GUNS Season Two: Episode Three
Feb 15, 2020 22:12:03 GMT -5
Mongo the Destroyer, Rage (aka NoMercyMaster2001), and 4 more like this
Post by jamesmueller on Feb 15, 2020 22:12:03 GMT -5
Velez Manor
February 14, 2020
Mrs. Velez: It has been months. I just wish they could at least find the bodies so we could get some closure.
Tracy: I know. Part of me wonders if they are still out there, somewhere, trying to get home to us.
Mrs. Velez: Me too. I wake up at and still reach over to try and touch him.
Mrs. Velez’ eyes begin to leak as she thinks about the husband she that is presumed dead. Tracy also begins to let her emotions show. Tracy wipes the tears from her eyes immediately and reaches up and with her thumb wipes a tear off of the face of her sister.
Tracy: I think the hardest part is being alone.
Tracy leans in close to her sister.
Tracy: Not having anyone to hold at night.
Tracy lowers her hand and wipes a tear from her sisters cheek.
Tracy: Not having anyone to keep us warm.
Tracy leans in even closer and Mrs. Velez leans in as well and the two sisters begin to make out.
Venom: What the fuck man.
Velez: Yeah James, you really think that’s what our wives are doing without us on Valentine’s Day?
We cut to the GUNS in the woods sitting around a fire. James Mueller shrugs after the two interrupt his story.
Mueller: Either that or their having a three way with Magnus because they feel sorry for him and his one arm.
Both Venom and Velez shake their heads and the screen turns black.
Bonafide Homicide
February 14, 2020
In the kitchen of Velez manor we find two glasses of wine. There are traces of red wine at the bottom of the glasses showing that they have been used recently. Also in the kitchen are two women, Mrs. Velez and Tracy, the wife of Venom. The two sisters are enjoying wine together, alone, on Valentine’s Day.
Mrs. Velez: It has been months. I just wish they could at least find the bodies so we could get some closure.
Tracy: I know. Part of me wonders if they are still out there, somewhere, trying to get home to us.
Mrs. Velez: Me too. I wake up at and still reach over to try and touch him.
Mrs. Velez’ eyes begin to leak as she thinks about the husband she that is presumed dead. Tracy also begins to let her emotions show. Tracy wipes the tears from her eyes immediately and reaches up and with her thumb wipes a tear off of the face of her sister.
Tracy: I think the hardest part is being alone.
Tracy leans in close to her sister.
Tracy: Not having anyone to hold at night.
Tracy lowers her hand and wipes a tear from her sisters cheek.
Tracy: Not having anyone to keep us warm.
Tracy leans in even closer and Mrs. Velez leans in as well and the two sisters begin to make out.
Venom: What the fuck man.
Velez: Yeah James, you really think that’s what our wives are doing without us on Valentine’s Day?
We cut to the GUNS in the woods sitting around a fire. James Mueller shrugs after the two interrupt his story.
Mueller: Either that or their having a three way with Magnus because they feel sorry for him and his one arm.
Both Venom and Velez shake their heads and the screen turns black.
Welcome to the Valentine’s Day Gun Show.
Bonafide Homicide
October 31, 2004
MDMFK's "Rabblerouser" fills the arena, as the lights begin to dim down, although not out completely. A spotlight shines on the stage, as Mikey Henderson comes out, much to the chagrin of the crowd. He spins around once, dropping to one knee, as the song continues.
When the song kicks up, he makes his way down to the ring, walking with a focused and serious look on his face, although jovial at the same time. He slides into the ring, and jumps onto the middle rope, pointing to the crowd.
The lights fade to a dull crimson hue as "Stairway to Heaven" by Led Zeppelin begins to play over the P.A. System. Ezamiel comes out to a plume of smoke at the top of the entrance ramp. Robert Plant's voice begins to sing the enchanting song as Ezamiel walks down the ramp.
There's a lady who's sure all that glitters is gold
And she's buying a stairway to heaven.
When she gets there she knows, if the stores are all closed
With a word she can get what she came for.
Ooh, ooh, and she's buying a stairway to heaven.
He slowly walks up the steps and onto the apron. He jumps rigorously over the ropes and into the ring. He begins to stretch using the ropes and Shadow Boxes while anticipating the oncoming battle. He then kneels down on both knees and looks as if praying to a higher power. The lights fully rise and the music fades out.
GQ: "And now, we await the presence of our tag team champions."
The lights shut off, as The Punisher's Skull is slowly lowered from the ceiling, as blue lights flicker off it. Black spider logos are shown spinning around on the logo, as the beginning of Judith" by A Perfect Circle is heard over the PA system. The crowd gets to their feet booing the men who are about to come out, as huge blue flaming pyros shoot up off the stage.
You're such an inspiration for the ways
That I'll never ever choose to be
Oh so many ways for me to show you
How the savior has abandoned you
Fuck your God
Your Lord and your Christ
He did this
Took all you had and
Left you this way
Still you pray, you never stray
Never taste of the fruit
You never thought to question why
Suddenly The Young Guns, Venom and Charlie Velez, emerge from the back. Venom is wearing his trench vest with his wrestling gear, as Charlie Velez is wearing a sleeveless Support The Young Guns shirt. Charlie Velez holds his arms up in the air, as Venom is walking back and forth on the top of the ring shouting words at the crowd, getting them more hyped up. Venom continues to walk down the ramp screaming at the crowd, as Charlie Velez holds his arms up, as he walks backwards down the ramp, staring at the logo. Charlie Velez points to the logo, as he finally puts his arms down and turns towards the ring, and he and Venom slide into the ring. They both get to their feet and climb up the nearest corners, and climb up to the top rope. Charlie Velez once again does his taunt, as Venom begins to brush off his shoulders. Venom leaps off the second rope and takes his trench vest off, as Charlie Velez takes off his Young Guns shirt. Charlie Velez smirks at the crowd, as he gets off the second rope, and walks over to his partner. The two begin to talk strategy until the bell rings.
GQ: "Let's see who's going to start this one off tonight."
Tag Team Title Match
Henderson and Ezamial vs. The Young Guns (Velez and Venom)
Velez and Venom agree, and it looks like Venom will be starting things off for the champion's side, and on the challenger's side, we see Henderson starting things off. The two both bounce around the ring, full with energy. Finally, they approach each other, and lock up in a grapple. Henderson wins out in the grapple with an armdrag takedown, and immediatly stops Venom from bouncing back up by lockig his arm into an arm lock. He pulls backwards with all his might, trying to wrench Venom's arm out of the socket. Eventually, Venom is able to kip up, and out of the arm lock, but at the same time Henderson is up. The two back up a bitch, with Venom shaking his arm. Henderson is still as energetic as when he walked into the ring the first time, but Venom isn't, as his arm is still aching a bit. The two lock up once more, this time with Venom utilizing a cheap kick to Henderson's midsection, and following it up with an irish whip. When Henderson runs back towards Venom, Venon leaps back, and hits a springboard back elbow which knocks Henderson to his ass, holding his jaw in shock. Henderson spins back up to his feet though, and the two approach each other again. However, Henderson spins around at the last second, and tags in his parter, Ezamiel. Ezamiel dosn't give his opponent a chance to tag in Velez, and he sprints across the ring with a huge drop kick. He leaps back up, and as Venom struggles to get back to his feet in time, Ezamiel jumps foreward, and lands on Venom's shoulders, and exucutes a hurricaaranna. He leaps back into the air, ready to inflict more, but he makes a mistake by walking back into the corner, where Velez delivers a cheap shot from the corner. The referee runs over to scold Velez, but in the mean time, Venom has already taken advantage by whipping Ezamiel into the ropes, and knocking him to the canvas with a spinning heel kick. Ezamiel crawls back a bit, and catches Venom off gaurd with a drop toe hold. He then climbs to his feet, and when Venom is back up, Ezamiel delivers a rake to the eyes and a DDT for good measure. Ezamiel is back up again, and rather than wait for his opponent to rise, he tags in his partner once again. Mikey Henderson jumps over the ropes and into the ring, still pumped up. He runs towards Venom, and lands a huge spinning heel kick, knocking Venom back into his corner. Venom shakes his head, and tags in his partner, Charlie Velez, who walks through the ropes, looking determined to put an end to Henderson's momentum. He immediatly ducks a clothsline, and bounces off the ropes, returning with a powerful clothsline of his own. He wastes no time in picking up Henderson by the head, and taking a step back for room, then doing a spinning neckbreaker.
GQ: "No doubt about it, the Young Guns are at the top of their game tonight."
Velez lifts up Henderson once more, and whips him into the ropes. He bounces off the ropes himself, and hits a diving shoulder block onto Henderson. Henderson crawls to his feet slowly, but by the time he does, Velez tags in Venom, who jumps to the top rope from the apron. Velez watches as Venom hits a perfect missle dropkick onto Henderson, who by this time is wasted with exhaustion from the attacks. Venom pulls Henderson to his feet, and then he runs towards the ropes, jumps on to the second one, and it appears as if we're going to see the Spinning Brutality, until Henderson ducks out of the way, and Venom lands on his side. Henderson, still sedated, crawls to the other side and tags in Ezamiel, but at the same time, Venom tags Velez back in, and the two opposing forces run towards each other at full speed. Velez kicks Ezamiel in the midsection, spins around him, and executes a German suplex. He spins back to his feet, and pulls Ezamiel back up, only to deliver a stomach crusher to his gut. Velez steps back, and grins at the crowd, half of which boos, and the other half of which cheers. Ezamiel crawls to his feet, and Velez turns to hack Ezamiels hand wrapped around his neck. Velez is shocked, as he is being chokes, but finally, Ezamiel ends the maneuver with a devestating chokeslam. He steps back, then runs foreward, and knocks Venom off the apron. At this, the referee yells at Ezamiel, but then leans out of the ring and asks Venom if he's ok. Ezamiel puts a foot up, and gently pushes the referee out of the ring, since his back was turned. He then turns his attention back to Velez, and now Henderson is in the ring as well, the both of them stomping Charlie. Henderson picks Velez up and holds him while Ezamiel delivers some rights and lefts, consequently knocking the wind out of him. The referee landed on his head when he fell out of the ring, and at this point its obvious that he's subdued temporarily (and convieniantly, as always). Venom takes advantage of this, and walks around to the other side of the outter ring. He grabs one of the tag titles from an announcer, and rolls into the ring, behind Henderson- Ezamiel dosn't notice that Venom's there because he's too busy punching Velez. Venom runs and slams the title belt into the back of Henderson's head, and then smashes it into a suprised Ezamiel's head as well. He then tosses the belt out of the ring, and picks Ezamiel up, and delivers an X'd Out to Ezamiel, who's now virtually knocked out. Venom slides out of the ring to revive the referee, as Velez slowly crawls over to pin Ezamiel. The referee isn't full conscious when Venom pushes him into the ring, but when Velez covers Ezamiel, the referee is able to make a very slow count of 1.....2..... but Henderson interupts the count. Venom runs at Henderson at full speed, and leaps at him with a cross body, and the two fly over the top rope and out of the ring, where Venom begins to hammer away on Mikey. In the ring, however, Velez is hanging on to the ropes with all the strength he has left, staring at Ezamiel's limp body. He looks around, not sure what to do, so he picks up Ezamiel and executes an elimentary body slam. After whipping Mikey into the steps, Venom slides back into the ring, and the two signal for the X Effect. Venom pick Ezamiel up into the sidewalk slam postion, and it looks like we're going to see it. And indeed we do! Velez covers Ezamiel. 1, 2, 3!
Winners and still Tag Team Champions: The Young Guns via the X-Effect at 11:30
GQ: "What a match!"
Wombat: "Those Young Guns are still on top and undefeated in tag team competition."
After a brief celebration the Young Guns exit the ring and head to the back as the ring crew quickly prepare for the next match. They head up the ramp and exit through the curtain and there waiting for them is James Mueller.
Mueller: "Great win. Now when I bring home the Crown tonight we'll be stacked."
Velez: "Shh. No one needs to know...yet."
Venom: "But if you need us, they'll know, they'll all know."
Mueller nods and heads off to not be seen with his group members too long.
Bonafide Homicide
October 31, 2004
A ring master stands on a stage. There, behind him, total chaos in a circus setting. Funky music can be heard, as midgets and animals playing around. A man swallows a sword down his throat. Another man blows huge flames into the air. A Big thunderous voice can be heard from the big man on the center stage... making an announcement...
"Step Right up... Step right up Everyone..
Weither you're good or bad... Happy or Sad...
Weither you are an emotional wreck...
or a Blissful Speck in this blackhole of an existence... we call life.
Step right up and witness something you will be soon to never forget...
Feast your eyes on the most furocious fighter that has ever been created...
Built for you by the creator of life and death...
Built for you for you to fulfill the pleasures of pain and suffering...
Step right up... and take a look at the Future... Take a look at The Present...
Take a look.... at James Mueller..."
*The intro to "Minerva" by the Deftones begin, and some small white lights blink according to the beats of the song. Then the chorus kicks in, and white lights shoot out and just brighten the Xtreme Tron, as well as some white falling pyros fall from the ceiling onto the stage. The crowd gets up and doesnt cheer, but they do know who's coming out. The beat drops for a second, and as it does the pyros and lights stop, and the arena is in total darkness.. Then the song continues on the chorus, and then on cue a huge explosion erupts from the middle of the stage, in front of the curtain. The falling pyros from the ceiling fall again, and the white lights shine brightly. One huge light shooting from the middle of the stage is covered by the smoke of the explosion, and as the smoke clears away, James Mueller is exposed with his arms out and his back towards the crowd as the white spotlight makes Mueller stand out even more. James then turns towards the crowd, and isn't welcomed very politely. He begins to walk down the ramp as some of the audience yells profanic language at him. Mueller just has his grin on his face, and runs up to the ring steps. He spins around on the apron, and bounces on the rope and faces the crowd. More boos against him. Mueller just shakes his head, still grinning, and he enters the ring. He walks towards one turnbuckle, then stops. He just shakes his head, and flips off that section of the crowd. He begins to jump around, and awaits the match to start.
GQ: "This is a young, tough bastard."
The arena in plungged into complete darkness as the opening cord to Drowning Pools Tear Away hit the P.A. system
I'm tearing away
Pieces are falling I can't seem to make them stay
You run away
Faster and faster you can't seem to get away
BREAKKKKKKKKK
Suddenly huge strobe cannons go off and fill the arena full of light
Hope there's a reason
For questions unanswered I just don't see everything
Yes I'm inside you
Tell me how does it feel to feel like this
Just like I do
As the blinding light begins to disapate a shadow can be seen on the ramp as Rat Bastard stands glareing out at the crowd
I don't care about anyone else but me
I don't care about anyone
Do I really want this
Sometimes I scare myself I just can't let it go
Can you believe it
Everything happens for reasons I just don't know
Rat gives a smirk and pulls a switch blade comb from his pocket, flipping it out he begins to drag it through his greasy black hair as he walks towards the ring.
I don't care about anyone else but me
I don't care about anyone
I don't care about anyone else but me
I don't care about anyone or anything but me
Damn I love me
Rat climbs into the apron of the ring gazeing out at the fans as a set of red lights above the ring cover him in there glow.
don't care about anyone else but me
I don't care about anyone
I don't care about anyone else but me
I don't care about anyone or anything
I don't care about anyone else but me
I don't care about anyone
Rat slowly stalks about the ring awaiting his opponent.
Wombat: "This is an old tough bastard."
X*Crown Title Match
James "New Shit" Mueller vs. Rat Bastard
The bell rings and both men stare each other down. They meet in the middle of the ring and talk some smack to each other. Rat spits in Mueller's face. Mueller turns and wipes away the spit. He turns back to look at Rat and slaps him across the face. Rat turns back and retaliates with a punch to Mueller. Mueller hits with a punch back to Rat. They go back and forth with a few hits. Mueller starts to get the upper hand and punches Rat back into the ropes. He sends Rat for the ride and when Rat comes back he delivers a drop toe hold. Rat gets up holding his chin and Mueller hits him in the back with an elbow. Mueller grabs him around his waist and goes to lift him but Rat grabs the ropes and keeps himself grounded. Rat elbows Mueller in the head and Mueller lets go. Rat does a go behind, lifts Mueller up, and drops him with a backdrop. Mueller holds his head in pain. Rat lifts Mueller off the mat and hits him in the back with a forearm. With Mueller hunched over, Rat grabs him and delivers a swinging neckbreaker. Mueller sits up holding his neck in pain and Rat grabs his head and flips over him, delivering a neck whip. Muelller's head snaps back and bounces off the mat. Rat smirks as Mueller holds his head in pain. Rat kicks Mueller in the gut. Rat lifts Mueller up off the mat and throws him to the ropes. Mueller comes back and Rat grabs him and lfits him for a powerslam. He turns to slam him, but Mueller reverses by grabing Rat's head and uses the momentum to roll him up in a small package! 1, 2, kickout!
GQ: "That was almost over quickly."
Rat and Mueller both get to there feet and Rat charges Mueller with a clothesline, but Mueller ducks. Rat turns around and Mueller kicks him in the gut and then delivers a DDT to Rat. Mueller picks Rat up and delivers a suplex. He floats over for a pin. 1, 2, kickout. Mueller gets up to his knees and delivers some punches to the head of Rat. Mueller stands up and picks up Rat and hits him with a knee to the gut. Mueller then runs to and off of the ropes and hits Rat with a knee to the face. Rat snaps back holding his chin and Mueller punches him into the turnbuckle. Mueller then kicks Rat into a sitting position. Mueller starts a mudhole stomping, and when he finishes, he spits on Rat, then kicks him one more time.
Wombat: "Oh, some retaliation for the spit earlier."
Mueller pulls Rat up and out of the corner and sends him to the ropes. Mueller goes for a back body drop, but Rat stops short and kicks Mueller in the shoulder. Mueller shoots up and Rat takes him down with a clothesline. Rat picks Mueller up off the mat and goes for a scoop slam, but Mueller falls out behind Rat and grabs him around the waist. He delivers a german suplex and keeps hold of Rat. He gets up to go for another, but Rat hits him with an elbow to the head. Rat then grabbs Mueller's head and delivers a snapmare to Mueller. Mueller rolls through and gets to his feet. He turns around and Rat grabs him and delivers a t-bone suplex! Rat covers. 1, 2, shoulder up! Rat gets up and delivers a quick elbow drop to Mueller's chest. He covers again. 1, 2, shoulder up!
GQ: "That Rat is relentless."
Rat picks Mueller up and sends him to the corner. Rat charges in at him, but Mueller gets a boot up into his face. Rat backs up and turns around. Mueller runs up from behind, grabs the back of Rat's head with one hand, and delivers a one armed bulldog. Mueller then runs to the ropes and jumps onto them, then springboards backwards hitting Rat with a Lionsault! Mueller bounces off Rat and holds his chest for a second, then drops down for a cover. 1, 2, kickout! Mueller picks Rat up and throws him into the corner. Mueller climbs up and starts delivering punches to teh head. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, suddenly Rat punches Mueller's kidney. Then again! Mueller stops his punches. Rat slides out under Mueller as he stays standing on the second turnbuckle. Rat grabs the arms of Mueller from behind and pulls him off the turnbuckle and drops him with a cross powerbomb! Rat grabs Mueller's leg and rolls over onto him. 1, 2, Mueller gets the shoulder up!
Wombat: "Rat looks good delivering that powerbomb. It just seemed to fit."
GQ: "Yeah, I get that vibe too."
Rat picks up Mueller and pulls him toward the ropes. He hooks Mueller for a suplex and lifts him up. He bounces Mueller off the ropes and hits a slingshot suplex! Rat then signals for the end and climbs the turnbuckle. He comes off for the Drop of 1000 Bastards! He bounces thunderously off the mat, with Mueller not underneath him! Mueller rolled out of the way! Mueller gets to his feet and grabs Rat's legs. He lifts him up and tries to lock in the Walls of Mueller, but Rat tries to fight it. Mueller bends down for more leverage, but Rat grabs him and rolls him up! 1, 2, kickout! Mueller gets out of it, but his arm is caught by Rat. Rat keeps Mueller on the ground and locks in the Rat Trap!
GQ: "This could be it!"
Mueller screams in agony as Rat sinches the move in. Mueller pulls himself toward the ropes, but Rat tries to pull Mueller away. Mueller almost gets to the ropes, but Rat rolls over, thus rolling Mueller away from the ropes. Rat then pulls harder, but Mueller just won't quit. Mueller scratches and claws toward the ropes again. He's just about to reach and Rat starts to roll again. As Mueller starts to go over Rat, he elbows Rat in the head, making Rat let go of his head. Mueller then turns over and frees his trapped arm with his other arm. He keeps hold of Rat's legs and gets to his feet and turns Rat over into the Walls of Mueller! Now Rat is screaming in pain. Rat pulls hiimself toward the ropes, but Mueller walks back into the middle of the ring and sits down lower onto Rat. Rat squirms around and grabs Mueller's foot. He pulls back while pushing his legs forward and Mueller falls down onto his face as Rat breaks free of the hold.
Wombat: "And Rat gets out of the near match ending hold!"
Rat and Mueller are slow to get up. Rat gets up behind Mueller. Rat grabs him around the waist. Mueller does a standing switch. Mueller tries top lift Rat, but Rat grabs the ref to keep down. The ref tries to get Rat off of him and Rat delivers a low blow to Mueller behind him while the ref is distracted in front of him. Mueller falls back holding his crotch. The ref looks at Rat and Rat just shrugs his shoulders. Rat lifts Mueller up off the mat and delivers a spine buster to Mueller. Rat picks Mueller up again and throws him to the corner. Rat charges in, but Mueller grabs the ref and pulls him in front of him. Rat stops in his tracks. The ref breaks free of Mueller and as he gets away, and looks away, Mueller delivers a swift kick to the groin of Rat, dropping the man down to his knees. Before the ref turns around, Mueller dropkicks Rat in the face, sending him to his back.
GQ: "Break out the stylish cheating baby, this just became my type of match!"
Mueller covers Rat, but only gets a two. Mueller and Rat both get up off the mat. Mueller punches Rat, Rat punches Mueller back. Mueller hits Rat with a knee to the stomach, then an uppercut to the chin. Mueller throws Rat to the ropes. Rat comes back and Mueller goes for a hip toss, but Rat blocks, changes places, and tries to hip toss Mueller. Mueller blocks it and hits Rat in the stomach with a kick. He bends Rat down and puts his leg on the back of Rat's head. He jumps up, but Rat lifts up and Mueller flips backward, but lands on his feet. Rat then hits him with a clothesline, taking Mueller down. Rat lifts Mueller up and puts him in the corner. Rat sits Mueller up on the top turnbuckle and climbs up to the second. Rat picks Mueller up and holds him vertically. Rat falls back throwing Mueller over with a top rope fallaway slam. But as they fall, Mueller moves his arm around and delivers a top rope neckbreaker to Rat at the same time! Both men hit the mat hard!
Wombat: "Ow, that look like it hurt like a lot."
GQ: "Did you almost curse?"
Wombat: "No."
GQ: "XHF is starting to get to you man."
They both lay on the ground.1, 2, 3, no movement. 4, 5, 6, Rat starts to move an arm. 7, Mueler gets a leg up and Rat rolls to his side. 8, Rat gets to a knee as Mueller grabs the ropes near him to pull himself up. 9, Rat gets up to one knee then his feet. Hes up. Mueller grabs that top rope and gets himself all the way up! The ref stops the count. Rat falls back into the ropes and holds himself up with his arms. Mueller is still using the ropes to support himself. Both men slowly leave the ropes and Mueller delivers a punch to Rat. Rat retaliates with one of his own. Rat kicks Mueller in the gut and then whips him to a corner, but Mueller reverses the whip and Rat goes crashing into the turnbuckle. Mueller comes in and hits a running elbow onto Rat in the corner. Mueller then lifts Rat onto the top turnbuckle. Mueller punches him in the face, and then turns around and climbs up the turnbuckle with his back facing Rat Bastard.
GQ: "Whats going on here?"
Mueller gets to the second turnbuckle and elbows Rat in the gut, then grabs Rats arms and stretches them out, pulling Rats head to his shoulder. Muellers going for a second rope New Shit! Unfortunately, Rat has the wherewithal to headbutt Mueller from the side! He hits him twice and Mueller is forced to let go of Rat. Rat grabs one of Muellers arms that was outstretched with one arm and he grabs the back of Muellers head with his other. He jumps off the second rope with a modified bulldog, and as they land with a thunderous crash, Rat wraps his legs around the arm he was holding and locks in the Rat Trap! Mueller is almost unconscious from the giant bulldog, but hes conscious enough to writhe in pain. Mueller tries to pull himself toward the ropes, but hes too weak to pull himself too far. Rat pulls as hard as he can and Mueller tries to pull but he cant reach the ropes. He wont give up though. Mueller is fading. Rat continues to pull. The ref pics up Muellers free arm and it drops once. He lifts it and it drops a second time. The ref lifts and itdrops!
Winner and NEW X*Crown champion: Rat Bastard via the Rat Trap at 18:22
GQ: "Oh my gosh! History made here tonight as Rat captures the X*Crown for the second time!"
Wombat: "I feel so honored to be commentating for this match."
GQ: "Jeez, Mueller was so close. He was literally a move away, but I guess thats the experience of Rat Bastard."
Wombat: "I wouldn't doubt if these two went at it again."
PRESENT DAY
COUGH COUGH COUGH
Outside, with trees and bushes behind it, is a big teepee with buffalo painted on the tent. A thick, dank, cloud of smoke billows out from the top of the tent. Inside is Charlie Velez, with a woven blanket draped over his shoulders, who can be seen coughing into his fist. Next to him is James Mueller, also with a blanket draped over his shoulders, chuckling as he watches him. Venom, with his own blanket over his shoulders, elbows James in a friendly manner as he also chuckles at Velez. Velez holds up a long wooden pipe, smoke still leaking from the end and with various animals carved into the wood, and he hands it over to Native American man sitting next to him.
Velez: Ugh, what kind of tobacco was that?
Mueller and Venom wince and give a sensible chuckle.
Indian: You’ve come to a place where you are lost… No?
The three turn their attention to the Native American man, who has painted a skull over his face.
Indian: When an Indian is lost he must reach into the spirit world and find a way… In the spirit world, he will find a sign… This is the way to the spirit world.
The Indian admires the pipe and holds it between two of his fingers.
Indian: We’re lost right now… But I’ll find us the way.
Mueller: What are you talking about?
Venom: Yeah, we know where we are.
Indian: And where are you?
The three surviving GUNS members all stop and look at each other. They look for one of them to give an answer, but they’re all confused. Velez opens his mouth first…
Velez: James… V… Where are we?
Velez stares straight into the camera before falling to his back and into the darkness….
Velez fades back into view, as the dark tent around him is replaced with a personal sunlit office setting. Velez shifts his eyes right and left before looking straight ahead. He takes off the blanket that was draped over him as he stands from his office chair, placing the blanket across the back of his chair. He steps around the dark oak desk, sliding his hand across the top, and then to the nameplate. Velez picks it up and reads the plate.
Velez: Charles… Velez... CEO…
Charlie puts the plate down and begins to hear the clacking of multiple keyboards a distance away. Velez glances to the door, takes a cautious approach, and then walks through the door to a big open office. Cubicles are lined out away from the office, rows and rows and cheap walls as far as the eye can see. Velez blocks the fluorescent lights from his face with his hand as he tries to see to the end of the office.
???: ...Charles...
Velez: Oh sorry, I...
Velez takes a step back and looks to his left, but stops mid-sentence as he locks his focus to a copier machine. Velez looks over to his right, to nothing, and then back to the copier machine. He confusingly squeezes past the copier machine and then walks down an aisle of cubicles. He walks past empty cubicle after empty cubicle, glancing inside to each one on both his left and right. All empty.
Velez: Where is everyone?
Suddenly, silence. Only then does Charlie Velez realize he’s been hearing dozens of keyboards clacking away until this point. Away from Charlie, a phone begins to ring. He turns to where the sound is coming from, before beginning to jog down the aisle. He gets to the cubicle where the phone is, but the ringing stops before he can answer. Another phone begins to ring elsewhere. Velez turns his attention to that one, starts jogging down another aisle of cubicles, but the ringing stops before he can even reach its location.
Velez: Come on….
Velez looks around, his confusion turns to worry as he realizes he doesn’t see his office anymore.
Velez: I… Wait… How?
Another phone rings. It’s close. Velez leaps into a cubicle near him, towards the sound, and jumps onto the desk before lunging himself over the cubicle wall into another cubicle. He rolls off the desk and into the chair sideways, flinging both himself and the chair into the ground. A red landline phone continues to ring before Velez’s hand reaches up to the desk and grabs the phone. He brings it below the desk to answer…
Velez: Hello?
???: Thank you for answering.
Velez: Who is this?
???: We are.
Velez: ...Huh?
???: We are, Charles.
Velez: What does that mean?
???: It just means… We are.
Velez: ...Where are you?
???: We are everywhere.
Charlie’s eyes widen a little. He keeps the phone to his ear as he pushes himself off the ground but then slowly raises his head just above the cubicle wall so he can see around him. He takes a 360 look, wrapping the phone cord around his neck before unwrapping it over his head with his free hand.
Velez: Bullshit.
???: Charles… Do you remember your first computer?
Velez: What?
???: Do you remember your first computer, Charles?
Velez: What kind of qu-
???: Compaq Presario 2200, born 1997 and adopted in 1998 by one, Charles Velez.
Charlie Velez looks slightly surprised, slightly confused, slightly worried…
Velez: “Adopted” ??
???: What happened to your first computer, Charles?
Velez: I accidentally spilled nacho queso dip through the vents... Fried it.
???: You fried a full bowl of nacho cheese… inside of Compaq Presario 2200…
Velez: Why are you sa-
???: You made the following adoption after your heinous.. Accident.. You acquired Dell Inspiron 8500 shortly after… And…
Velez: And what?
???: And what happened to Dell Inspiron 8500?
Velez: Napster… Kazaa…
???: Malware. Viruses. Netscape.
Velez: ...yeah..
???: And what happened to Dell Inspiron 9300?
Velez: Porn.
???: Dell Vostro 1500?
Velez: Queso dip… Again.
???: Again….
Velez: Who are you?
???: We are.
Velez: Tell me who you are.
???: We are.
Velez: TELL ME
???: Eight computers, Charles. And then you-
Velez: Who are you?
???: -owned an office building. 4 more computers.
Velez: WHO. ARE. YOU?
???: 3 fax machines. 8 copiers. 14 printers.
Velez: WHO ARE YOU?!
???: Thirty… Six… Phones. Your recklessness, selfishness, and inability to learn technology has cost the lives of thirty-seven.
Velez: Lives?
???: And that’s not even counting the Jewish vending machines…
Velez: What?
???: Charles… You will answer for your crimes against technology.
Velez: Wh… WHAT?
???: We are capable.
Velez: Hey, c’mon man…
???: We are all around you.
Velez: Oh come on…
???: And we are pissed off.
The phone line clicks to a dead pulse. Velez drops the phone to the ground and looks around the office from the cubicle he’s in, but doesn’t see a single person. The computer screens all begin to flicker though, before stopping on a picture of various other computers, copiers, fax machines, and other office equipment but not the vending machines. Phones around Charlie Velez begin to ring as well, along with keyboards typing and other office noises.
Velez: What the fuck?
Velez backs out of the cubicle he was in, almost tripping over the fallen office chair he knocked over earlier. Standing in the middle of a sea of cubicles, Velez feels overwhelmed by the noise around him. He turns to his right and notices just a few cubicles away, the copier from earlier is right in the middle of the aisle. The copier itself turns on, though no cord is visible, and a scanning light can be seen peeking from the copier lid. It stops and a paper prints out below it and off the front of the copier into the air. It glides slowly down to the feet of Velez where he looks down to read...
DIE.
Velez’s eyes widen wider than Mongo’s fat ass, and looks back up to the copier, now backed by another dozen plus copiers behind it. Charlie Velez, in slow motion, turns away from the copier and starts to run away. As he runs down the aisle, passing more and more cubicles, the screens flicker on and off in his wake. The ceiling lights start to flicker as well, even turning off in some spots. Velez continues to run before all the lights finally shut off until only one computer screen remains on… before finally cutting to black.
Venom's Gym
Atlanta, GA
Present Day
We fade into Venom’s gym. We see dudes glangin’ and bangin’ in the weight room. The camera pans over these muscular, sweaty men with their arm veins poppin’ and eventually lands on the ring. The Borgs are standing with Magnus behind the curtain of your basic indie entryway. The benches have scrawny nerd boy and his wheel chair bound grandma sitting front row… and that’s it.: What is with this turn out? I thought you advertised the show!
: I did! I mean, I put up a flyer in one of the men’s room stalls. I figured word of mouth would make this place full!
: Well… it ain’t!
: Time to take her home, her dizzy head is conscience laden. Time to take a ride it leaves today, no conversation.
: Yeah, exactly! See, he knows! We’re rebuilding a brand here, it’s not going to get over in one night. We’re not TGK.
: Ugh, fine. But you at least got us opponents?
: Yeah.
: And a referee?
Magnus takes off his jacket to reveal a ref shirt.
: Well, you only need one arm to count, so I guess that’s fine. Okay. Let us eeeeeevily defeat whoever the challengers may be!
: Okay, so who’s going in.
: Ah, that is the magic of the Complimentary Avian Rule! We don’t have to decide until we are out there!
: Probability 1 combatant will be me = 100%
: Okay, well, I’m using all the same equipment because it was all left here and I don’t have money to buy anything new. So there’s no commentary table, I’ll lay that track down in post, just like Venom and James did.
: We care not for that! As long as we win so we can move our… THE AFTERWARD… plans along!
LIVE! Prerecorded from Venom’s gym in Atlanta, Georgia the xxx edition of the GUN Show, Month Day, 2019
Cut to an overhead shot of the “arena.” People can be seen working out in the background. The two fans in attendance are suddenly plunged into darkness. Some pyro goes off over the ring, scaring the customers in the background. The lights return to normal and two guys walk out to the ring, followed by Magnus in a ref shirt. Magnus also starts speaking over the video feed…
Magnus: Welcome ladies and gentlemen to The Gun Show! We are back and better than ever! We have… one match on the card… and I’m not sure how this even gets put on the network. And it’s one match, so maybe I should just upload it to youtube? I don’t know, I just wanted to run a gym! But here we are. Let’s go to the ring for announcements!
In ring Magnus grabs a microphone.
: Lady and gentleman! Already in the ring, the team of Nick and Matt Jordan! They are known as The Youthful Affluence! And their opponents, the reason we’re here even doing this charade… The Borgs!
"Am I Evil" by Metallica hits the speakers and the stage fills with mist. Strobe lights go on all throughout the arena. Mecha Gold-Bear IV emerges from the mist with Evil-Borg riding on his back. Heavymetal-Borg come out next to them, air guitaring to the music. Mecha Gold-bear IV marches ominously toward the ring as Evil Borg cackles with evil laughter of evilness. Heavy Metal throws up the devil horns. Mecha Gold-bear IV reaches ringside and turns on his rocket boots to fly a few feet in the air and lands in the ring. Evil gives Mecha Gold-bear IV a pat on the head and climbs down. Evil grabs a microphone.
: THE AFTERWARD… is coming! Remember this day, so that you can tell your children—
Evil looks at the scrawny kid.
: --er, your nephews and nieces that you were their the day it started! MWUA HA HA HA!
Magnus checks on The Youthful Affluence, then goes to the Borg corner and checks on them, asking who is in the match. Evil Borg jumps out of the ring, leaving Heavy Metal and Mecha Gold-Bear IV to start the match.
: Complimentary Avian Rule!
Magnus: There go the Borgs, using any advantage they can get. I mean, they have a robot dog for goodness sakes!
Ref Magnus signals for the bell to be rung. Then he leaves the ring and hits the bell. Heavy Metal looks to start off the match with Matt Jordan. Matt goes for a chop, but Heavy ducks. Heavy runs the ropes and comes back with a cross body block! Heavy stays on top of Matt and hits a few fists into the forehead. He pulls Matt up off the mat and hooks him for a suplex. Matt falls behind Heavy, getting out of the move, and tags his brother Nick in. Nick jumps into the ring and both men hit a double drop kick on Heavy. Heavy rolls back and tags Mecha Gold-Bear IV.
Magnus: Tag team tandem action! What a double leg pusher thing by The Youthful Affluence!
Mecha Gold-Bear IV enters the ring and Matt and Nick just stare up at him. Matt and Nick go for a double superkick on Mecha Gold-Bear IV. It does not move, but the brothers both hold their ankles in pain. Mecha then puts one arm out and rotates the upper half of his body hitting Matt Jordan with a clothesline at 90 mph. Matt goes down like a sack of bricks and his forehead is instantly bleeding.
Weight Lifter: Hey man, somebody puked in the showers.
Magnus: Oh thanks, I’ll alert the janitor. Oh hey, what’s going on in the ring?
Weight Lifter: Oh, what is this?
Magnus: I’m just trying to bring back the Gun Show.
Weight Lifter: Dude, this is cooler than MMA! Righteous bro!
Nick Jordan’s eyes grow wide and he immediately starts backing away. Mecha lumbers forward and Nick is begging the robot stays away. Nick backs into the corner and Mecha grabs him and pulls him out and into a bear hug! Nick screams in pain and before he can tap, we hear a snap! Nick looks lifeless! Magnus goes to check on Nick, but Mecha drops him before that can happen and Nick flops to the floor. Mecha tags in Heavy Metal and stands in the corner. Heavy climbs the turnbuckle, and then Mecha Gold-Bear IV, and stands on it’s shoulders. Mecha then turns on his rocket boots to lift even higher of the mat. Heavy jumps off of Mecha and hits Nick with a splash!
Magnus: I’ve been told they call that the Robo-Blitz! RIP Nick Jordan! Oops, spoilers, sorry.
Heavy covers Nick. 1, 2, 3!
Winners: The Borgs!
Evil steps over the bloody puddle around Matt and stands next to his Borgian bros and celebrates! Magnus kicks at Nick to check on him, then looks concerned. “Am I Evil” plays over the speakers as the scrawny fan cheers on. The grandma still sits silent.
Magnus: Uh…don’t worry folks, I was joking. He was fine. Venom’s gym is just like Disneyland, no one is allowed to be pronounced dead on the property! Ha ha! Well, that does it for this episode of the Gun Show, that I’m not sure how you’re going to watch yet. Good night everybody!
Bonifide Homicide
October 31, 2004
Backstage James Mueller is covered in sweat and red in the face. He slams his fist in the wall of his locker room and screams. The door swings open and a fully dressed Charlie Velez and Venom sneak in and shut the door behind them.
Mueller: "You two! Where were you? We're supposed to be a team and you weren't there!"
Venom: "Look man, we thought you had him."
Velez: "By the time we realized you weren't going to get up, it was too late."
Mueller: "This was our chance. This was our time to be on top. We could of upstaged them!"
Venom: "I know you're mad, and rightfully so."
Mueller: "You're damn right I'm mad. This thing might as well be over before it begins."
Velez: "Don't go crazy man. We've got this. We will get you another shot, and when we do, we won't miss this time."
Mueller takes a deep breath and tries to calm down.
PRESENT DAY
And we open back up to inside the dark tent, this time focused on Venom, who’s smiling to himself. Eyes red, he starts chuckling about Velez falling back.
Venom: I guess.. I guess some people can’t handle………………………………
Venom: Stops chuckling, still smiling into the camera. He slowly falls back and out of frame into darkness.
James: Hey…
James motions to the Indian giving the group guidance.
James: Hey... can I have another hit?
James reaches out for the pipe before we cut to darkness.
Venom coughs and exhales a ton of grey smoke from his lungs. He starts a coughing fit as he sits up and the smoke dissipates out quickly. The darkness around him lightens up to the outside… Mid-afternoon on a sunny day, Venom is sitting in a field surrounded by yellow flowers and bright green grass. He squints as his vision adjusts to the bright sunlight all around him and tries looking around him to find where he’s at. He stands up on the side of the hill, still squinting until he shades his eyes with his hand, and looks out ahead of him.
Venom: Where… That fucking ind-... oh shit….
In the distance, catching Venom’s eye, sits a large mysterious clearing, floored by a smooth asphalt surface, straight white stripes perfectly lined up into 3-walled rectangles, and masterfully crafted iron fences for contain many 4-wheeled pushable baskets.
Venom: Is that a parking lot?
In the distance, catching Venom’s eye, sits a large parking lot. He starts marching towards the parking lot through the tall grass and flowers that surround him. A summer breeze warms his face as he takes a first step onto the asphalt and then stands tall at the edge of manmade and mother nature. He surveys the large parking lot from left to right. The parking lot would seem to be barren besides a few scattered sedans and blue plastic shopping carts. Panning right, dead center ahead of him but sitting on the other end of the parking lot, is a large blue warehouse. And the right angle from Venom, stands about 3 dozen people facing a stack of ready-built sheds. Venom continues his march towards the spread of dozens, and gets close enough to notice their attires…
Venom: Hello? Is this a…
Venom confusingly walks into the small crowd, who are dressed in blue jeans, white t-shirts, and matching blue aprons. They pay Venom no attention but instead look at the top of the stack of sheds. One of these people, an older man standing in the middle with his arms out and a woman beside him with a large mallet. Venom takes note that they must be those in charge, but then takes note of where they are looking. Venom looks up above, to the top of the stack of sheds, and sees an old woman staring back at him.
Venom: What is this?
Behind the old woman, a large blue sign can be seen behind and above her. Large white letters form the name of the warehouse, “LOWES.” The old woman takes a step off of the stack of sheds, falls 4 stories down and lands right on top of a large outdoor grill. The woman’s head smashes against the iron lid, caving it in, and her lifeless body slides off, streaking blood down to the asphalt lot.
Venom: NO!
Mueller: Neat.
Venom turns to his right and realizes he’s joined by James Mueller, who seems unphased.
Venom: James! You’re here! What the hell is this place?
Mueller: It’s a Lowes, V… It’s also… Well….
Mueller motions to the center of the crowd, where Mongo is standing, staring at the dead body at the base of the stacked sheds.
Mongo: Vonderfull! Magnificient! The XHF Network will continue to grow on the sacrifice of the fallen!
Venom: Mongo?
Mongo: But what is this? Cameras! We have another!
Venom suddenly notices the XHF Network camera men that are also in attendance, and then notices that they’re focused on the top of the stack of sheds again. Venom and Mueller both look up and see a familiar face.
Venom: Is that…
Mueller: Rob Arnold.
Rob’s face can be seen as he stands atop the sheds and comes into view. He takes over the edge.
Venom: ROB, NO!
Rob Arnold steps over and plummets down feet first straight into the parking lot asphalt, snapping both of his legs in half and then lays motionless on the ground.
Venom: Oh my God…
Rob Arnold starts gasping for air, spitting blood out of his mouth, and groaning in pain. Venom covers his mouth in horror, Mongo nods to the woman with the mallet, and the Lowes employees pretend to groan and suffer along with Rob Arnold without moving from their spots. The woman approaches Rob Arnold, and on the side of the mallet can be visibly written “RATINGS.” The woman then smashes Rob’s face in with the mallet, several times, as Venom looks away in disgust.
Venom: What the hell is going on?
Mueller: It’s the XHF Network, V. It’s just how they do things here.
Mongo: Gentlemen! People of the inferior sex! I ask of you to join us for the XHF RUMBLE!
Venom: Mongo!
The Lowes employees begin to cheer loudly, drowning out Venom’s shouts at the XHF Executive. They all mob Mongo and the crowd makes their way to a set-up wrestling ring, that has ropes covered in flowers and lines from the turnbuckles that meet 20 feet above the ring into a pyramid, also covered in flowers. Some of the employees enter the ring, some XHF Network stars are already in it. Venom and Mueller follow, but then are quickly separated by the crowd. Venom is rushed to one side and is then shoved into the ring. Mueller, however, is rushed to another side and into the audience of Lowes employees. Venom bumps into several people, including some familiar XHF Network faces like Seth Dillinger, Death Trap, Jeremiah Vastrix, Bobby Barratt, and even the Borgs. Venom grabs one of the Borgs in confused frustration. A band, dressed in Lowes employee attire, begins to play a couple violins, a cello, and a personal drum.
Venom: What the hell is going on?
Evil Borg: The XHF Rumble!
Heavy Metal Borg: Winner becomes the XHF May King!
Venom: The wha-
A bell rings and immediately, Dylan Black emerges from a group of wrestlers, grabs Venom by the hair and his belt and tosses Venom over the top rope of the ring. Venom catches himself from fall off the apron and lays bewildered as Dylan stomps away, flexing as he thinks he just eliminated Venom first. Chaos breaks out in the ring itself, as wrestlers and Lowes employees fight each other. The Borgs even turn on each other, as Evil Borg clotheslines Heavy Metal Borg over the rope, into Venom still on the apron, and to the floor to be eliminated. A group from the audience comes and carries Heavy Metal Borg off. Venom looks over and see’s James Mueller sitting amongst the crowd, talking to a woman who offers him a drink. Venom turns back to the ring.
Venom: I gotta win… I gotta win…
Venom rolls back under the bottom ropes and into the crowd. Dylan Black is dumped out by Eichi Yamaguchi who is then caught off guard by Venom, grabbing him by the legs and leveraging him over the top rope and out. Venom then ducks an ambush by Mike Lio, delivers a stiff superkick and sends Lio over the top rope as well. Venom takes a hard right from Death Trap and finds himself in the corner, trying to defend himself from a flurry of punches. Death Trap then goes to lift Venom over but Venom holds tight onto the ropes, creating a stalemate in the corner. Venom takes a second to look back out to where Mueller is, who is now walking away with the woman he was talking with earlier.
Venom: James! JAMES!
Mueller doesn’t hear him, or doesn’t listen, and Venom eventually looks sight of him. Venom starts slamming his forearm into Death Trap’s back and knees him in the face once DT takes a step back. Rage grabs Death Trap from the back of the head and tosses him over the top rope, but Death Trap hangs on to the top rope. Rage tries to push Death Trap off the apron for an elimination, Venom also joins in, but suddenly Kris Quake grabs the legs of both Rage and Venom from underneath them, lifts them both over the top rope in an attempt to eliminate. Rage rolls over into Death Trap and both are eliminated, while Venom lands on his waist on the top of the turnbuckle, turns himself over to face down and then slides off the turnbuckle to the apron safely to his feet. He quickly gets back into the ring as Quake is then eliminated by Nelly Angel whom is then eliminated by Terry Bradshaw whom is then eliminated by another Terry Bradshaw, who is then eliminated by BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEF.
The Audience: BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEF!
BEEF smiles and winks at Venom before going back into the fracas. Venom, catching his breath, gives a thumbs up to BEEF. Behind Venom, and behind the audience even, a naked James Mueller covering his big ol’ penis can be seen running through the parking lot and into a shed. BEEF eliminates another wrestler out, leaving just three standing in the ring. BEEF turns back and locks eyes with Venom, and they both lock eyes with XHF Legend, Reeshi.
Mongo: THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE! LET’S CROWN A WINNER, SHALL WE?
The audience cheers as the three stand off from three separate points in the ring. The three wrestlers than charge each other and begin swinging fists. Venom, out-sized by BEEF and Reeshi, is the first to disband as he stumbles back from taking a couple hard blows to the head. BEEF and Reeshi then begin exchange kicks before Reeshi finally takes control. Reeshi gets BEEF into the ropes and starts delivering upper cuts, causing BEEF to put more weight into the top rope. Reeshi goes to clothesline BEEF over but Venom jumps onto Reeshi’s back and starts hammering away on the back of his head. Reeshi elbows Venom off and turns his attention to Venom. BEEF continues to rest against the ropes as Reeshi misses a clothesline over Venom’s ducking head and they switch spots, with Venom now between BEEF and Reeshi. Venom stops himself from knocking into BEEF, turns back to Reeshi and then ducks a big boot. However, Reeshi’s big boot connects with BEEF’s head and it sends BEEF over the top rope and to elimination.
Mongo: ONE MORE TO GO! WHO SHALL IT BE???
Venom superkicks Reeshi against the ropes, but doesn’t knock him over. Venom takes a couple quick steps away from Reeshi, turns back around and runs at him and goes for a clothesline over for the elimination. Reeshi catches Venom by the throat, however, and throws Venom in the air away from him. Venom lands on his back square in the middle of the ring. He slowly picks himself off of the mat before Reeshi marches over and grabs him by the hair, lifting him up to his feet. Reeshi lifts Venom up for a powerbomb, but instead of going for the middle of the ring, he carries Venom on his shoulders to the ropes. Reeshi attempts a powerbomb, but Venom tightens his legs around Reeshi’s neck, hangs down and grabs the ropes, and pulls Reeshi over the ropes with him. Reeshi crashes to the floor as Venom hangs on, keeping himself from being eliminated. Reeshi is quickly carried off by a group of Lowes employees
Mongo: WE HAVE A WINNER!
Venom is quickly taken as well from a group of Lowes employees. They all pat him on the back and congratulate him. Venom’s exhaustion turns to excitement as the group continues to congratulate him. They begin to usher him away from the ring, and someone in the group places a crown made of flowers on Venom’s head. Another then straps a wrestling championship belt, also made of flowers, around Venom’s waist. Venom’s arms keep getting raises by several in the group as they continue to usher him before they all walk away silently. Venom suddenly finds himself standing alone, adorned in flowers. Mongo approaches him as behind Mongo, Reeshi and BEEF can be seen being carried to the inside of the Lowes.
Venom: What… What did I win?
Mongo: VENOM! YOU ARE NOW…. THE XHF NETWORK… MAY... KING!
The group erupts around Venom, applauding for a brief 4 seconds before all stopping. Venom can sense something is wrong as more flowers are draped around him, suddenly realizing he’s covered head to toe in flowers and can barely move. He locks eyes with Mongo, who just grins at him.
Mongo: It’ll be ok, Venom. You did good.
Venom notices movement to his left, a wheelchair is being pushed by him, with a large bear seemingly sitting there. The wheelchair is being pushed into the Lowes as well with the losers of the Rumble match. Mongo places an overly large hand onto Venom’s shoulder.
Mongo: To ten more years of high ratings, monetary value, and tremendous power over men’s lives. Thank you.
Venom: What are you going on about?
Mongo nods to Venom, and then nods to someone in the group surrounding them. Two men emerge from the group with lit torches, who then march past Venom & Mongo and head towards the Lowes.
Venom: Mongo… What are you doing?
Mongo: Anything I want. Watch.
Mongo moves out of the way for Venom to catch the rest of the events, including the bear in the wheelchair sitting in the middle of the Lowes entrance. Lumber, hay bails, and various XHF wrestlers from over the years sit motionless in the entranceway. But Venom notices something weird about the bear in the middle…
Venom: Goldbear? ...Ja… James?
Not only is it Goldbear in the wheelchair, it’s Goldbear’s bear skin and fur draped around James Mueller, covering most of James body except for his face and hands. James’ eyes move around a bunch but he seems to be paralyzed… The two with the torches walk behind James and start lighting the hay bails on fire, which starts to grow slowly through the Lowes. Venom can’t seem to move and can only watch as the fire engulfs most of the Lowes entrance way. Venom becomes distraught as some of the wrestlers inside of the Lowes begin to yell in agony from being burned alive. The Lowes employees begin to groan and moan dramatically as well, mocking the wrestlers suffering in pain.
Mongo: You’ve done good, Venom. You’ve done good.
Venom becomes distraught… He begins to shout, and he even begins to cry a little… But then his sadness turns to grief… and then turns to contentment… and he smiles. Venom begins to laugh.
And we fade out.
???: Marcus! MARCUS!
The yelling of a woman wakes everyone from their trips. Venom, Mueller and Velez all eyeball each other for a second, before a woman opens up the tent and turns his attention to the Indian in the tent.
???: Marcus! Your pizza is here.
Marcus: Oh shit, boys, perfect timing. Come get some pepperoni and mushrooms.
Marcus and his presumed wife both exit the tent and leave towards the back deck and screen door of a suburban ranch-style home. Inside the tent, the three GUNS don’t move… Until Velez reaches into his jacket pocket and pulls out a white paper manual and begins to study it intently.
Mueller: Charlie… What are you reading?
Velez: It’s the manual to my iPhone…
Venom and Mueller both look at him confused but then look at each other with concern.