Requiem for the Peacemaker, a Major Award
Feb 27, 2024 16:19:30 GMT -5
edwarddubin0604, Jonnie Valentine, and 3 more like this
Post by Punisher on Feb 27, 2024 16:19:30 GMT -5
(Fade into Stein HQ in the Florida Keys. Outside it is sunny and warm, but inside it’s a different story inside where the camera pans to…the trophy room. It is dark. The mood is ominous. At first you think this must be a Lincoln ad and Matthew McConaughey will suddenly start speaking, but then it becomes clear this is something else entirely.)
Dan Stein: *inaudible cursing*
(Various trophies can barely be made out on the wall in the background…a gazelle, a Canadian moose, a framed 400 page volume of one of Pat Bozzini’s promos. In the center of the room, a single incandescent lightbulb shines starkly on a plain bracket, a holder now empty where the Peacemaker once was placed. Stein is staring at the empty bracket with a permanent scowl on his face. He cracks his knuckles simply by squeezing his hands into fists, and it sounds like…though you can’t be sure…that Stein is actually growling. A door flies open.)
Domino: Damn it’s dark in here! Let me turn on the light, and…
(The lights come on. Stein does not move. Domino, despite (or perhaps because of) her MILF status, looks impossibly good in a 2-piece bikini as she flies through the door. As she takes off her sunglasses to adjust, she is surprised by the presence of Stein standing alone growling at an empty bracket in the dark, but as she thinks about it for a few seconds, no…she is not at all surprised to see him here.)
Domino: Oh not this again. Seriously Dan, you need to get some fresh air. You’re creeping me out.
(Stein does not move, staring at the empty holder.)
Dan Stein: It’s gone, Dom. My right hand. My greatest trophy. The blood of champions is on that thing. THE. BLOOD. OF. CHAMPIONS.
(Stein looks at Domino, who looks back at him like he’s just as crazy as the people who stole it.)
Domino: That “club” was unsanitary. The tape was fraying on it, it was never cleaned, it…it’s just a stupid club, Dan.
Dan Stein(incredulous): “Just a stupid club?!” That was no club, Dom. That was the Peacemaker! There is no club on earth like it. Nothing can replicate it.
Domino: That’s right, Dan! It wasn’t like anything else! No one would want to replicate that piece of crap even if they wanted to! It wasn’t kept up for years, never cleaned, just taped up over and over again after you’d brain someone with it. It was gross…it had bits of skin, hair in it. God knows how much blood…That thing had more DNA than AVB’s mom on a Saturday night.
(Stein quietly raged as Domino continued her tirade, and sneered at her obvious disrespect. He was so angry he couldn’t yell, so he spit out the only thing he could:)
Dan Stein(quietly): You never liked the Peacemaker, Dom. You were… jealous.
(Domino, who should have laughed hysterically at this comment is, for some reason, irked by this comment. Very irked.)
Domino(stammering,incredulous): Me?! Jealous of a club?!
(Stein, in full fury, raged on.)
Dan Stein: THAT’S RIGHT! JEALOUS!
(This time, Domino loses it.)
Domino: That was….the ugliest club I have ever seen in my entire life!!
(Stein is out of his mind, shaking and hardly able to form words.)
Dan Stein: I... think... you... let... her... take it… ON PURPOSE!
(Stein storms off. Domino, standing there in her bikini, attempts to process what just happened. Abruptly, she looks at the camera and grimaces.)
Domino: Yikes Joe Nobody, I feel terrible for you. I know you’re all “I’m going to pour all my rage into this and blah, blah, blah” but let’s be honest, look at him right now. (points off-camera) Look at him. He’s nuts. That club means more to him than even me apparently. If you’re smart Joe, you’ll help him find that stupid club quickly… because if he doesn’t get that thing back before his match, I’m afraid he’s going to literally try and tear you in half, and then he’ll go to work on you.
(Off-camera, Stein grunts and a car tire flies across the screen, breaking something else offscreen. Why a car tire? Who knows.)
Domino(yells offscreen): Dammit, Dan! You almost hit me with that tire. (Domino faces the camera) So yeah, this is going to be interesting. We have to find that club before he breaks Hardkore World.
(Out of nowhere, Stein gets into the camera’s face. Is that a thing? It is now! Stein is wild-eyed.)
Dan Stein: Nobody! You’re a dead man! RIGHTEOUS! I’M COMING FOR YOU!!!
(Stein grabs the camera lens with his hands and squeezes, things go abruptly fuzzy and then fade out.)
Dan Stein: *inaudible cursing*
(Various trophies can barely be made out on the wall in the background…a gazelle, a Canadian moose, a framed 400 page volume of one of Pat Bozzini’s promos. In the center of the room, a single incandescent lightbulb shines starkly on a plain bracket, a holder now empty where the Peacemaker once was placed. Stein is staring at the empty bracket with a permanent scowl on his face. He cracks his knuckles simply by squeezing his hands into fists, and it sounds like…though you can’t be sure…that Stein is actually growling. A door flies open.)
Domino: Damn it’s dark in here! Let me turn on the light, and…
(The lights come on. Stein does not move. Domino, despite (or perhaps because of) her MILF status, looks impossibly good in a 2-piece bikini as she flies through the door. As she takes off her sunglasses to adjust, she is surprised by the presence of Stein standing alone growling at an empty bracket in the dark, but as she thinks about it for a few seconds, no…she is not at all surprised to see him here.)
Domino: Oh not this again. Seriously Dan, you need to get some fresh air. You’re creeping me out.
(Stein does not move, staring at the empty holder.)
Dan Stein: It’s gone, Dom. My right hand. My greatest trophy. The blood of champions is on that thing. THE. BLOOD. OF. CHAMPIONS.
(Stein looks at Domino, who looks back at him like he’s just as crazy as the people who stole it.)
Domino: That “club” was unsanitary. The tape was fraying on it, it was never cleaned, it…it’s just a stupid club, Dan.
Dan Stein(incredulous): “Just a stupid club?!” That was no club, Dom. That was the Peacemaker! There is no club on earth like it. Nothing can replicate it.
Domino: That’s right, Dan! It wasn’t like anything else! No one would want to replicate that piece of crap even if they wanted to! It wasn’t kept up for years, never cleaned, just taped up over and over again after you’d brain someone with it. It was gross…it had bits of skin, hair in it. God knows how much blood…That thing had more DNA than AVB’s mom on a Saturday night.
(Stein quietly raged as Domino continued her tirade, and sneered at her obvious disrespect. He was so angry he couldn’t yell, so he spit out the only thing he could:)
Dan Stein(quietly): You never liked the Peacemaker, Dom. You were… jealous.
(Domino, who should have laughed hysterically at this comment is, for some reason, irked by this comment. Very irked.)
Domino(stammering,incredulous): Me?! Jealous of a club?!
(Stein, in full fury, raged on.)
Dan Stein: THAT’S RIGHT! JEALOUS!
(This time, Domino loses it.)
Domino: That was….the ugliest club I have ever seen in my entire life!!
(Stein is out of his mind, shaking and hardly able to form words.)
Dan Stein: I... think... you... let... her... take it… ON PURPOSE!
(Stein storms off. Domino, standing there in her bikini, attempts to process what just happened. Abruptly, she looks at the camera and grimaces.)
Domino: Yikes Joe Nobody, I feel terrible for you. I know you’re all “I’m going to pour all my rage into this and blah, blah, blah” but let’s be honest, look at him right now. (points off-camera) Look at him. He’s nuts. That club means more to him than even me apparently. If you’re smart Joe, you’ll help him find that stupid club quickly… because if he doesn’t get that thing back before his match, I’m afraid he’s going to literally try and tear you in half, and then he’ll go to work on you.
(Off-camera, Stein grunts and a car tire flies across the screen, breaking something else offscreen. Why a car tire? Who knows.)
Domino(yells offscreen): Dammit, Dan! You almost hit me with that tire. (Domino faces the camera) So yeah, this is going to be interesting. We have to find that club before he breaks Hardkore World.
(Out of nowhere, Stein gets into the camera’s face. Is that a thing? It is now! Stein is wild-eyed.)
Dan Stein: Nobody! You’re a dead man! RIGHTEOUS! I’M COMING FOR YOU!!!
(Stein grabs the camera lens with his hands and squeezes, things go abruptly fuzzy and then fade out.)