Anzac Cup 2021 (Show)

[Oh-Oh]

(The back hallways of the arena are packed with media types looking to get a few words with the roster as they prepare to do battle in the Anzac Cup. All heads turn when the backdoor opens, and the stage hands all begin to stare.)

[Oxford Osland.]

[Dangerous Donna.]

(As previously reported, the duo agreed to show up together tonight for one of the biggest events of the year. The stares would be uncomfortable for most, but not for Osland - this is something he's come to expect. Donna on the other hand, is still dealing with some of the backlash she received after what happened in Commissioner Valentine's office a few months ago. Osland senses she's a little uneasy, and grabs her hand. Donna looks up and Osland walks forward confidently.)

Osland: "Go ahead paparazzi, snap away."

(The comment turns everyone off, as the majority go back to do doing what they were doing prior to their arrival.)

Osland: "Was it something I said?"

Donna: "I could feel them all... staring...judging...."

Osland: "You're with me tonight. You don't have to worry about anything."

(Somehow Osland's words seem to have calmed her anxiety.)

Osland: "Shoulders back, Chest Out. Tonight, we own this building."

(Their hands clasp together tightly.)

(Off in the distance, Osland makes eye contact with the NEW SWAT World Heavyweight Champion; Eddie D. Osland smiles, hoping Eddie would return the favour. Instead, Eddie either hasn't noticed them, or is playing it off like he hasn't.)

Osland: "Look, there's Eddie. Let's go say hello."

Donna: "Do we have to? My last interaction with him didn't go very well."

Osland: "Listen, I have a feeling that Eddie is going to want to thank yours truly for helping him get into the right state of mind. The confidence that our conversation brought to the forefront is blatantly obvious."

Donna: "Alright, I'll make the best of it."

(The power couple walk towards the biggest and strongest man on the SWAT Roster. )

Osland: "How's it going, Champ?"

(Osland smiles, waiting for Eddie to respond. Eddie finally acknowledges the pair. There’s an initial glint of embarrassment as his eyes meet Donna’s and a glimmer of embarrassment that he went to Osland for dating advice… then he slaps the world title on his shoulder and he seems to physically swell with confidence.)

Eddie: “Pretty darned good. It’s great to hold the gold, but it’s even better to get a girlfriend?!”

Osland: “Get the heck out of here?! Which toothless blind hag took a look at you and said to herself… ‘I guess you’ll have to do for a Friday’ ha ha…”

Eddie: “Fuck you Osland and Thank you Osland in equal measure…”

Donna: “Thank you? You’ve changed. He just insulted you and your girlfriend Eddie… I thought you would have lashed out at him or something?"

Osland: “Maybe don’t suggest any ‘lashing out’ of any-kind, especially from The World Champ before this big tourney?”

Eddie: “You didn’t see the segment at the start of the last show?”

Donna: “I missed it? Sounds like a missed something important?”

Eddie: “So you didn’t tell her then? About our meeting?”

Osland: “I’m a man of my word Eddie; if it hadn’t been broadcast over SWAT that would have all been off the record.”

(Eddie nods respectfully, shrugs and turns to Donna.)

Eddie: “Osland gave me some advice about women at the top of the last show. Roxylishus is playing cupid and has been encouraging me to call a young lady called Trixie and I said I would call her if I won the title.”

Osland: “I bet you subconsciously thought that you wouldn’t have to call her if you put such a high bar of a barrier to calling her… because you weren’t thinking you were gonna win that belt. Tell me I’m wrong.”

(Eddie looks as though he started to take offense and his demeanour is changing to be more hostile, but he manages to keep his cool.)

Eddie: “Goth is a mean hombre, but I never doubted myself… You’re wrong”

Osland: “I guess you’ll be holding that title against all comers right?”

Eddie: “I can neither confirm nor deny who my first title defence will be against, or when that will be.”

Osland: “When that will be? So you’re not setting out your stall as a “fighting” champion?”

Eddie: “It took me a year to get this strap; I’m not in a rush to have the shortest title run in SWAT history.”

Osland: “You really are a quandary. You take my advice and get a girlfriend. You claim confidence that you were going to win the cold… but that confidence doesn’t carry to holding the belt for any amount of time?”

Eddie: “Look… You aren’t the champ, you aren’t the reason I got the courage to speak to Trixie, and you aren’t as special as you think you are. You are however, a Revenant, a con man and a dirty Casanova…”

Osland: “You say that as if you aren’t jealous of my charisma.”

Eddie: “Jealous of you?”

Osland: “You can call me a dirty Casanova, but you know that it’s you that has the bad reputation… because I never slapped a woman on the pussy on live TV did I!”

(Eddie bristles and raises his fist in anger, but Donna forces herself between the two men. Donna is about to say something but Eddie manages to catch himself stares hatefully at Osland for a moment and storms off.)

Osland: "That big lug is lucky he caught me in a good mood. We're on our best behaviour tonight."

(Donna looks up to Osland, trying to get a sense as to whether his bravado was honest or not.)

Donna: "Something tells me that...."

[...]

"OX! OX! OX!! Over here... Osland..."

(The sound of a females voice interrupts their conversation.) 

[Vanessa Martinez.]

(Vanessa walks right up to Osland and steps in between him and Donna. Whether she meant to or not, Vanessa completely ignores Donna's existence.)

Vanessa: "Come with me...Jeff Noon and I were able to secure a private interview for you and Keith."

(Vanessa grabs Osland by the arm, and drags him away from Donna without even acknowledging her.  Osland looks back to make eye contact, but it's clear that Vanessa is both embarrassed and annoyed. She turns her back to Osland's eye contact and pretends that it doesn't bother her.)

(But it does...)

(Osland knew he had media obligations to attend to, and a spark plug of an agent who was intent on guiding his career to the very top. Duty calls, he thought to himself and in the back of his mind hoping that Donna would realize that he was a big draw and have her attraction to him grow further. Either that, or this was just another way for her to pullback and ghost him for the next month like she had done previously.)

To Be Continued...

 

[thecomedian]

<Fade in to "The Golden God" Rally Jackson with tears in his eyes.  What is it?  Is he devastated about his tag match loss denying him tag team momentum before the Anzac Cup tournament?>

Rally Jackson:  They've gone too far.

<We pan out a bit and Rally is revealed to be on his knees.  Is the weight of two straight losses a burden he is struggling to carry?>

Rally Jackson:  As much as I try, it is never enough.  It will never be enough.  I am only one *they*, I can't do it all.

<That's it, he felt Combatilorean wasn't holding his own in the tag match.  But wait, we pan out further and he is on his knees outside of Oxford Osland's condo.>

Rally Jackson:  ::sniffling::  Look at this place.  It is not energy efficient.  It's not environmentally friendly.  I can't do this myself.  I can't save the planet myself from the comfort of my *green* safe space.

<Rally starts walking onto the property.>

Rally Jackson:  Look at this.  

<Rally points at the roof.>

Rally Jackson:  No solar paneling.  What is he some sort of neanderthal using traditional electricity?  You make me sick, Ox.  

Follow me.

<The camera follows Rally to Osland's parking lot.>

Rally Jackson:  Yup, you guessed it.  Gas guzzler.  Where is your tesla?  When I'm not riding my bicycle, which is often since I'm not in the shape I used to be, I drive an electric car.  Because I care about others.  I am woke.  My carbon footprint is non-existent.  This is the type of car that will singlehandedly heat the planet and cause mother earth to melt like the nazis in Raiders of the Lost Ark.

Keep following me, it gets worse.  

<Rally walks over to a garbage bag.>

Rally Jackson:  Got this out of Oxford's trash.

Plastic straws.

Plastic bags.

Plastic water bottles.

::Rally pulls out one more thing::

Plane tickets.

You fly?  You get in an actual airplane and use THAT to take you from show to show?  Do you not realize what you are doing to this planet?  Do you not care what you leave behind for your children and grandchildren?  Between gases and water vapor trails, this is the most damaging way to travel for the climate.

Me?  I let Bryan Gord.... I mean El Combatilorean drive me from show to show on a rickshaw.  Because I care.  Shame on you.  Shame shame shame.

What else do we have here?

::Pulls out t-bones::

Steak?  STEAK????  Do you know how much carbon is emitted by the production of meat?  Not to mention all the land it takes up to sustain itself.  It is driving deforestation in the Amazon you selfish prick.  Eat vegan meats or cancel yourself.

Between you and Keith, the amount of product you put on must kill a dozen moose.  Those suits you all wear I doubt are made of hemp.  I'm sure they are in fact produced in sweatshops.  I hope you're happy.  I hope you sleep well knowing someone was probably paid in peanuts so you all can look nice.

The two of you represent everything that is wrong with the patriarchy.  Your privilege has given you all your materialistic possessions.  While I put in the work, you unravel everything I do.  You...

<Rally is interrupted by El Combatilorean.>

Rally Jackson:  Did you find anymore evidence to help in our mission of accountability culture?

El Combatilorean:  No, I had to go to the bathroom.  I used this dudes condo.  Did you know he has a bidet?

Rally Jackson:  All rooms are bathrooms.  

<Fade.>

[Donzig]

Donzig glared around the empty hallway in the bowels of the arena, sneering around him as his hand dragged through his beard. He was restless, and he muttered to himself before a loud tone filled the air. He blinked, and pulled the phone from his pocket before he swiped it open. He stared at the screen, and then shook his head before stuffing it back into his battered leather jacket. 'What does Keith mean what was I thinking?'

He said nothing further, and then he saw Sinclair fairly dragging Warren Webber behind her. She was fuming, and said nothing as she shoved him forward. Donzig grunted, glad to see some fight in his partner as he glared at Webber. Sinclair folded her arms over her chest, and leaned back against the wall with a strange expression on her face. Was she pouting? Donzig hissed, shoving the thought away as he glared down at Webber. 'Do you know Fox McCloud and Falco Lombardi have dared to insult me?'

Webber blinked, and looked around nervously as Sinclair clearly tried to hold back her laughter. 'What?'

'Not as clever as the cute girl, eh? I didn't see that coming.' Donzig muttered, and then he jabbed an angry finger at Webber. 'I don't care if Big Momma the Owl, Dinky the Finch, and that fucking Boomer took Tod to the Widow Tweed! And I don't care if he married Copper! This fucking tournament doesn't have a happy ending for the Fox and the Hound, yeah? Tonight? The goddamned bear wins! Do you get that?'

Webber blinked, and Sinclair looked away as Donzig tilted his head. Webber cleared his throat, and then shrugged. 'Do you ever think that your need to mock your opponents is a sign of the fact that your arrogance is just a cover for deep-seated insecurities?'

The hall become very silent, and Sinclair stared with suddenly wide eyes. Donzig's face twitched, and then he whispered a reply. 'What?'

Webber flinched, and took a step back. But Donzig grabbed him by the lapels, and lifted him from the floor before driving him into the wall with a snarl. He leaned close, eyes narrowed as his teeth were bared as he yelled. 'Oh, you want the old shit? Is that it? You want to get real?'

Webber gurgled, and Sinclair frowned as she reached forward to try and calm him. Donzig shook her off, and his face pressed closer to Webber again. 'Fine! Fucking Bloodied Fox and Brendan walked into SWAT, they walked into my house, and then they presume to tell me! Me! How awesome they are? I don't care how awesome they are, I don't care at all! Because at the end of the day? We're all dead men, we're all going down into the cold dead earth! And the Void doesn't give two flying fucks how awesome you were! It doesn't care how happy you are with your husband, or if you are going to lose two first round matches in a goddamned row at the Anzac Cup! But, but, but Webber! I fucking do care about how they presume to speak to me!'

Donzig took a deep breath, and he patted Webber's shoulder before he smoothed his lapel. 'The blood that covers the fox is seldom his own? Good, I don't mind a little blood, even if it is my own! But I am not going to let anyone or anything get between Devon and I! I am not going to rest until I hold that Anzac Cup in my hands, and if it has a little of my blood on it? All the fucking better! Because I will look down at Devon and Fox, and their partners? And they will know that they are as nothing before the Herald of Oblivion! Nothing!'

Donzig stepped back, and Webber caught his breath before he moved away from the wall. A hand lifting to his neck, and he took a calming breath. Then Donzig grabbed him again, pushing him to his knees. His hands snaked upwards, and his fingers pried his eyes wide open as he hissed in his ear. Forcing Webber to look ahead as he snarled. 'Do you see it! Do you see it? WEBBER, DO YOU SEE IT? The darkness? The fucking future coming for us all? Do you! Look at it! Because that is what they have to look forward to!'

Donzig released him again, and stalked off down the hall with a snarl. He shook his head, glancing back at the still pouting Sinclair before his phone beeped again. He paused, and reached into his pocket with a mutter. 'Double O? What does he want?'

Donzig stared at the phone, a brow arching as he walked further. 'You shouldn't have said that? I should apologize to her? For what?'

Clearly, Double O knew Donzig or he was watching the show because the phone beeped again. Donzig tilted his head, scanning the screen again. 'Oh.'

Donzig shoved the phone into his pocket, and a hand lifted as he spun around to look at Sinclair. She jerked to a halt, staring at him with surprise before he licked his lips. He took a deep breath, and then he muttered. 'Sorry for earlier, Sinclair. You know you--' Donzig paused, something flickered across his face before he grunted. '--you know.'

A smile tugged at her lips, and she nodded before Donzig turned around to stalk down the hall once more with a wave of his hand. 'Let's go get ready for Tod and Falco Lombardi. And I hope you locked up the house, I don't want Rally in my garbage.'

[SWAT Team]

Frank Salazar : The following is the first match of the Anzac Cup Tournament! In the ring at this time, weighing in at 647lbs, representing the KGB, Hehe and Haha!

Jeremy Tucker : I think we can agree that nobody expects Hehe and Haha to go all the way in the Anzac Cup, but you can guarantee they are under orders to take out, or slow down as many of their opponents as possible tonight!

Andrew Fulton :

Frank Salazar : Now on their way to the ring, at a combined weight of 375lbs, the team of Union Jack and Pequeño Dinosaurio.... Bear-O-Dactyl!

As the ring announcer finishes up, a booming voice from nowhere fills the arena, like an excited chihuahua with no social filter, the unseen speaker tries to sound tough despite the like a childlike inflection to his voice.

Lil' MC : Yo! Yo! Yo! You 'bout to witness a Mother Fucking Origin Story, let's go!

The house light's dim as 'The Motherfucking Pterodactyl' by Sarah Donner and The Oatmeal starts to play. Fans, especially the younger ones, begin clapping along to the silly, but infectious beat of the song. Spotlights pan across the crowd and strobe lights fill the arena.

He is the Motherfucking Pterodactyl
Here to
Ptear you a nnnnnneeeeewww... asshole

The spotlights settle on the stage as Union Jack and Pequeño Dinosaurio burst through the curtain to an explosion of green, blue and red pyro.

Jeremy Tucker : Well, I guess Bear-O-Dactyl have got themselves a new entrance song!

Lil' MC follows Jack and Dinosaurio out through the curtain and excitedly does a lap of the stage, stopping in both corners to rhythmically thrust his hips and shake his little rubber penis toward the crowd.

Yes, it's true
He ate 10,000 lightning bugs
Kissing his bowels like a million hugs
He shat them oooouuuuut
One phosphorescent night
Painting it like
Christmas liiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigggghhhts

Jack is hyping up his partner, whipping the crowd into a frenzy.

Andrew Fulton : And what an Entrance song it is!

The small bear drops to his knees and skids across the stage, stopping right in front of the ramp before the Luchadors.

He is the Motherfucking Pterodactyl
Here to
Ptear you a nnnnnneeeeewww... asshole

He pops up to his feet and starts furiously strumming the plastic penis that hangs from the front of his costume, the sound of the little bell amplified by the megaphone he is holding close to his crotch.

Yes, it's true
His plumage is the best in town
All the hoooeees
Touch his sexy Pteroid bone, oh!
Yes he do put the T-rex to shame
His pussy arms on that
Puuuuusssssy frrrrraaaaame
Oh!

Both Union Jack and Pequeño Dinosaurio rush forward and leap over Lil' MC. Jack performs a split leg jump, while Dinosaurio dives under Jack's legs but over Lil' MC's head.

He is the Motherfucking Pterodactyl
Here to
Ptear you a nnnnnneeeeewww... asshole

Dinosaurio lands a split second before Jack, rolling once to clear the shared landing spot just as Jack sticks the landing where his partner had been.

Yes, it's true
He enjoys his hobbies too
He smokes his pipe
Rollerblades and finds ladies to woo, oh!

The two members of Bear-O-dactyl sprint down the ramp toward the ring with Lil' MC following as fast as he can.

Yes, it's true
He rode with the Triassic crew
That includes Lystrosaurus, and Plateosaurus, toooooo
Ooh, ooh, ooh

Reaching the ring, both men leap from the floor to the ring apron before bounding over the top rope to enter the ring.

He is the Motherfucking Pterodactyl
Here to
Ptear you a nnnnnneeeeewww... asshole

Both men go to opposite corners, posing for the loudly cheering crowd and hit all for corners in turn, playing up to the raucous reaction.

He is awkward on the floor
His feet are shit and
His balance quite poor

Lil MC rounds the outside, high-fiving anyone willing to reach out a hand.

He hooked up with a grizzly bear
They made love under the sea, and everrryyyyywhere

Andrew Fulton : Wait... Did that just say what I think it said?!

Yes that bear gave birth to a Motherfucking Bear-o-dactyl
Who just might tear you a new...
So beware, motherfuckers, beeewwwaaaarrreeeee!

Jeremy Tucker : These two men really look ready tonight! I expect big things from them.

He is the Motherfucking Pterodactyl
He is the Motherfucking Pterodactyl
Remember him
Remember his song
Remember his tire iron and
His enccccchhhhanting thong

Both men move toward their corners and, after briefly conferring, Jack moves to the outside.

He is the Motherfucking Pterodactyl!

Just before the bell sounds, Hehe and Haha rush across the ring in tandem, Hehe with slightly move speed clashes with Dinosaurio, driving him into the corner just as Haha slams into the back of Hehe, doubling the impact.

[Ding, Ding!

Jeremy Tucker : Hehe and Haha not waiting for the bell to get this match underway!

Andrew Fulton : You cant blame them just because the ref was slow calling a start to the match!

[Haha backs out of the corner as Hehe drags Dinosaurio out. Hehe drives an elbow into the Lucha's head, staggering the significantly lighter man. Haha steps forward and the twins tie Pequeño up before hitting a double suplex.]

Jeremy Tucker : Referee Vick Mackey's orders for one of the twins to leave the ring are falling on deaf ears! It's like they want to be disqualified!

[Hehe locks Pequeño in an armbar as Haha starts stomping on his midsection.]

Andrew Fulton : The double team continues!

[Jack leaps over the top rope and charges toward the clowns, he leaps across Dinosaurio hitting Haha with a savage spear.]

Andrew Fulton : Union Jack in and attempting to make the save... But the idiot failed to break the submission attempt!

Jeremy Tucker : That was less about breaking the submission and more getting in on the action!

[Jack has Haha pinned to the mat beneath him and is raining blows down on the clown.]

Jeremy Tucker : Ground and Pound from Union Jack!

[Hehe breaks the hold to deal with Jack, but has underestimated Dinosaurio's resilience. Hehe, hooks Jack's arm on the draw back and locks him in a Kata ha jime, but before he can bring Jack down to the mat Pequeño is to his feet and hits the clown with a dropkick, sending him rolling over Jack and landing hard on his twins face. Haha's legs flail moments before Hehe hops up holding his groin. Jack and Dinosaurio back off toward their corner to regroup.]

Andrew Fulton : OH MY GOD! That looked invasive!

[Hehe turns just in time to see both members of Bear-O-Dactyl rushing him, but it's too late to react. The Lucha's leap through the air hitting picture perfect dual dropkicks knocking Hehe back to the mat. Jack is back to his feet as Haha uses the ropes to right himself. The Brit goes off the ropes opposite, charges across the ring and clotheslines Haha to the outside.]

Andrew Fulton : Union Jack taking Haha to the outside!

Jeremy Tucker : Maybe now Vick Mackey can get some control in this match!

[Dinosaurio grabs Hehe's arm, pulling the heavier wrestler to his feet. The lucha twists his opponents wrist and drags him toward the corner. Dinosaurio leaps to the top, bounces up off the top rope and comes down in a seated position. The momentum propels him backward and he hits a springboard armdrag, tossing the clown across the ring.]

Jeremy Tucker : Hehe tossed like a ragdoll!

Andrew Fulton : But he's back to his feet!

Jeremy Tucker : Too little, too late!

[Dinosaurio rushes toward the clown, performs a sudden handspring, flips spectacularly and hits an incredible diving clothesline!]

Jeremy Tucker : Pequeño Dinosaurio nearly taking Hehe's head off!

Dinosaurio hooks the leg..

…1

…2

…Haha kicks Dinosaurio in the back of the head, breaking the pin.

Jeremy Tucker : Dinosaurio's incredible speed almost ending the night early!

Andrew Fulton : That's what she said!

[Haha drags Dinosaurio to his feet and performs a Russian Leg Sweep. Hehe and Haha each grab one of Dinosaurio's feet and lift his legs, Haha sticks a finger up at Jack on the outside before the twin's double stomp Pequeño's groin.]

Jeremy Tucker : OH!

[Jack clambers through the ropes and runs at Haha. Hehe hits Jack with a stiff clothesline before the Brit reaches his brother. Haha begins stomping the downed Union Jack while Hehe grabs Dinosaurio's leg and hooks in an ankle lock.]

Jeremy Tucker : Hehe preventing the save from Union Jack!

[Vick Mackey forces himself between Haha and Jack, demanding the clown leaves the ring.]

Andrew Fulton : Dinosaurio may be in trouble here!

[Hehe pulls Dinosaurio to his feet and pushes him back into the corner. Hehe tags Haha, bringing his brother back into the ring. The twins send Dinosaurio across the ring with a stiff Irish Whip. Dinosaurio leaps through the air, wrapping an arm around Hehe's neck, locks his legs around Haha's head, flips and drives both clowns to the mat.]

Jeremy Tucker : And just like that Dinosaurio is back in this thing with an impressive display of athleticism!

[Dinosaurio clambers back to his feet and leaps to the top rope, perching on the turnbuckle. As Haha regains his feet Dinosaurio leaps through the air, landing on Haha's chest and spiking him into the mat with a shuddering double foot stomp. Dinosaurio rolls through over to his own corner and tags Union Jack.]

Jeremy Tucker : Dinosaurio makes the tag officially bringing Union Jack into the match for the first time!

[Jack rushes across the ring as Haha is slowly pulling himself to his feet. Union Jack hits Haha with a shining wizard before he can finish regain his feet.]

Andrew Fulton : That was like he wanted to put his knee through Haha's head!

[Jack lines himself up and drops, driving his elbow into Haha's throat.]

Jeremy Tucker : Vick Mackey admonishing Union Jack!

[Jack grabs Haha's arm, presses a boot into his arm pit and another into the side of his head. Jack pulled unforgivingly on Haha's arm in a modified Wrenching Arm Bar. Haha wraps an arm around the bottom rope and Vick Mackey begins to count.]

Jeremy Tucker : Jack refusing to break the hold!

…1 …2 …3 …4 Jack reluctantly breaks the hold.

Andrew Fulton : Union Jack tags out to Pequeño Dinosaurio!

[Dinosaurio bounds over the top rope, runs across the ring and performs a baseball slide under the ropes to take Hehe off of the apron and prevent Haha getting the tag.]

Jeremy Tucker : Dinosaurio isolating Haha!

[Dinosaurio hops onto the apron, drives a shoulder through the ropes into Haha's gut, staggering the clown. He leaps up, onto the ropes and springs through the air, catching Haha in an Hurricanrana. Haha slams into his own corner and slumps to the floor. Dinosaurio charges across the ring and hits Haha with a huge seated dropkick.]

Andrew Fulton : Huge dropkick!

Jeremy Tucker : Dinosaurio's awe inspiring speed is the real takeaway from this match!

[Dinosaurio leaps up to the top rope as Haha rolls conveniently toward the middle of the ring. He poses to the crowd receiving a huge reaction, before leaping through the air and hitting a 5 Star Pterodactyl Splash on the prone clown.]

Jeremy Tucker : 5 Star Pterodactyl Splash!

[Union Jack is excitedly calling for the tag from the outside. Confused, Dinosaurio hesitates before reluctantly heading to his partner and making the tag.]

Andrew Fulton : Union Jack get's the tag!

Jeremy Tucker : Why?! Dinosaurio had the match won!

[Jack crosses the ring toward his downed opponent, a huge smile on his face. Jack stands over Haha who is starting to regain consciousness. Jack stares down at him, holds out his hand and raises a middle finger at the clown before grabbing his shorts, pulling one leg aside to expose his right testicle and drops to his knees over Haha's face. Panicking, Haha kicks and squirms. Shocked, Mackey has no idea what to do.]

Jeremy Tucker : What the hell?!

[Hehe urgently climbs into the ring...]

Andrew Fulton : Here comes Hehe!

...And Dinosaurio hits a stiff crossbody taking Hehe and himself to the outside.

Jeremy Tucker : Unfortunately for us all, Dinosaurio prevents the save!

[Laughing as he rubs his nut around Haha's mouth, Jack yells something at Mackey who, reluctantly, drops to the mat and starts a count.]

Andrew Fulton : What?!

…1

Andrew Fulton : NO!!!

…2

Andrew Fulton : It cant be legal...

[…Suddenly Haha clamps down on Jack's testicle, biting hard. The Luchador screams and falls forward, breaking the pin.]

Jeremy Tucker : OH MY GOD!

[Irate, Haha clambers to his feet and drives a stiff boot into the back of Jack's head, spilling him to the mat.]

Andrew Fulton : Haha looks like he's about to lose his mind!

[Haha stands over the fallen Brit, grabs a handful of his mask and pulls his upper body off of the mat. Haha swings his meaty arm around Jacks head, slamming his forearm into the Brit's head. Haha slams his arm again and again into Jack's skull, screaming in anger.]

Jeremy Tucker : Haha looks as though he's trying to tear Jack's head off of his shoulders!

Andrew Fulton : Can you blame him?!

[Haha grabs Jack around the waist, hoists him up and immediately throws him overhead, executing a brutal release German Suplex. Jack's body bounces harshly over the canvas and he lands in a heap near one of the unmanned corners of the ring.]

Jeremy Tucker : Jack thrown around the ring like he is nothing!

Andrew Fulton : He has cost his team their chance at winning this match!

[Jack grabs the ropes in an attempt to pull himself to safety, but Haha hits the corner with a turnbuckle splash, driving the air out of his opponent’s body.]

Jeremy Tucker : Jarring impact!

[Haha drags Jack to his feet and toward the corner where he tags out to Hehe. The twins lead Jack to the center of the ring and Irish Whip him into a vacant corner. Hehe grabs his brother and Irish Whip's him into Jack. Haha hits hard, rebounds from the corner and moves just in time for Hehe to hit Jack with another turnbuckle splash.]

Jeremy Tucker : Jack must be regretting his actions right about now!

[Hehe Whips Jack across the ring and into the opposite corner, following Jack in, he hits another turnbuckle splash, this time with Haha hot on his heels. Haha slams into his brother's body, doubling the impact on poor Jack.]

Andrew Fulton : Union Jack's ribcage may have been reduced to dust after that impact!

[Jack stumbles from the corner and as he falls is spiked into the mat by a double Impact DDT from the Twin Clown's.]

Andrew Fulton : Spike DDT!

Hehe hooks Jacks leg…1

Jeremy Tucker : Union Jack will be seeing stars for a week after that!

…2

Andrew Fulton : Here comes Pequeño!

[…Dinosaurio crosses the ring with unbelievable speed. As Haha tries to block the Lucha's progress, Dinosaurio leaps into the air and sails over the 5ft clown, slamming down onto Hehe with a diving elbow to break the pin.]

Jeremy Tucker : Dinosaurio's lightning fast reactions saving his partner!

Andrew Fulton : But is it too little, too late?!

[Haha grabs Dinosaurio from behind and pulls him to his feet. He brings a series of clubbing blows down on the neck and upper back of the Lucha, spins him around, grabbing him in a headlock. Haha wrenches on the lighter mans neck before twisting and hitting an unforgiving neckbreaker.]

Jeremy Tucker : Now it's Dinosaurio paying the price for Jack's mistake as Haha's rage takes over this match!

[Hehe climbs to his feet and Jack rolls against the bottom turnbuckle, clearly in trouble. Hehe grabs the top rope and uses it for leverage as he wedges his boot under Jack's jaw.]

Andrew Fulton : Hehe is just picking Jack's bones at this point, the damage has been done!

[Haha rolls under the bottom rope, aggressively pulls Pequeño to the outside and drives him spine first into the ring apron. As Dinosaurio staggers, Haha grabs his head, hops over the barrier into the crowd and drives his head into the railing.]

Jeremy Tucker : Dinosaurio almost beheaded on that security railing!

[Hehe breaks the illegal choke at the last moment, yelling angrily at Mackey and backing him away from the ropes as he gets in the referee's face. Suddenly, Jack bolts and throws himself into the back of Hehe's legs, causing the Clown to fall back. Jack rolls him back in a Surprise Roll up and Mackey drops to the mat for the ...1]

Jeremy Tucker : Surprise roll up!

…2

Andrew Fulton : What?!

…3!!!!!

Andrew Fulton : How?!

Jeremy Tucker : It's over! Union Jack picks up the pinfall!!

Frank Salazar : The winners of this match, by pinfall... Bear-O-Dactyl!

Andrew Fulton : I don’t believe it!

Jeremy Tucker : Jack managed to secure the win, but very nearly cost his team the match!

Andrew Fulton : Haha and Hehe look enraged! Neither man can believe what just happened!

Jeremy Tucker : As if things weren't heated enough with the KGB, I think Union Jack just made them worse here tonight!

['The Motherfucking Pterodactyl' by Sarah Donner and The Oatmeal blasts over the PA and the crowd are going crazy as Pequeño Dinosaurio comes into the ring and hugs the dazed and confused Union Jack]

Andrew Fulton : I can’t believe what I just saw!!

Jeremy Tucker I can! Dino and Jack first to advance into the second round here in the Anzac Cup! Coming up next, The Champ Eddie and The Don Joanne against Lucky Linda and Blaze Freya!

[frostbite]

A hot and muggy day Down Under and for those you might be old enough to remember the group Men At Work no we are not talking about the cover name of the album back in the middle of late eighties, but enough of that though, the heat is so bad that you just may quite pass out in the streets or wherever you are. As we just say that there is a short gray haired elderly lady with a couple of paper bags in her hands as she is walking down the street as we get a closer look we see a box of frosted flakes sticking out from the top of the bag, sure kids are not the only ones you liked this stuff old people do as well. The elderly lady is wearing a white sweater which we can understand why she just might pass out because after all who would wear something like that as hot as it is outside. It is so hot that Hades might feel cooler, but you know how old people get they have thin blood. The elderly lady looks straight ahead as she spots a bus stop as she is walking toward to it, but that walk turns into a walk where it seems as though it is miles away when in fact it is only a few feet to make that trip. The sweat is pouring from her face as she begins to breathe heavy as she quickly drops her bags to the ground as we see her groceries go rolling everywhere. The elderly lady falls flat on her face as the heat becomes too much, and nobody appears to be in sight to help her, as she lays there I am sure she sees her life flashing in front of her eyes. But from out of nowhere at it must be some sign from above as a black limo turns the corner, as they appear to spot the elderly lady clutching onto whatever time she might have left on this earth. The limo pulls up right next to her as the driver jumps out, he walks over to the elderly lady as he picks her up like she was a feather and helps her to a nearby park bench. The short black haired gentleman takes off his black hat as he begins to fan the lady as her breathing starts to getting back to normal. The young man begins to unbutton his white dress shirt because he is probably getting hot himself. The young man has on black dress pants and black shoes. The young man continues to fan the elderly woman to see if she is doing okay trying his best to get her some cold air but in this heat good luck with that.

Voice.. Hey you dumb ass. We have somewhere to be.

The driver turns his head toward the limo as another young man steps out from the back of it. The limo driver shrugs his shoulders, as he is trying to explain something to the other gentleman. The limo driver as we zoom in, we see that it is Texas Pete.

Texas Pete.. I am trying to help this lovely lady. She was face down on the ground probably because of heat exhaustion.

Voice.. So this is why you stop then?

Texas Pete.. Yes it is, trying to do the right thing.

The young man comes from the back of the limo as he walks toward the elderly lady and Texas Pete. However this short blonde haired gentleman appears to have the right idea because he is wearing a blue tee shirt with blue jeans and blue and white shoes. He gets to the park bench where the two are at. He takes a look at the elderly lady as he looks right into her brown eyes and then looks back at Texas Pete.

Texas Pete.. We need to put her in the limo and take her to a nearby hospital and make sure she is doing okay.

The young man looks back at the limo and then at the two once again, as we zoom in we see that it is Frostbite. However he does not look to thrilled that Texas Pete stopped for this woman.

Frostbite.. You stopped for this?

Texas Pete.. Yes , I did.

As the intense look in Frostbite blue eyes are getting well more intense as he feels this is a waste of time, you can be assure of this.

Frostbite.. She looks fine to me.

Texas Pete.. She is not, I promise you this.

Frostbite with rage building up grabs Texas Pete by the back of his neck as he tosses him in front of the limo.

Frostbite.. We do not have all day. We have things to do. i do not have time for you to be someone guardian angel. You know my love is in the back of the limo, she has somewhere she has to be just like I do as well.

Frostbite walks back over to the elderly lady.

Frostbite.. Their is nothing wrong with you grandma. You want the world to feel sorry for you, because you are well old. I guess you think the world owes you something when in fact it does not owe you a damn thing. However this world owes me a whole lot. This damn world will not allow for true love to be together nope it decides to toy with my emotions and my love emotions as well. But you sit there on that bench and you want to world to feel sorry for you. i know your social security paid for those groceries that has been thrown all over the streets. You look fine to me. I bet you probably tripped on a crack in the sidewalk and just happen to fall flat on your face. I get it, you are clumsy, I guess that happens to you once you get old.

The elderly woman has had enough of Frostbite's crap she gets up from the bench as she reaches up with every ounce of her strength in her weaken state body as she tries to slap Frostbite but he blocks her hand, as he looks at her with an intense look in his blue eyes.

Frostbite.. You really believe, I was going to allow you to slap me. What in the hell is wrong with the people in this worthless ass country. Quite frankly you smell bad. I forget you old people have that horrible smell.

He turns his nose up.

Frostbite.. You smell like Kangaroo shit. We need to hurry up and get out of this country. I know the boss is from here and maybe that is why i just might give this country a slight pass, but your old ass, I do not. I bet hard working people such as Paul, have to use their tax dollars to carry you freeloaders, not saying back in the states we do not have to the same thing, but looking at you.

He shakes his head.

Frostbite.. This is unreal.

Frostbite turns around as he stops the local bus coming around the corner.

Frostbite.. Well, I guess it must be your lucky day, because here comes your ride.

He looks at Texas Pete face first on the hood of the limo, and then back the woman.

Frostbite.. You really believe I was going to give your stinky ass a ride. I would not do such a thing. My true love can not have her ride smelling like. what did I say earlier. Ah, like Kangaroo shit.

The bus stops right in front of them.

Frostbite.. I hope are old ass as money, but if I know you old people, probably cry about such and the bus driver will feel sorry for you and allowed you to ride for free. You damn old people really believe you run the world.

The bus comes to a stop as the door swings open as the elderly lady slowly gets on the bus looking back at Frostbite with disgust as she turns her attention to the driver, as she is saying something to him.

Frostbite shakes his head.

Frostbite.. She is whining like a little bitch and telling the poor bus driver what had just happen.

The door shuts as the bus rides away. Texas Pete pulls himself off the hood of the car, Frostbite looks over at him.

Frostbite.. Get your ass back in that limo. We are behind schedule, you know my love and I have places to go and people to see.

Texas Pete gets back in the limo as Frostbite heads to the back of it. He hops back in as he shuts the door behind him. He looks over and sitting right across from him, if you want to say it that way his cellphone with the picture of the SWAT World title on it. Frostbite looks around as he sees the bar not too far from him. He reaches over as he grabs a glass and a bottle of whiskey, as he pours it, he places it right next to his phone. He puts the whiskey bottle back behind the bar.

Frostbite.. I am so sorry my love for the delay. Your homeboy, was trying to be mister nice guy and help out some old hag, who claims that she passed out because of this heat. I thought you could use the drink to calm down your nerves. I know we are in a hurry. i know you want to check out some place near the beach here. I got to ask where did you see this place.

Frostbite leans over as if it really talking to him as he listening.

Frostbite.. You do not say? Paul's pilot knows a local realtor that can get you a good deal here. I guess that does not surprise me after all Paul is from here and knows people who knows people. You say there is a place on the beach with a great view of the ocean that you really like.

Frostbite leans in once again.

Frostbite.. My love nothing is to good for you. I told you, that whatever you want, it is yours. But why here? I know people back in the states that can get you, a place on the beach maybe in Florida.

Frostbite leans back as he really believes he is listening to his phone as if they are having some type of conversation.

Frostbite.. If that is your wish, just hope your boy up front can find it, because if you can not then i will beat his ass, and forget about the deal we made to help him and his family out. Another freeloader maybe that is why he felt sorry for that old lady, because they are one in the same. Did you give him directions?

Frostbite pushes a button as he window between him and the driver rolls down.

Frostbite.. Hey, let's get going. My woman must not be kept waiting. Put your foot on the gas, and after that I have a meeting to get between myself and Armand, we have a cup to win this evening, so i do not have all day.

He pushes the window to go back up as Texas Pete pulls off, as Frostbite looks at his watch. He shakes his head as he runs his fingers through his short blonde hair. He looks over at his phone as if it is saying something to him.

Frostbite.. I am okay my love thank you for your concern, you know my love I guess you can say doing some heavy thinking. These last two years in this Anzac Cup tournament I have very close to winning this. I worked with someone that I could not stand, we hated each other with a passion and hell we almost one the damn thing. I hate to say this, but I really believe if we could have worked together somehow, i believe we would have won it. I missed Tarrasque. Last year, the Don and I almost pulled it off. But we could not do it. But this year things are so different my love. I have a partner who is as ruthless as I am. We are even the tag team champions. For years, I have never been much on tag team wrestling but this year things are going to be so different I promise. We aee going to win the cup this year. If I have to burn every damn team in this tournament to do so, I will do so. It is time that I take my legacy to another level. Armand and I, are going to win this thing. After all my love, you could use the company. My woman and the cup, sounds like a winner to me.

He looks over at the glass and the whiskey is gone and we do not know how either.

Frostbite.. But we have things we still need to talk about. I know that you are in another arms. I know that Eddie D has you know. I am sure he will do his very best to keep you safe that I know. But I feel bad because it is not me the one that is holding you in my arms. I know it is in the family, but i still feel my love, you should be mine and nobody else. I am torn with so much conflict inside. All, I ever wanted is you and nobody else but you. You are everything to me, but you are in Eddie's arms and I have to live with that.

Frostbite drops his head, but he quickly picks it back up as if his phone is once again saying something to him.

Frostbite.. I promise you that, we will be together someday and I am a man of my word. If i get you this beach house, then once and for all it should show you that I truly and deeply in love with you. But tonight, we must focus on getting rid of Project X are first round opponents. I will burn them for you my love and every single team along the way to show that I love you.

He reaches over as he picks up the phone and kisses it.

Frostbite.. Project X, I promise you, well X will mark the spot and you will bounce out of here. Because this will be the damn year that my partner and I will win the cup.

He look over to his phone.

Frostbite.. Right my love?

He nods his head.

Frostbite.. Well, Project X..

A wicked grin comes across his lips.

Frostbite.. BURN, BABY BURN!!!!!!!

Suddenly, Frostbite feels the limo has come to a stop. The door opens as Texas Pete holds the door open for Frostbite as he grabs his phone, as they get out the limo as they look around..

To be continue....

[Deleted]

Backstage at the Rod Laver Arena, a backdrop for the Twenty Twenty-one Anzac Cup pops the background with red, a traditional colour representing the blood of the soldiers. This tournament was one of the highlights of the SWAT calendar, an event everyone was looking to win.

In fact, it attracted such attention that teams from outside SWAT often competed, including his Call to Arms opponent, Bloodied Fox. A win here or even a good showing would go a long way toward gaining a SWAT Tagteam Championship match, something the young Bear-o-dactyl team was keenly aware of.

Warren W. Webber is camera center flanked by SWAT prospects Pequeno Dinosaurio and Union Jack, Warren is smiling as he begins, “Triple W, Warren W. Webber here backstage at SWAT’s annual Anzac Cup with the first team to advance to round two! Bear-o-dactyl! Now, even with that win, people still have you as something of a dark horse in this tournament, what do you have to say to that?”

Motioning with his hand Pequeno Dinosaurio is the first to step up to the microphone, “Look, we get it Warren, we do. Soutter and the KGB have rigged this tournament against us. We had the clowns in round one and could face their reigning Tagteam champions if we pass through our side of the bracket, and we’re aware of what happened last time amigos.” Alluding to the shenanigans that saw the young Bear-o-dactyl team suffer their first loss alongside Lucky Linda this past Battleground.

Directing the microphone to the ever unpredictable Lucha bear, Jack snatched the nervous Warren by the forearm dragging the microphone close enough to catch the Brit’s breathing. “ Armand Von Krout, you’re a cunt!” Immediately turning to his British friend and partner in Bear-o-dactyl, stopping him cold.

Immediately wide eyed, the straight laced Pequeno Dinosaurio is heard perfectly without the benefit of a microphone, “Jack! You can’t say that!” He exclaims, but it’s too late, the train had left the station.

“Oy, right…I’ll just spell it out for our mate Wyatt here, it’ll be fine. ‘C’ is for ‘Cunt’…” Tugging Warren’s arm towards him, Dinosaurio tries to slow the derailment.

“Jack! Ok amigo very funny…” Completely ignoring Dinosaurio, Jack simply tugs Warren back toward him, and continues his spelling bee assignment.

“U is for ‘“u” “r” a cunt’…” The young dinosaur is trying his best not to laugh while simultaneously attempting to guide this interview back onto the rails.

Dinosaurio is practically pleading with Jack now, “Jack come on! This is serious amigo! We have everything you need to win this whole thing! Speed, technical ability, teamwork, we’re a complete package!” His smile is as big as the young former Television Champion’s heart, he knew this was his friend’s way of coping with the burden they shared, the family expectations of young stars raised in ‘the business’, but this was a time to take things seriously. They had a legitimate chance at winning if they just could pull it together.

Warren nods, conceding his points but equally powerless without control of his microphone to stop the mouth of the Brit, “N is for ‘not sure if you know this Armand, but you’re a cunt’…”

Giving up upon realizing it would take more energy now to stop him than let him finish, Dinosaurio crossed his arms, shaking his head as Union Jack proudly proclaimed. “And finally T is for ‘turn around and fuck off mate, ‘cause you’re a cunt’!” Turning to his friend triumphantly, he finishes, “See?! Subtle!”

Trying to salvage this interview before heading off to prepare for round two, Pequeno Dinosaurio directs the trembling hand of Warren back in his direction, “Don’t let the masks and games fool you, when that bell rings we’re as serious as it gets!”

That was true for at least one of them, which prompts Warren to address the ‘incident’ from the match.

”Well, we get that you were busy, your partner certainly gave us a moment to remember as he, what the fans have deemed, ”Mcnut rubbed” himself on one of the clowns, granted he paid for it but how can you say this team is serious after something like that?!”

Dinosaurio manages a look of complete confusion despite the mask. In fact, such is his confusion that he snaps back into Spanish, ”Que?” Shaking his head, he catches himself. ”He did what?”

Off camera a monitor plays back action from minutes ago of the British bear rubbing his testicle around the mouth of Hehehe only to be bitten for the effort. Dinosaurio’s jaw drops, he can’t believe what he’s just seen.

”I, I mean I had no idea…” Sensing the confusion of his partner, Jack jumps back in.

”None of that is important, what’s important is we won and we move on to the next round and we’re ready! We’re sick of these KGB cunts getting in our business, especially Dino’s so we’re going all the way in this thing, then they’ll have no choice but to give us that tag team championship match we deserve!” Fired up, the Brit marches off camera prompting Dinosaurio to end things.
.
”Thanks Warren, we’ll see you later tonight! Round two and onto the next!” Stepping past Warren and out of the shot, the veteran SWAT interviewer is left alone to send it back to ringside.

”That was Bear-o-dactyl, the first team to advance to round two in the twenty twenty one Anzac Cup, now back to ringside and Andrew Fulton and Jeremy Tucker!”

[Ruin]

[We see a shot in the front row of a large man that looks out of place with the rest of the crowd. He winks to the camera.]

Jeremy Tucker : Take a look at that guy Fulton. He is put together.

Andrew Fulton : Put together?  He is a hoss Jerry.  He could be in this Anzac cup as a ONE man team.

[edwarddubin0604]

(Phantam Fairtex is watching the action on the monitor while having a light snack and enjoying the action as Katie Moss approaches. he turns and looks at her smiling since it's her and not Warren W. Webber.)

Phantam Fairtex: "Katie what can I do for you while I'm here watching the action."

Katie Moss: "What do you have against Warren W. Webber."

Phantam Fairtex: "He's a bad omen. You see every time that guy interviews us we lose a match. He's a bad omen. He's like a ladder you don't want to walk under. He's like a warlock that curses someone because he didn't get what he was promised in turn for a hit job he did on some rival. You know what Psychotic Goth would do if The KGB crosses his path again which he would probably be hoping for."

Katie Moss: "Team Fairtex drew The Hell Hounds in the first round."

Phantam Fairtex: "Yeah we got a couple of literal stinkers. Now don't get us wrong Katie Team Fairtex knows they are a veteran tag team and we know that they are tough. Yet they aren't Team Fairtex. They aren't a real well oiled tag team machine that isn't afraid of any team or any combination like those losers Rally Jackson and his bodyguard...Oh sorry Rally El Combatealorean. In fact allow me to entertain you on our views of our opponents The Hell Hounds."

Katie Moss: "You're not going to....."

(Phantam mockingly looks shocked as he puts his hands to his heart.)

Phantam Fairtex: "Please. I'm not that jackass piece of trash Osland Oxford."

(He picks up a big boom box and turns it on rap music blares loudly from the speakers.)

Phantam Fairtex: "My name is Phantam and I have to say The Hell Hounds are a tough opponent. No way. Yes Way. Oh yeah they are good that I can see. Yet they need to change their litter because they really smell like old pee."

(The music booms briefly.)

Phantam Fairtex: "You got Cerberus, who's not in any relation to the dog star or constellation. If he was it would be a shame since he's really lame."

(The music once again booms.)

Phantam Fairtex: "then there's Psycho and he's really crazy. crazy. Don't even think that Team Fairtex will be lazy. We plan on showing a real mean side. They won't know where we're going to hide. We'll strike hard and strike fast and The Hell Hounds won't be able to last."

(The music once again booms.)

Phantam Fairtex: "Then there's Reverend Cornelius Marsh a man who claims to be a man of god. He hosts a dumb religious broadcast that is a real dog. He was a god awful wrestler in SWAT and Hardkore World he was even beaten by a woman named Vampira. So he decided to leave the wrestling to real men so he can find his zen."

(The music booms louder.)

Phantam Fairtex: "So he got an epiphany and god allegedly told him. There's gold in that their managing. So he followed His command and found two stinking dogs. He molded them and trained them to follow his orders. Then he unleashed them and won plenty of gold. The problem is now The Hell Hounds and clueless Cornelius are just too old."

(The music booms even louder as Katie Moss attempts to point to something.)

Phantam Fairtex: "So they should have just freed their spot for someone more qualified because Team Fairtex is going to put them out of their misery. After the first round they are going to be history."

Katie Moss: "Phantam.......!"

Phantam Fairtex: "What I'm on a roll."

(The music goes off suddenly and Phantam looks to see The Hired Killers.)

Phantam Fairtex: "What's wrong."

Kim: "You're supposed to meet your brother for your match with The Hell Hounds."

Phantam Fairtex: "I was just entertaining and trash talking The Hell Hounds at the same time which is more than I can say for Osland Oxford."

Kim: "Don't forget the deal you made with us after we bailed you out in Canada."

Phantam Fairtex: "I remember and that was for the XHF Trios Championship."

Kim: "The deal also includes The Anzac Cup so no added pressure."

Phantam Fairtex: "Yeah no added pressure."

Kim: "Don't forget win in the first round."

Phantam Fairtex: "Team Fairtex is going to win in the first round."

Kim: "Good. Your brother is waiting for you."

(Phantam throws his arms up and sighs before leaving.)

Katie Moss: "Well things are certainly getting interesting. Back to you guys."

(The scene slowly fades to black.)

[sc4r]

| OVERNIGHT SENSATION |

## No one knows quite how this thing goes
There's no right way to chase it
After all the booze and tears and patience
I'm an overnight sensation ##

Dark. Dank. Musty. Sunlight barely breaks thru the small windows atop the high brick walls of this building. Dust particles float through as the sound of smacking leather fills the area. A training ring set up in one corner, weights opposite it. A set of mats cover the floor in another with some heavy bags hanging down from the ceiling near them. One of them moves back and forth with the sound of the smacks. As it does, we see Devon peppering a bag with heavy kicks. He stops, just letting the bag swing as he bends over to catch his breath. His hands on his knees, he reaches down and grabs a towel and begins to wipe the sweat away. As he walks over towards the ring, he tosses the towel into the ropes and begins unwrapping his hands. "Is this.. like a running joke to some of y'all?" He tosses the wraps into the bag as he hops up on the apron. Grabbing a bottle of water from the bag, he takes a big swig. He reaches into the bag and pulls out the SWAT US Championship Belt and sets it next to him. "You think this is the first belt of my career, Williams? First one in a while, I'll grant you that, but no. See, if it wasn't for my break, this would've been my 20th year in the business. Instead, I'm coming up on 15 in August. And it's just over 14 since my very first title win."

Laying the belt in his lap, he runs his fingers over it fondly, evoking the memories of that night. "Still remember it like it was yesterday. Some shitty nightclub in New England. Rhode Island, I think. I won, what they called, The Americana Championship. It was their version of a US or TV title, but back then everyone and everything needed a catchy name and gimmick." Folding the straps inward, he puts the belt back onto the apron next to him before reaching back into the bag to pull out his face. After a large hit, he blows the vapor out, down towards the title. Surrounded by the makeshift cloud, it seems to hold a bit of mystery all of a sudden. "Let's see from there I spent the next decade between Japan and Mexico where I picked up another handful of titles, trophies and plaques. Mexico likes their random tournament plaques after someone of some significance passes on."

"Couple of tag leagues in Japan, six man's in Mexico. If you can think of a title, I've probably won a version of it somewhere. After that I came back to the states as a favor to a friend and ended up back here in Chicago at Colosseum. A grand slam and 4 years later I walked away when the doors closed. Injuries and bullshit, I was tired of it. It was all falling apart for everyone, so I quietly made my exit. Opened this place and, until SWAT had come calling, didn't look back."

Another hit of the vape, another cloud of smoke fills the air. "The point of this little story is at no, Keith, the burden is not heavy. It ain't my first god dman rodeo, ain't gonna be my last either, which, while I'm thinking of it." He stops and begins to clap his hands together in applause. "Congrats are in order for our new World Champion. I know some of you were thinking I was fixated on beating Goth for the world title at some point but, that was never the case. It doesn't matter who holds it, Goth was just two birds with one stone, the title is end game. It always has been. Don't get me wrong." He reaches over and holds up the US title once more. "This is a great start, but that's all it is. A START. Give me the TV title, give me the ANZAC Cup, I'll take it all. I'll start walking around like Ultimo, needing a separate seat for just the belts!" He puts the title back down next to him. "There was a point in time where I collected titles like people collect pokemon cards and I'll fucking do it again!"

Another hit. Another cloud.

"It's so very nice to hear from you, Kaupena. I'm glad to hear you're going to turn up the heat for this one. I've watched a couple of your matches and you remind me of a couple of kids I knew back in the day. Dare I say was a nice feeling to see someone actually putting work in and not treating this like a part time gig. I like tournaments like this. Single night's. I've done tour tourneys and league. They're fun and all but there's nothing like one night shows, anything can happen. Don't worry about me. Trust me, I turn up. I'm not as hot-headed as I used to be, but just because I'm a bit more reserved than I was in my youth, doesn't make me any less dangerous. Ask Keith. Ask Goth." He smiles and lets out a small chuckle. "Ask... Donzig."

"You're doing it again, by the way. Looking past your opponent. Remember what happened last time? I think I've thanked you enough, by the way, what more do you want? A title shot? Get in line for all I care. For the record, I think I'm better than you because I've already beat you, but I digress. Actually.."

He takes a hit of the vape, his fingers tapping against his chin before exhaling another cloud. "I probably shouldn't because there's a chance we'll see each other in the second round if you get by Bloody Zen and we get by Stevens and Anderson. Basically, we'll be seeing each other in the second round, no offence to you two but, realistically, Kaupena feels like a whole new man and I'm just on a fucking roll lately, so yea.. no hard feelings, it just what it is.."

"Even better" a female voice breaks thru the darkness, startling Devon slightly. Willa's face breaks thru the shadows as she leans over the top rope of the ring, looking down at him. "Don't fucking do that."

"Do what?" She asks quizzically. "Sneak in here like a god damned ninja. Bout gave me a fucking heart attack." She just giggles. "Jesus fuck. What's even better?"

"That if you make it to the final four, you might face Williams and Osland." Devon's eyes light up. "I was only half joking earlier when I said I'd take his TV title too but, fuck it, I just might! Someone get Onoo on the phone."

"Yoko?" She asks.

"No, the other one." He says back.

"There's another one?" She replies, confused.

"Boy that side's just a greatest hits of my time here so far. Is there even anyone on the other side of the bracket?" He questions.

"Both half of the KGB, who could face each other in the semi's. Fairtex, Hellhounds, Linda and Freya. Usual suspects more or less. So, why Kaupena?"

"Mostly cause it was a chance to piss Donzig off, but also seemed a good match out of anyone that didn't have a partner already. I don't mind random tag match up's. Remember when Colo had a Lethal Lottery tourney? Paired me with Vola after I had just beat her for the TV title."

"Yea, I remember. You ran that tournament, beat Liz and Quake in the finals and held the titles for damn near a year, wasn't it?"

He nods as he exhales another cloud into the air. "Uh huh and because it wasn't the most well known place at the time or something, nobody knows or remembers and it doesn't matter or some shit."

"They do know Google is free, right?"

"Probably not. They'd rather sit in their own little world with their own rules that they get to set and play by and honestly, it's what I hate the most these days. No one pays attention anymore. Half these morons probably couldn't tell you whose in the other side of the bracket, even after looking at it or remember if they work here. I hate to sound like the old man that yelled the cloud but Jesus Christ, that's what this is. We used to study this sport and the people in it because, at that time, anyone could jump anywhere and there's a decent chance you didn't know who you were going to face one week to the next, so you did your best to mitigate the circumstances and try to always be prepared. But now.. now if it's not on your personal, narrow radar it's niche and new, even if it's been around forever. If it's outside your periphery, it doesn't fucking exist and when someone who fills that category comes in and takes the world champion to their FUCKING LIMIT and then walks out with a US title not a month later, they act like they're an overnight sensation."

He scoffs. "Yea. Right. That's me.. an overnight sensation... 15 years in the fucking making."

| FIN |

[SWAT Team]

The house lights go down, as a spotlight goes over the crowd. As the spotlight comes to a stop at the back of the entrance way, as "Courtesy Call" by Thousand Foot Krutch begins to play. A picture of the Italian Flag appears on the screen with the letters F.B.I over the flag, with the words "FULL BLOODED ITALIAN" written underneath.

Frank Salazar: The following is a tag-team contest scheduled for one fall and is a first round match in the SWAT 2021 Anzac Cup! Introducing first...

It soon changes to scenes of mob hits, newspaper clippings from just recent to the late 1900's, but soon changes once again, to shots of the Mafioso, sitting in a large office, and in limos, and in arena's from times since past. The spotlight focuses on four figures figures standing at the start of the ramp. This is Joanne and her bodyguards.

Frank Salazar: Residing at The Jersey Shore, New Jersey... Standing in at 5'11" and weighing 135 pounds... THE JERSEY DEVIL DIVA... JOOOOOOOOOOO-AAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEEE CCCCCCCCCAAAAAAAAAAAAA-NNNNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLIIIIIIIII!!!

"Cave" by Muse blares and Eddie D walks out with a black and white montage video playing on the screens of him weight training and hitting his favorite moves on people, flashing up in negative to the beat of the music.  

The Big Deal regularly threatens rude fans, tears up opponents' fan posters on his way to the ring and has a vicious one liner for an "ugly" fan. As he walks confidently and slowly to the ring, Eddie D raises his hands to accept the praise he feels he is due, but the crowd erupt in a chorus of boos and jeers.

Frank Salazar: Hailing from Vernon, California... A height of 6' and 303 pounds... THE BIG DEAL... EDD-IIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD!!! THEY ARE... THE K-G-B!!!

They make their way down the ramp, Eddie D at the rear of the group, Joanne in the middle with Reno and Rude on either side, and Scarpaci following behind. Talking amongst themselves, The KGB ignore the crowd around them. When they reach the ring, Reno holds open the ropes for Canelli as she slips inside. Following after, the group enter and surround her as she stands in the middle of the ring. She removes her jacket and hands it to one of the guys before they head out of the ring. In their corner, Eddie D and Joanne Canelli wait for the arrival of Linda and Blaze.

"Linger" by The Cranberries hits and Lucky Linda makes her way down the ramp way, high fiving the fans.

Frank Salazar: Their opponents, hailing from Dublin, Ireland... Coming in at 5'5" and weighing 130 pounds... LLLLLLLLLLUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKYYYYYYYYYY LLLLLLLLLLIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNDDDDDDDDAAAAAAAA LLLLLLAAAAAAAAA FFFFFFEEEEEEYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!

Stopping at ringside, La Fey turns to look as Freya makes her entrance and is introduced.

The arena darkens and fans erupt into loud cheers as "Collapsing" by Demon Hunter blasts through the speakers. Red, pink and purple lights flicker on and off in rapid succession creating a beautiful strobe effect over the stage as none other than the Blackpool Bombshell herself, Blaze Freya comes out from behind the curtain, walking backwards onto the stage with a charismatic strut. Her black hood covers her lowered head until she spins around triggering the lights to brighten to reveal her gorgeous face as she removes the hood, headbanging with the fans a bit.

Frank Salazar: And her tag-team partner, from Blackpool, England... 5'6" and weighing 125 pounds... THE BLACKPOOL BOMBSHELL... BBBBBBLLLLLLLAAAAAAAZZZZZZZZZEEEEEEEEEEEE FFFFFFFRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEE-YYYYYYYYYYAAAAAAAAAAA!!!

She nods in approval hearing the roar of the crowd, feeding off of their excitement then rolls her shoulders a few times, sprinting down the ramp. As Blaze nears Linda, her partner is already primed and matches the running speed, both women sliding into the ring together. Instantly deciding the pace of the match, Eddie and Joanne swarm their opponents, laying in stiff stomps and punches! Getting back up only results in more offense that leaves Linda and Blaze on their stomachs.

Jeremy Tucker: This is starting off hot and heavy! Have they even rung the bell?

Andrew Fulton: I don't think so! The KGB aren't going to let these two get an inch on them!

Jeremy Tucker: Freya's tossed to the outside and Linda is completely vulnerable! Like sharks, Eddie D and Joanne Canelli are circling their prey!

Andrew Fulton: There's blood in the water; they can smell it! Or is it that time of the month for Blaze?

Jeremy Tucker: You're disgusting, Fulton! Phil Weston is doing his best to get The KGB separated from La Fey, but he's only able to usher Canelli back to their corner as Eddie D isn't so easily pushed around. The SWAT World Heavyweight Champion is savagely beating Linda!

Andrew Fulton: What did you expect, Jerry? We saw a preview of this and it wasn't pretty. I'm surprised the Blackpool Bombshell is so eager to run head first into the Big Deal after what happened!

Jeremy Tucker: I'm not! The KGB wanted her as an ally and made Blaze an enemy. They've made her list and she's scratching names off!

Andrew Fulton: Attempting to help her partner, Freya climbs through the ropes and dashes at Eddie D! Slamming into the Big Deal as hard as she can, Blaze produces minimal impact. The rhinoceros of The KGB pauses his attack on Linda, shifting his giant body until he's able to examine what hit him. Laughing, Eddie dares Blaze to try something else.

Jeremy Tucker: Flipping him a middle finger, Freya pulls down her tights to expose her ass and runs into the ropes! Charging at Eddie full blast, Blaze jumps and bounces off of the Big Deal's face, planting her cheeks against it!

Andrew Fulton: That's not what a lady does! Unmoved, Eddie wipes the disease off his face and motions for her to take another crack at him.

Jeremy Tucker: Pulling her tights up, Blaze hits the ropes and... SHOULDER BLOCK BY EDDIE D!!!

Andrew Fulton: That's my boy! He flattened her, Jerry!

Jeremy Tucker: She barely turned around only for the Big Deal to hurdle his body at her and send the former SWAT Amazons Champion tumbling to the outside!

Andrew Fulton: Imagine a bowling ball getting thrown at a child and that's about the same result! Hahaha!

Jeremy Tucker: What is wrong with you?!

Andrew Fulton: Nothing, Jerry! What's wrong with you?!

Jeremy Tucker: Having somewhat recovered, Linda is back on her feet and Eddie doesn't know it! SPINNING ROUNDHOUSE KICK! LA FEY'S FOOT CONNECTS WITH THE SPINE OF EDDIE D!!!

Andrew Fulton: Slightly wincing, the SWAT World Heavyweight Champion spins to meet the person that just kicked him, receiving another Spinning Roundhouse Kick!

Jeremy Tucker: Right to the gut!

Andrew Fulton: Slightly bent over, Eddie D is prone long enough for Lucky Linda to leap out of the nearby corner and pull the Big Deal into... THE IRISH DESTROYER!!!

Jeremy Tucker: THE IRISH DESTROYER!!!

Andrew Fulton: Not expecting to pin Eddie, La Fey loads up a superkick and unloads it on Eddie as he quickly gets back to his feet! Agitated, the kick to the face isn't helpful in changing the demeanor of The KGB muscle.

Jeremy Tucker: Going for broke, Linda superkicks the jaw of the Big Deal a second time and it has about as much effect as the first. Cranking his neck to the side, then back in place, Eddie steps forward and grabs La Fey. Roughly scooping her up, D doesn't delay the body slam as he tries to whip her through the mat.

Andrew Fulton: Jerry, you know what?

Jeremy Tucker: What, Fulton?

Andrew Fulton: I haven't heard a bell.

Jeremy Tucker: I'm not sure if we've officially started yet. The referee has been fighting to maintain control.

Andrew Fulton: Where's Blaze? Oh, there she is! She's crawled up on the apron in her team's corner!

Jeremy Tucker: Phil Weston seems to have this on track now, he signals to the timekeeper.

Andrew Fulton: There's the bell!

Jeremy Tucker: Tagging out, Eddie D takes his place on the ring apron as Joanne Canelli enters and immediately rolls Linda over, positioning her left foot on the leg of La Fey as the Jersey Devil Diva applies a half surfboard!

Andrew Fulton: She's got the wrists held, Canelli puts her right foot on the back of Linda's head...

Jeremy Tucker: BITE THE CURB!!!

Andrew Fulton: Soutter get your checkbook, Linda's gonna need some serious reconstructive surgery!

Jeremy Tucker: Keeping her foot pressed into Linda's skull, Joanne grinds her heel and causes further damage as La Fey's face is forced into the mat!

Andrew Fulton: Clapping, cheering, Blaze's moral support isn't doing anything to stop the onslaught. Mocking the competition, Canelli seizes the arm of Linda and reaches out with it like she's trying to get the hot tag to Freya.

Not liking this one bit, the fans vocalize their displeasure by booing and jeering Joanne.

Jeremy Tucker: The KGB are despicable, deplorable people. I can't believe what we're seeing.

Andrew Fulton: I can! This is what they're good at, this is what wins them matches.

Jeremy Tucker: And what exactly is that?

Andrew Fulton: Degrading their opponents.

Jeremy Tucker: I fail to understand how that's a worthwhile winning tactic.

Andrew Fulton: Hard to defend yourself when your pride is torn to shreds.

Jeremy Tucker: Manipulating the fingers of La Fey, Joanne one by one cracks them in front of the desperate Blaze Freya.

Andrew Fulton: She wants that tag, Jerry! She needs that tag! The KGB won't let her get it!

Jeremy Tucker: Pushing Linda's hand into the mat, angling the arm, and forcing her elbow skyward, Canelli stomps down on the point of the elbow, leaving Lucky Linda a screaming, fractured mess.

Andrew Fulton: Holding her hurt arm as it hangs limply from her side, fingers twisted and broken, La Fey is defenseless as slaps rain down on her from the Jersey Devil Diva!

Jeremy Tucker: Battered repeatedly, Linda slumps over before she's dragged to her feet and tossed over the shoulders of Canelli.

Andrew Fulton: She's going for the Bullseye! If she hits this, The KGB are moving forward in the Anzac Cup!

Jeremy Tucker: Precariously squirming atop Joanne, Linda manages to free herself from her predicament! Dropkick! IRA Kick! SUPERKICK!!!

Andrew Fulton: No! Noo!! Nooo!!! Noooo!!!!

Jeremy Tucker: La Fey needs to make the tag! However, Joanne is only dazed, not immobile!

Andrew Fulton: If Eddie D gets in there it's not going to matter! He's hungry for destruction!

Jeremy Tucker: So far this has been about only one thing. The KGB inflicting pain. Neither Joanne nor Eddie have gone for a pin. You have to wonder what's more important to them.

Andrew Fulton: Winning is always important! Shut up, Jerry!

Jeremy Tucker: Canelli moves in the direction of Linda... SPINNING ROUNDHOUSE KICK!!!

Andrew Fulton: Joanne stumbles into a neutral corner, La Fey makes the tag to Blaze Freya! Eddie, cut her off, don't let that skank touch the Godfather!

The fans can't control themselves as they explode with excitement, cheering the name of Blaze Freya as she finally gets the tag she's wanted.

Jeremy Tucker: Too late! Like a house on fire, the Blackpool Bombshell erupts out of her team's corner and somersaults into the ring! She's rolling, she's rolling, she's rolling, DOUBLE-KNEE FACEBREAKER IN THE CORNER ON JOANNE CANELLI!!!

Andrew Fulton: She's not done! That psycho's going to hurt Joanne!

Jeremy Tucker: Good, she deserves it after what she did to Linda!

Andrew Fulton: Don't leave the corner, Canelli, she's coming!

Jeremy Tucker: TORN! TORN! TORN! TORN! TORN!

Andrew Fulton: Why'd you repeat it? She didn't hit the move five times!

Jeremy Tucker: Blaze covers Joanne and Phil Weston is right there to count the pin!

ONE!!!


TWO!!!


KICKOUT!!!

Andrew Fulton: Thank God!

Filing out from the curtain, Bruno, Armand Von Krauss, and Frostbite walk to the beginning of the rampway.

Jeremy Tucker: What's going on? Why have Bruno, Armand, and Frostbite appeared? They have no business being out here!

Andrew Fulton: Of course they do! This is a match with KGB members, stupid!

Jeremy Tucker: The distraction is enough to let Freya take her eyes off Canelli, who crawls to The KGB side of the ring and tags in a fired up Eddie D.

Joined by Jonnie Valentine who slowly saunters out, the rest of The KGB members don't notice this until he taps them all on the shoulders and waves.

Andrew Fulton: What?! What?! What?! Jonnie Valentine has no business being out here!

Jeremy Tucker: Where have I heard that before?

Andrew Fulton: Instead of blindsiding Freya, Eddie D diverts his attention to the former SWAT commissioner.

Jeremy Tucker: Yelling, pointing, poking out his chest, the Big Deal isn't happy that Mr. Hilarity interfered!

Andrew Fulton: You're not paying attention, Big Deal!

Jonnie Valentine indicates there's something behind Eddie he should look into, but the SWAT World Heavyweight Champion is too mad to care.

Jeremy Tucker: Having removed her shoes and socks, Blaze Freya discharges a bicycle kick to the lower back of Eddie D!

Andrew Fulton: Too slow to respond, Eddie takes a bicycle kick to the chest! Hold on, is that a tattoo on her foot?!

Jeremy Tucker: Yes it is, Fulton! It's spelled E A T D E F E A T!

Andrew Fulton: Gross! She's big booted her foot into the mouth of Eddie D, he's gagging!

Jeremy Tucker: Blaze snatches the wrist of Eddie and falls backward, foot still in the Big Deal's mouth, EAT DEFEAT!!!

Andrew Fulton: What is Linda doing? No!!!

Jeremy Tucker: LUCKY DIP! LUCKY DIP! LUCKY DIP!

Andrew Fulton: This isn't legal!

Jeremy Tucker: Jonnie, Bruno, Armand, and Frostbite watch as La Fey steams across the ring, FLYING KNEE TO THE FACE OF THE JERSEY DEVIL DIVA KNOCKING HER OFF THE APRON!!!

Andrew Fulton: Blaze is on the top rope? Big Deal, get out of there!

Jeremy Tucker: NO SHOES? NO SOCKS? NO PROBLEM! DOUBLE STOMP TO THE FACE OF EDDIE D!!!

Andrew Fulton: Right into the pin, Weston don't count for her!

ONE!!!


TWO!!!


THREE!!!

Frank Salazar: Ladies and gentlemen, the winners of this contest... LUCKY LINDA LA FEY AND THE BLACKPOOL BOMBSHELL BLAZE FREYA!!!

Jeremy Tucker: They've done it! Linda and Blaze have made it to the next round!

Andrew Fulton: This can't be real. Am I dreaming?

Jeremy Tucker: You aren't, Fulton! This win is going to have huge ramifications on the future of SWAT! You'd have to believe Freya has just secured herself a shot at the SWAT World Heavyweight Championship!

Andrew Fulton: I don't believe that! Not at all! It was a fluke!

[SWAT Team]

[”Circus Apocalypse” by Vermillion Lies begins playing as Armand von Krauss walks out from the back. He looks around at the crowd with an arrogant smirk before lighting up an Egyptian cigarette. He walks down to the ring while smoking his cigarette, soaking in the boos from the crowd. Once he gets down to the ring he steps through the ropes and leans in his corner. We see lotus flying on the Titan tron for a few seconds as more and more join in, until day turns to night as the image fades out, and the next image you see is tanks firing in the air, and right after that image we see soliders walking in unison and that image fades out and another of a huge nuclear explosion as you see nothing but ashes and dust of a city. The lights in the arena go completely dark for a few seconds as it comes back up a blue light is seen up the show of the steps as someone is standing up there wearing a gray hoodie with their head down. As they slowly pick up their head, we can see an intense look in their blue eyes, we see that it is Frostbite. He takes a walk down the steps as fans reached out to touch his hands or his broad shoulders. As he stops midway looking into the crowd as he nods his head as the crowd chants his name. He gets to the bottom of the step, he climbs over the barricade. He quickly takes off his hoodie and hands it over to some fan at ringside. He turns his attention to the ring. He begins to climb the steps and jumps over the top ropes. The lights turns back to normal and his music fades as he is ready for a war.]

Frank Salazar: The following match is a first round match in the ANZAC CUP and is scheduled for one fall. Entering the ring first, representing the KGB, the team of Frostbite and Armand von Krauss!

Andrew Fulton: Jeremy I am excited for this. This is gonna be a clinic. The SWAT Tag Team Champions are going all the way to the top this year.

Jeremy Tucker: They certainly have the recent success to say they can. Their opponents are an unknown quantity though.

Frank Salazar: And their opponents, representing J-ROK. They are Kai Imai and Midas Hartwell, PROJECT X!

[“Ni**as In Paris” by Jay-Z (feat Kanye West) begins to play on the SWAT Speakers as the team from Japan makes their entrance into the Anzac Cup. The crowd from down under shows them some love as they make their way to the ring. They slide under the bottom rope and turn to face the crowd]

Jeremy Tucker: These two gentlemen are strikers of the highest caliber and OH MY!

[Before the bell, the KGB charge and attack the men from behind. Clubbing forearms from both KGB agents has Project X on the back foot. Armand clotheslines Kai out of the ring as Frostbite sends Hartwell careening into the neutral corner and barrels in with a clothesline before whipping him at Armand who hits a savage headbutt on the moving target. Frosty steps to the apron and Armand commands the ref to ring the bell before putting his cigarette out on the face of Midas Hartwell.]

DING DING DING

Jeremy Tucker: Well that was very unsportsmanlike.

Andrew Fulton: It’s about the victories Tucker. These two guys are from a fed that celebrates death matches, they should have seen this coming. The KGB can’t be held responsible for their stupidity.

Jeremy Tucker: Well the Aussie half of this team based out of Japan is not getting a very warm welcome home from the KGB. Armand pulls Hartwell to his feet and holds him by the throat.

Andrew Fulton: He’s just giving him some neighborly advice on how not to suck.

Jeremy Tucker: He hits a pair of knee lifts to the gut. Midas swings to try and hit him back but Armand is too fast and avoids it punching him in the throat.

Andrew Fulton: Look at him struggle! Midas taking a flurry of punches to the face from the KGB commander. Armand is putting on a clinic with his measured strikes.

Jeremy Tucker: Midas somehow manages to get his hands up and block the attack before hitting a kick. DDT from Midas! Oh my Armand gets spiked to the mat.

Andrew Fulton: Hartwell turns to tag but Armand hooks the leg in a knee bar! What a smart move by the brilliant tactician. You need to show them some more respect Jeremy.

Jeremy Tucker: When they show it to me and the SWAT locker room.

Andrew Fulton: That’s not funny.

Jeremy Tucker: Midas manages to get to the ropes. Both men back to their feet. They circle. Midas moves to tag his partner but Armand cuts him off and hooks him for a suplex. Rolling through!

Andrew Fulton: A second suplex! And now a third!

Jeremy Tucker: No! Hartwell blocks it and sends a flurry of strikes to the ribs of Armand before grabbing him by the hair and slamming him to the mat.

Andrew Fulton: Armand furious with this, kips up! What a trooper! He whips Midas to prevent the tag. And now Frostbite is in the ring from a tag! The KGB showing that vaunted teamwork as they use the entire five count to beat the snot out of this upstart.

Jeremy Tucker: It’s clear there’s no homeland advantage here. Frostbite with a few knee strikes to the ribs and thighs has Hartwell crumpled to the mat. Russian Leg sweep from the cold hearted bastard.

Andrew Fulton: As Hartwell crawls away, Frosty with the kick to the back of the head. He pulls the loser up to his feet and with authority he puts him BACK on the mat with a spinebuster!

ONE!
Kickout from Midas.

[Frostbite laughs as he pulls out a lighter. He shows it to Midas and taunts him. But Midas catches him with a huge headbutt. One pele kick later and both men are down.]

Andrew Fulton: OH no Frostbite’s lighter has gone into the crowd! Kira Izumi will need to reimburse SWAT for this!

Jeremy Tucker: It’s a zippo Andrew …

Andrew Fulton: So?

Jeremy Tucker: Hartwell with a dropkick to the chest of Frostbite as they stand. He slowly crawls to his corner and makes a tag. Frostbite follows suit.

Andrew Fulton: Armand barrels into the ring but Kai springboards off the ropes and hits a big dropkick! Armand come on!

Jeremy Tucker: Von Krauss rolls to his feet and gets an arm drag for his trouble. And then another one. Finally a big hip toss. Kai wastes no movement as he springs to the middle rope and flies off with a backflip stomp to the gut. Jackknife pin!

ONE!
Armand powers out.

Jeremy Tucker: Too early here, but the young Brit is showing some fire. He springs off the ropes and catches a standing Armand with a meteora!

Andrew Fulton: He’s dipping into the well too often I think. YUP! Another springboard meteora is caught by Armand with a snake eyes into the friendly corner. And now Armand is lecturing the ref on proper technique!

Jeremy Tucker: No he was distracting the ref so Frostbite could slug Kai Imai in the face with a hard right hand. Kai spirals out of the corner and Armand drags him into a crossface. It is in tight. Kai kicks at the ropes but his feet are just out of reach. Oh and Hartwell comes in and breaks it up with a punt to the gut of Armand.

Andrew Fulton: And now the idiot ref is stopping Frostbite from coming into the ring as Hartwell retreats. What a schmuck.

Jeremy Tucker: New lease on life here for Kai Imai as he pulls Armand up and hits a German suplex. He holds the waistlock and hauls von Krauss to his feet. Back suplex! He floats over for the cover. But Frostbite kicks through the ropes and breaks it up. Too close to the enemy corner there for Project X.

Andrew Fulton: Now Imai again pulls Armand to his feet and hits a belly to belly. He sprints to his corner and leaps to the top rope. As Armand stands up, springboard reverse rana! Armand get up!

ONE!
TWO!
Armand kicks out holding the back of his head.

Jeremy Tucker: Kai wasting no time climbing on top and raining forearms down. Frostbite begins to move into the ring and Midas Hartwell now charges into the ring. Oh but the ref stops Midas as Frostbite waits on the apron laughing.

[As soon as the ref pushes Midas back to his corner, Frostbite enters and grabs Kai by his hair and hauls him to his feet. Full nelson slam from the cold-hearted one.]

Jeremy Tucker: Now with the damage done Frostbite back to the apron. Both legal men are down.

Andrew Fulton: Armand quickly crawls to Frostbite and tags him in. Frostbite with the springboard leg drop and pin!

One!
Kickout by Kai Imai.

Jeremy Tucker: And no go as Imai gets the shoulder up quickly. Frostbite smirks and palms his face! Oh the disrespect. He pulls Kai up and slams him with the iron claw slam. He mouths off to the crowd now.

Andrew Fulton: He’s soaking in the adoration of the SWAT faithful Tucker. And now Frostbite raining punches down on the inept flyer!

Jeremy Tucker: Frostbite is certainly bringing it tonight. He hits the fall away slam and then dusts off his hands. Imai crawls to the ropes and underneath. Frostbite now taunts Hartwell on the apron and the ref has to go wrangle him back into the corner again.

Andrew Fulton: And IT’S GOOD! GOAL! A clean kick to the nose of Imai from Armand on the apron and the bastard is bloodied up good!

Jeremy Tucker: Armand retreats to the corner and pleads innocent when the ref comes over.

Andrew Fulton: Frosty now grabs the poor fool and ragdolls him into the center of the ring with a cobra clutch slam. Look at him crawl to his partner. But Frosty with a boot to the back as he stands on top of the fool taunting his partner.

Jeremy Tucker: Kai uses this time to roll over underneath he distracted Frostbite. He rolls him up!

One!
Kickout.

Andrew Fulton: And that was unwise. Frostbite now rolls to his feet and clobbers Kai with a spinning clothesline as he stands. Frostbite ignoring the pin to inflict more pain. Elbows for days! More blood spilled from the face of Kai! Love it!

Jeremy Tucker: Frostbite is in rare form here as he bludgeons the poor flyer. Frostbite deadlifts him and slams him down with a gutwrench suplex. And a pin.

ONE!
TWO!
Broken up by Midas!

[Frostbite takes a swing at Midas but misses. He mouths off and goes back to Kai who pokes him in the eye.]

Andrew Fulton: WHAT A DISPICABLE CHEAT! Disqualify them ref!

Jeremy Tucker: Would you stop it? Kai hooks him for a suplex but Frostbite blocks it and hits a DDT to the tired striker. Frostbite stands up and angrily wipes at his eyes. He tags in Armand.

Andrew Fulton: And von Krauss wastes no time coming in and clamping on the Brain Crush! Look at his legs kick in agony Jeremy.

Jeremy Tucker: Armand is ruthless. He smashes the face of the helpless Kai into his knees. He then rolls him up.

ONE!
TWO!
Kickout by Kai.

Andrew Fulton: Armand is not worried here. He picks Kai up and shoves him off the ropes. SUPERMAN HEART PUNCH! And now again locking in the knee bar to destroy the flying capabilities.

Jeremy Tucker: But Imai manages to roll forward and send Armand stumbling towards Midas. Armand swings but Midas dodges. Kai barrels in with a shotgun dropkick! He then leaps up with a corner splash and tags in Midas!

Andrew Fulton: Hartwell barrels into the ring and clears Frostbite off the apron with a shoulder barge. Coming back towards us and he runs a train over Armand as well! On the rebound he hits the spear on Armand! Frostbite onto the apron and Hartwell charges him and knocks him down again!

Jeremy Tucker: As Armand stands he goes for the Time Splitter! But Armand dodges it. But on the rebound Midas cleans him out with the bicycle pump kick!

ONE!
TWO!
Kickout with authority

Jeremy Tucker: Armand favors his ribs after that kick but gets to his feet. He throws a punch! Returned by Midas! Armand! Midas! Armand! Midas! Midas dodges under one and hits a huge saito suplex. Armand is slow to his feet. Clothesline!

Andrew Fulton: This is terrible! Midas is on fire right now!

Jeremy Tucker: Midas sure enough pulls Armand to his feet and whips him into his own corner. Charging clothesline and tag!

Andrew Fulton: Imai leaps into the ring and hits a flurry of kicks while Midas holds Armand in place with his shoulder buried in Armand’s gut!

Jeremy Tucker: Imai waits as Midas goes outside an then tags him back in. They pull Armand from the corner. Kai leaps up top as Armand is pulled into the powerbomb. Disrupted Territory! Kai’s knees clobber Armand into the powerbomb.

Andrew Fulton: Kai however has his momentum carry him right into Frostbite in the ring. What a massive spear.

ONE!
TWO!
Frostbite breaks it up.

Jeremy Tucker: Midas rolls out of the pin and crushes Frostbite with a spinning forearm smash. Frostbite stumbles back and the ref guides him to his corner. Midas turns and begins laying into the now sitting Armand with a heavy set of fists.

Andrew Fulton: The ref is still focused on Frostbite. OH MY! YES! Armand with the uppercut to the jewels of Midas! Both men down now. Armand rolls towards Frostbite. He tags him in!

Jeremy Tucker: Frostbite charges in and grabs Kai Imai from the mat. He pulls him to the ropes and launches him to the outside where he rolls into the barricade with a massive belly to belly overhead suplex.

Andrew Fulton: Midas catches him with a headbutt to the gut. But Frostbite with the double axe handle. He hooks the head of the still grimacing Midas Hartwell. Here it comes! SNOWSTORM!

Jeremy Tucker: The big front brainbuster! And the pin. It’s academic.

ONE!
TWO!
THREE!

Frank Salazar: Here are your winners, the SWAT Tag Team Champions, the KGB, FROSTBITE AND ARMAND VON KRAUSS!

Andrew Fulton: I knew they would win the whole time! All the way Jeremy! All the way!

[h2f]

Mistress Discipline and Chaos walk down the street holding a box of cupcakes each.

“I realize that he is my one true tag team partner but this tournament comes on the heels of the previous tournament which directly followed another tournament. Perhaps hold off on more scheduling for at least a week.”

Chaos rolled her eyes. “With this much sugar in your system, there is no way you are tiring out that fast. This is for Death Trap. AND getting enough points to win that tag team belt. Or have you forgotten your plans for the celebration of your tag team union. Because I’ve already bought one of those French maid costumes.”

Mistress Discipline looks over sharply. “French maid costumes? Oh, because you will be my maid of honor. I mean you will be helping out with ensuring the union celebration ceremony goes well but I will not expect you to dress as a maid. I would actually prefer if you dressed in more formal attire and not something you found in the back of Not Erotic Wrestling Stories.”

Chaos snorts. “NEWS has some good quality merchandise and I didn’t buy it just for you.”

“Not touching that. Moving on, Death Trap seemed pretty somber on the phone. I hope these cupcakes can cheer him up. Obviously we are a better team than the Assassins; I could barely find any information on them.”

The two turn towards the doors to the building lobby.

Chaos shrugs. “They must not be very good if we can’t find more information. I don’t want you to lose sight of our goal though. The Assassins are just step one of several before we can pick out the throwing axes.”

The two walk into the elevator and Mistress presses a numbered button with her elbow before turning to Chaos.

“Throwing axes?”

Chaos taps her foot. “Your bridesmaid gift. Personalized throwing axes. I showed you the Etsy page the other day.”

The two wait for the doors to open before continuing down the hall and checking the numbers. They flank a door and knock.

“Of course, right. Honestly, we should wait on ordering anything. Or it will lead to more questions.”

[bloodiedfox]

We cut to a backstage interview area, where...

Hello, I'm Warren W. Webber and I'm here with Bloody Zen Romance. Fox, Mr Harding, do you have a response to the recent comments by your first round opponents Donzig and Lady Sinclair Godfrey?

Bloodied Fox goes to speak, but an irate looking Brendan Harding slips around him to get to the mic first.

You're damn right I do, Triple W! Donzy, Lady Penelope, you want to run your mouths speaking bullshit? You're about to find out that you will not be able to cash the cheques you're writing, regardless of how much money her ladyship's ancestors made owning slaves or shitting on the Irish or shipping Donzy's ancestors here! You think you can insult me and not have it blow up in your faces? Nobody, and I mean nobody, is calling me Falco Lombardi and getting away with it!

Fox facepalms, as Warren looks confused.

You're upset because they referred to you as a character from Star Fox?

I'm upset they referred to me as that particular character from Star Fox! Falco is an obnoxious prick who is practically the avatar of small dick energy! Slippy and Peppy are both way cooler than him! Plus, I've already got this whole wolf motif going...

He waves his entrance mask.

...so not calling me Wolf O'Donnell proves they're idiots.

But Fox and Wolf are on opposing teams.

Yeah, but there's all that rule 34 furry porn of them fucking...

Attempting to stop the promo derailing any further, Fox gently nudges Brendan away from the microphone and positions himself in front of it.

What I think my husband is trying to say is that neither Donzig nor Lady Godfrey seem to be taking us particularly seriously. I mean, Star Fox and The Fox and The Hound riffs? That'd be like me showing up here and just throwing in Crocodile Dundee and Downton Abbey gags. It's fucking lazy, and it betrays that you're so caught up in your own shit that you aren't giving us the focus you really should be. I get it, I do, because that's the exact same trap that I fell into last year. You remember what happened to us last year, Warren.

You lost in the first round.

Exactly! I was so laser focused on getting to Zoran and so sure of my superiority that I practically slit my own throat. Now a year down the line, you've got Donzig going on and on about Devon D'Andre, while Lady Godfrey pouts that her tag partner won't fuck her. Am I really supposed to believe they're taking us seriously when neither of them have us as number one on their to do list?

If only Donzy would put her ladyship on his to do list...

Fox groans at the pun, though Warren has to stifle a chuckle with a cough before his next query.

So you're not intimidated by Donzig's talk of the void and his status as the Herald of Oblivion.

No, I'm not. Donzig can rant and scream all he wants about how nothing comes after life; he's just a man, same as me. He no more knows what comes after this life than any of us, and even if he is right, what difference does it make? If all we have is the here and now, then the here and now is all that matters. So here and now, I'll walk down to that ring with the man I love, look Donzig straight in the eye, then kick him upside his bald head. He and Godfrey can bring all their little cultists, because fuck knows I've had enough experience beating up cultists from the war between Legion and LGBTKO, and we'll send them all running back to their boiler room. They want to say they're the coming darkness? That's fine, because we're gonna light a fucking flamethrower!

BURN. IT. DOWN!!!

Brendan does his best Seth Rollins laugh, which really sounds like more of a Skeletor, as we fade to black.

[Dave D-Flipz]

"I don’t know what you were expecting Paul. I really don’t. It all seemed so obvious. It all seemed so standard. The man with all the answers, the man with the plan, the men with the army behind them. And not one of you could figure it out."

*Death Trap steps in front of the camera. We are in a dark locker room. DT is in his wrestling gear already, sporting his hat, shades, hoodie, tights, and a scowl the size of the Space Needle*

Death Trap: "I don’t get you. I never will. Because I am not a man who thinks the way you do. I don’t define success by the failings of others, the sorrow of others, the hatred of others. I don’t see myself as some kind of martyr for the cause or some kind of mastermind like you do. I’m just a wrestler, man. I’m here to put butts in seats, put on a show, and make money for whoever is footing the bill for the arena that day."

*He sits back on a bench with his arms folded over his chest. He looks to the side avoiding direct eye contact with the camera.*

Death Trap: "I’ve never been a guy who plans complex plans. I’m a simple guy. I go out there, I do what I do best, and I walk out when it’s over. The fans erupt in cheers. My name gets chanted. You make money. It’s not hard. It’s not a difficult thing to comprehend. So tell me where you all got it so wrong. At what point did ‘The Main Attraction’ become an enigma to you all? At what point did you get your heads so far up your ass you couldn’t even check your sources?"

*DT looks down to the ground letting his hoodie obscure his face, only the brim of his bowler hat visible under the fabric.*

Death Trap: "Let me spell things out for you real quick Armand and Paul. Let me make very clear where I stand in all of this. I came here to make you money. I came here as a guest attraction to boost your ratings. I came here to be an ambassador from the old XHF and from MCCW. I was a champion stepping foot in your house to help your business and one of your top stars. I was here … to wrestle. And somewhere in all the wrestling some complicated business plot took hold. Armand is here kidnapping, murdering, bribing, and blackmailing his way to control of the company. Armand is here having an army of men ruin the very show to make you money, for vainglorious personal reasons. And he’s driven away or injured all of your top stars. All the guys the fans PAY TO SEE. At what point did it become smart business to have nobody credible to challenge your top stars? Where in the lineup of business moves do we find purging the company of any reason to have a company? I don’t … get it. And I don’t claim to be a business mind. But it seems like a poor strategy. If only we had a way to know what would happen … OH FUCKING WAIT."

*DT lifts his head and pulls his hood down and his glasses off and stares a hole into the camera lens.*

Death Trap: "It’s called Riot Star Wrestling. It’s called Armand spending time in jail DESPITE all his money, business connections, blackmail, armies, etc. At what point do you screw up SO BAD that the Republican Party can look at you for inspiration on how to do corruption the best way possible, and you STILL CAN’T get away from the shit you pulled? It’s frankly awe-inspiring how pathetic Armand and his dealings are. Illegal! Illogical! And yet you decide … ‘yeah let’s hitch our wagon to this guy.’ You decide to fucking push the caravan off the cliff, while riding IN it, and wonder where you went wrong."

*DT throws his hat to the ground and stands up. He begins to pace with an antsy energy. We haven’t seen DT this deadly serious or angry in a very long time. The fire that drove him to the X*Crown after 16 years is back in droves. His eyes are glowing with intensity and annoyance at his lot in the fed. He fidgets as he talks, unable to contain the raw emotion*

Death Trap: "But let’s step beyond the long term and focus on me. After all I’m just a narcissist right? Self-serving. Let’s talk about how you paid to keep me around. You fell over yourself to keep me booked. You kept asking for more. And when MCCW vanished on me in the interim, it seemed like a good idea. Yeah I bought the shit. And now I feel burned. I feel like I can’t trust my own self to make decisions for my career. Discipline had you pegged from the outset. She warned me. But it was just a few dates. Just for the fans. I love wrestling to my very core. It’s what makes me whole, it’s what drives me. Hearing the fans, feeling the rush of the bright lights. Seeing my name in the marquee and holding those titles knowing I represent a company. It makes me belong."

*He sighs and sits back down, head in his hands*

Death Trap: "I don’t expect you to understand. It’s all business to you anyhow. Getting in the ring is a last resort to get what you want or have some fun. But this is what I am, who I am, all I know. I live for this shit. I fought for so long to get my mind back, to reclaim it from what this business did to it. And I threw myself right back into it the moment I could. I never intended to come back full time, it just happened. It was supposed to be one last match once I could think straight. End of Days legends celebration. But I couldn’t let it go. I had my life back. I had to live it. I could train a new generation and finally do things I’d never done before. I could bleed for this business again. I could get the fans on their feet again. And for the first time in my career, my peers respected me. It wasn’t all bile and hatred spewed at me, telling me I wasn’t worthy. I didn’t deserve it. No it was people predicting me to win the big matches. People actually cheering my wins. People standing behind me and congratulating me. I had … what I wanted … what the original XHF could never give me. I felt fulfilled. And you… tried … to take it from me … for literally no reason. I can’t express in words what kind of literal human shit I think you are Armand. And Paul is only marginally better. Maybe."

*He looks into the camera again and gets very intense*

Death Trap: "Look at what happens everywhere Armand goes. Wherever his reach touches. People get hurt. FOR SPORT! THIS IS A SPORT! IT’S ENTERTAINMENT! And he’s out there KILLING people, torturing people, kidnapping loved ones. He’s a fucking legit international criminal. Like FBI Most Wanted. And you hooked your horse to that. What a shit owner and pathetic excuse for a man you must be Suit. And the board lets you run this place … what a travesty. What a tragedy in our time. The sport may never recover from the reputation Armand von Krauss is giving us. And SWAT looks the worst for it. You have me and Linda and some luchadors. And then a bunch of lowlifes and scum. And you have a history of authority figures that includes Armand, Soutter, and Zoran GODDAMN FUCKING SAINOVIC! Talk about setting the bar low. The only reason Mongo keeps you around is so he looks like a fucking saint in comparison. The fat ass goes from evil corporate bigwig to ‘LOL that fat guy who loses to goats and got kicked in the dick a bunch!’"

*DT stands up again and looks around his locker room.*

Death Trap: "And so here I sit. A man against the world. Odds very poor I walk out of here ALIVE nevermind the winner. But let me tell you exactly how this is gonna go down Suit. First, I’m going to meet up with my tag team partner. Second, she and I are going to march to the ring and pick apart your job squad that is set in front of us. And let’s be real you are feeding them to the wolves. They are going to drive out in their stereotype laden taxi, get a pop from the crowd, set relations between the US, Australia and India back forty years, and then they are both going to tap out. No, we won’t injure your roster, that would be stupid. But we will make them cry for their mommies. And we will advance with little resistance. It’s kind of what we do. It took Radu Matei and the most motivated Anthony Caffrey to barely eke out a win against Top of the Class. The Indian Assassins are not going to be an imposition."

*DT looks at his phone to see the brackets. He smirks. He looks back into the camera.*

Death Trap: "And then we are going to get a chance to really sink our teeth into this roster. Because either we get a man who tried to end my career, and Radu’s, and his knock off of a true champion. Good to see him coming back and out of your grip. Or we get the king of sleaze and the master of tease. And I gotta say, it’s a real tough choice for me. Cuz part of me really wants to stuff one of my old socks down Rally Jackson’s throat. After all what’s a tag tourney without a good rib right Rally? And then I can shut his fat ass down and make him watch as his minion loses him his chance at returning to glory as I hold him down while Mistress Discipline torques his neck out of place and he throws in the towel. Hard to find good help when you are such a shitty human Rally. Ironic, the Golden God turns out to be a false idol. The golden bull falling to the wayside to the better option."

*DT sits down with a laugh*

Death Trap: "But then on the other hand, I’d love to get a chance to have a real wrestling match with the pie guys. After all, all they can talk about is how we shouldn’t have won because the match sucked. Well I’’m not best pleased either. But we drew what we drew. And you weren’t better than us. Swapping NJC for Ox isn’t going to change much. Here’s the deal Keith. You are clearly the better wrestlers than Rally. And honeslty part of me wants that challenge and to prove you wrong. But you are just so goddamn repellant. You and Ox could be superstars but you disgust everyone. It’s a shame to see wasted talent. But I’ll tell you what. If you can get past Rally and his costume party pal, Mistress and I promise to give you the match you so desire. And then you can KNOW for sure we are the better wrestlers. And the sad part is you MIGHT have had a chance. You could have put on a great match and had it be one of those, ‘on any given day either team could win!’ moments. But I have a mission. And I will not rest until I stand in the ring, Mistress by my side, across from Armand and Frostbite. And nothing is going to get in my way. Not a golden god. Not a king of sleaze. Not some luchadors, some Canadians, some loving couple, or an insane man and his insane girl."

*DT hears a knock at his door. He softens his tone and lowers his volume to finish up*

Death Trap: "And not … me. I will not stand in my own way. This ANZAC cup is not about putting on a show. It’s not about playing to the fans. It’s about giving them … AND ME … what we need. What has to happen. And nothing … and no one … and no sense of morality or conscience … will keep me from ruining the KGB’s day. I will … have my moment, if I have to claw it from the battered bodies of four clowns, from the crushed spirits of six top tier competitors. I will show Armand why you do NOT make things personal with me. After all, I’m the Main Attraction, the submission master, the unbreakable will. Or more simply? I’m … the best damn technical wrestler … in the goddamned world. And none of you will forget it."

*DT goes to open his locker room door to his partner.*

[Lucky Linda]

”One down. Three to go.” Says Lucky Linda sitting in her dressing room, an ice pack on a shoulder, Katie Moss seated beside her holding the microphone.

“That was a huge first round victory against the KGB and the new World Champion Eddie D” states Katie. “Who would have thought that?” she asks.

“I will tell you who” replies Linda. “Little ole Me! Lady Luck herself. Lucky Linda La Fey.” Linda smiles proudly. “That’s who. Sure Eddie is a big tough beast of a man. Sure he is also a smelly stinky Bandit.” Linda holds her nose with her finger and thumb. “Peeee You. Sure Joanne Canelli is a dangerous woman and as a Hall of Famer we all are well aware of her qualifications, but let me tell you one thing, The Blackpool Bombshell and Lucky Linda. We are pretty qualified as well. We are no doubt first ballot Hall of Famers also.”

“That is a fact” agrees Katie Moss enthusiastically.

“You know what else is a fact?” asks Linda. “That we are now in line for a shot at that shinny World Title belt that Eddie holds so proudly. But that is for another day. Today, right now, stands something in front of us just as important and prestigious. The Anzac Cup.”

“Last year you made the final as half of SWAT Classic with Radu, can you Blaze go one further?” asks Katie.

“I don’t see why not” Linda answers. “Who do we have next round? My tag team partners from ‘Off The Hook’ Pequeno and Jack?” Linda smiles again. “Two very different cats, aren’t they Katie?” asks Linda.

“That is one word for it.” Replies Katie.

“That’s what I like about them. They are different. We like different here at SWAT.” Linda grins. “They bring a lot to the plate. Plus, they hate the Bandits. To me, that makes them my friends. Sure Jack is a juvenile child, Dino not much better as all he does is chuckle along at Jack’s tom foolery. Come match time though, the time for laughing will be over, for them at least. They have to face the fury of the two most deadly women in the XHF!”

“Two most deadly?” asks Katie “What about your fellow team mates for Call To Arms, Isabel Rios, Mistress Discipline and Olympia?”

“I respect them all, as I do anyone who steps in the ring, but Call to Arms has been and gone and we gave it our best, they have my gratitude for joining our team, but I know full well we will all face again down the road. Rios is the flavour of the month. She has a certain charm to her, to be sure too be sure, but she is not the be all end all.”

“Do I detect a little jealousy there Linda?” asks Katie.

“I am not jealous of her Katie. No. Not one bit. I have done what she has done. I have been to the top of the mountain, I have held that Amazons belt, as has Blaze. I have won No Mans Land. She is having her issues her with Joanne at the moment, and defending the belt abroad in Canada also, I am watching that. Blaze is watching that. When that dust has settled, rest assured, we will be here doing what we do best.”

“And what is that, Linda?”

“That is giving our best and facing the best. Week in week out. Month in month out. I have been doing this for a long time now Katie. I know it’s a marathon, and I know it’s not every battle that counts but the war in the end. I defeated my old tag team partner Avery McCullen not because I was better than her for one night, but because I wanted it more and I took the bumps and the hits and I was resolute and the same with Zoran Sainovich. The darling of the XHF got ran out of town by yours truly. Why is that? Because I will not be defeated. Because it is not how hard you hit but how hard you can get hit and get back up again.”

“Those were the days” smiles Katie.

“They were indeed, fun times.” Linda ponders. “As are these. With new times come new challenges. New rivalries and new friendships. Rios I see being a big rival for as long as she wants to be. Bear-O-Dactyl have all the tools to go right to the top here at SWAT, only problem for them boys, they have ran into Blaze and myself and we don’t intend to lay down and give up, so if they want to get passed us, they are going to have to step up the game some and show us what they have.”

“Are you saying you think they will win?” asks Katie.

“Not on your life!” fires Linda. “We just beat Eddie D! THE Big Deal! Believe you me, no one saw that coming, but WE DID! Next stop, Dino and Jack. It sure doesn’t get easier, does it Katie?” asks Linda then answers her own question. “And we wouldn’t want it any other way! Let me ask you a question Bear-O-Dactyl … Do you feel lucky? Well, do ya? PUNKS?!”