Happy Birthday from The Best to The Best (DO NOT Score - CD)
Feb 2, 2019 4:14:47 GMT -5
Hyperion and Bobby Barratt like this
Post by anthonycaffrey on Feb 2, 2019 4:14:47 GMT -5
(NOTE: This is not one of my three for Card vs. Caffrey.)
We’re following behind the AXW Undisputed Champion, Anthony Caffrey, stumbling his way back into a hotel room after a long night. His dress shirt is uneven and somewhat unbuttoned. He takes a few attempts to slide his keycard into his door’s reader and enters inside his hotel room. It is a single bed hotel room. Caffrey reaches into the fridge and pulls out a box.
Caffrey acknowledges the camera as he places the box onto a table in the room. The AXW Undisputed Championship is further back on the table, and Caffrey opens the box for us: it’s a cake. He sticks “3” and “0” candles on the cake and lights it. He waves for the cameraman to go shut the lights off, which he does.
ANTHONY CAFFREY
This is when lesser men would make a wish.
Caffrey shakes his head.
CAFFREY
I won't be making a wish. I already have everything I want.
Caffrey reaches for the only thing that matters to him in the otherwise unoccupied hotel room: his AXW Undisputed Championship. The light coming off the candles partially light up Caffrey and the nameplate.
CAFFREY
When I came into the XHF, I promised everyone I would be World Champion by my birthday. Today’s the big day. February 2nd. Groundhog Day… my favorite shitty holiday.
Caffrey laughs.
CAFFREY
Every year I watch that stupid movie where Bill Murray gets caught in a repeating loop. Every year I check the morning news to see if Punxsutawney Phil saw his shadow. It’s super dumb, but aren’t all traditions?
Even in dim light, we can catch Caffrey rolling his eyes.
CAFFREY
It doesn’t matter if the groundhog sees his shadow or not --- its predictions are useless. It’s still gonna be cold as shit for the next two months. That’s how winter works. Now if you want spot-on predictions, you come to me.
Caffrey’s smug arrogance is on full display.
CAFFREY
I predicted I’d beat the #1 ranked wrestler in my company. I predicted I’d win the Scorpion Classic. I predicted I’d WIN the AXW Undisputed Championship! I predicted I would walk out of Supremacy STILL champion. I’m a FUCKING NOSTRADAMUS over here!
Caffrey bangs on the table with authority.
CAFFREY
For the past three months, I’ve been caught in an even worse loop. One by one I get sent the same idiots. Anomoly? Taken care of. Chaos? Check. Kosloff? Don’t even try me. There is no man I’ve faced since coming here that I haven’t beaten. I’ve been living my life as Mr. Repeat, but at Diamonds are Forever, I finally get a new challenge.
Caffrey rubs his hands at the opportunity.
CAFFREY
Chris Card, from what I understand, you’re the best that piece-of-shit AWF has to offer. That’s well and good, but here something you need to know: I'm the best wrestler in AXW. That’s true, but there’s no “in AXW” needed. I am The Best. Period. Full stop. No extra words needed.
Caffrey puts a hand up to clarify something.
CAFFREY
I can already hear some of you clamoring that the idiot running around with a Crown is better. Let me tell you idiots what the men whose ankles I’ve broken already know. It doesn’t matter what achievement you’ve accomplished before I even knew this network existed. Card, you’ll brag about your resume as if I care. You’ll work yourself into a false state of confidence just like every man before me. At the end of the day, all that matters is if you’re tapping to Dreams and Nightmares or the CAL.
Caffrey mimics what Card’ll be doing and taps on his table repeatedly. He smugly looks at the camera as he gestures to the cake.
CAFFREY
But Card, since you’re a lesser man, and perhaps more importantly, the lesser champion, I’ll spot you a kindness: my candles are still burning. You make a wish instead. You can wish for whatever you want. I’ll still be The Best. But really, go ahead. You can wish for things like peace, happiness, or maybe even the ability to accept that you’re a second-rate champion for a second-rate company.
Caffrey laughs and smiles his sinister smile. He pulls out two tickets from his pocket.
CAFFREY
In fact, while you think about your wish, I wanted to invite you to the Celebration of Caffrey so you could see what a real champion in a real company looks like. It’s in London on the 11th. I’ll have someone figure out how to get these two front tickets to you, I got them for you and a guest. I’d recommend bringing some kind of notepad with you. While it might hinder your enjoyment of the celebration, maybe you can take some notes and learn how to become a real champ.
Caffrey bangs on his championship again with his right hand. He throws it around his shoulder and gestures back to the cake.
CAFFREY
Now, you make your wish? Good. Now don’t tell anyone --- well, unless you tell people if your wish is to beat me at Diamonds are Forever. We both already know that one isn’t coming true.
We’re following behind the AXW Undisputed Champion, Anthony Caffrey, stumbling his way back into a hotel room after a long night. His dress shirt is uneven and somewhat unbuttoned. He takes a few attempts to slide his keycard into his door’s reader and enters inside his hotel room. It is a single bed hotel room. Caffrey reaches into the fridge and pulls out a box.
Caffrey acknowledges the camera as he places the box onto a table in the room. The AXW Undisputed Championship is further back on the table, and Caffrey opens the box for us: it’s a cake. He sticks “3” and “0” candles on the cake and lights it. He waves for the cameraman to go shut the lights off, which he does.
ANTHONY CAFFREY
This is when lesser men would make a wish.
Caffrey shakes his head.
CAFFREY
I won't be making a wish. I already have everything I want.
Caffrey reaches for the only thing that matters to him in the otherwise unoccupied hotel room: his AXW Undisputed Championship. The light coming off the candles partially light up Caffrey and the nameplate.
CAFFREY
When I came into the XHF, I promised everyone I would be World Champion by my birthday. Today’s the big day. February 2nd. Groundhog Day… my favorite shitty holiday.
Caffrey laughs.
CAFFREY
Every year I watch that stupid movie where Bill Murray gets caught in a repeating loop. Every year I check the morning news to see if Punxsutawney Phil saw his shadow. It’s super dumb, but aren’t all traditions?
Even in dim light, we can catch Caffrey rolling his eyes.
CAFFREY
It doesn’t matter if the groundhog sees his shadow or not --- its predictions are useless. It’s still gonna be cold as shit for the next two months. That’s how winter works. Now if you want spot-on predictions, you come to me.
Caffrey’s smug arrogance is on full display.
CAFFREY
I predicted I’d beat the #1 ranked wrestler in my company. I predicted I’d win the Scorpion Classic. I predicted I’d WIN the AXW Undisputed Championship! I predicted I would walk out of Supremacy STILL champion. I’m a FUCKING NOSTRADAMUS over here!
Caffrey bangs on the table with authority.
CAFFREY
For the past three months, I’ve been caught in an even worse loop. One by one I get sent the same idiots. Anomoly? Taken care of. Chaos? Check. Kosloff? Don’t even try me. There is no man I’ve faced since coming here that I haven’t beaten. I’ve been living my life as Mr. Repeat, but at Diamonds are Forever, I finally get a new challenge.
Caffrey rubs his hands at the opportunity.
CAFFREY
Chris Card, from what I understand, you’re the best that piece-of-shit AWF has to offer. That’s well and good, but here something you need to know: I'm the best wrestler in AXW. That’s true, but there’s no “in AXW” needed. I am The Best. Period. Full stop. No extra words needed.
Caffrey puts a hand up to clarify something.
CAFFREY
I can already hear some of you clamoring that the idiot running around with a Crown is better. Let me tell you idiots what the men whose ankles I’ve broken already know. It doesn’t matter what achievement you’ve accomplished before I even knew this network existed. Card, you’ll brag about your resume as if I care. You’ll work yourself into a false state of confidence just like every man before me. At the end of the day, all that matters is if you’re tapping to Dreams and Nightmares or the CAL.
Caffrey mimics what Card’ll be doing and taps on his table repeatedly. He smugly looks at the camera as he gestures to the cake.
CAFFREY
But Card, since you’re a lesser man, and perhaps more importantly, the lesser champion, I’ll spot you a kindness: my candles are still burning. You make a wish instead. You can wish for whatever you want. I’ll still be The Best. But really, go ahead. You can wish for things like peace, happiness, or maybe even the ability to accept that you’re a second-rate champion for a second-rate company.
Caffrey laughs and smiles his sinister smile. He pulls out two tickets from his pocket.
CAFFREY
In fact, while you think about your wish, I wanted to invite you to the Celebration of Caffrey so you could see what a real champion in a real company looks like. It’s in London on the 11th. I’ll have someone figure out how to get these two front tickets to you, I got them for you and a guest. I’d recommend bringing some kind of notepad with you. While it might hinder your enjoyment of the celebration, maybe you can take some notes and learn how to become a real champ.
Caffrey bangs on his championship again with his right hand. He throws it around his shoulder and gestures back to the cake.
CAFFREY
Now, you make your wish? Good. Now don’t tell anyone --- well, unless you tell people if your wish is to beat me at Diamonds are Forever. We both already know that one isn’t coming true.
Caffrey leans back and blows out the candles. The last thing we can see or hear is Caffrey’s smug laughter as the camera footage cuts.
