow him as he starts towards the gorilla position.

Leon Washington: C'mon, there's somethin' I wanna show y'all right quick. Cause there's somethin' that's been pissin' me off since this began an I think it's time we up an laid that shit to rest once an for all. So c'mon, cause we're takin' this straight to the people...

The camera man follows Washington as he heads to the gorilla position, snagging a microphone off the table along the way. He hustles up the short set of steps and makes his way through the entrance and onto the stage, where he's met with a thunderous response from everyone...thousands of fans all standin' on their feet, cheering their hearts out as a loud "WA-SHING-TON" chant rumbles throughout the whole of the stadium. Only instead of speaking right away, Washington turns back to the camera and he holds the microphone in the air, grinning from ear to ear as the crowd continues to erupt in support of the Brooklyn native. He finally holds the microphone to his lips.



Leon Washington: YOU HEAR THAT, BABY?! CAUSE I SURE AS HELL DO! ( he holds the mic up again for another roar from the crowd ) It sounds like there's a couple thousand screamin' fans on their feet an showin' their love for Brooklyn's Finest! Nobody seems to understand...regardless of what anybody in the back might think of me or my boy Alex, it ain't about what they think! It's about the people who are here to see the best of the best do what they do! It's about these fans, the people who make our entire industry run! An for the folks who're apparently unable or unwillin' to understand this...lemme break it down for you right quick. REAL will always recognize REAL. An if you actually believe these fans have forgotten about Brooklyn's Finest, then you ain't doin' nothin' but blowin' smoke up your own ass! Cause everybody...EVERYBODY...they know why we're here, an why we're the ones takin' the Anzac Cup!

Washington lowers the microphone, grinning as the crowd continues to make noise. It was a stronger message than anything he could ever say and a major part of why he could rally the kind of support that he often did.

Leon Washington: Chianti...Alex Turner an Joey Morello...you're the last obstacle standin' between us an winnin' the whole damn thing. The only ones with a chance of provin' us wrong an showin' everybody why YOU'RE the real deal you claim to be! Y'all wanna talk shit...unfortunately, that ain't gonna get the job done. We've already heard three other teams talkin' shit about us but what do I hear once the smoke has cleared? ( he holds a hand up to his ear, listening to the crowd noise once again ) I hear an entire stadium of people makin' it clear, an entire stadium makin' it known that they're lookin' at the real deal right here! So miss me with that "you ain't a superstar" shit cause I've already heard it, an each team who said it? They've gone down at the hands of Brooklyn's Finest, baby. Every last one of 'em...

Washington continues to move back and forth on the ramp, his natural swagger in full effect as he points at the camera.

Leon Washington: Chianti? There's no delusions why you've made it as far as you have. You're a solid combination of raw talent an a constant desire to continue raisin' the bar as high as y'all can. An whether y'all had a difficult time gettin' to the finals or you had an easy one...EVERYTHIN' comes down to this one match. All our effort, all the trainin' we been through, all the sacrifices we've made in that ring, it's all on the line in this match. An no matter how you wanna look at it, this is winner take all. You say y'all have been in this position three times? Congratulations, cause that's definitely an accomplishment. An you can bet that everybody in this audience understands that. They understand, everythin' in this tournament has led to this one moment in time. An just like it has every other time y'all have made it to this point, this here's where the ride ends for you. Cause me an Alex might be comin' up on the brick wall, but y'all best believe we ain't slowin' down whatsoever...we're gonna put the pedal to the metal an we're gonna smash straight on through that bitch!

Washington throws a right hand straight at the camera as the words come pouring out, drawing another loud reaction from the crowd. Even the camera starts to move around, getting a closer look at the fans showing their love for Washington and Withers. But it soon returns...Washington's breathing heavily but there's a confident grin on his face as he lifts the mic again.

Leon Washington: I ain't pretendin' that this won't be difficult. Cause beatin' y'all is gonna take everythin' we've got. We didn't come here to end up in second place. My boy Alex? He believes second place is just the first loser, an it's hard to argue with that. Alex? He's consistent...somebody who ain't never had a problem backin' up his bad attitude. An the second y'all try an sleep on his 170 pounds? It's when everythin' you think you know flies straight out the window, an he drops your ass with that Detroit Death Drop. Cause he's been itchin' to score on somebody, especially knowin' the eyes of the wrestlin' world are gonna be locked on that ring. What better place to make a statement? An a success here means big things for whoever can get it. Chianti...you've always been a bridesmaid but never a bride. An unfortunately for y'all, it ain't about to change anytime soon cause we don't have any misconceptions about what it's gonna take to earn a victory here...

Another strong "WA-SHING-TON" chant starts to pick up steam and Washington doesn't hesitate to hold the microphone up to the audience to make absolutely certain their voices are heard. Washington grins again and starts shaking his head.

Leon Washington: Forgotten? Don't get it twisted. These people know exactly who I am. An when it's all over, I guarantee that y'all will too. Cause this is the finals of the Anzac Cup, that means come strapped or don't come at all. Cause there ain't no suckas at the top. Championships...they don't matter. Hall of Fames...they don't matter. The only thing that matters who is the BEST. An it's only takes three lil' seconds to find that out. 1-2-3 baby... ( he raises his fingers to count along ) We've put three teams down for the count but the best is still on the way. So it's time to get suited an booted, cause them XHW boys are about to get knee-deep in somebody's ass!

Washington drops the mic as his music hits, holding his arms outstretched as he turns around to look over the crowd. They roar loudly as he slowly turns back towards the camera, that confident stare ever present as the scene fades to black...

[SWAT Team]

🇨🇮-The second edition of The Whole F'N Show with Joey Morelli hits the XHF NETWORK airwaves, live, in New Zealand, during the Anzac Cup 2019 Tag Tournament. The ring has been made into a makeshift stage of how the show normally looks. In the middle of the ring is a red, white and green plush leather couch. Normally Joey would come out and greet the fans to kick off the show but since he is the guest someone else will be hosting. That someone is wearing a t-shirt that says, "Narrator" on the front and the Syndicate Wrestling And Tradition logo on the back, blue jeans and black shoes.-🇨🇮

Narrator: This is the Whole F'N Show with Joey Morelli! Normally, Joey would be here being the shit, on point, and always lit! But since he's the guest, tonight in this very ring..my guest will be the "Godson of SWAT".."The Modern Day Warrior".."The Man Who Made Who"..(Fans:"You!")..The Co-Owner of SWAT, The General Manager and soon to be COO of Shrouded Enigma Entertainment..Chianti's Own...JOOOOEYYYY MOORRRRREEELLI!

🇨🇮-"Who Made Who", by AC/DC rocks the stadium and out comes Joey Morelli to a chores of cheers. Morelli causally struts out wearing a tailored grey suit and a in style tie. Morelli takes his time getting to the ring. He steps through the ropes and hugs Narrator then gives him a kiss on each cheek. Narrator points to Joey ala Scott Hall style. Narrator hands Joey a mic.-🇨🇮

Narrator: Listen to this ovation!


Fans: Who made who? You! Who made who? You! Who made you? Joey!


[Joey smiles.]


Joey Morelli: Thanks everybody! Good to b e here on..well, my own show.


Fans: You are The Show..You are the Whole Show..You are the The Whole F'N Show so help you God!


[Joey laughs and claps.]


Narrator: Guess it's safe to say they love you right here in New Zealand!


[Narrator gives a thumbs up for a cheap pop.]


Joey Morelli: Seems like they like you here too.


Fans: NarraaaAtor!! *clap clap clap clap clap* NarraaaAtor!


Narrator: Go ahead...get it out of your system. By the end of this show ya'll will be booing the fuck out of me.


[Joey laughs.]


Joey Morrelli: Why's that?


Narrator: Because I won't dummy-down. I won't be that "politically correct" narrator these people and some of those blowhards in the back want me to be. I don't mix any words- if I say your a fucking asshole then guess what? Nine times out of ten..you are a fucking asshole. That's just the way it is.


[Joey plays into it.]


Joey Morelli: What about the other one?


Narrator: They are just assholes..Not fucking assholes.


[Joey laughs.]


Joey Morelli: Any blowhards in the back in particular? 


Narrator: Oh, I see. You want me to single somebody out. Not a problem..let's start with your opponents for the finals of this Anzac Cup 2019..Alex Withers and Leon Washington. First of all this Withers kid weighs what a buck..buck and a half soaking wet?


Joey Morelli: To be fair he did fairly well against the "Monster Amongst Men" Tarrasque, who out weighed him by a hundred and fifty pounds or more.


Narrator: Wow..he did good against Captain Caveman. That brainless fuck. Hey, Tarrasque? Oscar the Grouch called and said he wants his gimmick back. "Cookie monster need a cookie!" Get out of here with that shit. Tell me something..how the fuck do you get a BYE and LOSE the next round? Pathetic..and you know he doesn't have the nerve to stick around. One and done..(Shakes his head)


Joey Morelli: True. I feel bad for Frostbite..he picked a partner that has no control over himself. 


Narrator: Fuck Frostbite! The only thing cold running through his veins is the lack of knowing the English language. Butcher a promo much lately there, Frosty The No Man? He choked- he knows it and I know it..hell all these fans know it. But yet if I say it I'm an asshole. Funny how that shit works..isn't it?


Joey Morelli: I thought Frostbite was going to walk all over Withers and Washington..to be honest.


Narrator: We all did. I mean what makes this Withers and Washington so special anyways? Because Withers is from Detroit..or Leon is from Brooklyn? That's all they say every fucking promo. Funny you live in Brooklyn and I hadn't heard a peep about it until I just mentioned it. That's what separates you from them. Seriously..who the fuck cares where your from? I can see repping where you live but to the extent they do it is completely asinine..but what do you expect from two idiots from XYZ?


Joey Morelli: XYZ?


Narrator: You know..the silly little company they rep on a continual basis. Another one of those who fucking cares scenario. They go on and on about how Syndicate Wrestling And Tradition is nothing more than a comedy bit. Better than being boring as fuck. No doubt this Withers cat is a light foam, soybean milk, extra hot latte drinking moron and Washington? Pretty flashy dresser for someone from the "hood". Fucking wannabe. Leon you ain't hard. I bet you know the words to LL Cool J's "I Need Love"? Got that shit memorized just incase you need to spring up on some "rat" backstage. Admit it Leon..you're a panty-raider. You like any stupid bimbo that will fall for your lines about being from the hood. Too bad neither Candice or Roxy will fall for that shit.


Joey Morelli: Definitely not. I think people get the wrong idea about Roxylishus. 


Narrator: She's more than nice tits and a hot piece of ass?


[Joey laughs.]


Joey Morelli: I'm glad you said that and not me..but yes..you are completey right. It's all strategy by my tag team partner "Timeless" Alex Turner. Everything is strategic with that guy.


Narrator: Accept the dumb part. He is really is a dumb fuck.


Joey Morelli: I think he's smarter than people give him credit for. I mean he did agree to tag with me, didn't he? Smart move..look at us now. In the finals and I'm about to bring the cup to Shrouded Enigma Entertainment while he takes care of making sure things stay dominate for Chianti in SWAT. The best of both worlds.


Narrator: Well enough about me. Let's talk about you..I can go on all day about a team like Fairtex reminds me of a box of super absorbent Tampax..


[Joey laughs.]


Joey Morelli: okay, I have to admit. They do remind me of a box of women's personal hygiene. Just look how I get criticized for spending so much time with my family in my promos. Like family values is something to be ashamed of. I really don't care what anybody thinks. That is the Italian way. Even back in the Mafioso days..they did their dirt but were always home in the morning to eat breakfast with the kids. My boys and wife come first..even over the business. That's why I left SWAT in the first place. I wanted more time with them. I'm not EVER going to apologize for being a good father and husband. Question is..why are there not more like me?


Narrator: Because you are one of a kind..a lost breed in how society works these days. Guys like Washington and Withers only care about that spotlight. Face it, they only came here because they thought they were going to come in a run rough shot over the tag division and bring the Anzac Cup to XYZ. They thought it would be a cake walk. Only problem: Chianti ain't no "easy button". You can't just push it and boom here's your cup. You have to EARN that shit. That's the difference between SWAT and all the other cookie cutter, Fisher Price feds..we make you EARN what you get here. Withers call them the "Savior of Swat". Well guess what little guy? SWAT doesn't need saving. Now kindly shut the door on the way out. You came here not the other way around. We were doing just fine without you..and after you leave because of your finals loss, we will be doing what we always do. Put the asses in the seats and be the innovators of the pro wrestling world. Certainly just because Withers runs around calling him and Washington icons he doesn't think anybody buys into that shit. Can I smell what Withers is cooking? No, because the stench of statements like that overwhelm my sense of smell..or any common sense if you want to get down to the nitty-gritty. By the way..Roxylishus has a big titty..two actually. Damn, I can't help myself.


[Joey laughs his ass off.]


Joey Morelli: Hahaha..Really funny. You’re really funny.


Narrator: Waddya' mean I’m funny?


Joey Morelli: It’s funny, y’know, the…the story. It’s funny. You’re a funny guy.


Narrator: Waddya' mean? You mean the way I talk? What?


Joey Morelli: It's just, y’know, it’s..you’re just funny. It’s..you know, the way you tell the story and everything.


Narrator: Funny how? I mean, what’s funny about it?


Joey Morelli: Narrator, no, you got it all wrong..


[Narrator looks at Joey with a serious look on his face.]


Joey Morelli: Just, you know, you’re funny.


Narrator: You mean, let me understand this..cuz..maybe it’s me? Maybe I’m a little fucked up, maybe?


[Narrator stares into the eyes of Joey.]


Narrator: I’m funny how, I mean funny like I’m a clown? I amuse you?


[Joey looks at Narrator like are you joking or not.]


Narrator: Make you laugh? I’m here to fuckin’ amuse you? Waddya' mean “funny”? Funny how? How am I funny?


[Joey looks at Narrator nervously.]


Joey Morelli: I don’t know, just…you know, how you tell the story. What?


Narrator: No, no I don’t know.


[Narrator stares a hole through Joey.]


Narrator: You said it. How do I know? You said I’m funny. How the fuck am I funny? What the fuck is so funny about me? Tell me. Tell me what’s funny.


[Long silence]


[Longer silence]

[Longest silence]


Joey Morelli: (Laughing) Get the fuck outta here, Narrator. Narrator.


Narrator: Ya' motherfucker, I almost had you! I almost had you! You stuttering prick here! And...end scene!


Fans: We love Pesci! We love Pesci! We love Pesci!


Joey Morelli: We all do. You almost had me fooled, Nar!


[Narrator laughs.]


Narrator: I had you! You almost shit your pants!


Joey Morelli: Nah, it would take a lot to get me to crap my pants. I'm a father of two seven year old boys..twins infact..so I've seen some scary scary stuff. 


Narrator: Very true..I forgot about little Twin #1 and Twin #2..They are at they age. I think they are both already bigger than Withers. Not Leon Washington though. He is a pretty big dude.


Joey Morelli: Yeah he is, but "Timeless" is a pretty big boy himself. He's no slouch. Don't sleep on the big man!


Narrator: I wouldn't recommend that. Roxy has a jealous streak that is not so lishus but a whole lotta' vicious! Look Leon..am I vibing with you "G"? You ain't from the streets and even if you were..so what? Big deal. Get over yourself, kid, thinking you have some kind of home field advantage because you are from the "mean" streets of Brooklyn would be a HUGE mistake. Not in this match. That's off the table..it is now null and void. 


Joey Morelli: I guess I'll close shooting from the hip like Withers tried to do. Nice attempt but let a real pro take it from here. Must you talk about your Hall of Fames every time they put a Mic in your fuckin' face? Of course you do..you don't know any better..Answer me that little engine that could..or in this case that couldn't..It's time to bring that cup home where it belongs. Don't mistake our hospitality for weakness. You are the outsiders in this equation. We are the home team. 


Repetitive..humdrum..boring..tiresome..mind-numbing. Yep..you guessed it..another Withers promo. Repeating himself and using the same material over and over must be a fit in XYZ. It was a valiant attempt but..not good enough. You and Washington got owned this cycle of promos..


Always remember and never forget..this is the show..the WHOLE show and nothing but the WHOLE F'N Show so help me God!


Game.


Set.


Match.


You lose..suck it up buttercup!


[Show closes to a handpicked song by Joey and his now famous around the world logo.]

[SWAT Team]

Frank Salazar : Ladies and Gentlemen, the following contest is a tag team match scheduled for ONE fall, and is the MAIN EVENT OF THE EVENING!! Introducing first coming in at a combined weight of 497 lbs .... accompanied by Candice Morelli and Roxylishus!!!! TIMELESS ALEX TURNER ..... THE GODSON OF SWAT JOEY MORELLI....CHIANTI!!!!

[Sfera Ebbasta - Tran Tran hits and Candice and Roxylishus make their way out to the rampway, they look so hot you wish you had two eyes so you could look at both, make that four eyes you want, and a tub of baby oil. They pose together and the fans go wild, then Joey and Timeless come out between them, high five and the four make their way to the ring, Roxylishus stops to banter with a fan, then mock wretches with her finger in her mouth gagging and dismisses them. The girls hold the ropes open for Timeless and Joey and Timeless grabs the mic from Frank.]

Timeless : I got passion in my pants and I ain't afraid to show it!

Joey : (grabbing the mic) I’m Sexy and I know it!

[Timeless tells him, no, he is, and they bicker at who is the sexiest as they await their opponents.]

[My Own Summer begins to play across the PA system and after a short delay out walks Alex Withers, dressed with a black zip up hoody lifted over his head, simple black boots and trunks he walks with a purpose towards the ring. Sliding under the bottom rope he heads towards his corner without even a look towards the camera. Rubbing at each wrist he waits until the last possible moment to take his top off and bounces on the balls of his feet, glaring at the convicted and awaiting his tag team partner.]

Frank Salazar : And their opponents .... firstly ... Coming in at 6’ and 170 pounds ... hailing from Lansing, Detroit, Michigan. ALEX WITHERS!!!! And his tag team partner, hailing from Brooklyn, New York, coming in at 6’5 & 242 lbs .... LEON WASHINGTON!!!!

[The sirens go off and the fans immediately rise to their feet as the arena lights switch to a series of swirling blues and whites. Seconds later, Washington comes out through the curtains and onto the stage, running to one side to get the fans all fired up before doing it again on the other side. He then plays to camera...continuously working the crowd and slapping hands on his way down the ramp, before he breaks into a sprint near the bottom and slides into the ring. The spotlights focus on one of the turnbuckles, while the blue lights continue to swirl about and Washington climbs the turnbuckle and throws a fist high into the air. The crowd reacts as thousands of flashes go off, while Washington tosses his cap out into the crowd then pulls off his jersey and flings it out the other side. He turns and drops down into the ring, getting limbered up as he awaits the sound of the bell.][/i]

Jeremy Tucker : This is it Fulton, this is one is for all the marbles!

Andrew Fulton : You’ve lost your marbles if you think that cup is going anywhere except Chianti! No way, no how we let some upstarts waltz in here and take our Cup.

Jeremy Tucker : These Upstarts have been tremendous thru the whole tourney, i hope they DO win it and take it home.

Andrew Fulton : You would.

Jeremy Tucker : Ref calls for the bell and Timeless and Withers are in there starting it out, and this is somewhat of a mismatch. Timeless is towering over Withers, and he holds his hands high in the air challenging Withers to a test of strength.

Andrew Fulton : He is quite skinny, actually, he is a damn rake, look at Timeless egging him on to go for the test of strength.

Jeremy Tucker : Withers accepts and holds his hand up and Timeless clutches it and squeezes tightly, that is his mechanical hand and this is totally unfair.

Andrew Fulton : Withers is crazy to accept the test to begin with, tap out right now and run off back to where you came from!

Jeremy Tucker : Withers jumps in the air and does a kind of spin and lands on his feet with Timeless’s arm all twisted up and pressing the pressure on it. Wow!

Andrew Fulton : Man, he is fast. Withers torques on the arm lock and Timeless winces in pain then powers Withers into his corner, and Joey clocks Withers in the back of the head, forcing him to break the hold! Great tag team wrestling!

Jeremy Tucker : Timeless with a hard chop to the chest of Withers, and you could hear that in the cheap seats!

Andrew Fulton : Timeless tags Joey in and Joey with a hard knee to the gut of Withers who was prone being held by Timeless.

Jeremy Tucker : Joey delivers a series of piston like right hands.

Andrew Fulton : Uppercut by Joey, whips Withers into the ropes.

Jeremy Tucker : SPEAR! Spear by Withers to Joey!

Andrew Fulton : Withers tags in Washington. Double headbutt on Joey.

Jeremy Tucker : Washington with a Samoan drop on Joey.

Andrew Fulton : Washington goes for a reverse atomic drop, but Joey blocks it with a crushing headbutt of his own to the nose of Washington! Blood is gushing out of the nose, i think he broke it Jerry!

Jeremy Tucker : Joey hooks him, and plants him with a big belly to belly suplex, then tags in Timeless. Washington back to his feet, and both Timeless and Joey run the ropes and hit simultaneous clotheslines, one to the front one to the back.

Andrew Fulton : Timeless then delivers an arm drag. He is the king of the arm drag!

Jeremy Tucker : T Bone suplex from Timeless!

Andrew Fulton : Reverse chin lock, facing Withers and taunting him.

Jeremy Tucker : Withers runs in the ring and superkicks the seated Timeless breaking the chin lock, he asked for that Fulton.

Andrew Fulton : Joey runs in the ring and swings some heavy left hands at Withers.

Jeremy Tucker : This one is breaking loose! All four men now duking it out!

Andrew Fulton : Timeless with a DDT on Withers!

Jeremy Tucker : Washington hooks Timeless and plants him with a throwback neck breaker.

Andrew Fulton : Joey with a spinning heel kick on Leon Washington.

Jeremy Tucker : Move for move in here, Alex Withers grabs Joey and drills him with a short arm clothesline.

Andrew Fulton : Timeless with a Fisherman bomb on Withers!

Jeremy Tucker : These four are trading big impact moves! One team will have to give!

Andrew Fulton : Washington with a HUGE wheel barrow facebuster on Timeless!

Jeremy Tucker : WHAM! Joey just picks up Leon Washington and drills him with a devastating Death Valley Driver!

Andrew Fulton : Man o Man! That could be it .... Joey covers ....

Jeremy Tucker : One ..............

Two .................

Withers breaks the count with a crazy diving head butt from the top rope! Unbelievabe!

Andrew Fulton : Timeless seizes on the prone Withers ... FALCON ARROW!!!

Jeremy Tucker : Nailed it! He is a technical master and strong as an ox! Withers looks like he is DEAD! Cover by Timeless, hooks the leg ....

One ......................

Two ...................... Leon breaks the count.

Andrew Fulton : Leon with a Spin out reverse powerbomb on Timeless!

Jeremy Tucker : Timeless, is lifeless! Cover by Leon ....

One ........................

Two .................... Joey breaks the count. Referee letting this go into a tornado tag match, no holding back here in SWAT, especially in the main event of the Anzac Cup baby!

Andrew Fulton : Joey hooks Leon ....

Jeremy Tucker : Italian Basil Leaf (Sharp Shooter). ITALIAN BASIL LEAF!!!!

Andrew Fulton : Washington reaching in desperation for the ropes, but Joey has him in the centre of the ring .....

Jeremy Tucker : Alex breaks the hold, crunching Joey and then locks on a submission of his own .... CHICKEN WING!!!

Andrew Fulton : Joey tries to counter the chicken wing, and Timeless makes the save ... locking on the Rings of Saturn!!!!

Jeremy Tucker : TURN ME LOOSE!! Timeless with the Turn Me Loose on Alex!!!

Andrew Fulton : Leon Washington goes to break the submission .... JOE KO!!!

Jeremy Tucker : JOEY MORELLI JUST NAILED LEON WITH THE JOE KO!!! Covers him!! Alex Withers howling in pain in the Turn Me Loose. Ref drops for the count.

One ...............................

Two ............................

THREEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!

Andrew Fulton : CHIANTI WIN!!! CHIANTI WINNNNNN!!!!

Jeremy Tucker : What an achievement, hats off too Joey and Timeless.

[Sfera Ebbasta - Tran Tran hits and Candice and Roxylishus jump in the ring celebrating with Chianti.]

Andrew Fulton : Told ya they would win it all Jerry!

Jeremy Tucker : You picked half the freaken field.

Andrew Fulton : It doesn’t matter how many rejections you get in the club, as long as you take someone home.

Jeremy Tucker : What?

Andrew Fulton : Just saying, i got it right, just like i get laid.

Jeremy Tucker : Shut up! The ref is handed the Anzac Cup and he presents it too Timeless and Joey as their music still blares thru the arena.

Frank Salazar : WINNERS OF THE MATCH, AND 2019 ANZAC CUP WINNERS .... JOEY MORELLI .... TIMELESS ALEX TURNER ..... CHIANTI!!!!!

Andrew Fulton : Congrats to Chianti!! Boy o Boy, Uncle Joe knew what he was doing when he teamed these two up together.

Jeremy Tucker : Future Timeless says it’s only the beginning of much bigger things to come.

Andrew Fulton : Look at them celebrating, they are over the moon.

Jeremy Tucker : Cudo’s also to Alex and Leon, they came here outsiders and strangers and took it too all, only just falling short to the very best we have to offer, they can hold their heads high.

Andrew Fulton : See you losers at Battle Ground Jokers Wild! I’m going to party with Chianti!!!

Jeremy Tucker : Folks, for SWAT, i am Jeremy Tucker, thanks for joining us here tonight and we hope to see you again in our future programming, which you can all catch live on the XHF Network.

[Scene fades Joey and Timeless holding the Cup in the air.]