2006 Frank Marano Jr. Memorial Cup
Dec 3, 2023 15:43:38 GMT -5
Mongo the Destroyer and mosler like this
Post by Jonnie Valentine on Dec 3, 2023 15:43:38 GMT -5
"Phreaked" by Delta 9 plays and a video montage plays of Hardkore World's 19 year history. Cyrus Williams hits Andrew Karnage with The Blackout...Tarrasque chokeslams Big Brute ACE off of a balcony to the floor below...Rad Rick pulls back on a scorpion deathlock on Dragon Kimura...Ace Kilcannon drops "Tigerheart" Rally Jackson on the back of his head with The Kill...Bronco Guerillo comes off on with a rana off the second turnbuckle on Rad Rick...Adrian Faust nails Death Gojira with a Helldriver...Fidel "Che" Gueverra throws powder in Bronco Guerillo's eyes...Rated X hits Ghandi the Butcher with The Unabomber...Kentaro Korose hits Kuala Hala with a facebreaker deathkick...Matthew X flaming thumper heart punches Quasimoto Jones..."Deathstryke" Cyan Komar hits San Diego Strangler with The Deathstryke...Sadiopath pins "Nightmare" Stormy Sommers with a sadioplex...Devon Stevens hits Bobby Nowa with a Zero Grav Leg Drop...Rally Jackson puts Adrian Faust through a press table with a cradle piledriver...Tosh Marley tiger drivers Matthew X...Ace Kilcannon comes off the rope with a springboard DDT on El Hombre Murcie'Lago...Reverand Gozo Shioda nails Ace Kilcannon with a crucifix ganso bomb...Tuxedo Mask executes a gorgeous corkscrew 450 splash on "Sweet" Richard Romero..."Sexy" Anjanette Turner bending Makoto Jupiter in half with a scorpion deathlock with a crossface...Kilroy Evans drops from off the top of a cage with a crowbar across the chest of Death Gojira on a burning car...Tamara Sanchez delivering a crisp helicopter rana on Xyrynth onto a chair...The Miracle Violence Combination II giving Tarrasque a Shotgun Suplex...Cobryn gives Robert Hunglestien III The Answer 2005...Lonewolf McNeely gets a running start and jumps into the Scent of Destruction diamond cutter but Big Bad Bill reverses it into a reverse DDT faceplant off the second rope...Lucifer Jones gives Devon Stevens a London Air Raid off the top rope through a table on the floor...Ayame "Phoenix" Tokugawa backflips off the cage, catching Brandi on the top turnbuckle on the way down with a inverted FireBird DDT...Death Gojira puts the ladder over Cobryn's head in the corner with his chest in the turnbuckle, then jumps off the top turnbuckle on the long end, see sawing him into the audience....Kilroy Evans grabs Adrian Tanner Jr. on the apron and hits The Bad Touch to the floor...Vampira comes off the top rope with a shooting star press on Vagabond through a table on the floor...Andrew Sinclair gives Andrew Karnage an exploder off the ring steps on to the concrete floor...Lucifer Jones gives Kilroy Evans a burning hammer off the apron through a burning table with thumbtacks...Tatsuya Arakawa DDTs Sun off the apron to the concrete floor...Legacy pulls "Platinum" Pat Bozzini into a set-up for a piledriver, but Bozzini blocks it and reverses it into an alabama slammer but on the way over, Bozzini turns it into a tigerbomb... Lonewolf McNeely presses David Sadler over his head and drops him in the No Human Contact diamond cutter then it fades into a graphic that reads "Frank A. Marano Jr. Memorial Cup". The camera pans around Hardkore Hall showing the fans holding up various signs. The shot pans out to Guillermo O'Bannon with an blow dried Phil Blauer sitting in the next chair
Guillermo O'Bannon: Hello fans, both Hardkore and otherwise, and thank you for joining us for the third annual Frank A. Marano Memorial Cup. 24 of the World's top tag teams have converged for tonight's tournament. The 8 top seeded teams will recieve a first round bye, while the other 16 teams will battle it out to see who will face the winner of that bracket. Next to me is my mandatory partner, Phil Blauer.
Phil Blauer: I would like to welcome all the new fans who may not know me. I'm Phil Blauer, former TV anchor and four time Desert News Hawk award winner. I'm the peanut butter in this Reese Cup.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Does that make me the chocolate?
Phil Blauer: That makes you the 79 cents it cost.
“Some Might Say" by Oasis plays and the Palm Springs fans cheer. Syberus walks down to the ring followed by "The Mummy Commando" Genity Howard
Guillermo O'Bannon: Syberus making his return to the ring after suffering broken ribs at the hands of Soutter during his impromptu Hardkore West Coast title match at a Hardkore Rocky Mountains house show in Logan City, Utah. Genity Howard on quite a roll in SWAT Australia, winning their top singles title and being voted 2005's Wrestler of the Year.
Yolanda Ando: Genity Howard wears some loose clothing, cargo pants, a brandless, generic pair of white athletic shoes and an unbuttoned short-sleeve button up shirt with a depiction of Mega Man 3 on the back. He wears a metal face-mask akin to Vega from SF2. He has the SWAT Australia Championship belt strapped around his waist. Under the torso wrappings, you can faintly see a tattoo of the Venom Insignia. Syberus wears dark blue vinyl-look short tights with the yellow circle of stars representing the European Union on the front and back, black elbow and knee pads and black boots, with yellow hand/wrist tape to accent the yellow of the European stars.
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "Ladies and Gentleman, welcome to Palm Springs Convention Center. Hardkore Jonnie Valentine and Hardkore World presents the Frank A. Marano Jr. Memorial Cup! This first tag team match is scheduled for one fall and a 30 minute time limit. Your referee is Ron Reid. Featuring first, Representing SWAT Australia; from Parts Unknown; Standing 6 feet 3 inches tall; Weighing 195 pounds; He is The Current SWAT Australian Heavyweight Champion ...'THE MUMMY COMMANDO' GENITY HOWARD!!! His partner represents Hardkore America; from The Continent of Europe; Standing 6 feet tall; Weighing 228 pounds...SYBERUS!!!"
The Palm Springs fans chant "Wel-come Back! Wel-come Back! Wel-come Back! Wel-come Back! Wel-come Back!" Then "Caught in a Mosh" by Anthrax plays. Mr. 100 walks out and hands fans fake $100 bills with his picture on it. Blak Lung walks out next, sneering and the booing fans
Guillermo O'Bannon: Blak Lung also makes his return to the ring after quite a layoff. He interfered in the tag team title match between K.G.B. and L.S.D., stabbing Jones in the forehead with a rusty coat hanger. Mr. 100 also tried to make a 100 run-ins during that match, only one actually worked though.
Phil Blauer: Can't win for losing.
Guillermo O'Bannon: What the hell does that mean?
Phil Blauer: I have no idea. But maybe our fashion reporter Yolanda Ando knows!
Yolanda Ando: I don't know either, Phil. But Blak Lung wears army surplus jungle boots, green BDU pants, and a white tank top undershirt. His receeding hair line is covered by scar tissue. His black, nappy hair is long and unkept. He also has a patchy beard. Mr. 100 wears a bright neon green bodysuit with a mask covered in question marks.
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "Their opponents, Representing Hardkore America; featuring first from The Hundred Acre Wood; Standing 6 feet 4 inches tall; Weighing 240 pounds...MR. 100!!! His partner is from Accra in The Republic of Ghana; Standing 5 feet 11 inches tall; Weighing 245 pounds...BLAK LUNG!!!"
The crowd boos and jeers them. Ron Reid signals for the bell. Syberus and Blak Lung start out. Syberus rams his knee in Lung's stomach
Guillermo O'Bannon: Syberus whips Lung around with a corkscrew neckbreaker! He pulls Lung up by the fro, and irish whips Lung into the ropes. Syberus backdrops Blak Lung nearly into the ropes.
Blak Lung clutches the small of his back and scoots along the canvas. Syberus goes to pull him up by the front, but Blak Lung inside cradles him
Referee Ron Reid: 1...(Syberus kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Blak Lung scoops Syberus up but he falls behind him on his feet in an inverted facelock. Reverse DDT!
The audience applauds and Syberus tags in Genity Howard. They give Blak Lung a double dropkick; Genity going high & Syberus going low
Guillermo O'Bannon: "The Mummy Commando" Genity Howard full nelsons Blak Lung and drops back into a dragon suplex!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Blak Lung gets his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Genity Howard pulls Blak Lung up into a suplex and then drills him headfirst into a falcon arrow!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Blak Lung rolls his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Howard pulls Lung up but Blak Lung drives his knee up into Howard's stomach. Blak Lung drills Howard's head into the mat with a DDT!
Blak Lung front facelocks Genity Howard and runs up the turnbuckles into a tornado DDT, but Howard pushes him off to the mat! The fans pop
Guillermo O'Bannon: Genity Howard gets a running start and then cartwheels into a back elbow!
Phil Blauer: That mummy can move, baby!
Guillermo O'Bannon: The Mummy Commando lifts Blak Lung up into a hanging suplex and then drops him headfirst in a brainbuster!
The crowd cheers and Genity Howard tags in Syberus. They double suplex Blak Lung
Guillermo O'Bannon: Syberus double underhooks Blak Lung's arms, and flips him up and drops him in a tiger driver '91!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Blak Lung claps his legs together on Syberus' head)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Syberus irish whips Blak Lung into the ropes, and catches him with a perfectly executed dropkick!
Syberus bounces into the ropes but Mr. 100 sticks his knee out into Syberus' kidneys! Blak Lung sneaks up on him with an inverted facelock, and drops down into a reverse DDT onto his knee
Guillermo O'Bannon: Blak Lung brings his elbow down on Syberus' throat. He pumphandles Syberus up onto his shoulder and drops down into a tombstone!!
Blak Lung tags in Mr. 100. Blak Lung irish whips Syberus into the ropes, and Mr. 100 nearly takes his head off with a clothesline. The Palm Springs fans boo
Guillermo O'Bannon: Mr. 100 shoots him into the ropes and tiltawhirls him, but Syberus reverses with a crucifix cradle!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...(Mr. 100 gets his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Syberus irish whips Mr. 100 into the ropes and powerslams him!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...(Mr. 100 kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Syberus waits for Mr. 100 to get up, and then hits him with a spear! Syberus flips him over into a northern lights suplex!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Mr. 100 gets his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Syberus tags in Genity Howard. Howard irish whips Mr. 100 into the ropes, Syberus clotheslines him while Genity sweeps his legs out from under him!!
"The Mummy Commando" Genity Howard climbs to the top turnbuckle from inside the ring. He backflips into a moonsault splash
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Mr. 100 kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Genity Howard steps out on to the apron, and slingshots himself onto the middle of the top rope. He spins off with a springboard roundhouse kick!
That pops the jaded Palm Springs audience! Genity Howard irish whips Mr. 100 into the ropes, but the masked man comes back with a high cross body
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Genity Howard rolls it over into a pinning position)
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Mr. 100 kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Genity Howard rolls into a koppo kick! Genity Howard steps back out on the apron and comes off the middle of the top with a springboard diving DDT!!
The Palm Springs Convention Center roars. Genity Howard tags in Syberus. Howard fireman's carries Mr. 100 on his shoulders and walks him over to the corner. He sits Mr. 100 on the top turnbuckle, while Syberus climbs up to the second rope. Genity Howard joins his partner on the second turnbuckle and they double super fisherman's buster Mr. 100
Guillermo O'Bannon: "The OBLITERATIONATOR~!!! Version 2.0 Turbo with Lime... or else!"
Phil Blauer: What in the hell are you talking about?
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...3!!!
The fans cheer as "Game Over" from Mega Man 3 plays. Ron Reid raises Syberus & Genity Howard's arm
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "At 9 minutes 25 seconds; THE WINNERS OF THE MATCH, ADVANCING TO THE SECOND ROUND, 'THE MUMMY COMMANDO' GENITY HOWARD & SYBERUS!!!"
Guillermo O'Bannon: Syberus & Genity Howard score the first win in tonight's tournament! They go on to the second round to face the winner of Kilroy Evans & Sun vs. Sly Fondell & Dracon Xanathos!
Editor's Note: In Hardkore World and during this tournament, the way it works is I will post one match a day and people will continue to RP throughout the show. Your RPs will count towards your match, and if your match has already past, it will count towards the next round. Please post your RPs as parts of the continuing show.
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Feb 27, 2006#2
Guillermo O'Bannon: Next up is a match between two first time teams. Sly Fondell teams up with SWAT Australia President Dracon Xanathos to take on Hardkore America Heavyweight Champion Kilroy Evans & Sun. The winner will take on Syberus & SWAT Australian Heavyweight Champion "The Mummy Commando" Genity Howard
Phil Blauer: Sly Fondell's name sounds like a cartoon character. He's a cat that loves the ladies. Cedric the Entertainer would do the voice. Oooh, better yet, somebody doing Cedric would do the voice.
former prowrestling.com internet reporter Matt Boone: Malcolm Jamal Warner's available.
“Princes of the Universe” by Queen hits. Four beautiful women (a brunette, an ebony, a red head and a Latina) come out, all dressed in designer Armani dresses. The first two are carrying golden bowls full of rose petals that they scatter down the ramp. The other two are also holding golden bowls, only these contain pin badges with Sly and Dracon on them that say “XXX”. They throw these badges to the crowd; especially the pretty ladies! As the girls reach the ring Dracon and Sly, accompanied by Ayame and Jada (who both look even more beautiful than the girls at ringside) walk through the curtain. Pyro's of red and gold blast impressively from the sides of the rampway as red and gold lights shine on the gorgeous foursome. Sly struts arrogantly down the ramp opening his golden robe and flashing his chiseled body to the crowd while Dracon stretches his neck moving his head to the sides and cockily smiles for the cute female fans (no smile or attention for the ugly ones!). The Brunette and the Redhead have scattered more petals inside the ring and open the ropes to help Dracon and Sly in. Jada takes off Sly's robe and caresses his body as Sly grins his trademark arrogant smirk and poses with a double bicep flex, while Dracon pulls Ayame close to him and slowly seductively wet kisses her
Guillermo O'Bannon: That kiss sure is seductive.
Phil Blauer: And wet! Just like me.
Guillermo O'Bannon: These two are season veterans in the Land Down Under. Fondell is a former SWAT Australia Champion, defeating Adrian Tanner Jr. for the belt after a year long feud. They just had a brutal barbed wire fire cage match at New Year's Nightmare that Tanner won. Xanathos has some history in our fair state, as a former Golden State Champion with Rockin Rick Owens' SCW, as well as a former MCW United States Champion.
Phil Blauer: I never noticed this before, but we get a lot of people from SWAT for these tourn-a-thingies. I wonder why that is.
Yolanda Ando: Sly Fondell wears a custom made Armani blue pastel coloured trunks with 'Fondell ' written on the butt in fancy gold writing, blue pastel boots with "SF" on the side in gold, pastel blue kneepads and golden taped wrists. Sly wears a custom Armani made golden robe to the ring, on the back of the robe written in real gold flake is 'The Model of male perfection'.
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "The following tag team match is scheduled for one fall and a 30 minute time limit. Your referee is Mike Peters. Featuring first, representing SWAT Australia. From Atlantic City, New Jersey; Standing 6 feet 5 inches tall; Weighing 298 pounds...SLY FONDELL!!! From Parts Unknown; Standing 6 feet 4 inches tall; Weighing 250 pounds...KJ 'DRACON' XANATHOS!!!"
The Palm Springs fans boo. "Frontier Psychiatrist" by The Avalanches
plays and Hardkore Hall erupts. Kilroy Evans and Sun walk out and are nearly blown back by the applause
Guillermo O'Bannon: Alot of fans were disappointed that Kilroy Evans didn't team up with his usual partner, Andrew Karnage. Kilroy Evans and Sun want to make everyone here in Palm Springs forget about The Miracle Violence Combination II, at least for just one night.
Phil Blauer: Who?
Yolanda Ando: Wouldn't these guys be known as MVC III? Kilroy Evans wears a black NESkimoes t-shirt, blue jeans, sneakers, and red, white, & blue wristbands. Sun wears a bright yellow martial arts gi and a “vega” style mask. The mask is white with a red dot in the center mimicking the Japanese Flag. He wears two Shuko Ninja Claws on each hands and carries a bag of Martial Arts weapons.
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "Their opponents represent Hardkore America; Featuring first from Attbury, South Carolina; Standing 5 feet 11 inches tall; Weighing 250 pounds; He is One Third HARDKORE WORLD SIX MAN TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS & The Current HARDKORE AMERICA HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION...KILROY EVANS!!!"
The crowd erupts with cheers. Kilroy Evans stands on the second turnbuckle waving at the fans. Mike Peters signals for the bell. Sun and Sly Fondell start out
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sun & Fondell lock up, and Fondell takes him over with a fireman's carry. Fondell irish whips him into the ropes, but Sun comes back with a flying head scissors!
Hardkore Hall cheers. Sun applies an armbar. He sticks his knee into the ball of Fondell's shoulder. He then wraps his legs around Fondell's arm with a leg scissors
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sun rows back with Fondell's arm. Sun pulls him up for an abdominal stretch, but before he can cinch it in, Fondell hiptosses him. Fondell picks him up into a waistlock, but Sun back elbows him. He does a go behind and applies a chicken wing to that same arm.
Sun tags in Kilroy Evans. Kilroy Evans takes Fondell's leg out with a legsweep while Sun comes off the ropes with a spinning heel kick to Sly's face
Guillermo O'Bannon: High and Lois!! Looks like somebody came up with that name on the shitter. I'm going with Emily, then she shouted it to Kilroy on the other side of the trailer.
Phil Blauer: A move named after a comic nobody reads. Was "Mary Worth" taken?
Referee Mike Peters: 1...(Sly Fondell kicks out)
former prowrestling.com reporter Matt Boone: Sources close to the situation say they're making a Hi and Lois movie. Steve Martin plays Hi, Bonnie Hunt plays Lois, John Goodman plays the fat neighbor, and the kids are computer generated. The director feels their "cuteness" is key to the film's sucess.
Phil Blauer: Kilroy should play Hagar the Horrible.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Kilroy Evans twists Sly around in a swinging neckbreaker! He pulls Fondell up by the hair and irish whips him into the turnbuckles. He follows him in with a hard avalanche!
Phil Blauer: I think the ring just moved an inch! No, that's just me.
Yolanda Ando: Gross.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Kilroy Evans scoops Fondell up, but Fondell lands on his feet behind him in an inverted facelock. Fondell drives him into the mat with a reverse DDT!
The Palm Springs fans boo. Sly Fondell snap suplexes Kilroy Evans. He backs Evans into the corner with a series of sharp knife edge chops and then tags in Dracon Xanathos
Guillermo O'Bannon: Fondell irish whips Kilroy Evans into the ropes and takes him down with a drop toe hold while Xanathos dropkicks him in the face! Dracon Xanathos pulls Kilroy up by the arm, and twists it.
Dracon Xanathos drags Kilroy into the center of the ring by his twisted arm, and then back hook kicks him! He pulls Kilroy up into a front facelock
Guillermo O'Bannon: Kilroy Evans reverses with a spinebuster! He pulls Dracon Xanathos up and then drills his head into the mat with a DDT!
Kilroy Evans runs into the ropes and baseball slide kicks Xanathos in the side of the head! Hardkore Hall roars, and Kilroy Evans traps one of Xanathos' arms. But Dracon hiptosses him over
Guillermo O'Bannon: Dracon Xanathos runs at Kilroy and takes him down with a crucifix cradle!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...(Kilroy Evans gets his arm loose)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Xanathos tags Sly Fondell in, and then climbs to the top turnbuckle. Sly Fondell lifts Kilroy Evans up on his shoulders in a human torture rack. Dracon Xanathos comes off the top with a leg drop to Kilroy Evans' neck!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Kilroy Evans kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sly Fondell hammerlocks Evans' arm behind him and then drops him in a belly to belly suplex on his chicken winged arm!
Phil Blauer: This guy's a powerhouse!
Palm Springs fans boo. Sly Fondell applies a chicken wing crossface. He clamps down on Kilroy's windpipe, while wrenching up on his bent elbow. Mike Peters asks Evans if he wants to submit but The Attbury Assassin refuses
Guillermo O'Bannon: Kilroy fights his way up to his feet, but Fondell continues to pull up on his arm. Evans mule kicks him in the groin! He drives Fondell's face into the mat with an inverted russian leg sweep!
Hardkore Hall comes to life! Kilroy Evans full nelsons Sly Fondell, and dragon suplexes him
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Sly Fondell gets his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Kilroy Evans atomic drops Fondell on the top turnbuckle facing the audience. He pulls Fondell down into a tree of woe and then backs into the other corner. Kilroy Evans spears an upside down Sly!
The fans cheer and Kilroy Evans tags Sun back into the ring. Sun climbs to the top turnbuckle while Kilroy pulls Sly's head into his legs. Kilroy Evans picks Fondell up in a powerbomb while Sun comes down with a leg drop across Fondell's neck
Guillermo O'Bannon: Dain Bramage!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Sly Fondell kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sun irish whips Fondell into the ropes and lifts up into a flapjack! Sun runs into the ropes and comes down across the back of Fondell's head with an axe kick!
The audience cheers. Sun climbs to the top turnbuckle and backflips into a moonsault but Fondell rolls out of the way!! Fondell picks him up into a textbook suplex
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sly Fondell presses Sun over his head and lifts him up & down three times before slamming him hard to the mat! He twists Sun's legs up and turns him over into a texas cloverleaf!
Fondell rocks back on Sun's spine, bending him in half. Sun tries to crawl over to the ropes, but Fondell holds him there. Fondell reaches out and tags in Dracon Xanathos
Guillermo O'Bannon: Dracon Xanathos moves in and applies an armbar while Sun's still locked in Sly Fondell's texas cloverleaf! Mike Peters giving them the five count but these guys aren't breaking.
Kilroy Evans runs in and cracks Fondell in the face with a hard kick to the face to break the cloverleaf! Kilroy drops an elbow on the back of Dracon Xanathos' head to break the armbar
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sun spins around and tags Xanathos in the face with a hard punch. Sly Fondell attempts to interfere, but Sun monkey flips him back into his corner!
The crowd cheers. Sun turns around into an STO from Dracon Xanathos, and the boos return. Xanathos pulls Sun up by the hair, and stands him up with a european forearm
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sun responds with a roundhouse kick! He tags in Kilroy Evans and climbs to the top turnbuckle from inside the ring. Evans shoots Xanathos into the ropes and spinebusters him hard into the mat! Sun backflips into a moonsault splash!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Dracon Xanathos kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Kilroy Evans applies a sleeper on Xanathos on the mat. He's got the forearm underneath Xanathos' chin, wearing the SWAT President down. Xanathos fights his way to his feet and backs Kilroy Evans in the corner. Xanathos stands on the second turnbuckle and inverted facelocks him. He jumps off with a tornado reverse DDT!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Kilroy Evans gets his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Dracon Xanathos goes for a suplex, but Kilroy blocks it. Kilroy reverses with a brainbuster!
Kilroy Evans goes for a piledriver, but Dracon Xanathos backdrops out of it! Xanathos drops Kilroy Evans with a side effect
Guillermo O'Bannon: Dracon Xanathos lifts Kilroy Evans in a release back suplex! He tags in Sly Fondell and sits Kilroy Evans on the top turnbuckle. Sly & Dracon climb to the second turnbuckle and give Evans a double brainbuster superplex!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Kilroy Evans kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sly Fondell scoops Kilroy up into a northern lights bomb!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Sun stomps the back of Fondell's head)
Guillermo O'Bannon: The former SWAT Australia Champion irish whips Kilroy Evans into the ropes and flips him over his head with a belly to belly suplex!
The Palm Springs crowd boos. Fondell double underhooks Kilroy's arms and he back body drops him. He hits a stunner on Fondell and catches his legs on the way up, then turns him over into a boston crab
Guillermo O'Bannon: Kilroy Evans rocks back on Fondell's legs, planting his feet. Fondell crawls over to the ropes and reaches out, but Kilroy drags him back into the center of the ring and reapplies the boston crab! Fondell refusing to submit, so Kilroy Evans pulls him up into a double underhook, then drills his head into the canvas with a DDT!!
Kilroy Evans tags in Sun, and lifts Sly Fondell up in an electric chair while Sun climbs to the top turnbuckle. Sun takes Fondell off Kilroy's shoulders with a spear
Guillermo O'Bannon: The Fear Of God, Part Deaux!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Sly Fondell kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sun bounces into the ropes and drops a leg across Sly Fondell's face. He climbs to the top turnbuckle and backflips into a shooting star press!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Sly Fondell kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sun handsprings into a bodypress but the big man catches him and powerslams him! Sly Fondell pulls Sun's head into his legs and pulls him up into The Fondell Bomb!!
The crowd jeers and boos Sly Fondell. He front facelocks Sun and cradles his leg. He drives his head into the mat with a cradle dangerous DDT
Guillermo O'Bannon: The Last Kiss Goodnite!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...thr- (Kilroy Evans stomps Fondell's head)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Mike Peters shoos Kilroy Evans back to his corner while Fondell butterflies Sun's arms. He lifts him up into a spinning tigerdriver he calls The Prom Night Promise!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...thr- (Sun claps his legs together on Fondell's head)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Fondell tags in Dracon Xanathos. Xanathos climbs up to the top turnbuckle. Fondell back suplexes Sun and Xanathos backflips into a moonsault!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Sun kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Dracon Xanathos climbs to the top again and comes off the top with a clothesline!! Xanathos irish whips Sun into the ropes, but Sun comes back with a flying headscissors takedown!
The crowd comes to life! Sun climbs to the top turnbuckle and rolls over Xanathos with a sunset flip
Guillermo O'Bannon: Setting Sun!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...thr- (Sly Fondell stomps the back of Sun's head)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sun gets up to deal with Fondell but Dracon Xanathos sneaks up on him with a russian legsweep!
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "Twenty Minutes Have Elapsed. 10 Minutes Remaining."
Guillermo O'Bannon: Dracon Xanathos lifts Sun up into a fireman's carry and then spins him around into a TKO! Samurai Cutter!!
The fans boo and Dracon Xanathos tags in Sly Fondell. Dracon Xanathos inverted facelocks Sun and spins him around into a test drive! Sly Fondell applies a cobra clutch bodyvice
Guillermo O'Bannon: The Check Mate into The Dream Lover. Kilroy Evans enters the ring and stomps Sly Fondell, breaking up The Dream Lover. Sly Fondell gets to his feet and catches The Bad Touch diamond cutter by Kilroy Evans!!
Sun pulls Sly Fondell up into a crucifix powerbomb then drops him on the back of his head!! Sun cradles his legs for the pin; Dracon Xanathos steps into the ring but Kilroy Evans spears him
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...3!!!
The bell rings and the Palm Springs cheer. "Frontier Psychiatrist" by The Avalanches hits. Dracon Xanathos slaps Fondell on the back and he releases The Dream Lover
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "At 21 minutes 24 seconds; THE WINNERS OF THE MATCH, ADVANCING TO THE SECOND ROUND...KILROY EVANS & SUN!!!"
Guillermo O'Bannon: Kilroy Evans & Sun advance to the second round to face Syberus & SWAT Australian Champion "The Mummy Commando" Genity Howard!
"Magnificent" Ron Lauren & "Heart Throb" Rich Andrews walk down to the ring with no music. Hardkore World Women's Champion "Sexy" Anjanette Turner walking behind them
Guillermo O'Bannon: Welcome back fans, up next is our match between four battle tested veterans. Ron Lauren & Rich Andrews are former Hardkore America Tag Team Champions, returning to the ring for this tournament after over a five year layoff. They are one of the few wrestlers in this tournament that were the last Frank A. Marano Cup.
Phil Blauer: No music, eh. Kinda pretencious, wouldn't you say? I bet they have heat with the boys in the back. Boone?
former prowrestling.com internet reporter Matt Boone: On it.
Yolanda Ando: "Magnificent" Ron Lauren wears black trunks with matching boots and wrist bands. "Heart Throb" Rich Andrews wears a red trunks with the words “Heart Throb” written on the back of them. Also has matching red boots.
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "The following first round tag team match is scheduled for one fall. Your referee is Ron Reid. Featuring first, accompanied to the ring by 'Sexy' Anjanette Turner; First, from New York City; Standing 6 feet 1 inch tall; Weighing 285 pounds...'MAGNIFICENT' RON LAUREN!! His partner is from Phoenix, Arizona; Standing 5 feet 8 inches tall; Weighing 230 pounds...'HEART THROB' RICH ANDREWS!!"
The Palm Springs fans cheer the familiar team. "No Quarter" by Led Zeppelin plays and the crowd quickly turns ugly. Johnny Lee Harley steps out first with a branding iron, swinging a lariot over his head. Out walks Cobryn next and is nearly blown back by the jeers
Guillermo O'Bannon: Cobryn making his return after taking some time off after losing his Hardkore World Heavyweight Championship to Andrew Sinclair in Sacramento. He's reportedly been suffering from a deep depression, only surfacing to work pre-arranged dates over in Australia for SWAT.
Phil Blauer: Yeah, look at the sadness in his eyes. It's Billy Jack Haynes-esque.
Guillermo O'Bannon: No it isn't...my god, your right. That man carried such a burden.
Phil Blauer: Just put a silly hat on him and put Florida on his trunks, and it's him. Doesn't seem like a Cobryn type return. Where's his Lucifer Jones' mask?
Guillermo O'Bannon: These guys have teamed before, as former Hardkore World Six Man Tag Team Champions, as well as their recent match in Joetsu, Japan against The New Original Axis of Evil for the Hardkore Nippon Tag Team Championship!
Yolanda Ando: Johnny Lee Harley wears green trunks and a large brown cowboy hat with the Hardkore Nippon Grand Championship around his waist. Cobryn is dressed in a black silk robe that trails behind him a good four feet. He wears regular black tights and has tanned skin. He also wears black wrestling boots.
former prowrestling.com internet reporter Matt Boone: These guys recently lost the Hardkore Nippon Tag Team Titles to The New Original Axis of Evil.
Phil Blauer: What fed?
former prowrestling.com internet reporter Matt Boone: JoJo Sushi presents: Hardkore Nippon. It's located just south of this message board if anybody's interested.
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "Their opponents, representing Hardkore Nippon; Featuring first, from Sweetwater, Texas; Standing 6 feet 3 inches tall; Weighing 312 pounds; He is The Current HARDKORE NIPPON GRAND CHAMPION...JOHNNY LEE HARLEY!! His partner is from Key Largo of the Florida Keys; Standing 6 feet 4 inches tall; Weighing 250 pounds...COBRYN!!!"
The Palm Springs Convention Center boos. Rich Andrews and Johnny Lee Harley start off. Harley lands a hard kick to Andrews' gut
Guillermo O'Bannon: Harley lands a stiff punch to Andrews' chin. He shoots Rich Andrews into the ropes, but The Heart Throb slides underneath a big boot. He comes up behind Harley and chicken wing crossface suplexes him!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...(Johnny Lee Harley rolls his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Rich Andrews belly to belly suplexes Harley over his shoulder and then catches him with a rude awakening on the way down!
Rich Andrews applies an inverted facelock and climbs to the second turnbuckle. But Johnny Lee Harley flips him forward into a powerslam
Guillermo O'Bannon: Johnny Lee Harley applies a bearhug. He squeezes Rich Andrews' lower back, then runs him into the corner. He doesn't give Andrews a clean break and instead goes to work with punches to his stomach. He tags in Cobryn.
Cobryn bashes Andrews in the corner with a pointed elbow smashes. Rich Andrews ducks one and responds with a tiger suplex
Referee Ron Reid: 1...(Cobryn gets his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: "The Heart Throb" Rich Andrews wrenches Cobryn's neck with a swinging neckbreaker.
The audience applauds. Andrews tries to turn Cobryn over in a boston crab, but Cobryn rakes Rich's eyes. Cobryn crawls over and tags Johnny Lee Harley back in
Guillermo O'Bannon: Johnny Lee Harley lifts Rich Andrews up into a hanging brainbuster!!
Phil Blauer: Let him think about it a little while there.
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Rich Andrews kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Johnny Lee Harley hiptosses Rich Andrews over into a powerslam!
Harley double underhooks Andrew but the Heart Throb backdrops him. Andrews turns him over into a single leg boston crab. He pulls back on Harley's leg as Ron Reid checks in to see if he taps out
Guillermo O'Bannon: Rich Andrews stands on the back of Johnny Lee Harley's head while applying that single leg boston crab. He turns it into an inverted indian deathlock. Andrews drops back on Harley's twisted legs.
Harley growls in pain, tosses the back of his head into the mat. Andrews gets back to his feet and drops back again on his legs. Harley reaches out and grabs the ropes
Guillermo O'Bannon: Rich Andrews waistlocks Johnny Lee Harley and spins him around & round, into a german suplex! He pulls him up into a second german suplex!
Rich Andrews tags in "Magnificent" Ron Lauren. They both climb to the top turnbuckle then fly off with a double fistdrop
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Johnny Lee Harley kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: The powerman of the group, Ron Lauren vertical suplexes Harley up into a falcon arrow!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Johnny Lee Harley gets his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Ron Lauren goes for a fameasser, but Johnny Lee Harley reverses it into a powerbomb!!
The Palm Springs Convention Center boos. Johnny Lee Harley shows off his power with a one armed bodyslam. He shoots Lauren into the ropes
Guillermo O'Bannon: Johnny Lee Harley flying back elbows Lauren! He pulls Lauren up in a half nelson, but Ron back elbows him in the side of the head. Lauren double underhooks Harley's arms and runs into the center of the ring with a michinoku driver I!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Cobryn stomps Lauren's back)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Ron Lauren tags in Rich Andrews. Ron Lauren bearhugs Johnny Lee Harley and pulls him down across his thighs. Rich Andrews comes off the top rope with a leg drop!!
Phil Blauer: Vegamatic...and/or Death Sentence...and whatever The Dicks call that move!
former prowrestling.com internet reporter Matt Boone: The Tug Job, HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Johnny Lee Harley kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: "Heart Throb" Rich Andrews scoops Harley up and then drops him down in a fisherman's suplex!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Johnny Lee Harley gets his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Rich Andrews climbs to the top turnbuckle, and then catches Johnny Lee Harley with a huracanrana!! He cradles the leg!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Johnny Lee Harley kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Andrews runs into the ropes but Johnny Lee Harley catches him with a tiltawhirl piledriver!!
Hardkore Hall boos Harley as he catches his breath. He flips Rich Andrews over his shoulder and then back again with a dominator!! The boos get louder as Harley rolls Andrews over and pins him
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Rich Andrews kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Johnny Lee Harley drives Rich Andrews' head into the mat with a double underhook DDT!! He tags in Cobryn. Cobryn lifts Andrews over his shoulder into a gory special, then drops to his knees in a facefirst slam!!
The Palm Springs fans boo and chant "FUCK YOU COBRYN *clap* *clap* *clap-clap-clap* FUCK YOU COBRYN *clap* *clap* *clap-clap-clap* FUCK YOU COBRYN *clap* *clap* *clap-clap-clap* FUCK YOU COBRYN *clap* *clap* *clap-clap-clap* FUCK YOU COBRYN *clap* *clap* *clap-clap-clap*" He sneers back at them and kicks the bottom rope at them
Guillermo O'Bannon: Cobryn straightjackets Rich Andrews' arms in front of him then drops back into a rising star suplex!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Rich Andrews gets his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Cobryn runs into the ropes and catches Andrews in the side of the head with a running double kneelift! He lifts Andrews up in an electric chair but Heart Throb spins around on his shoulders into a huracanrana!
The fans come to life. Rich Andrews climbs to the top turnbuckle and spins off into a spiral tap senton!! The Palm Springs crowd erupts
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Rich Andrews kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Andrews inverted facelocks Cobryn, but Cobryn reaches up and scratches his eyes. Cobryn presses Andrews over his head and then drops him into a Fuck You stunner!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...thr- (Rich Andrews kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Cobryn tags Johnny Lee Harley back in. Johnny Lee Harley bites into Rich Andrews' forehead!
Phil Blauer: Not the face!
Guillermo O'Bannon: "Magnificent" Ron Lauren has the same idea and rains down on Harley's head with forearms. Ron Reid shoos him back into the corner, but Rich Andrews takes the advantage to hit Johnny Lee Harley in the chest with his spinning heart punch he calls The Heart Throb!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...thr- (Cobryn stomps the back of Rich Andrews' head)
Guillermo O'Bannon: "Heart Throb" Rich Andrews applies a kataha-jime and spins Johnny Lee Harley around the ring! Harley finds his feet and pushes himself into Andrews in the corner. Johnny Lee Harley drops Andrews on his head with a t-bone suplex!
The fans boo. Johnny Lee Harley lifts Andrews up in a human torture rack but Andrews lands on his feet behind him. He grabs Harley by the head in a 3/4 nelson
Guillermo O'Bannon: Rich Andrews runs up the turnbuckles into an acid drop!! He tags in "Magnificent" Ron Lauren, and they both climb to the top turnbuckle. Rich Andrews and Ron Lauren both leap off with a double dropkick!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...3!!!
The fans cheer wildly, and "Sexy" Anjanette Turner comes into the ring and raises both Lauren & Andrews' arms in victory
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "At 12 minutes 47 seconds; THE WINNERS OF THE MATCH, ADVANCING TO THE SECOND ROUND...'MAGNIFICENT' RON LAUREN & 'THE HEART THROB' RICH ANDREWS!!!"
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sexy Anj is on a roll! She won the Hardkore World Women's Championship and her team advances to the second round. They will face the winner of The Potentials vs. The Devine Comedy.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Coming up next is a match between Stan "The Icon" Wilson's new tag team of P.J. Wright & Casey Sanchez taking on TKOW's Dark Schnitzel and Bob Lancelot. The winner of this match will go on to face "Magnificent" Ron Lauren & "Heart Throb" Rich Andrews in the next round.
(Boone passes Phil a note.)
Phil Blauer: (reading) There's been some great tag team names throughout Hardkore's illustrious history: Rad Thunder, Shadows of the Night, ...Mike Powers and Chang Kahn. But nothing's come close to The Potentials versus The Divine Comedy.
Guillermo O'Bannon: What about Lobster Boy & Professor Mittens?
former prowrestling.com internet reporter Matt Boone: Who was that?
Guillermo O'Bannon: It's my cat & me...I'm so lonely.
As the rythmatic bass of "Gasolina" by Daddy Yankee begins to blare throughout the arena, out walks "The Icon" Stan Wilson wearing his cocky grin from ear to ear, then followed by the "M.C. Phenom" who immediately strikes a stateous pose for the crowd as his brother steps aside. God's Talent" P. J. Wright begins his arrogant strut down to the ring. With his mentor motivating him every step of the way, P. J. slides into the ring and pumps his fist in the air as he poses on the middle rope. As both men make their way down the aisle with Stan leading the way, Casey continues to pose for the crowd before stepping unto the outiside ring apron and climbing the second turnbuckle before once again striking a statuous pose for the crowd, while Stan simaltaneously plays to them and motivates his brother with words of encouragment
Guillermo O'Bannon: Casey Sanchez has wrestled in a Hardkore ring before.
Phil Blauer: You mean the time he got his neck broken by The Miracle Violence Combination II?
Guillermo O'Bannon: Yes, I mean the time he got his neck broken by The Miracle Violence Combination II. This is my first look at PJ Wright.
Phil Blauer: What do you think?
Guillermo O'Bannon: He likes to pump his fist. He's also a former UWA Cruiserweight Champion. But anyone trained by former Hardkore America Heavyweight Champion & SWAT World Heavyweight Champion has about as good a chance to succeed as anyone.
Phil Blauer: Is Casey Sanchez related to Tammy? They're both inexplicably Mexican.
Guillermo O'Bannon: No, but they were married once a few years back. It didn't last long.
Phil Blauer: ...so which one's Mexican, the black guy or the german?
Yolanda Ando: Casey Sanchez wears purple trunks with the word "Phenom" embroidered in black on the backside with gold trim, white wrist tape, black knee pads, and white calf length boots. PJ Wright wears purple trunks with his initials, "P. J." embroidered in black with gold trim on the backside, black arm pads, white hand and wrist tape, black knee pads, and knee length black leather boots.
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "The following first round tag team match is scheduled for one fall with a 30 minute time limit. Your referee is Mike Peters. Featuring first, accompanied to the ring by their manager, Stan "The Icon" Wilson; from Atlanta, Georgia; Standing 5 feet 11 inches tall; Weighing 220 pounds...'GOD'S TALENT' P.J. WRIGHT!! His partner is from Mexico City, Mexico; Standing 6 feet 4 inches tall; Weighing 250 pounds...'THE M.C. PHENOM' CASEY SANCHEZ!! They are THE POTENTIALS!!!"
Phil Blauer: Hmmm...The Potentials. You'd think they could aim higher. I'm not saying call yourself The Fantastics, but hows about The Short-Term Goal Acheivers.
The audience cheers the popular duo. The lights go off at Palm Springs Convention Center and the "All My Life" by Foo Fighters starts. Bob Lancelot and Dark Schnitzel sprint down to the ring to a mixed reaction of cheers & boos from the Palm Springs crowd. Lancelot slides into the ring under the bottom rope and hops up onto the turnbuckle and points at the crowd, he then hops off of the turnbuckle
Guillermo O'Bannon: This is also my first look at The Devine Comedy, but Bob Lancelot is currently undefeated in TKOW.
Phil Blauer: I think that's super. It won't last though, Matt Griffin won't lose forever.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Dark Schnitzel is huge at seven feet tall. I'll bet Casey Sanchez wishes he had his brother Stan Wilson as his partner instead of PJ Wright at least for this match.
Phil Blauer: Get out of his head, O'Bannon!
Yolanda Ando: All of Dark Schnitzel clothes are camoflouge colored. A phantom-like mask that covers upper part of his face, red Hawk-like tattoo covering the left part of face. Open jacket, long gloves, big spear with little spears coming out from the sides tattoo covering the back and the sleeves of his jacket. Big steel chain on his waist, long pants, long boots, same spear tattoo on the sides of his pants. Bob Lancelot has no shirt on with black with orange lightning pants.
Phil Blauer: He has a tattoo on his face? Ladies, he's gotta be single.
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "And their opponents represent TKOW; first hailing from Oxford, England; Standing 5 feet 10 inches tall; Weighing 230 pounds...BOB LANCELOT!!! His partner is from Perplexia; Standing an amazing 7 feet tall; Weighing 320 pounds...DARK SCHNITZEL!!! They are THE DEVINE COMEDY!!!"
The crowd boos Schnitzel & Lancelot as they recieve their final instructions from Mike Peters
Guillermo O'Bannon: Where's Perplexia?
Phil Blauer: Down the interstate from Dyslexia. But keep going and take the exit called Anorexia. The chicks are alot hotter. Dark Schnitzel has a tattoo on his face? Ladies, he's single.
Guillermo O'Bannon: ...Phil, you just said that.
Phil Blauer: ADVANCE PROMPTER PLEASE!
(Boone advances prompter.)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Casey Sanchez and Bob Lancelot start off and Mike Peters signals for the bell. Bob Lancelot locks up with Sanchez and they grapple for position. Casey Sanchez takes him over in a headlock. He presses Lancelot's shoulders to the mat.
Referee Mike Peters: 1...(Bob Lancelot rolls him over into a cradle)
Referee Mike Peters: 1...(Casey Sanchez kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Bob Lancelot flips Sanchez to the mat with a hiptoss, then grabs an armbar. He sticks his knee into the ball of Sanchez's shoulder and wrenches up on his bent elbow.
Mike Peters checks in to see if Sanchez submits but he refuses. Sanchez works his way to his feet, and uses his armbarred arm to irish whip Lancelot into the ropes. He nearly takes Lancelot's head off with a clothesline
Guillermo O'Bannon: Casey Sanchez scoops Bob Lancelot up and slams him hard to the mat. He tags in PJ Wright. Sanchez irish whips Lancelot into the ropes and they give him a double hiptoss!
The audience cheers. Wright pops him in the nose with a shotei palm strike and then gives him another headlock takedown. He grinds his forearm into Bob Lancelot's temple
Guillermo O'Bannon: Lancelot works his way up to his feet and pushes Wright off of him into the ropes. Lancelot takes to the air with a flying lariot!
The Palm Springs crowd boos. Bob Lancelot applies a sleeper. Wright struggles to escape but Lancelot has it in cinched in tight. The audience begins clapping in unison to root Wright on. Lancelot shakes his head and says "He ain't going nowhere."
Guillermo O'Bannon: Wright uses the audience to fight his way back to his feet. Bob Lancelot german suplexes him!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(P.J. Wright rolls his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Bob Lancelot tags in Dark Schnitzel. Lancelot applies a figure four leglock on PJ Wright. Meanwhile, Dark Schnitzel applies a figure four necklock to his head. Happy Hour!!
Phil Blauer: You say frog, I jump. (Phil starts mixing himself a kiwi daqurai)
PJ Wright cries out in pain as Lancelot clamps down on his twisted legs and Dark Schnitzel tries to choke him out. Mike Peters gets to the count of five and forces Lancelot to leave the ring
Guillermo O'Bannon: Dark Schnitzel applies a side headlock.
Phil Blauer: This has to be the most headlocks I've seen in a match since Christian vs...Anybody.
Guillermo O'Bannon: PJ Wright pushes Schnitzel off into the ropes, he hits the giant with a dropkick! While Schnitzel tries to get up, PJ Wright rolls him up with a victory roll!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...(Dark Schnitzel kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: PJ Wright runs into the ropes and tastes Schnitzel's boot upside his head!
Phil Blauer: Nice extension. He must do Dark Yoga.
Yolanda Ando: They teach classes every Wednesday at my gym.
Phil Blauer: You can't call it your gym if you never go.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Dark Schnitzel drops a kneedrop between Wright's eyes and tags in Bob Lancelot. Lancelot climbs to the top turnbuckle, and Dark Schnitzel stands on the second turnbuckle. Schnitzel electric chairs Lancelot up on his shoulders. Dark Schnitzel electric chair drivers Lancelot on top of PJ Wright!! Recalcitrant Actors! Whatever the hell that means.
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(PJ Wright kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Bob Lancelot tags him with a european forearm.
Phil Blauer: And he knows how to do those, being from England. It's the same wisdom that goes behind my San Diego Headbutt.
Blauer pops Guillermo in the eye with his forehead
Guillermo O'Bannon: Ow!
Bob Lancelot irish whips PJ Wright into the ropes and drills his head into the canvas with a huracanrana!! He cradles the leg
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Casey Sanchez kicks Lancelot in the back)
Guillermo O'Bannon: While Mike Peters forces Sanchez back to his corner, Bob Lancelot climbs to the top turnbuckle and comes off with a frog splash to PJ Wright's upraised knees!! Lancelot clutches his stomach, and Wright pops him with a side step shuffle kick!
Hardkore Hall comes alive as PJ Wright tries to crawl over to his corner. Bob Lancelot stops him and pulls him up. Wright ducks underneath a punch and back suplexes him
Guillermo O'Bannon: PJ Wright northern lights suplexes him!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Bob Lancelot gets his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Wright finally tags in Casey Sanchez. Wright fireman's carries Lancelot up on his shoulders and sits him on the top turnbuckle. PJ Wright and Casey Sanchez climbs up to the second turnbuckle, double superplex!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Bob Lancelot kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Casey Sanchez irish whips Bob Lancelot into the ropes and catches him on the way back with a sidewalk backbreaker!
Sanchez goes for a belly to back suplex, but Bob Lancelot catches him with a back elbow. Lancelot DDTs his head into the mat
Guillermo O'Bannon: Lancelot irish whips Sanchez into the ropes and goes for a frankenstiener but Sanchez catches him by the legs and powerbombs him!! Sanchez tosses Lancelot over the top rope to the floor below!
Casey Sanchez half nelsons Lancelot and drops him headfirst on the cement with a t-bone suplex! Sanchez scoops Lancelot up and runs him into the corner post, but Lancelot slips off his shoulder and rams Casey's face into the ringpost
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sanchez busted open over his eye! Bob Lancelot retrieves a fork out of his trunks and stabs it into the laceration over & over!
Phil Blauer: I like this guy!
Guillermo O'Bannon: Lancelot holds Sanchez in a choke hold while driving that metal fork into Sanchez's cut. Bob Lancelot climbs to the top turnbuckle and then leaps off into a plancha!!
A blood drenched Sanchez smacks the guardrail back-first. Bob Lancelot rolls back into the ring and tags in Dark Schnitzel. Casey Sanchez staggers back onto the apron
Phil Blauer: Dark Schnitzel hits Sanchez with a Perplexia Uppercut!
Guillermo O'Bannon: Schnitzel pulls Sanchez back into the ring and pulling piledrivers him!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Casey Sanchez kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Dark Schnitzel attempts a suplex, but Sanchez blocks it with his leg. He irish whips Schnitzel into the ropes and then catches him with a swinging sleeperslam!
The fans cheer, and Casey Sanchez tries to wipe some of the blood out of his eyes. Casey Sanchez runs into the ropes and punt kicks Dark Schnitzel in the face
Guillermo O'Bannon: Casey Sanchez goes to pick Dark Schnitzel up but the Schnizzle grabs Sanchez's nuts with a testicular claw! He reaches out with those long arms and tags in Bob Lancelot. He pulls Sanchez's head into his legs while Lancelot climbs to the top turnbuckle. Spike piledriver!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Casey Sanchez kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Bob Lancelot drops back in a russian legsweep! He rolls on top of him in a pinning position!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Casey Sanchez kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Bob Lancelot climbs up to the top turnbuckle, and comes off with a clothesline!
The Palm Springs audience jeers and boos Lancelot. Lancelot climbs up to the top again and comes off with a flying legdrop, but Casey Sanchez rolls out of the way!! The fans come alive
Guillermo O'Bannon: Casey Sanchez atomic drops Bob Lancelot on the top turnbuckle, facing the audience. Sanchez climbs up to the second turnbuckle and half nelsons him. T-bone superplex!!
Hardkore Hall gets louder and a blood drenched Sanchez begins to catch his second wind. He shoots Lancelot into the ropes and smashes him in the face with a Mexican hammer! He traps both of Lancelot's arms
Guillermo O'Bannon: Double arm overhead suplex! Casey Sanchez tags in PJ Wright. Sanchez irish whips Lancelot into the ropes and lifts him up in a flapjack and Wright runs off the ropes with a rude awakening!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Bob Lancelot kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: PJ Wright full nelsons Lancelot and drops back into a dragon suplex!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Bob Lancelot gets his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Wright sits Lancelot on the top turnbuckle and climbs to the second rope. But Lancelot punches Wright until he falls to the mat below. Bob Lancelot jumps off and catches him with a flying huracanrana!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(PJ Wright kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Bob Lancelot pulls his head into his legs and then flips up into a Smashed Up powerbomb!!
Lancelot double underhooks his arms, but PJ Wright backdrops him. Wright climbs up to the top turnbuckle and waits for Lancelot to get to his feet
Guillermo O'Bannon: Flying pump crossbody!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Dark Schnitzel stomps the back of PJ Wright's head)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Casey Sanchez leaps off the top rope and takes out Dark Schnitzel with a flying clothesline! He picks Lancelot up in an electric chair as PJ Wright climbs to the top. Wright catches Lancelot in the face with a spinning heel kick!! The Potentially Dangerous Device!!
former prowrestling.com internet reporter Matt Boone: Not The PDD!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...thr- (Bob Lancelot kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: PJ Wright irish whips Bob Lancelot into the ropes. He dips down for a backdrop, but Bob Lancelot reverses with his swinging neckbreaker, The Swinging Bells!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...3!!!
"All My Life" by Foo Fighters plays and the crowd cheers. Bob Lancelot and Dark Schnitzel raise their arms and soak in the cheers
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "At 16 minutes 54 seconds; THE WINNERS OF THE MATCH, ADVANCING TO THE SECOND ROUND...THE DEVINE COMEDY!!!"
Guillermo O'Bannon: The Devine Comedy scores a big win, advancing to the second round to take on "The Heart Throb" Rich Andrews & "Magnificent" Ron Lauren.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Wow, J.C. South & Captain Jonathan Jones just showed up to the arena!
Phil Blauer: Fuckin traffic.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Our next match will be a series of firsts.
Phil Blauer: Like a date with Yolanda, first you get some, then you get crabs.
Guillermo O'Bannon: First, it will be our first intergender tag team match since September of 2004, when Tamara Sanchez teamed up with Paul Soutter to take on The Shootfighter & Judge Death in Oakland.
Phil Blauer: A classic not seen since the likes of Golddust & Marlena vs. Marc Mero & Sable.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Did they wrestle?
Phil Blauer: Who'm I, Rally?
Guillermo O'Bannon: Anyway, Kate Kealshaw, a woman who's gimmick is eerily close to Mrs. Steven Speilburg's, will team with Tristan Kancer tonight in the first woman to ever compete in the Frank A. Marano Jr. Memorial Cup. Her first challenge will be J.C. South and Captain Jonathan Jones.
Phil Blauer: Is he a nautical captain?
Guillermo O'Bannon: As much as Captain Morgan or Captain Crunch.
Phil Blauer: ...so should I salute?
As “Slutgarden” by Marilyn Manson begins, Manson’s voice cuts through Hardkore Hall while the lights slowly dim to black. Lighters in the crowd begin to flicker as most fans don’t want to miss anything that could happen
Phil Blauer: (holds up his lighter) Woooo!!! SKYNARD!!!
A red spotlight hits the stage as “The Dark Horse Of Professional Wrestling” Tristan Kancer steps from behind the curtain. Those fans who’ve seen GCW know what to expect, and they cheer, but from the rest he gets a moderate reaction. He’s not phased by the reaction, choosing to just smirk as he heads to the ring, knowing that he’ll get a bigger reaction once things get going. He slides under the bottom rope, and turns, giving his evil glare as he waits for his partner. Then a shadow of a Phoenix omits from the Hardkore Hall floor swooping through up to stage screeching before it dissappears. A light glow engulfs the arena as the sound of angels singing fills the air with a harmonic feeling. The soothing sounds of acoustic guitars fills the arena as gnetle light fills the air giving the place a peacful aura. this is soon put to a hault as "Take This Life" by In Flames. Then flames shoot up from the stage Kate appears from behind the curtains covered by a large leather trench coat, the flames flicker in beat with the music and Kate makes her way down the ring, she hops onto the apron and more flames explode out of the four corners of the ring, Kate then procedes to her corner getting herself ready for the match
Phil Blauer: And with that, we've exhausted our pyrotechnic budget for the entire evening.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Tristan Kancer is a former two time GCW Undisputed Champion, GCW Intercontinental Champion, and GCW Tag Team Champion. This isn't Kealshaw's first barbeque. She's been wrestling men for quite a while in GCW, where recently a bizarre series of events lead to the unfounded rumors that Kate Kealshaw had died. They even had a tribute show for her.
Phil Blauer: Oh my god...she's the undead! Take Yolanda, I'm rich and sumptious. Quick Guillermo, you have to shoot em in the brain! First one puts er down, then you put one in her brain. And watch out, they have differing strength levels depending on the movie your watching. Sometimes they can throw you through walls, while others they're more like Attack of the Geriatric Alcoholics.
former prowrestling.com internet reporter Matt Boone: They have good zombies too, like Swamp Thing or Abe Vigoda.
Yolanda Ando: Tristan Kancer wears a black shirt with red lettering declaring “The Kancer Shall...” on the front, and “Consume Us All” on the back accompanied by a biohazard symbol. Black Jeans. Black Military style boots, and black fingerless gloves. He also wears a long black trenchcoat. Kate Kealshaw wears a white tank top and black jeans plus new rock boots.
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "The following first round match is scheduled for one fall with a 30 minute time limit. Your referee is Ron Reid. Our first team represents GCW; in the corner to my right, from Parts Unknown; Standing 6 feet 2 inches tall; Weighing 224 pounds...TRISTAN KANCER!! His partner stands at 5 feet 10 inches tall...KATE KEALSHAW!! They are PHOENIX UPRISING!!!"
Phil Blauer: Tristan's last name strikes fear into the hearts of millions of Americans every day.
Yolanda Ando: And he spells it with a K which makes it cool.
Hardkore Hall cheers. Then sirens come on as "Fuck The Police" by N.W.A. blares onto the PA-System. From behind the curtains comes J.C. South. Coming out he grins showing off his teeth as they were casted in platnum with diamonds imbedded. Captain Jonathan Jones walks down talking shit to the Palm Springs fans as he slides in the ring. He climbs the turnbuckle, raises his arms, then talks more shit to the crowd. J.C. South begins to wave his arms in the air getting the crowd behind him. He then walks down to the ring and climbs in
Guillermo O'Bannon: J.C. South & Captain Jonathan Jones is a brand new team to the best of my knowledge. I like the tunes though. You gotta love rap from the era before Ice Cube sold out.
Phil Blauer: You think I should get my teeth like that, Guillermo?
Guillermo O'Bannon: I think you should get in the habit of brushing your teeth first. Those things are expensive.
Phil Blauer: I hear the Captain has a huge portfolio of naked boy pictures.
Guillermo O'Bannon: I'm pretty sure that's Jeffrey Jones.
Yolanda Ando: J.C. South sports a black no sleeve t-shirt, baggy black pants, and a black do-rag tied on his head. Captain Jonathan Jones wears long white tights, and a captain's jacket with the sleeves cut off.
Phil Blauer: The Captain looks like a gay Skipper.
Yolanda Ando: Oh, the Skipper was gay.
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "Their opponents; first from The Dirty South; Standing 6 feet 2 inches tall; Weighing 230 pounds...J.C. SOUTH!!! His partner is from Miami, Florida; Standing 6 feet 6 inches tall; Weighing 280 pounds...CAPTAIN JONATHAN JONES!!!"
The crowd boos. Tristan Kancer and J.C. South start out. They lock up in a collar & elbow tie-up
Guillermo O'Bannon: Kancer does a go behind and applies a chicken wing. He wrenches up on South's arm, but South reaches back with a back elbow to Kancer's face. J.C. South overhead belly to belly suplexes him!
South bounces into the ropes and drops an elbow across Tristan Kancer's face. Kancer staggers up to his feet and South rushes him, but Tristan drops his throat on the top rope and then rolls him back into a cradle
Referee Ron Reid: 1...(J.C. South gets his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Kancer backs South into his corner with a flurry of european uppercuts and then tags in Kate Kealshaw.
The fans pop at the woman entering the ring to fight some men. Tristan Kancer waistlocks South and Kate Kealshaw comes off the ropes with a superkick! Kancer drops him backwards into a release german suplex
Guillermo O'Bannon: Kate Kealshaw arm drags J.C. South. She grabs South by the leg and twists it & drops down into a figure four leglock. She clamps down on South's twisted legs.
J.C. South sits up and screams some misogynistic obscenities at Kate Kealshaw. She grins and clamps down harder. J.C. South turns it over
Guillermo O'Bannon: Now Kate Kealshaw is the one in some pain, so she slips out. She turns around into a spear by J.C. South!
Hardkore Hall rocks with boos as J.C. South smiles over Kate Kealshaw. J.C. South textbook suplexes Kealshaw
Guillermo O'Bannon: J.C. South bounces into the ropes and drops a leg across Kealshaw's beautiful face. He tags in Captain Jonathan Jones. J.C. South irish whips Kealshaw into the ropes and he & Jones double clotheslines her!
Kealshaw's head whips back from the impact. The fans boo Captain Jonathan Jones as he pulls her up into a crotch-tie. He pulls her up by the arm into a pumphandle slam! The boos get louder as Jones climbs to the top turnbuckle
Guillermo O'Bannon: Captain Jonathan Jones comes off with a flying legdrop!!
Phil Blauer: That legdrop has wings!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...thr- (Tristan Kancer stomps Jones' back)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Jones stands up and brawls with Kancer while Ron Reid tries to get him to go back to his corner. Kate Kealshaw sneaks up behind Jones and drops back into a russian legsweep!
The Palm Springs fans come to life. Kate Kealshaw moves in for the kill with an STF! She clamps down on Captain Jonathan Jones' windpipe, trying to choke him out
Guillermo O'Bannon: Jonathan Jones trying not to be the first man to tap out to a woman in Hardkore history. J.C. South runs into the ring and drops a knee behind Kealshaw's head! She staggers up and Jones catches her with an RKO!!
Jones tags in J.C. South. They both grab a leg and give Kate Kealshaw a double grapevine leglock! Kealshaw howls in pain as both men try to twist her legs out of their sockets
Guillermo O'Bannon: Tristan Kancer enters the ring to stop them, but gets cut-off by Ron Reid, allowing South & Jones to torment her even longer. After a few unneccesary agonizing moments, Reid forces Jones to break his half of the leglock. J.C. South turns it into an ankle lock.
Kate Kealshaw yelps in pain, trying to crawl away from J.C. South but he stands firm. He wrenches her foot to the side, trying to force a submission. He turns her over onto her back and spinning toe holds her into a figure four leglock
Guillermo O'Bannon: Dirty South Figure 4 Leg Lock!! J.C. South and Captain Jonathan Jones are trying to break her legs! She grabs on to Ron Reid's shirt in agony but then thinks better of it when her hands come back dirtier than when they left.
Tristan Kancer climbs to the top turnbuckle and jumps off with a double stomp to J.C. South's chest!! The crowd roars. South breaks the Dirty South Figure 4 Leg Lock, and Kate Kealshaw limps up to her feet
Guillermo O'Bannon: Kealshaw DDTs J.C. South! South gets up and catches another superkick under the chin!
Kate Kealshaw tags in Tristan Kancer and the fans erupt. Kancer shoots J.C. South into the ropes and tiltawhirls him into a quebradora con hilo backbreaker
Guillermo O'Bannon: Kancer scoops South up and runs him into the turnbuckle, but South falls behind him and rams him into the turnbuckle. South hits Kancer low, in the testicals!
The fans boo as Tristan Kancer keels over. J.C. South implant DDTs him! He rolls him over into a pin
Referee Ron Reid: 1...(Tristan Kancer kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: J.C. South goes for a piledriver, but Kancer back body drops him! Tristan drops down to his knees with a bareback jawbreaker!
Phil Blauer: Must...not...make...Brokeback Mountain...joke. Getting...cliche....
former prowrestling.com internet reporter Matt Boone: That movie's a masterpeice. The best gay love story I've ever seen not starring Jeff Stryker.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Tristan Kancer climbs to the top turnbuckle and comes off with a flying splash, but J.C. South puts his knees up into Kancer's stomach! J.C. South fisherman's suplexes him!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Tristan Kancer gets his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: J.C. South tags in Captain Jonathan Jones. Captain Jonathan Jones pulls Kancer's head into his legs while South climbs to the top turnbuckle. Spike piledriver!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Tristan Kancer kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Jonathan Jones legdrops Tristan Kancer. He pulls Kancer up and irish whips him into the ropes, and catches him on the way back with a blackhole slam he calls The Whirlpool Slam!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Tristan Kancer kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Captain Jonathan Jones fireman's carries Kancer up on his shoulders. Kancer falls back behind Jones on his feet in an inverted facelock. Reverse DDT!!
The crowd cheers. Tristan Kancer facewashes Jones' face a few times. He pulls Jones up into a crucifix then drives the back of his head with a razor's edge!! The Palm Springs fans pop, and Kancer tags in Kate Kealshaw
Guillermo O'Bannon: Tristan Kancer turns Captain Jonathan Jones over into a boston crab. Kate Kealshaw limps into the ropes and baseball slides into Jones' face!
The audience applauds. Kealshaw swinging neckbreakers Jonathan Jones! She steps out on the apron, and slingshots herself onto the middle of the top rope
Guillermo O'Bannon: Kate Kealshaw comes off with a springboard tornado DDT!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Captain Jonathan Jones kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Kate headlocks Jones, but he drops her on the back of her head with a Captain's Slam!
The fans boo. Jonathan Jones easily lifts Kealshaw over his head and walks her over to the corner. He sits her on the top turnbuckle and climbs up to the second rope
Guillermo O'Bannon: Captain Jonathan Jones superplexes Kate Kealshaw!! He rolls on top of her in a pin!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Tristan Kancer stomps the back of Jones' head)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Ron Reid forces Kancer back to his corner. Jonathan Jones scoops Kealshaw up into a fallaway slam that tosses her across the ring...but she falls on her feet!
The crowd pops at the show of balance. Jonathan Jones rushes her with a clotheslines but she tumbles underneath it and tags in Tristan Kancer. The Palm Springs crowd erupts
Guillermo O'Bannon: J.C. South comes running in but Tristan Kancer catches him with The Kancer Diagnosis superkick!! Jonathan Jones gets The Kancer Diagnosis as well!!
Kate Kealshaw climbs to the top turnbuckle, and then she and Kancer deliver a spike piledriver on Jonathan Jones
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...thr-(J.C. South stomps Kancer's back)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Tristan Kancer scoops Captain Jonathan Jones up, but Jones slips behind him and applies an inverted facelock. He lifts Kancer up into a lifting reverse Pirate DDT!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...3!!!
“Fuck The Police" by NWA plays and the audience cheers
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "At 13 minutes 7 seconds; THE WINNERS OF THE MATCH, ADVANCING TO THE SECOND ROUND...CAPTAIN JONATHAN JONES & J.C. SOUTH!!!"
Phil Blauer: Well, better late then never.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Jones & South pull out the upset of the tournament by defeating GCW superstars Kate Kealshaw & Tristan Kancer!
Guillermo O'Bannon: Our next match is between UPW's Revolution X and Shingo & Masato. This match features three wrestlers from the burgeoning SWAT Rocky Mountains area. Jack Kross is a headliner over there after his feud with Killer, and Shingo & Masato just joined to head up their tag team division.
"Uh Huh" by Method Man begins to play. Uncle Kracka comes out smoking a cigarette and drinking a bottle of tequila. Then a shadowy figure steps out on the stage with his hands out.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Tequila?!?! But Sandman and Stone Cold only drink beer!
Phil Blauer: Just when you think they couldn't raise the level of extreme any higher...
The shadowy figure claps his hands together and pryo goes off and the lights come back on showing Jack Kross.
Phil Blauer: Who's who again?
Guillermo O'Bannon: That guy's Jack Kross. His uncle's the guy sliding.
Uncle Kracka slides in the ring, finishes the bottle, and throws it into the crowd.
Phil Blauer: DUCK!
Jack Kross gives some of the fans high fives and others that hate him he bad mouths.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Kross bad mouthing the woman Uncle Kracka hit with his tequila bottle!
former prowrestling.com internet reporter Matt Boone: You said it would be safe for my mother!
Phil Blauer: Read the back of her ticket.
Finaly Kross gets in the ring and stands on the second rope and more pyro goes of and the music stops. Uncle Kracka climbs the turnbuckle, raises his arms, and puts out his cigarette as the crowd boos him
Phil Blauer: The Palm Springs fan thinking since they can't smoke inside, neither should Kracka.
Guillermo O'Bannon: At the Rod Laver Arena in Melbourne, Australia, Jack Kross was defeated by his nemesis Killer at SWAT's New Year's Nightmare pay-per-view. Jack Kross' California tour hasn't been so pleasant either. Recently he was counted out during a threeway match with GCW Undisputed Champion James Tyrell & GCW Intercontinental Champion Akuma at the Save Mart Center in Fresno, California.
Phil Blauer: Plus he had to go to Fresno.
Guillermo O'Bannon: I don't know much about Uncle Kracka except for the horrible band he's named after.
Phil Blauer: I have it on good authority he's sponsored by Phillip Morris Hoffman.
Yolanda Ando: Jack Kross is wearing blue jeans and a black shirt with the Revolution X logo on it.
Phil Blauer: Oh, see, that's his problem right there.
Yolando Ando: ...He also wears steel-toe boots.
Guillermo O'Bannon: You must love his flagarent disregard for the rules. I mean, even you know he's cheating.
Yolanda Ando: Yeah, but I had to blow him to find out. You don't think I'm reading off some sheet they give me? My job takes some real journalistic hutspah. Now, as I was saying, Uncle Kracka is wearing blue jeans, a black t-shirt with the Revolution X logo, a jeans jacket, and a blue bandana on his head.
former prowrestling.com internet reporter Matt Boone: He smells like a Chevron station.
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "The following first round tag team match is scheduled for one fall with a 30 minute time limit. Your referee is Mike Peters. Featuring first, representing UPW; From Queens, New York; Standing 6 feet 2 inches tall; Weighing 245 pounds...'THE SUICIDE MESSIAH' JACK KROSS!! His partner is from New York City; Standing 6 feet 4 inches tall; Weighing 277 pounds...UNCLE KRACKA!! They are REVOLUTION X!!!"
The Palm Springs fans boo. Then “Romantic Rights” by Death From Above 1979 begins. The bass hits on the down beats, followed by string scratches. When the kick drum pounds on the beats, Shingo and Masato come out with their hardest look, followed by former Hardkore Nippon Junior Heavyweight Champion "Sweet" Richard Romero, who stands between them. Romero raises their arms victoriously. Once the main riff starts, they make their way to the ring, ignoring the crowd entirely, and Romero drops back behind them. When they get to the ring apron, Romero finds his corner post and lets his protégés` take the lime light. Masato enters the ring between the top and middle ropes, while Shingo swings his legs over top rope in an impressive display of agility. They loosen up while waiting for the bell to ring
Guillermo O'Bannon: "Sweet" Richard Romero returns to Hardkore World...sort of. He had a thrilling series in 2003 over the Hardkore Nippon Junior Heavyweight Championship with Tuxedo Mask.
Phil Blauer: '03? That's so long ago, we had Al Queda on the run.
Guillermo O'Bannon: He also had a legendary semi-final match with Andrew Karnage in the Hardkore Nippon Grand Championship Tournament. Now he returns to Hardkore World, at least for this tournament, to manage two of his best proteges.
Phil Blauer: He's Vincent Silvestri without the class.
Yolanda Ando: Shingo wears silver trunks with the rising sun on the ass. He wears black wrestling boots. Masato wears a silver wrestling signet with the Rising Sun in his stomach. He wears black wrestling boots.
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "And their opponents, representing SWAT Rocky Mountains; Accompanied to the ring by their manager, "Sweet" Richard Romero; Both hail from Komatsu, Ishikawa Prefecture, Japan; First, standing 5 feet 6 inches tall; Weighing 195 pounds...MASATO!! His partner stands 6 feet tall; Weighing 170 pounds...SHINGO!!
The Palm Springs crowd roars. Mike Peters signals for the bell and Shingo & Jack Kross elect to start out
Guillermo O'Bannon: Jack Kross irish whips Shingo into the ropes and lifts him into the lights with a high back body drop!
The fans boo Kross. Kross grabs an armbar and squeezes his bent elbow. He sticks his knee into the ball of Shingo's shoulder and pulls back on his arm
Guillermo O'Bannon: Shingo kips up to his feet and arm drags Jack Kross by his armbarred arm. He twists Jack Kross' arm. He gives it another wrench, and then starts laying into Kross' chest with some knife edge chops.
Phil Blauer: Shingo sounds like a dance from the 60's.
Guillermo O'Bannon: I feel like I should whisper it because it might be racist.
Shingo backs Kross into the corner and tags in Masato. Masato sits on the top turnbuckle and braces himself, while Shingo climbs atop his shoulders for a little extra altitude
Guillermo O'Bannon: Shingo jumps off of Masato's shoulders and catches Kross in the face with an elbow smash! Masato scoops Jack Kross up and bodyslams him.
Masato runs into the ropes and drops an elbow across Kross' face. He climbs to the top turnbuckle but Uncle Kracka runs over and grabs him by the leg and crotches him on the the turnbuckle steel cable hook
Guillermo O'Bannon: Jack Kross superplexes Masato Yoshida!
The audience boos Jack Kross.
former prowrestling.com internet reporter Matt Boone: Things haven't been the same since he split with his older brother Kriss. Word backstage is his Uncle has taken on the mentor persona.
Guillermo O'Bannon: That explains why they're dressed alike.
He bounces into the ropes and legdrops him. He scoops Masato up and easily tosses the 195 pounder across the ring with a fallaway slam
Guillermo O'Bannon: Kross tags in Uncle Kracka. Kross irish whips Masato into the ropes and he & Kracka double clothesline him! Uncle Kracka textbook suplexes Masato.
Masato rolls out of the way of an elbow drop. He headbutts Uncle Kracka, and then irish whips him into the ropes
Guillermo O'Bannon: Masato backdrops Uncle Kracka! Kracka stands up and just misses getting nailed with a forearm. He counters with a german suplex!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Masato gets his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Uncle Kracka tags Jack Kross back in, and they double DDT Masato!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Masato kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Jack Kross turns Masato over into a boston crab. He rocks back on Masato's legs, while Peters asks him if he wants to tap out.
Masato shakes his head "no", but Shingo enters the ring and rolls into a kangaroo kick to Jack Kross' back, breaking the boston crab
Guillermo O'Bannon: Masato scoops Kross up and dropping him onto his knee in a backbreaker. Jack Kross ducks underneath a back elbow and counters with a belly to belly suplex!
Jack Kross irish whips Masato into the ropes, and runs at him with a clothesline, but Masato ducks. Kross comes back from the other side of the ropes, and Masato tiltawhirl suplexes him
Guillermo O'Bannon: Masato tags in Shingo, and then electric chairs Jack Kross onto his shoulders. Shingo climbs to the top turnbuckle and leaps off into a flying clothesline to Kross!! Doomsday Device!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Jack Kross kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Shingo irish whips Jack Kross into the ropes and then hits him flush in the face with a spinning crescent kick!
Shingo climbs to the top rope and flies off with a plancha, but Jack Kross catches him and powerslams him hard into the mat! The Palm Springs fans boo as Kross hooks his leg
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Shingo kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Jack Kross pulls Shingo up in a front facelock and then swings into a twist of fate!
The boos are deafening as Jack Kross climbs to the top turnbuckle. Masato runs over and trips Kross, crotching him on the turnbuckle. Shingo runs up to the second turnbuckle and fireman's carries him on his shoulder
Guillermo O'Bannon: Rolling hangover!! Shingo snap suplexes Jack Kross into the corner, and then tags in Masato. He and Shingo stuff powerbomb Jack Kross!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Jack Kross kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Masato runs Kross' eyes along the ropes, until Kross back elbows him in the gut. He grabs a side headlock on Jack Kross, grinding his forehead into Masato's temple.
Masato pushes Jack Kross off into the ropes, and then lou thez presses him
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Jack Kross gets his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Masato climbs to the top turnbuckle, but Uncle Kracka hangs onto his foot. While he's trapped, Jack Kross climbs up to meet him on the top turnbuckle...super bomb!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Shingo kicks Kross in the back of the head)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Jack Kross wraps up Masato's legs and turns him over into a texas cloverleaf! He bends Masato's spine backwards, crouching as low as he can.
Hardkore Hall boos Jack Kross and he talks back to an especially loud couple in the front row. He reaches out and tags in Uncle Kracka, who applies a crippler crossface while Kross maintains the texas cloverleaf
Guillermo O'Bannon: Uncle Kracka pulls up on Masato's head & arm while Jack Kross bends his legs towards his head. Mike Peters laying in the count, gets to five, and then forces Jack Kross out of the ring. Uncle Kracka irish whips Masato into the ropes and spinebusters him!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Masato kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: He pulls Masato up and flips him over in the Rollin a J belly to belly suplex!
Uncle Kracka waistlocks Masato and he back elbows him. He northern lights suplexes Uncle Kacka
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Uncle Kracka rolls his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Masato lifts Uncle Kracka up on his shoulders in a fireman's carry, then samoan drops him!
The audience cheers, and Masato lifts Kracka up in a hanging suplex, then drops him into a gourdbuster! He tags in Shingo. Masato electric chairs Uncle Kracka up onto his shoulders as Shingo climbs up to the turnbuckle
Guillermo O'Bannon: Masato walks Kracka towards Shingo who missle dropkicks him off of Masato's shoulders!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Uncle Kracka kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Shingo shoots Uncle Kracka into the ropes and hits him with a diving lariot!
The audience is deafening, as Uncle Kracka pulls himself up by the ropes. Shingo goes for a hiptoss but Kracka blocks it and lifts him up onto his shoulders in a fireman's carry. He swings him around into a TKO
Guillermo O'Bannon: Uncle Kracka lifts Shingo up into a hanging suplex, then drops him down into a brainbuster!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Shingo kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Uncle Kracka climbs to the top turnbuckle, but "Sweet" Richard Romero jumps up on the apron. He shakes the ropes and crotches Kracka on the top turnbuckle. Shingo runs up the ropes, and takes him over in a huracanrana!!
The Hardkore Hall pops and Shingo climbs up to the top turnbuckle. He leaps off into a frog splash from the lights
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Uncle Kracka kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Shingo tags in Masato. Masato sticks both of his knees into Uncle Kracka's back and then rolls him up into a bow & arrow. Shingo climbs up to the top turnbuckle and flips into a cannonball to Uncle Kracka's exposed stomach!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...3!!!
The Palm Springs Convention Center erupts as “Romantic Rights” by Death From Above 1979 plays. "Sweet" Richard Romero hits the ring and raises both his protege's arms
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "At 15 minutes 11 seconds; THE WINNERS OF THE MATCH, ADVANCING TO THE SECOND ROUND...MASATO & SHINGO!!!"
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sweet Dick's team comes out smelling like an ashtray and advances!
(Dr. Tojo Sushi walks to the podium.)
Dr. Tojo Sushi: (taps the mic to make sure it's on) Good evening. I would like to take a moment to talk to you about JoJo Sushi presents: Hardkore Nippon. This month, tune in to see The Rising Sun probably win the Hardkore Nippon Grand Championship. JoJo needs somebody to hold the title until he puts in on Syberus, then eventually himself, and can think of nobody more up for the job than Sun.
(Advancing to his next index card.)
Dr. Tojo Sushi: Two champions and only one belt! That's the Hardkore Nippon Western Pacific title picture for you. Gozo Shioda and The Shootfighter treated Arakawa like their punk ass bitch before they both pinned him at the exact same time. This month, in Sendai, each man defends his half of the championship; Shioda wrapped in barbed wire against his arch rival Akira Kyoto. And The Shootfighter faces American pro wrestling superstar "Big Time" Carson Parker in HIS match; a stainless steel singapore cane ladder match.
(Advancing to his next index card.)
Dr. Tojo Sushi: At Palm Springs Punishment we will award the Hardkore Nippon Junior Heavyweight Title to the winner of an over the top rope royal rumble style battle royal LIVE via satelitte from Bangkok, Thailand. Sign up now. Big things are happening in JoJo Sushi presents: Hardkore Nippon.
(Advancing to his next index card.)
Dr. Tojo Sushi: JoJo sees the next generation of Hardkore Nippon superstars in this tag team tournament. Mike Hunt, you have it on direct authority, JoJo likes what he sees. You got...IT. JoJo knows IT when he sees IT. Now create a Japanese alter ego and bring IT over to JoJo Sushi presents: Hardkore Nippon before you lose IT gaying it up in GCW.
(Tojo goes off script.)
Dr. Tojo Sushi: GCW is not gay because of you, it's gay in spite of you Mike Hunt.
(Back to his notes.)
Dr. Tojo Sushi: I would also like to extend an invitation on be half of JoJo to The Kross Brothers, Jack and Kriss, and their uncle Kracka Kross. Come to Nippon, JoJo has a hard on for brother tag teams and family stables.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Coming up is a match I've been waiting for since the brackets were announced. The New Axis vs. Praised or Persecuted. Four legendary wrestlers from UCW & GCW come together for the very first round of the Frank A. Marano Jr. Cup.
Phil Blauer: This one could main event anywhere in the world! Which one is Persecuted again?
Hardkore Hall goes dark as the wailing guitar begins. Spotlights travel back and forth along the Palm Springs crowd as the roar becomes deafening. BANG! The pyro explodes and a row of flames appear on the right and left hand side of the aisle. The drums louden as the Outrider cruises down the aisle and through the fires on his custom made, gun-metal, Harley. He circles the ring once and then parks the bike near the announcer's table
Phil Blauer: Oh yeah, I saw that at Undertaker's yard sale. It's the only one small enough for arena aisles.
Guillermo O'Bannon: GCW Hall of Famer Outrider is a two time GCW Undisputed Champion and former GPW Heavyweight Champ. He also has one of the most involved ring entrances of the tournament.
Outrider takes off his long black leather jacket and draping it along the seat. The Dark Rider then pulls himself up on to the apron and enters the ring through the second and third ropes. Stepping to the dead center he tightens his gloves firmly to each hand and removes his sunglasses before throwing them blindly to the Palm Springs fans. Suddenly, the ever familiar guitar rift of the incomparable and controversial Michael Hunter plays with POD’s “Boom”. The music blares through out the sea of humanity while reaching every fan in attendance along with white and red strobe lights that flicker through out the Hardkore Hall ceiling. As the Palm Springs crowd explodes with a standing ovation mixed with some jeers towards “The Man“, Hunter charismatically shows up on stage yelling, smiling and posing by flexing and pointing to his bicep before making his way down the ramp with his regular swagger. He suddenly gets in the camera man’s lens and mouths the words “I am The Man“
Phil Blauer: Did you get that, Guillermo? He da man!
Guillermo O'Bannon: He certainly is. He's a two time GCW Undisputed Champion, NEW World Heavyweight Champion, WEF Universal Champion, EWF Intercontinental Champion, two time EWF Atlantic Champion, plus a WEF Extreme-core Champion.
Phil Blauer: Extreme-core? Was that unifying snafu, or was that after he won US-Continental Title?
Following that, Mike Hunter pushes the camera away, then looks to the crowd, gives some high fives to the guys and a few kisses to the females in the front row. Just as Hunter gets to the center of the runway, a wall of dazzling pyros follows him to the ring as he projects that good ol’ vintage Hunter cocky smile. When he gets to the squared circle he poses at two corners before getting in the center of the ring, dropping to one knee and flexing his arms as pyros shoot out from behind him starting at the two corners and making their way to the center where they clash in a spectacular display of pyrotechnics. Hunter then begins to do some mock push ups before he runs against the ropes like Ric Flair for a laugh before he gets ready for the match
Guillermo O'Bannon: These two know each other really well. They were voted feud of the year by prowrestling.com.
former prowrestling.com internet reporter Matt Boone: Got my vote. Also, make sure to click below to read why Jeff Jarrett will be on Raw this Monday. FREE TORRIE PICS!!
Phil Blauer: Free! Who's Torrie?
Yolanda Ando: Michael Hunter wears some red, silver and black army fatigue wrestling tights, Black and white wrestling boots. Black wristbands and finger gloves. Outrider wears black sleeveless T-shirt that says "Judgement is Coming" on the front and "Ride Out!" on the back. Black leather riding gloves. Fitted leather pants. Black leather riding boots.
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "The following first round match is scheduled for one fall and a 30 minute time limit. Your referee is Ron Reid. Featuring first, representing GCW; Featuring first, from Parts Unknown; Standing 6 feet 1 inch tall; Weighing 240 pounds...THE OUTRIDER!! His partner is from New York City; Standing 6 feet 1 inch tall; Weighing 228 pounds...'THE INFAMOUS' MICHAEL HUNTER!! They are PRAISED OR PERSECUTED!!!"
The Palm Springs crowd cheers. A huge countdown clock appears and a voice starts to talk….
Guillermo O'Bannon: Yippie! A countdown.
David Sadler will steal the show in 5 seconds
David Sadler will steal the show in 4 seconds
David Sadler will steal the show in 3 seconds
David Sadler will steal the show in 2 seconds
David Sadler will steal the show…………………….Boom fireworks shoot from the ramp. The fans beat the flames out on the beer guy.
"Bound to Violence" by Hatebreed starts up. The words "Bound to violence Gagged by pain Drowned in self-regret this grief is the sentence you face" sound then a brief pause as the background music continues. Just as the next verse hits a cloud of smoke engulfs the stage then Williams and Sadler emerge just the next verse kicks in "Incomplete, you've lost your way Struggling with rationale In a world so cold and bleak How could this be a place for you?". Black and white lights violently flash all around the arena as both men head to the ring. They walk with a blank face concentrating solely on the ring not letting anything stop them. Lee steps over the top rope while Sadler climbs through the ropes and as they enter the ring the go to opposite turnbuckles doing their signature gestures. They dismount from the turnbuckles then talk to each other waiting
Guillermo O'Bannon: David Sadler & Lee Williams are two of UCW's biggest stars; they're former GCW & UCW World Tag Team Champions. They also have been feuding with GCW's biggest stars as of late and have been licking their chops to get their hands on these two.
Phil Blauer: Lee Williams told me of all the teams to get in the first round, this was the toughest draw.
Guillermo O'Bannon: You talk to Lee Williams?
Phil Blauer: Sure do, I was doing a piece on foreigners and whether their presence in our country rots it from within.
Guillermo O'Bannon: For what?
Phil Blauer: For fun.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Lee Williams and Dave Sadler have had a run of bad luck lately. David Sadler tapped out to SWAT World Heavyweight Champion Nic Collyer's Minor Threat at the main event of St. Valentine's Day Broken Hearts on pay-per-view. The New Axis also recently lost a UCW match at The Carrier Dome, in Syracuse, New York to The Impact Playaaaas, Brandon Smith & Jermaine Daniels.
Phil Blauer: Wasn't that Lance Storm & Justin Credible?
Guillermo O'Bannon: That was the Impact Players.
Phil Blauer: Oh.
Yolanda Ando: Lee Williams wears black elbow/knee pads and boots.
Phil Blauer: Thank God I bought that black elbow/knee pad stock. It's paying off like weaponary.
Yolanda Ando: He's also wearing a black tank top with Lee Williams in white on the front and his initials “LW” centred in a logo on top of a cross on his back, which is also in white. Black pants with “The Way of the Williams” on his left leg which is in white, then a large white cross on his right leg. David Sadler wears baggy cut off jean shorts. Black knee and elbow pads and white boots with black trim. Pale skinned with blue eyes, long brown hair and clean shaven.
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "Representing UCW; From Essex, England; Standing 6 feet 11 inches tall; Weighing 322 pounds...'THE REVOLUTION OF WRESTLING' LEE WILLIAMS!! His partner is from Ipswich, England; Standing 5 feet 11 inches tall; Weighing 250 pounds...'THE SAVIOUR OF PROFESSIONAL WRESTLING' LEE WILLIAMS!! They are THE NEW AXIS!!!"
The fans give them a mixed reaction. Lee Williams and Outrider elect to start off. Outrider hits Williams with a double ax handle
Guillermo O'Bannon: Outrider applies a million dollar dream on the big man. He pulls back on Williams' arm and applies pressure to the back of Lee's neck.
Outrider jumps onto the back of Lee Williams to try and get some leverage on the near seven footer. Williams backs Outrider into the corner, crushing him with his 322 pounds
Guillermo O'Bannon: Lee Williams sticks his boot in Outrider's throat, choking him with his leg fully extended. He then rams his knee into Outrider's stomach a few times.
Lee Williams grabs the ropes and starts ramming his shoulder into Outrider's stomach, before tagging in Dave Sadler. Lee Williams and David Sadler pull Outrider out of the corner with a front facelock
Guillermo O'Bannon: The New Axis double DDT Outrider!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...(Michael Hunter stomps David Sadler's back)
Guillermo O'Bannon: David Sadler smashes Outrider in the face with a few hard rights. Sadler ends it with a hard forearm smash across his chin. He shoots Outrider into the ropes, but he comes back with a flying forearm to Sadler's face!
The crowd cheers. Outrider snap suplexes Sadler, and then applies an STF! He pulls up on Sadler's head, clamping down on his windpipe. Ron Reid checks in to see if Sadler wants to tap out but he refuses
Guillermo O'Bannon: Lee Williams runs in and breaks up the STF. Outrider rolls over and tags in Michael Hunter. Praised or Persecuted double gut wrench suplex David Sadler!
Michael Hunter belly to belly suplexes David Sadler over his shoulder. He pulls Sadler up by the hair, and irish whips him into the ropes
Guillermo O'Bannon: Michael Hunter spinning heel kicks David Sadler in the face! Sadler rolls out of the way of an elbow drop, and runs into the ropes. He nearly takes Hunter's head off with a Rage-line!
The Palm Springs fans boo. Michael Hunter stands up just in time to get caught on the button with a standing dropkick
Guillermo O'Bannon: David Sadler pulls Hunter up into a powerbomb, but Hunter reverses it into a huracanrana! He rolls over and tags Outrider back in. Outrider bearhugs Sadler as Hunter runs into the ropes. Hunter comes back with a hart attack clothesline!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(David Sadler kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Outrider pumphandle slams David Sadler in the center of the ring!
David Sadler pulls himself up by the ropes. Outrider moves in for the kill, but Sadler kicks him away. Outrider catches his boot, but Sadler swings around with an enzuigiri kick
Guillermo O'Bannon: David Sadler textbook suplexes Outrider! He shoots him into the ropes, but Outrider ducks under another Ragesline, and responds with a quick release german suplex!
The audience erupts. Outrider irish whips Sadler into the ropes, ducks down for a backdrop, but Sadler counters DDT! The fans boo, and Sadler tags in Lee Williams
Guillermo O'Bannon: David Sadler sets Outrider up in a rock bottom, but Lee Williams comes off the ropes with a big boot to Outrider's face while Sadler jams him into the mat with a uranage!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Outrider kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Lee Williams headbutts Outrider, and then irish whips him into the ropes. Outrider comes back with a hooked lariot!
Outrider goes for a suplex but Lee Williams is far too large. Lee reverses it and holds Outrider up in a hanging suplex. He shows them to all four corners of the Palm Springs Convention Center, then drops him to the mat with a suplex
Guillermo O'Bannon: Lee Williams pulls Outrider up by the hair but gets kicked in the stomach. Outrider hits him with a stunner!
The fans cheer. Outrider applies a dragon sleeper on Williams. He cranes Lee's head back, clamping down on his neck & chin. Ron Reid checks in to see if he submits
Guillermo O'Bannon: Outrider leans back on Lee Williams head with that dragon sleeper, then reaches out and tags in Michael Hunter. Hunter climbs to the top turnbuckle and Outrider releases the dragon sleeper. He walks over to the corner and Hunter moonsaults Lee Williams off of Outrider's shoulders!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Lee Williams kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Michael Hunter gets a running start and dropped an elbow in Lee's chest! He pulls Williams up and irish whips him into the ropes, he bicycle kicks him in the chest, but Williams no-sells it!
The Palm Springs fans boo. Williams smiles, and running clotheslines Michael Hunter! He pulls Hunter up by the hair, and lifts him in a fireman's carry
Guillermo O'Bannon: Lee Williams drops him on his head with The Green Mile!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Michael Hunter kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Williams wraps Hunter's leg around into a spinning toe hold, then drops down into a Figure Four Lee Lock! He clamps down on Hunter's bent kneecap, while Hunter reaches out to tag in Outrider.
The fans boo, and start to clap faster & faster for Michael Hunter to turn the figure four over. Hunter gets halfway over, with Ron Reid asking him if he wants to submit. But with Reid's back turned, he doesn't see David Sadler drag Lee towards his corner
Guillermo O'Bannon: With some help from Sadler, Lee is close enough to make the tag. Williams pulls Hunter's head into his legs as Sadler climbs to the top turnbuckle. Spike piledriver!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Michael Hunter kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sadler belly to back suplexes Hunter. He applies another figure four leglock! Michael Hunter sits up in pain, while Sadler uses those powerful legs to apply amazing pressure to Hunter's ankle & knee.
Michael Hunter clutches both sides of his hair in pain, and then reaches out for the bottom rope. Sadler shakes his head and says "He's not going anywhere." Michael Hunter scoots along the canvas, and is able to get to the bottom rope
Guillermo O'Bannon: Reid trying to get him to break the leglock, but Sadler will not stop! Outrider can't take anymore and enters the ring. Outrider stomps and kicks Sadler, forcing him to break the figure four.
That pops the fans and Michael Hunter limps up to his feet. Michael Hunter irish whips David Sadler into the ropes and drop toe holds him into an STF! Hunter has that arm locked tight around Sadler's throat. The front row of the audience slaps the railing chanting "TAP!! TAP!! TAP!! TAP!! TAP!!"
Guillermo O'Bannon: Hunter has The Standard Issue STF locked in! David Sadler reaches out for the ropes, but they're still too far. Michael Hunter pulls up on Sadler's head & neck, swinging for the fences. Lee Williams steps over the top rope and stomps Hunter's back, breaking up The Standard Issue.
Ron Reid forces Lee Williams back to his corner. Michael Hunter t-bone suplexes David Sadler and limps to the top turnbuckle from inside the ring
Guillermo O'Bannon: The 2004 GCW King of Death Match Tournament Winner Michael Hunter backflips into another gorgeous moonsault!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(David Sadler kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Michael Hunter tags in Outrider. Outrider pulls Sadler up into a powerbomb, and then Michael Hunter drops his good leg across his neck with a leg drop!! Outrider flips over into a cradle!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(David Sadler gets his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Outrider dragon suplexes David Sadler!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(David Sadler rolls his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Outrider bounces into the ropes, but Sadler catches him on the way back with a sidewalk slam!
The crowd boos. David Sadler irish whips Outrider into the ropes and backdrops him into the ropes
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sadler climbs to the top turnbuckle and comes off with a flying body press, but Outrider catches him and powerslams him! He scoops Sadler up and drills his head into the mat with a tombstone piledriver!
Outrider irish whips Sadler into the ropes and catches him with a spinebuster, but Sadler reverses it into a tornado DDT! He tags in Lee Williams
Guillermo O'Bannon: Lee Williams shoots Outrider into the ropes and The New Axis catch him with a 3D!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Michael Hunter breaks up the pin)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Lee Williams climbs to the top turnbuckle and dives off with a flying clothesline!
Hardkore Hall boos as Lee Williams has some words with Hunter in the corner. Williams climbs the ropes again, but this time Hunter limps over and shakes the ropes, crotching Williams on the turnbuckle! The crowd cheers
Guillermo O'Bannon: Outrider climbs up to the second rope and uses all of his might to full nelson slam Williams off the top rope To Hell!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Lee Williams kicks out)
Phil Blauer: What a match!
Guillermo O'Bannon: That To Hell move took alot out of Outrider and he has some trouble catching his breath. But Williams catches him by the throat with that massive hand. He chokeslams Outrider into the mat!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Outrider kicks out)
Lee Williams irish whips Outrider into the ropes, but Outrider ducks under a clothesline. He responds with a chicken wing crossface. Outrider's 10 inch shortfall with Lee makes the choke even more devastating, with Lee being bent backwards while having his elbow wrenched up
Guillermo O'Bannon: Lee Williams trying to back elbow Outrider with his good arm, but Outrider ducks and gives his arm another tug. Lee Williams backs into his corner and crushes Outrider in the turnbuckles again. Lee Williams cracks Outrider in the face with a few elbows and tags in Dave Sadler.
Lee Willams drops Outrider across his knee in a backbreaker. David Sadler climbs up to the top turnbuckle and comes off with an elbow drop, flipping him head over heels!! The fans boo
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Outrider kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Dave Sadler lifts him up into a powerbomb!! He cradles the legs!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Outrider gets his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sadler grabs a sleeper hold with Outrider on the mat.
Phil Blauer: Sadler slowing the match down. Which is good cause I have to run Snow Dogs back to the video store.
Sadler cuts off Outrider's air, squeezing his throat with his forearm. Outrider fights his way to his feet, and then drops down to his knees, shooting the top of his head through Sadler's chin
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sadler staggers around, and Outrider picks him up into a human torture rack. He flips him over into a burning hammer he calls Hung Jury!!
Phil Blauer: Why?
Guillermo shrugs. Outrider butterflies David Sadler's arms and then tosses him across the ring with a double underhook suplex
Guillermo O'Bannon: Outrider drops Sadler with an inverted DDT! He tags in Michael Hunter, who sets Sadler up in a russian legsweep. Outrider comes off the ropes with a flying forearm while Hunter drops back in a russian legsweep!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(David Sadler kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Michael Hunter lifts Sadler up in suplex, then drops his feet on the ropes and 25th Hour slingshot suplexes him!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(David Sadler kicks out)
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "Twenty Minutes Have Elapsed. 10 Minutes Remaining."
Guillermo O'Bannon: Michael Hunter piledrives David Sadler!! He climbs to the top turnbuckle and backflips into a moonsault but Sadler rolls out of the way!!
Hunter's stomach hits the mat hard, and Sadler leg drops the back of his head. David Sadler climbs to the top turnbuckle
Guillermo O'Bannon: David Sadler comes off the top with a flying elbow!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Michael Hunter kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sadler irish whips Michael Hunter into the ropes with a yakuza kick! He tags in Lee Williams. The New Axis double spinebusters Michael Hunter!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...thr- (Michael Hunter kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Lee Williams scoops Hunter up and tosses him over his shoulder in a fallaway slam, then catches his head in a neckbreaker! Moment of Clarity!
Phil Blauer: What a manuever!
Guillermo O'Bannon: Lee Williams shoots Hunter into the ropes but Mike comes back with a hart attack clothesline!
The crowd cheers wildly. Michael Hunter stands up onto the second turnbuckle and comes off with a spinning heel kick
Guillermo O'Bannon: Hunter half nelsons Williams, but Lee back elbows him. English Leg Sweep!
Phil Blauer: Does everyone get a leg sweep?
Guillermo O'Bannon: Michael Hunter irish whips Williams, but Lee reverses it and shoots him into the ropes. Michael Hunter slides through Lee Williams' legs, and comes up from behind Lee. He Incursion running bulldogs Williams' throat on the top rope!
The audience cheers louder. Michael Hunter tags in Outrider. Outrider side backbreakers Lee Williams while Hunter climbs to the top turnbuckle
Guillermo O'Bannon: Michael Hunter comes off the top rope with a leg drop, flipping him over Outrider's knee!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...thr- (David Sadler stomps the back of Outrider's head)
Guillermo O'Bannon: The Outrider smacks Lee Williams on the side of his head with a Double Barrell shining wizard with both knees!!
Lee Williams drops to one side. The Outrider twists his knees up and turns Williams over into a texas cloverleaf! He rocks back on Lee Williams spine, as Williams tries to crawl over to the ropes. Ron Reid asks him if he wants to tap out
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sadler in the ring once again and cracks Outrider in the head with a chair!!
The sound of the concussion rocks through Hardkore Hall, and the fans boo. The Outrider tips over to one side with Lee Williams' legs still in his hands. Michael Hunter limps into the ring and begins brawling with David Sadler, who rains on Hunter's face with Rage Punches
Guillermo O'Bannon: Lee Williams puts the chair over The Outrider's face and climbs to the top turnbuckle. He comes off with a leg drop to the chair over Outrider's skull!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...thr- (The Outrider gets his foot on the bottom rope)
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "Twenty Five Minutes Have Elapsed. 5 Minutes Remaining."
Guillermo O'Bannon: Lee Williams sets the chair up in the center of the ring. He grabs Outrider by the head and diamond cutters his throat on the back of the chair!!
The audience boos, as The Outrider wanders around the ring, clutching his throat. Lee Williams picks up the chair
Guillermo O'Bannon: Michael Hunter van daminators the chair into Lee Williams' skull!! The Outrider superkicks Lee Williams into a german suplex!! Persecuted!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...3!!!
The Palm Springs fans erupt as Screaming Tree's "Shadows of the Season" plays throughout Hardkore Hall
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "At 26 minutes 27 seconds; THE WINNERS OF THE MATCH, ADVANCING TO THE SECOND ROUND...PRAISED OR PERSECUTED!!!"
Guillermo O'Bannon: Easily the best match of the first round so far!! Praised or Persecuted go on to the next round, against the winner of The K.G.B. vs. The Microshocker & Bad Boy King Kong. The last match of the first round, coming up!
The Shootfighter is in the lockerroom looking solemn as he looks slowly at the camera. He is wearing his black knee length wrestling tights, black wrestling boots and his chest length hair is tied in a pony tail.)
The Shootfighter: "Tonight is the night that I've been waiting for for quite a while. Tonight is the Frank A. Marano, Jr. Memorial Tag Team Tournament. I plan to honor a man whom I respect a lot. Frank A. Marano, Jr. was a man despite his illness tried everything he could to keep the old UWA open."
(He gets up and slowly puts on his black robe with a red dragon on the back.)
The Shootfighter: "I almost started wrestling in the UWA/Florida Region but unfortunately the region and the entire promotion folded. At least he was willing to accept me....."
(He starts getting a disdainful look in his face.)
The Shootfighter: "That was when I was with those idiots The Brotherhood of the Hun. Only Adolph got to wrestle one match but I never got to wrestle! Well that's the past and this is the present!"
(He grows solemn again.)
The Shootfighter: "Now tonight I shall honor Marano's great name. I shall be teaming up with James Fierce and the KGB is going to win the tournament. True the money and the glory is great. The honoring of a man who was way ahead of his time is even better."
(The Shootfighter's face becomes a mask of hate, rage and fury.)
The Shootfighter: "This brings me to the opponents we face! Microshocker and King Kong Bad Boy! I've just about had it with your constant bragging about beating me! One little victory by way of your using that joke of a manager Mr. Computer! One little victory and you consider that the greatest victory of your career! Well you are going to find out the truly hard way Microshocker that that was just a fluke!"
(He slowly goes over to a corner and picks up his stainless steel singapore cane and caresses it lovingly.)
The Shootfighter: "Have you ever been bashed over and over again in your skull with this Microshocker! Well you're going to find out how it's like to eat your own words as I unleash my hate, rage and fury upon you! This cane is going to crash into yopur skull again and again! When your bodyguard enters I'll give him some of this too! That way you two love objects can be nice and comfortable lying next to each other in the ring! Meanwhile the KGB moves on!"
(The Shootfighter's face grows even more angrier.)
The Shootfighter: "Why did you ever bother returning to Hardkore World when you are nothing but a loser and shall always be a loser!
Why not stay forever in SWAT so you can at least claim you did something significant! You returned here and you continue your pathetic record of embarrassing yourself! I'll seal your fate once and for all! You'll have to watch when James Fierce and I win the whole tournament! Prepare for great pain and agony that even you haven't experienced! Prepare for Mortal Kombat!"
(The lockerroom door opens and Judge Death enters with two Hooded Men. He is wearing black judges robes, black boots, a white Colonial Era wig, a metal gargoyle's mask and wields a cane that has a gargoyle's head on the top.)
Judge Death: "Are you prepared for the first round tag match."
The Shootfighter: "I am. I'm doing this to honor Marano."
Judge Death: "Yes a fine goal it is too. Glory and money is good but honoring one of the great promoters is even better. I remember my days in UWA/Mid-South Region and I managed my men well but unfortunately they almost won the tag and six-man titles. Then the promotion folded. Oh well at least it's a fine cherished memory. Tonight you and Fierce are going to find Microshocker and King Kong Bad Boy guilty on all counts of perversion."
The Shootfighter: "Don't worry I plan to give him the most severe punishment! His bodyguard is going to get just as worse!"
Judge Death: "Save it all for the match and then keep saving it for the rest of the tournament appeals. The KGB has a lot more teams to compete against."
The Shootfighter: "I know."
Judge Death: "Then let us go and meet Fierce."
(They leave as the scene slowly fades to black.)
(The Hardkore World Cameraman is walking up the steps in the empty arena. he continues through the nosebleed seats until he sees a pale figure dressed in black leather. He reaches Vampira who is eating her meal.)
Vampira: "I thought you'd never get here. Imagine all this waiting and I got hungry so I decided to eat something before the ringsiders actually begin to enter this arena. Sit down and have a bite."
(The Hardkore World Cameraman reluctantly sits down.)
Vampira: "Don't worry I won't bite you."
(She lets out a hissing laugh.)
Vampira: "Please I was just joking. Why would I want to bite you. I'm already full from this meal I was eating. You're probably here to ask me about my opponent Tamara Sanchez."
(The Hardkore World Cameraman nods.)
Vampira: "Well she probably thought she was going to exit her favorite kind of match the champion. Then after she loses she realizes that she was the chump. She and everyone else were taking bets on how long I would last. What a bunch of losers especially Turner and Sanchez when they put big money into the betting pool and I lasted longer than they would have and in fact survived into the third cage despite losing the match."
(She smiles mischieviously.)
Vampira: "Oh Tamara I'm so sorry I had to collect from you and the rest of the women. I gave Microshocker his back since I don't accept play money. Wait that was Phil Blauer's too. Oh well I just enjoyed embarrassing them all."
(Vampira's smile broadens.)
Vampira: "Anyway back to Tamara. Yes we'll be having our third go around one on one. This time I shall be more aggressive and I shall be even more meaner and bloodthirsty than ever before. This match shall make my meal look like a small snack. Believe me the significance of this match is quite high. The winner gets the No. 1 Contender's spot and I shall be that individual."
(Vampira's expression grows serious.)
Vampira: "Yes Tamara I plan to beat you for the top spot to challenge Anj Turner. Besides, someone new should be the champion not the same old champions. Then again if I beat you and the Turner I would be joining them too. Still it would be quite refresshing to see a real true specimen of a woman win the title. I may even let you get a shot Tamara if Jonnie Valentine allows it. So tonight we'll go into the match with such determination and savagery. That one of us shall be bleeding real badly. Guess who it's going to be and it's not me."
(Vampira's face grows dark.)
Vampira: "So you'll be wishing you took whatever I say seriously, since you thought I was boring. Well tonight I'll show you how boring you are and how much I shall shut you up. Darkness descends and I shall rule!"
(The Hardkore World Cameraman screams as she lunges hissing and baring her teeth as the camera suddenly goes black.)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Coming up is the last match in the first round.
Phil Blauer: Finally, between this and the Shootfighter promos, you got a mother fucker havin' to pee.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Why didn't you go between matches, that's when Taz does it.
Phil Blauer: Yeah, but Cole holds the cup for him and you're being a dick about it.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Coming up we have former Hardkore World Champion James Fierce & former Hardkore West Coast Champion The Shootfighter vs. The Microshocker & Bad Boy King Kong.
Phil Blauer: That's a lot of gold on that side, plus The Shock just had an impressive non-loss in Hardkore Nippon.
"Renegades of Funk" by Rage Against the Machine plays and the audience cheers as Judge Death & Vampira lead The Shootfighter & James Fierce down to the ring. Fierce holds both SWAT Carribean title belts over his shoulders, while The Shootfighter weilds a stainless steel singapore cane
Guillermo O'Bannon: This is James Fierce's first match since he lost his Hardkore World Heavyweight Championship to Robert Hunglestien III in Portland in that thrilling match with only four seconds to spare.
Phil Blauer: It will go down as one of the classic Hardkore World Heavyweight Title Matches of all time.
Guillermo O'Bannon: The Shootfighter is also the only competitor in this tournament who knew Frank Marano Jr. personally. He's dedicating this tournament to his memory. Fierce usually teams with Soutter. They've held numerous World Tag Team titles together including in UCW. But tonight he teams with The Shootfighter, a change of pace to be sure. But The Shootfighter is one of the stiffest workers in the locker room, and definately someone I would like to have in my corner.
Phil Blauer: When will you understand that no one will ever be in your corner? Ever?
Yolanda Ando: That's mean. James Fierce is in a traditional wrestling singlet. The singlet is red at the top and transitions into black towards the thighs. On the back of the singlet the letters “KGB” are written in black. Fierce wears a black and red warm up jacket that has "Bandits" written on the left breast and "Fierce" underneath. He carries both SWAT Carribean singles titles on either shoulder. The Shootfighter wears knee length black wrestling tights, black wrestling boots, sharp studded forearm pads and a tight black robe with a red dragon on the back and wields a stainless steel singapore cane. Judge Death wears a Salem witch trial style wig & robe, a gargoyles mask and black boots & wields a cane with a gargoyles head on it.
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "The following is the last first round match in the Frank A. Marano Jr. Memorial Cup. It is scheduled for one fall with a 30 minute time limit. Your referee is Mike Peters. Featuring first, representing Hardkore America; Accompanied to the ring by Judge Death & Vampira; First from Bangkok, Thailand; Standing 5 feet 11 inches tall; Weighing 235 pounds...THE SHOOTFIGHTER!! His partner is from Washington, D.C but originally from West by gawd Virginia; Standing 6 feet 3 inches tall; Weighing 255 pounds; He is The Current SWAT Carribean Bermuda Triangle Champion & SWAT Carribean Heavyweight Champion...'THE FEROCIOUS BANDIT' JAMES FIERCE!! They are THE K.G.B.!!!"
The Palm Springs crowd roars then The Linux start up theme plays over and over again in an annoying loop which forces the fans to cover their ears with their hands. The Microshocker steps out to bask in the jeers with Bad Boy King Kong following behind him, carrying Mr.Computer
Guillermo O'Bannon: The Microshocker looking forward to getting in the ring with The Shootfighter again. They've feuded on & off for nearly a decade! He's been on a roll lately. The Microshocker recently won a Fans Bring Their Own Weapons rumble in Melbourne, Australia at the SWAT pay-per-view entitled New Year's Nightmare, recieving a shot at SWAT World Death Match Champion Reverend Cornelius Marsh. He lost that match to Marsh in Utah but in Joetsu, Japan he went to a time limit draw with former HFW World Heavyweight Champion Akira Kyoto.
Yolanda Ando: The Microshocker wearing a shimmering silver bodysuit with the ass cut out. Bad Boy King Kong wears really tight jeans and a black sleeveless shirt.
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "And their opponents represent Hardkore Nippon; Featuring first from The Smokey Mountains; Standing 6 feet 5 inches tall; Weighing 451 pounds...BAD BOY KING KONG!! His partner is from Seattle, Washington; Standing 6 feet; Weighing 200 pounds...THE MICROSHOCKER!!
Hardkore Hall boos. Mike Peters signals for the bell and James Fierce and Bad Boy King Kong elect to start out. Kong & Fierce lock up
Guillermo O'Bannon: Bad Boy King Kong getting the advantage in the collar & elbow tie-up, but then James Fierce wrenches his arm over in an armbar. Fierce applies pressure to Kong's bent elbow.
Bad Boy King Kong hiptosses Fierce over by his armbarred arm, but Fierce hangs on with the armbar. Kong pulls him up again and irish whips him into the ropes by his armbarred arm
Guillermo O'Bannon: James Fierce comes back and gets caught by a 451 pound sidewalk slam!!
Bad Boy King Kong runs into the ropes and then drops a massive elbow into James Fierce's chest
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(James Fierce kicks out)
Phil Blauer: We're barely a minute into this match and Bad Boy King Kong is already getting a two count! That was a powerful sidewalk slam.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Bad Boy King Kong fireman's carries Fierce up, but James lands on his feet behind him. He hits Kong in the neck with a martial arts strike that sends him to his knees.
Phil Blauer: Similar to the Vulcan nerve pinch.
James Fierce stands behind Bad Boy King Kong facing him. James Fierce grabs one of Kong's arms and pulls it behind his back. Fierce pulls up on Bad Boy King Kong's forearm applying pressure to his elbow and shoulder. From there Fierce steps over the Bad Boy King Kong's shoulder opposite the one in the armlock so it appears they are sitting facing away from him while reaching through his own legs keeping Kong in the hammerlock. James Fierce grabs the arm squatting over with his free arm and wraps his arm around it, pulling up to applying pressure to Bad Boy King Kong's arm
Guillermo O'Bannon: James Fierce with a hammerlock with a stepover armbar! James Fierce is squatting over Bad Boy King Kong's shoulder with one of his hands reaching through Kong's legs holding him in a hammerlock and behind Bad Boy King Kong's near arm, which James Fierce has wrapped up with their other arm.
Phil Blauer: I'm lost.
Guillermo O'Bannon: James Fierce almost has his arms crossed while keeping Bad Boy King Kong's arms locked. Mike Peters checks in to see if Kong wants to tap out.
Phil Blauer: He doesn't have any arms to tap with!
James Fierce lets go to tag in The Shootfighter. The Shootfighter takes over with a keylock on Bad Boy King Kong's arm. He wrenches up on Kong's arm, making him howl in pain
Guillermo O'Bannon: The Shootfighter wearing down the big man's arm with that keylock. He pulls him up into a snap suplex! He pops his hips and pulls him up into a second snap suplex. A third one completes The Three Amigos, but Bad Boy King Kong's too heavy and reverses with a textbook suplex!
Bad Boy King Kong bounces into the ropes and crushes his chest with an earthquake splash!! Mike Peters slides into position
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(The Shootfighter rolls Bad Boy King Kong back into a sunset flip)
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Bad Boy King Kong claps his legs together on The Shootfighter's head)
Guillermo O'Bannon: The Shootfighter fires back with some muy thai punches to Bad Boy King Kong's face, busting his nose!
He tags in James Fierce. Bad Boy King Kong is face down on the mat, James Fierce stands over his upper back. Fierce reaches under one of Kong's arms and locks his hands together. James Fierce then falls to the side opposite the arm he grabbed. Fierce is lying on his side and Kong is on his back, one of James' legs is under Kong's upper back and hooking his free arm. James Fierce's lower leg is in the free hand's arm pit and hooking the arm, with Fierce's foot. James Fierce throws his other leg over Bad Boy King Kong's trapped arm and then behind Kong's neck
Guillermo O'Bannon: Stranglehold Beta on Bad Boy King Kong! James Fierce's leg is pushing Bad Boy King Kong's neck forward and driving his chin into his chest. James Fierce pulls Bad Boy King Kong's arm out straight across Fierce's torso, trying to hyper extend his elbow.
Phil Blauer: Mike Peters asks Kong if he wants to tap, and Kong looks to be mulling it over.
Guillermo O'Bannon: The K.G.B. wearing down Bad Boy King Kong's arm in a team effort. Fierce yanks on Kong's arm again, making him howl. James Fierce turns it into a crippler crossface!
The audience cheers as James Fierce links his fingers together and pulls up on Bad Boy King Kong's head & arm. Bad Boy King Kong growls out refusals to submit to Mike Peters
Guillermo O'Bannon: James Fierce has the crippler crossface in tight...but The Microshocker runs in and punt kicks Fierce in the face! Bad Boy King Kong grabs Fierce and chokeslams him with his good arm!
Hardkore Hall boos. Bad Boy King Kong gets up to the second rope and then comes crashing down on Fierce's ribs with a 451 pound splash
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(James Fierce kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Kong backs James Fierce back with several knife edge chops into the corner. He tags in The Microshocker. The Shock scoops James Fierce up and bodyslams him. The Microshocker moves in for the kill with a Shocker Toehold Facelock, STF!
The Shock lifts up on Fierce's head & neck, choking him out. Fierce reaches out for the ropes but The Microshocker has him locked tight. Mike Peters asking Fierce if he wants to give up
Guillermo O'Bannon: James Fierce finally gets over the ropes and grabs hold. Peters forces a break of the STF. The Microshocker goes for a piledriver, but James Fierce backdrops him over! He irish whips The Shock into the ropes and spinebusters him!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(The Microshocker kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: James Fierce slams The Microshocker into the mat with a uranage! He pulls him up by the arm and pulls him in with a shortarm lariot!
James Fierce tags in The Shootfighter. The Shootfighter grabs The Microshocker from behind with a german suplex
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(The Microshocker rolls his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: The Shootfighter pulls him up in a powerbomb, but The Microshocker takes him over in a huracanrana! The Microshocker moves in for the kill, but The Shootfighter hits him low!
The fans cheer as The Microshocker tips over to one side. The Shootfighter waits for The Shock to get up. When he does Shootfighter rushes him with a russian sickle, but The Microshocker ducks
Guillermo O'Bannon: The Shootfighter rushes him again, but The Microshocker catches him with a powerslam! The Microshocker climbs to the top turnbuckle and comes off with an earthquake splash!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(The Shootfighter gets his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: The Microshocker tags in Bad Boy King Kong. Kong applies a cobra clutch on The Shootfighter. He pulls back on Shootfighter's arm while applying pressure to the back of his neck.
Phil Blauer: The Shootfighter's legs are getting rubbery! Like my rubbers.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Bad Boy King Kong irish whips The Shootfighter into the ropes and catches him on the way back with a powerslam!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(The Shootfighter kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Kong pulls Shootfighter up by the ponytail, but Shootfighter comes up swinging with a few heart punches.
Phil Blauer: Kong's got a lot of heart to punch. But most of it is clogged with half a Whopper.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Shootfighter then fires into his chest with a series of dragon claw strikes. The Shootfighter chops Bad Boy King Kong down to size with some knife edges that back him into the corner.
The Shootfighter tags James Fierce in. Fierce bulldogs Bad Boy King Kong out of the corner. He rolls him over then stands behind his head facing towards him. James Fierce lifts up Kong's arm and places one of his legs around the side of Bad Boy King Kong's head and bends his leg so his calf is under Kong's chin. James Fierce locks his leg in place with his other leg so his legs are forming a "4" around Bad Boy King Kong' head
Guillermo O'Bannon: The Triangle Hold!! James Fierce applies pressure with his legs, cutting off the supply of blood to the brain of Bad Boy King Kong. James Fierce also pulls back on Bad Boy King Kong's arm so it is between Fierce's legs. It's a combination of a Leg Lock Sleeper Hold and a Crucifix Armbar. Mike Peters checks in as Bad Boy King Kong screams bloody murder!
The Microshocker runs in and kicks James Fierce in the face, breaking up The Triangle Hold. Bad Boy King Kong rolls over to his side, clutching his elbow to his body. He staggers up and lifts James Fierce in a fireman's carry
Guillermo O'Bannon: A 451 pound samoan drop!! Bad Boy King Kong struggles to get to the second turnbuckle than comes off with a devastating elbow to James Fierce's chest!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(James Fierce kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Bad Boy King Kong gives Fierce a spinning toe hold then drops back into a figure four leglock! Those trunklike legs can snap Fierce's like a twig.
Phil Blauer: Well do it then. Do it. Do it.
Guillermo O'Bannon: James Fierce reaching out to the ropes which are so close yet so far.
Fierce grabbing at air as Bad Boy King Kong clamps down on his bent knee. Bad Boy King Kong reaches out and tags in The Microshocker. The Shock climbs to the top turnbuckle
Guillermo O'Bannon: The Microshocker frog splashes James Fierce's twisted legs while Bad Boy King Kong holds them in a figure four!!
Fierce rolls around the mat, clutching his kneecap. The Palm Springs fans boo as The Shock places James' foot on the bottom rope and then climbs to the top rope again
Guillermo O'Bannon: The Microshocker comes off the top with an elbow to James Fierce's extended leg! Fierce seems to be in heaps of pain and is straining to tag in The Shootfighter.
The audience claps faster & faster, rooting Fierce on to tag in The Shootfighter. The Microshocker flips James Fierce over his shoulder in a powerbomb, but Fierce rolls out of it and lands on his feet in front of The Shock
Guillermo O'Bannon: James Fierce gives The Microshocker a lo-down spinebuster!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(The Microshocker claps his legs together on Fierce's head)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Fierce grabs The Shock by the leg and karate chops him behind the knee. He whips him over into a dragon screw then tags in The Shootfighter. He applies an ankle lock on The Microshocker. He stands over The Shock wrenching his foot from side to side.
Mike Peters asks The Microshocker if he wants to submit, but he shakes his head. The Shootfighter wraps his legs around The Shock's thigh and drops to the mat, with his ankle firmly in The Shootfighter Anklelock
Guillermo O'Bannon: The Microshocker kicks him off, and then knees The Shootfighter in the stomach. The Microshocker gives The Shootfighter an F2 neckbreaker!
The Microshocker pulls Shootfighter's head into his legs and then piledrives him into the mat! The crowd boos as The Shock hooks his leg
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(The Shootfighter kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: The Microshocker limps into the ropes and goes for a kneedrop, but The Shootfighter rolls out of the way! The Shootfighter applies a figure four leglock!
The Microshocker animatedly sits up and back down over & over, trying to escape the figure four. The Shootfighter demands that he submit while the front row of the audience slaps the railing, chanting "TAP!! TAP!! TAP!! TAP!! TAP!!" Mike Peters crouches over him, asking him if he wants to give up
Guillermo O'Bannon: Bad Boy King Kong can't take anymore, and enters the ring. He breaks up the figure four with some stomps, but James Fierce comes in and knocks him out of the ring with a clothesline! The Shootfighter whacks The Shock's knees & ankles with a barrage of muy thai kicks.
The Shootfighter tags in James Fierce. Fierce sets The Microshocker up in a leg capture suplex, but then drops to his knees shooting his shoulder through the back of The Microshocker's knee
Guillermo O'Bannon: James Fierce applies a single leg boston crab on The Microshocker's aching leg. He rocks back on The Shock's leg, hyperextending the knee.
Phil Blauer: Bad Boy King Kong knows how much The Microshocker needs those knees. He spends most of his time on them.
Guillermo O'Bannon: James Fierce plants his foot and yanks back on The Microshocker's calf, but The Shock trips him up and breaks the half crab. He slams Fierce into the mat with a uranage he calls The Shockbottom!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(James Fierce kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: The Microshocker lifts James Fierce up in a hanging suplex, then drills him headfirst with an F3 Brainbuster!!
The Microshocker pulls his head into his legs, then flips him into a dominator!! The audience jeers and boos and Bad Boy King Kong gets tagged in
Guillermo O'Bannon: Bad Boy King Kong gut wrenches James Fierce up into a tigerbomb!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(James Fierce claps his legs together on Kong's head)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Bad Boy King Kong climbs to the second rope and comes off with an earthquake splash to James Fierce's riblets!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(The Shootfighter smacks Kong in the face with a muy thai kick)
Phil Blauer: You can hear his teeth rattling back here!!
Guillermo O'Bannon: James Fierce applies a rings of saturn to Bad Boy King Kong's arms!! All the abuse Kong's arms have been taking could pay off here! The Microshocker hobbles in to interfere again but The Shootfighter hits him with an angle slam!
James Fierce tags in The Shootfighter who applies an crippler crossface STF on Bad Boy King Kong. He pulls up on Kong's head & arm as James Fierce batters The Microshocker with european forearms
Guillermo O'Bannon: Bad Boy King Kong is nowhere near the ropes and The Shootfighter has the crossface locked in tight!
Phil Blauer: The fat man taps! The fat man taps! The fat man taps!
"Renegades of Funk" by Rage Against the Machine plays as the Palm Springs audience erupts
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "At 19 minutes 12 seconds; THE WINNERS OF THE MATCH, ADVANCING TO THE SECOND ROUND...THE K.G.B.!!!"
Guillermo O'Bannon: The first time teaming of James Fierce and The Shootfighter is successful! They go on to the second round to take on Praised or Persecuted. Speaking of the second round, this is how it's gonna go.
Andrew Sinclair & "The Saikyo Terrorist" Tatsuya Arakawa (Hardkore America)
vs.
The Un-Stable Andrew Karnage & Adrian Tanner Jr. (Hardkore America)
The Cupcake Crew Death Gojira & Tuxedo Mask (Hardkore America)
vs.
Rated X & Soutter (Hardkore America)
L.S.D. Lucifer Jones & "The Punisher" Dan Stein (Hardkore America)
vs.
Lonewolf McNeely & Robert Hunglestien III (Hardkore America)
Platinum Sensationalists "Platinum" Pat Bozzini & "The Sensational" Shawn Styles (GCW)
vs.
Legendary Fantastic Jester & The Fantastic One (USWF)
"The Mummy Commando" Genity Howard & Syberus (SWAT Australia)
vs.
Kilroy Evans & Sun (Hardkore America)
The Heart Throbs Rich Andrews & "Magnificent" Ron Lauren (Hardkore America)
vs.
The Devine Comedy Bob Lancelot & Dark Schnitzel (TKOW)
J.C. South and Captain Jonathan Jones (Independent)
vs.
Shingo & Masato (SWAT Rocky Mountains)
Praised or Persecuted Outrider & “The Infamous” Michael Hunter (GCW)
vs.
The KGB James Fierce & The Shootfighter (Hardkore America)
RPing will continue through this entire tournament. Second round will begin being posted tomorrow, so get those RPs in.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Ok fans, now it's time for the second round. These next elite eight teams will recieve a first round bye which will put the winner of this bracket at a distinct advantage over the winner of the next bracket. The first match is a match that has been the most talked about of the tournament. Andrew Sinclair, Adrian Tanner Jr., and Andrew Sinclair used to be in a stable...
Phil Blauer: Known as Triple A. Their babyface gimmick was to pick up stranded old ladies and help them change tires and get their doors open when they lock their keys inside. They turned heel by telling you such services weren't covered under your particular plan.
Guillermo O'Bannon: No, known as The Un-Stable. After Robert Hunglestien III left the group, Andrew Sinclair left as well.
Phil Blauer: Yes, he lost his zeal for life?
Guillermo O'Bannon: His zeal?
Phil Blauer: Yes, his zeal. His zest, his zip. With out Bobby Hunglow, Sinclair felt he couldn't leave up to the leader role. You see, Andy Sin and I are tight, like brothers. Or paisans. Amigos...
Guillermo O'Bannon: Get to the point, Phil. Jason the audio guy wants to play Arakawa's music.
Phil Blauer: He told me that the brief amount of time that Karnage, Kilroy, and Tanner looked to him as their leader, he wasn't his usual cheerful self.
Jason the audio guy gets tired of waiting and plays "Bomb Idea" by Mad Capsule Markets. The fans boo as Andrew Sinclair and "The Saikyo Terrorist" Tatsuya Arakawa walk out with Tom Lux
Guillermo O'Bannon: Andrew Sinclair & Tatsuya Arakawa are the #1 seeded team of this tournament, which is quite an accomplishment considering the 24 tandems of top wrestlers in this thing. But in order for that to mean anything, they have to get past two of the top tag team wrestlers in the World.
Yolanda Ando: Tatsuya Arakawa wears blood red biker MMA style tights with Japanese lettering for "Saikyo Terrorist" on the rear in black, high below the knee black boots, black TRACE kneepads, black wrist tape, and wears a "Tatsuya Arakawa - SAIKYO KENKA MICHI" t-shirt to the ring. The Hardkore Nippon Brass Knuckles title belt is strapped around his waist. Sinclair walks down to the ring wearing his wrestling trunks under a knee-length black and white Kobashi-style velvet robe. He also wears a black head band that trails down to his waist. Before entering the ring, he drops the robe and headband, revealing a long sleeve black t-shirt with the words "Straight Shooter" on the front and "Internationally Infamous" on the back in silver. He wears black bicycle-short-style wrestling trunks that have a stylized white revolver emblazoned across the ass.
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "The following second round tag team match scheduled for one fall and a 30 minute time limit. Your referee is Ron Reid. Featuring first representing Hardkore America; Accompanied to the ring by Tom Lux; First from Shimo-tsuga-gun, Tochigi, Japan; Standing 6 feet 4 inches tall; Weighing 264 pounds; He is The Current HARDKORE NIPPON BRASS KNUCKLES CHAMPION...'THE SAIKYO TERRORIST' TATSUYA ARAKAWA!! His partner is from Sacramento, California; Standing 6 feet 3 inches tall; Weighing 228 pounds...'THE STRAIGHT SHOOTER' ANDREW SINCLAIR!!
The fans boo. Andrew Sinclair drops his shirt and starts stretching on the ropes. "I'm the One" by Static-X plays and the fans erupt. Andrew Karnage steps through the curtain with Adrian Tanner Jr. and they slap the Palm Springs fans' hands on the way down to the ring. Adrian raises his arms, throws his head back, and thousands of multicolered streamers shoot simultaniously from all four corners of the ring. Adrian takes off his ring jacket and slides into the ring. In the ring, Adrian mounts the nearest turnbuckle, making the "gun" motion with left hand. He "cocks" and "fires," and then jumps down
Phil Blauer: Oh, almost got me. I'm kidding of course, I'm fine, fans.
Guillermo O'Bannon: These two are the top tag team wrestlers in the World teaming up. Could it be like Arn & Eaton?
Phil Blauer: Or Jannety & Stan Lane?
Guillermo O'Bannon: While both of these guys are known primarily for their tag team accomplishments, Andrew Karnage is a former Xtreme World Wrestling League Heavyweight Champion, Ultra Wrestling Confederacy World Champion, World Wrestling On-Line World Champion, IWA Deathmatch Champion, and IWA International Champion. Adrian Tanner Jr. is a former Ring Syndicate Australian Heavyweight Champion, Ring Syndicate Australian Statewide Champion, Unified SWAT Australian Statewide Champion, CWA Television Champion.
Yolanda Ando: Andrew Karnage wears black knee length basketball shorts with AK-47 down the outsides of each leg in dark red. Dark red kneepads, and black calf high boots with red laces, and has a black elbow supporter on his right elbow. The Hardkore World Six man Tag Team title belt is strapped around his waist. Adrian Tanner Jr. wears metallic blue shorts with "AT" in shiny red lettering on the sides. He holds the SWAT World Tag Team title belt over his right shoulder and his Hardkore World Six Man Tag Team title belt over his other.
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "Their opponents represent Hardkore America; Featuring first, from Orem, Utah; Standing 6 feet 5 inches tall; Weighing 263 pounds...ANDREW KARNAGE!! His partner is from Tucson, Arizona; Standing 6 feet 2 inches tall; Weighing 227 pounds; He is One Half of the SWAT World Tag Team Champions...ADRIAN TANNER JR.!! They are Two Thirds of the HARDKORE WORLD SIX MAN TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS...THE UN-STABLE!!
The fans cheer Tanner & Karnage. Ron Reid signals for the bell and Adrian Tanner Jr. & Andrew Sinclair leave the ring
Guillermo O'Bannon: Tatsuya Arakawa opens with a wild flurry of punches to Andrew Karnage's face, and the AK-47 backs into the corner. Arakawa lays into him with a series of vicious chops.
Karnage fires back with a few chops of his own and tosses Arakawa into the corner. He cracks Arakawa with a couple stiff vader forearm smashes that drops him into a sitting position
Guillermo O'Bannon: Andrew Karnage bootscrapes Arakawa's face a few times then twists into a facewash! He grabs Arakawa by the hair and headbutts the back of his head several times. Arakawa responds with a uraken spinning backhand. He tags in Andrew Sinclair.
Arakawa & Sinclair back Andrew Karnage into the corner and switch off with stiff kicks to Karnage's stomach. Andrew Sinclair tosses him across the ring with a karelin lift
Guillermo O'Bannon: Andrew Sinclair northern lights suplexes Andrew Karnage!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...(Andrew Karnage lifts his shoulder)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sinclair tosses Karnage over his shoulder with a rolling ipponzei judo throw. He lifts Karnage in a fireman's carry, but Karnage falls on his feet behind Sinclair. Sambo suplex by the AK-47!
The Palm Springs fans come alive! Andrew Karnage applies a masterlock to the back of Sinclair's neck and then starts spinning him round & round
Phil Blauer: I think I'm gonna be sick...
Guillermo O'Bannon: Andrew Karnage lets Andrew Sinclair drop to the mat! Karnage runs into the ropes, but Sinclair ducks underneath the Nightmare Lariot! German suplex by The Straight Shooter!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Andrew Karnage rolls his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Andrew Sinclair tags in Tatsuya Arakawa. Sinclair atomic drops Andrew Karnage on the top turnbuckle, and then pulls him upside down into a tree of woe. Arakawa & Sinclair get a running start and double baseball slide kick Karnage in the head!!
The audience reacts with an "OH!!!" and Karnage falls to the mat, his leg twitching slightly. Arakawa irish whips Andrew Karnage into the ropes and catches him in the chest with a yakuza kick
Guillermo O'Bannon: Arakawa front facelocks Karnage, but Karnage lifts him up into a fireman's carry. He runs into the center of the ring with a death valley driver!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Tatsuya Arakawa kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Andrew Karnage lifts Arakawa up in a chokeslam then drops him on his knee in a Choke-Breaker!!
Karnage goes over to his corner to tag in Adrian Tanner Jr., but Arakawa catches him by the foot and applies an ankle lock with a heel hold. Arakawa wrenches Karnage's foot to the side
Phil Blauer: Karnage was almost able to tag out. But like my last girlfriend told me "Close isn't gonna get me to leave my husband you limp dick loser."
Yolanda Ando: Ok, I was a little drunk.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Arakawa twists Karnage's ankle and tries to break it. Karnage rolls over on to his back, and kicks Arakawa off. He irish whips Arakawa into the ropes, and belly to belly suplexes him over his head!
Andrew Karnage tags in Adrian Tanner Jr. and Hardkore Hall explodes. Andrew Karnage atomic drops Arakawa on the top turnbuckle, facing the audience. Adrian Tanner Jr. climbs to the second turnbuckle behind Arakawa. Tanner backdrop superplexes Arakawa onto Karnage's knee
Guillermo O'Bannon: The double team manuever they call YOU DIE NOW!!
Phil Blauer: A great way for Karnage to blow out his knee.
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Tatsuya Arakawa kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Adrian Tanner Jr. armdrags Tatsuya Arakawa over into an armbar. He clamps down on Arakawa's bent elbow, trying to pull his shoulder out of it's socket.
Tanner sticks his knee into Arakawa's shoulder, pulling up on his arm. He turns it into a headlock on the mat. He grinds his forearm into Arakawa's temple. He presses Arakawa's shoulder to the mat
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Tatsuya Arakawa rolls him into a cradle)
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Adrian Tanner Jr. kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Tatsuya Arakawa snap mares Tanner over and tags him with two roundhouse kicks to his spine. He kneels behin him and applies a stretch plum! He pulls back on the head & arm of Adrian Tanner Jr., while the fans here in Hardkore Hall let him have it.
Adrian Tanner tries to rake Arakawa's eyes but he can't reach. Arakawa wrenches back on his head again just for trying. Arakawa rolls over top of him and applies a kneeling wakigatame. Arakawa yanks back on Tanner's extended arm, trying to tear his shoulder
Guillermo O'Bannon: Adrian Tanner Jr. trapped in that wakigatame armbar, reaching out towards the ropes. Tatsuya Arakawa pulls him back down into a jujigatame cross armbar. He rows back on Tanner's extended arm, trying to hyperextend his elbow.
Ron Reid asks Tanner if he wants to submit but he shakes his head no. Arakawa rows back on his arm one more time and then tags in Andrew Sinclair. They both grab an arm a piece and apply a double jujigatame armbar
Guillermo O'Bannon: Ron Reid lays in the count and makes Sinclair & Arakawa break it at five. Sinclair remains and hangs on to his jujigatame. He rows back on Adrian Tanner Jr.'s arm.
Tanner stomps his feet into the mat in pain. Sinclair sits up, smiles at Adrian and falls back again on his arm. Tanner gets to his feet, and so does Sinclair. He drops down into a fujiwara armbar on Adrian
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sinclair pulls up on Tanner's shoulder & exposed elbow. Tanner cries out in pain, as Sinclair tries to get him to tap out with the wakigatame! Tanner rolls forward and kicks Sinclair in the face. Tanner takes to the skies with a dropkick!
The fans cheer. Adrian Tanner Jr. front facelocks Sinclair and climbs up to the second turnbuckle. Tanner tornado DDTs Sinclair! He hooks Sinclair's leg
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Andrew Sinclair kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Adrian Tanner Jr. irish whips Sinclair into the ropes, but Sinclair comes back with a running boot to the face! He tags in Tatsuya Arakawa. They both lie out Adrian Tanner's arms out while he's on his stomach. Arakawa & Sinclair double kneedrop the backs of his elbows.
Tatsuya Arakawa grabs Tanner around the waist with a deadlift german suplex! Tanner is folded like an accordian, Tatsuya Arakawa pulls him up by the hair and hits him with a high kick to head
Guillermo O'Bannon: Arakawa slaps Tanner in the face with a left then another slap with his right hand. Tatsuya Arakawa tags him with a spinning chop, then he kicks him in the ribs. Arakawa bounces off the ropes and hits him with a yakuza kick!
Arakawa irish whips Tanner into the ropes, but he comes back with a flying body press
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Tatsuya Arakawa rolls him over)
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Adrian Tanner Jr. kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Arakawa gets to his feet, but Tanner trips him with a drop toe hold that pitches him throatfirst into the second rope! Arakawa staggers up and Adrian Tanner lifts him up into a brainbuster!
Andrew Karnage climbs to the second turnbuckle, and Adrian Tanner Jr. atomic drops Arakawa's legs onto Karnage's shoulders. Karnage jumps off with a black tiger bomb!! Adrian Tanner Jr. climbs to the top turnbuckle
Guillermo O'Bannon: Adrian Tanner Jr. flips off into a Wake Up Call 450 legdrop!!
Phil Blauer: Who flipped me off?
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Tatsuya Arakawa kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Andrew Karnage double underhooks his arms and lifts him up into a Tiger Buster!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Tatsuya Arakawa kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Andrew Karnage begs Arakawa to get up and when he does, Andrew Karnage drops him on his head with a wrist-clutch fisherman's buster!!
Karnage pulls him up into a waistlock, but Arakawa back elbows him. He tattoos him with a rolling solebutt kick! Tatsuya Arakawa climbs up to the second turnbuckle
Guillermo O'Bannon: "The Saikyo Terrorist" Tatsuya Arakawa kneedrops Karnage in the chest from the second rope!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Andrew Karnage kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Arakawa irish whips him into the ropes, but Karnage ducks under a clothesline. He hooks on a kataha-jime and drops Arakawa on his skull with a brainbuster!!
The audience erupts. Karnage tags in Adrian Tanner Jr. who climbs to the top turnbuckle. Andrew Karnage lifts Arakawa up in a powerbomb, but Tanner backflips into a moonsault reverse DDT off of Karnage's shoulders
Guillermo O'Bannon: Blind Man's Bluff!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...thr- (Andrew Sinclair stomps Tanner's back)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Adrian Tanner Jr. german suplexes Tatsuya Arakawa!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Tatsuya Arakawa gets his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Adrian Tanner goes for a huracanrana, but Arakawa reverses it and high angle MASSIVE powerbombs him!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Adrian Tanner Jr. kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Tatsuya Arakawa lifts Tanner up on his shoulders in a fireman's carry, but then drops his face on his shoulder with the Go 2 Sleep!!
Tanner rolls around the mat clutching his face. He gets up and tries to kick Arakawa, but he catches Tanner's boot. Tanner swings around with an enzuigiri kick! The fans cheer wildly, and he tags in Andrew Karnage
Guillermo O'Bannon: Karnage flips Arakawa over in a gory special and leans forward, Tanner hooks his head and hits a roll the dice neckbreaker as Karnage swings with Tatsuya and drops them with a swinging gory bomb!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Tatsuya Arakawa kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Andrew Karnage flips Arakawa over in an exploder '98! Karnage irish whips Arakawa into the ropes, but Arakawa comes back with a jumping knee attack right under his chin!
Hardkore Hall boos. Tatsuya Arakawa irish whips Karnage into the turnbuckles. He grabs Karnage's hair, then throws some high muay thai style kneelifts to the stomach, and ends the combo with a kneelift to jaw
Guillermo O'Bannon: Karnage comes out of the corner and grabs Arakawa around the neck and flips him over into a head & arm suplex!
The fans cheer. Arakawa stands up and ducks under a forearm, and backdrop drivers Karnage onto the back of his head! Arakawa tags in Andrew Sinclair. Arakawa hits Karnage with a left roundhouse kick to the face while Sinclair does a left roundhouse kick to the back of the head
Guillermo O'Bannon: Requiem for a CroCop!!
Phil Blauer: I miss the Bruno Nelson.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Andrew Sinclair lifts Karnage up into a fireman's carry and then drills him on the top of his head with a death valley driver!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Andrew Karnage kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sinclair waistlocks Karnage, but Karnage back elbows him. He scoops Sinclair up and swings him around into a catatonic backbreaker!
Andrew Karnage turns Sinclair over into a single leg boston crab! He yanks back on the leg, but stands on the back of Sinclair's head. Ron Reid checks in to see if he wants to tap out
Guillermo O'Bannon: Karnage leans as far back as he can with Sinclair's leg, then stomps the back of his head! Tatsuya Arakawa runs into the ring and blasts Karnage in the chest with a stiff kick! Sinclair staggers up to his feet, and wheelbarrow suplexes him!
The Palm Springs fans boo Sinclair as he climbs up to the top turnbuckle. Andrew Karnage springs to life and flips him over into an owendriver iconoclasm
Guillermo O'Bannon: Spinal Fusion Driver!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...thr-(Andrew Sinclair gets his foot on the bottom rope)
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "Twenty Minutes Have Elapsed. 10 Minutes Remaining."
Guillermo O'Bannon: Andrew Karnage tags in Adrian Tanner Jr., who climbs to the apron. Karnage flips Sinclair forward as Tanner hits him with a springboard missle dropkick!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Andrew Sinclair kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Adrian Tanner grabs Sinclair by the hair and tosses him over the ropes to the floor below! He slingshots himself onto the middle of the top rope and hits Sinclair in the face with a springboard senton!!
The crowd erupts in cheers. Adrian Tanner climbs back up onto the top turnbuckle, and flips off into a corkscrew 180 bodypress on Sinclair on the floor!! The Palm Springs fans chant "TAN-NER!! TAN-NER!! TAN-NER!! TAN-NER!! TAN-NER!!"
Guillermo O'Bannon: Adrian Tanner Jr. climbs up to the apron but is blindsided by a stiff shot from Tatsuya Arakawa. Arakawa DDTs him off the apron to the concrete below!!
The audience boos as Tanner lies there in a pool of his own blood. Tatsuya Arakawa helps Andrew Sinclair to his feet. Sinclair slams Tanner's spine into the guardrail with a uranage
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sinclair rolls Tanner back into the ring and climbs to the top turnbuckle! He flies off in a Bombs Away kneedrop but Tanner rolls out of the way!!
The crowd roars as Sinclair rolls around clutching his kneecap. Adrian Tanner Jr. capitalizes with a fisherman's suplex
Guillermo O'Bannon: The Sure Shot!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...thr- (Andrew Sinclair kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: A bloody Adrian Tanner Jr. tags in Andrew Karnage. Tanner smacks Sinclair upside the head with The Daytripper superkick and Karnage nails him in the back of the head with a Nightmare Lariot!! Nightmare Trip!
Phil Blauer: That's nothing like my 9 hour flight with the cast of Skating with Celebrities!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...thr- (Tatsuya Arakawa stomps Karnage's head)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Andrew Karnage lifts Sinclair up on his shoulders into a human torture rack, bending his spine across his massive shoulders. He drops down to his knees into a derailer! Karnage stands back up and racks Sinclair's back again.
Karnage bounces Sinclair's back across his shoulders for a while and then swings him around into a hangman's neckbreaker!! Karnage pulls him up for a suplex, but Sinclair blocks it with his calf
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sinclair reverses with a hanging vertical suplex and then drops his face on his knee, with the Go To (the) ER!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...thr- (Andrew Karnage kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Andrew Sinclair dragon suplexes Karnage!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Andrew Karnage rolls his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Karnage rolls out of the way of a falling headbutt. Karnage gut wrenches him up onto his shoulder and runs into the center of the ring with a ligerbomb!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Andrew Karnage claps his legs together on his head)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Karnage double underhooks Sinclair's arms, but Sinclair backdrops him. Sinclair scoops him up into a northern lights bomb!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Andrew Karnage gets his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Andrew Sinclair tags in Tatsuya Arakawa. Sinclair knees Karnage in the stomach, dropping him to all fours. Tatsuya runs off the ropes with a soccer kick to his face!
The audience lets out a collective "OH!!!" Tatsuya Arakawa pulls Karnage up by the hair and irish whips him into the ropes
Guillermo O'Bannon: Tatsuya Arakawa hits him with Aki Lariot!! He stares stoically at the camera afterwards...and doesn't notice Andrew Karnage no-selling it behind him!!
Karnage stands up and brushes himself off behind Tatsuya Arakawa while the audience roars. Arakawa notices the pop and turns around just in time to get his head taken off with a Nightmare Lariot!!! The crowd chants "KAR-NAGE!! KAR-NAGE!! KAR-NAGE!! KAR-NAGE!! KAR-NAGE!!" and Karnage rolls him over
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...thr- (Andrew Sinclair stomps his back)
"Wild" Bill Kasal: Twenty Five Minutes Have Elapsed. 5 Minutes Remaining."
Guillermo O'Bannon: Andrew Sinclair slams Karnage into the mat with an STO! Tatsuya Arakawa moves in for the kill with a rear naked choke!!
Hardkore Hall rocks with boos. Tatsuya Arakawa leans back on the choke, clamping his forearm against Karnage's throat
Guillermo O'Bannon: Adrian Tanner Jr. runs in and stomps Arakawa, breaking up the rear naked choke! Andrew Sinclair runs into the ring and knocks Tanner out of the ring with a running knee!
Tatsuya Arakawa lifts Karnage up into a fireman's carry, but Karnage slips onto his feet
Guillermo O'Bannon: Andrew Karnage irish whips Arakawa into the ropes and lays him out with Requiem for a Nightmare Lariat!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...3!!!
Ron Reid signals for the bell, and "I'm the One" by Static-X plays through Palm Springs Convention Center. The crowd roars as Karnage & Tanner raise their arms
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "At 26 minutes 26 seconds; THE WINNERS OF THE MATCH, ADVANCING TO THE THIRD ROUND...THE UN-STABLE!!!"
Guillermo O'Bannon: Andrew Karnage and Adrian Tanner Jr. show that familiarity doesn't always breed...Tatsuya Arakawa jumps Andrew Karnage from behind!
Audience boos and Andrew Sinclair lays out an exhausted Tanner with a uraken! Tatsuya Arakawa reapplies the rear naked choke and timekeeper Ron De La O rings the bell over & over
Guillermo O'Bannon: Tatsuya Arakawa not finished with the AK-47, not by a sight, but this match is over!
Phil Blauer: Don't they hear the bell ringing??
Guillermo O'Bannon: Karnage not moving anymore as Arakawa continues to strangle him with his forearm.
Hardkore Hall erupts as Kilroy Evans runs down to the ring with a trash can. Sinclair taps Arakawa on the shoulder, but Arakawa doesn't respond
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sinclair pulls Arakawa off of Karnage but not before getting slammed in the back with a trash can by Kilroy Evans!
The Palm Springs audience throws trash and debris at the departing Tatsuya Arakawa & Andrew Sinclair, as Kilroy Evans & Adrian Tanner Jr. demand medical attention for Andrew Karnage
Guillermo O'Bannon: Hello fans, both Hardkore and otherwise, and thank you for joining us for the third annual Frank A. Marano Memorial Cup. 24 of the World's top tag teams have converged for tonight's tournament. The 8 top seeded teams will recieve a first round bye, while the other 16 teams will battle it out to see who will face the winner of that bracket. Next to me is my mandatory partner, Phil Blauer.
Phil Blauer: I would like to welcome all the new fans who may not know me. I'm Phil Blauer, former TV anchor and four time Desert News Hawk award winner. I'm the peanut butter in this Reese Cup.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Does that make me the chocolate?
Phil Blauer: That makes you the 79 cents it cost.
“Some Might Say" by Oasis plays and the Palm Springs fans cheer. Syberus walks down to the ring followed by "The Mummy Commando" Genity Howard
Guillermo O'Bannon: Syberus making his return to the ring after suffering broken ribs at the hands of Soutter during his impromptu Hardkore West Coast title match at a Hardkore Rocky Mountains house show in Logan City, Utah. Genity Howard on quite a roll in SWAT Australia, winning their top singles title and being voted 2005's Wrestler of the Year.
Yolanda Ando: Genity Howard wears some loose clothing, cargo pants, a brandless, generic pair of white athletic shoes and an unbuttoned short-sleeve button up shirt with a depiction of Mega Man 3 on the back. He wears a metal face-mask akin to Vega from SF2. He has the SWAT Australia Championship belt strapped around his waist. Under the torso wrappings, you can faintly see a tattoo of the Venom Insignia. Syberus wears dark blue vinyl-look short tights with the yellow circle of stars representing the European Union on the front and back, black elbow and knee pads and black boots, with yellow hand/wrist tape to accent the yellow of the European stars.
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "Ladies and Gentleman, welcome to Palm Springs Convention Center. Hardkore Jonnie Valentine and Hardkore World presents the Frank A. Marano Jr. Memorial Cup! This first tag team match is scheduled for one fall and a 30 minute time limit. Your referee is Ron Reid. Featuring first, Representing SWAT Australia; from Parts Unknown; Standing 6 feet 3 inches tall; Weighing 195 pounds; He is The Current SWAT Australian Heavyweight Champion ...'THE MUMMY COMMANDO' GENITY HOWARD!!! His partner represents Hardkore America; from The Continent of Europe; Standing 6 feet tall; Weighing 228 pounds...SYBERUS!!!"
The Palm Springs fans chant "Wel-come Back! Wel-come Back! Wel-come Back! Wel-come Back! Wel-come Back!" Then "Caught in a Mosh" by Anthrax plays. Mr. 100 walks out and hands fans fake $100 bills with his picture on it. Blak Lung walks out next, sneering and the booing fans
Guillermo O'Bannon: Blak Lung also makes his return to the ring after quite a layoff. He interfered in the tag team title match between K.G.B. and L.S.D., stabbing Jones in the forehead with a rusty coat hanger. Mr. 100 also tried to make a 100 run-ins during that match, only one actually worked though.
Phil Blauer: Can't win for losing.
Guillermo O'Bannon: What the hell does that mean?
Phil Blauer: I have no idea. But maybe our fashion reporter Yolanda Ando knows!
Yolanda Ando: I don't know either, Phil. But Blak Lung wears army surplus jungle boots, green BDU pants, and a white tank top undershirt. His receeding hair line is covered by scar tissue. His black, nappy hair is long and unkept. He also has a patchy beard. Mr. 100 wears a bright neon green bodysuit with a mask covered in question marks.
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "Their opponents, Representing Hardkore America; featuring first from The Hundred Acre Wood; Standing 6 feet 4 inches tall; Weighing 240 pounds...MR. 100!!! His partner is from Accra in The Republic of Ghana; Standing 5 feet 11 inches tall; Weighing 245 pounds...BLAK LUNG!!!"
The crowd boos and jeers them. Ron Reid signals for the bell. Syberus and Blak Lung start out. Syberus rams his knee in Lung's stomach
Guillermo O'Bannon: Syberus whips Lung around with a corkscrew neckbreaker! He pulls Lung up by the fro, and irish whips Lung into the ropes. Syberus backdrops Blak Lung nearly into the ropes.
Blak Lung clutches the small of his back and scoots along the canvas. Syberus goes to pull him up by the front, but Blak Lung inside cradles him
Referee Ron Reid: 1...(Syberus kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Blak Lung scoops Syberus up but he falls behind him on his feet in an inverted facelock. Reverse DDT!
The audience applauds and Syberus tags in Genity Howard. They give Blak Lung a double dropkick; Genity going high & Syberus going low
Guillermo O'Bannon: "The Mummy Commando" Genity Howard full nelsons Blak Lung and drops back into a dragon suplex!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Blak Lung gets his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Genity Howard pulls Blak Lung up into a suplex and then drills him headfirst into a falcon arrow!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Blak Lung rolls his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Howard pulls Lung up but Blak Lung drives his knee up into Howard's stomach. Blak Lung drills Howard's head into the mat with a DDT!
Blak Lung front facelocks Genity Howard and runs up the turnbuckles into a tornado DDT, but Howard pushes him off to the mat! The fans pop
Guillermo O'Bannon: Genity Howard gets a running start and then cartwheels into a back elbow!
Phil Blauer: That mummy can move, baby!
Guillermo O'Bannon: The Mummy Commando lifts Blak Lung up into a hanging suplex and then drops him headfirst in a brainbuster!
The crowd cheers and Genity Howard tags in Syberus. They double suplex Blak Lung
Guillermo O'Bannon: Syberus double underhooks Blak Lung's arms, and flips him up and drops him in a tiger driver '91!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Blak Lung claps his legs together on Syberus' head)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Syberus irish whips Blak Lung into the ropes, and catches him with a perfectly executed dropkick!
Syberus bounces into the ropes but Mr. 100 sticks his knee out into Syberus' kidneys! Blak Lung sneaks up on him with an inverted facelock, and drops down into a reverse DDT onto his knee
Guillermo O'Bannon: Blak Lung brings his elbow down on Syberus' throat. He pumphandles Syberus up onto his shoulder and drops down into a tombstone!!
Blak Lung tags in Mr. 100. Blak Lung irish whips Syberus into the ropes, and Mr. 100 nearly takes his head off with a clothesline. The Palm Springs fans boo
Guillermo O'Bannon: Mr. 100 shoots him into the ropes and tiltawhirls him, but Syberus reverses with a crucifix cradle!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...(Mr. 100 gets his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Syberus irish whips Mr. 100 into the ropes and powerslams him!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...(Mr. 100 kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Syberus waits for Mr. 100 to get up, and then hits him with a spear! Syberus flips him over into a northern lights suplex!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Mr. 100 gets his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Syberus tags in Genity Howard. Howard irish whips Mr. 100 into the ropes, Syberus clotheslines him while Genity sweeps his legs out from under him!!
"The Mummy Commando" Genity Howard climbs to the top turnbuckle from inside the ring. He backflips into a moonsault splash
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Mr. 100 kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Genity Howard steps out on to the apron, and slingshots himself onto the middle of the top rope. He spins off with a springboard roundhouse kick!
That pops the jaded Palm Springs audience! Genity Howard irish whips Mr. 100 into the ropes, but the masked man comes back with a high cross body
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Genity Howard rolls it over into a pinning position)
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Mr. 100 kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Genity Howard rolls into a koppo kick! Genity Howard steps back out on the apron and comes off the middle of the top with a springboard diving DDT!!
The Palm Springs Convention Center roars. Genity Howard tags in Syberus. Howard fireman's carries Mr. 100 on his shoulders and walks him over to the corner. He sits Mr. 100 on the top turnbuckle, while Syberus climbs up to the second rope. Genity Howard joins his partner on the second turnbuckle and they double super fisherman's buster Mr. 100
Guillermo O'Bannon: "The OBLITERATIONATOR~!!! Version 2.0 Turbo with Lime... or else!"
Phil Blauer: What in the hell are you talking about?
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...3!!!
The fans cheer as "Game Over" from Mega Man 3 plays. Ron Reid raises Syberus & Genity Howard's arm
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "At 9 minutes 25 seconds; THE WINNERS OF THE MATCH, ADVANCING TO THE SECOND ROUND, 'THE MUMMY COMMANDO' GENITY HOWARD & SYBERUS!!!"
Guillermo O'Bannon: Syberus & Genity Howard score the first win in tonight's tournament! They go on to the second round to face the winner of Kilroy Evans & Sun vs. Sly Fondell & Dracon Xanathos!
Editor's Note: In Hardkore World and during this tournament, the way it works is I will post one match a day and people will continue to RP throughout the show. Your RPs will count towards your match, and if your match has already past, it will count towards the next round. Please post your RPs as parts of the continuing show.
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Feb 27, 2006#2
Guillermo O'Bannon: Next up is a match between two first time teams. Sly Fondell teams up with SWAT Australia President Dracon Xanathos to take on Hardkore America Heavyweight Champion Kilroy Evans & Sun. The winner will take on Syberus & SWAT Australian Heavyweight Champion "The Mummy Commando" Genity Howard
Phil Blauer: Sly Fondell's name sounds like a cartoon character. He's a cat that loves the ladies. Cedric the Entertainer would do the voice. Oooh, better yet, somebody doing Cedric would do the voice.
former prowrestling.com internet reporter Matt Boone: Malcolm Jamal Warner's available.
“Princes of the Universe” by Queen hits. Four beautiful women (a brunette, an ebony, a red head and a Latina) come out, all dressed in designer Armani dresses. The first two are carrying golden bowls full of rose petals that they scatter down the ramp. The other two are also holding golden bowls, only these contain pin badges with Sly and Dracon on them that say “XXX”. They throw these badges to the crowd; especially the pretty ladies! As the girls reach the ring Dracon and Sly, accompanied by Ayame and Jada (who both look even more beautiful than the girls at ringside) walk through the curtain. Pyro's of red and gold blast impressively from the sides of the rampway as red and gold lights shine on the gorgeous foursome. Sly struts arrogantly down the ramp opening his golden robe and flashing his chiseled body to the crowd while Dracon stretches his neck moving his head to the sides and cockily smiles for the cute female fans (no smile or attention for the ugly ones!). The Brunette and the Redhead have scattered more petals inside the ring and open the ropes to help Dracon and Sly in. Jada takes off Sly's robe and caresses his body as Sly grins his trademark arrogant smirk and poses with a double bicep flex, while Dracon pulls Ayame close to him and slowly seductively wet kisses her
Guillermo O'Bannon: That kiss sure is seductive.
Phil Blauer: And wet! Just like me.
Guillermo O'Bannon: These two are season veterans in the Land Down Under. Fondell is a former SWAT Australia Champion, defeating Adrian Tanner Jr. for the belt after a year long feud. They just had a brutal barbed wire fire cage match at New Year's Nightmare that Tanner won. Xanathos has some history in our fair state, as a former Golden State Champion with Rockin Rick Owens' SCW, as well as a former MCW United States Champion.
Phil Blauer: I never noticed this before, but we get a lot of people from SWAT for these tourn-a-thingies. I wonder why that is.
Yolanda Ando: Sly Fondell wears a custom made Armani blue pastel coloured trunks with 'Fondell ' written on the butt in fancy gold writing, blue pastel boots with "SF" on the side in gold, pastel blue kneepads and golden taped wrists. Sly wears a custom Armani made golden robe to the ring, on the back of the robe written in real gold flake is 'The Model of male perfection'.
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "The following tag team match is scheduled for one fall and a 30 minute time limit. Your referee is Mike Peters. Featuring first, representing SWAT Australia. From Atlantic City, New Jersey; Standing 6 feet 5 inches tall; Weighing 298 pounds...SLY FONDELL!!! From Parts Unknown; Standing 6 feet 4 inches tall; Weighing 250 pounds...KJ 'DRACON' XANATHOS!!!"
The Palm Springs fans boo. "Frontier Psychiatrist" by The Avalanches
plays and Hardkore Hall erupts. Kilroy Evans and Sun walk out and are nearly blown back by the applause
Guillermo O'Bannon: Alot of fans were disappointed that Kilroy Evans didn't team up with his usual partner, Andrew Karnage. Kilroy Evans and Sun want to make everyone here in Palm Springs forget about The Miracle Violence Combination II, at least for just one night.
Phil Blauer: Who?
Yolanda Ando: Wouldn't these guys be known as MVC III? Kilroy Evans wears a black NESkimoes t-shirt, blue jeans, sneakers, and red, white, & blue wristbands. Sun wears a bright yellow martial arts gi and a “vega” style mask. The mask is white with a red dot in the center mimicking the Japanese Flag. He wears two Shuko Ninja Claws on each hands and carries a bag of Martial Arts weapons.
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "Their opponents represent Hardkore America; Featuring first from Attbury, South Carolina; Standing 5 feet 11 inches tall; Weighing 250 pounds; He is One Third HARDKORE WORLD SIX MAN TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS & The Current HARDKORE AMERICA HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION...KILROY EVANS!!!"
The crowd erupts with cheers. Kilroy Evans stands on the second turnbuckle waving at the fans. Mike Peters signals for the bell. Sun and Sly Fondell start out
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sun & Fondell lock up, and Fondell takes him over with a fireman's carry. Fondell irish whips him into the ropes, but Sun comes back with a flying head scissors!
Hardkore Hall cheers. Sun applies an armbar. He sticks his knee into the ball of Fondell's shoulder. He then wraps his legs around Fondell's arm with a leg scissors
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sun rows back with Fondell's arm. Sun pulls him up for an abdominal stretch, but before he can cinch it in, Fondell hiptosses him. Fondell picks him up into a waistlock, but Sun back elbows him. He does a go behind and applies a chicken wing to that same arm.
Sun tags in Kilroy Evans. Kilroy Evans takes Fondell's leg out with a legsweep while Sun comes off the ropes with a spinning heel kick to Sly's face
Guillermo O'Bannon: High and Lois!! Looks like somebody came up with that name on the shitter. I'm going with Emily, then she shouted it to Kilroy on the other side of the trailer.
Phil Blauer: A move named after a comic nobody reads. Was "Mary Worth" taken?
Referee Mike Peters: 1...(Sly Fondell kicks out)
former prowrestling.com reporter Matt Boone: Sources close to the situation say they're making a Hi and Lois movie. Steve Martin plays Hi, Bonnie Hunt plays Lois, John Goodman plays the fat neighbor, and the kids are computer generated. The director feels their "cuteness" is key to the film's sucess.
Phil Blauer: Kilroy should play Hagar the Horrible.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Kilroy Evans twists Sly around in a swinging neckbreaker! He pulls Fondell up by the hair and irish whips him into the turnbuckles. He follows him in with a hard avalanche!
Phil Blauer: I think the ring just moved an inch! No, that's just me.
Yolanda Ando: Gross.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Kilroy Evans scoops Fondell up, but Fondell lands on his feet behind him in an inverted facelock. Fondell drives him into the mat with a reverse DDT!
The Palm Springs fans boo. Sly Fondell snap suplexes Kilroy Evans. He backs Evans into the corner with a series of sharp knife edge chops and then tags in Dracon Xanathos
Guillermo O'Bannon: Fondell irish whips Kilroy Evans into the ropes and takes him down with a drop toe hold while Xanathos dropkicks him in the face! Dracon Xanathos pulls Kilroy up by the arm, and twists it.
Dracon Xanathos drags Kilroy into the center of the ring by his twisted arm, and then back hook kicks him! He pulls Kilroy up into a front facelock
Guillermo O'Bannon: Kilroy Evans reverses with a spinebuster! He pulls Dracon Xanathos up and then drills his head into the mat with a DDT!
Kilroy Evans runs into the ropes and baseball slide kicks Xanathos in the side of the head! Hardkore Hall roars, and Kilroy Evans traps one of Xanathos' arms. But Dracon hiptosses him over
Guillermo O'Bannon: Dracon Xanathos runs at Kilroy and takes him down with a crucifix cradle!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...(Kilroy Evans gets his arm loose)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Xanathos tags Sly Fondell in, and then climbs to the top turnbuckle. Sly Fondell lifts Kilroy Evans up on his shoulders in a human torture rack. Dracon Xanathos comes off the top with a leg drop to Kilroy Evans' neck!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Kilroy Evans kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sly Fondell hammerlocks Evans' arm behind him and then drops him in a belly to belly suplex on his chicken winged arm!
Phil Blauer: This guy's a powerhouse!
Palm Springs fans boo. Sly Fondell applies a chicken wing crossface. He clamps down on Kilroy's windpipe, while wrenching up on his bent elbow. Mike Peters asks Evans if he wants to submit but The Attbury Assassin refuses
Guillermo O'Bannon: Kilroy fights his way up to his feet, but Fondell continues to pull up on his arm. Evans mule kicks him in the groin! He drives Fondell's face into the mat with an inverted russian leg sweep!
Hardkore Hall comes to life! Kilroy Evans full nelsons Sly Fondell, and dragon suplexes him
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Sly Fondell gets his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Kilroy Evans atomic drops Fondell on the top turnbuckle facing the audience. He pulls Fondell down into a tree of woe and then backs into the other corner. Kilroy Evans spears an upside down Sly!
The fans cheer and Kilroy Evans tags Sun back into the ring. Sun climbs to the top turnbuckle while Kilroy pulls Sly's head into his legs. Kilroy Evans picks Fondell up in a powerbomb while Sun comes down with a leg drop across Fondell's neck
Guillermo O'Bannon: Dain Bramage!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Sly Fondell kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sun irish whips Fondell into the ropes and lifts up into a flapjack! Sun runs into the ropes and comes down across the back of Fondell's head with an axe kick!
The audience cheers. Sun climbs to the top turnbuckle and backflips into a moonsault but Fondell rolls out of the way!! Fondell picks him up into a textbook suplex
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sly Fondell presses Sun over his head and lifts him up & down three times before slamming him hard to the mat! He twists Sun's legs up and turns him over into a texas cloverleaf!
Fondell rocks back on Sun's spine, bending him in half. Sun tries to crawl over to the ropes, but Fondell holds him there. Fondell reaches out and tags in Dracon Xanathos
Guillermo O'Bannon: Dracon Xanathos moves in and applies an armbar while Sun's still locked in Sly Fondell's texas cloverleaf! Mike Peters giving them the five count but these guys aren't breaking.
Kilroy Evans runs in and cracks Fondell in the face with a hard kick to the face to break the cloverleaf! Kilroy drops an elbow on the back of Dracon Xanathos' head to break the armbar
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sun spins around and tags Xanathos in the face with a hard punch. Sly Fondell attempts to interfere, but Sun monkey flips him back into his corner!
The crowd cheers. Sun turns around into an STO from Dracon Xanathos, and the boos return. Xanathos pulls Sun up by the hair, and stands him up with a european forearm
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sun responds with a roundhouse kick! He tags in Kilroy Evans and climbs to the top turnbuckle from inside the ring. Evans shoots Xanathos into the ropes and spinebusters him hard into the mat! Sun backflips into a moonsault splash!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Dracon Xanathos kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Kilroy Evans applies a sleeper on Xanathos on the mat. He's got the forearm underneath Xanathos' chin, wearing the SWAT President down. Xanathos fights his way to his feet and backs Kilroy Evans in the corner. Xanathos stands on the second turnbuckle and inverted facelocks him. He jumps off with a tornado reverse DDT!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Kilroy Evans gets his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Dracon Xanathos goes for a suplex, but Kilroy blocks it. Kilroy reverses with a brainbuster!
Kilroy Evans goes for a piledriver, but Dracon Xanathos backdrops out of it! Xanathos drops Kilroy Evans with a side effect
Guillermo O'Bannon: Dracon Xanathos lifts Kilroy Evans in a release back suplex! He tags in Sly Fondell and sits Kilroy Evans on the top turnbuckle. Sly & Dracon climb to the second turnbuckle and give Evans a double brainbuster superplex!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Kilroy Evans kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sly Fondell scoops Kilroy up into a northern lights bomb!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Sun stomps the back of Fondell's head)
Guillermo O'Bannon: The former SWAT Australia Champion irish whips Kilroy Evans into the ropes and flips him over his head with a belly to belly suplex!
The Palm Springs crowd boos. Fondell double underhooks Kilroy's arms and he back body drops him. He hits a stunner on Fondell and catches his legs on the way up, then turns him over into a boston crab
Guillermo O'Bannon: Kilroy Evans rocks back on Fondell's legs, planting his feet. Fondell crawls over to the ropes and reaches out, but Kilroy drags him back into the center of the ring and reapplies the boston crab! Fondell refusing to submit, so Kilroy Evans pulls him up into a double underhook, then drills his head into the canvas with a DDT!!
Kilroy Evans tags in Sun, and lifts Sly Fondell up in an electric chair while Sun climbs to the top turnbuckle. Sun takes Fondell off Kilroy's shoulders with a spear
Guillermo O'Bannon: The Fear Of God, Part Deaux!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Sly Fondell kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sun bounces into the ropes and drops a leg across Sly Fondell's face. He climbs to the top turnbuckle and backflips into a shooting star press!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Sly Fondell kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sun handsprings into a bodypress but the big man catches him and powerslams him! Sly Fondell pulls Sun's head into his legs and pulls him up into The Fondell Bomb!!
The crowd jeers and boos Sly Fondell. He front facelocks Sun and cradles his leg. He drives his head into the mat with a cradle dangerous DDT
Guillermo O'Bannon: The Last Kiss Goodnite!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...thr- (Kilroy Evans stomps Fondell's head)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Mike Peters shoos Kilroy Evans back to his corner while Fondell butterflies Sun's arms. He lifts him up into a spinning tigerdriver he calls The Prom Night Promise!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...thr- (Sun claps his legs together on Fondell's head)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Fondell tags in Dracon Xanathos. Xanathos climbs up to the top turnbuckle. Fondell back suplexes Sun and Xanathos backflips into a moonsault!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Sun kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Dracon Xanathos climbs to the top again and comes off the top with a clothesline!! Xanathos irish whips Sun into the ropes, but Sun comes back with a flying headscissors takedown!
The crowd comes to life! Sun climbs to the top turnbuckle and rolls over Xanathos with a sunset flip
Guillermo O'Bannon: Setting Sun!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...thr- (Sly Fondell stomps the back of Sun's head)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sun gets up to deal with Fondell but Dracon Xanathos sneaks up on him with a russian legsweep!
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "Twenty Minutes Have Elapsed. 10 Minutes Remaining."
Guillermo O'Bannon: Dracon Xanathos lifts Sun up into a fireman's carry and then spins him around into a TKO! Samurai Cutter!!
The fans boo and Dracon Xanathos tags in Sly Fondell. Dracon Xanathos inverted facelocks Sun and spins him around into a test drive! Sly Fondell applies a cobra clutch bodyvice
Guillermo O'Bannon: The Check Mate into The Dream Lover. Kilroy Evans enters the ring and stomps Sly Fondell, breaking up The Dream Lover. Sly Fondell gets to his feet and catches The Bad Touch diamond cutter by Kilroy Evans!!
Sun pulls Sly Fondell up into a crucifix powerbomb then drops him on the back of his head!! Sun cradles his legs for the pin; Dracon Xanathos steps into the ring but Kilroy Evans spears him
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...3!!!
The bell rings and the Palm Springs cheer. "Frontier Psychiatrist" by The Avalanches hits. Dracon Xanathos slaps Fondell on the back and he releases The Dream Lover
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "At 21 minutes 24 seconds; THE WINNERS OF THE MATCH, ADVANCING TO THE SECOND ROUND...KILROY EVANS & SUN!!!"
Guillermo O'Bannon: Kilroy Evans & Sun advance to the second round to face Syberus & SWAT Australian Champion "The Mummy Commando" Genity Howard!
"Magnificent" Ron Lauren & "Heart Throb" Rich Andrews walk down to the ring with no music. Hardkore World Women's Champion "Sexy" Anjanette Turner walking behind them
Guillermo O'Bannon: Welcome back fans, up next is our match between four battle tested veterans. Ron Lauren & Rich Andrews are former Hardkore America Tag Team Champions, returning to the ring for this tournament after over a five year layoff. They are one of the few wrestlers in this tournament that were the last Frank A. Marano Cup.
Phil Blauer: No music, eh. Kinda pretencious, wouldn't you say? I bet they have heat with the boys in the back. Boone?
former prowrestling.com internet reporter Matt Boone: On it.
Yolanda Ando: "Magnificent" Ron Lauren wears black trunks with matching boots and wrist bands. "Heart Throb" Rich Andrews wears a red trunks with the words “Heart Throb” written on the back of them. Also has matching red boots.
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "The following first round tag team match is scheduled for one fall. Your referee is Ron Reid. Featuring first, accompanied to the ring by 'Sexy' Anjanette Turner; First, from New York City; Standing 6 feet 1 inch tall; Weighing 285 pounds...'MAGNIFICENT' RON LAUREN!! His partner is from Phoenix, Arizona; Standing 5 feet 8 inches tall; Weighing 230 pounds...'HEART THROB' RICH ANDREWS!!"
The Palm Springs fans cheer the familiar team. "No Quarter" by Led Zeppelin plays and the crowd quickly turns ugly. Johnny Lee Harley steps out first with a branding iron, swinging a lariot over his head. Out walks Cobryn next and is nearly blown back by the jeers
Guillermo O'Bannon: Cobryn making his return after taking some time off after losing his Hardkore World Heavyweight Championship to Andrew Sinclair in Sacramento. He's reportedly been suffering from a deep depression, only surfacing to work pre-arranged dates over in Australia for SWAT.
Phil Blauer: Yeah, look at the sadness in his eyes. It's Billy Jack Haynes-esque.
Guillermo O'Bannon: No it isn't...my god, your right. That man carried such a burden.
Phil Blauer: Just put a silly hat on him and put Florida on his trunks, and it's him. Doesn't seem like a Cobryn type return. Where's his Lucifer Jones' mask?
Guillermo O'Bannon: These guys have teamed before, as former Hardkore World Six Man Tag Team Champions, as well as their recent match in Joetsu, Japan against The New Original Axis of Evil for the Hardkore Nippon Tag Team Championship!
Yolanda Ando: Johnny Lee Harley wears green trunks and a large brown cowboy hat with the Hardkore Nippon Grand Championship around his waist. Cobryn is dressed in a black silk robe that trails behind him a good four feet. He wears regular black tights and has tanned skin. He also wears black wrestling boots.
former prowrestling.com internet reporter Matt Boone: These guys recently lost the Hardkore Nippon Tag Team Titles to The New Original Axis of Evil.
Phil Blauer: What fed?
former prowrestling.com internet reporter Matt Boone: JoJo Sushi presents: Hardkore Nippon. It's located just south of this message board if anybody's interested.
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "Their opponents, representing Hardkore Nippon; Featuring first, from Sweetwater, Texas; Standing 6 feet 3 inches tall; Weighing 312 pounds; He is The Current HARDKORE NIPPON GRAND CHAMPION...JOHNNY LEE HARLEY!! His partner is from Key Largo of the Florida Keys; Standing 6 feet 4 inches tall; Weighing 250 pounds...COBRYN!!!"
The Palm Springs Convention Center boos. Rich Andrews and Johnny Lee Harley start off. Harley lands a hard kick to Andrews' gut
Guillermo O'Bannon: Harley lands a stiff punch to Andrews' chin. He shoots Rich Andrews into the ropes, but The Heart Throb slides underneath a big boot. He comes up behind Harley and chicken wing crossface suplexes him!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...(Johnny Lee Harley rolls his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Rich Andrews belly to belly suplexes Harley over his shoulder and then catches him with a rude awakening on the way down!
Rich Andrews applies an inverted facelock and climbs to the second turnbuckle. But Johnny Lee Harley flips him forward into a powerslam
Guillermo O'Bannon: Johnny Lee Harley applies a bearhug. He squeezes Rich Andrews' lower back, then runs him into the corner. He doesn't give Andrews a clean break and instead goes to work with punches to his stomach. He tags in Cobryn.
Cobryn bashes Andrews in the corner with a pointed elbow smashes. Rich Andrews ducks one and responds with a tiger suplex
Referee Ron Reid: 1...(Cobryn gets his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: "The Heart Throb" Rich Andrews wrenches Cobryn's neck with a swinging neckbreaker.
The audience applauds. Andrews tries to turn Cobryn over in a boston crab, but Cobryn rakes Rich's eyes. Cobryn crawls over and tags Johnny Lee Harley back in
Guillermo O'Bannon: Johnny Lee Harley lifts Rich Andrews up into a hanging brainbuster!!
Phil Blauer: Let him think about it a little while there.
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Rich Andrews kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Johnny Lee Harley hiptosses Rich Andrews over into a powerslam!
Harley double underhooks Andrew but the Heart Throb backdrops him. Andrews turns him over into a single leg boston crab. He pulls back on Harley's leg as Ron Reid checks in to see if he taps out
Guillermo O'Bannon: Rich Andrews stands on the back of Johnny Lee Harley's head while applying that single leg boston crab. He turns it into an inverted indian deathlock. Andrews drops back on Harley's twisted legs.
Harley growls in pain, tosses the back of his head into the mat. Andrews gets back to his feet and drops back again on his legs. Harley reaches out and grabs the ropes
Guillermo O'Bannon: Rich Andrews waistlocks Johnny Lee Harley and spins him around & round, into a german suplex! He pulls him up into a second german suplex!
Rich Andrews tags in "Magnificent" Ron Lauren. They both climb to the top turnbuckle then fly off with a double fistdrop
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Johnny Lee Harley kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: The powerman of the group, Ron Lauren vertical suplexes Harley up into a falcon arrow!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Johnny Lee Harley gets his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Ron Lauren goes for a fameasser, but Johnny Lee Harley reverses it into a powerbomb!!
The Palm Springs Convention Center boos. Johnny Lee Harley shows off his power with a one armed bodyslam. He shoots Lauren into the ropes
Guillermo O'Bannon: Johnny Lee Harley flying back elbows Lauren! He pulls Lauren up in a half nelson, but Ron back elbows him in the side of the head. Lauren double underhooks Harley's arms and runs into the center of the ring with a michinoku driver I!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Cobryn stomps Lauren's back)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Ron Lauren tags in Rich Andrews. Ron Lauren bearhugs Johnny Lee Harley and pulls him down across his thighs. Rich Andrews comes off the top rope with a leg drop!!
Phil Blauer: Vegamatic...and/or Death Sentence...and whatever The Dicks call that move!
former prowrestling.com internet reporter Matt Boone: The Tug Job, HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Johnny Lee Harley kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: "Heart Throb" Rich Andrews scoops Harley up and then drops him down in a fisherman's suplex!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Johnny Lee Harley gets his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Rich Andrews climbs to the top turnbuckle, and then catches Johnny Lee Harley with a huracanrana!! He cradles the leg!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Johnny Lee Harley kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Andrews runs into the ropes but Johnny Lee Harley catches him with a tiltawhirl piledriver!!
Hardkore Hall boos Harley as he catches his breath. He flips Rich Andrews over his shoulder and then back again with a dominator!! The boos get louder as Harley rolls Andrews over and pins him
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Rich Andrews kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Johnny Lee Harley drives Rich Andrews' head into the mat with a double underhook DDT!! He tags in Cobryn. Cobryn lifts Andrews over his shoulder into a gory special, then drops to his knees in a facefirst slam!!
The Palm Springs fans boo and chant "FUCK YOU COBRYN *clap* *clap* *clap-clap-clap* FUCK YOU COBRYN *clap* *clap* *clap-clap-clap* FUCK YOU COBRYN *clap* *clap* *clap-clap-clap* FUCK YOU COBRYN *clap* *clap* *clap-clap-clap* FUCK YOU COBRYN *clap* *clap* *clap-clap-clap*" He sneers back at them and kicks the bottom rope at them
Guillermo O'Bannon: Cobryn straightjackets Rich Andrews' arms in front of him then drops back into a rising star suplex!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Rich Andrews gets his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Cobryn runs into the ropes and catches Andrews in the side of the head with a running double kneelift! He lifts Andrews up in an electric chair but Heart Throb spins around on his shoulders into a huracanrana!
The fans come to life. Rich Andrews climbs to the top turnbuckle and spins off into a spiral tap senton!! The Palm Springs crowd erupts
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Rich Andrews kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Andrews inverted facelocks Cobryn, but Cobryn reaches up and scratches his eyes. Cobryn presses Andrews over his head and then drops him into a Fuck You stunner!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...thr- (Rich Andrews kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Cobryn tags Johnny Lee Harley back in. Johnny Lee Harley bites into Rich Andrews' forehead!
Phil Blauer: Not the face!
Guillermo O'Bannon: "Magnificent" Ron Lauren has the same idea and rains down on Harley's head with forearms. Ron Reid shoos him back into the corner, but Rich Andrews takes the advantage to hit Johnny Lee Harley in the chest with his spinning heart punch he calls The Heart Throb!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...thr- (Cobryn stomps the back of Rich Andrews' head)
Guillermo O'Bannon: "Heart Throb" Rich Andrews applies a kataha-jime and spins Johnny Lee Harley around the ring! Harley finds his feet and pushes himself into Andrews in the corner. Johnny Lee Harley drops Andrews on his head with a t-bone suplex!
The fans boo. Johnny Lee Harley lifts Andrews up in a human torture rack but Andrews lands on his feet behind him. He grabs Harley by the head in a 3/4 nelson
Guillermo O'Bannon: Rich Andrews runs up the turnbuckles into an acid drop!! He tags in "Magnificent" Ron Lauren, and they both climb to the top turnbuckle. Rich Andrews and Ron Lauren both leap off with a double dropkick!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...3!!!
The fans cheer wildly, and "Sexy" Anjanette Turner comes into the ring and raises both Lauren & Andrews' arms in victory
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "At 12 minutes 47 seconds; THE WINNERS OF THE MATCH, ADVANCING TO THE SECOND ROUND...'MAGNIFICENT' RON LAUREN & 'THE HEART THROB' RICH ANDREWS!!!"
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sexy Anj is on a roll! She won the Hardkore World Women's Championship and her team advances to the second round. They will face the winner of The Potentials vs. The Devine Comedy.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Coming up next is a match between Stan "The Icon" Wilson's new tag team of P.J. Wright & Casey Sanchez taking on TKOW's Dark Schnitzel and Bob Lancelot. The winner of this match will go on to face "Magnificent" Ron Lauren & "Heart Throb" Rich Andrews in the next round.
(Boone passes Phil a note.)
Phil Blauer: (reading) There's been some great tag team names throughout Hardkore's illustrious history: Rad Thunder, Shadows of the Night, ...Mike Powers and Chang Kahn. But nothing's come close to The Potentials versus The Divine Comedy.
Guillermo O'Bannon: What about Lobster Boy & Professor Mittens?
former prowrestling.com internet reporter Matt Boone: Who was that?
Guillermo O'Bannon: It's my cat & me...I'm so lonely.
As the rythmatic bass of "Gasolina" by Daddy Yankee begins to blare throughout the arena, out walks "The Icon" Stan Wilson wearing his cocky grin from ear to ear, then followed by the "M.C. Phenom" who immediately strikes a stateous pose for the crowd as his brother steps aside. God's Talent" P. J. Wright begins his arrogant strut down to the ring. With his mentor motivating him every step of the way, P. J. slides into the ring and pumps his fist in the air as he poses on the middle rope. As both men make their way down the aisle with Stan leading the way, Casey continues to pose for the crowd before stepping unto the outiside ring apron and climbing the second turnbuckle before once again striking a statuous pose for the crowd, while Stan simaltaneously plays to them and motivates his brother with words of encouragment
Guillermo O'Bannon: Casey Sanchez has wrestled in a Hardkore ring before.
Phil Blauer: You mean the time he got his neck broken by The Miracle Violence Combination II?
Guillermo O'Bannon: Yes, I mean the time he got his neck broken by The Miracle Violence Combination II. This is my first look at PJ Wright.
Phil Blauer: What do you think?
Guillermo O'Bannon: He likes to pump his fist. He's also a former UWA Cruiserweight Champion. But anyone trained by former Hardkore America Heavyweight Champion & SWAT World Heavyweight Champion has about as good a chance to succeed as anyone.
Phil Blauer: Is Casey Sanchez related to Tammy? They're both inexplicably Mexican.
Guillermo O'Bannon: No, but they were married once a few years back. It didn't last long.
Phil Blauer: ...so which one's Mexican, the black guy or the german?
Yolanda Ando: Casey Sanchez wears purple trunks with the word "Phenom" embroidered in black on the backside with gold trim, white wrist tape, black knee pads, and white calf length boots. PJ Wright wears purple trunks with his initials, "P. J." embroidered in black with gold trim on the backside, black arm pads, white hand and wrist tape, black knee pads, and knee length black leather boots.
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "The following first round tag team match is scheduled for one fall with a 30 minute time limit. Your referee is Mike Peters. Featuring first, accompanied to the ring by their manager, Stan "The Icon" Wilson; from Atlanta, Georgia; Standing 5 feet 11 inches tall; Weighing 220 pounds...'GOD'S TALENT' P.J. WRIGHT!! His partner is from Mexico City, Mexico; Standing 6 feet 4 inches tall; Weighing 250 pounds...'THE M.C. PHENOM' CASEY SANCHEZ!! They are THE POTENTIALS!!!"
Phil Blauer: Hmmm...The Potentials. You'd think they could aim higher. I'm not saying call yourself The Fantastics, but hows about The Short-Term Goal Acheivers.
The audience cheers the popular duo. The lights go off at Palm Springs Convention Center and the "All My Life" by Foo Fighters starts. Bob Lancelot and Dark Schnitzel sprint down to the ring to a mixed reaction of cheers & boos from the Palm Springs crowd. Lancelot slides into the ring under the bottom rope and hops up onto the turnbuckle and points at the crowd, he then hops off of the turnbuckle
Guillermo O'Bannon: This is also my first look at The Devine Comedy, but Bob Lancelot is currently undefeated in TKOW.
Phil Blauer: I think that's super. It won't last though, Matt Griffin won't lose forever.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Dark Schnitzel is huge at seven feet tall. I'll bet Casey Sanchez wishes he had his brother Stan Wilson as his partner instead of PJ Wright at least for this match.
Phil Blauer: Get out of his head, O'Bannon!
Yolanda Ando: All of Dark Schnitzel clothes are camoflouge colored. A phantom-like mask that covers upper part of his face, red Hawk-like tattoo covering the left part of face. Open jacket, long gloves, big spear with little spears coming out from the sides tattoo covering the back and the sleeves of his jacket. Big steel chain on his waist, long pants, long boots, same spear tattoo on the sides of his pants. Bob Lancelot has no shirt on with black with orange lightning pants.
Phil Blauer: He has a tattoo on his face? Ladies, he's gotta be single.
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "And their opponents represent TKOW; first hailing from Oxford, England; Standing 5 feet 10 inches tall; Weighing 230 pounds...BOB LANCELOT!!! His partner is from Perplexia; Standing an amazing 7 feet tall; Weighing 320 pounds...DARK SCHNITZEL!!! They are THE DEVINE COMEDY!!!"
The crowd boos Schnitzel & Lancelot as they recieve their final instructions from Mike Peters
Guillermo O'Bannon: Where's Perplexia?
Phil Blauer: Down the interstate from Dyslexia. But keep going and take the exit called Anorexia. The chicks are alot hotter. Dark Schnitzel has a tattoo on his face? Ladies, he's single.
Guillermo O'Bannon: ...Phil, you just said that.
Phil Blauer: ADVANCE PROMPTER PLEASE!
(Boone advances prompter.)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Casey Sanchez and Bob Lancelot start off and Mike Peters signals for the bell. Bob Lancelot locks up with Sanchez and they grapple for position. Casey Sanchez takes him over in a headlock. He presses Lancelot's shoulders to the mat.
Referee Mike Peters: 1...(Bob Lancelot rolls him over into a cradle)
Referee Mike Peters: 1...(Casey Sanchez kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Bob Lancelot flips Sanchez to the mat with a hiptoss, then grabs an armbar. He sticks his knee into the ball of Sanchez's shoulder and wrenches up on his bent elbow.
Mike Peters checks in to see if Sanchez submits but he refuses. Sanchez works his way to his feet, and uses his armbarred arm to irish whip Lancelot into the ropes. He nearly takes Lancelot's head off with a clothesline
Guillermo O'Bannon: Casey Sanchez scoops Bob Lancelot up and slams him hard to the mat. He tags in PJ Wright. Sanchez irish whips Lancelot into the ropes and they give him a double hiptoss!
The audience cheers. Wright pops him in the nose with a shotei palm strike and then gives him another headlock takedown. He grinds his forearm into Bob Lancelot's temple
Guillermo O'Bannon: Lancelot works his way up to his feet and pushes Wright off of him into the ropes. Lancelot takes to the air with a flying lariot!
The Palm Springs crowd boos. Bob Lancelot applies a sleeper. Wright struggles to escape but Lancelot has it in cinched in tight. The audience begins clapping in unison to root Wright on. Lancelot shakes his head and says "He ain't going nowhere."
Guillermo O'Bannon: Wright uses the audience to fight his way back to his feet. Bob Lancelot german suplexes him!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(P.J. Wright rolls his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Bob Lancelot tags in Dark Schnitzel. Lancelot applies a figure four leglock on PJ Wright. Meanwhile, Dark Schnitzel applies a figure four necklock to his head. Happy Hour!!
Phil Blauer: You say frog, I jump. (Phil starts mixing himself a kiwi daqurai)
PJ Wright cries out in pain as Lancelot clamps down on his twisted legs and Dark Schnitzel tries to choke him out. Mike Peters gets to the count of five and forces Lancelot to leave the ring
Guillermo O'Bannon: Dark Schnitzel applies a side headlock.
Phil Blauer: This has to be the most headlocks I've seen in a match since Christian vs...Anybody.
Guillermo O'Bannon: PJ Wright pushes Schnitzel off into the ropes, he hits the giant with a dropkick! While Schnitzel tries to get up, PJ Wright rolls him up with a victory roll!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...(Dark Schnitzel kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: PJ Wright runs into the ropes and tastes Schnitzel's boot upside his head!
Phil Blauer: Nice extension. He must do Dark Yoga.
Yolanda Ando: They teach classes every Wednesday at my gym.
Phil Blauer: You can't call it your gym if you never go.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Dark Schnitzel drops a kneedrop between Wright's eyes and tags in Bob Lancelot. Lancelot climbs to the top turnbuckle, and Dark Schnitzel stands on the second turnbuckle. Schnitzel electric chairs Lancelot up on his shoulders. Dark Schnitzel electric chair drivers Lancelot on top of PJ Wright!! Recalcitrant Actors! Whatever the hell that means.
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(PJ Wright kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Bob Lancelot tags him with a european forearm.
Phil Blauer: And he knows how to do those, being from England. It's the same wisdom that goes behind my San Diego Headbutt.
Blauer pops Guillermo in the eye with his forehead
Guillermo O'Bannon: Ow!
Bob Lancelot irish whips PJ Wright into the ropes and drills his head into the canvas with a huracanrana!! He cradles the leg
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Casey Sanchez kicks Lancelot in the back)
Guillermo O'Bannon: While Mike Peters forces Sanchez back to his corner, Bob Lancelot climbs to the top turnbuckle and comes off with a frog splash to PJ Wright's upraised knees!! Lancelot clutches his stomach, and Wright pops him with a side step shuffle kick!
Hardkore Hall comes alive as PJ Wright tries to crawl over to his corner. Bob Lancelot stops him and pulls him up. Wright ducks underneath a punch and back suplexes him
Guillermo O'Bannon: PJ Wright northern lights suplexes him!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Bob Lancelot gets his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Wright finally tags in Casey Sanchez. Wright fireman's carries Lancelot up on his shoulders and sits him on the top turnbuckle. PJ Wright and Casey Sanchez climbs up to the second turnbuckle, double superplex!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Bob Lancelot kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Casey Sanchez irish whips Bob Lancelot into the ropes and catches him on the way back with a sidewalk backbreaker!
Sanchez goes for a belly to back suplex, but Bob Lancelot catches him with a back elbow. Lancelot DDTs his head into the mat
Guillermo O'Bannon: Lancelot irish whips Sanchez into the ropes and goes for a frankenstiener but Sanchez catches him by the legs and powerbombs him!! Sanchez tosses Lancelot over the top rope to the floor below!
Casey Sanchez half nelsons Lancelot and drops him headfirst on the cement with a t-bone suplex! Sanchez scoops Lancelot up and runs him into the corner post, but Lancelot slips off his shoulder and rams Casey's face into the ringpost
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sanchez busted open over his eye! Bob Lancelot retrieves a fork out of his trunks and stabs it into the laceration over & over!
Phil Blauer: I like this guy!
Guillermo O'Bannon: Lancelot holds Sanchez in a choke hold while driving that metal fork into Sanchez's cut. Bob Lancelot climbs to the top turnbuckle and then leaps off into a plancha!!
A blood drenched Sanchez smacks the guardrail back-first. Bob Lancelot rolls back into the ring and tags in Dark Schnitzel. Casey Sanchez staggers back onto the apron
Phil Blauer: Dark Schnitzel hits Sanchez with a Perplexia Uppercut!
Guillermo O'Bannon: Schnitzel pulls Sanchez back into the ring and pulling piledrivers him!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Casey Sanchez kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Dark Schnitzel attempts a suplex, but Sanchez blocks it with his leg. He irish whips Schnitzel into the ropes and then catches him with a swinging sleeperslam!
The fans cheer, and Casey Sanchez tries to wipe some of the blood out of his eyes. Casey Sanchez runs into the ropes and punt kicks Dark Schnitzel in the face
Guillermo O'Bannon: Casey Sanchez goes to pick Dark Schnitzel up but the Schnizzle grabs Sanchez's nuts with a testicular claw! He reaches out with those long arms and tags in Bob Lancelot. He pulls Sanchez's head into his legs while Lancelot climbs to the top turnbuckle. Spike piledriver!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Casey Sanchez kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Bob Lancelot drops back in a russian legsweep! He rolls on top of him in a pinning position!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Casey Sanchez kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Bob Lancelot climbs up to the top turnbuckle, and comes off with a clothesline!
The Palm Springs audience jeers and boos Lancelot. Lancelot climbs up to the top again and comes off with a flying legdrop, but Casey Sanchez rolls out of the way!! The fans come alive
Guillermo O'Bannon: Casey Sanchez atomic drops Bob Lancelot on the top turnbuckle, facing the audience. Sanchez climbs up to the second turnbuckle and half nelsons him. T-bone superplex!!
Hardkore Hall gets louder and a blood drenched Sanchez begins to catch his second wind. He shoots Lancelot into the ropes and smashes him in the face with a Mexican hammer! He traps both of Lancelot's arms
Guillermo O'Bannon: Double arm overhead suplex! Casey Sanchez tags in PJ Wright. Sanchez irish whips Lancelot into the ropes and lifts him up in a flapjack and Wright runs off the ropes with a rude awakening!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Bob Lancelot kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: PJ Wright full nelsons Lancelot and drops back into a dragon suplex!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Bob Lancelot gets his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Wright sits Lancelot on the top turnbuckle and climbs to the second rope. But Lancelot punches Wright until he falls to the mat below. Bob Lancelot jumps off and catches him with a flying huracanrana!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(PJ Wright kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Bob Lancelot pulls his head into his legs and then flips up into a Smashed Up powerbomb!!
Lancelot double underhooks his arms, but PJ Wright backdrops him. Wright climbs up to the top turnbuckle and waits for Lancelot to get to his feet
Guillermo O'Bannon: Flying pump crossbody!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Dark Schnitzel stomps the back of PJ Wright's head)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Casey Sanchez leaps off the top rope and takes out Dark Schnitzel with a flying clothesline! He picks Lancelot up in an electric chair as PJ Wright climbs to the top. Wright catches Lancelot in the face with a spinning heel kick!! The Potentially Dangerous Device!!
former prowrestling.com internet reporter Matt Boone: Not The PDD!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...thr- (Bob Lancelot kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: PJ Wright irish whips Bob Lancelot into the ropes. He dips down for a backdrop, but Bob Lancelot reverses with his swinging neckbreaker, The Swinging Bells!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...3!!!
"All My Life" by Foo Fighters plays and the crowd cheers. Bob Lancelot and Dark Schnitzel raise their arms and soak in the cheers
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "At 16 minutes 54 seconds; THE WINNERS OF THE MATCH, ADVANCING TO THE SECOND ROUND...THE DEVINE COMEDY!!!"
Guillermo O'Bannon: The Devine Comedy scores a big win, advancing to the second round to take on "The Heart Throb" Rich Andrews & "Magnificent" Ron Lauren.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Wow, J.C. South & Captain Jonathan Jones just showed up to the arena!
Phil Blauer: Fuckin traffic.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Our next match will be a series of firsts.
Phil Blauer: Like a date with Yolanda, first you get some, then you get crabs.
Guillermo O'Bannon: First, it will be our first intergender tag team match since September of 2004, when Tamara Sanchez teamed up with Paul Soutter to take on The Shootfighter & Judge Death in Oakland.
Phil Blauer: A classic not seen since the likes of Golddust & Marlena vs. Marc Mero & Sable.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Did they wrestle?
Phil Blauer: Who'm I, Rally?
Guillermo O'Bannon: Anyway, Kate Kealshaw, a woman who's gimmick is eerily close to Mrs. Steven Speilburg's, will team with Tristan Kancer tonight in the first woman to ever compete in the Frank A. Marano Jr. Memorial Cup. Her first challenge will be J.C. South and Captain Jonathan Jones.
Phil Blauer: Is he a nautical captain?
Guillermo O'Bannon: As much as Captain Morgan or Captain Crunch.
Phil Blauer: ...so should I salute?
As “Slutgarden” by Marilyn Manson begins, Manson’s voice cuts through Hardkore Hall while the lights slowly dim to black. Lighters in the crowd begin to flicker as most fans don’t want to miss anything that could happen
Phil Blauer: (holds up his lighter) Woooo!!! SKYNARD!!!
A red spotlight hits the stage as “The Dark Horse Of Professional Wrestling” Tristan Kancer steps from behind the curtain. Those fans who’ve seen GCW know what to expect, and they cheer, but from the rest he gets a moderate reaction. He’s not phased by the reaction, choosing to just smirk as he heads to the ring, knowing that he’ll get a bigger reaction once things get going. He slides under the bottom rope, and turns, giving his evil glare as he waits for his partner. Then a shadow of a Phoenix omits from the Hardkore Hall floor swooping through up to stage screeching before it dissappears. A light glow engulfs the arena as the sound of angels singing fills the air with a harmonic feeling. The soothing sounds of acoustic guitars fills the arena as gnetle light fills the air giving the place a peacful aura. this is soon put to a hault as "Take This Life" by In Flames. Then flames shoot up from the stage Kate appears from behind the curtains covered by a large leather trench coat, the flames flicker in beat with the music and Kate makes her way down the ring, she hops onto the apron and more flames explode out of the four corners of the ring, Kate then procedes to her corner getting herself ready for the match
Phil Blauer: And with that, we've exhausted our pyrotechnic budget for the entire evening.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Tristan Kancer is a former two time GCW Undisputed Champion, GCW Intercontinental Champion, and GCW Tag Team Champion. This isn't Kealshaw's first barbeque. She's been wrestling men for quite a while in GCW, where recently a bizarre series of events lead to the unfounded rumors that Kate Kealshaw had died. They even had a tribute show for her.
Phil Blauer: Oh my god...she's the undead! Take Yolanda, I'm rich and sumptious. Quick Guillermo, you have to shoot em in the brain! First one puts er down, then you put one in her brain. And watch out, they have differing strength levels depending on the movie your watching. Sometimes they can throw you through walls, while others they're more like Attack of the Geriatric Alcoholics.
former prowrestling.com internet reporter Matt Boone: They have good zombies too, like Swamp Thing or Abe Vigoda.
Yolanda Ando: Tristan Kancer wears a black shirt with red lettering declaring “The Kancer Shall...” on the front, and “Consume Us All” on the back accompanied by a biohazard symbol. Black Jeans. Black Military style boots, and black fingerless gloves. He also wears a long black trenchcoat. Kate Kealshaw wears a white tank top and black jeans plus new rock boots.
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "The following first round match is scheduled for one fall with a 30 minute time limit. Your referee is Ron Reid. Our first team represents GCW; in the corner to my right, from Parts Unknown; Standing 6 feet 2 inches tall; Weighing 224 pounds...TRISTAN KANCER!! His partner stands at 5 feet 10 inches tall...KATE KEALSHAW!! They are PHOENIX UPRISING!!!"
Phil Blauer: Tristan's last name strikes fear into the hearts of millions of Americans every day.
Yolanda Ando: And he spells it with a K which makes it cool.
Hardkore Hall cheers. Then sirens come on as "Fuck The Police" by N.W.A. blares onto the PA-System. From behind the curtains comes J.C. South. Coming out he grins showing off his teeth as they were casted in platnum with diamonds imbedded. Captain Jonathan Jones walks down talking shit to the Palm Springs fans as he slides in the ring. He climbs the turnbuckle, raises his arms, then talks more shit to the crowd. J.C. South begins to wave his arms in the air getting the crowd behind him. He then walks down to the ring and climbs in
Guillermo O'Bannon: J.C. South & Captain Jonathan Jones is a brand new team to the best of my knowledge. I like the tunes though. You gotta love rap from the era before Ice Cube sold out.
Phil Blauer: You think I should get my teeth like that, Guillermo?
Guillermo O'Bannon: I think you should get in the habit of brushing your teeth first. Those things are expensive.
Phil Blauer: I hear the Captain has a huge portfolio of naked boy pictures.
Guillermo O'Bannon: I'm pretty sure that's Jeffrey Jones.
Yolanda Ando: J.C. South sports a black no sleeve t-shirt, baggy black pants, and a black do-rag tied on his head. Captain Jonathan Jones wears long white tights, and a captain's jacket with the sleeves cut off.
Phil Blauer: The Captain looks like a gay Skipper.
Yolanda Ando: Oh, the Skipper was gay.
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "Their opponents; first from The Dirty South; Standing 6 feet 2 inches tall; Weighing 230 pounds...J.C. SOUTH!!! His partner is from Miami, Florida; Standing 6 feet 6 inches tall; Weighing 280 pounds...CAPTAIN JONATHAN JONES!!!"
The crowd boos. Tristan Kancer and J.C. South start out. They lock up in a collar & elbow tie-up
Guillermo O'Bannon: Kancer does a go behind and applies a chicken wing. He wrenches up on South's arm, but South reaches back with a back elbow to Kancer's face. J.C. South overhead belly to belly suplexes him!
South bounces into the ropes and drops an elbow across Tristan Kancer's face. Kancer staggers up to his feet and South rushes him, but Tristan drops his throat on the top rope and then rolls him back into a cradle
Referee Ron Reid: 1...(J.C. South gets his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Kancer backs South into his corner with a flurry of european uppercuts and then tags in Kate Kealshaw.
The fans pop at the woman entering the ring to fight some men. Tristan Kancer waistlocks South and Kate Kealshaw comes off the ropes with a superkick! Kancer drops him backwards into a release german suplex
Guillermo O'Bannon: Kate Kealshaw arm drags J.C. South. She grabs South by the leg and twists it & drops down into a figure four leglock. She clamps down on South's twisted legs.
J.C. South sits up and screams some misogynistic obscenities at Kate Kealshaw. She grins and clamps down harder. J.C. South turns it over
Guillermo O'Bannon: Now Kate Kealshaw is the one in some pain, so she slips out. She turns around into a spear by J.C. South!
Hardkore Hall rocks with boos as J.C. South smiles over Kate Kealshaw. J.C. South textbook suplexes Kealshaw
Guillermo O'Bannon: J.C. South bounces into the ropes and drops a leg across Kealshaw's beautiful face. He tags in Captain Jonathan Jones. J.C. South irish whips Kealshaw into the ropes and he & Jones double clotheslines her!
Kealshaw's head whips back from the impact. The fans boo Captain Jonathan Jones as he pulls her up into a crotch-tie. He pulls her up by the arm into a pumphandle slam! The boos get louder as Jones climbs to the top turnbuckle
Guillermo O'Bannon: Captain Jonathan Jones comes off with a flying legdrop!!
Phil Blauer: That legdrop has wings!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...thr- (Tristan Kancer stomps Jones' back)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Jones stands up and brawls with Kancer while Ron Reid tries to get him to go back to his corner. Kate Kealshaw sneaks up behind Jones and drops back into a russian legsweep!
The Palm Springs fans come to life. Kate Kealshaw moves in for the kill with an STF! She clamps down on Captain Jonathan Jones' windpipe, trying to choke him out
Guillermo O'Bannon: Jonathan Jones trying not to be the first man to tap out to a woman in Hardkore history. J.C. South runs into the ring and drops a knee behind Kealshaw's head! She staggers up and Jones catches her with an RKO!!
Jones tags in J.C. South. They both grab a leg and give Kate Kealshaw a double grapevine leglock! Kealshaw howls in pain as both men try to twist her legs out of their sockets
Guillermo O'Bannon: Tristan Kancer enters the ring to stop them, but gets cut-off by Ron Reid, allowing South & Jones to torment her even longer. After a few unneccesary agonizing moments, Reid forces Jones to break his half of the leglock. J.C. South turns it into an ankle lock.
Kate Kealshaw yelps in pain, trying to crawl away from J.C. South but he stands firm. He wrenches her foot to the side, trying to force a submission. He turns her over onto her back and spinning toe holds her into a figure four leglock
Guillermo O'Bannon: Dirty South Figure 4 Leg Lock!! J.C. South and Captain Jonathan Jones are trying to break her legs! She grabs on to Ron Reid's shirt in agony but then thinks better of it when her hands come back dirtier than when they left.
Tristan Kancer climbs to the top turnbuckle and jumps off with a double stomp to J.C. South's chest!! The crowd roars. South breaks the Dirty South Figure 4 Leg Lock, and Kate Kealshaw limps up to her feet
Guillermo O'Bannon: Kealshaw DDTs J.C. South! South gets up and catches another superkick under the chin!
Kate Kealshaw tags in Tristan Kancer and the fans erupt. Kancer shoots J.C. South into the ropes and tiltawhirls him into a quebradora con hilo backbreaker
Guillermo O'Bannon: Kancer scoops South up and runs him into the turnbuckle, but South falls behind him and rams him into the turnbuckle. South hits Kancer low, in the testicals!
The fans boo as Tristan Kancer keels over. J.C. South implant DDTs him! He rolls him over into a pin
Referee Ron Reid: 1...(Tristan Kancer kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: J.C. South goes for a piledriver, but Kancer back body drops him! Tristan drops down to his knees with a bareback jawbreaker!
Phil Blauer: Must...not...make...Brokeback Mountain...joke. Getting...cliche....
former prowrestling.com internet reporter Matt Boone: That movie's a masterpeice. The best gay love story I've ever seen not starring Jeff Stryker.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Tristan Kancer climbs to the top turnbuckle and comes off with a flying splash, but J.C. South puts his knees up into Kancer's stomach! J.C. South fisherman's suplexes him!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Tristan Kancer gets his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: J.C. South tags in Captain Jonathan Jones. Captain Jonathan Jones pulls Kancer's head into his legs while South climbs to the top turnbuckle. Spike piledriver!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Tristan Kancer kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Jonathan Jones legdrops Tristan Kancer. He pulls Kancer up and irish whips him into the ropes, and catches him on the way back with a blackhole slam he calls The Whirlpool Slam!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Tristan Kancer kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Captain Jonathan Jones fireman's carries Kancer up on his shoulders. Kancer falls back behind Jones on his feet in an inverted facelock. Reverse DDT!!
The crowd cheers. Tristan Kancer facewashes Jones' face a few times. He pulls Jones up into a crucifix then drives the back of his head with a razor's edge!! The Palm Springs fans pop, and Kancer tags in Kate Kealshaw
Guillermo O'Bannon: Tristan Kancer turns Captain Jonathan Jones over into a boston crab. Kate Kealshaw limps into the ropes and baseball slides into Jones' face!
The audience applauds. Kealshaw swinging neckbreakers Jonathan Jones! She steps out on the apron, and slingshots herself onto the middle of the top rope
Guillermo O'Bannon: Kate Kealshaw comes off with a springboard tornado DDT!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Captain Jonathan Jones kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Kate headlocks Jones, but he drops her on the back of her head with a Captain's Slam!
The fans boo. Jonathan Jones easily lifts Kealshaw over his head and walks her over to the corner. He sits her on the top turnbuckle and climbs up to the second rope
Guillermo O'Bannon: Captain Jonathan Jones superplexes Kate Kealshaw!! He rolls on top of her in a pin!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Tristan Kancer stomps the back of Jones' head)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Ron Reid forces Kancer back to his corner. Jonathan Jones scoops Kealshaw up into a fallaway slam that tosses her across the ring...but she falls on her feet!
The crowd pops at the show of balance. Jonathan Jones rushes her with a clotheslines but she tumbles underneath it and tags in Tristan Kancer. The Palm Springs crowd erupts
Guillermo O'Bannon: J.C. South comes running in but Tristan Kancer catches him with The Kancer Diagnosis superkick!! Jonathan Jones gets The Kancer Diagnosis as well!!
Kate Kealshaw climbs to the top turnbuckle, and then she and Kancer deliver a spike piledriver on Jonathan Jones
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...thr-(J.C. South stomps Kancer's back)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Tristan Kancer scoops Captain Jonathan Jones up, but Jones slips behind him and applies an inverted facelock. He lifts Kancer up into a lifting reverse Pirate DDT!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...3!!!
“Fuck The Police" by NWA plays and the audience cheers
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "At 13 minutes 7 seconds; THE WINNERS OF THE MATCH, ADVANCING TO THE SECOND ROUND...CAPTAIN JONATHAN JONES & J.C. SOUTH!!!"
Phil Blauer: Well, better late then never.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Jones & South pull out the upset of the tournament by defeating GCW superstars Kate Kealshaw & Tristan Kancer!
Guillermo O'Bannon: Our next match is between UPW's Revolution X and Shingo & Masato. This match features three wrestlers from the burgeoning SWAT Rocky Mountains area. Jack Kross is a headliner over there after his feud with Killer, and Shingo & Masato just joined to head up their tag team division.
"Uh Huh" by Method Man begins to play. Uncle Kracka comes out smoking a cigarette and drinking a bottle of tequila. Then a shadowy figure steps out on the stage with his hands out.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Tequila?!?! But Sandman and Stone Cold only drink beer!
Phil Blauer: Just when you think they couldn't raise the level of extreme any higher...
The shadowy figure claps his hands together and pryo goes off and the lights come back on showing Jack Kross.
Phil Blauer: Who's who again?
Guillermo O'Bannon: That guy's Jack Kross. His uncle's the guy sliding.
Uncle Kracka slides in the ring, finishes the bottle, and throws it into the crowd.
Phil Blauer: DUCK!
Jack Kross gives some of the fans high fives and others that hate him he bad mouths.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Kross bad mouthing the woman Uncle Kracka hit with his tequila bottle!
former prowrestling.com internet reporter Matt Boone: You said it would be safe for my mother!
Phil Blauer: Read the back of her ticket.
Finaly Kross gets in the ring and stands on the second rope and more pyro goes of and the music stops. Uncle Kracka climbs the turnbuckle, raises his arms, and puts out his cigarette as the crowd boos him
Phil Blauer: The Palm Springs fan thinking since they can't smoke inside, neither should Kracka.
Guillermo O'Bannon: At the Rod Laver Arena in Melbourne, Australia, Jack Kross was defeated by his nemesis Killer at SWAT's New Year's Nightmare pay-per-view. Jack Kross' California tour hasn't been so pleasant either. Recently he was counted out during a threeway match with GCW Undisputed Champion James Tyrell & GCW Intercontinental Champion Akuma at the Save Mart Center in Fresno, California.
Phil Blauer: Plus he had to go to Fresno.
Guillermo O'Bannon: I don't know much about Uncle Kracka except for the horrible band he's named after.
Phil Blauer: I have it on good authority he's sponsored by Phillip Morris Hoffman.
Yolanda Ando: Jack Kross is wearing blue jeans and a black shirt with the Revolution X logo on it.
Phil Blauer: Oh, see, that's his problem right there.
Yolando Ando: ...He also wears steel-toe boots.
Guillermo O'Bannon: You must love his flagarent disregard for the rules. I mean, even you know he's cheating.
Yolanda Ando: Yeah, but I had to blow him to find out. You don't think I'm reading off some sheet they give me? My job takes some real journalistic hutspah. Now, as I was saying, Uncle Kracka is wearing blue jeans, a black t-shirt with the Revolution X logo, a jeans jacket, and a blue bandana on his head.
former prowrestling.com internet reporter Matt Boone: He smells like a Chevron station.
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "The following first round tag team match is scheduled for one fall with a 30 minute time limit. Your referee is Mike Peters. Featuring first, representing UPW; From Queens, New York; Standing 6 feet 2 inches tall; Weighing 245 pounds...'THE SUICIDE MESSIAH' JACK KROSS!! His partner is from New York City; Standing 6 feet 4 inches tall; Weighing 277 pounds...UNCLE KRACKA!! They are REVOLUTION X!!!"
The Palm Springs fans boo. Then “Romantic Rights” by Death From Above 1979 begins. The bass hits on the down beats, followed by string scratches. When the kick drum pounds on the beats, Shingo and Masato come out with their hardest look, followed by former Hardkore Nippon Junior Heavyweight Champion "Sweet" Richard Romero, who stands between them. Romero raises their arms victoriously. Once the main riff starts, they make their way to the ring, ignoring the crowd entirely, and Romero drops back behind them. When they get to the ring apron, Romero finds his corner post and lets his protégés` take the lime light. Masato enters the ring between the top and middle ropes, while Shingo swings his legs over top rope in an impressive display of agility. They loosen up while waiting for the bell to ring
Guillermo O'Bannon: "Sweet" Richard Romero returns to Hardkore World...sort of. He had a thrilling series in 2003 over the Hardkore Nippon Junior Heavyweight Championship with Tuxedo Mask.
Phil Blauer: '03? That's so long ago, we had Al Queda on the run.
Guillermo O'Bannon: He also had a legendary semi-final match with Andrew Karnage in the Hardkore Nippon Grand Championship Tournament. Now he returns to Hardkore World, at least for this tournament, to manage two of his best proteges.
Phil Blauer: He's Vincent Silvestri without the class.
Yolanda Ando: Shingo wears silver trunks with the rising sun on the ass. He wears black wrestling boots. Masato wears a silver wrestling signet with the Rising Sun in his stomach. He wears black wrestling boots.
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "And their opponents, representing SWAT Rocky Mountains; Accompanied to the ring by their manager, "Sweet" Richard Romero; Both hail from Komatsu, Ishikawa Prefecture, Japan; First, standing 5 feet 6 inches tall; Weighing 195 pounds...MASATO!! His partner stands 6 feet tall; Weighing 170 pounds...SHINGO!!
The Palm Springs crowd roars. Mike Peters signals for the bell and Shingo & Jack Kross elect to start out
Guillermo O'Bannon: Jack Kross irish whips Shingo into the ropes and lifts him into the lights with a high back body drop!
The fans boo Kross. Kross grabs an armbar and squeezes his bent elbow. He sticks his knee into the ball of Shingo's shoulder and pulls back on his arm
Guillermo O'Bannon: Shingo kips up to his feet and arm drags Jack Kross by his armbarred arm. He twists Jack Kross' arm. He gives it another wrench, and then starts laying into Kross' chest with some knife edge chops.
Phil Blauer: Shingo sounds like a dance from the 60's.
Guillermo O'Bannon: I feel like I should whisper it because it might be racist.
Shingo backs Kross into the corner and tags in Masato. Masato sits on the top turnbuckle and braces himself, while Shingo climbs atop his shoulders for a little extra altitude
Guillermo O'Bannon: Shingo jumps off of Masato's shoulders and catches Kross in the face with an elbow smash! Masato scoops Jack Kross up and bodyslams him.
Masato runs into the ropes and drops an elbow across Kross' face. He climbs to the top turnbuckle but Uncle Kracka runs over and grabs him by the leg and crotches him on the the turnbuckle steel cable hook
Guillermo O'Bannon: Jack Kross superplexes Masato Yoshida!
The audience boos Jack Kross.
former prowrestling.com internet reporter Matt Boone: Things haven't been the same since he split with his older brother Kriss. Word backstage is his Uncle has taken on the mentor persona.
Guillermo O'Bannon: That explains why they're dressed alike.
He bounces into the ropes and legdrops him. He scoops Masato up and easily tosses the 195 pounder across the ring with a fallaway slam
Guillermo O'Bannon: Kross tags in Uncle Kracka. Kross irish whips Masato into the ropes and he & Kracka double clothesline him! Uncle Kracka textbook suplexes Masato.
Masato rolls out of the way of an elbow drop. He headbutts Uncle Kracka, and then irish whips him into the ropes
Guillermo O'Bannon: Masato backdrops Uncle Kracka! Kracka stands up and just misses getting nailed with a forearm. He counters with a german suplex!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Masato gets his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Uncle Kracka tags Jack Kross back in, and they double DDT Masato!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Masato kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Jack Kross turns Masato over into a boston crab. He rocks back on Masato's legs, while Peters asks him if he wants to tap out.
Masato shakes his head "no", but Shingo enters the ring and rolls into a kangaroo kick to Jack Kross' back, breaking the boston crab
Guillermo O'Bannon: Masato scoops Kross up and dropping him onto his knee in a backbreaker. Jack Kross ducks underneath a back elbow and counters with a belly to belly suplex!
Jack Kross irish whips Masato into the ropes, and runs at him with a clothesline, but Masato ducks. Kross comes back from the other side of the ropes, and Masato tiltawhirl suplexes him
Guillermo O'Bannon: Masato tags in Shingo, and then electric chairs Jack Kross onto his shoulders. Shingo climbs to the top turnbuckle and leaps off into a flying clothesline to Kross!! Doomsday Device!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Jack Kross kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Shingo irish whips Jack Kross into the ropes and then hits him flush in the face with a spinning crescent kick!
Shingo climbs to the top rope and flies off with a plancha, but Jack Kross catches him and powerslams him hard into the mat! The Palm Springs fans boo as Kross hooks his leg
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Shingo kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Jack Kross pulls Shingo up in a front facelock and then swings into a twist of fate!
The boos are deafening as Jack Kross climbs to the top turnbuckle. Masato runs over and trips Kross, crotching him on the turnbuckle. Shingo runs up to the second turnbuckle and fireman's carries him on his shoulder
Guillermo O'Bannon: Rolling hangover!! Shingo snap suplexes Jack Kross into the corner, and then tags in Masato. He and Shingo stuff powerbomb Jack Kross!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Jack Kross kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Masato runs Kross' eyes along the ropes, until Kross back elbows him in the gut. He grabs a side headlock on Jack Kross, grinding his forehead into Masato's temple.
Masato pushes Jack Kross off into the ropes, and then lou thez presses him
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Jack Kross gets his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Masato climbs to the top turnbuckle, but Uncle Kracka hangs onto his foot. While he's trapped, Jack Kross climbs up to meet him on the top turnbuckle...super bomb!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Shingo kicks Kross in the back of the head)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Jack Kross wraps up Masato's legs and turns him over into a texas cloverleaf! He bends Masato's spine backwards, crouching as low as he can.
Hardkore Hall boos Jack Kross and he talks back to an especially loud couple in the front row. He reaches out and tags in Uncle Kracka, who applies a crippler crossface while Kross maintains the texas cloverleaf
Guillermo O'Bannon: Uncle Kracka pulls up on Masato's head & arm while Jack Kross bends his legs towards his head. Mike Peters laying in the count, gets to five, and then forces Jack Kross out of the ring. Uncle Kracka irish whips Masato into the ropes and spinebusters him!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Masato kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: He pulls Masato up and flips him over in the Rollin a J belly to belly suplex!
Uncle Kracka waistlocks Masato and he back elbows him. He northern lights suplexes Uncle Kacka
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Uncle Kracka rolls his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Masato lifts Uncle Kracka up on his shoulders in a fireman's carry, then samoan drops him!
The audience cheers, and Masato lifts Kracka up in a hanging suplex, then drops him into a gourdbuster! He tags in Shingo. Masato electric chairs Uncle Kracka up onto his shoulders as Shingo climbs up to the turnbuckle
Guillermo O'Bannon: Masato walks Kracka towards Shingo who missle dropkicks him off of Masato's shoulders!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Uncle Kracka kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Shingo shoots Uncle Kracka into the ropes and hits him with a diving lariot!
The audience is deafening, as Uncle Kracka pulls himself up by the ropes. Shingo goes for a hiptoss but Kracka blocks it and lifts him up onto his shoulders in a fireman's carry. He swings him around into a TKO
Guillermo O'Bannon: Uncle Kracka lifts Shingo up into a hanging suplex, then drops him down into a brainbuster!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Shingo kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Uncle Kracka climbs to the top turnbuckle, but "Sweet" Richard Romero jumps up on the apron. He shakes the ropes and crotches Kracka on the top turnbuckle. Shingo runs up the ropes, and takes him over in a huracanrana!!
The Hardkore Hall pops and Shingo climbs up to the top turnbuckle. He leaps off into a frog splash from the lights
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Uncle Kracka kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Shingo tags in Masato. Masato sticks both of his knees into Uncle Kracka's back and then rolls him up into a bow & arrow. Shingo climbs up to the top turnbuckle and flips into a cannonball to Uncle Kracka's exposed stomach!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...3!!!
The Palm Springs Convention Center erupts as “Romantic Rights” by Death From Above 1979 plays. "Sweet" Richard Romero hits the ring and raises both his protege's arms
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "At 15 minutes 11 seconds; THE WINNERS OF THE MATCH, ADVANCING TO THE SECOND ROUND...MASATO & SHINGO!!!"
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sweet Dick's team comes out smelling like an ashtray and advances!
(Dr. Tojo Sushi walks to the podium.)
Dr. Tojo Sushi: (taps the mic to make sure it's on) Good evening. I would like to take a moment to talk to you about JoJo Sushi presents: Hardkore Nippon. This month, tune in to see The Rising Sun probably win the Hardkore Nippon Grand Championship. JoJo needs somebody to hold the title until he puts in on Syberus, then eventually himself, and can think of nobody more up for the job than Sun.
(Advancing to his next index card.)
Dr. Tojo Sushi: Two champions and only one belt! That's the Hardkore Nippon Western Pacific title picture for you. Gozo Shioda and The Shootfighter treated Arakawa like their punk ass bitch before they both pinned him at the exact same time. This month, in Sendai, each man defends his half of the championship; Shioda wrapped in barbed wire against his arch rival Akira Kyoto. And The Shootfighter faces American pro wrestling superstar "Big Time" Carson Parker in HIS match; a stainless steel singapore cane ladder match.
(Advancing to his next index card.)
Dr. Tojo Sushi: At Palm Springs Punishment we will award the Hardkore Nippon Junior Heavyweight Title to the winner of an over the top rope royal rumble style battle royal LIVE via satelitte from Bangkok, Thailand. Sign up now. Big things are happening in JoJo Sushi presents: Hardkore Nippon.
(Advancing to his next index card.)
Dr. Tojo Sushi: JoJo sees the next generation of Hardkore Nippon superstars in this tag team tournament. Mike Hunt, you have it on direct authority, JoJo likes what he sees. You got...IT. JoJo knows IT when he sees IT. Now create a Japanese alter ego and bring IT over to JoJo Sushi presents: Hardkore Nippon before you lose IT gaying it up in GCW.
(Tojo goes off script.)
Dr. Tojo Sushi: GCW is not gay because of you, it's gay in spite of you Mike Hunt.
(Back to his notes.)
Dr. Tojo Sushi: I would also like to extend an invitation on be half of JoJo to The Kross Brothers, Jack and Kriss, and their uncle Kracka Kross. Come to Nippon, JoJo has a hard on for brother tag teams and family stables.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Coming up is a match I've been waiting for since the brackets were announced. The New Axis vs. Praised or Persecuted. Four legendary wrestlers from UCW & GCW come together for the very first round of the Frank A. Marano Jr. Cup.
Phil Blauer: This one could main event anywhere in the world! Which one is Persecuted again?
Hardkore Hall goes dark as the wailing guitar begins. Spotlights travel back and forth along the Palm Springs crowd as the roar becomes deafening. BANG! The pyro explodes and a row of flames appear on the right and left hand side of the aisle. The drums louden as the Outrider cruises down the aisle and through the fires on his custom made, gun-metal, Harley. He circles the ring once and then parks the bike near the announcer's table
Phil Blauer: Oh yeah, I saw that at Undertaker's yard sale. It's the only one small enough for arena aisles.
Guillermo O'Bannon: GCW Hall of Famer Outrider is a two time GCW Undisputed Champion and former GPW Heavyweight Champ. He also has one of the most involved ring entrances of the tournament.
Outrider takes off his long black leather jacket and draping it along the seat. The Dark Rider then pulls himself up on to the apron and enters the ring through the second and third ropes. Stepping to the dead center he tightens his gloves firmly to each hand and removes his sunglasses before throwing them blindly to the Palm Springs fans. Suddenly, the ever familiar guitar rift of the incomparable and controversial Michael Hunter plays with POD’s “Boom”. The music blares through out the sea of humanity while reaching every fan in attendance along with white and red strobe lights that flicker through out the Hardkore Hall ceiling. As the Palm Springs crowd explodes with a standing ovation mixed with some jeers towards “The Man“, Hunter charismatically shows up on stage yelling, smiling and posing by flexing and pointing to his bicep before making his way down the ramp with his regular swagger. He suddenly gets in the camera man’s lens and mouths the words “I am The Man“
Phil Blauer: Did you get that, Guillermo? He da man!
Guillermo O'Bannon: He certainly is. He's a two time GCW Undisputed Champion, NEW World Heavyweight Champion, WEF Universal Champion, EWF Intercontinental Champion, two time EWF Atlantic Champion, plus a WEF Extreme-core Champion.
Phil Blauer: Extreme-core? Was that unifying snafu, or was that after he won US-Continental Title?
Following that, Mike Hunter pushes the camera away, then looks to the crowd, gives some high fives to the guys and a few kisses to the females in the front row. Just as Hunter gets to the center of the runway, a wall of dazzling pyros follows him to the ring as he projects that good ol’ vintage Hunter cocky smile. When he gets to the squared circle he poses at two corners before getting in the center of the ring, dropping to one knee and flexing his arms as pyros shoot out from behind him starting at the two corners and making their way to the center where they clash in a spectacular display of pyrotechnics. Hunter then begins to do some mock push ups before he runs against the ropes like Ric Flair for a laugh before he gets ready for the match
Guillermo O'Bannon: These two know each other really well. They were voted feud of the year by prowrestling.com.
former prowrestling.com internet reporter Matt Boone: Got my vote. Also, make sure to click below to read why Jeff Jarrett will be on Raw this Monday. FREE TORRIE PICS!!
Phil Blauer: Free! Who's Torrie?
Yolanda Ando: Michael Hunter wears some red, silver and black army fatigue wrestling tights, Black and white wrestling boots. Black wristbands and finger gloves. Outrider wears black sleeveless T-shirt that says "Judgement is Coming" on the front and "Ride Out!" on the back. Black leather riding gloves. Fitted leather pants. Black leather riding boots.
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "The following first round match is scheduled for one fall and a 30 minute time limit. Your referee is Ron Reid. Featuring first, representing GCW; Featuring first, from Parts Unknown; Standing 6 feet 1 inch tall; Weighing 240 pounds...THE OUTRIDER!! His partner is from New York City; Standing 6 feet 1 inch tall; Weighing 228 pounds...'THE INFAMOUS' MICHAEL HUNTER!! They are PRAISED OR PERSECUTED!!!"
The Palm Springs crowd cheers. A huge countdown clock appears and a voice starts to talk….
Guillermo O'Bannon: Yippie! A countdown.
David Sadler will steal the show in 5 seconds
David Sadler will steal the show in 4 seconds
David Sadler will steal the show in 3 seconds
David Sadler will steal the show in 2 seconds
David Sadler will steal the show…………………….Boom fireworks shoot from the ramp. The fans beat the flames out on the beer guy.
"Bound to Violence" by Hatebreed starts up. The words "Bound to violence Gagged by pain Drowned in self-regret this grief is the sentence you face" sound then a brief pause as the background music continues. Just as the next verse hits a cloud of smoke engulfs the stage then Williams and Sadler emerge just the next verse kicks in "Incomplete, you've lost your way Struggling with rationale In a world so cold and bleak How could this be a place for you?". Black and white lights violently flash all around the arena as both men head to the ring. They walk with a blank face concentrating solely on the ring not letting anything stop them. Lee steps over the top rope while Sadler climbs through the ropes and as they enter the ring the go to opposite turnbuckles doing their signature gestures. They dismount from the turnbuckles then talk to each other waiting
Guillermo O'Bannon: David Sadler & Lee Williams are two of UCW's biggest stars; they're former GCW & UCW World Tag Team Champions. They also have been feuding with GCW's biggest stars as of late and have been licking their chops to get their hands on these two.
Phil Blauer: Lee Williams told me of all the teams to get in the first round, this was the toughest draw.
Guillermo O'Bannon: You talk to Lee Williams?
Phil Blauer: Sure do, I was doing a piece on foreigners and whether their presence in our country rots it from within.
Guillermo O'Bannon: For what?
Phil Blauer: For fun.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Lee Williams and Dave Sadler have had a run of bad luck lately. David Sadler tapped out to SWAT World Heavyweight Champion Nic Collyer's Minor Threat at the main event of St. Valentine's Day Broken Hearts on pay-per-view. The New Axis also recently lost a UCW match at The Carrier Dome, in Syracuse, New York to The Impact Playaaaas, Brandon Smith & Jermaine Daniels.
Phil Blauer: Wasn't that Lance Storm & Justin Credible?
Guillermo O'Bannon: That was the Impact Players.
Phil Blauer: Oh.
Yolanda Ando: Lee Williams wears black elbow/knee pads and boots.
Phil Blauer: Thank God I bought that black elbow/knee pad stock. It's paying off like weaponary.
Yolanda Ando: He's also wearing a black tank top with Lee Williams in white on the front and his initials “LW” centred in a logo on top of a cross on his back, which is also in white. Black pants with “The Way of the Williams” on his left leg which is in white, then a large white cross on his right leg. David Sadler wears baggy cut off jean shorts. Black knee and elbow pads and white boots with black trim. Pale skinned with blue eyes, long brown hair and clean shaven.
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "Representing UCW; From Essex, England; Standing 6 feet 11 inches tall; Weighing 322 pounds...'THE REVOLUTION OF WRESTLING' LEE WILLIAMS!! His partner is from Ipswich, England; Standing 5 feet 11 inches tall; Weighing 250 pounds...'THE SAVIOUR OF PROFESSIONAL WRESTLING' LEE WILLIAMS!! They are THE NEW AXIS!!!"
The fans give them a mixed reaction. Lee Williams and Outrider elect to start off. Outrider hits Williams with a double ax handle
Guillermo O'Bannon: Outrider applies a million dollar dream on the big man. He pulls back on Williams' arm and applies pressure to the back of Lee's neck.
Outrider jumps onto the back of Lee Williams to try and get some leverage on the near seven footer. Williams backs Outrider into the corner, crushing him with his 322 pounds
Guillermo O'Bannon: Lee Williams sticks his boot in Outrider's throat, choking him with his leg fully extended. He then rams his knee into Outrider's stomach a few times.
Lee Williams grabs the ropes and starts ramming his shoulder into Outrider's stomach, before tagging in Dave Sadler. Lee Williams and David Sadler pull Outrider out of the corner with a front facelock
Guillermo O'Bannon: The New Axis double DDT Outrider!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...(Michael Hunter stomps David Sadler's back)
Guillermo O'Bannon: David Sadler smashes Outrider in the face with a few hard rights. Sadler ends it with a hard forearm smash across his chin. He shoots Outrider into the ropes, but he comes back with a flying forearm to Sadler's face!
The crowd cheers. Outrider snap suplexes Sadler, and then applies an STF! He pulls up on Sadler's head, clamping down on his windpipe. Ron Reid checks in to see if Sadler wants to tap out but he refuses
Guillermo O'Bannon: Lee Williams runs in and breaks up the STF. Outrider rolls over and tags in Michael Hunter. Praised or Persecuted double gut wrench suplex David Sadler!
Michael Hunter belly to belly suplexes David Sadler over his shoulder. He pulls Sadler up by the hair, and irish whips him into the ropes
Guillermo O'Bannon: Michael Hunter spinning heel kicks David Sadler in the face! Sadler rolls out of the way of an elbow drop, and runs into the ropes. He nearly takes Hunter's head off with a Rage-line!
The Palm Springs fans boo. Michael Hunter stands up just in time to get caught on the button with a standing dropkick
Guillermo O'Bannon: David Sadler pulls Hunter up into a powerbomb, but Hunter reverses it into a huracanrana! He rolls over and tags Outrider back in. Outrider bearhugs Sadler as Hunter runs into the ropes. Hunter comes back with a hart attack clothesline!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(David Sadler kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Outrider pumphandle slams David Sadler in the center of the ring!
David Sadler pulls himself up by the ropes. Outrider moves in for the kill, but Sadler kicks him away. Outrider catches his boot, but Sadler swings around with an enzuigiri kick
Guillermo O'Bannon: David Sadler textbook suplexes Outrider! He shoots him into the ropes, but Outrider ducks under another Ragesline, and responds with a quick release german suplex!
The audience erupts. Outrider irish whips Sadler into the ropes, ducks down for a backdrop, but Sadler counters DDT! The fans boo, and Sadler tags in Lee Williams
Guillermo O'Bannon: David Sadler sets Outrider up in a rock bottom, but Lee Williams comes off the ropes with a big boot to Outrider's face while Sadler jams him into the mat with a uranage!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Outrider kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Lee Williams headbutts Outrider, and then irish whips him into the ropes. Outrider comes back with a hooked lariot!
Outrider goes for a suplex but Lee Williams is far too large. Lee reverses it and holds Outrider up in a hanging suplex. He shows them to all four corners of the Palm Springs Convention Center, then drops him to the mat with a suplex
Guillermo O'Bannon: Lee Williams pulls Outrider up by the hair but gets kicked in the stomach. Outrider hits him with a stunner!
The fans cheer. Outrider applies a dragon sleeper on Williams. He cranes Lee's head back, clamping down on his neck & chin. Ron Reid checks in to see if he submits
Guillermo O'Bannon: Outrider leans back on Lee Williams head with that dragon sleeper, then reaches out and tags in Michael Hunter. Hunter climbs to the top turnbuckle and Outrider releases the dragon sleeper. He walks over to the corner and Hunter moonsaults Lee Williams off of Outrider's shoulders!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Lee Williams kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Michael Hunter gets a running start and dropped an elbow in Lee's chest! He pulls Williams up and irish whips him into the ropes, he bicycle kicks him in the chest, but Williams no-sells it!
The Palm Springs fans boo. Williams smiles, and running clotheslines Michael Hunter! He pulls Hunter up by the hair, and lifts him in a fireman's carry
Guillermo O'Bannon: Lee Williams drops him on his head with The Green Mile!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Michael Hunter kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Williams wraps Hunter's leg around into a spinning toe hold, then drops down into a Figure Four Lee Lock! He clamps down on Hunter's bent kneecap, while Hunter reaches out to tag in Outrider.
The fans boo, and start to clap faster & faster for Michael Hunter to turn the figure four over. Hunter gets halfway over, with Ron Reid asking him if he wants to submit. But with Reid's back turned, he doesn't see David Sadler drag Lee towards his corner
Guillermo O'Bannon: With some help from Sadler, Lee is close enough to make the tag. Williams pulls Hunter's head into his legs as Sadler climbs to the top turnbuckle. Spike piledriver!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Michael Hunter kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sadler belly to back suplexes Hunter. He applies another figure four leglock! Michael Hunter sits up in pain, while Sadler uses those powerful legs to apply amazing pressure to Hunter's ankle & knee.
Michael Hunter clutches both sides of his hair in pain, and then reaches out for the bottom rope. Sadler shakes his head and says "He's not going anywhere." Michael Hunter scoots along the canvas, and is able to get to the bottom rope
Guillermo O'Bannon: Reid trying to get him to break the leglock, but Sadler will not stop! Outrider can't take anymore and enters the ring. Outrider stomps and kicks Sadler, forcing him to break the figure four.
That pops the fans and Michael Hunter limps up to his feet. Michael Hunter irish whips David Sadler into the ropes and drop toe holds him into an STF! Hunter has that arm locked tight around Sadler's throat. The front row of the audience slaps the railing chanting "TAP!! TAP!! TAP!! TAP!! TAP!!"
Guillermo O'Bannon: Hunter has The Standard Issue STF locked in! David Sadler reaches out for the ropes, but they're still too far. Michael Hunter pulls up on Sadler's head & neck, swinging for the fences. Lee Williams steps over the top rope and stomps Hunter's back, breaking up The Standard Issue.
Ron Reid forces Lee Williams back to his corner. Michael Hunter t-bone suplexes David Sadler and limps to the top turnbuckle from inside the ring
Guillermo O'Bannon: The 2004 GCW King of Death Match Tournament Winner Michael Hunter backflips into another gorgeous moonsault!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(David Sadler kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Michael Hunter tags in Outrider. Outrider pulls Sadler up into a powerbomb, and then Michael Hunter drops his good leg across his neck with a leg drop!! Outrider flips over into a cradle!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(David Sadler gets his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Outrider dragon suplexes David Sadler!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(David Sadler rolls his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Outrider bounces into the ropes, but Sadler catches him on the way back with a sidewalk slam!
The crowd boos. David Sadler irish whips Outrider into the ropes and backdrops him into the ropes
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sadler climbs to the top turnbuckle and comes off with a flying body press, but Outrider catches him and powerslams him! He scoops Sadler up and drills his head into the mat with a tombstone piledriver!
Outrider irish whips Sadler into the ropes and catches him with a spinebuster, but Sadler reverses it into a tornado DDT! He tags in Lee Williams
Guillermo O'Bannon: Lee Williams shoots Outrider into the ropes and The New Axis catch him with a 3D!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Michael Hunter breaks up the pin)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Lee Williams climbs to the top turnbuckle and dives off with a flying clothesline!
Hardkore Hall boos as Lee Williams has some words with Hunter in the corner. Williams climbs the ropes again, but this time Hunter limps over and shakes the ropes, crotching Williams on the turnbuckle! The crowd cheers
Guillermo O'Bannon: Outrider climbs up to the second rope and uses all of his might to full nelson slam Williams off the top rope To Hell!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Lee Williams kicks out)
Phil Blauer: What a match!
Guillermo O'Bannon: That To Hell move took alot out of Outrider and he has some trouble catching his breath. But Williams catches him by the throat with that massive hand. He chokeslams Outrider into the mat!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Outrider kicks out)
Lee Williams irish whips Outrider into the ropes, but Outrider ducks under a clothesline. He responds with a chicken wing crossface. Outrider's 10 inch shortfall with Lee makes the choke even more devastating, with Lee being bent backwards while having his elbow wrenched up
Guillermo O'Bannon: Lee Williams trying to back elbow Outrider with his good arm, but Outrider ducks and gives his arm another tug. Lee Williams backs into his corner and crushes Outrider in the turnbuckles again. Lee Williams cracks Outrider in the face with a few elbows and tags in Dave Sadler.
Lee Willams drops Outrider across his knee in a backbreaker. David Sadler climbs up to the top turnbuckle and comes off with an elbow drop, flipping him head over heels!! The fans boo
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Outrider kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Dave Sadler lifts him up into a powerbomb!! He cradles the legs!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Outrider gets his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sadler grabs a sleeper hold with Outrider on the mat.
Phil Blauer: Sadler slowing the match down. Which is good cause I have to run Snow Dogs back to the video store.
Sadler cuts off Outrider's air, squeezing his throat with his forearm. Outrider fights his way to his feet, and then drops down to his knees, shooting the top of his head through Sadler's chin
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sadler staggers around, and Outrider picks him up into a human torture rack. He flips him over into a burning hammer he calls Hung Jury!!
Phil Blauer: Why?
Guillermo shrugs. Outrider butterflies David Sadler's arms and then tosses him across the ring with a double underhook suplex
Guillermo O'Bannon: Outrider drops Sadler with an inverted DDT! He tags in Michael Hunter, who sets Sadler up in a russian legsweep. Outrider comes off the ropes with a flying forearm while Hunter drops back in a russian legsweep!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(David Sadler kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Michael Hunter lifts Sadler up in suplex, then drops his feet on the ropes and 25th Hour slingshot suplexes him!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(David Sadler kicks out)
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "Twenty Minutes Have Elapsed. 10 Minutes Remaining."
Guillermo O'Bannon: Michael Hunter piledrives David Sadler!! He climbs to the top turnbuckle and backflips into a moonsault but Sadler rolls out of the way!!
Hunter's stomach hits the mat hard, and Sadler leg drops the back of his head. David Sadler climbs to the top turnbuckle
Guillermo O'Bannon: David Sadler comes off the top with a flying elbow!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Michael Hunter kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sadler irish whips Michael Hunter into the ropes with a yakuza kick! He tags in Lee Williams. The New Axis double spinebusters Michael Hunter!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...thr- (Michael Hunter kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Lee Williams scoops Hunter up and tosses him over his shoulder in a fallaway slam, then catches his head in a neckbreaker! Moment of Clarity!
Phil Blauer: What a manuever!
Guillermo O'Bannon: Lee Williams shoots Hunter into the ropes but Mike comes back with a hart attack clothesline!
The crowd cheers wildly. Michael Hunter stands up onto the second turnbuckle and comes off with a spinning heel kick
Guillermo O'Bannon: Hunter half nelsons Williams, but Lee back elbows him. English Leg Sweep!
Phil Blauer: Does everyone get a leg sweep?
Guillermo O'Bannon: Michael Hunter irish whips Williams, but Lee reverses it and shoots him into the ropes. Michael Hunter slides through Lee Williams' legs, and comes up from behind Lee. He Incursion running bulldogs Williams' throat on the top rope!
The audience cheers louder. Michael Hunter tags in Outrider. Outrider side backbreakers Lee Williams while Hunter climbs to the top turnbuckle
Guillermo O'Bannon: Michael Hunter comes off the top rope with a leg drop, flipping him over Outrider's knee!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...thr- (David Sadler stomps the back of Outrider's head)
Guillermo O'Bannon: The Outrider smacks Lee Williams on the side of his head with a Double Barrell shining wizard with both knees!!
Lee Williams drops to one side. The Outrider twists his knees up and turns Williams over into a texas cloverleaf! He rocks back on Lee Williams spine, as Williams tries to crawl over to the ropes. Ron Reid asks him if he wants to tap out
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sadler in the ring once again and cracks Outrider in the head with a chair!!
The sound of the concussion rocks through Hardkore Hall, and the fans boo. The Outrider tips over to one side with Lee Williams' legs still in his hands. Michael Hunter limps into the ring and begins brawling with David Sadler, who rains on Hunter's face with Rage Punches
Guillermo O'Bannon: Lee Williams puts the chair over The Outrider's face and climbs to the top turnbuckle. He comes off with a leg drop to the chair over Outrider's skull!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...thr- (The Outrider gets his foot on the bottom rope)
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "Twenty Five Minutes Have Elapsed. 5 Minutes Remaining."
Guillermo O'Bannon: Lee Williams sets the chair up in the center of the ring. He grabs Outrider by the head and diamond cutters his throat on the back of the chair!!
The audience boos, as The Outrider wanders around the ring, clutching his throat. Lee Williams picks up the chair
Guillermo O'Bannon: Michael Hunter van daminators the chair into Lee Williams' skull!! The Outrider superkicks Lee Williams into a german suplex!! Persecuted!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...3!!!
The Palm Springs fans erupt as Screaming Tree's "Shadows of the Season" plays throughout Hardkore Hall
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "At 26 minutes 27 seconds; THE WINNERS OF THE MATCH, ADVANCING TO THE SECOND ROUND...PRAISED OR PERSECUTED!!!"
Guillermo O'Bannon: Easily the best match of the first round so far!! Praised or Persecuted go on to the next round, against the winner of The K.G.B. vs. The Microshocker & Bad Boy King Kong. The last match of the first round, coming up!
The Shootfighter is in the lockerroom looking solemn as he looks slowly at the camera. He is wearing his black knee length wrestling tights, black wrestling boots and his chest length hair is tied in a pony tail.)
The Shootfighter: "Tonight is the night that I've been waiting for for quite a while. Tonight is the Frank A. Marano, Jr. Memorial Tag Team Tournament. I plan to honor a man whom I respect a lot. Frank A. Marano, Jr. was a man despite his illness tried everything he could to keep the old UWA open."
(He gets up and slowly puts on his black robe with a red dragon on the back.)
The Shootfighter: "I almost started wrestling in the UWA/Florida Region but unfortunately the region and the entire promotion folded. At least he was willing to accept me....."
(He starts getting a disdainful look in his face.)
The Shootfighter: "That was when I was with those idiots The Brotherhood of the Hun. Only Adolph got to wrestle one match but I never got to wrestle! Well that's the past and this is the present!"
(He grows solemn again.)
The Shootfighter: "Now tonight I shall honor Marano's great name. I shall be teaming up with James Fierce and the KGB is going to win the tournament. True the money and the glory is great. The honoring of a man who was way ahead of his time is even better."
(The Shootfighter's face becomes a mask of hate, rage and fury.)
The Shootfighter: "This brings me to the opponents we face! Microshocker and King Kong Bad Boy! I've just about had it with your constant bragging about beating me! One little victory by way of your using that joke of a manager Mr. Computer! One little victory and you consider that the greatest victory of your career! Well you are going to find out the truly hard way Microshocker that that was just a fluke!"
(He slowly goes over to a corner and picks up his stainless steel singapore cane and caresses it lovingly.)
The Shootfighter: "Have you ever been bashed over and over again in your skull with this Microshocker! Well you're going to find out how it's like to eat your own words as I unleash my hate, rage and fury upon you! This cane is going to crash into yopur skull again and again! When your bodyguard enters I'll give him some of this too! That way you two love objects can be nice and comfortable lying next to each other in the ring! Meanwhile the KGB moves on!"
(The Shootfighter's face grows even more angrier.)
The Shootfighter: "Why did you ever bother returning to Hardkore World when you are nothing but a loser and shall always be a loser!
Why not stay forever in SWAT so you can at least claim you did something significant! You returned here and you continue your pathetic record of embarrassing yourself! I'll seal your fate once and for all! You'll have to watch when James Fierce and I win the whole tournament! Prepare for great pain and agony that even you haven't experienced! Prepare for Mortal Kombat!"
(The lockerroom door opens and Judge Death enters with two Hooded Men. He is wearing black judges robes, black boots, a white Colonial Era wig, a metal gargoyle's mask and wields a cane that has a gargoyle's head on the top.)
Judge Death: "Are you prepared for the first round tag match."
The Shootfighter: "I am. I'm doing this to honor Marano."
Judge Death: "Yes a fine goal it is too. Glory and money is good but honoring one of the great promoters is even better. I remember my days in UWA/Mid-South Region and I managed my men well but unfortunately they almost won the tag and six-man titles. Then the promotion folded. Oh well at least it's a fine cherished memory. Tonight you and Fierce are going to find Microshocker and King Kong Bad Boy guilty on all counts of perversion."
The Shootfighter: "Don't worry I plan to give him the most severe punishment! His bodyguard is going to get just as worse!"
Judge Death: "Save it all for the match and then keep saving it for the rest of the tournament appeals. The KGB has a lot more teams to compete against."
The Shootfighter: "I know."
Judge Death: "Then let us go and meet Fierce."
(They leave as the scene slowly fades to black.)
(The Hardkore World Cameraman is walking up the steps in the empty arena. he continues through the nosebleed seats until he sees a pale figure dressed in black leather. He reaches Vampira who is eating her meal.)
Vampira: "I thought you'd never get here. Imagine all this waiting and I got hungry so I decided to eat something before the ringsiders actually begin to enter this arena. Sit down and have a bite."
(The Hardkore World Cameraman reluctantly sits down.)
Vampira: "Don't worry I won't bite you."
(She lets out a hissing laugh.)
Vampira: "Please I was just joking. Why would I want to bite you. I'm already full from this meal I was eating. You're probably here to ask me about my opponent Tamara Sanchez."
(The Hardkore World Cameraman nods.)
Vampira: "Well she probably thought she was going to exit her favorite kind of match the champion. Then after she loses she realizes that she was the chump. She and everyone else were taking bets on how long I would last. What a bunch of losers especially Turner and Sanchez when they put big money into the betting pool and I lasted longer than they would have and in fact survived into the third cage despite losing the match."
(She smiles mischieviously.)
Vampira: "Oh Tamara I'm so sorry I had to collect from you and the rest of the women. I gave Microshocker his back since I don't accept play money. Wait that was Phil Blauer's too. Oh well I just enjoyed embarrassing them all."
(Vampira's smile broadens.)
Vampira: "Anyway back to Tamara. Yes we'll be having our third go around one on one. This time I shall be more aggressive and I shall be even more meaner and bloodthirsty than ever before. This match shall make my meal look like a small snack. Believe me the significance of this match is quite high. The winner gets the No. 1 Contender's spot and I shall be that individual."
(Vampira's expression grows serious.)
Vampira: "Yes Tamara I plan to beat you for the top spot to challenge Anj Turner. Besides, someone new should be the champion not the same old champions. Then again if I beat you and the Turner I would be joining them too. Still it would be quite refresshing to see a real true specimen of a woman win the title. I may even let you get a shot Tamara if Jonnie Valentine allows it. So tonight we'll go into the match with such determination and savagery. That one of us shall be bleeding real badly. Guess who it's going to be and it's not me."
(Vampira's face grows dark.)
Vampira: "So you'll be wishing you took whatever I say seriously, since you thought I was boring. Well tonight I'll show you how boring you are and how much I shall shut you up. Darkness descends and I shall rule!"
(The Hardkore World Cameraman screams as she lunges hissing and baring her teeth as the camera suddenly goes black.)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Coming up is the last match in the first round.
Phil Blauer: Finally, between this and the Shootfighter promos, you got a mother fucker havin' to pee.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Why didn't you go between matches, that's when Taz does it.
Phil Blauer: Yeah, but Cole holds the cup for him and you're being a dick about it.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Coming up we have former Hardkore World Champion James Fierce & former Hardkore West Coast Champion The Shootfighter vs. The Microshocker & Bad Boy King Kong.
Phil Blauer: That's a lot of gold on that side, plus The Shock just had an impressive non-loss in Hardkore Nippon.
"Renegades of Funk" by Rage Against the Machine plays and the audience cheers as Judge Death & Vampira lead The Shootfighter & James Fierce down to the ring. Fierce holds both SWAT Carribean title belts over his shoulders, while The Shootfighter weilds a stainless steel singapore cane
Guillermo O'Bannon: This is James Fierce's first match since he lost his Hardkore World Heavyweight Championship to Robert Hunglestien III in Portland in that thrilling match with only four seconds to spare.
Phil Blauer: It will go down as one of the classic Hardkore World Heavyweight Title Matches of all time.
Guillermo O'Bannon: The Shootfighter is also the only competitor in this tournament who knew Frank Marano Jr. personally. He's dedicating this tournament to his memory. Fierce usually teams with Soutter. They've held numerous World Tag Team titles together including in UCW. But tonight he teams with The Shootfighter, a change of pace to be sure. But The Shootfighter is one of the stiffest workers in the locker room, and definately someone I would like to have in my corner.
Phil Blauer: When will you understand that no one will ever be in your corner? Ever?
Yolanda Ando: That's mean. James Fierce is in a traditional wrestling singlet. The singlet is red at the top and transitions into black towards the thighs. On the back of the singlet the letters “KGB” are written in black. Fierce wears a black and red warm up jacket that has "Bandits" written on the left breast and "Fierce" underneath. He carries both SWAT Carribean singles titles on either shoulder. The Shootfighter wears knee length black wrestling tights, black wrestling boots, sharp studded forearm pads and a tight black robe with a red dragon on the back and wields a stainless steel singapore cane. Judge Death wears a Salem witch trial style wig & robe, a gargoyles mask and black boots & wields a cane with a gargoyles head on it.
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "The following is the last first round match in the Frank A. Marano Jr. Memorial Cup. It is scheduled for one fall with a 30 minute time limit. Your referee is Mike Peters. Featuring first, representing Hardkore America; Accompanied to the ring by Judge Death & Vampira; First from Bangkok, Thailand; Standing 5 feet 11 inches tall; Weighing 235 pounds...THE SHOOTFIGHTER!! His partner is from Washington, D.C but originally from West by gawd Virginia; Standing 6 feet 3 inches tall; Weighing 255 pounds; He is The Current SWAT Carribean Bermuda Triangle Champion & SWAT Carribean Heavyweight Champion...'THE FEROCIOUS BANDIT' JAMES FIERCE!! They are THE K.G.B.!!!"
The Palm Springs crowd roars then The Linux start up theme plays over and over again in an annoying loop which forces the fans to cover their ears with their hands. The Microshocker steps out to bask in the jeers with Bad Boy King Kong following behind him, carrying Mr.Computer
Guillermo O'Bannon: The Microshocker looking forward to getting in the ring with The Shootfighter again. They've feuded on & off for nearly a decade! He's been on a roll lately. The Microshocker recently won a Fans Bring Their Own Weapons rumble in Melbourne, Australia at the SWAT pay-per-view entitled New Year's Nightmare, recieving a shot at SWAT World Death Match Champion Reverend Cornelius Marsh. He lost that match to Marsh in Utah but in Joetsu, Japan he went to a time limit draw with former HFW World Heavyweight Champion Akira Kyoto.
Yolanda Ando: The Microshocker wearing a shimmering silver bodysuit with the ass cut out. Bad Boy King Kong wears really tight jeans and a black sleeveless shirt.
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "And their opponents represent Hardkore Nippon; Featuring first from The Smokey Mountains; Standing 6 feet 5 inches tall; Weighing 451 pounds...BAD BOY KING KONG!! His partner is from Seattle, Washington; Standing 6 feet; Weighing 200 pounds...THE MICROSHOCKER!!
Hardkore Hall boos. Mike Peters signals for the bell and James Fierce and Bad Boy King Kong elect to start out. Kong & Fierce lock up
Guillermo O'Bannon: Bad Boy King Kong getting the advantage in the collar & elbow tie-up, but then James Fierce wrenches his arm over in an armbar. Fierce applies pressure to Kong's bent elbow.
Bad Boy King Kong hiptosses Fierce over by his armbarred arm, but Fierce hangs on with the armbar. Kong pulls him up again and irish whips him into the ropes by his armbarred arm
Guillermo O'Bannon: James Fierce comes back and gets caught by a 451 pound sidewalk slam!!
Bad Boy King Kong runs into the ropes and then drops a massive elbow into James Fierce's chest
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(James Fierce kicks out)
Phil Blauer: We're barely a minute into this match and Bad Boy King Kong is already getting a two count! That was a powerful sidewalk slam.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Bad Boy King Kong fireman's carries Fierce up, but James lands on his feet behind him. He hits Kong in the neck with a martial arts strike that sends him to his knees.
Phil Blauer: Similar to the Vulcan nerve pinch.
James Fierce stands behind Bad Boy King Kong facing him. James Fierce grabs one of Kong's arms and pulls it behind his back. Fierce pulls up on Bad Boy King Kong's forearm applying pressure to his elbow and shoulder. From there Fierce steps over the Bad Boy King Kong's shoulder opposite the one in the armlock so it appears they are sitting facing away from him while reaching through his own legs keeping Kong in the hammerlock. James Fierce grabs the arm squatting over with his free arm and wraps his arm around it, pulling up to applying pressure to Bad Boy King Kong's arm
Guillermo O'Bannon: James Fierce with a hammerlock with a stepover armbar! James Fierce is squatting over Bad Boy King Kong's shoulder with one of his hands reaching through Kong's legs holding him in a hammerlock and behind Bad Boy King Kong's near arm, which James Fierce has wrapped up with their other arm.
Phil Blauer: I'm lost.
Guillermo O'Bannon: James Fierce almost has his arms crossed while keeping Bad Boy King Kong's arms locked. Mike Peters checks in to see if Kong wants to tap out.
Phil Blauer: He doesn't have any arms to tap with!
James Fierce lets go to tag in The Shootfighter. The Shootfighter takes over with a keylock on Bad Boy King Kong's arm. He wrenches up on Kong's arm, making him howl in pain
Guillermo O'Bannon: The Shootfighter wearing down the big man's arm with that keylock. He pulls him up into a snap suplex! He pops his hips and pulls him up into a second snap suplex. A third one completes The Three Amigos, but Bad Boy King Kong's too heavy and reverses with a textbook suplex!
Bad Boy King Kong bounces into the ropes and crushes his chest with an earthquake splash!! Mike Peters slides into position
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(The Shootfighter rolls Bad Boy King Kong back into a sunset flip)
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(Bad Boy King Kong claps his legs together on The Shootfighter's head)
Guillermo O'Bannon: The Shootfighter fires back with some muy thai punches to Bad Boy King Kong's face, busting his nose!
He tags in James Fierce. Bad Boy King Kong is face down on the mat, James Fierce stands over his upper back. Fierce reaches under one of Kong's arms and locks his hands together. James Fierce then falls to the side opposite the arm he grabbed. Fierce is lying on his side and Kong is on his back, one of James' legs is under Kong's upper back and hooking his free arm. James Fierce's lower leg is in the free hand's arm pit and hooking the arm, with Fierce's foot. James Fierce throws his other leg over Bad Boy King Kong's trapped arm and then behind Kong's neck
Guillermo O'Bannon: Stranglehold Beta on Bad Boy King Kong! James Fierce's leg is pushing Bad Boy King Kong's neck forward and driving his chin into his chest. James Fierce pulls Bad Boy King Kong's arm out straight across Fierce's torso, trying to hyper extend his elbow.
Phil Blauer: Mike Peters asks Kong if he wants to tap, and Kong looks to be mulling it over.
Guillermo O'Bannon: The K.G.B. wearing down Bad Boy King Kong's arm in a team effort. Fierce yanks on Kong's arm again, making him howl. James Fierce turns it into a crippler crossface!
The audience cheers as James Fierce links his fingers together and pulls up on Bad Boy King Kong's head & arm. Bad Boy King Kong growls out refusals to submit to Mike Peters
Guillermo O'Bannon: James Fierce has the crippler crossface in tight...but The Microshocker runs in and punt kicks Fierce in the face! Bad Boy King Kong grabs Fierce and chokeslams him with his good arm!
Hardkore Hall boos. Bad Boy King Kong gets up to the second rope and then comes crashing down on Fierce's ribs with a 451 pound splash
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(James Fierce kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Kong backs James Fierce back with several knife edge chops into the corner. He tags in The Microshocker. The Shock scoops James Fierce up and bodyslams him. The Microshocker moves in for the kill with a Shocker Toehold Facelock, STF!
The Shock lifts up on Fierce's head & neck, choking him out. Fierce reaches out for the ropes but The Microshocker has him locked tight. Mike Peters asking Fierce if he wants to give up
Guillermo O'Bannon: James Fierce finally gets over the ropes and grabs hold. Peters forces a break of the STF. The Microshocker goes for a piledriver, but James Fierce backdrops him over! He irish whips The Shock into the ropes and spinebusters him!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(The Microshocker kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: James Fierce slams The Microshocker into the mat with a uranage! He pulls him up by the arm and pulls him in with a shortarm lariot!
James Fierce tags in The Shootfighter. The Shootfighter grabs The Microshocker from behind with a german suplex
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(The Microshocker rolls his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: The Shootfighter pulls him up in a powerbomb, but The Microshocker takes him over in a huracanrana! The Microshocker moves in for the kill, but The Shootfighter hits him low!
The fans cheer as The Microshocker tips over to one side. The Shootfighter waits for The Shock to get up. When he does Shootfighter rushes him with a russian sickle, but The Microshocker ducks
Guillermo O'Bannon: The Shootfighter rushes him again, but The Microshocker catches him with a powerslam! The Microshocker climbs to the top turnbuckle and comes off with an earthquake splash!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(The Shootfighter gets his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: The Microshocker tags in Bad Boy King Kong. Kong applies a cobra clutch on The Shootfighter. He pulls back on Shootfighter's arm while applying pressure to the back of his neck.
Phil Blauer: The Shootfighter's legs are getting rubbery! Like my rubbers.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Bad Boy King Kong irish whips The Shootfighter into the ropes and catches him on the way back with a powerslam!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(The Shootfighter kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Kong pulls Shootfighter up by the ponytail, but Shootfighter comes up swinging with a few heart punches.
Phil Blauer: Kong's got a lot of heart to punch. But most of it is clogged with half a Whopper.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Shootfighter then fires into his chest with a series of dragon claw strikes. The Shootfighter chops Bad Boy King Kong down to size with some knife edges that back him into the corner.
The Shootfighter tags James Fierce in. Fierce bulldogs Bad Boy King Kong out of the corner. He rolls him over then stands behind his head facing towards him. James Fierce lifts up Kong's arm and places one of his legs around the side of Bad Boy King Kong's head and bends his leg so his calf is under Kong's chin. James Fierce locks his leg in place with his other leg so his legs are forming a "4" around Bad Boy King Kong' head
Guillermo O'Bannon: The Triangle Hold!! James Fierce applies pressure with his legs, cutting off the supply of blood to the brain of Bad Boy King Kong. James Fierce also pulls back on Bad Boy King Kong's arm so it is between Fierce's legs. It's a combination of a Leg Lock Sleeper Hold and a Crucifix Armbar. Mike Peters checks in as Bad Boy King Kong screams bloody murder!
The Microshocker runs in and kicks James Fierce in the face, breaking up The Triangle Hold. Bad Boy King Kong rolls over to his side, clutching his elbow to his body. He staggers up and lifts James Fierce in a fireman's carry
Guillermo O'Bannon: A 451 pound samoan drop!! Bad Boy King Kong struggles to get to the second turnbuckle than comes off with a devastating elbow to James Fierce's chest!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(James Fierce kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Bad Boy King Kong gives Fierce a spinning toe hold then drops back into a figure four leglock! Those trunklike legs can snap Fierce's like a twig.
Phil Blauer: Well do it then. Do it. Do it.
Guillermo O'Bannon: James Fierce reaching out to the ropes which are so close yet so far.
Fierce grabbing at air as Bad Boy King Kong clamps down on his bent knee. Bad Boy King Kong reaches out and tags in The Microshocker. The Shock climbs to the top turnbuckle
Guillermo O'Bannon: The Microshocker frog splashes James Fierce's twisted legs while Bad Boy King Kong holds them in a figure four!!
Fierce rolls around the mat, clutching his kneecap. The Palm Springs fans boo as The Shock places James' foot on the bottom rope and then climbs to the top rope again
Guillermo O'Bannon: The Microshocker comes off the top with an elbow to James Fierce's extended leg! Fierce seems to be in heaps of pain and is straining to tag in The Shootfighter.
The audience claps faster & faster, rooting Fierce on to tag in The Shootfighter. The Microshocker flips James Fierce over his shoulder in a powerbomb, but Fierce rolls out of it and lands on his feet in front of The Shock
Guillermo O'Bannon: James Fierce gives The Microshocker a lo-down spinebuster!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(The Microshocker claps his legs together on Fierce's head)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Fierce grabs The Shock by the leg and karate chops him behind the knee. He whips him over into a dragon screw then tags in The Shootfighter. He applies an ankle lock on The Microshocker. He stands over The Shock wrenching his foot from side to side.
Mike Peters asks The Microshocker if he wants to submit, but he shakes his head. The Shootfighter wraps his legs around The Shock's thigh and drops to the mat, with his ankle firmly in The Shootfighter Anklelock
Guillermo O'Bannon: The Microshocker kicks him off, and then knees The Shootfighter in the stomach. The Microshocker gives The Shootfighter an F2 neckbreaker!
The Microshocker pulls Shootfighter's head into his legs and then piledrives him into the mat! The crowd boos as The Shock hooks his leg
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(The Shootfighter kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: The Microshocker limps into the ropes and goes for a kneedrop, but The Shootfighter rolls out of the way! The Shootfighter applies a figure four leglock!
The Microshocker animatedly sits up and back down over & over, trying to escape the figure four. The Shootfighter demands that he submit while the front row of the audience slaps the railing, chanting "TAP!! TAP!! TAP!! TAP!! TAP!!" Mike Peters crouches over him, asking him if he wants to give up
Guillermo O'Bannon: Bad Boy King Kong can't take anymore, and enters the ring. He breaks up the figure four with some stomps, but James Fierce comes in and knocks him out of the ring with a clothesline! The Shootfighter whacks The Shock's knees & ankles with a barrage of muy thai kicks.
The Shootfighter tags in James Fierce. Fierce sets The Microshocker up in a leg capture suplex, but then drops to his knees shooting his shoulder through the back of The Microshocker's knee
Guillermo O'Bannon: James Fierce applies a single leg boston crab on The Microshocker's aching leg. He rocks back on The Shock's leg, hyperextending the knee.
Phil Blauer: Bad Boy King Kong knows how much The Microshocker needs those knees. He spends most of his time on them.
Guillermo O'Bannon: James Fierce plants his foot and yanks back on The Microshocker's calf, but The Shock trips him up and breaks the half crab. He slams Fierce into the mat with a uranage he calls The Shockbottom!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(James Fierce kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: The Microshocker lifts James Fierce up in a hanging suplex, then drills him headfirst with an F3 Brainbuster!!
The Microshocker pulls his head into his legs, then flips him into a dominator!! The audience jeers and boos and Bad Boy King Kong gets tagged in
Guillermo O'Bannon: Bad Boy King Kong gut wrenches James Fierce up into a tigerbomb!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(James Fierce claps his legs together on Kong's head)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Bad Boy King Kong climbs to the second rope and comes off with an earthquake splash to James Fierce's riblets!!
Referee Mike Peters: 1...2...(The Shootfighter smacks Kong in the face with a muy thai kick)
Phil Blauer: You can hear his teeth rattling back here!!
Guillermo O'Bannon: James Fierce applies a rings of saturn to Bad Boy King Kong's arms!! All the abuse Kong's arms have been taking could pay off here! The Microshocker hobbles in to interfere again but The Shootfighter hits him with an angle slam!
James Fierce tags in The Shootfighter who applies an crippler crossface STF on Bad Boy King Kong. He pulls up on Kong's head & arm as James Fierce batters The Microshocker with european forearms
Guillermo O'Bannon: Bad Boy King Kong is nowhere near the ropes and The Shootfighter has the crossface locked in tight!
Phil Blauer: The fat man taps! The fat man taps! The fat man taps!
"Renegades of Funk" by Rage Against the Machine plays as the Palm Springs audience erupts
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "At 19 minutes 12 seconds; THE WINNERS OF THE MATCH, ADVANCING TO THE SECOND ROUND...THE K.G.B.!!!"
Guillermo O'Bannon: The first time teaming of James Fierce and The Shootfighter is successful! They go on to the second round to take on Praised or Persecuted. Speaking of the second round, this is how it's gonna go.
Andrew Sinclair & "The Saikyo Terrorist" Tatsuya Arakawa (Hardkore America)
vs.
The Un-Stable Andrew Karnage & Adrian Tanner Jr. (Hardkore America)
The Cupcake Crew Death Gojira & Tuxedo Mask (Hardkore America)
vs.
Rated X & Soutter (Hardkore America)
L.S.D. Lucifer Jones & "The Punisher" Dan Stein (Hardkore America)
vs.
Lonewolf McNeely & Robert Hunglestien III (Hardkore America)
Platinum Sensationalists "Platinum" Pat Bozzini & "The Sensational" Shawn Styles (GCW)
vs.
Legendary Fantastic Jester & The Fantastic One (USWF)
"The Mummy Commando" Genity Howard & Syberus (SWAT Australia)
vs.
Kilroy Evans & Sun (Hardkore America)
The Heart Throbs Rich Andrews & "Magnificent" Ron Lauren (Hardkore America)
vs.
The Devine Comedy Bob Lancelot & Dark Schnitzel (TKOW)
J.C. South and Captain Jonathan Jones (Independent)
vs.
Shingo & Masato (SWAT Rocky Mountains)
Praised or Persecuted Outrider & “The Infamous” Michael Hunter (GCW)
vs.
The KGB James Fierce & The Shootfighter (Hardkore America)
RPing will continue through this entire tournament. Second round will begin being posted tomorrow, so get those RPs in.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Ok fans, now it's time for the second round. These next elite eight teams will recieve a first round bye which will put the winner of this bracket at a distinct advantage over the winner of the next bracket. The first match is a match that has been the most talked about of the tournament. Andrew Sinclair, Adrian Tanner Jr., and Andrew Sinclair used to be in a stable...
Phil Blauer: Known as Triple A. Their babyface gimmick was to pick up stranded old ladies and help them change tires and get their doors open when they lock their keys inside. They turned heel by telling you such services weren't covered under your particular plan.
Guillermo O'Bannon: No, known as The Un-Stable. After Robert Hunglestien III left the group, Andrew Sinclair left as well.
Phil Blauer: Yes, he lost his zeal for life?
Guillermo O'Bannon: His zeal?
Phil Blauer: Yes, his zeal. His zest, his zip. With out Bobby Hunglow, Sinclair felt he couldn't leave up to the leader role. You see, Andy Sin and I are tight, like brothers. Or paisans. Amigos...
Guillermo O'Bannon: Get to the point, Phil. Jason the audio guy wants to play Arakawa's music.
Phil Blauer: He told me that the brief amount of time that Karnage, Kilroy, and Tanner looked to him as their leader, he wasn't his usual cheerful self.
Jason the audio guy gets tired of waiting and plays "Bomb Idea" by Mad Capsule Markets. The fans boo as Andrew Sinclair and "The Saikyo Terrorist" Tatsuya Arakawa walk out with Tom Lux
Guillermo O'Bannon: Andrew Sinclair & Tatsuya Arakawa are the #1 seeded team of this tournament, which is quite an accomplishment considering the 24 tandems of top wrestlers in this thing. But in order for that to mean anything, they have to get past two of the top tag team wrestlers in the World.
Yolanda Ando: Tatsuya Arakawa wears blood red biker MMA style tights with Japanese lettering for "Saikyo Terrorist" on the rear in black, high below the knee black boots, black TRACE kneepads, black wrist tape, and wears a "Tatsuya Arakawa - SAIKYO KENKA MICHI" t-shirt to the ring. The Hardkore Nippon Brass Knuckles title belt is strapped around his waist. Sinclair walks down to the ring wearing his wrestling trunks under a knee-length black and white Kobashi-style velvet robe. He also wears a black head band that trails down to his waist. Before entering the ring, he drops the robe and headband, revealing a long sleeve black t-shirt with the words "Straight Shooter" on the front and "Internationally Infamous" on the back in silver. He wears black bicycle-short-style wrestling trunks that have a stylized white revolver emblazoned across the ass.
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "The following second round tag team match scheduled for one fall and a 30 minute time limit. Your referee is Ron Reid. Featuring first representing Hardkore America; Accompanied to the ring by Tom Lux; First from Shimo-tsuga-gun, Tochigi, Japan; Standing 6 feet 4 inches tall; Weighing 264 pounds; He is The Current HARDKORE NIPPON BRASS KNUCKLES CHAMPION...'THE SAIKYO TERRORIST' TATSUYA ARAKAWA!! His partner is from Sacramento, California; Standing 6 feet 3 inches tall; Weighing 228 pounds...'THE STRAIGHT SHOOTER' ANDREW SINCLAIR!!
The fans boo. Andrew Sinclair drops his shirt and starts stretching on the ropes. "I'm the One" by Static-X plays and the fans erupt. Andrew Karnage steps through the curtain with Adrian Tanner Jr. and they slap the Palm Springs fans' hands on the way down to the ring. Adrian raises his arms, throws his head back, and thousands of multicolered streamers shoot simultaniously from all four corners of the ring. Adrian takes off his ring jacket and slides into the ring. In the ring, Adrian mounts the nearest turnbuckle, making the "gun" motion with left hand. He "cocks" and "fires," and then jumps down
Phil Blauer: Oh, almost got me. I'm kidding of course, I'm fine, fans.
Guillermo O'Bannon: These two are the top tag team wrestlers in the World teaming up. Could it be like Arn & Eaton?
Phil Blauer: Or Jannety & Stan Lane?
Guillermo O'Bannon: While both of these guys are known primarily for their tag team accomplishments, Andrew Karnage is a former Xtreme World Wrestling League Heavyweight Champion, Ultra Wrestling Confederacy World Champion, World Wrestling On-Line World Champion, IWA Deathmatch Champion, and IWA International Champion. Adrian Tanner Jr. is a former Ring Syndicate Australian Heavyweight Champion, Ring Syndicate Australian Statewide Champion, Unified SWAT Australian Statewide Champion, CWA Television Champion.
Yolanda Ando: Andrew Karnage wears black knee length basketball shorts with AK-47 down the outsides of each leg in dark red. Dark red kneepads, and black calf high boots with red laces, and has a black elbow supporter on his right elbow. The Hardkore World Six man Tag Team title belt is strapped around his waist. Adrian Tanner Jr. wears metallic blue shorts with "AT" in shiny red lettering on the sides. He holds the SWAT World Tag Team title belt over his right shoulder and his Hardkore World Six Man Tag Team title belt over his other.
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "Their opponents represent Hardkore America; Featuring first, from Orem, Utah; Standing 6 feet 5 inches tall; Weighing 263 pounds...ANDREW KARNAGE!! His partner is from Tucson, Arizona; Standing 6 feet 2 inches tall; Weighing 227 pounds; He is One Half of the SWAT World Tag Team Champions...ADRIAN TANNER JR.!! They are Two Thirds of the HARDKORE WORLD SIX MAN TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS...THE UN-STABLE!!
The fans cheer Tanner & Karnage. Ron Reid signals for the bell and Adrian Tanner Jr. & Andrew Sinclair leave the ring
Guillermo O'Bannon: Tatsuya Arakawa opens with a wild flurry of punches to Andrew Karnage's face, and the AK-47 backs into the corner. Arakawa lays into him with a series of vicious chops.
Karnage fires back with a few chops of his own and tosses Arakawa into the corner. He cracks Arakawa with a couple stiff vader forearm smashes that drops him into a sitting position
Guillermo O'Bannon: Andrew Karnage bootscrapes Arakawa's face a few times then twists into a facewash! He grabs Arakawa by the hair and headbutts the back of his head several times. Arakawa responds with a uraken spinning backhand. He tags in Andrew Sinclair.
Arakawa & Sinclair back Andrew Karnage into the corner and switch off with stiff kicks to Karnage's stomach. Andrew Sinclair tosses him across the ring with a karelin lift
Guillermo O'Bannon: Andrew Sinclair northern lights suplexes Andrew Karnage!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...(Andrew Karnage lifts his shoulder)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sinclair tosses Karnage over his shoulder with a rolling ipponzei judo throw. He lifts Karnage in a fireman's carry, but Karnage falls on his feet behind Sinclair. Sambo suplex by the AK-47!
The Palm Springs fans come alive! Andrew Karnage applies a masterlock to the back of Sinclair's neck and then starts spinning him round & round
Phil Blauer: I think I'm gonna be sick...
Guillermo O'Bannon: Andrew Karnage lets Andrew Sinclair drop to the mat! Karnage runs into the ropes, but Sinclair ducks underneath the Nightmare Lariot! German suplex by The Straight Shooter!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Andrew Karnage rolls his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Andrew Sinclair tags in Tatsuya Arakawa. Sinclair atomic drops Andrew Karnage on the top turnbuckle, and then pulls him upside down into a tree of woe. Arakawa & Sinclair get a running start and double baseball slide kick Karnage in the head!!
The audience reacts with an "OH!!!" and Karnage falls to the mat, his leg twitching slightly. Arakawa irish whips Andrew Karnage into the ropes and catches him in the chest with a yakuza kick
Guillermo O'Bannon: Arakawa front facelocks Karnage, but Karnage lifts him up into a fireman's carry. He runs into the center of the ring with a death valley driver!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Tatsuya Arakawa kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Andrew Karnage lifts Arakawa up in a chokeslam then drops him on his knee in a Choke-Breaker!!
Karnage goes over to his corner to tag in Adrian Tanner Jr., but Arakawa catches him by the foot and applies an ankle lock with a heel hold. Arakawa wrenches Karnage's foot to the side
Phil Blauer: Karnage was almost able to tag out. But like my last girlfriend told me "Close isn't gonna get me to leave my husband you limp dick loser."
Yolanda Ando: Ok, I was a little drunk.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Arakawa twists Karnage's ankle and tries to break it. Karnage rolls over on to his back, and kicks Arakawa off. He irish whips Arakawa into the ropes, and belly to belly suplexes him over his head!
Andrew Karnage tags in Adrian Tanner Jr. and Hardkore Hall explodes. Andrew Karnage atomic drops Arakawa on the top turnbuckle, facing the audience. Adrian Tanner Jr. climbs to the second turnbuckle behind Arakawa. Tanner backdrop superplexes Arakawa onto Karnage's knee
Guillermo O'Bannon: The double team manuever they call YOU DIE NOW!!
Phil Blauer: A great way for Karnage to blow out his knee.
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Tatsuya Arakawa kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Adrian Tanner Jr. armdrags Tatsuya Arakawa over into an armbar. He clamps down on Arakawa's bent elbow, trying to pull his shoulder out of it's socket.
Tanner sticks his knee into Arakawa's shoulder, pulling up on his arm. He turns it into a headlock on the mat. He grinds his forearm into Arakawa's temple. He presses Arakawa's shoulder to the mat
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Tatsuya Arakawa rolls him into a cradle)
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Adrian Tanner Jr. kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Tatsuya Arakawa snap mares Tanner over and tags him with two roundhouse kicks to his spine. He kneels behin him and applies a stretch plum! He pulls back on the head & arm of Adrian Tanner Jr., while the fans here in Hardkore Hall let him have it.
Adrian Tanner tries to rake Arakawa's eyes but he can't reach. Arakawa wrenches back on his head again just for trying. Arakawa rolls over top of him and applies a kneeling wakigatame. Arakawa yanks back on Tanner's extended arm, trying to tear his shoulder
Guillermo O'Bannon: Adrian Tanner Jr. trapped in that wakigatame armbar, reaching out towards the ropes. Tatsuya Arakawa pulls him back down into a jujigatame cross armbar. He rows back on Tanner's extended arm, trying to hyperextend his elbow.
Ron Reid asks Tanner if he wants to submit but he shakes his head no. Arakawa rows back on his arm one more time and then tags in Andrew Sinclair. They both grab an arm a piece and apply a double jujigatame armbar
Guillermo O'Bannon: Ron Reid lays in the count and makes Sinclair & Arakawa break it at five. Sinclair remains and hangs on to his jujigatame. He rows back on Adrian Tanner Jr.'s arm.
Tanner stomps his feet into the mat in pain. Sinclair sits up, smiles at Adrian and falls back again on his arm. Tanner gets to his feet, and so does Sinclair. He drops down into a fujiwara armbar on Adrian
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sinclair pulls up on Tanner's shoulder & exposed elbow. Tanner cries out in pain, as Sinclair tries to get him to tap out with the wakigatame! Tanner rolls forward and kicks Sinclair in the face. Tanner takes to the skies with a dropkick!
The fans cheer. Adrian Tanner Jr. front facelocks Sinclair and climbs up to the second turnbuckle. Tanner tornado DDTs Sinclair! He hooks Sinclair's leg
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Andrew Sinclair kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Adrian Tanner Jr. irish whips Sinclair into the ropes, but Sinclair comes back with a running boot to the face! He tags in Tatsuya Arakawa. They both lie out Adrian Tanner's arms out while he's on his stomach. Arakawa & Sinclair double kneedrop the backs of his elbows.
Tatsuya Arakawa grabs Tanner around the waist with a deadlift german suplex! Tanner is folded like an accordian, Tatsuya Arakawa pulls him up by the hair and hits him with a high kick to head
Guillermo O'Bannon: Arakawa slaps Tanner in the face with a left then another slap with his right hand. Tatsuya Arakawa tags him with a spinning chop, then he kicks him in the ribs. Arakawa bounces off the ropes and hits him with a yakuza kick!
Arakawa irish whips Tanner into the ropes, but he comes back with a flying body press
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Tatsuya Arakawa rolls him over)
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Adrian Tanner Jr. kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Arakawa gets to his feet, but Tanner trips him with a drop toe hold that pitches him throatfirst into the second rope! Arakawa staggers up and Adrian Tanner lifts him up into a brainbuster!
Andrew Karnage climbs to the second turnbuckle, and Adrian Tanner Jr. atomic drops Arakawa's legs onto Karnage's shoulders. Karnage jumps off with a black tiger bomb!! Adrian Tanner Jr. climbs to the top turnbuckle
Guillermo O'Bannon: Adrian Tanner Jr. flips off into a Wake Up Call 450 legdrop!!
Phil Blauer: Who flipped me off?
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Tatsuya Arakawa kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Andrew Karnage double underhooks his arms and lifts him up into a Tiger Buster!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Tatsuya Arakawa kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Andrew Karnage begs Arakawa to get up and when he does, Andrew Karnage drops him on his head with a wrist-clutch fisherman's buster!!
Karnage pulls him up into a waistlock, but Arakawa back elbows him. He tattoos him with a rolling solebutt kick! Tatsuya Arakawa climbs up to the second turnbuckle
Guillermo O'Bannon: "The Saikyo Terrorist" Tatsuya Arakawa kneedrops Karnage in the chest from the second rope!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Andrew Karnage kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Arakawa irish whips him into the ropes, but Karnage ducks under a clothesline. He hooks on a kataha-jime and drops Arakawa on his skull with a brainbuster!!
The audience erupts. Karnage tags in Adrian Tanner Jr. who climbs to the top turnbuckle. Andrew Karnage lifts Arakawa up in a powerbomb, but Tanner backflips into a moonsault reverse DDT off of Karnage's shoulders
Guillermo O'Bannon: Blind Man's Bluff!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...thr- (Andrew Sinclair stomps Tanner's back)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Adrian Tanner Jr. german suplexes Tatsuya Arakawa!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Tatsuya Arakawa gets his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Adrian Tanner goes for a huracanrana, but Arakawa reverses it and high angle MASSIVE powerbombs him!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Adrian Tanner Jr. kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Tatsuya Arakawa lifts Tanner up on his shoulders in a fireman's carry, but then drops his face on his shoulder with the Go 2 Sleep!!
Tanner rolls around the mat clutching his face. He gets up and tries to kick Arakawa, but he catches Tanner's boot. Tanner swings around with an enzuigiri kick! The fans cheer wildly, and he tags in Andrew Karnage
Guillermo O'Bannon: Karnage flips Arakawa over in a gory special and leans forward, Tanner hooks his head and hits a roll the dice neckbreaker as Karnage swings with Tatsuya and drops them with a swinging gory bomb!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Tatsuya Arakawa kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Andrew Karnage flips Arakawa over in an exploder '98! Karnage irish whips Arakawa into the ropes, but Arakawa comes back with a jumping knee attack right under his chin!
Hardkore Hall boos. Tatsuya Arakawa irish whips Karnage into the turnbuckles. He grabs Karnage's hair, then throws some high muay thai style kneelifts to the stomach, and ends the combo with a kneelift to jaw
Guillermo O'Bannon: Karnage comes out of the corner and grabs Arakawa around the neck and flips him over into a head & arm suplex!
The fans cheer. Arakawa stands up and ducks under a forearm, and backdrop drivers Karnage onto the back of his head! Arakawa tags in Andrew Sinclair. Arakawa hits Karnage with a left roundhouse kick to the face while Sinclair does a left roundhouse kick to the back of the head
Guillermo O'Bannon: Requiem for a CroCop!!
Phil Blauer: I miss the Bruno Nelson.
Guillermo O'Bannon: Andrew Sinclair lifts Karnage up into a fireman's carry and then drills him on the top of his head with a death valley driver!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Andrew Karnage kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sinclair waistlocks Karnage, but Karnage back elbows him. He scoops Sinclair up and swings him around into a catatonic backbreaker!
Andrew Karnage turns Sinclair over into a single leg boston crab! He yanks back on the leg, but stands on the back of Sinclair's head. Ron Reid checks in to see if he wants to tap out
Guillermo O'Bannon: Karnage leans as far back as he can with Sinclair's leg, then stomps the back of his head! Tatsuya Arakawa runs into the ring and blasts Karnage in the chest with a stiff kick! Sinclair staggers up to his feet, and wheelbarrow suplexes him!
The Palm Springs fans boo Sinclair as he climbs up to the top turnbuckle. Andrew Karnage springs to life and flips him over into an owendriver iconoclasm
Guillermo O'Bannon: Spinal Fusion Driver!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...thr-(Andrew Sinclair gets his foot on the bottom rope)
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "Twenty Minutes Have Elapsed. 10 Minutes Remaining."
Guillermo O'Bannon: Andrew Karnage tags in Adrian Tanner Jr., who climbs to the apron. Karnage flips Sinclair forward as Tanner hits him with a springboard missle dropkick!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Andrew Sinclair kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Adrian Tanner grabs Sinclair by the hair and tosses him over the ropes to the floor below! He slingshots himself onto the middle of the top rope and hits Sinclair in the face with a springboard senton!!
The crowd erupts in cheers. Adrian Tanner climbs back up onto the top turnbuckle, and flips off into a corkscrew 180 bodypress on Sinclair on the floor!! The Palm Springs fans chant "TAN-NER!! TAN-NER!! TAN-NER!! TAN-NER!! TAN-NER!!"
Guillermo O'Bannon: Adrian Tanner Jr. climbs up to the apron but is blindsided by a stiff shot from Tatsuya Arakawa. Arakawa DDTs him off the apron to the concrete below!!
The audience boos as Tanner lies there in a pool of his own blood. Tatsuya Arakawa helps Andrew Sinclair to his feet. Sinclair slams Tanner's spine into the guardrail with a uranage
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sinclair rolls Tanner back into the ring and climbs to the top turnbuckle! He flies off in a Bombs Away kneedrop but Tanner rolls out of the way!!
The crowd roars as Sinclair rolls around clutching his kneecap. Adrian Tanner Jr. capitalizes with a fisherman's suplex
Guillermo O'Bannon: The Sure Shot!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...thr- (Andrew Sinclair kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: A bloody Adrian Tanner Jr. tags in Andrew Karnage. Tanner smacks Sinclair upside the head with The Daytripper superkick and Karnage nails him in the back of the head with a Nightmare Lariot!! Nightmare Trip!
Phil Blauer: That's nothing like my 9 hour flight with the cast of Skating with Celebrities!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...thr- (Tatsuya Arakawa stomps Karnage's head)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Andrew Karnage lifts Sinclair up on his shoulders into a human torture rack, bending his spine across his massive shoulders. He drops down to his knees into a derailer! Karnage stands back up and racks Sinclair's back again.
Karnage bounces Sinclair's back across his shoulders for a while and then swings him around into a hangman's neckbreaker!! Karnage pulls him up for a suplex, but Sinclair blocks it with his calf
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sinclair reverses with a hanging vertical suplex and then drops his face on his knee, with the Go To (the) ER!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...thr- (Andrew Karnage kicks out)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Andrew Sinclair dragon suplexes Karnage!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Andrew Karnage rolls his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Karnage rolls out of the way of a falling headbutt. Karnage gut wrenches him up onto his shoulder and runs into the center of the ring with a ligerbomb!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Andrew Karnage claps his legs together on his head)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Karnage double underhooks Sinclair's arms, but Sinclair backdrops him. Sinclair scoops him up into a northern lights bomb!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...(Andrew Karnage gets his shoulder up)
Guillermo O'Bannon: Andrew Sinclair tags in Tatsuya Arakawa. Sinclair knees Karnage in the stomach, dropping him to all fours. Tatsuya runs off the ropes with a soccer kick to his face!
The audience lets out a collective "OH!!!" Tatsuya Arakawa pulls Karnage up by the hair and irish whips him into the ropes
Guillermo O'Bannon: Tatsuya Arakawa hits him with Aki Lariot!! He stares stoically at the camera afterwards...and doesn't notice Andrew Karnage no-selling it behind him!!
Karnage stands up and brushes himself off behind Tatsuya Arakawa while the audience roars. Arakawa notices the pop and turns around just in time to get his head taken off with a Nightmare Lariot!!! The crowd chants "KAR-NAGE!! KAR-NAGE!! KAR-NAGE!! KAR-NAGE!! KAR-NAGE!!" and Karnage rolls him over
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...thr- (Andrew Sinclair stomps his back)
"Wild" Bill Kasal: Twenty Five Minutes Have Elapsed. 5 Minutes Remaining."
Guillermo O'Bannon: Andrew Sinclair slams Karnage into the mat with an STO! Tatsuya Arakawa moves in for the kill with a rear naked choke!!
Hardkore Hall rocks with boos. Tatsuya Arakawa leans back on the choke, clamping his forearm against Karnage's throat
Guillermo O'Bannon: Adrian Tanner Jr. runs in and stomps Arakawa, breaking up the rear naked choke! Andrew Sinclair runs into the ring and knocks Tanner out of the ring with a running knee!
Tatsuya Arakawa lifts Karnage up into a fireman's carry, but Karnage slips onto his feet
Guillermo O'Bannon: Andrew Karnage irish whips Arakawa into the ropes and lays him out with Requiem for a Nightmare Lariat!!
Referee Ron Reid: 1...2...3!!!
Ron Reid signals for the bell, and "I'm the One" by Static-X plays through Palm Springs Convention Center. The crowd roars as Karnage & Tanner raise their arms
"Wild" Bill Kasal: "At 26 minutes 26 seconds; THE WINNERS OF THE MATCH, ADVANCING TO THE THIRD ROUND...THE UN-STABLE!!!"
Guillermo O'Bannon: Andrew Karnage and Adrian Tanner Jr. show that familiarity doesn't always breed...Tatsuya Arakawa jumps Andrew Karnage from behind!
Audience boos and Andrew Sinclair lays out an exhausted Tanner with a uraken! Tatsuya Arakawa reapplies the rear naked choke and timekeeper Ron De La O rings the bell over & over
Guillermo O'Bannon: Tatsuya Arakawa not finished with the AK-47, not by a sight, but this match is over!
Phil Blauer: Don't they hear the bell ringing??
Guillermo O'Bannon: Karnage not moving anymore as Arakawa continues to strangle him with his forearm.
Hardkore Hall erupts as Kilroy Evans runs down to the ring with a trash can. Sinclair taps Arakawa on the shoulder, but Arakawa doesn't respond
Guillermo O'Bannon: Sinclair pulls Arakawa off of Karnage but not before getting slammed in the back with a trash can by Kilroy Evans!
The Palm Springs audience throws trash and debris at the departing Tatsuya Arakawa & Andrew Sinclair, as Kilroy Evans & Adrian Tanner Jr. demand medical attention for Andrew Karnage