SWAT Team
.::XHF Superstar::.
The Promise Land
Posts: 2,416
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Post by SWAT Team on Mar 23, 2019 20:36:51 GMT -5
We open to a jam packed T-Mobil Arena Las Vegas Nevada ... A Wise Guy by Joe Pesci hits www.youtube.com/watch?v=QrrkPHPwVfoand Joe Pesci makes his way down to the ring. Joe Pesci : Ok, ok ok ok ok ok ok ok. WELCOME TO NEW YEARS NIGHTMARE!!! We have a huge show to close out the year for you guys, but before we do, a couple of announcements. Firstly, i want you all to cast your minds back to our very first show on the relaunch. Rio! Return in Rio. We rocked it with the Olympians, and we had a gold medal of our of sorts that night. A golden ticket, that went to one Kilroy Evans, that ticket gets him a spot in our World Title match, when we are ready to produce one. Now, we are not quite ready yet, but we are getting there. The reason i bring this up you may ask, well, next year, we are kicking the year off with a Royal Rumble ... and .... the winner of that Rumble, also gets a Golden Ticket! Crowd pops Joe Pesci : Now, while on this rumble, we all know the winner of tonights 15 man battle royal will earn himself the last entrant spot in the rumble, but it appears, one Hells Bouncer has been shouting for the first spot. Well, son, you want it, YOU GOT IT! Hells Bouncer will officially be number ONE entrant in the rumble. And now, it is my great pleasure to introduce to you all a new signing, a young man i have known his whole life, and he will be debuting in the Rumble ..... THE GODSON .... JOEY MORELLI!!!! The lights dim "Tom Sawyer" by Rush hits the T-Mobile Arena PA speakers while first the words "The Godson" flashes over the big screen followed by a pause. Out walks Joey Morelli in a decent looking tan suit and with his wife Candice Morelli draped over his right arm. Candice is wearing a sexy blue dress that clings to every curve of her body. They look into the ring and they both turn around and look at the crowd before Joey gives them a cocky smile and Candice delivers her signature wink. The words "Modern Day Warrior" flash on the big screen then the lights turn on and they both enter the ring, Joey holding the ropes for Candice. Pesci runs up and gives his godson a hug then a kiss on each cheek Italian style. He does the same to his now goddaughter Candice. Joey goes over to the corner and gets a Mic from some guy named Mike Guy on the outside. Joey Morelli: Thanks, mic guy or guy named Mike, I think I can handle it from here. Go ahead and relax, take the rest of the night off. Joe Pesci: Don't tell him that, the next thing you know these guys will want a union with benefits and all that crap. Ok..ok..tell them why you are here! Joey Morelli: Damn, Uncle Joe, you are really charged up tonight, aren't you? Riggs must have been giving you a bad time in the back but don't worry I got all your problems solved..but before that say Hi, Candice. Hands the mic to Candice and the fans give her a huge pop. Candice Morelli: Hi, Candice! Hands the mic back to Joey after she smiles and winks to the crowd who once again pops loudly. Joey Morelli: Damn, babe. They seem to like you, gotta love that. Don't worry about her, she's learning and that Amazons region will never be the same, but that's not why we are here, is it? No, we are here to ease my Uncle Vinny..*pauses* my Uncle Joe, sorry there's so many of us it can get a bit confusing, to ease his mind after buying this place. You now have the second person entering the Royal Rumble...Me, The Godson of SWAT, The Modern Day Warrior of Professional Wrestling.....Joey Morelli! Joe Pesci: Holy shit! Why didn't I think of that? That's a fuckin' great idea. You coming in at number two-- Joey Morelli: Number two for your Godson-- Joe Pesci: I'm just messing with you, I wouldn't fuck you like they fuck you in the drive thru You get number 29, how's that! Joey Morelli: I like that number. No nepotism now, Unc. *He winks* Ladies and gentlemen, there you have it. Your Modern Day Warrior will enter the Royal Rumble at #29! Thank you and good night! *Fans boo* Say good night, Candice! The Fans cheer when he hands the mic to Candice. Candice Morelli: Good Night, Candice! The crowd has a mixed reaction as "Tom Sawyer", by Rush bounces over the PA once again, the scene fades to Pesci, Joey and Candice leaving the ring talking and laughing amongst themselves.
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SWAT Team
.::XHF Superstar::.
The Promise Land
Posts: 2,416
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Post by SWAT Team on Mar 23, 2019 20:37:14 GMT -5
Jeremy Tucker : Hey SWAT fans, what a way to kick off the show, the new owner laying the law down and how about the golden ticket up for grabs next month in the Royal Rumble?
Andrew Fulton : Back in the saddle Jerry. Hope everyone had a great Christmas, Number ONE commentary team in the business.
Jeremy Tucker : Why thanks Fulton, i didnt know you cared so much.
Andrew Fulton : Imagine if i had a REAL commentary partner?
Jeremy Tucker : Typical, whats up with Pesci, his Godson? debuts and gets the 2nd last entrant spot in the rumble, can he do that?
Andrew Fulton : You gonna tell him he cant?
Jeremy Tucker : Lets go to Frank, cause up now fans, we have the fifteen man battle royal, and the winner is the LAST entrant in next months Royal Rumble.
Frank Salazar : LADIES AND GENTLEMAN, THE FOLLOWING CONTEST IS SCHEDULED FOR ONE FAL ... WAIT, NO IT ISNT, ITS A BATTLE ROYAL!!!!!
Andrew Fulton : Live TV Frank!!!
Frank Salazar : IN THE RING AT THIS TIME .... Dave Brickheart!!!!! "Industrial Man" Attila Balan!!!!! Marcus White!!!!! Kilroy Evans!!!!!! Sadistic Insanity Damian Payne!!!!!! Tatsuo Takeshi!!!!!! Logan Burgess!!!!! Wasabi!!!!!! The Enigmatic Creature!!!!!! Bobby "The Man" Maples!!!!! Dean Green !!!!! Cade Corso!!!!!! Everett Rock Hard Aloni!!!! Brian Brewster!!!! Alex Coners!!!
Jeremy Tucker : Referee Bo Brady calls for the bell and this one is under way!
Andrew Fulton : Everyone runs at each other, and Marcus White grabs Alex Coners, and tosses him straight over the top rope, like yesterdays garbage!
Jeremy Tucker : Go Marcus!! See ya later Coners!! Logan Burgess with a right hand to Wasabi, a second, he winds back for a huge third, and it sends Wasabi tumbling over the top!! Wasabi is out!
Andrew Fulton : So long! I like this Logan Burgess! He looks great!
Jeremy Tucker : I like him too, Kilroy and Brickheart lock up, they are tussling in a elbow collar tie up, Brian Brewster comes for them both, he delivers a right hand to Kilroy, no effect, one for Brickheart now, no effect either ... Kilroy and Brickheart then look at one another and grab a side each of Brewster and double hip toss him all the way to the outside!!!
Andrew Fulton : So long Brewster!!! Kilroy and Brickheart two favourites in this one, old time SWAT alumni, and great to see Brickheart back in the ring.
Jeremy Tucker : Industrial Man is getting double teamed by Corso and Aloni, or at least they are attempting to double team him, he blocks a right from one, a left from the other, then rams their heads together, then wraps a hand around each mans throat, and runs them into the ropes, forcing both over the top to the outside!!!
Andrew Fulton : Industrial Man just eliminated BOTH Aloni and Cosro!!! How about that Car Pool ride here Jerry, i need to get in on that.
Jeremy Tucker : The Enigmatic Creature and Bobby Maples are duking it out against the ropes, here comes Dean Green ... DOUBLE CLOTHESLINE!!! GREEN JUST ELIMINATED BOTH CREATURE AND MAPLES!!
Andrew Fulton : Nice work by the rookie!
Jeremy Tucker : Only eight men remaining, a lot of dead wood gone already Fulton.
Andrew Fulton : Got to try here in SWAT, if you aint trying, you got no chance!
Jeremy Tucker : Damian Payne and Takeshi exchanging lefts and rights.
Andrew Fulton : Kilroy and Brickheart both going to work on Logan Burgess.
Jeremy Tucker : Industrial Man laying the boots into Dean Green.
Andrew Fulton : Logan Burgess comes up behind Takeshi and Payne, grabs a leg of each, and flips them over the top to the outside!!!
Jeremy Tucker : WOW! Both PAYNE and TAKESHI are OUT!!!
Andrew Fulton : Burgess on a roll!
Jeremy Tucker : Dean Green charges Industrial Man, and Balan back body drops him, over the top and all the way to the outside!!! Back luck Green, ambitious debut and spunky effort, but Industrial Man is one of THE best!
Andrew Fulton : He tried, ill give him that, Kilroy and Brickheart both now move onto Balan, and double team him down to the mat, trying now to haul him over the top, but he is hanging on and tying himself in the ropes.
Jeremy Tucker : Balan got himself well and truly entangled in the ropes, and Kilroy and Brickheart give up on that for the time being and look over at Marcus and Burgess, Marcus runs at Burgess, but Logan catches him and hot shots him onto the top rope, White is dangling precariously on the top rope, but holding himself in there, Logan runs up the turnbuckle and launches, nailing White with a curb stomp, which sends Marcus tumbling to the outside, Marcus White is eliminated!!!
Andrew Fulton : Thats FOUR men Burgess has taken out!!!
Jeremy Tucker : He landed on his feet on the ring apron after that flying curb stomp, and man, is he pleased with himself! The crowd cheering him on ... and he is loving it ..... NOOOOO!!! Kilroy and Brickheart both charge him and double clothesline him to the floor! Burgess is OUT!
Andrew Fulton : Celebrated too early, but what a showing!
Jeremy Tucker : Only Kilroy, Brickheart and Balan left in this one now, the three favourites.
Andrew Fulton : Kilroy grabs Brickheart and throws him over the top! The old grizzly old pro always on the ready!
Jeremy Tucker : NO!!! Brickheart grabs the top rope, legs dangling and skins the cat back in. Brickheart back in the ring ... eats an Industrial Man slow tornado snap DDT ... Bueller Overdrive!!!
Andrew Fulton : Kilroy swoops on Balan, hooks him in a cobra clutch, then plants Balan with a side Russian leg sweep.
Jeremy Tucker : Brickheart now swoops on Kilroy and tries to toss him over the top, Kilroy grabs the top rope and puts the breaks on, and Brickheart then hooks him by the head and runs up the turnbuckle and nails a sliced bread!!!
Andrew Fulton : Risky move! Balan now goes after Brickheart ... Fluid motion from kneebreaker into T-Bone Suplex!!!
Jeremy Tucker : OMG! Bad Touch Diamond Cutter from Kilroy to Balan!! Thats IT!
Andrew Fulton : Kilroy hoists Balan up and runs him to the ropes but Balan holds on. Brickheart to his feet and he goes to help Kilroy, but Balan gets a foot out and boots him in the guts.
Jeremy Tucker : Balan then with a head butt to Kilroy. Grabs him now and tries to hoist HiM over the top, no go, Kilroy holding on!
Andrew Fulton : Balan analyses the situation, then chop blocks Kilroy. Back body drop ... OVER THE TOP!
Jeremy Tucker : Kilroy is eliminated!!! No!! He holds on, grasping to the top rope, and swings himself back in, Brickheart charges Kilroy and delivers a perfect drop kick, Kilroy left with no option than to just wear it, and hold on for all he is worth.
Andrew Fulton : Balan then with a big right hand, and Kilroy is a piñata on the apron holding on.
Jeremy Tucker : Brickheart with a left to Kilroy, the man wont let go. He slides under the ropes past both men, somehow somersaults to his feet, bounces off the ropes and charges both with a furious double clothesline, sending both men over the top, both Brickheart and Industrial Man now clinging to the top rope.
Andrew Fulton : Kilroy snarls at them and unleashes a barrage of lefts and rights to both men, both holding on for dear life!
Jeremy Tucker : Kilroy grabs Brickheart by the ears and bites his forehead, blood now streaming down the face of Brickheart .... Balan head butts Kilroy and drops him in a heap, his head as strong as metal!
Andrew Fulton : Brickheart wiping the blood out of his eyes. Industrial Man grabs him, both still on the apron, he hoists Brickheart up and Jacknife powerbombs him onto the turnbuckle and Brickheart tumbles awkwardly to the floor!
Jeremy Tucker : BRICKHEART is eliminated!!!! Just Kilroy and Balan remaining!
Andrew Fulton : Kilroy charges furiously at Balan, jumping double high knee .... Balan is GONE!!!
Jeremy Tucker : No!! Balan grabs the top rope, pulls it down, and Kilroy goes sailing over the top!!!! Its OVER! INDUSTIAL MAN WINS!!! INDUSTRIAL MAN WINS!!!
Andrew Fulton : Attila Balan victorious! He is the last man to enter next months Royal Rumble!!!!
"Machines" by Giorgio Moroder blares and Balan celebrates in the ring.
Jeremy Tucker : What a wrestler! He is my pick for next months Rumble!
Andrew Fulton : Good on ya Jerry! Jump on the bandwagon why dont ya.
Jeremy Tucker : Kilroy and Brickheart both warily head up the rampway, both nodding to each other and then Balan with respect.
Andrew Fulton : I think i need a tissue Jerry, three nice gentleman here, im gonna puke!
Jeremy Tucker : Three of the best, next year could belong to any of these three, ALL THREE!
Andrew Fulton : Nice effort also by Logan Burgess, took out four guys, i am looking forward to seeing him in 2018 also!
Jeremy Tucker : 2018 can wait just a few hours longer Fulton, cause we got lots more action coming your way TONIGHT!
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SWAT Team
.::XHF Superstar::.
The Promise Land
Posts: 2,416
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Post by SWAT Team on Mar 23, 2019 20:38:18 GMT -5
Highway to Hell by ACDC hits and Hells Bouncer is standing on top of ramp, he lifts his head up and out from behind his trench coat a big mushroom cloud and a boom sound bellows, fire and fireworks explode and Hells Bouncer power walks down to the ring.
Frank Salazar: Introducing first, from Las Vegas, Hells Bouncer!
Jeremy Tucker :Hells Bouncer is to take on the newest member of the KGB, Bishop tonight. The thing about the Bandits, they never run alone. Theyre like rats. Big, smelly buffet eating rats.
Andrew Fulton : Those rats sign your paycheck Jerry. You better be praising our KGB Overlords if you know what is good for you.
Jeremy Tucker : Hells Bouncer has announced on social media that he was throwing his name into the royal rumble. The overlords, as you call them, cant be all that pleased with those developments, and Pesci just gladly granted his wish to be the first entrant.
Andrew Fulton : Hes just another warm body to be tossed over the top. If I know Suit, and I do know him quiet well, this match here is to wear HB down before the rumble. There is no way he gets out unscathed tonight.
An Image is shown on the Tron. It is Bishop pinning Michael Black. Then it cuts to him fighting one of the Harrison Sisters. A guitar riff sounds through the arena. Pictures of Dan Kilburn and Bishop standing in the ring, posing with Bishop holding the UHW World Title and Dan is holding the UHW US title. As the music picks up through the arena. Images of Bishop training harder than he has ever trained before are seen. Sweat is dripping from his face. Images of Brian and Andrew attacking Bishop are seen now. Bishop being carried out of the arena are seen. Then it cuts to a picture of Brian and Andrew holding the UHW Tag Team Titles being lit on fire.
Frank Salazar: Introducing next, from Grafton, West Virginia
Bishop!
Jeremy Tucker : And there is the newest member of the KGB, Bishop. He is making his return to the SWAT ring tonight to do battle with a massive man. I dont envy Bishop, even with the KGB at his back.
Andrew Fulton : Id rather the KGB be with me than against me. Bishop is no dummy, ya dummy. He is a massive man as well. To even suggest that Bishop needs the Bandits to win tonight is insulting. Does he need them? No.
Jeremy Tucker : But hes going to.
Stuck in the Middle With You starts to play over the PA system as The Hillbilly Assassin James Fierce slowly makes his way to the ramp. James is dressed in an all-white suit, and a white mask that covers all but his beard. James pulls out a microphone and taps it twice.
Jeremy Tucker: See, I told you. You knew the odds wouldnt be in Hells Bouncer favor going into this.
Andrew Fulton: The Hillbilly Assassin has something to say.
James Fierce: Hells Bouncer, quick question, do you keep people out of hell or in hell and how is the pay? Surely the prince of darkness can pay, but I am sure he is the scumbag boss type. Meme bad.
Jeremy Tucker: Fierce bringing up the important questions. We have a match, get on with it. Stop with the stalling.
Andrew Fulton: Its a valid question Tucker, let the man say his piece.
James Fierce: Meh, that aint important. Whats important is that you are in the ring with a bandit, and frankly youre a threat to me winning the rumble. A rumble that I am officially throwing my name in, and honestly winning. Because I like winning. Its better than losing. Or showering with Marcus White. Get a loofa, and stop dropping that shit son.
Bishop has a chair, and nails HB in the back.
Jeremy Tucker: Ah, Fierce with the distraction. But Hells doesnt flinch. Bishop may have just bitten off more than he can chew here folks.
Andrew Fulton: The distraction may not have worked, but Bishop still has the chair. And bandits are dangerous with chairs.
Jeremy Tucker: Bishop takes another swing, but Hells ducked and nail Bishop with a massive clothesline, turning the newest bandit inside out.
Andrew Fulton: He got lucky.
The crowd cheer hard as Zork Nontext comes out of the back, apparently searching for treasure. These cries of support for computer game character's thievery soon turn to jeers as he's followed by the hated GNUE and "Beelzebozo" Rosie Obliging w/Snide Etch E Sketch. It looks like the villainous trio have come out of the back to stop Zork in his quest for fortune, but all four are probably just planning to beat Bishop to death before the big brawl.
Andrew Fulton : Here comes Zork Nontext and some of the other SWAT Backyard parasites, despite President Phoenix strictly banning them from appearing on our broadcasts.
Jeremy Tucker : They act like theyre minding their own business, but its obvious they are just out here to take out Bishop and Fierce before the street fight!
Andrew Fulton : The KGB unaware and ----
The minute Zork pulls his +3 Elven Blade, security are quick to tackle him. The Atlantic Coast fans are incensed at this shabby treatment of their boy Zork, but happy to see security take out the other three.
Jeremy Tucker : Phoenix is a man of his word - here having the Backyard crew forcibly ejected. Not letting Viper getting any unfair numbers advantage in his match. I wouldn't be surprised if those four were sent downtown for booking, just to keep them from showing up again.
Andrew Fulton : God, lets hope they aren't booked downtown or anywhere else. I still have nightmares from the great outdoor fight.
Jeremy Tucker: Hells Bouncer lifts Bishop up and nails a German release suplex, sending Bishop outside of the ring. Fierce rushes over to Bishop to give him words of encourage, and knowing the bandits some possible threats if he is unable to take care of Hells Bouncer.
Andrew Fulton: That is not based on any facts. James Fierce only makes promises.
Jeremy Tucker: Bishop is helped back into the ring by Fierce and is met with immediate stomps from Hells Bouncer. Fierce up on the apron trying to get Bouncers attention , and succeeds in doing so, allowing Bishop to hit a school boy on HB.
Referee Tommy Maddox Jr: One.. Two
Andrew Fulton: Come on Tommy, speed up the count a bit, you worthless zebra.
Jeremy Tucker: Hells Bouncer back up to his feet and the two men tie up. HB gets the upper hand and gets the side headlock on Bishop. Bishop pushes off, sending him into the ropes, HB bounces off and nails bishop square in the jaw with a big boot! Bishop is out!
Referee Tommy Maddox Jr: One
two
Andrew Fulton: Fierce saves the day! Thats the benefits of being a bandit! Who else wouldve pulled the referee out onto the floor while you were looking up at the lights.
Jeremy Tucker: Benefits, eh? Im sure Bishop appreciates the help, but Im also sure that he now knows there are thirty six lights hanging above the ring.
Andrew Fulton: You counted?
Jeremy Tucker: Yeah. Im a member of Arena lighting quarterly, and it looks like Hells Bouncer has had enough of Fierce! He is in pursuit of the Hillbilly Assassin!
Andrew Fulton: Smart tactical move by the bandits. James doesnt have a match tonight. He can afford to run and distract Hells Bouncer, allowing Bishop time to recoup.
Jeremy Tucker: HB still in pursuit and is met with a clothesline from Bishop! Bishop gets a couple of stomps in before he and Fierce roll him into the ring. Bishop applies the Full Nelson, wearing down Hells bouncer a bit. Referee Tommy Maddox Jr checking on Hells Bouncer, making sure he still has some fight left to give.
Andrew Fulton: Call for the bell already. This match is doneski. Over. The newest bandit wins, plan and simple.
Jeremy Tucker: Hells Bouncer rams backwards into the corner, causing Bishop to release the hold. Bouncer regaining his faculties shakes off the affects of the full nelson and hits a belly to belly suplex!
Andrew Fulton: His hands were illegally locked! It says right here in the official SWAT rule book, under section 3, article 4 that no hands can be locked when hitting a belly to belly suplex.
Jeremy Tucker: There is no such thing. That is not a rule book, its a napkin from Burger King.
Andrew Fulton: The official sponsor of SWAT!
Jeremy Tucker: Hells Bouncer with some knees to the skull of Bishop. He pulls Bishop up and nails a piledriver! That should be it folks!
Referee Tommy Maddox jr: One
Two
Andrew Fulton: No!
Jeremy Tucker: Fierce just threw a water bottle and nailed the referee square between the eyes!
Andrew Fulton: Hes a man of many talents, and water bottle throws are another feat he excels at.
Jeremy Tucker: Hells Bouncer gets to his feet and goes to the rope to confront Fierce, but James launches another bottle, this time hitting a bit south of the border.
Andrew Fulton: Always wear protection. I do.
Jeremy Tucker: Bishop gets to his feet, sees Hells Bouncer doubled over, shrugs, and hits a running bulldog. He jumps back to his feet and ascends to the top rope, jumps and nails an elbow drop! He goes for the cover, but Referee Tommy Maddox is still out cold. Bishop with a few choice words gets back to work, cranking on the leg with an Indian Death lock. Hells Bouncer lets out a primal scream, summoning the demons from hell for assistance no doubt!
Andrew Fulton: Give up! Your leg isnt worth it!
Jeremy Tucker: Bishop releases the hold, and pulls Hells bouncer back up to his feet. He paint brushes the back of Hells Bouncer head a few times only to be lifted up and nailed with a spine buster! Both men are down! Referee Tommy Maddox jr. Finally makes his way back to his feet and begins the mandatory ten count.
Andrew Fulton: Hell never get that far. He has issues transitioning to the left hand. Watch.
Jeremy Tucker: Tommy Maddox at 6 and Hells Bouncer makes it to his feet first, while Bishop is on his hands and knees. Hells Bouncer pulls Bishop in. He lifts him up and nails Hells Powerbomb! Bishop bounces off the rope and as soon as he lands Hells Bouncer with a Giant splash! James Fierce is climbing the ropes!
Andrew Fulton: Save the day James!
Referee Tommy Maddox jr. One
two
Jeremy Tucker: James with the Picture Perfect elbow drop! Hells Bouncer moves! James nailed Bishop! Hells Bouncer throws Fierce out of the ring and covers Bishop!
Referee Tommy Maddox jr. : One
Two
Three!
Andrew Fulton: He stole one!
Frank Salazar : Stole? He dominated Bishop! Even with the assistance of Fierce! The winner of the match
. Hells Bouncer!
Highway to Hell begins to play as Hells Bouncer has his hand raised in victory
Jeremy Tucker: He defied the odds and won tonight! He took on the KGB and won!
Andrew Fulton: A battle won sure, but the war is still in the KGBs hand.
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SWAT Team
.::XHF Superstar::.
The Promise Land
Posts: 2,416
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Post by SWAT Team on Mar 23, 2019 20:38:43 GMT -5
[Switch to the back, and we see Roxy, she looks amazing and has a short white dress on and her hair pulled back in a pony tail. She is scrolling through her phone, Timeless is in game mode, bright purple unbuttoned silk shirt on and talking to an inattentive Roxy]
Timeless : Wait, soooo, there were TWO Industrial Mans? What is he now, like Doink? Has he been hanging with too many clowns? Who won that Battle Royal, Industrial Man or his Cyborg driver?
Roxy : (excitedly) Oi, Alex, check this out!
[She shows Timeless he phone and we see on it, a photo of her mooning the high school bus from the car pool promo, we see her perfect cheeks up against the window, and Triple Vs fat face squished up against the window like some weird ass third cheek that NO place beside them buns, and then we see a viral logo and then random people placing their own face over the top of Triple Vs fat head.]
[Roxy squeals delightedly and takes a photo of herself with her phone and add its it to the link and her own face is now beside her own butt.]
[Roxy then kisses Timeless on the cheek and head down the hallway and is approached by two police officers.]
Cop 1 : Maam. Pardon us, please come with us.
Roxy : What? Whats this all about?
Cop 2 : Please come with us maam.
[Scene switches to a room in the arena, and it suddenly takes on the Basic Instinct settings. Roxy sitting there in her short white skirt. She lights a cigarette.]
Cop 1 : Maam. There is no smoking in this building.
Roxy : What you gonna do, charge me with smoking?
Cop 2 : Please. If you will. We are investigating a matter that has caused serious injury to half a dozen youths maam. And our proof shows you are solely responsible.
Roxy : I dont know what you are talking about?
Cop 1 : There was a bus load of high school students maam, and you caused them to run off the highway to Las Vegas. Their vehicle rolled and several were lucky not to lose their lives, as is three are still in intensive care, and two others may never walk again.
Roxy : I did no such thing! This is ridiculous!
Cop 2 : We have proof maam.
[The officer drops a manilla folder on the desk, Pesci style, and hundreds of photos of Roxys ass up against the window in the car pool are splayed all over the table. In nearly all of them, you see Triple Vs fat head squished up like a third cheek against the window.]
Cop 1 : I have personally looked over these photos at least a thousand times each, i have every single one locked in my memory, this case, it is causing me problems at home, my wife doesnt like me bringing my work home and complains that i never have before but now i cant stop analysing this evidence.
Cop 2 : Not to mention the video footage from some of the phones. These poor kids Maam, they have been traumatised by your lewd actions.
Cop 1 : The question is .... what are we to do about this.
[Roxy uncrosses and recrosses her legs Basic Instinct style, both cops jaws drop to the floor, one is sweating, is that Newman? No, it cant be.]
Cop 1 : I think it best, if we can somehow make this just go away. So, we are going to issue you here with this fine for $238. For not wearing a seat belt in a moving vehicle. Think yourself lucky that this whole episode is a tad embarrassing to all parties concerned.
Cop 2 : And in future (under his breath i cant believe im saying this) Keep that pretty tush out of public view.
[Roxy accepts the fine and smiles to the officers, phew, a close call. Then, the doors flies open and Joe Pesci storms in, he is accompanied by SWAT attorney Gavin Slater.]
Joe Pesci : WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS! DO YOU HAVE A WARRANT? (to Roxy) DONT SAY A WORD.
Cop 1 : Sir, we were ju ...
Joe Pesci : YOU WERE JUST LEAVING! THATS WHAT YOU WERE. MOTHER FUCKIN COPS COME TRY RUIN MY SHOW! SHE IS SCHEDULED TO PARTICIPATE IN THE MAIN EVENT! THE MAIN EVENT!
Cop 2 : Sir, i dont think you underst
Joe Pesci : NO! YOU DONT UNDERSTAND! NO ONE TAKES TO MY WORKERS WITHOUT A WARRANT! NO ONE!
[The cops are starting to get agitated. Roxy tries to pipe up and Joe shouts her down again.]
Joe Pesci : I TOLD YOU DONT SAY A GOD DMAN WORD!
[Roxy rolls her eyes and passes the fine across to Slater who reads over it, then taps Joe on the shoulder and shows him the fine.]
Joe Pesci : Already? We only just got in the room! You sir are the greatest lawyer to ever walk a court room. I dont know how you do it, first the {No Means No} charges and now this, in only 90 seconds, but god damn, good work!!!
[Pesci pats Gavin Slater on the shoulder and they both leave, Roxy straightening her dress, the cops ogling her a tiny bit too much.]
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SWAT Team
.::XHF Superstar::.
The Promise Land
Posts: 2,416
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Post by SWAT Team on Mar 23, 2019 20:39:00 GMT -5
Michelle Williams: "Coming up in a matter of moments is nothing short of bittersweet and totally epic as the legendary Hardkore World veteran and our old broadcast colleague, who could be rejoining us Dragonatrix facing off against her bitter rival Neela Shizeguma."
Kathleen Parks: "Seriously she's returning to the broadcast table after she was forced to remain a member of the SWAT Amazons roster. Angela obviously must have a serious issue with Neela or she's up to something."
Glamorous Glenda: "Ever since that attack on Dragonatrix by Neela in the parking lot and that bloody battle they had in Rio plus the fact she cost Dragonatrix a chance to retire and the fact she saved that ingrate from Boston Janice Knight."
Michelle Williams: "You both seem to have valid points. What is Angela's reasons for agreeing to this and why did they also put up their briefcases and contracts and rematch clauses on the line. Dragonatrix in particular. You talked to her earlier since she didn't even want to be near Donna Heart and for good reason."
(They switch to Glamorous Glenda and Dragonatrix in the ringside seating area."
Glamorous Glenda: "I'm here with Dragonatrix, who is facing her bitter rival Neela Shizeguma in what's being billed as you're retirement match. What brought about this decision and how were you able to get Angela to agree to this."
Dragonatrix: "First off every athlete in every sport knows they have their limits. When Dragon Tzu and The Shootfighter trained me to become a professional wrestler. They told me that one day I would reach my limits and tonight is when I reach mine and retire from the sport I love so much. As for your second question Angela still needs me to help push the new talent every once in a while not to mention she still needs a good guest enforcer and broadcast colleague."
Glamorous Glenda: "You mean unofficially."
Dragonatrix: "Yeah unofficially like The Undertaker or other wrestlers on certain occasions."
Glamorous Glenda: "You and Neela have been bitter rivals since SWAT Amazons began operations. What brought about all this bitterness and why?"
(Dragonatrix looks thoughtful for a few moments.)
Dragonatrix: "I don't know how this all came about but my best guess is that Neela didn't like the fact that I was the referee in what should have been a tag team match between her and Kitamura Miyoshi and Alice and Tornado Red which turned into a four way brawl and Angela made it a four tag match between them. It came down to Neela and Kitamura and in the end Neela tapped out and throughout that whole match I literally keep control of the match and called it straight down the middle. So if she wanted to start a war with me and if she can't finish it. I'm going to finish it once and for all and go out a winner."
Glamorous Glenda: "You wanted an Ultimate Death Match as your last match. What kind of match is it and why this kind of dangerous match."
Dragonatrix: "You'll see what an Ultimate Death Match is and how dangerous it is. You see it's a combination of matches but what kind of matches....."
(She smiles slyly.)
Dragonatrix: "You'll see when the time comes. Believe me I'll give you a hint of what's going to come out of it. There's going to be plenty of pain and agony. There's also going to be rivers of blood and gore and it's going to be flowing from the two of us and nobody's going to forget this match or even be the same."
Glamorous Glenda: "Now for an issue that's wasn't totally resolved and why I'm interviewing you involving Janice Knight, Lana Lovelace and her sister Donna Heart who is a fellow interviewer. They interfered with your match involving Ashton Wyatt at the tribute show."
(Dragonatrix's expression becomes dark with uncontrolled fury.)
Dragonatrix: "If any or all three of those ungrateful women even come ten inches or any distance to ringside and interfere in this match. I'm going to show them how it really feels to take a warning seriously or pay the consequences. They better stay away from this angry Dragonatrix. Believe I'm not just going to hurt them. I'm going to end their careers once and for all."
Glamorous Glenda: "One last thing. What do you think brought this all on."
Dragonatrix: "I don't know but I can see I made a mistake in saving their ungrateful asses and their careers from being ended. I can promise you this I won't make the same mistake twice and I will show no mercy and they will regret the day they crossed Dragonatrix."
Glamorous Glenda: "Well good luck and enjoy your semi-retirement."
Dragonatrix: "I'm definitely going to enjoy this match and my retirement."
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SWAT Team
.::XHF Superstar::.
The Promise Land
Posts: 2,416
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Post by SWAT Team on Mar 23, 2019 20:39:28 GMT -5
(They switch back to Michelle Williams, Kathleen Parks and Glamorous Glenda.)
Michelle Williams: "Looks like Dragonatrix let her intentions be known."
Kathleen Parks: "Be assured one thing. If Janice Knight, Lana Lovelace or even Donna Heart interfere. They won't even be able to wrestle again let alone be able to live to see another day."
Glamorous Glenda: "She's determined to take names and settle scores even if it means ending the careers of those she's settling the score with."
Michelle Williams: "The steel structure has been lowered and secured and right now let's go to the ring for this first ever Ultimate Death Match."
Frank Salazar : "This next match is scheduled for one fall and it's an Ultimate Death Match. It's a half Hell in a Cell, Steel Cage, Electrical, Fire and Barbed Wire, Pins Count Anywhere, with No Disqualifications Exploding Cage Match....."
Kathleen Parks: "I can't believe she actually got all that in with one breath."
Glamorous Glenda: "I don't think anyone can repeat that multiple times."
Frank Salazar : "First introducing from Okinawa, Japan now hailing from New York City, NY. She comes in at 5'10" and weighs in at 165lbs. Accompanied by Cam Davit Neela Shizeguma."
(The ringsiders boo as "Mustang Mismo" from the Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift plays and Cam and Neela appear at the top of the ramp. Both wait a moment before Neela starts down the ramp with Cam close behind her. She gets to the structure and stops outside it as Cam comes up to her. Neela nods her head and climbs into the steel structure carefully eyeing the structure.)
Dragonatrix: "Now introducing from Hong Kong, China. She comes in at 6ft. and weighs in at 175lbs. She is making her last appearance in a wrestling ring. Please welcome the legendary Hardkore World veteran Dragonatrix."
("Mary Magdelen" by Guns N' Roses plays and fiery pyros explode all the way down to the ringside area as Dragonatrix appears at the ringside entrance. She is holding her barbed wire baseball bat in one hand and she points a fist with the other. before storming through the pyros and entering the steel structure posing Chyna like with her fists on her hips. She snaps her head and glares at Neela who glares back at her. Both refuse to blink and continue to glare with hatred and rage still glaring lasers at the other.)
Michelle Williams: "The structure's door remains open as it's a pins count anywhere match too. The bell rings and this match is officially underway. They circle and lock up and Dragonatrix forces Neela into the ropes and they grapple for position until Dragonatrix traps Neela into a corner."
Kathleen Parks: "The referee calls for a break, which would be a miracle with the issues these two women have for the other. As predicted Neela cheap shots Dragonatrix with lefts and rights but Dragonatrix counters with some lefts and rights of her own. She whips Neela into the ropes and she clotheslines her hard with authority."
Glamorous Glenda: "Dragonatrix drops a series of elbows onto Neela's chest and follows up quickly with a series of knee drops onto her head. Dragonatrix is definitely going to show her determination to teach Neela a lesson for what she did to Suzi Spitz."
Michelle Williams: "Not to mention send a warning to Janice Knight, Lana Lovelace and her sister Donna Heart that their careers are in jeopardy. Dragonatrix smashes Neela's head repeatedly into the steel cage mesh and rubs her head repeatedly and she's cut open real badly."
Kathleen Parks: "Dragonatrix attempts to ram Neela's head into the electrified steel cage post but Neela resists and counters by ramming Dragonatrix's head into that electrified steel cage post. She waits and she charges and trainwrecks Dragonatrix who's in pain from those electrical sparks."
Glamorous Glenda: "Neela grabs some of that barbed wire and wraps it around Dragonatrix's head and face. She uses a knee in Dragonatrix's back and pulls backwards shredding some of Dragonatrix's mask, head and face open. Neela's obsessed with destroying Dragonatrix and vice versa."
Michelle Williams: "Both are obsessed with destroying the other. Neela mounts Dragonatrix and proceeds to ground and pound with the barbed wire wrapped around her fists. She whips Dragonatrix into another electrified corner but Dragonatrix reverses it and Neela feels the electrical shock of the corner."
Kathleen Parks: "Dragonatrix finds the barbed wire Neela used and wraps it around her face and head and she places her knee into Neela's back and returns the favor by pulling backwards. She then places a body scissors around Neela's waist while she tightens her grip around Neela's head making her bleeding much worse."
Glamorous Glenda: "Looks like the blood bank's going to need a huge bailout after this match is over. Neela's struggling and finally gets to the ropes forcing a break. Dragonatrix uses her gloved hands to get some fire and uses those burning hands to burn Neela's face and stomach."
Michelle Williams: "Let no one say that these two won't find creative ways to reign punishment on each other. Dragonatrix sets up Neela and suplex's her into another electrified corner and makes the cover....One....Two....Kick out by Neela."
Kathleen Parks: "Dragonatrix scoops up Neela and running power slams her the electrified corner again and scoops her up again and rams her shoulder into the ring post and throws her out of the steel structure. She smashes Neela's face into the ring steps and hotshots Neela's throat into the security guard railing and she proceeds to leap frog onto Neela's neck."
Glamorous Glenda: "Neela's going to need a new windpipe by the end of this match. Dragonatrix just grabbed a chair and she waits and smashes it into Neela's face repeatedly. She follows up with a series of chair shots to Neela's neck, face and head and then relentlessly pounds her back with the chair. She waits and Neela turns onto her back and gets that chair jammed into her throat repeatedly before using that chair to choke her."
Michelle Williams: "Dragonatrix grabs some more bared wire and from outside the ring and once again wraps it around her fists before returning the ground and pound that Neela gave her earlier without any mercy. She whips Neela into the steel fence but Neela desperately reverses it and she sends Dragonatrix into the fence where that barbed wire is hanging and it gets stuck in Dragonatrix 's back."
Kathleen Parks: "Which is stuck tight in Dragonatrix's back deep and it's also in her neck I might add. Neela charges and charges Dragonatrix executing a series of jumping knees that really send Dragonatrix to one knee. Neela then Thai clinches her and continues the assault with even more knees to Dragonatrix's face and head forcing Dragonatrix to one knee again after that brutal assault with her knee strikes."
Glamorous Glenda: "Neela delivers a series of brutal and violent kicks to Dragonatrix's head, face and body. She starts climbing the cage fence and waits for Dragonatrix to get up and she comes off with a dropkick. Since when do you execute a dropkick off the side of a steel cage."
Michelle Williams: "Like I said these two are finding ways creative weighs to reign punishment on the other. Neela whips Dragonatrix into the security railing she clotheslines both herself and Dragonatrix over the security railing and into the ringside seating area."
Kathleen Parks: "Neela continues her brutal and violent assault on Dragonatrix with another series of kicks to the back of her head and then to her back. Neela brutally smashes Dragonatrix's face and head into the edge of the seating row steps and then proceeds to grind her head into those same steps."
Glamorous Glenda: "Both seem eager to raise the level of brutality to even higher levels. Neela takes Dragonatrix up the steps and into the mid-level seating levels. This isn't looking good since it means someone is really going to get hurt and I don't mean the foolish wrestling fans that don't scatter and remain when a wrestler falls right on top of them."
Michelle Williams: "Neela's attempting to body slam Dragonatreix over the barrier down in the row below. Dragonatrix slips out and counters with a bodyslam sending Neela over the barrier and she falls into the seating area down into that level. Oh no she isn't about to do what I think she's going to do."
Kathleen Parks: "Oh she's definitely going to monkey flip off the barrier onto Neela. She's flying and she splashes onto Neela and the referee scrambles to make the count.....One.....Two.....Neela barely gets an arm up......"
(Some of the SWAT Amazons roster just appeared on the ramp way.)
Kathleen Parks: "Look some of the SWAT Amazons roster just appeared on the rampway."
Glamorous Glenda: "I guess they want to witness history and enjoy the action. Anyway, it's a miracle the Neela can even move in such a small space. Dragonatrix takes Neela up through the entranceway and she takes her to the concession stand area. Can you even believe the fans are actually taking selfies of the action."
Michelle Williams: "At least they can brag about being part of the action. Dragonatrix whips Neela into the wall and she returns the favor with a running high jumping knee. She whips Neela into the serving area of a hotdog concession stand and clotheslines her hard before bodyslamming Neela into the hotdog concession stand."
Kathleen Parks: "History repeats itself with these two adding their secret ingredients the hotdogs and I don't mean ketchup, mustard and whatever other condiments are there. She body slams Neela onto the hot plate and Neela's screaming in pain while Dragonatrix delivers some brutal sledgehammer fists one after the other each more hard and more brutal than the other."
Glamorous Glenda: "The fans crowd around the outside while the own of the stand is complaining. Dragonatrix takes something out of her glove and hands over a wad of money. How did she put that big a wad into her gloves......"
Michelle Williams: "Don't ask me."
Glamorous Glenda: "The fans continue to watch the brutality and continue to film and take photos and selfies of the action. Dragonatrix faceplants Neela into the floor before finding a can of something and smashes it into the back of Neela neck......"
(More members of the SWAT Amazons roster appears on the rampway.)
Glamorous Glenda: "Looks like more of the SWAT Amazons roster just came out to watch history being made."
Michelle Williams: "This match has significance and they want to see the outcome. Dragonatrix just hotshot Neela's throat into that glass barrier and fans seem to be enjoying taking selfies with Neela as her neck slumps downward and Dragonatrix unceremoniously throws her out of the concession stand. She climbs over the barrier and sets up Neela and she suplex's her onto the floor. Now the whole SWAT Amazon roster is out on the ramp way."
Kathleen Parks: "Dragonatrix whips Neela into the wall and Neela counters by putting her knees up and followed by a clothesline. Neela sets up Dragonatrix and she suplex's her onto the floor. S he grabs someone's soft drink and drinks it before spitting it onto Dragonatrix. You know the worst part about that was."
Michelle Williams: "No what."
Kathleen Parks: "Unlike Dragonatrix she didn't even pay for the drink."
Glamorous Glenda: "Now that's a good one, but a good idea to do when it comes to Dragonatrix. Neela sets up Dragonatrix and executes a shining wizard before making the pin......One....Two....Dragonatrix kicks out."
Michelle Williams: "Neela sees a fire extinguisher and yanks it away from the wall and she smashes it repeatedly into Dragonatrix's back and neck. She sets up Dragonatrix and she belly to back suplex's her hard onto the floor and bridges up.....One....Two.....T....No! Dragonatrix gets a shoulder up."
Kathleen Parks: "Neela whips Dragonatrix into the wall but Dragonatrix desperately counters with an elbow to her face staggering Neela. She superkicks Neela who's barely on her feet. She dropkicks Neela and she grabs a fan's soda and once again goes into her glove and takes out a few bills and slaps it into his hand. She drinks it and returns the favor by spitting into Neela's face."
Glamorous Glenda: "I guess one spitting incident deserves another. Dragonatrix drags Neela back into the arena and down the steps again. She throws Neela by the hair and down the steps unceremoniously and goes after her. She sets Neela up and faceplants her hard into the lower steps and drops a knee onto Neela's neck and grinds her head and face hard with her knee still on her neck."
Michelle Williams: " She picks up Neela and body slams her with authority. She drags her back to the ringside seating area and sets her up for a pile driver but Neela desperately counters with a back body drop and delivers a series of vicious knees to Dragonatrix's face and head."
Kathleen Parks: "Neela starts to climb up the steel structure and she leaps off again and splashes Dragonatrix. She places two chairs on Dragonatrix and again climbs the steel structure again and jumping off stomping on both chairs and makes the cover.....One....Two .......Th......No! Kick out again by Dragonatrix.
Glamorous Glenda: "Neela sets up a table and she body slams Dragonatrix onto it before she rips off some barbed wire off the steel structure and wraps it around both the table and Dragonatrix. She climbs the structure again and she splashes Dragonatrix through the table barbed wire and all."
Michelle Williams: "I hate to say this but it could be the end of an amazing career for the legendary Hardkore World veteran Dragonatrix. This could be the final images anyone will remember as Neela makes the cover and hooks both legs.....One....Two..... Thr.....No! Dragonatrix manages to get an arm up and Neela's really upset."
Kathleen Parks: "Neela waits as Dragonatrix slowly gets up and she unsteadily turns and Neela lets loose a super kick but Dragonatrix grabs her foot and executes a dragon screw and transitions quickly into an ankle lock. She seems to be working on that injured leg that Kitamura Miyoshi injured when they wrestled for the SWAT Amazons Women's Championship."
Glamorous Glenda: "Dragonatrix keeps the ankle lock cinched in and she's obsessed with reinjuring Neela. She doesn't care if she does since it's no disqualification and being it's her last match means she wants to go out with a bang and the ultimate blaze of glory."
Michelle Williams: "Probably the ultimate bang and go out with a blaze of glory would be to blow up the structure with Neela inside it. Dragonatrix once again transitions into a figure four ankle lock. I can't believe what I just saw. Some fans just threw something hard at her and proceeded to use a laser pointer and a paint ball gun at Dagonatrix."
Kathleen Parks: "Those aren't fans that's Janice Knight, Donna Heart and Lana Lovelace. They aren't even scheduled to wrestle or interview wrestlers respectively due to Dragonatrix's temper and speaking of which she is steamed which means trouble for them. Dragonatrix grabs both Lana and Donna over the guard railing by their collars and into the ringside area. She does the same with Janice Knight."
Glamorous Glenda: "Dragonatrix chases all three of them and they start to climb the cage with a really angry Dragonatrix their asses. No sooner do they reach the top they wait and they attack Dragonatrix triple teaming her. Imagine Lana and Janice aren't even cleared the protocols but they probably want to end Dragonatrix's career. They continue to put the boots to her back, head and neck followed by clubbing forearms to those same areas they delivered their boot stomps."
Michelle Williams: "Dragonatrix attempts to get up but Janice Knight and Lana Lovelace continue to pummel her with double axe handles. She counters with a series of head butts to their crotches. Dragonatrix delivers a series of hard uppercuts staggering them."
Kathleen Parks: "Neela is slowly making her way up the structure while Dragonatrix continues to beat down Janice, Lana and Donna. She sets up Lana and power bombs her down onto the hard concrete floor. She may have hit her head hard on the security guard railing. Dragonatrix sets up Janice Knight and does the same sending Janice onto the hard concrete floor and she definitely hit hard into the security guard railing."
Glamorous Glenda: "She looks like she got the worst of it and she doesn't look good and neither does Lana. Donna barely escapes by climbing down the steel structure. You can tell Dragonatrix is obsessed with destroying those three like she promised during the interview."
Michelle Williams: "Dragonatrix doesn't see Neela crouching and she turns around and gets speared off the Steel structure's roof. Neela barely hung on to the edge of the roof while Dragonatrix just fell into the ringside seating area. Neela climbs back onto the structure's roof and she waits and executes a Superfly Splash from the top of the structure and onto Dragonatrix.....One.....Two.....Thr....No! Dragonatrix manages to bridge out."
Kathleen Parks: "Nobody can believe that Dragonatrix kicked out let alone survive that fall from the roof of the steel structure. Even Neela can't believe it. Hell I can't even believe Dragonatrix bridged out of that move."
Glamorous Glenda: "Neela's looking like she's gone ballistic. She mounts Dragonatrix and is choking and clawing at Dragonatrix's eyes. Dragonatrix attempts to counter by using her knee to strike and barely uses her upper body to arch up throwing Neela forward."
Michelle Williams: "Neela finds a chair and attempts to smash Dragonatrix's head but Dragonatrix counters with a jumping high spinning kick which connects with the chair and Neela's staggered. Dragonatrix grabs the chair and she repeatedly hits Neela hard with the chair before jamming Neela's throat with that chair and choking her relentlessly with it."
Kathleen Parks: "Once again I say this but these two are determined to kill each other. Dragonatrix opens up a can of whoop ass and sets up the chair and this time she does succeed in executing a pile driver onto that chair. She picks Neela up still holding her in that pile driver position and does it a second time before going for the cover.....One.....Two....Th.....No! Neela somehow kicks out."
Glamorous Glenda: "These two are both well prepared and most of all determined to survive this brutal and bloody battle. That's what this monster of a structure seems to be made for when it comes to settling bitter wars. Dragonatrix brings Neela back into this monstrous structure and whips her into one of the electrified posts and Neela's screaming in agony."
Michelle Williams: "Dragonatrix whips Neela into the opposite electrified post and once again Neela's in extreme pain. It just got worse as Dragonatrix just charged in and trainwrecked her. Look at those sparks and smoke and Neela's suffering just like Dragonatrix earlier on in the match."
Kathleen Parks: "It only gets worse as Dragonatrix whips her into the barbed wire and she's really screaming in pain as she's stuck to the barbed wire that's seems to be deep in her skin. Dragonatrix unceremoniously tears her away throws her to the canvas."
Glamorous Glenda: "Dragonatrix just turned Neela on her back and goes over to where the fire is and she once again lights her gloves on fire and goes over to Neela and slams those gloved hands into Neela's back and sits on a squirming Neela burning her."
Michelle Williams: "Dragonatrix promised to finish the war between herself and Neela and she's kept to that vow. You can tell that she's a woman of her word. She sets Neela up and she Chyna Bombs her. She does it a second and a third time and looks around as the ringsiders encourage her to do it again and she obliges by Chyna Bombing Neela three more times."
Kathleen Parks: Dragonatrix sets up Neela and executes a German suplex. She does it a second and a third time and then does it three more times with an overhead throw. She goes for the cover.....One.....Two.....Thr......No! Neela gets an arm up."
Glamorous Glenda: "Dragonatrix attempts a choke slam but Neela desperately elbows her way out. She starts kicking at Dragonatrix's legs and executes a dragon screw leg sweep of her own. She keeps hold of the leg and executes a spinning toehold before transitioning into an Indian Leg lock."
Michelle Williams: "That was both a desperate and intelligent counter move by Neela. These two are showing how much they know each other and are determined to prove their willingness to go tit for tat with the other. The whole roster and the ringsiders are enjoying this last war, this last match and last battle involving Dragonatrix."
Kathleen Parks: "Not to mention the amazing and exciting action SWAT Amazons has to offer. Dragonatrix continues to strain but she manages to reverse the Indian Death lock. She transitions into a figure four leg lock and Neela's in pain as she strains to reverse it and she does."
Glamorous Glenda: "When this match is over both these women won't be the same as Dragonatrix warned in the pre-match interview. Dragonatrix grits her teeth in pain as she strains to reverse it. She manages to reverse the figure four again and now for the usual clichéd question of who's going to be the one who grabs the ropes first."
Michelle Williams: "Neela's inching as she attempts to turn herself around. She strains and and does reverse the figure four. Neela increases the pressure by pulling back and forth on the leg and wrenching it from one side to the other as the referee checks and Dragonatrix refuses to give up or submit."
Kathleen Parks: "Dragonatrix pounds her fists on the canvas and still refuses to tap out. She continues to pound her fists hard on the canvas as she grinds and strains to turn herself over once again to regain control of the figure four and Neela grabs the ropes first."
Glamorous Glenda: "Dragonatrix takes her time releasing the hold knowing there's no disqualification in the match. Both are slow to get up and are limping real badly. No sooner are they back to their feet staggering they start exchanging stiff forearms staging the other. They're screaming and challenging the other to bring it on."
Michelle Williams: "That's an understatement as they increase the intensity of their forearm smashes. They start throwing elbows while gripping the other's head. No one said this was going to be pretty and these two are delivering on that promise."
Kathleen Parks: "Are they ever. Dragonatrix whips Neela who reverses it and delivers a flying forearm. She goes for the cover.....One....Two.....Th.....No! Dragonatrix gets a shoulder up. These two are refusing to give."
Glamorous Glenda: "Neela whips Dragonatrix into the ropes but Dragonatrix reverses it and counters with a flying shoulder tackle. She signals the end and cinches in a tazmission and she drops back onto the canvas and cinches in a body scissors."
Michelle Williams: "She's thrashing around to prevent herself from being self pinned. Neela's struggling to get to the ropes but seems to be too far from them. Neela's fading and the referee's checking on her but she refuses to tap out."
Kathleen Parks: "Dragonatrix tightens her grip and around Neela's body and throat. Neela finally taps out and the bell rings ending this bloody and brutal last war with a victory for the legendary Dragonatrix and it was an epic climax."
Glamorous Glenda: "What an epic climax it was. These two women gave it their all and they went at it tooth and nail. Both the ringsiders and the whole roster saw a memorable match between Neela Shizeguma and Dragonatrix. Dragonatrix goes into semi-retirement a winner."
Ring Announcer: "Your winner at 31minutes Dragonatrix."
Michelle Williams: "Dragonatrix prevails in her final match....."
Kathleen Parks: "For now since she's still going to be semi-retired."
Glamorous Glenda: "Dragonatrix's second tour 2.0."
Michelle Williams: "Things will be quite interesting in the weeks and months to come. Neela's being taken away on a stretcher with Cam at her side. While Dragonatrix has her arm raised in victory as she looks at Neela."
Kathleen Parks: "I don't like the look on her face. She slowly leaves the steel structure and goes over to Cam who backs off, and she points to the briefcase which he hands over and she opens hers and Neela's up. She takes her contract and rematch clause out of hers and she places it into Neela's before returning it and goes over to Neela and raises her arm in recognition as well."
Glamorous Glenda: "Everyone's buzzing about this situation. That was a great show of sportsman ship."
Michelle Williams: "It sure was and the ringsiders cheer for her."
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SWAT Team
.::XHF Superstar::.
The Promise Land
Posts: 2,416
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Post by SWAT Team on Mar 23, 2019 20:39:44 GMT -5
[New Years night... the first super moon of the year 2018, not that you would know it from that sky.]
[Welcome to Fabulous Las Vegas.]
[Just on the outskirts of the city, the big neon sign welcomes tourists. The last line in the sand before the point of no return. Starring up at the malevolent white, red and blue inanimate object; the Devil of SWAT can't help but feel jealous. How much more human suffering has this sign created than Old Scratch will ever be able to commit in his remaining lifetime. How much more time before the match? They seem to be going along at a rapid clip. Time flies when you would rather be in a royal rumble. Pulling out his phone, the king of snakes runs a sharpened talon across the touch screen to prompt the clock. Not much time left. Can he win over any of the SWAT regulars? Get some muscle to factor out the KGB, keep his ultra violent exchanges with Soutter one on one?]
[...A notification. Timeless and Daniel Collins won the feud of the year.]
Fucking Sssoutter...
[Flinching, the king of snakes can't help but shake his head in disgust before turning to the camera.]
...Feud of the year.
Notice anything different about that category to all the others that the fans were voting on? How about there only being four options? Even the Amazon of the year managed to get five... they added Tornado Red to hit five. Can you believe it? The female equivalent of Sssoutter.
Ssso why did feud of the year only have four?
Were there so few feuds in SSSWAT this year they couldn't think of a fifth one? Is that it? A years worth of programming and only four rivalriesss were considered heated?
Now I have two theories about why there are only four... it could be either of them. Listen to my reasoning, and let me know which one you think...
Theory number one. Despite trying to ruin any chance of me seeing my grandson again, and beating me into a near coma. Framing me for one of his underlings - the redneck killer - one of his underlings going to the hospital. Making me out to be a bad guy in dishonouring Adrian Tanner's name, when we all saw the shit show he turned that Haunted House match into... and seemingly taking it personally that I was trying to destroy his only legacy... in spite of all of that... Vile Viper vs Sssoutter doesn't rank as a feud. It wasn't as compelling as Vile Viper vs Kilroy Evans, and he didn't want to nominate my name multiple times for fear of showing everyone how awesome I am........
But couldn't it be that like all things KGB... he DESPERATELY wanted for CSSSK to take home that prize? CSSSK had already been pretty much owned on every other poll, including the wrestler of the year... and it was starting to make the KGB look like the lame, sitting duck, boys club, which frankly it probably is. DESPERATE for CSSSK and Goth to win the feud honors, he buried his own feud with me... realizing it would split the vote and probably give that stupid robot and clown another trophy. This makes sense, as me and Kilroy are quite tight... its almost like young Evansss was a chip off my old block. So no Viper vs Sssoutter was to help vote tampering, and not a reflection on how much better I'm kicking his ass than any of the other nominees...
THEORY TWO. We don't have a feud, because we're actually best friends. Like Industrial Tool and Wannabe Vile, there is no animosity between us, and I am the closest thing to a friend that Sssoutter will ever have.
I'd like to think it was theory number one... because I am not Sssoutter'sss friend, and REALLY hate his guts...
...but sssadder things have happened.
Ssso in the next hour, I'm going to march down that strip, and Sssoutter is going to be put into a coma by the only friend he's ever known. Hopefully he thinks enough of me to put my name on the power of attorney, because much like I'm planning to do to SSSWAT, I won't think twice about pulling that cord.
Be seeing you, bud!
[Shooting one of his infamous sneers, Vile turns back to the "Welcome to Fabulous Las Vegas" sign. He hopes to one day be reincarnated as that malicious sign. Pull the cord.]
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SWAT Team
.::XHF Superstar::.
The Promise Land
Posts: 2,416
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Post by SWAT Team on Mar 23, 2019 20:40:32 GMT -5
("Money" the theme from the television series "The Apprentice" plays and Angela comes to ringside and she enters the ring. The ringsiders chant and roar as she enters the ring and looks around before pulling out her cordless mic from her trench coat.)
Kathleen Parks: "This is a strange night. Dragonatrix pulls money from her glove along with handcuffs from her wrestling boot and our esteemed CEO Angela continues to pull a cordless mic from her trench coat. Did they go to school at Hogwarts?"
Glamorous Glenda: "I can always look into it."
Michelle Williams: "You forget she always has a cordless mic with her."
Angela: "So how did you enjoy that exciting battle between Dragonatrix and Neela Shizeguma....."
(The ringsiders roar.)
Angela: "I knew you would enjoy the match since that's the kind of true action SWAT Amazons has to offer. Okay now for something both interesting and quite bizarre at best but Tornado Red wanted this kind of match and well they say careful what you wish for...."
Ringsiders: "You just might get it."
Angela: "Yeah but I added a twist like I usually do. Originally Alice and Tornado Red were supposed to be in the match as a one on one. However, newcomers Alexis Rage and 'Total Package' Kimberly Sparks and Lucky Linda have all made an impression. I thought I would make it quite interesting so I added an interesting twist to make it more competitive."
(The ringsiders cheer.)
Angela: "Now apparently an individual named Mr. Green, who is quite a well known manager, and I do know his reputation as a manager of many champions in various promotions. Anyway, he lobbied for Kimberly to be in this match and as I mentioned I allowed her to be entered into this match. Besides, I gave Lucky Linda the opportunity to get a briefcase by defeating me. So why not allow two newcomers to debut and make an impact which is what these two Money in the Bank briefcases are hanging in opposite corners."
(The ringsiders cheer.)
Angela: "Of course in the other two corners are the title and the frying pan. Whoever gets both the title and the frying pan wins the title and the match to become SWAT Amazons Women's Champion."
(The ringsiders roar as she looks around nodding and pauses with a bIt of a subdued look.)
Angela: "Now I just got word also that this will be the last SWAT Amazons matches I shall make......"
(The ringsiders react shocked as Angela holds up her hand to silence everyone.)
Angela: "No I wasn't fired. On the contrary I just got word I was tapped to run a new SWAT acquisition called XWCW also known as X-Treme West Coast Championship Wrestling. SWAT WEST COAST!!!
I am going to build this new region to the same heights as the great Amazons! However, be assured whoever is in charge of SWAT Amazons I know the individual who is tapped to run this region shall do just as good a job. I plan on watching the action for the very last time next to the broadcast crew and be there to reward the winner and name the General Manager of SWAT Amazons."
(The ringsiders cheer.)
Angela: "Be assured it was my choice and I accepted the offer myself. Now there may be a women's tournament in the near future but that's up to the higher ups and details are being hammered out. However, right now we have a match to determine the SWAT Amazons Women's Champion. Let's enjoy this action packed match."
(Angela leaves the ring as Frank Salazar enters.)
Michelle Williams: "Well that was an interesting development involving Angela's sudden departure along with the last minute change in the match dynamic and possibly a women's tournament in the near future."
Kathleen Parks: "Scandalous is more like it. I mean how could she leave us hanging like that with our future in the hands of......"
Michelle Williams: "Who is the new GM??? I mean, what if its Red? She cant be in charge? Can she?"
Kathleen Parks: "Your words not mine. Plus Glamorous Glenda has to be in that tournament."
Glamorous Glenda: "Yeah I'm well known, good looking and......"
Michelle Williams: "A scrub too....."
Glamorous Glenda: "Yeah a.....What! I'm not a loser."
Michelle Williams: "The memo went out and the scrub division is going to be eliminated....."
Kathleen Parks: "What does the mean."
Michelle Williams: "Exactly what the memo said. You did get the memo."
Kathleen Parks: "I lost mine in the e-mail deletion....."
Glamorous Glenda: "Yeah and I forgot to check my text messages."
Michelle Williams: "She sent it buy printed copy on paper I might add so there wouldn't be any excuses."
(Angela sits down next to them.)
Angela: "That's exactly what I did and they were hand delivered to everyone while they were in the locker room and to you in their offices. I'll make sure you get a few copies as reminders."
Michelle Williams: "Well right now let's go to the ring for the introductions in CEO Angela's final match of her SWAT Amazons tenure."
Frank Salazar : "This next match is scheduled for one fall and it's a Frying Pan/Money in the Bank Briefcase Match. The winner can only be awarded the title if they can get both the frying pan and the championship belt. Whoever gets the briefcases are ranked in the standings for a shot at the title and a guaranteed rematch clause. Now for the introductions. First from Gardner, Mass. She comes in at 5'9" and weighs 173lbs. She is making her SWAT Amazons debut Alexis Rage."
("Welcome To The Jungle" plays and Alexis Rage comes to ringside dressed in black to a chorus of boos. She flips off the fans before entering the ring and mounting a rope raising her fist in the air.)
Michelle Williams: "There's our first official look at Alexis Rage making her SWAT Amazons debut."
Angela: "I expect good things from her and if she can impress the new GM of SWAT Amazons. She probably has potential to go a long way."
Kathleen Parks: "Can I mention that there's someone in that ring right now who's now more worse than Tornado Red and Alice gimmick wise. She also interrupted a Tornado Red's match with Suzi Spitz at the tribute show just to introduce herself I might add."
Angela: "I can't go anything about that."
Frank Salazar: "Now introducing from Louisville, Kentucky. She comes in at 5'9" and weighs 132lbs. She is also making her SWAT Amazons debut. She is 'The Total Package' Kimberly Sparks."
(The music "Thunder Struck" by ACDC begins to play as multi-colored lights begin to flash around the arena to the rhythm of the music playing. When in the song they shout "Thunder"....Simulated lightning bolts strike the stage erupting in fire bursts....an image of a white star with the words Future Icon is in the center stage. As the music turns to the main song, smoke rises from the star as Kimberly Sparks rises from beneath the stage. Hood pulled over her head as she looks down. She removes the hood and jacket and raises her head raises her fist in the air and poses for her new fans as two more lightning bolts strike the stage once more into fire bursts. She then makes her way to ringside high fiving her new fans along the way. Sliding under the bottom rope, she climbs the turnbuckle and poses once more for her fans to take pictures. She is wearing a white sports top, white sports tights, with a electric bolt one leg and the word Spark on the other leg, and white boots with a star symbol on each and Future Icon written on them.)
Michelle Williams: "If you're going to make an entrance might as well do it in a huge way and impress the boss. The thing is you have to prove yourself in the ring first and what a way to do it if you win the title or earn respect by getting a briefcase."
Kathleen Parks: "What an egomaniac who thinks so highly of herself. I mean did you see that entrance as if she's some kind of rockstar or worse a diva."
Glamorous Glenda: "I agree she's a rookie and not a rockstar veteran with diva aspirations."
Angela: "We'll see since I'm not going to be here to criticize any of the roster or judge anyone. Besides Mr. Green introduced her and if Mr. Green trained her that means she must be that good. So we'll see who comes out on top in this match."
Frank Salazar : "Now introducing from Dallas, TX. She comes in at 5'8" and weighs in at 165lbs. Alice."
("Gitty Up" by Salt N' Peppa Feat Rufus Blaque and Alice bounds out to the entranceway, pumping her left arm in the air to the beat, she jiggles her way down the rampway to the beat high fiving the fans on the way, slides under the bottom rope and crawls to the turnbuckle, climbing each one from her knees to her feet, sexily mounting the second turnbuckle and posing for the crowd as they cheer her.)
Michelle Williams: "Alice gets her best chance to win the SWAT Amazons Women's Championship."
Kathleen Parks: "Here's to the possibility of debacle part two with all four making this match a possible disaster."
Angela: "Let's just say that we'll see a new commissioner and an excellent championship match."
Glamourous Glenda: "You mean......"
Angela: "I'm not saying anything and if you do those are your own words not mine."
("Mind Your Own Business" by C & C Music Factory plays and Tornado Red appears on rampway and runs down the ring red hair flying as she high fives the ringsiders despite a mixed reaction from the ringsiders. Tornado Red is wearing a multi-colored dress and black knee high boots. She does a jumping slide into the ring and goes to a neutral corner.)
Frank Salazar : "And introducing the Amazons Champion ... TORNADOOOO REDDDDDDDDD!!!!
("Linger Cranberries" plays and "Lucky" Linda La Fey comes to ringside and she enters the ring and gives the referee her briefcase.)
Michelle Williams: "This is a surprise since Linda never mentioned that she was going to cash in her briefcase."
Angela: "She mentioned it to me and I added her to the match also at the last moment. Believe me she's the wild card in the match."
Kathleen Parks: "Well if she's as good as she was in her debut against you. She could walk out as the new champion tonight."
Glamourous Glenda: "Anyone can be the champion after tonight."
Michelle Williamd: "This sport can be very unpredictable."
Angela: "Definitely."
Michelle Williams: "Well that theory will be tested tonight."
Angela: "Like I said definitely."
Michelle Williams: "The bell sounds and this match is underway. As predictable Alice and Tornado Red go at it exchanging lightning quick left punches forcing Tornado red into the ropes. Alice clotheslines Tornado Red and herself over the top rope and out of the ring."
Kathleen Parks: "Kimberly Sparks and 'Lucky' Linda La Fey go after Alexis Rage who counters with a double clothesline. She drops a couple of elbows onto each of their chests followed by a series of legdrops to their chests for good measure."
Glamorous Glenda: "Tornado Red and Alice continue their brawl outside the ring and all over the ringside area. Tornado Red attempts to whip Alice into the ring post but Alice reverses it sending Tornado Red into the ring post. She charges in with a clothesline but Tornado Red dodges out of the way and she crashes into the rin gpost. Tornado red sets Alice up and she suplex's her onto the ring steps and she follows up by setting up Alice again and suplex's her onto the hard concrete floor."
Michelle Williams: "Tornado Red again sets up Alice and she suplex's her again onto the hard concrete floor again for good measure. She re-enters the ring and dropkicks Alexis Rage who simply turns around and the look on her face is that of pure rage. She seems unaffected by that dropkick and the clothesline that follows. Alexis bellows and thumps her chest before delivering a clothesline that sends her 360degrees to the canvas."
Kathleen Parks: "Kimberly and Linda double clothesline her from behind and then throw kicks at her legs and knees chopping her down to size onto her knees before opening up a double can of whoop ass on Alexis. Tornado Red double clotheslines Linda and Kimberly and opens up a triple can of whoop ass on Kimberly, Linda and Alexis."
Glamorous Glenda: "I guess nobody remembered that Alice is still in the match. She re-enters the ring and she clotheslines Tornado Red from behind and is now opening up a can of whoop ass on the other four competitors. I wonder if there's a blue plate special on whoop ass tonight since a lot of it's being served in this match."
Michelle Williams: "I guess it is. Alice is on fire and she lets out a war cry and thumps her chest. She whips Tornado Red into the ropes and she clotheslines Tornado Red out of her boots. She waits for Linda and Kimberly and she double clotheslines them too and then clotheslines Alexis."
Kathleen Parks: "Alice leaves the ring and she finds a chair and slides it into the ring. She waits and she starts delivering chair shots to everyone but she saves the most vicious chair shots for Tornado Red. She once again leaves the ring and she finds a steel rod and starts hitting everyone else in the ring. Once again she saves the most vicious shots for Tornado Red. She follows up immediately by delivering even more vicious shots to Tornado Red's back and neck."
Glamorous Glenda: "I guess this proves beyond a shadow of a doubt the these two hate each others guts. Alice turns her attention to Alexis Rage, Kimberly Sparks and 'Lucky' Linda La Fey. She continues to go to town with that steel rod and she's being relentless with those head shots."
Michelle Williams: "Tornado Red recovers enough to sneak up on Alice and delivers a series of low blows and she tosses Alice through the ropes and out of the ring. She turns around and gets a big boot by Alexis who throws her out of the ring. She sees Linda charging at her and scoops her up and running gorilla presses her out of the ring onto both Alice and Tornado Red."
Kathleen Parks: "Kimberly dropkicks Alexis and as she turns around Kimberly delivers some vicious shots with that steel rod and continues to hit her with a vengeance. She whips Alexis who reverses it and whips Kimberly into a corner and train wrecks her. She whips Kimberly into the opposite corner but Kimberly gets her knees up and she climbs to the top turnbuckle and comes off with a dropkick. She waits and executes a flying face plant into the canvas."
Glamorous Glenda: "Kimberly drops a few knees and elbows onto Alexis back and neck before she drops a series of knees onto Alexis's neck before she goes for the cover."
Michelle Williams: "I guess she forgot that she needs to get the frying pan and the title to win the match. Linda comes in to make the save despite the fact you can't pin your opponent in this match. She delivers a series of relentless leg drops to Alexis and Kimberly. She leaves the ring and looks under the ring apron and finds a bunch of light tubes. She re-enters the ring and she smashes the light tubes over both Alexis's and Kimberly's heads."
Kathleen Parks: "She digs the light tube's sharp end into Alexis's head cutting her open and she continues to make that cut worse. Linda picks up some of the shards and she rubs them into Kimberly's head relentlessly and shredding her head open and making her bleed just as badly. Those cuts are quite ugly and will probably get worse as the match goes on."
Glamorous Glenda: "Alexis surprises Linda with a low blow and smashes a light tube over she picks up some of the shards and rubs them into Linda's head making her bleed badly and continues doing so. Linda's cut and that wound is going to get ugly as the match goes along too. Linda counters with a Thai clinch and knees Alexis relentlessly and she bites Alexis's head and spits whatever got into her mouth out into her eyes. She uses the steel rod again to smash Alexis in the stomach with it and does the same with Kimberly as she gets up before smashing them both in the head repeatedly with that steel rod."
Michelle Williams: "Alice enters the ring again and clotheslines Linda. She grabs the steel rod and smashes Linda over the head repeatedly with it. She goes after Tornado Red and does to the diner with it smashing Tornado Red again with vicious shots to the head and back. She finds another light tube and she uses it to smash it over Tornado Red's head."
Kathleen Parks: "Alice breaks the light tube over Tornado Red's head and then rubs and scrapes her head with some of the shards. At least Alice does an excellent job cleaning or at least making Tornado Red's cut as ugly as possible and boy is she bleeding. She sets up Tornado Red and she suplex's her on top of Alexis Rage. She goes over to Kimberly and scoop body slams Linda on top of her before going to the top rope and she comes off with a cannonball."
Glamorous Glenda: "Alice goes over to where Tornado Red and Alexis Rage is and she climbs the top rope again and she cannonballs the two of them too. That should take the air out of all of them. She doesn't care who she goes through as long as she can win the title."
Michelle Williams: "Alice leaves the ring and brings in a ladder and she waits as everyone slowly gets up. She charges and she smashes the ladder into Tornado Red and Alexis and she swings the ladder hitting Linda and Kimberly. She sets up the ladder and she starts to climb it."
Kathleen Parks: "Alice wants to win in the worst possible way she can. She comes off and she leg drops Tornado Red's neck and starts climbing the ladder again as Linda stirs and she charges and tackles the ladder sending Alice into the ringside seating area."
Glamorous Glenda: "Let's hope there's no lawsuits for the new management to handle. Linda sets the ladder up and she starts to climb the ladder as Kimberly stirs and now Linda comes off with a leg drop of her own to Linda's neck. Alexis waits for Linda to get up and she delivers a painful spear to Linda."
Michelle Williams: "Linda rolls out of the ring in pain from that spear. Alexis whips Kimberly into the ropes but misses with a clothesline and Kimberly ducks another clothesline and comes off the ropes and she counters with a flying leg clothesline. She was just as Lucky as Linda because she almost had her head taken off by that Mac Truck Alexis."
Kathleen Parks: "Kimberly sets up the ladder onto Alexis and she goes to the top rope and she executes a beautiful shooting star press onto Alexis. She's seems to be willing to put her body on the line to win this match in order to impress you."
Angela: "I'm quite impressed and I know the new management will be too."
Kathleen Parks: "Kimberly leaves the ring and finds another ladder and slides it into the ring. She starts to set it up as Tornado Red stirs and stumbles over and they start to trade punches and elbows."
Glamorous Glenda: "Alice makes her way back to the ringside area and she goes under the apron and she re-enters with a baseball bat as Linda finds a tire iron. She re-enters the ring and I don't think Alice is just taking swings to try out for a baseball team and Linda isn't intending to use that tire iron to fix anyone's tires anytime soon. They both connect with their shots to both Tornado Red's and Kimberly's shoulderblades.
Michelle Williams: "Alexis just set up the ladder again and she starts climbing towards that title. Linda and Alice go over and shake that ladder and Alexis.......Abandon table! Here comes Air Alexis crashing down towards us!......"
(Alexis crashes through the commentator's table as Michelle, Kathleen, Glenda and Angela flee the table.)
Kathleen Parks: "Okay we got the symbolic commentator's table destroyed out of the way. Now let's see if anymore tables get destroyed. Tornado Red reaches under her dress and she pulls out a rolling pin.....How do the wrestlers get these things into their wrestling attire."
Angela: "Don't ask me how. They seem to have plenty of creative ways of doing that."
Kathleen Parks: "Ho boy. Tornado Red swings and hits Alice and Linda repeatedly with it. She's delivering even more vicious shots to Alice as payback earlier. She continues to club their backs repeatedly with it and now she goes under her dress again and she pulls out a pizza slicer. Give me a break does she have the whole kitchen under her wrestling attire."
Angela: "Like I said don't ask me."
Glamorous Glenda: "Now I've seen everything. Tornado Red grips Alice by the hair and she uses it to slice her head open and now Alice is bleeding badly. I'll never look at another gourmet pizza the same way ever again. Kimberly just made her way over to the ladder in the opposite corner and she sets it up again and starts climbing it as Alexis stirs."
Michelle Williams: " Alexis sees Kimberly climbing and stumbles back towards the ring and she reaches the corner as Kimberly sees her. She executes a dropkick off the top of the ladder and sends Alexis back onto the hard concrete floor and Kimberly looks hurt as well."
Angela: "That's the ultimate risk taking competitor that management likes."
Michelle Williams: "Meanwhile in the ring Linda charges and she spears Tornado Red. She sets the ladder on top of Tornado Red and climbs the turnbuckle and what is she doing."
Kathleen Parks: "She waits on top of the turnbuckle and she comes off with a double stomp onto the ladder.....Shades of the Demon King Finn Balor. She sees Alice charging and she unleashes a jumping Brogue Kick....Shades of Sheamus that was impressive to take Alice down with that kick. She waits and let's loose an IRA Kick."
Glamorous Glenda: "Linda leaves the ring and she finds a table and slides it in. Looks like we'll have our quota of tables being destroyed met. She goes under the apron again and pulls out two chair and finds a bag with something along with an oil can and lighter along with some chairs. She opens up the bag and spills the tacks onto the table over the table and uses the oil and lighter to set those chairs on fire."
Michelle Williams: "She has a frightening look on her face as she yells and powerbombs Tornado Red through the tacks and those burning chairs. Alexis rolls back into the ring and she clotheslines Linda from behind. She has a bag of her own and spills the contents before face planting Linda's face into those tacks."
Kathleen Parks: "So far nobody has an advantage. Alexis tosses Kimberly out of the ring unceremoniously but turns around and gets blasted by Alice executing a running Slaughter Cannon and sends Alexis out of the ring onto Kimberly. We can now declare this match an all out brawl."
Glamourous Glenda: "Kimberly slowly forces Alexis off of her and gets up and waits and executes a jumping DDT. She looks under the ring and she finds a sledgehammer before re-entering the ring.....Uh oh the look on her face is frightening to say the least."
Michelle Williams: "Kimberly waits and jams the head of the sledgehammer into Tornado Red's stomach and then into Alice's stomach and then Linda's. She slams it into their backs hard before throwing it down and setting the ladder up again. Linda stirs and she goes up the ladder matching Kimberly stride for stride. Both are close to being halfway up the ladder.."
Kathleen Parks: "Linda delivers a wedgie before getting under Kimberly and she sets her up and she electric chairs herself and Kimberly off of the ladder and into the remains of the burning table and chairs and it doesn't help with those tacks either. Linda then mounts and delivers a brutal ground and pound onto Kimberly. She sees the sledgehammer and the same look Kimberly had is now on Linda's."
Glamorous Glenda: "Someone hire an exorcist since that sledgehammer could be cursed. Linda jams the head into Kimberly's stomach repeatedly. Tornado Red sets up the ladder in the opposite corner and starts climbing towards the frying pan. Alice charges and she knocks over the ladder sending Tornado Red along with the frying pan out of the ring and onto the hard concrete floor. She lands on a stirring Alexis Rage and that may not bode well unless she uses the frying pan on her head which she does."
Michelle Williams: "Linda is halfway up the ladder and she's determined to get that title belt if she only remembers to get the frying pan to complete the victory. Alice sees her and storms over towards the ladder as Linda reaches for the championship title belt. She leaps and grabs it just as Alice knocks the ladder over and sends Linda out of the ring into the timekeeper's table destroying it in the process."
Kathleen Parks: "Can the bell ring now to end this match."
Angela: "Oh no both the frying pan and the championship belt must be in possession of one combatant before the match ends."
Kathleen Parks: "I was afraid you'd say that. Tornado Red continues to use the frying pan to beat Alexis with it not realizing that Linda has the championship title."
Glamorous Glenda: "Kimberly pulls something out of her tights. She waits for Alice and then sprays what's in it into Alice's face. Alice is flailing her arms and she looks blinded by what was in that bottle or whatever it was that she was holding."
Michelle Williams: "Kimberly finds the sledgehammer and she waits for Alice to turn around and she again jams it into her stomach repeatedly and tosses Alice out of the ring unceremoniously. She psyches herself up and she looks at both briefcases trying to decide which one to go for. Alice grabs at anything and snatches a bottle of Suzi Spitz Spring Water from one of the wrestling fans. She splashes it into her eyes and still feels some of the sting of that substance Kimberly used."
Kathleen Parks: "Looks like we found another use for Suzi's endorsed spring water. I can see the pitch now: 'If you got something in your eyes compliments of an opponent. Try Suzi Spitz Spring Water and your eyes will be close to better in no time.' Seriously, Linda straps the title belt around her waist to prevent anyone from taking it and she goes under the ring apron and finds a sheet pan. She sneaks up on Tornado Red and she smashes her repeatedly with the sheet pan and grabs for the frying pan."
Glamorous Glenda: "Tornado Red keeps a death grip on it and they wrestle with intensity as if they're both trying to decide who's going to be cooking dinner. Alice re-enters the ring and she sees the ladder but doesn't know which briefcase is which being she's still partially blinded by that substance. She stumbles towards the ladder and barely keeps it from tipping over. She doesn't see Kimberly, who is almost up the ladder. Alice sees Kimberly and decides to knock the ladder over and she sends Kimberly out of the ring and her throat bounces hard off the security guard railing. Alice sets up the ladder again and she climbs it with a purpose and she grabs the briefcase. Which ranking will Alice get this time and how upset will she be if she can't get the title."
Angela: "She has the best briefcase and believe me that briefcase is a very special one."
Glamorous Glenda: "How special is it."
Angela: "I'm not telling what's in it until the end of the match."
Michelle Williams: "Linda just kicks Tornado Red low and she finally wrests the frying pan out of her hands. Kimberly manages to stumble towards the ring and she re-enters the ring still feeling the effects of that fall into the security railing. She struggles to get that ladder up and positioned under the other briefcase."
Kathleen Parks: "Kimberly's climbing with a purpose as Alexis recovers and slowly rolls back into the ring. Kimberly's reached the briefcase and is struggling to grab it. Alexis storms over and trainwrecks the ladder as Kimberly barely grabs it but the briefcase falls down and lands in the center of the ring while Kimberly lays in the opposite corner of the ring."
Glamorous Glenda: "Alexis Rage barely keeps that ladder from falling on her. They both are eying the briefcase and it's contents. They circle and keeping an eye on the other daring the other to make the first move. Who's going to break this Mexican Standoff if beyond me."
Kathleen Parks: "Didn't you say that the match would end if the winner gets the frying pan and the title belt which 'Lucky' Linda La Fey did."
Angela: "I'm not going to ruin the match when these two rookies are trying to battle for a title shot and a rematch clause."
Michelle Williams: "The two collide in the center of the ring and exchange punches and elbows. Alexis manages to overpower Kimberly and forces her into the ropes and she continues to pummel her hard with lefts and rights. Kimberly counters with a Thai Clinch and delivers some powerful knees and then some elbows to the back of Alexis's neck."
Kathleen Parks: "Alexis counters by taking her legs out and she starts to mount Kimberly grounding and pounder her relentlessly. Kimberly attempts to counter by wrapping her arm around her head and clamp on a choke. They grapple in the ropes and attempt to maneuver each other on the canvas. Alexis barely lifts and powerbombs her breaking the hold."
Glamorous Glenda: "They continue to circle and eye each other as if daring the other to make the first strike. I guess we can't add silly comic book dialogue, costumes and comic action words so they can rehearse their cosplay at the next comicon. Kimberly dodges a swing by Alexis and she swings the sledgehammer and connects with Alexis's back. She follows up with a shot to her chest and throat."
Michelle Williams: "Kimberly goes behind Alexis and she barely executes a German suplex with overhead throw into the remnants of that burning table or what's left of it. She psyches herself up and follows up with sledgehammer shots to her knees and crotch. Kimberly adds another shot for good measure before she picks Alexis up and she sets her up for a pedigree.....Shades of Triple H she executes it perfectly."
Kathleen Parks: "Kimberly adds another shot to her mid-section for good measure before she psyches herself up again and heads for the briefcase. She reaches it and she picks up the briefcase and the bell finally rings. Thank you and now let's find out who the new GM, Commissioner or whatever the new position is officially."
Frank Salazar : "Your winner at 31minutes and the New Swat Amazons Women's Champion. 'Lucky' Linda La Fey."
Michelle Williams: "'Lucky' Linda La Fey risked her briefcase and as luck would have it she won the SWAT Amazons Women's Championship."
Angela: "You said the sport is unpredictable and it proved to be just that...."
Glamorous Glenda: "What could possibly go wrong?"
Michelle Williams: "Does Amazon Domination's Money in the Bank match ring a bell."
Glamorous Glenda: "Well like yeah."
(Angela enters the ring and she waits for the other participants to enter. There's a lot of tension that's running high and the competitors look at each other especially Alice and Tornado Red.)
Angela: "Congratulations for putting on an excellent match that was quite memorable and quite entertaining for all of SWAT to watch. Show no shame for your performance since I know that you not only impressed both me, your former CEO, but also your new GM of SWAT Amazons ... First I want to congratulate you, 'Lucky' Linda La Fey on risking your Money in the Bank briefcase tonight and coming out the new SWAT Amazons Women's Champion. You put on a great effort and now make SWAT Amazons proud."
'Lucky' Linda La Fey: "I shall and be a fighting champion."
Angela: "That's good since you will be facing Neela Shizeguma for the title and the winner of that match faces Suzi Spitz for the title. So you'll be the face of SWAT Amazons for now and I wish you the best. I was assured that series of matches will occur since it's my last act as CEO of SWAT Amazons."
(She shakes Linda's hand and embraces her. She looks at Alice who's expression is not quite pleasant.")
Kathleen Parks: "Trouble's coming....."
Angela: "What seems to be the problem......"
Alice: "I want an immediate title shot....."
(Angela puts a hand on her shoulder and looks her in the eye.)
Angela: "Calm down Alice. You'll have an even bigger role in SWAT Amazons and it's even bigger than being the champion. Believe me Alice. It's going to be quite an important responsibility."
Alice: "I'm not going to cater to anyone especially Tornado Red."
(Security comes between them.)
Angela: "Calm down Alice. It's not that or any other thing that you think. You've got an even more responsible role in SWAT Amazons."
Alice: "I wont wait, not for Neela or Suzi FN Swallows ... not for anyone!"
Angela: I've never steered you wrong or anyone else in SWAT Amazons wrong. I've never disrespected you or anyone else on the roster. Believe me open your briefcase and you'll see what I'm talking about."
(Alice eyes Angela who nods and she cautiously opens up her briefcase and she takes out a series of papers and she reads them a surprised and shocked look on her face as Angela smiles warmly.)
Alice: "What's going on this isn't a title shot or a rematch clause."
(Angela shakes her head and extends her hand.)
Angela: "Read them again and you'll see that this is all real."
(She reads them again.)
Angela: "Congratulations you are the new GM of SWAT Amazons. It's real and that's what I meant by having a bigger role."
Alice: "This is real?"
Angela: "As real as it gets. Honey ... YOURE IN CHARGE!"
(She shakes her hand and embraces her.)
Tornado Red: "This isn't fair at all. She's biased against me and everyone knows it."
(Angela puts up a hand to quiet Tornado Red and she looks her straight in the eye.)
Angela: "First off she grabbed the briefcase Tornado Red and I can't change that. As for her being biased I'll provide a copy of the SWAT Amazons guidelines and she'll study it and she'll decide what's what. There's no bias or conspiracy against you Tornado Red. Trust me on that and you just have to work out your issues with her and you'll get a title rematch someday."
(Linger by the Cranberries hits and Linda La Fey celebrates in the ring, holding the belt high, she heads up the ramp, slapping hands and hugging the fans, she stops at the top of the ramp way, Linger bellowing, and holds the belt high again to the Las Vegas Crowd
WHAM!!!
From behind, SUZI SPITZ!!!
Spitz nails Linda with a double ax handle ... she hoists Linda up and slams her hard onto the steel entrance way with a devastating powerbomb, hangs onto the legs, and applies a sharpshooter.
THE BITCHMAKER!!)
Suzi Spitz : (releasing the hold and staring with disdain down on Linda, then into the crowd) You may of just got LUCKY and climbed a ladder for that belt! But you didnt win it, not from ME!
That belt belongs to ME! Red never defeated me for it either, she didnt win, i lost. But now, IMMMMMMM BAAAAACK!!!
And that belt will be mine, again! As will the Two Million Dollars i keep hearing about being up for grabs in January. You say Tournament, i say give me the money!
(Suzi stomps on Linda some more as security rush the stage and hold her back)
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SWAT Team
.::XHF Superstar::.
The Promise Land
Posts: 2,416
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Post by SWAT Team on Mar 23, 2019 20:40:55 GMT -5
{{Even with Bueller offline, that was a spirited test run before the big rumble. Spot number 30. Walking through the hallways, Attila Balan still isn't sure what to do with his prize. He enjoys performing for the SWAT fans, and coming out last, while significantly improving his chances of victory, cuts into the time he spends with them. Throwing a towel across his neck, Balan gets into trainer mode. The wonderful mechanical man who is kind to all but hates natures has no time to worry about golden tickets, he has other gold on his mind. Buster Friendly is going to be the next Atlantic Coast heavyweight champion, even if Balan fries all his circuits getting him there.}}
Vile "Vince" Viper: Hey Attila! How is that meth lab utility belt coming?
AB: You were taunting a mass produced replica of me, Vincent.
Vile "Vince" Viper: Sssssssssssssso you're saying you can't do it?
{{Damn him. Attila Balan will rise to the occasion.}}
AB: If you will excuse me, Vincent. I have to get back to Buster. Tonight could be the crowning achievement in his journey to personal betterment.
Vile "Vince" Viper: Where is Bozo? I haven't ssseen him around. You have him on lockdown detoxing or something? Or maybe he's holding someone againssst their will...........
AB: What?
Vile "Vince" Viper: Nevermind. You're a good guy, right Attila? You like championing just causes... like indusssssstry. I was just...
AB: No.
Vile "Vince" Viper <ignoring him>: In this scenario, I am indussstry. Now yes or no, there will be no hard feelings, but you see---
AB: I will be too busy preparing Buster for the Psychotic Goth to help defend you against the KGB.
Vile "Vince" Viper: COME ON!
AB: Absolutely not.
Vile "Vince" Viper: I hear the KGB doesn't do steroids, thossse absss? They're ALL NATURAL!
AB: Forget it, Vincent. I have more pressing engagements than helping you. Besides, you have been doing everything in your power to run the Atlantic Coast region out of business since you got here. If an angry mob tries to lynch you and set you on fire, that is the correct action within angry mob parameters. Stop booking Buster for your ridiculous backstage shows, and look strongly into leaving town.
Vile "Vince" Viper: ...
AB: ...
{{Maybe if Old Scratch looks sad enough, Balan will bow to his request. TripleV really looks pathetic. A long awkward silence ensues.}}
Vile "Vince" Viper: ...
AB: ...
Vile "Vince" Viper: ...
AB: ...
Vile "Vince" Viper: I HOPE YOU RUST!
{{Your king of snakes stomps off looking for more sympathetic parties, while Balan thinks about how to implement a meth lab into his utility belt, and if it can be used as an incentive to get Buster Friendly to train.}}
" F E A R
T H E
R E J E C T I O N
O F
T H E
I N D U S T R I A L
M A N "
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SWAT Team
.::XHF Superstar::.
The Promise Land
Posts: 2,416
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Post by SWAT Team on Mar 23, 2019 20:41:40 GMT -5
( Out of No Where Highway to Hell by ACDC plays and the crowd erupts for the man coming out Hells Bouncer )
Jeremy Tucker- Wait a minute what is Hells Bouncer doing out here, he won his earlier match to Bishop earlier tonight and now he out here and has a microphone.
Andrew Fulton- You mean he stole the win to Bishop but anyway here is Hells Bouncer, what does he have to say this time.
Hells Bouncer- Hello everyone here tonight.
( crowds erupting and cheering )
Hells Bouncer- I have few reasons I decided to come out here for and I will make them known right now. Thank You Pecsi I knew you see great talent and giving me the Number 1 spot in the Royal Rumble, your a wise man and know what the people want to see and that is me to destroy and dominate the Rumble and winning it. So thank You Pesci.
Jeremy Tucker- But I will not put money that HB wins the Rumble he has a lot of good talent to go through.
Hells Bouncer- KGB seems to be having lot of problems tonight though since I defeated a man who claimed he got this well tonight HB got One up on you all so what do you think about that SoutterPuss. You think you got the brains in this group and I have already defeated one of your own members. So what are you going to do put me through Hell each week to satisfy your dumb ass. Well bring it because I know soon I will be the face and World Champion or any champion in this company.
Andrew Fulton- Boy is HB making his early grave, thinking he can do it all and become World Champion. I have got to see this all transpire. Good Luck though HB.
Hells Bouncer- And finally my reasoning of being here and I wanted to make this short and sweet and I think I did was because we have a new member in the company known as Matt Ryno, he been running his mouth off on facebook and anywhere he can get attention and think he going to run rough shot over the company. So I say to Pecsi or Soutter or whoever the match makers are to put me up against Ryno and he will learn not to screw with me, just like the Royal Rumble participants and like anyone else. No one is stopping me from becoming World Champion and Ryno or Goth or anyone can do about it. SoutterPuss who you making me face off next week to I want to know by end of show.
( drops mic as Highway to Hell plays and HB heads to dressing rooms )
Andrew Fulton- Man he is making lots of demands and I can only imagine if Hells Bouncer will have his next opponent named tonight or whenever. We will see but now we can continue on with our show.
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SWAT Team
.::XHF Superstar::.
The Promise Land
Posts: 2,416
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Post by SWAT Team on Mar 23, 2019 20:41:54 GMT -5
[As we return a yellow serpent coils around the top rope, feeling out the rungs of the steel cable with its tongue. A master shot reveals that the ring has been transformed, covered in snakes - that while probably not poisonous, certainly enjoy the kind of numbers required to remind one of Raiders of the Lost Ark. Plastic barricades have been put up to keep the set pieces from slithering out into the crowd, but as the bulky frames of boa constrictors cause the shields to creek, the audience is looking rather uncomfortable. Atlantic Coast can't afford these kinds of visuals, why on earth would they turn their ring into this serpentine hell?]
[To one up Suit's Suite of course!]
[In the center of the ring, The DEVIL of SWAT is decked out in a very masculine outfit that looks a lot like Maleficent but is very masculine, I swear. Our Disney villain sits upon a massive throne made out of onyx. John Hammond: "We Spared no Expense!" More reptiles wrap themselves around the throne's arms, but the wild life doesn't bother our king of snakes. Its a magnificent sight to behold, and as TripleV looks up at the heavens you already know his interview segment is a million times better than that douche Soutter.]
VVV: Ladiessssssssssssssss and gentlemen... wait... this is Vegasss right? Do over! Whores and Losers, degenerate gamblers one and all... please put your gaudy, filthy, thieving hands together in celebrating THIS... THE PYTHON'SSS PIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
[The audience isn't cheering, but Old Scratch is getting some reaction.]
VVV: Who did Sssoutter have out for the last one? Oh right <snort> the clown... well, he's welcome to the challengers, but we believe in bringing in champions, so lets give it up for my guest this week...
P S S S Y C H O T I C
G O T H !! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !
["Welcome to your Death" by Annihilator pumps over the PA system as Psychotic Goth makes his way down to the Pit.]
VVV: Thanks for joining us champ, I know what a busy schedule you training for that pathetic wannabe liver recipient Bozo later.
Psychotic Goth: Beelzebozo was never known until I uttered is very name and then he suddenly calls me out. My answer to him is anytime you wish Beelzebozo and I shall face you in the ring. You call yourself the Shepard of Lost Souls ad you are pathetic if you take Marcus White under your stinking pants. I, on the other hand, am a tortured soul who knows who he is and is true to himself.
I don't hide behind a cheap Pennywise get up or Bozo the Clown act. I am true to myself and my culture.
VVV <getting serious>: You know, we like to clown around here on The Python's Pit - but tonight I'd like to take a much more somber tone, because much like your opponent this evening, there is absolutely nothing funny about your recent situation. I know I speak for everyone here when I say, our hearts go out to you over Vampira'sss recent disappearance.
Psychotic Goth: I don't like pity. You see when a king's queen is abducted do you think he's going to stand around and wait for a ransom demand. No. The King of the Goths goes on a rampage that hasn't been seen since the bloody wars of Charlemagne. You remember The Trojan War where Helen was kidnapped from Menalaus of Sparta. There was a bloody war that ended with Troy destroyed and all was chronicalled in history and myth. I decided to go on a bloody rampage to find out who did it and why. I vow to find her no matter who is hurt or mauled during my bloody rampage. You see I shall continue to ravage all the lands until I find my queen and return her to my kingdom.
VVV <crossing arms>: Have you received any clues about her whereabouts? Its shrouded in so much mystery. A ransom note perhaps? Something from the kidnappers?
Psychotic Goth: I don't care about ransom notes or any other forms of communication. I'm one who commits carnage as an answer to anyone's demands or notes. You see I don't care for notes or any other form of communication as long as they answer for their crime. You see the rampage and carnage I reaped upon all of ACW. You've seen the damage I committed on all who stand in my way and I don't care what anyone thinks. I do my own searching and I don't give up until I have gotten what I came for and that's the return of my queen."
VVV <allowing a snake to wrap itself around his arm>: I hate to pry, but when you charge these many snakes to the company, they expect hard hitting journalism. Not me, them. Do you have any leads on possssssible culpritsss? Old enemies that could be coming back? When it first occurred, my gut reaction was Damian Payne, but you two seem to have forged a mutual ressspect. Do you have any other suspicions? This level of antiquated misogyny certainly seems like it would be right up the KGB's alley. With all due respect, everyone saw how Sssoutter looked at Vampira...
Psychotic Goth: Unlike all of SWAT I love snakes along with my queen. Yes I do have respect for Damian Payne. I admire his hardcore style and I love hardcore as well as the violence and bloodshed and gore. He is the epitome of what real hardcore is and so I am too. I love violence and bloodshed like him. He felt he deserved a title shot against me and I'm all for that too at anytime and anyplace in SWAT. Now as for your question everyone is a suspect in my eyes. You see I'm going to find out who it is that took my queen and when that happens. I shall destroy them and I shall make sure the punishment is painful. If it's the KGB and it could be. I shall make sure they pay the ultimate price and I do mean the ultimate price. If Soutter was behind it he shall be the one who's overstuffed body shall be roasted on a spit and he shall be the ultimate shrimp on the barbie. Like I also said everyone is a suspect.....Unless.....
VVV <holding up arms>: Not trying to poke the bear, just trying to get to the heart of the matter. Vampira is a VERY TOUGH woman, easily the equal of any of SSSWAT'SS AMAZONSSS... for her to be abducted, it would have to be more than one assailant. Who works in a gang? The first one that springs to my mind is Sssoutter and his KGB. You say everyone'sss a sssussspect? I couldn't agree more.
Psychotic Goth: Yes my queen is a very tough woman and she's very violent and savage in her own right. Like I said everyone is a suspect and I continue to rampage through SWAT and everyone who tries to take advantage of me. Anyone who thinks I shall fall for any comments about my queen shall be seeing themselves in a coma between life and death. Heaven and Hell. If they are lucky to have security around I shall be safe if not........
(He bellows in a strange tongue)
If not I shall make sure they never see the next day ever again. That means all of SWAT including you if I find out who it is and let's hope it isn't you.
VVV <shakes head> Of courssse. Now I lie A LOT. It's part of my charm. I haven't said many truths since coming back to SWAT... but there is one thing that I have always been brutally honessst about.
[Rising from his onyx throne, VVV stands face to face with Psychotic Goth.]
VVV: ...I FUCKING HATE the Atlantic Coassst. The only good thing this region had going for it was you as champion. How have they rewarded your tireless efforts to champion their name? Phoenix LET Vampira be kidnapped, and even if he didn't do it himself, he sure as ssshit hasssn't lifted a finger to help get her back. One man KILLED himself while making Atlantic Coassst a SSSWAT region worth remembering. While you were doing it, making yourself vulnerable by putting your all into that belt, they couldn't even keep an eye on your mussse. Where are the police reportsss? The sssussspended ssshowsss? The ssspot checks? Phoenix seemed more interested in getting television ratings, while Sssoutter pretends that people give a damn about that lame drag queen he has dressed up as Joe Pesssci. Did we have security block off the arena and check every car on the way out? Did we run ads with her picture looking for information? It was more important to run two hundred fucking Pesssci sssegmentsss, because that's what the crowd wants.
A WOMAN IS MISSING AND THOSE TWO CAN'T BE BOTHERED TO RAISE A FUCKING FINGER! Instead they have you testing out new talent on the undercard...
I _HATE_ ATLANTIC COASSST... but since no one else can be bothered to do it... on BEHALF of the Atlantic Coassst, I want to apologize to you Goth. The way Vampira's rescue, and both of your trauma is being handled, is frankly horrific. I can't speak for those sitting duck figureheads, but I will do everything in my power to help you in your search... and when you find the perssson resssponsssible, I'll be happy to hold their arms while you gut them.
[...Psychotic Goth stares at the Devil of SWAT. Is this sinking in? He is listening...]
Psychotic Goth: Do not worry about all that VVV. I vowed to find her myself and I shall find the person or persons who did it and when I do. I shall carry out my vow that I have told you I shall carry out. Yes Phoenix seems to care about the ratings and Soutter prefers to reign attention on himself and the KGB. I already took care of Joe Pesci and he shall never be around SWAT ever again if he dares to even do so. However, I know this quest to recover my queen is a challenge and it's going to be one that I shall accomplish no matter who I destroy. I can see it in your eyes that you want to leave ACW, but there's a new region I heard of and I'm sure the owner will be happy to have your services. Still you and I are under contract and that's what counts and Phoenix controls the contracts that are signed for the roster. Now if you are lying about pitying me that's understandable since you said you lie a lot. I also hate apologies since they aren't so sincere from anyone and as I said I shall be the one who rescues my queen and bring her back safely to my kingdom. Believe me I shall place them in an even worse torture than just gutting them.
[Goth turns to leave, stepping halfway out through the ropes.]
VVV: ...By the way... I wasn't sure if I should show you this footage. We still haven't verified if it is authentic or has been tampered with... though why anyone would tamper with it is hard to guess... but my producer'sss were able to get their hands on some security footage from the night that Vampira disappeared... I think you should see it...
[Up on the SWATaTRON a static laden image of a backstage hallway is shown. There is no audio. Vampira looks visibly upset as she looks around, and frantically tries to make a phone call.]
VVV: ...I keep going back to what kind of man would use a woman against you... who is that cold blooded. Heartless. Impersonal. Mechanical. Persssonally, I'd lean towards the KGB... but there is something to be said for THE RINGERS that Phoenix brought in. She went missing right after those guys showed up...
[Goth looks pale as a ghost starring up at his distraught love. Spotting someone, Vampira runs off camera - the video gets a lot more grainy as what looks like a clown enters the frame. Was that a clown? Its too grainy for us to tell, but Psychotic Goth has made up his mind. Bellowing in rage, the Atlantic Coast champion pushes through ropes, thoughts of murdering Buster Friendly dance through his head.]
VVV <fiendish grin>: ...God ssspeed you psssychotic goth.
[On the next Python's Pit - Beelzebozo - if he's still alive.]
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SWAT Team
.::XHF Superstar::.
The Promise Land
Posts: 2,416
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Post by SWAT Team on Mar 23, 2019 20:42:39 GMT -5
Jeremy Tucker : This has been an amazing night thus far, Andrew... And up next we have a match that has been brewing for a while with animosity on both sides...
Andrew Fulton : Already? I thought we were in for a bigger break, them Amazon commentators could of covered this one too.
Jeremy Tucker : That Amazons action was great! A new Champion in Lucky Linda, and new GM in Alice and the return of Suzie Spitz!!!
Andrew Fulton : Meh... Let's just get on with the match, Jerry... The sooner it's over, the sooner we can move onto something more interesting... Like watching paint dry or something...
Jeremy Tucker : Over to Frank Salazar for the introductions...
Cue: War Ensemble by Slayer
["Knife Edge" Takeda Yokosuda walks confidently out onto the entrance ramp as his music plays over the arena PA system...]
Frank Salazar : This contest is scheduled for one fall... Introducing first... Fighting out of Seattle, Washington and weighing in at 190 pounds... "Knife Edge" Takeda Yokosuda!!!
[Yokouda jogs down to the ring and slides under the bottom rope, popping to his feet and heading or a neutral corner...]
Frank Salazar : His opponent...
Cue: "Ready or Not" by Mischa Chillak (ft Esthero)
[The scene shoots to the ramp way as the arena lights drop to a dark orange... A fast montage of Adam Haven hitting Phoenix seven times in a row in one old uCw match with a steel chair plays as the opening piano notes start...
Fog rolls out and a circle of fire lights on the stage... A flash montage of Phoenix beating the hell out of Soutter in the CWA... At :31 the tron lights up with fiery lettering spelling out;
[bigger]"READY OR NOT HERE I COME YOU CAN'T HIDE"
As Esthero sings those very words, and a flash shot of Phoenix crushing Cobryn with a steel chair appears...
At :42, the heavy kicks in and "Ready or Not by Mischa Chillak revs up... The stage and turnbuckles explode with flame pyro as fast motion clips play of Phoenix delivering the Phoenix Driver to a bevy of opponents, including D-Matic, Matt Griffen, Soutter, Adam Haven, Johnny Styles, RDS, Syberus, Clench, Dustin Hughes, Dan Stein, Tobias Burden, Dave Rave, Mars, Soulfly, Dusty Dynamite, Jace Mingla, Brian Kennedy, Jessica Tendonin, and James Fierce...
Phoenix rises through the circle of flames, down on one knee, head on his fist, wearing a dark red leather vest with "FMP" down one side, a phoenix logo on the back, and his Rosary... He stands up at 1:08 as the crowd roars seeing his black metal bat in his other hand... Phoenix begins making his way down towards the ring as the haze dissipates, arms outstretched, playing up the crowd with a smirk...]
Frank Salazar : Hailing from Red Bank, New Jersey and weighing in at 265 pounds... Phoenix!!!
Phoenix slides into the ring, hops up and hits the turnbuckle to the second rope, pounding his chest then points straight up with a single middle finger salute as the corner behind him explodes in fire... Phoenix hits all four corners, then pulls off the vest, draping it over the ringpost, and places the Rosary over it... He holds the bat aloft before affixing it to a loop hidden inside the vest...]
================================================= SWAT: NEW YEARS NIGHTMARE 2017
PHOENIX VS KNIFE EDGE TAKEDA YOKOSUDA (Grudge match) =================================================
[DING! DING! DING!]
[The two warriors lock up and Yokosuda hits a jawbreaker on Phoenix before following it up with an arm bar takedown... Yokosuda then attempts a gut wrench suplex, but Phoenix blocks it and in turn goes for a tiger driver, but Yokosuda counters it with a backdrop...]
Jeremy Tucker : Both men finding counters early on in this match...
Andrew Fulton : Yes... They know each other fairly well by now, Jerry... It's a game of human chess...
[Yokosuda nails Phoenix with a chop and then goes for a flying axe handle, but Phoenix counters it with a fist to the midsection... Phoenix and Yokosuda trade punches in the middle of the ring... Out of nowhere Yokosuda nails Phoenix with a jawbreaker and follow sit up with a backbreaker... Yokosuda pulls Phoenix to his feet and goes for a backdrop suplex, but Phoenix blocks it... Phoenix goes for a flapjack, but Takeda Yokosuda counters it with a short arm scissors... Phoenix gets a hold of the ropes after being trapped for 5 seconds...]
Jeremy Tucker : Still no-one being able to gain the upper hand...
Andrew Fulton : Give it time... someone will come out on top eventually...
[As Phoenix clambers to his feet Yokosuda executes a flying axe handle and then goes for a half nelson suplex, but Phoenix counters it with a backward kick and clamps Yokosuda in a side headlock... Yokosuda manages to grab the ropes after being locked up for 7 seconds but then gets shoved through the ropes to the arena floor... Before the referee can count for very long, Yokosuda re enters the ring... Phoenix grabs Yokosuda and nails him with a sit out powerbomb...]
Jeremy Tucker : I'd say that Phoenix is getting somewhat of the upper hand right now...
Andrew Fulton : As much as it pains me to do so, I have to agree with you...
[Phoenix runs into the ropes but gets caught with an elbow from Yokosuda before he locks him in the STF... The referee is asking Phoeix if he want him to stop the fight but Phoenix angrily shakes his head... Phoenix eventually fights his way out of the hold... He then attempts to place Yokosuda on the turnbuckle, but he blocks it and goes for a front slam, but Yokosuda counters it with a roundhouse right and a spinning back fist... Yokosuda and Phoenix trade punches in the middle of the ring yet again... Yokosuda hits an arm bar takedown on Phoenix and then drags him to his feet and whips him into the ropes... Phoenix comes back, but is met with a kick to the midsection which is followed up by a double under hook suplex... Yokosuda whips Phoenix into the ropes but Phoenix turns things round and takes Yokosuda down with a Yakuza kick...]
Jeremy Tucker : Yokosuda trying to regain the upper hand...
Andrew Fulton : And failing miserably... Phoenix is more than a match for him...
[As Yokosuda gets to his feet Phoenix hits him with a clothesline which sends him through the ropes to ringside... The referee reaches a count of eight before Yokosuda re enters the ring... Phoenix hits Yokosuda with a gut buster and follows it up with a tilt-a-whirl side slam... Phoenix goes for a brain buster, but Yokosuda blocks it and takes Phoenix down with a kick to the thigh... He follows this with a flying dropkick and a Samoan Drop... However, when he attempts to place Phoenix on the turnbuckle, Phoenix blocks it... Instead Yokosuda whips Phoenix into the ropes but gets caught with a shoulder block... Momentarily stunned Yokosuda then falls victim to a scoop slam from Phoenix... Yokosuda climbs to his feet again and gets taken back down by a leg capture suplex from Phoenix... Phoenix runs into the ropes and Yokosuda gets floored by a discus lariat... Phoenix locks Yokosuda in a side headlock and Yokosuda valiantly tries to break the hold...]
Jeremy Tucker : This match really could go either way... I can't pick a winner...
Andrew Fulton : Are we watcing the same match? Phoenix is wrestling circles around his opponent...
[Phoenix whips Yokosuda into the turnbuckle, but Yokosuda reverses it and goes for a flying axe handle, but Phoenix catches him with a fist to the midsection... Phoenix runs into the ropes but gets caught with a flying clothesline... Yokosuda whips Phoenix into the turnbuckle and follows him in with a Running Forearm Smash... Yokosuda then catches Phoenix with a backbreaker... Yokosuda executes the Kwon's Flail on Phoenix...]
Jeremy Tucker : Phoenix is down... Takeda Yokosuda goes for the pin...
Andrew Fulton : The referee counts: One, two, thr-kickout...
[As Phoenix climbs to his feet, Yokosuda goes for a side headlock, but Phoenix throws him off and catches him with a knee to the midsection before drilling him with another Discus lariat...
[Phoenix whips Yokosuda into the turnbuckle, but it gets reversed... Phoenix comes back and rocks Yokosuda with a kick to the midsection which he follows up with a brainbuster... Phoenix executes the Phoenix Driver on Yokosuda.]
Jeremy Tucker : The crowd is going crazy... Phoenix goes for the pin...
Andrew Fulton : The referee counts: One, two, thr - kickout...
Jeremy Tucker : Phoenix takes Yokosuda down with a flying headbutt and follows it up with a second Phoenix Driver!
Andrew Fulton : Phoenix has the crowd going wild as he goes for the pin...
One!!!
Two!!!
Three!!!
[The crowd erupts as Phoenix scrambles to his feet and the referee raises his arm...]
Frank Salazar : The winner of the match... PHOENIX!!!!
[Phoenix grins to himself as he slides out of the ring under the bottom rope and makes his way back up the entrance ramp as Yokosuda slowly climbs to his feet looking mightily pissed off.]
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SWAT Team
.::XHF Superstar::.
The Promise Land
Posts: 2,416
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Post by SWAT Team on Mar 23, 2019 20:42:57 GMT -5
We switch to the entrance of the T-Mobil arena with Tye Gibson. Suit is dressed for his street fight with denim jeans on and a KGB muscle top. Bruno is standing in his customary position to the right and behind Suit.
Tye Gibson : Soutter, thanks for joining us before your big fight.
Bruno : (leaning in) Thats Sovereign.
Soutter : Thats right Ty_ger. Get it right.
Tye Gibson : Sorry, Sovereign. Thanks for joining us before your big fight.
Soutter : Anything for the SWAT fans Ty_ger.
Tye Gibson : Did you just see the Pythons Pit? Any thoughts on Triple V ripping off your host segment?
Soutter : I ripped it off from the original Pit, so who would i be to complain.
Tye Gibson : There were some strong accusations and alluding to you and the KGB being responsible for the kidnapping of Vampira, care to comment on that?
Soutter : We have made it clear that we had nothing to do with that, as for our lack of focus on helping him in his search for her, for all we know, she is off shacked up with the latest guy to give her a like on social media. She is a woman after all, they are renowned for opening their legs to any hump who gives them attention, and likes.
Tye Gibson : Not all wome ...
Soutter : Dont you dare contradict ME! Hold the mic, and shut your trap!
We are moments away from one of the biggest matches of my career, and in SWATs history, and you question me about some vamp floozy runaway?
Suit stares at the camera with intensity.
Soutter : Vile vince Viper! Your days are up, your hours are UP! Your minutes are UP! Now is time to face the music. To step UP and go toe to toe with The Big Bad Bustling Bandit! The Centre of Attention! The Sovereign of SWAT! The Master of the Powerslam! Mad Dog Paulie Fucken Soutter!!!
Now is time to show Vegas what true carnage is, 100 years of reckless parties and abandon, of wilful lust, deceit and degeneratism, all will be surpassed in a half hour of pure unadulterated mayhem!
You think you can con the SWAT workers to help you? That you are the good guy? You are the DEVIL! You are trying to send us out of business! Make them jobless! And thinks they dumb enough to aid you?
We dont need anyone, we are the Bandits! We know them backyarders are out there in the cesspool known as Vegas waiting, bring_them_on!
I got the skill to thrill!
The name to entertain!
Im loud and proud, and well endowed!
Im about to go to war with the slimiest snake in the game, and i like it like that!
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SWAT Team
.::XHF Superstar::.
The Promise Land
Posts: 2,416
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Post by SWAT Team on Mar 23, 2019 20:43:41 GMT -5
[You know if he was trying to suck up to the boys, maybe he shouldn't have kicked them out of the dressing room. Its really cold out in the hall, and they are pretty sure the night will end in at least one sexual harassment lawsuit from an intern walking down the wrong way as they try to get changed.] [Inside the SWAT dressing rooms...] [There are A LOT of dead reindeer.] Sirius Man dressed as one of the three wise men to avoid security checks: Vile did you put drain cleaner in the egg nog? [The camera pans up from the rotting carcas of Dasher, to the pearly yellows of everyone's favourite geriatric bad boy, TripleV...] Vile "Vince" Viper: I likes my ribsss. #ZING# [Huge flashing neon lights, not unlike the welcome to fabulous las vegas sign that Old Scratch has a fierce rivalry with, enter the frame with a simple message...] THE VILE VINCE VIPER CHRISTMAS SPECIAL [Jonathan Smith dressed as the ghost of christmas past drags one of the dead deer over to Viper by the leg.] Jonathan Smith: Mister Viper, I've been trying to staple that clown nose on rudolph here for about an hour, I don't think its going to stick. Do you mind if I clock off now? I hate to ask, but I have to drive over to Scranton, Kansas City, Boise, Birmingham, Flint, Fall River, St. Louis, Memphis, Albany, Wilmington, Stockton, Rockford, Baltimore, Springfield, Miami Beach, Springfield, Pueblo, Fort Smith, Knoxville, Tucson, Salt Lake City, Reading, Waterbury, Atlanta, Medford, Albuquerque, Windsor, Toronto, Gastonia, Shreveport, South Bend, Camden, and Columbus over the next two days, and I'm not going to make it if I don't head out soon. Vile "Vince" Viper <taken aback>: ...are you sssanta? Jonathan Smith <a common mistake>: No, I'm visiting family. #ZING# Vile "Vince" Viper <eyes narrow>: Try the nossse a few more timesss. [Pushing through the door LEFT Tentacle is carrying a mountain of presents for all the girls and boys, who are named Vile Viper. Tentacle is decked out as an elf to get past Phoenix's "NO BACKYARD" policy.] LEFT Tentacle ELF: Why are we having a christmas special again? Nativity Manger Dog (probably Sirius Man): ...Because Vile is jealous of all of Soutter's celebrity guests, feels name dropping is the only thing the bandit has going for him, and figured this would be a great time to trick all his renown friends into making an appearance. [The room grows quiet as the Nativity Manger Dog realizes he said that out loud, and waits for a +4 newspaper to the back of the head.] Vile "Vince" Viper <bright red which is FUCKING HARD for an albino>: ...just because its true doesn't mean you should say it. [The Nativity Manger Dog who is probably the SWAT Ultimate Champion breathes a sigh of relief. Why wasn't he just brained with a newspaper? Was it a christmas miracle? From the dirty look that Viper is giving him, its probably just a reprieve in front of his celebrity guests.] #KNOCK# #KNOCK# #KNOCK# Vile "Vince" Viper: Oh my god its Ssscott Baio!!! [Yes, Joanie Loves Chachi's own SCOTT BAIO is the wrong side of fifty and standing at the door! What a star studded christmas special! Eat yourself out Joanie!] Vile "Vince" Viper <pearly yellows>: Wow, Ssscott Baio - its so nice of you to show up at my fantastic holiday special and wish me luck with my match against Sssoutter before singing the dreidel song for all my chosen fans! Scott Baio: Do you have my agent's fee? [Well that killed the mood. When VVV first started booking talent he thought he'd have Adrian Tanner's fortune to blow. Hopefully Baio takes Viperbucks.] Scott Baio: I told you the last time, I don't accept Viperbucks. Vile "Vince" Viper <trying to whisper off camera>: I'm a little ssshort. Scott Baio <looking up at the king of snakes>: What the hell is that suppose to mean? Vile "Vince" Viper: Fine. Fine. <handing Scott Baio thirty non-Viperbucks> That's what Harvey negotiated. Scott Baio: God damned Harvey. [Scott Baio stomps off, but before Vile can close the door - here comes Richard Greico!!!] Richard Greico: HAPPY HOLIDAYS VILE! I HOPE YOU KICK SOUTTER'S TEETH DOWN HIS FUCKING THROAT. Who wants to hear me sing the dreidel song in honour of Pancha Ganapati? Vile "Vince" Viper <shaking head>: Thanks for coming Richard, but Ssscott Baio took off with your appearance fee. Richard Grieco: Son of a bitch! [Richard Grieco chases after Scott Baio for the thirty bucks, one of their families will have a happy pancha ganapati.] Vanilla Ice: Yo V-man, this mean the coke is on Ice? Vile "Vince" Viper: I'm sssorry Vanilla, without Richard Grieco it would take a christmas miracle to get enough cocaine here for both of us. Vanilla Ice: That is cold. [Trying to change the somber mood of the shitty christmas party, Hanson starts to cover "Santa Claus has AIDS."] Isaac Hanson: The nurses all are sad... Mbop... Tyler Hanson: 'cause Santa's GOT IT BAD! Mbop... Zac Hanson: Santa Claus has Mbop the Aids this year! Vile "Vince" Viper: You know what boys... even if Sssoutter gets the academy award winning celebrities, and I just get Michael Vick... [Nativity Manger Dog is running around in the background being chased by the retired quarterback, with Michael Vick trying to become his new manager.] Vile "Vince" Viper: ...This evening is not going to be a bust! I mean, we actually made it on a joint card that features the AMAZONSSS! Trust me boys, when I say, they can't all be winners! This evening EVEN YOU backyard stars can count on getting lucky with a female wrestler who has poor self-esteem. Just hope its not Tornado Red. With my amazing advice on courtship you'll all get your chance at running the train on Suzi Spitz! Hardcore Hero disguised as Frosty: Um Mister Viper... we're all in committed relationships. JUNIOR the mutant baby from It's Alive dressed as JC: WHAAAA! Vile "Vince" Viper: Really? Working for SSSWAT B you all managed to attract women? Foster's Beer Man Santa: Real women don't interest me, mate. Aztec Dracula Mrs. Claus: No Yo Bebo Vino. Lindsay Lohan: I think what the guys are trying to say is... they appreciate you thinking of them, but it doesn't take a mean girl to find love. Vile "Vince" Viper: Even you Jonathan? Jonathan Smith <shooting six nails into the nose of a dead reindeer>: ESPECIALLY ME Vile! I have like thirty wives! Vile "Vince" Viper: You don't want any more? Jonathan Smith <wiping the sweat off his brow>: Not from the Amazon, no! Vile "Vince" Viper: Well... I realize that some of you may be too embarrassed in front of Tonya Harding, Amy Fisssher, Lisssa Nowak, and Lorena Bobbitt to admit you're losers at love. Lisa Nowak: I think what Vile is trying to say is... he appreciates your being bashful, but it doesn't take a space cadet to find love. [Tonya Harding bashes Lisa Nowak in the leg with a dead reindeer. Amy Fisher and Lorena Bobbitt look less comfortable in this holiday special.] Vile "Vince" Viper: Sssoutter wants to bust out Gracie Law? Well EVERYTHING I learned about love, I learned from Lo Pan. Lo Pan: You tell 'em Vile! Everyone: ... Vile "Vince" Viper: If you want to win a woman's heart just do what I do. There are two girls with green eyes, and I will marry them both! I will sacrifice Gracie Law to appease my Emperor, and live out my earthly pleasures with Miao Yin! [........!] [BEST CATCH PHRASE EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!] Amy Fisher: Vile... thank you for inviting all of us for your Christmas special, but it sounds like you're too hung up on this Soutter loser to appreciate the holidays. Vile "Vince" Viper <cringe>: ...that's so true, Amy Fisssher. Amy Fisher: I could be completely out to lunch, but it sounds like you're a little jealous of the Australian asshole. I used to be a very jealous person. <looking around at Tonya Harding and Kim Jong Un> I think all of your family and friends who came out here tonight, we can all say the same thing. Its easy to say, but hard to get through. I think we all look back at our younger selves and laugh at the objects of our envy. I was jealous of that? How psycho was I? [OJ Simpson nods in agreement.] Amy Fisher: But you're Vile "Vince" Viper... one of the most accomplished, and diabolical characters to ever get a RSPWF/EWRT wrestler of the year award. Who is this Soudder? The Sovereign of... what was it snot? We have NO IDEA who that guy is... so you really shouldn't get so beaten up over this. [TripleV's heart grew ten sizes that night.] OJ Simpson: What's really bothering you, sport? Vile "Vince" Viper: ...well Juice... [The lights dim.]
[Oh no. He's about to cut that promo that makes him the face in the scenario and everyone in the company a nazi for not running to his aid later.]
Vile "Vince" Viper: ...I joke a lot about putting Atlantic Coast out of business. I guess its convenient for storylines for the boys to act like that's the reason they aren't coming out to defend me against Soutter's cronies. Doesn't make much sense, does it? I'm the biggest name to grace SWAT outside of my late friend, Adrian Tanner... I'm probably only in this fed because I miss him. My being here... my name value... it draws ratings... it gets sponsors... it sells out house shows... so yeah, I run my mouth about running them out of business, but SSSWAT is still here right now because of me. Do I deserve to get beaten mercilessly for cutting promos that build up business? According to Hell's Bouncer, Attila Balan, and Timeless... apparently I do. Nice guysss.
Why do I hate the KGB so much? Kross Global Bandits. Misspelling cross to get the initials a certain way.
Oh it plays up Soutter's bandit moniker, but the goal is remind people of the Komitet Gosudarstvennoy Bezopasnosti. The Committee for State Security. The Soviet Union's security agency from the fifties into the early nineties...
Now I know its funny to hate on the Sssoviet Union like they were jokes. America won, lets mock the cold war like we were silly for ever fearing these people.
I'm an old man.
I'm an old ROMANIAN man.
The time period that people laugh about. The USSR... the KGB that Sssoutter thinks is so cute to play up? I remember them well.
I lived in daily fear of them.
Friends would go off for questioning, never to return. My printing press smashed beyond repair. You think I went to school to become a wrestler? When you can't get work permits for anything else, fear and hunger turn to desperation. I tried to direct the passion I had for journalism, for truth, into my work. Even if it was getting roughed up by gypsies and bears at small carnivals, I could make a statement. The fear returns.
I was victimized for a long time by the organization that Sssoutter chooses to use as his name sake.
Are the Kross Global Bandits the premier heel organization in SSSWAT? No. They are a handful of thugs who double team people, play tricks on gullible youths like Hell's Bouncer, and generally make sexist jokes while hiding behind Joe Pesci. Does that sound elite?
They are the HEELS for tonight, however.
...Because tonight, someone is calling them out on their bullshit.
The KGB? Why not call yourselves the Nazis? Because its not as provocative as it is insssensssitive and stupid?
Its NOT provocative. It is Insssensssitive and INCREDIBLE SSSTUPID.
So tonight. I take Sssoutter and company to task for being trolls, oblivious to history, and doomed to become part of it.
...And every member of the Atlantic Coast locker room that chooses to defend them, because of the inane argument that I AM HURTING BUSINESSSSSSS. You are defending men who mock war criminals.
You are the monsters.
OJ Simpson: That Soutter sounds like a real dick.
Vile "Vince" Viper: You have no idea Juice.
[The spot light dims further.]
[Darkness.]
[Merry Christmas Vile.]
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SWAT Team
.::XHF Superstar::.
The Promise Land
Posts: 2,416
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Post by SWAT Team on Mar 23, 2019 20:45:00 GMT -5
Jeremy Tucker : And it is time folks, time for Triple V Vs Suit! Man o Man, this has THE big fight feel Fulton!
Andrew Fulton : Two titans of the game, and Vegas is their playground, god help us.
Jeremy Tucker : Suit is still out the front of the arena from his interview, pacing around, and here comes Viper, look at him swaggering out from the arena, he heads straight towards Suit, Suit sees him, and they both running charge each other, its ON!
Andrew Fulton : Behind Viper is a swarm of backyarders also charging, its like the scene from the Wanderers.
Jeremy Tucker : It is, The KGB running with Suit, but man, they are out numbered!
Andrew Fulton : Viper and Soutter collide like the intro of a video game. This is no Assassins Creed! This is SWAT!
Jeremy Tucker : Triple V and Soutter wail away with wild lefts and rights at each other, they are then swarmed by the 20 plus backyarders and 5 members of the KGB!
Andrew Fulton : There are eight of them on Soutter Jerry, EIGHT!
Jeremy Tucker : Soutter clobbers Farmer Vincent then TREE from Evil Dead. Tree from Poltergeist eats a Soutter head butt, Franken Berry gets clotheslined down, Bad Boy and Spud Boy get their heads rammed together with a double noggin knocker. FireRed Ninja is caught in the air mid flying spin kick and thrown into Flogging Dead Horses .... LOW BLOW!
Andrew Fulton : Vile with the low blow to Soutter, and the Suit goes DOWN!
All eight backyarders AND Viper lay the boots to Suit.
Jeremy Tucker : They are stomping him big time, here come the KGB, CSK flings himself at them all, flying with a cross body off the top of a limo parked outside the arena, and he sends them toppling like ten pins.
Andrew Fulton : Fierce and Viper now duking it out.
Jeremy Tucker : Bruno choke slams Mad MAX Nolan then one for Cat Scratch Fever, but he is over whelmed by Feral Boy, Hardcore Hero, Horse Boxer Black Stallion, Human Guinea Pig and LizardMan IV.
Andrew Fulton : Soutter makes the save spearing three of them. And Pesci low blows the other two.
Jeremy Tucker : Bruno then double choke slams Feral Boy and Hardcore Hero onto the bonnet of the limo.
Andrew Fulton : Viper eye gouges Fierce and Tiger Drivers him on to the asphalt.
Jeremy Tucker : Bishop is getting gang stomped by Teen Old Man Jenkins, Zombie Adrian Tanner Jr., Herbicide, LEGEND, Goliath, "Registered Sex Offender" Frank Wilkes, non-descript wrestler who gets really angry when he lands on his keys , Samoan Hit Parade (DJ Tooki and The Beef), Short Circuit Protagonist and Singing Pentagram.
Switch to the locker room and we see Pesci has made his way down there, he flings the door open as they are all looking on on the monitors
Pesci : Enough is enough! These backyarders are trying to send you out of work! And look at the zombie mocking your fallen hall of famer! $100 bonus, for every backyarder each of you chair shot, happy end of year bonus! Fight for your company, fight for your fallen champions!
Kilroy and Brickheart jump to their feet, grabbing a handy chair each, and are followed by Marcus White, Logan Burgess, Damian Payne, Tatsuo Takeshi and Dean Green all grab a chair, the Fairtex brothers are there and they both grab a chair and Hells Bouncer looks undecided and grabs a chair heading out also.
Andrew Fulton : Wow! Pesci rallying the troops!
Jeremy Tucker : Its all or nothing Fulton.
As the SWAT crew make their way thru the hallways, they are set upon by more backyarders. Kid Koala, Samuel Wilson, Art Jackson, DEATH ADDER, Joesph "Kangeroo Killer" Shaw, "Wannabe Aboriginal" James Flinders, Blue Ringed Octopus, BASTARD Razorback, Jack Straights & Mouse Spider Mask all swarm them, and look at the SWAT guys go, they tear into them with the chairs, demolishing them, wiping thru them like they are walkers or something. The backyarders are all wearing T-shirts with Marcus White as the SWAT Aussie champion
Andrew Fulton : Triple V is pure genius, and look at Marcus looking down on them shirts, think we can get him one for keeps sake Jerry?
Jeremy Tucker : The SWAT crew enter the entrance park, and its chaos. Kilroy lines up Flogging Dead Horses and wallops him with a chair shot, and another and another, FDH runs for it and Kilroy ensues, following him into the foyer.
Andrew Fulton : Indians founded this area Jerry.
Sitting at a one armed bandit (...) Foster's Beer Man is minding his own business looking at his laptop. As Kilroy Evans tosses Flogging Dead Horses into the machine, Foster's looks up and smiles at Evans, pointing at his laptop and innocently wondering "Isn't that your mom?" Enough is enough. Kilroy Evans starts unloading on Beer Man, who defends himself in between replacing all the drinks at the bar with Fosters.
Andrew Fulton : Meanwhile at the top of the Stratosphere, Bruno and El Hijo de Aztec Dracula trade chops; each one teasing to fall off the top of the sky high attraction.
Jeremy Tucker : Hells Bouncer has the chair, but he doesnt know which way to go, he hates the KGB, but there is dollars on the line, he shrugs and clobbers CSK in the back of the head with a chair! He then gives a chair shot to Logan Burgess! Traitor!
Andrew Fulton : He fights for himself Jerry, these guys have made his life hell ever since coming to SWAT!
Bishop charges at LEFT Tentacle with a running forearm, but the plucky face of Backyard wrestling trips on his own suit. Instead Bishop ends up catching Hell's Bouncer from behind. Déjà vu. Turning to his nemesis, Bouncer immediately grabs Bishop by the throat. LEFT Tentacle attempts to explain that it was a mistake, and he didn't mean to cause problems, but the two men just don't listen and HB double arm running chokeslam bombs Bishop onto the top of the limo.
Jeremy Tucker : Bishop in trouble. The limo door is opening, they must think there is an earthquake or a natural disaster or something. Its Frank Marino and the boys telling Joe to jump in. What a relief. Telling his brother Dominic to join him (where did he come from), Joe Pesci climbs into Marino's vehicle and all we see is shadows of a dozen fists and arms waylaying the Pescis. We all know how this one turns out. Sure, what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas, but just assume that Joe Pesci is beaten to death and buried alive with his sibling; and that any Joe Pesci we see from this moment on is an imposter being used by Paul to maintain control of SWAT!
Andrew Fulton : Wow!
Jeremy Tucker : The Limo takes off and clears a path, Soutter is running down the path, not after Pesci, he is swinging around the giant neon cowboy hat and Triple V is on the run, running from the giant neon cowboy hat sign that Soutter is swinging as a weapon, VVV screams "Kilroy - I am your father! This gets Kilroy Evans to charge at him with a spear, only for Vile to side step it, letting Soutter take the hit. The neon cowboy hat sign explodes!
Andrew Fulton : Vile donkey punches Evans in the back of the head like he does to his mom, then throws the unconscious young man off, covering Soutter.
Jeremy Tucker : One ...................... Two ............... kick out by Suit.
Andrew Fulton : Soutter is then ascended on by Sirius Man, LEFT Tentacle, Foster's Beer Man and "Bigamist" Jonathan Smith. They go to town on the Sovereign and are stomping him to kingdom cum.
Jeremy Tucker : Phoenix comes out with a team of security and is trying to clear up the chaos, he is screaming he said there would be no backyarders on our shows, and he meant it and there is security every, they are ushering everyone back into the arena.
Andrew Fulton : Fierce and Triple V have wondered off and are near the gondalas.
"You really light up a room, Jimmy!" VVV breaths YOGA FIRE at James Fierce... only THIS TIME James Fierce ducks under it, letting the backyard version of the Stay Puft Mashmellow Man take the burn. The Ghostbusters tribute is engulfed in flames! James feels proud not falling for the same trick twice, only to have the mountain of flaming mashmellow fall on top of him! Fierce rolls around in flaming marshmellow horror, more third degree burns than last time!
Just up the street at the Venetian, VVV tries to set James Fierce on fire with another YOGA FLAME, only to have the hillbilly assassin sidestep it, letting Penn & Teller take the hit. The two men run around on fire, one screaming more than the other. Fierce jumps from gondola to gondola across the watery pool of the Venetian avoiding multiple attempted murders and letting members of the Blue Man Group burn in his stead. Until he finally gets cocky - YOGA FIRE!!!! Engulfed in flames, James Fierce is lucky to fall back into the pond, avoiding another lengthy leave of absence. Pleased with himself, and feeling like this winning streak should hit the tables, Fierce emerges from the water with his hands in the air like he's invincible, so Vile hits him with another YOGA FIRE! ...That'll do it.
Jeremy Tucker : WHAM! Soutter clocks Viper with a chair to the back of the head.
A screen pops up in the corner showing the entrance way now almost clear, Phoenix and the security masses having cleared it all. Joe Pesci is seen in the bottom corner crawling out of a gutter barely breathing.
Andrew Fulton : Soutter wheel barrow slams VVV, face first onto the stone work of the Venetian.
Jeremy Tucker : Soutter grabs Viper and drags him up the street, choking him back first into a door way of a building ... its the PINBALL HALL OF FAME!
There are literally hundreds of the machines in there, Soutter stops dead, staring at the games, entranced, Triple V looks up and sees them all, and he too is mesmerised by the games. Soutter then stomps him hard out of his crouch, picks him up on his shoulder and running powerslams him right through one of the machines, and it is buzzing and lights and glass everywhere.
Andrew Fulton : TILT!
Jeremy Tucker : Soutter then lifts the broken machine up over his head, and tosses it down on VVV.
Andrew Fulton : What a waste, stop it! Dont ruin the beautiful machines!
Jeremy Tucker : He hears you i think Fulton. Cause look, Soutter with a handful of srcuff of the neck and back of the pants hoists Triple v out of the window and back into the strip.
Andrew Fulton : They head towards the Bellagio fountains and Soutter has Viper in the pool, and is drowning him Jerry!
Jeremy Tucker : Stop the match already!
Andrew Fulton : Triple V is gasping for air, he cant breathe!
Jeremy Tucker : Thumb to the throat! Viper with a desperate thumb to the throat of Soutter, and now both men cant breathe.
Andrew Fulton : They both crawl out of the water and battle towards another building, its the Madame Tussauds was museum!
Jeremy Tucker : Viper runs Suit into the wax dummies and they fall ontop of him crushing him.
Andrew Fulton : Soutter pushes them off of him and they all fly. He grabs the wax replica of Arnold Schwarzenegger and rips off his arm.
Soutter : Ill be back!
Jeremy Tucker : Soutter clobbers Triple V with the arm. They walk past the wax Pamela Anderson and he reaches out and grabs her boob
Soutter : (Eddie Murphy imitation) Hows it going baby?
Soutter and VVV then fight their way out of the museum and into the casino. Soutter throws VVV into a craps table, then follows it up with a Soutterlanche! But Vile pulls Joe Pesci into the way!!! Soutter crushes Pesci dead.
Vile seems more interested in shoving chips in his snakeskin pockets than defending himself, so Paul lays in some vicious rights before throwing VVV into the blackjack table! Soutter follows it up with a Soutterlanche!!!!! ...Only Vile pulls Joe Pesci in the way. Soutter catches Pesci hard enough to make him forget Lethal Weapon III like we all wish we could.
VVV is looking at his opponents cards. Realizing hes trying to cheat at blackjack rather than take a beating like a man, Soutter slaps the old man around before throwing him into the roulette wheel --- following up with a SOUTTERLANCHE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! While physically impossible, Vile somehow manages to pull Pesci into the way! ...this continues for craps, baccarat, three card poker, pai gow, big six, texas hold em... VVV is making an absolute fortune, while Joe Pesci is being concussed out of a couple of decades worth of imdb credits.
Andrew Fulton : This place has been trashed!
Jeremy Tucker : We have a great insurance deal Fulton, Slater is one hell of a lawyer and somehow got us a deal that is beyond belief.
Andrew Fulton : What do you know, they are heading to the ring.
Jeremy Tucker : The two men come thru the entrance way, and duke it out down to the ring. Triple V drop toe holds Suit and sends him forehead first into the ring apron.
Andrew Fulton : Standing mooonsault! Tiple V nailed it!
Jeremy Tucker : No one can deny, he is on heck of a wrestler! Triple V with the cover ........ one .................. two .................... kick out by Suit.
Andrew Fulton : Suit with a hard shot to the guts, then rams the hunched over Triple V into the ring steps.
Jeremy Tucker : Soutter then gorilla presses VVV and throws him thru the ropes into the ring.
Andrew Fulton : Soutter whips Triple V into the corner, SOUTTERLANCHE!
Jeremy Tucker : VVV pulls Pesci into ... only joking, no he doesnt! Soutter nailed IT! Finally!
Andrew Fulton : Suit with the cover!
Jeremy Tucker : One ................... two ................ VVV gets the shoulder up!
Andrew Fulton : Soutter goes out of the ring, and looks under it, grabbing a bag, the bag is bulging. Thumb tacks?
Jeremy Tucker : Soutter holds the tacks in the air and the crowd pops, he opens the back and pours them out, NO! Not tacks ... KEYS!!!!!
Andrew Fulton : A bag full of KEYS! All over the ring!
Jeremy Tucker : NOOOOOO! Soutter lifts Triple V up on his shoulder ..... RUNNING POWERSLAM!!!! INTO THE KEYS!!!!!
Andrew Fulton : MASTER OF THE POWERSLAM!!!
Jeremy Tucker : Ohhhh the pain! Cover by Suit ............... ONE ......................... TWO ............................. THRE Triple V gets the shoulder up!
Andrew Fulton : Wow!
Jeremy Tucker : Soutter signals for the Soutter Special!
The crowd lose their shit as Soutter calls for the Soutter Special!
Slowly coming too, Vile "Vince" Viper starts to beg off.
The Big Bad Bustling Bandit moves in for the kill...
! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !
A poisonous snake shoots out of Viper's arm and catches Soutter on the throat!
Andrew Fulton : VIPER WITH A SNAKE UP HIS SLEEVE!!!
Jeremy Tucker : Eastern Brown Snake! Eastern Brown Snake! Those are incredibly poisonous!!!
Andrew Fulton : Soutter had this WON, but, starting to stagger... it looks like the poison is taking affect...
! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !
*MONSTER POP*
Andrew Fulton : SOUTTER JUST RIPPED THE SNAKE OFF LIKE IT WAS NOTHING!!!
Jeremy Tucker : Why would Viper use an Australian snake on Soutter?! As a tough as nails local, the man is immune to everything we find mildly distasteful about Australia!!!
Andrew Fulton : Soutter is laughing it off, but you know Vile is GOING TO DIE right now for his arrogance!
Jeremy Tucker : Viper REALLY begging right now, and looks like hes ready to cry... the big man coming in for the Soutter Spec----
! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !
Andrew Fulton : VIPER WITH ANOTHER SNAKE UP HIS SLEEVE!!!
Jeremy Tucker : That's a barba amarilla! Not native to Australia, so no immunities there, and it just bit Soutter... well...
The crowd seem horrified as the snake shoots out of Viper's sleeve, catching Soutter square in the crotch. Not wanting to show fear or pain, The Czar of SWAT reaches down attempting to yank the deadly latin American snake off his genitals. IT takes a few bloody pulls, but eventually the head of the KGB frees himself. Then drops down unconsous!
Andrew Fulton : OH MY GOD! WE'RE GOING TO NEED SOME PARAMEDICS OUT HERE!
Jeremy Tucker : Soutter being HEAVILY POISONED by that snake, and Viper with a fistful of tights!
Andrew Fulton : Not like this!!!
Jeremy Tucker : ONE ................................. TWO ........................ THREE!!!!!!
Ramones cover of "It's a wonderful world" hits and Triple V holds up his arm in exhausted victory.
A grim looking Phoenix comes out on stage with the safe. An accountant from the firm of Morowitz, Benson, and Kruger comes out with the combination. A third party consultant accepts the combination and starts to open the safe...
Andrew Fulton : And here we go... the cereal and the title... peace of mind... its safe to say this will be a major relief to get his hands on...
The safe is empty.
Jeremy Tucker : I don't get it. Where is the strap? Or that stupid cereal?
Andrew Fulton : Phoenix does not look happy, NO ONE could have gotten into that safe. They have lost a lot of blood, and seem partially poisoned, but both Viper and Soutter look surprised.
Jeremy Tucker : Surprised? They look ready to kill someone.
Andrew Fulton : Screaming obscenities at one another, I'd say the war was over, but this has left more questions than answers. Could Marcus White already have the SWAT Australia Heavyweight title? Is someone eating that Mr. T cereal?
Jeremy Tucker : I don't know which one is scarier. That's a lie, its Marcus, but death to whoever eats Mr. T as well...
Jeremy Tucker : Literally.
Andrew Fulton : Viper wins a crazy street fight, wow, and still two matches to come.
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