Post by Steve Awesome on Aug 1, 2021 19:09:21 GMT -5
“And we’re back!”
We open in a local Detroit radio station studio. Steve had his wireless headset on and was on one side and the pretty midday host was on the other. Steve leaned back in his chair as the host brought her listeners up to speed.
“So I got with me, The Face of the Franchise, NPW’s own, and number one contender for the Openweight Championship, Steve Awesome. He takes on the champion D at August at the Atlantic on August fifth. Tickets are on sale but it's going fast folks! So tell us Steve, what do you think makes you a better champion then D?”
Steve glances over and gives her a flirty smile.
“Well all you gotta do is look at him and look at me and you can answer your own question, sweetheart.”
He gives the in-house camera recording this a handsome model pose. The host giggles.
“I mean with me, not only do you get the looks and the talent, but you get marketability too. I’m somebody a company can put on their posters and be proud of. I’m somebody that can come out to the promo spots and the public appearances and be entertaining. I’m not afraid of the spotlight. I thrive in it.”
He clears his throat.
“Do you really think any company really wants to put a painted up voodoo weirdo on their billboards? You got some innocent old lady driving down 96, and she looks up and see’s “D’s” giant face looking down at her.”
You can see him pantomime driving as an old women. Stereotypically knuckles tight and as close to the wheel as possible. He mocks a frail and shrill old voice as “she” sees the billboard.
“OH SWEET LORD IN HEAVEN!”
He clutched at his heart.
“THAT GUY LOOKS FUCKIN STUPID AS HELL!”
He gets serious again.
“The old lady has a heart attack and dies in the middle of traffic and causes a multiple car pile up. Is that what you want, host lady?”
She giggles and bats her eyes.
“Tee hee. No.”
“I know Gus Arnold sure as hell doesn’t need that on his conscience. I definitely don’t. If I’m Champ, no old ladies have to die. Plus, can you tell me what type of public interview D can really make? I mean, what? You have to go to a haunted church every time? Then when you finally get there it’s just gonna be him peering through the shadows. Like…”
He pulls his sunglasses off and rolls his eyes in the back of his head. He speaks in gravelly Gollum voice.
“....the darkness within me….”
He and the host laugh together and Steve just rolls his eyes.
“Come on, I’d be a way better champion by a long, long margin. So tell me sweet cheeks, between the colorful juggalo, D or the Face of the Franchise Steve Awesome? Who would you want on top?”
“Umm, who would I want on top?”
The lustful host kept it professional even though her answer was sitting in the room with her.
“Ahem. Erm, well you still need to win the belt from the champion at The Atlantic. What do you think are your chances against this crafty veteran?”
Steve rubbed his chin.
“I’m actually kind of worried to tell you the truth. I don’t know if you saw but in his last promo, he said he was really mad now. So naturally I’m questioning everything I’ve ever done in life up to this point.”
He laughs out loud.
“I’m just kidding. I’m not going to smear the guy and act like he can’t get it done in the ring. I can rip on him all day but he is a champion and remained a champion for a reason. I’d be an idiot to not believe that D could beat me. The dude has years of experience in the ring and you can’t teach that, but…”
A sly grin and a shrug from the contender.
“I’m what some would call….a confident man. And to tell you the truth. I believe that I’m going to walk out of The Atlantic as the new Openweight Champion. Because for as good as D is, I believe that I’m better. I believe that I want it more. I believe in the however the hell long D has been farting around on this earth, despite who else he’s faced in this world…..”
He stared firmly at the host with electric green eyes.
“D has never faced someone like Steve Awesome.”
The host swoons.
“Oooh. I got goosebumps. Anyone get goosebumps?”
She laughs and fans herself.
“Um, so how about EVK? How does she play into all this? Are you two a thing? Are you single?”
“Listen, D, EVK, LBGTKO, LMNOP, whatever letters want to step up, that title is mine. And besides, to be honest, I actually have a crush on Eli Dresden. Shh.”
All of a sudden Steve’s phone starts to go off.
“Oh damn. My bad y’all. I should have turned this off.”
The camera catches the screen as the messages fly in from his “girlfriend” Zelda Knite.
*Ding*
Where are you!?
*Ding*
What are you doing!?
*Ding*
Why are you cheating!?
*Ding*
I’m already burning your stuff you asshole!
*Ding*
A picture of Zelda laughing maniacally in front of a burning sofa with bags of clothes on top!
The host can see through her monitor.
“Relationship problems?”
Steve quickly hides his phone from view.
“NO!”
“Okay, we will cut to commercial.”
Steve is seen walking from his car to his home he shared with Zelda. He saw his sofa and his things still smoldering in the yard. He just sighed and wondered what kind of useless argument awaited him inside.
But he found no one inside.
He looked and called out but no one was home.
“Hmm, guess I get a peaceful night for once.”
He sat down on the bed and fell asleep.
We open in a local Detroit radio station studio. Steve had his wireless headset on and was on one side and the pretty midday host was on the other. Steve leaned back in his chair as the host brought her listeners up to speed.
“So I got with me, The Face of the Franchise, NPW’s own, and number one contender for the Openweight Championship, Steve Awesome. He takes on the champion D at August at the Atlantic on August fifth. Tickets are on sale but it's going fast folks! So tell us Steve, what do you think makes you a better champion then D?”
Steve glances over and gives her a flirty smile.
“Well all you gotta do is look at him and look at me and you can answer your own question, sweetheart.”
He gives the in-house camera recording this a handsome model pose. The host giggles.
“I mean with me, not only do you get the looks and the talent, but you get marketability too. I’m somebody a company can put on their posters and be proud of. I’m somebody that can come out to the promo spots and the public appearances and be entertaining. I’m not afraid of the spotlight. I thrive in it.”
He clears his throat.
“Do you really think any company really wants to put a painted up voodoo weirdo on their billboards? You got some innocent old lady driving down 96, and she looks up and see’s “D’s” giant face looking down at her.”
You can see him pantomime driving as an old women. Stereotypically knuckles tight and as close to the wheel as possible. He mocks a frail and shrill old voice as “she” sees the billboard.
“OH SWEET LORD IN HEAVEN!”
He clutched at his heart.
“THAT GUY LOOKS FUCKIN STUPID AS HELL!”
He gets serious again.
“The old lady has a heart attack and dies in the middle of traffic and causes a multiple car pile up. Is that what you want, host lady?”
She giggles and bats her eyes.
“Tee hee. No.”
“I know Gus Arnold sure as hell doesn’t need that on his conscience. I definitely don’t. If I’m Champ, no old ladies have to die. Plus, can you tell me what type of public interview D can really make? I mean, what? You have to go to a haunted church every time? Then when you finally get there it’s just gonna be him peering through the shadows. Like…”
He pulls his sunglasses off and rolls his eyes in the back of his head. He speaks in gravelly Gollum voice.
“....the darkness within me….”
He and the host laugh together and Steve just rolls his eyes.
“Come on, I’d be a way better champion by a long, long margin. So tell me sweet cheeks, between the colorful juggalo, D or the Face of the Franchise Steve Awesome? Who would you want on top?”
“Umm, who would I want on top?”
The lustful host kept it professional even though her answer was sitting in the room with her.
“Ahem. Erm, well you still need to win the belt from the champion at The Atlantic. What do you think are your chances against this crafty veteran?”
Steve rubbed his chin.
“I’m actually kind of worried to tell you the truth. I don’t know if you saw but in his last promo, he said he was really mad now. So naturally I’m questioning everything I’ve ever done in life up to this point.”
He laughs out loud.
“I’m just kidding. I’m not going to smear the guy and act like he can’t get it done in the ring. I can rip on him all day but he is a champion and remained a champion for a reason. I’d be an idiot to not believe that D could beat me. The dude has years of experience in the ring and you can’t teach that, but…”
A sly grin and a shrug from the contender.
“I’m what some would call….a confident man. And to tell you the truth. I believe that I’m going to walk out of The Atlantic as the new Openweight Champion. Because for as good as D is, I believe that I’m better. I believe that I want it more. I believe in the however the hell long D has been farting around on this earth, despite who else he’s faced in this world…..”
He stared firmly at the host with electric green eyes.
“D has never faced someone like Steve Awesome.”
The host swoons.
“Oooh. I got goosebumps. Anyone get goosebumps?”
She laughs and fans herself.
“Um, so how about EVK? How does she play into all this? Are you two a thing? Are you single?”
“Listen, D, EVK, LBGTKO, LMNOP, whatever letters want to step up, that title is mine. And besides, to be honest, I actually have a crush on Eli Dresden. Shh.”
All of a sudden Steve’s phone starts to go off.
“Oh damn. My bad y’all. I should have turned this off.”
The camera catches the screen as the messages fly in from his “girlfriend” Zelda Knite.
*Ding*
Where are you!?
*Ding*
What are you doing!?
*Ding*
Why are you cheating!?
*Ding*
I’m already burning your stuff you asshole!
*Ding*
A picture of Zelda laughing maniacally in front of a burning sofa with bags of clothes on top!
The host can see through her monitor.
“Relationship problems?”
Steve quickly hides his phone from view.
“NO!”
“Okay, we will cut to commercial.”
Steve is seen walking from his car to his home he shared with Zelda. He saw his sofa and his things still smoldering in the yard. He just sighed and wondered what kind of useless argument awaited him inside.
But he found no one inside.
He looked and called out but no one was home.
“Hmm, guess I get a peaceful night for once.”
He sat down on the bed and fell asleep.
