Post by Dave D-Flipz on Dec 13, 2020 1:55:56 GMT -5
*The scene opens with the camera man trudging into a locker room somewhere in Canada. Trudging because the room is just … just overflowing with sand. Ok not literally but it makes for a slippery walk where dry and then a sticky one where wet. Wait wet? As the camera moves in we find we are into the shower area of the room. Suddenly as the camera moves through the steam we hear the water flowing hard. And we stumble upon cousin It from the Addams Family! OH LORDY –oh … no it’s … it’s a wrestler … who appears to have 10 pounds of hair just caked to his body from the wetness.*
: "I admit … this isn’t something you usually see! But you see all the sand from those sandbags over there really made my hair itch to the point of intrusion on my lifestyle."
*Sure enough there are open spilling sandbags in the corner of the room labeled “Dave D-Flipz’s December Roleplaying” … how odd.*
: "Though I question if Mongo or Gus Arnold pays you XHF/NPW camera guys enough to be here. I mean … isn’t nudity frowned upon?"
*The camera guy stops … he looks down … it’s ok there’s so much body hair Primal may as well be in a furry costume from one of Kira’s closets.*
: "It’s ok. If we were free as we should be clothes would be a non-issue. I’m plenty warm in this great north with just my true self. And I find I can have better matches, more fun, if my opponent can get within 2 feet of me. So I chose to save both of us and clean up for the occasion. After all, this is a black tie affair!"
*Primal grabs into his chest hair and shuffles a black necktie out from his … fur …*
: "I admit punning is not my usual domain but to be so formal as to shower required my opponent’s nom de knot. Nicholas we met in the rumble, it was a quick affair, not very impressive. But that is where Crowning of a Champion comes in. See I am not here for titles, or accolades. I’m here because punishing fools is fun. And I live for my creed. Civilization holds people back. Those who follow their basic instincts live better lives. Taking what they want and doing what they want. Obeying the needs of the body and mind as they come. And you Nicholas are no example of living the human life. Pompous, born with a silver spoon in your mouth, hiding behind pomp and circumstance. It’s disgusting. While I am wholesome and honest."
*He brushes through his massive matted hair on his stomach with a loofah … it quickly begins to shred and accumulate tangled mats of hair from months of buildup of grime and damage. And yet there is still more hair underneath it. And a corn dog falls out onto the shower floor.*
: "… Are you going to eat that? …. I’ll just save it for later. Clearly Mr. Windsor I am a higher level of human. Men like me don’t wait for people to allow us to take what we want. Men like me … and my good friend Bradley Swann … and now that I think about it Eric Dane and Scott Steel. We are cut from a different cloth, unchained by the rules of society. I admit I may actually like those three. An unusual thing indeed!"
*He begins to clean closer to his no-no area. It’s like he has no shame. Oh … oh right.*
: "And so this event sees you matched up with me. And with a message to be sent I think you’ll find I’m less inclined to allow you to get a win over me than I was the last two shows. See, the thrill of beating down the weak who use society as a crutch was too good to pass up in the tag matches. And the mayhem of a rumble was its own reward. But now … I feel like I want a victory. So I will take it. You can try and get a hold of my limbs but … good luck following the rules of no hair pulling! You can try to overpower me but … we both know an animal like me is too much for a blueblood bitch like yourself. No, this time the mask you wear over your true humanity will be tossed asunder as I show you the benefits of the Primal lifestyle."
*The camera moves up and puts his crotch out of shot as he moves the hair out of the way to clean*
: "And as it turns out Scott and Eric showed me something else I want. So I aim to take it. A War Hound. They have two and a possum. I have decided I want one … so I have to pay someone a visit."
*We open up again some time later outside of a Canadian hotel room. We hear the resident inside talking to what sounds like a group. A WOO! Is heard. Primal appears as we hear the meeting end. He BANGS on the door with enough force to dent it.*
: "Oh mister fake dark lord? Edge Lord Supreme? DOMINICUS! … It’s time to pay the Primal tax, present me my war hound or I will see to it you never eat solid food again! I know a mall santa who I can easily convince to help take what’s rightfully mine!"
*Fade out*
: "I admit … this isn’t something you usually see! But you see all the sand from those sandbags over there really made my hair itch to the point of intrusion on my lifestyle."*Sure enough there are open spilling sandbags in the corner of the room labeled “Dave D-Flipz’s December Roleplaying” … how odd.*
: "Though I question if Mongo or Gus Arnold pays you XHF/NPW camera guys enough to be here. I mean … isn’t nudity frowned upon?"*The camera guy stops … he looks down … it’s ok there’s so much body hair Primal may as well be in a furry costume from one of Kira’s closets.*
: "It’s ok. If we were free as we should be clothes would be a non-issue. I’m plenty warm in this great north with just my true self. And I find I can have better matches, more fun, if my opponent can get within 2 feet of me. So I chose to save both of us and clean up for the occasion. After all, this is a black tie affair!"*Primal grabs into his chest hair and shuffles a black necktie out from his … fur …*
: "I admit punning is not my usual domain but to be so formal as to shower required my opponent’s nom de knot. Nicholas we met in the rumble, it was a quick affair, not very impressive. But that is where Crowning of a Champion comes in. See I am not here for titles, or accolades. I’m here because punishing fools is fun. And I live for my creed. Civilization holds people back. Those who follow their basic instincts live better lives. Taking what they want and doing what they want. Obeying the needs of the body and mind as they come. And you Nicholas are no example of living the human life. Pompous, born with a silver spoon in your mouth, hiding behind pomp and circumstance. It’s disgusting. While I am wholesome and honest."*He brushes through his massive matted hair on his stomach with a loofah … it quickly begins to shred and accumulate tangled mats of hair from months of buildup of grime and damage. And yet there is still more hair underneath it. And a corn dog falls out onto the shower floor.*
: "… Are you going to eat that? …. I’ll just save it for later. Clearly Mr. Windsor I am a higher level of human. Men like me don’t wait for people to allow us to take what we want. Men like me … and my good friend Bradley Swann … and now that I think about it Eric Dane and Scott Steel. We are cut from a different cloth, unchained by the rules of society. I admit I may actually like those three. An unusual thing indeed!"*He begins to clean closer to his no-no area. It’s like he has no shame. Oh … oh right.*
: "And so this event sees you matched up with me. And with a message to be sent I think you’ll find I’m less inclined to allow you to get a win over me than I was the last two shows. See, the thrill of beating down the weak who use society as a crutch was too good to pass up in the tag matches. And the mayhem of a rumble was its own reward. But now … I feel like I want a victory. So I will take it. You can try and get a hold of my limbs but … good luck following the rules of no hair pulling! You can try to overpower me but … we both know an animal like me is too much for a blueblood bitch like yourself. No, this time the mask you wear over your true humanity will be tossed asunder as I show you the benefits of the Primal lifestyle."*The camera moves up and puts his crotch out of shot as he moves the hair out of the way to clean*
: "And as it turns out Scott and Eric showed me something else I want. So I aim to take it. A War Hound. They have two and a possum. I have decided I want one … so I have to pay someone a visit."*We open up again some time later outside of a Canadian hotel room. We hear the resident inside talking to what sounds like a group. A WOO! Is heard. Primal appears as we hear the meeting end. He BANGS on the door with enough force to dent it.*
: "Oh mister fake dark lord? Edge Lord Supreme? DOMINICUS! … It’s time to pay the Primal tax, present me my war hound or I will see to it you never eat solid food again! I know a mall santa who I can easily convince to help take what’s rightfully mine!"*Fade out*
