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Post by IMMORTALS on Sept 8, 2019 23:16:26 GMT -5
How does this work, do people submit roleplays along with segments and matches? Or are you including stuff from before the show too?
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Post by moonchild on Sept 13, 2019 11:15:57 GMT -5
Hey Hyperion,
Sorry not get back to you sooner. I been working crazy overtime to deal with a large scale printer recall at the hospital I work for. We had multiple fires from bad power supplies and they forced us to work mandatory OT to swap them all out. Trying to get back to work on getting results done for FNC - 12. To answer your question I allow people to write segments for shows if they want, but I don't get very many takers on that. So most of the segments you read in the results were written by me. I base them off of what people are writing in their characters role plays and the story-line direction I am taking the overall universe Ultimate Wrestling exists in.
We could really use someone of your talent in our E-Fed if you're interested. We have a discord channel you can pop onto and talk with some of the other role players to get a feeling for the vibe. We have a show every 3 weeks or so and there is a 2 RP limit per show. Role plays can be as long as you want, but I tend to value quality of quantity if you couldn't tell by our role plays and shows value story most of all.
Hope this was helpful. If you have anymore questions ask away.
MoonChild.
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Post by moonchild on Oct 17, 2019 19:48:56 GMT -5
storysegment.jpg 32 hours ago.
Candy Bar – Detroit City
Hammer Industries CEO, also known the world over as cyborg wrestler Jeremiah Vastrix and Ultimate Wrestling’s ring announcer Rose Johnston stood a few feet away from the massive body of the genetically altered man-beast known only as Tarrasque. He was the product of a disgusting experiment conducted during Allen Anderson’s tenure at the now defunct War Hammer Incorporated. Allen had used the unwitting beast as a bodyguard and as assassin by asserting himself as his father figure throughout his oblivious existence. Tarrasque however was now dead thanks to Rose Johnston after Anderson had sent him to kill Jeremiah. His blood and brain matter oozed from the fresh hole in his forehead while the traumatized bartender starred at the dead fresh body on his bar floor.
Bartender: What in holy fuck? What the fuck just happened?!
Rose: I’ve… I’ve never taken a life before…
Jeremiah: He was going to kill me. You had no choice Rose. I told you to stay away… this stuff consumes my life. I’m always in danger…
Bartender: This is a fucking murder scene!
Jeremiah: It was self-defense! That thing came after me! You we’re here, you saw what happened!
Bartender: I don’t care, I’m calling the cops! I know who the fuck you two are! I watch Friday Night Clash every Friday!
Suddenly FBI agent Archie Wise and Debra Collins walked into the wrecked bar flashing their badges to the frightened bartender before making their way over to the roughed up Jeremiah and the now sobbing Rose Johnston. Jeremiah had not seen Archie or Debra since the attack on the Las Vegas Stratosphere Tower by Atlar Robotics hitman Gizer Sarp. The violence had brought down the entire tower killing hundreds and video footage of the carnage had lead the FBI to Jeremiah who had been the target of the attack.
Archie: Quite the mess…
Debra: It’s like everywhere this robotic jackass goes disaster follows.
Rose: Please I’m so sorry! He came out of nowhere and was going to kill Jeremiah! You have to believe me! I can’t go to jail! You don’t know what they’ll do to a grill like in there!
Archie: Settle down Ms. Johnston, no one is going to jail. Tarrasque has been on the CIA’s most wanted list for a very long time. You’ve done the world a favor, whoever sent this thing after Mr. Vastrix here had used him before to take out some very powerful people around the world.
Debra: Any idea who might have been behind it?
Jeremiah considered clueing the agents in on Allen Anderson, but he knew if he did that more questions would be raised about Hammer Industries link to the North Korean nuclear missile program and the company’s link to the attack would become public knowledge. Jeremiah knew that would kill any chance he had of completing his vision of using his new found power as President of Hammer to change the world for the better.
Jeremiah: Sadly no… however ever since I took control of Hammer Industries from my father and began taking the company in a different direction I’ve been threatened by multiple former high ranking employees. I’m afraid they don’t share my vision…
Debra: Alright. Well If I was you Jeremiah, I would hire some bodyguards, and stay out of large public settings from now on. You’re only putting innocent people in danger.
Jeremiah: I’ll do that… How did you two get here so fast? Have you been following me?
Archie: Stop being so paranoid and myopic. We were sent here on a direct order from the FBI Director because President McStrump has been demanding that he speak to you in person.
Jeremiah: Not this nonsense about Seattle again? McStrump Jr. is gone. I can’t bring him back if he’s vaporized. Plus, helping that dimwit is not exactly my highest priority! I’m a busy man! I’m running one of the largest corporations in the world and I’m a professional fighter as well. Why doesn’t he send you two to go look for him?
Archie: Your mother already agreed to the mission son. I’m afraid you have no choice but to come with us, otherwise we could make life very difficult for your friend Rose here…
Debra: Like “Orange is the New Black” difficult.
Jeremiah: Fine. Whatever! Will fly out to Washington State after Friday Night Clash, but I’m not going anywhere with you bureaucratic assholes!
Debra: The situation is… a little bit more complicated that you’re aware of Mr. Vastrix. The President is requesting that you visit the oval office today before taking on his mission. Will fill you in on the sensitive details on the way to Washington D.C.
Jeremiah pinched the bridge of his nose and let out a vexing sigh while shaking his head. The last thing he wanted to do was see the face of the man who’d beat him senseless with tiny bare hands while hopped up on “Blob Juice”. However it was obvious to him that no matter what he did, their paths were destined to cross once again. He walked over to the Fufu drink he’d been consuming prior to his altercation with Tarrasque and downed it before wiping the pink fruity moustache on his top lip away.
Jeremiah: Alright… Rose, I’ll see you at the show tomorrow night. Try to get some rest okay?
Rose nodded while wiping her tears away as Jeremiah walked out with the federal agents just as a cleanup crew entered the bar to take care of the crime scene. Rose and Jeremiah said their goodbyes before the cyborg got in the backseat of the black sedan Archie and Debra had arrived in. Jeremiah had been avoiding this for the entire week since his mother had brought it up to him. The President was certifiably crazy even before Dr. Summeroff and his Blob Cult had gotten their hands on him. Jeremiah knew that now more than ever that he couldn’t predict what he’d be walking into.
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24 hours ago.
Washington D.C. The Nation’s Capital
United States Vice President Mike Dense stood in the room outside of the Oval Office with an exasperated look on his face as he watched ANN’s round the clock coverage of the multiple American Crisis’s facing the country. President McStrump’s secretary, former playboy model and reality television star Veronica Mars, stood looking out the window at the thousands of livid “Red Vest” protestors who had rallied at the front gates of the Whitehouse to protest the divisive President’s many failures during his first term. ANN had covered it all from the rising cost of food prices, to the devastation and radiation sicknesses from the North Korean Nuclear strikes on west coast, to finally the homeless crises gripping major cities trying to absorb the U.S. citizens migrating eastward to escape the effects of the fallout out west.
Suddenly the phone on Veronica’s desk rang and she walked over in her red stiletto heels to answer the phone. Veronica was an ice queen, with porcelain white skin, and platinum blond hair done up in a retro Marilyn Monroe style. She looked like living anachronism, as if someone had pulled her out of the 1950’s and transported her to the present day. The secretary answered the phone and after a quick exchange she covered the receiver with her right hand and whispered over to the Vice President.
Veronica: Mr. Vice President… It’s the President of Russia on the phone. He wants to speak with the President…
VP Dense: No. I’ll talk to him. Please leave the room Veronica. This is… well it’s a delicate matter.
Veronica: No problem Mr. Vice President.
Veronica set the phone down on her desk and then walked out of the room. Dense waited until he was absolutely sure she was out of listening distance before picking up the phone to speak with the Russian President.
VP Dense: Hello Mr. President. No… no change. I’m afraid it’s getting worse. Like I said before, it all started when he went missing after the assassination attempt. Now he’s refusing to even come out of the oval office and continues to rant about this “Blob” creature.
VP Dense: I couldn’t agree more sir. It’s as if that cult from the Pacific Northwest brainwashed him with this false God nonsense. I’ve called the Catholic Church and spoken with the Pope. They’ve assured me they’re sending their best man.
Suddenly there was a loud knock at the door of the presidential secretarial room. Vice President Dense looked up with hopeful eyes at the door. He knew this was a defining momentum and swallowed hard before finishing his conversation.
VP Dense: I believe our priest is here sir. Yes, I will keep you informed sir. If Ronald McStrump can’t be saved then you are the world’s last hope.
The Vice President hung up the phone and then answered the door. There stood Kronin’s old friend from Ireland, Father Nathan O’Connell in his full black garb. Nathan had a large silver cross strapped to his back and in his right hand was a large black leather bag with a white cross stitched into it. Father Nathan was a grizzled middle-aged man with the face of priest who’d seen many horror’s in his prime. He had a rough five ‘clock shadow growing and looked as if he’d come straight from the airport. Dense made a cross motion with his hand across his face and chest before welcoming the tired Catholic priest into the room.
VP Dense: Thank God you’re here! The situations gotten even worse since you left from Europe. He saw what those “Red Vest” protestors did to his building in Detroit and he just… well he lost it!
Father Nathan: Aye, a bad dose if I’ve ever heard one boyo. On the phone you spoke of a false God he’s been praying to? What sort of false God are we speaking of?
VP Dense: Yes, He was abducted by the Cult of the Blob… they claim it to be an ancient God as insane as it sounds. Could it be that Satan has taken his mind?
Father Nathan: Quare likely I’d say… I try to stay out of politics these days, but as I understand it, the man is a bit of a dosser bastard who likes to go about things the Arseway. Perhaps the Devil had a grip on him longer than you’ve really have even known Vice President. As for this Blob, I know nothing in the ancient scrolls and scriptures of heretics worshiping a Blob creature. Even in Paganism it’s unheard of…
VP Dense: This is distressing to hear Father. As for Ronald… he’s complex man just trying to do what’s right for America in these complicated times. An Irishman like yourself should know what nationalistic pride means to a man.
Father Nathan: Right… let’s crack on with it then?
VP Dense: I’m afraid that might prove rather difficult. He’s barricaded the door and we’ve been unable to get into the oval office since early this afternoon.
Father Nathan: Janey Mac! You can’t be serious boyo?
Suddenly a familiar voice entered the room catching the attention of the two men discussing the situation.
Jeremiah: Sounds like you could use some help…
Father Nathan and the Vice President turned their attention to the door to see Jeremiah Vastrix leaned up against the door archway with expensive Ray Ban sunglasses on looking rather caviler.
Father Nathan: Who the bloody hell is this manky?
VP Dense: Jeremiah Vastrix.
Father Nathan: The wrestler? Blindin hell what is he doing here?
VP Dense: He’s a lot more than just a wrestler Father. I’m afraid you’re meeting with Mr. McStrump might be delayed Jeremiah.
Jeremiah: Yeah, Yeah… I heard all about it from those squares in the black suits you sent after me. Out of the way!
Jeremiah took off his sunglasses revealing his Warhammer cybernetic eyes as he walked toward the doors to the Oval Office. Father Nathan and the Vice President quickly moved out of the way when they noticed the cyborg’s eyes glowing brightly blue. When Jeremiah’s cybernetic eyes had harnessed enough energy, he unleashed the raw power charged up in them in a frightening duel blue laser beam. The Oval Office doors instantly blew open before exploding into smoldering pieces of debris along with all the office furniture McStrump had used to block the door. As the smoke cleared the three individuals made their way into the Presidential Office.
Jeremiah: What in the Hell?
Father Nathan: Good God the man is more Banjaxed than I could ever imagined…
VP Dense: Sweet baby Jesus…
Nothing could have prepared the trio for the insanity their eyes bore witness to. The room was nearly totally dark with the curtains drawn. The only light source in the room was coming from the multiple televisions mounted on the office walls. President McStrump was on the floor on his hands and knees completely naked praying to an exceptionally good food sculpture of the Blob he’d made from fast food hamburger paddies and bread buns. Every single television was tuned into the M.O.X news coverage of the Detroit McStrump Hotel building that had been defaced with an unflattering depiction of the President as baby crying while wearing a diaper and holding a silver spoon in his hand. Instead of covering the multiple crisis’s gripping the nation, Rupert Mudcock had deemed this story a priority over everything else.
President McStrump: Why? Why oh lord of the Earth’s seas? Why have you forsaken me? I did everything you asked and more! Why would allow these REBELS OF SOCIETY! THESE RADICAL RED VEST LEFTIST TO DEFILE ONE OF MY GREAT BUILDINGS!
VP Dense: Mr. President what in holy hell are you doing sir and why are you God damn naked?
As the President continued bowing up and down worshipping the meat symbol of his God, his orange brown ass crack came into full view repulsing the trio beyond words. McStrump quickly got up onto his feet and angrily began to shout at them.
President McStrump: What is the meaning of this! You can’t just barge into my office without my permission! I’m the God damn United States President!
Father Nathan: Stop acting the maggot boyo! Were here to help you! You’ve clearly been infected by something evil! We’ve got to get it out of you while we still can!
Jeremiah: Yeah and like you requested I’d be here remember? Something about going to Seattle to save your boy Ronald Jr.?
Suddenly without warning President McStrump’s body seized up stiffly and the white sclera of his eyes transformed completely black. The veins in his neck and forehead began to bulge and his breathing became erratic. It was clear something that had never happened before was taking place inside the Presidents body and neither of the three men witnessing it were prepared for what would transpire.
President McStrump: Ronald Jr. is dead! Along with everyone else who dared tread the holy lands Mt. Vernon!
VP Dense: Lying demon! Go back to hell from which you came!
President McStrump: Ignorant petulant Fools! Can you not see that I am trying to save this world from the worse humanity has to offer! I took control of this dimwitted vessel in order to save this planet from assured nuclear obliteration! Humanity’s leaders have been corrupted by greed and short sighted self-interest! I the Blob and Blob alone can save it from them!
Vice President Mike Dense’s eyes rolled into the back of his head and the older evangelical Christian man collapsed onto the floor fainting unconscious. His fall caught Jeremiah and Father Nathan off-guard as they turned their attention back to the possessed McStrump.
Jeremiah: You realize the entire west coast is a wasteland now thanks to you and Dr. Summeroff?
The Blob: Thanks to I? hahaha hahahaa! You’re bigger idiot than the vapid vessel I possess now Jeremiah! If it wasn’t for mine and Vendredi’s intervention you all would be dead and the world would have been plunged into a World War 3 holocaust ending all life on this floating rock you call Earth. No, the failure of your North Korean mission and the blame for the west coast disaster lie’s purely on the shoulders of my failed disciple Abishag and your marry band of incompetent so called “heroes” who couldn’t stop your repulsive fathers missile launch until after the first two rockets had been fired!
Father Nathan: Enough of this holy show demon! Your days on this earth are numbered!
The Blob: Armies of stronger men than you have tried and yet here I am once again resurrected! I cannot be defeated! Man will finally learn its rightful place in the guidance of my tentacles and I shall usher in a new golden age!
Nathan unstrapped the large silver cross from his bag and slammed it into the floor of the Oval Office in front of the possessed McStrump. As he did the floor began to split and rupture a path straight toward the President. As the force in the ground reached McStrump’s feet, his body lifted up and levitated into the air three feet off the floor. Jeremiah took a step back as the biometric scanners in his eyes began going haywire and his cybernetic components in his brain became substantially overloaded with data that couldn’t be processed even by the most sophisticated quantum computers.
Father Nathan: Our father who art in heaven! Hallowed be thy name! Thy Kingdom come! Thy will be done!
The Blob: Your Holy Father has abandoned you Irishman! As he abandoned your wife and children all those years ago!
Father Nathan: On earth as it is in heaven!
The Blob: There is no heaven! Only hell for you and your dead family!
Even with most of his cybernetic systems now completely overloaded and useless, Jeremiah could tell that Father Nathan’s prayer was getting to the Blob. The humidity in the room was going through the roof and everything in the room was starting to form condensation to the point where all of the Televisions in the room circuitry shorted out at the same time. Then the possessed Presidents mouth opened wide and he projectile vomited a putrid fish smelling bile which engulfed Father Nathan causing him to stop his prayer and back away disgusted and shaken from the experience as the Blob laughed at him.
The Blob: Stupid mortal! I have been on Earth before your species had even begun to walk on two feet! Your precious Lord Jesus Christ cannot help you defeat me!
Jeremiah: Don’t listen to him Father! It’s working! Keep going! Give him everything you got!
Nathan opened his black bag and reached inside of it pulling out an ancient Christian relic that been given to him by the Church due to the circumstances. The intricate relic was made of gold and was clearly very old and had an orb in the center filled with blood. As soon as Nathan had pulled it out the possessed Presidents facial expressions soured.
Father Nathan: Saint Januarius give me strength!
The Blob: You dare bring his blood before me?
Father Nathan:* IN THE NAME OF JESUS CHRIST! OUR TRUE GOD AND LORD! STRENGHTENED BY THE INTERCESSION OF THE IMMACULATE VIRGIN MARY! MOTHER OF GOD, OF BLESSED MICHEAL THE ARCHANGEL, OF THE BLESSED APOSTLES PETER AND PAUL AND OF ALL THE SAINTS! POWERFUL THEY ARE IN THE HOLY AUTHORITY OF OUR MINSTRY, WE CONFIDENTLY UNDERTAKE TO REPULSE THE ATTACKS AND THE DECEITS OF THE DEVIL AND OF THIS BLOB DEMON FIEND!
The possessed President screamed like crazy as blood poured out of the dark sockets of his voided eyes. It was clear that Father Nathan was winning this supernatural spiritual battle and that the Blob was finding his host body extremely uncomfortable to continue to inhabit. Jeremiah watched covering his nose in attempt to reduce the stench being absorbed by every uneven breath he took. The humidity in the room now so thick that even Jeremiah’s electronics were starting to shut down and the President’s taupe had slid straight off his bald orange head.
Father Nathan: GOD ARISES; HIS ENEMIES ARE SCATTERED AND THOSE WHO HATE HIM FLEE BEFORE HIM! AS SMOKE IS DRIVEN AWAY, SO ARE THEY DRIVEN; AS WAX MELTS BEFORE THE FIRE, SO THE WICKED PERISH AT THE PRESENSE OF GOD!
As Father Nathan finished his exorcism prayer six small squid like tentacles slithered their way out of McStrump’s throat and mouth. His body began to convulse as his lungs fought for oxygen and the darkness in his eyes began to fade away. Jeremiah and Father Nathan watched horrified as a small tiny Blob like squid creature burst out of the president’s mouth and onto the floor. Whatever Dr. Summeroff had used to infect McStrump had now grown into a little baby Blob inside of the Presidents body. The creature was frightened and flopped about on the carpeted floor like a fish out of water. President McStrump’s body collapsed to the floor as Jeremiah stood up straight and fired another blue laser beam from his eyes eviscerating the small parasitic offspring of the Blob. Father Nathan dropped to one knee thoroughly exhausted from the battle he had undertaken to save President McStrump.
Jeremiah: You okay?
Father Nathan: No…
Jeremiah: What hell did I just witness?
Father Nathan: An exorcism unlike any I’ve ever performed or encountered… Is he breathing?
Jeremiah: Yeah, he’s alive… you did it man. You saved the President of the United States…
Father Nathan: God help us all…
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“Strangle Hold” by Ted Nugent starts to play as high lights from past Friday Night Clash episodes play live on the broadcast. After a small transition the live M.O.X feed comes into focus while the camera pans around Joe Louis arena showing off all of the fans homemade signs. Unlike last time, this time the arena is full of people wearing Rebel of Society red vests in the arena. The broadcast team then cuts to Chris Rodgers and Scott Slade who are standing behind there commentator table ready to kick off the show.
Chris Rodgers: Hello and welcome to Friday Night Clash 11! I’m Chris Rodgers being joined as always by my co-host Scott Slade! Tonight we are once again in Detroit for another spectacular wrestling card!
Scott Slade: A great card for a great cause and I for one am excited for our main event as Valora and Huckleberry will be forced to work together to take on what we are being told is the top tag team in all of Russia.
Chris Rodgers: Bah! Who let those dangerous communist bastards into this country anyway? The last thing we need is them spreading that cancerous political ideology here! We get enough of that crap from Ernie Flanders! I hope team U.S.A sends them home back to Russia broken and embarrassed!
Scott Slade: Ernie Flanders is a Democratic Socialist Chris there’s a big difference.
Chris Rodgers: You say Tomato, I say Tomato, and it’s the same damn vegetable!
Scott Slade: A tomato is a fruit Chris…
Chris Rodgers: …
Scott Slade: Anyway, not only do we have that match scheduled for later tonight, but the Ultimate Wrestling tag team title belts are on the line as Evolution and Rayven team together to take on the champions Abbigail Dresden and Takuma Sato!
Chris Rodgers: After what Evolution did to Kronin last week, those two have better be careful.
Scott Slade: Yes tragic news coming out of the Reinhardt camp last week. Kronin suffered a serious spinal injury and will have to undergo surgery in hopes that he’ll be able to regain feeling in his legs.
Chris Rodgers: I for one hope to see the big German back on two feet and in the ring again soon. If it wasn’t for him, we very well may not have gotten back from North Korea alive.
Scott Slade: You’re right Chris, Kronin is a true hero in my book. Kronin we wish you well good buddy. Alright I’m getting word from our crew that our first match of the evening is about to begin.
Chris Rodgers: Jeremiah Vastrix takes on new arrival LuLu Biggs in a standard one on one match up and if I’m reading this correctly, this Biggs guy weighs over 600 pounds? Good lord... sounds like a walking heart attack.
Scott Slade: A former American sumo wrestler Chris. Should be an interesting clash of techniques.
Chris Rodgers: That Cyborg doesn’t have a technique. He just copies everyone else’s.
Scott Slade: Touché.
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Ring Announcer Rose Johnston entered the ring and the fans in attendance began to stir with excitement anticipating the first wrestling match of the night. Roses freshly waxed and moisturized long legs glistened under the stage lights as she brought her bedazzled microphone up to her plump freshly glossed lips. The former Miss America winner commanded attention like no other and the men in the crowd were completely captivated by her beauty until “Big Poppa” by Notorious B.I.G began to play on the Joe Louis arena sound system.
Rose Johnston: Making his way to the ring accompanied by his confidant Slick Mic! Hailing from New York City and weighing in at an astonishing 616 pounds! Lu! Lu! BIGGS!
Confusingly a group of scantily dressed women in high heel shoes walked out onto the stage dancing to the music before the massive LuLu Bigs and his buddy Slick Mic appeared. LuLu was dressed in a flamboyant yellow suit and was sporting massive 1980’s rapper style gold chains around his neck. Slick was dressed in a sleek Armani black suit and both gentlemen were carrying extravagant diamond detailed pimp canes in their right hands while smoking giant marijuana filled blunts in there left. Both men spent a decent amount of time getting down with the girls before heading down the ramp and slapping high fives with the fans who had given the strange group a reasonable positive reaction.
Scott Slade: What in God’s name is going on? Who the hell are all these women?
Chris Rodgers: You obviously have never seen the HBO series Hooker’s in the Bronx have you Scott?
Scott Slade: What the hell are you talking about Chris? What are you insinuating? That these women are street walkers? That’s offensive!
Chris Rodgers: Offensive my ass! Just look at them!
LuLu and his entourage made their way up the steel steps and into the wrestling ring where they continued to get down to his entrance music. Without warning however, LuLu’s music was cut off and “Down Low” by R. Kelly began to play on the speaker system. The cyborg wrestler known as Jeremiah Vastrix walked out onto the stage in his wrestling leotard and his black leather jacket. His long black hair looked still damp from the rain storm that had been hanging over Detroit since the early afternoon. His blue cybernetic eyes glowed brightly as he scanned his rotund opponent in the ring who was staring him down while he smoked his marijuana in the ring.
Chris Rodgers: Is that fat ass smoking refer in the ring?
Scott Slade: I think it’s legalized here in Detroit…
Chris Rodgers: Damn hippies, this States going down the toilet!
Rose Johnston: His opponent! He is “God’s gift to women around the world!” The robot man! Jeremiah Vastrix!
Jeremiah slid into the ring just as LuLu grabbed Rose Johnston’s microphone from her. Jeremiah barely had time to get up onto his feet before Biggs began to verbally assault him. It was clear the cyborg was not expecting this from his opponent and was caught off guard.
LuLu Biggs: Woah! Woah! Woah! Woah! You walk out here calling yourself God’s gift to women looking like some poor man’s Tony Stark and you come out to R. Kelly? R. Kelly?! Buwahahahahahaha! Man, you talk a big game, but I think the world knows you ain’t nothing but a want to be playa who still hasn’t lost his virginity!
Scott Slade: What is happening right now?
Chris Rodgers: I think this is what the young people call “Throwing Shade” or “Shots being fired” in millennial slang.
Scott Slade: Right…
At this point Jeremiah’s cold exterior and calm attitude had begun to crack as the hefty pimp continued to insult him in front of his former flame Rose Johnston who had only a day ago saved his life. Some people in the crowd had also begun to laugh as Slick Mic who had begun to become more animated and repeat all of the things Biggs said in order to be extra annoying.
LuLu Biggs: So I’m going to give you chance to finally pop that cherry of yours Robo Cop! If you forfeit this match to me, I’ll allow you take one of these fine ass ladies back to the locker room and you can finally have the experience of what it’s like to feel love of a good woman!
Fat up with Biggs, Jeremiah grabbed Rose Johnston and swung her over before open mouth kissing her on live international television. The crowd erupted as LuLu and Slic watched the cyborg make out with the former Miss America. Jeremiah then let the surprised Rose go and nailed LuLu in the face with a crazy snap kick pulled from Sato’s deadly arsenal. The kick rocked the former sumo wrestler back, but the gangster pimp stayed on his feet showing incredible balance. The hookers, Rose Johnston, and Slick Mic all bailed out of the ring and the bell keeper sounded the bell officially starting the match.
Scott Slade: This thing got underway in a hurry! What a kick by Jeremiah!
Chris Rodgers: That had to rock the skull of the big man! Look he even dropped his refer cigarette!
Scott Slade: It’s called a blunt grandpa…
Jeremiah thinking that Biggs was rattled moved into to grapple with the big sumo trained fighter, but the plan of attack failed immediately as the powerful LuLu shrugged Vastrix off like an mild annoyance onto the ring mat. The fans let out a surprising roar as Jeremiah quickly got back on his feet making sure avoid any chance of the big man using his weight against him. LuLu charged in again and this time initiated the lock up between the two of them. He quickly took advantage with his power and weight, tossing Jeremiah into the ring ropes. The cyborg bounced off the ropes and Biggs met him dead center in the ring with an epic shoulder block that took Jeremiah completely off of his feet and back onto the wrestling mat flat on his back.
Scott Slade: Oh man! Biggs is not messing around here!
Chris Rodgers: I just don’t see how anyone can fight a man this size and be successful. However if there is anyone who can find a weakness in an opponent is Jeremiah.
Scott Slade: It’s going to come down to speed I think. Jeremiah is much faster. In fact, LuLu Biggs moves around like he’s in slow motion half of the time. Jeremiah has to take advantage of it!
Jeremiah got back on his feet as fast as before and then took off his leather jacket before tossing it out of the ring. It was clear the cyborg was taking a breather and running calculations in the cybernetic half side of his brain on how to beat the enormous LuLu. Once again Jeremiah moved in and locked up with Biggs and once again LuLu used his size and power to swing him back over up against the ropes. This time however Jeremiah spit in his face and then slapped him hard in his man boobs causing the big man to back up. LuLu grew angry and shoved Jeremiah into the ropes and the cyborg returned the favor before the two began firing off closed fisted punches brawling with one another. The fans roared as they watched the two men in the ring beat the living shit out of one another. To LuLu surprise his fist began to bleed from punching Jeremiah’s metallic portions of his face.
Chris Rodgers: Well look at that! Jeremiah using mind games to get inside that referred up fat ass’s slow mind! Very clever!
Scott Slade: Biggs grabs ahold of Jeremiah though! Tosses him into the ropes on the other side of the ring! LuLu with a clothesline, NO! Jeremiah dodges the attack dipping underneath it! Jeremiah off the ropes again and then slides underneath in-between LuLu tree trunk sized legs! Amazing!
Chris Rodgers: Jeremiah back on his feet! Look at him go! Right hands! Right hands!
Vastrix immediately went on the attack nailing Biggs with hard right hands to his face just as he turned around using his agility to his advantage. After delivering multiple right hands, LuLu began to wobble, but continued to stay up right until Jeremiah once again nailed the big man with a powerful super kick to the bottom portion of his jaw. The kick knocked Biggs over like a chopped down oak tree and as he hit the mat the impact rattled the ring and caused the fans to explode in applause.
Chris Rodgers: What a kick by Jeremiah! The cover! ONE! TWO! NO! NO! LuLu kicks out at the last second!
Scott Slade: Jeremiah can’t believe it! That may have been his best chance to finish this thing! Jeremiah got back onto his feet and backed away from his large opponent allowing him to get back on his feet much to the surprise of the commentators and the fans. Biggs this time was clearly rattled from the kick to the jaw and when the two men locked up in the center of the ring Jeremiah was able to move the big behemoth for the first time with his own brute strength. Using this newfound advantage he pushed Biggs toward the corner turnbuckle and then began slamming his face into.
Scott Slade: You can tell this is personal! Jeremiah is not happy with that stunt Biggs pulled before the start of this match.
Chris Rodgers: Vastrix is looking to send the fat man into the opposite turnbuckle now, but LuLu reverses it and sends him back into the turnbuckle they were just fighting in! What a move!
Scott Slade: Biggs rushing over, oh no! Oh! HUGE SPLASH!
Jeremiah let out a sound no one had ever heard him let out before during a match as he stumbled out of the corner completely devastated by Lulu’s massive weight. Biggs grabbed him into a bear hug with both arms before picking him up off the mat and slamming him into it with all of his body weight. Once again the ring shuddered as the fans roared from the massive impact caused by Biggs humongous body. Biggs sat up resting on one knee breathing extremely hard clearly winded by the length of the match as Jeremiah laid on his back also gasping for air for entirely different reason.
Scott Slade: LuLu Biggs out of breath Chris! He needs to make a cover! Endurance could be an issue here. I don’t think he’s used to this long of a fight! Sumo matches are usually over in seconds!
Chris Rodgers: Good point Scotty. Biggs finally with a cover! ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! KICKOUT! How in the hell did Jeremiah find the strength to move that tub of lard off of him! Incredible stuff from the cyborg!
Scott Slade: We’ve had two near falls already! Both of these men want this win!
Chris Rodgers: LuLu Biggs back on his feet! Backing up into the corner opposite Jeremiah! He’s setting up for something big!
Biggs picked up some speed out of the corner like slow powerful locomotive and jumped as high as he could into the air for belly flop pancake slam on Jeremiah, but the cyborg rolled out of the way just at the last second and the big man came up empty. The fans let out an “Ooooh” as LuLu rolled over on his side holding ribs.
Scott Slade: Biggs tried to finish Jeremiah off there but it backfired big time!
Chris Rodgers: All that fat got pushed right into his sternum! That had to feel horrible!
Scott Slade: Jeremiah back on his feet while Biggs is still struggling to get up! Jeremiah grabs him by the head and… DOWN LOW!!! DOWN LOW SWINGING NECKBREAKER!!!
Chris Rodgers: The cover! ONE! TWO! THREE! It’s over! Jeremiah Vastrix wins! Jeremiah wins!
Scott Slade: What a match! I don’t think we’ve ever opened up Friday Night Clash with better fight!
Down Low by R. Kelly begins to play on the Joe’s audio system as Referee Bob Sigro helps Jeremiah up off the mat and raises his hand high in the air declaring him the official winner of the match. Slick Mic and the hookers dive into the ring to check on Biggs who is still unconscious flat on the ring mat. Meanwhile as Vastrix slides out of the ring he’s met by Rose who gives him and hug and another huge kiss on the lips.
Scott Slade: I thought Jeremiah was trying to prove his manhood earlier, but I think there might actually be something going on between those two. Jeremiah, I believe is engaged to actress Olive Cooke!
Chris Rodgers: I think there might be trouble in paradise. I’d hate to be Jeremiah when she catches wind of this! Then again… having two women like them fighting over me…
Scott Slade: Fans we have to take a quick commercial break, but stay with us because when we come back the Tag Team Championship Title belts are on the line!
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Backstage in the cafeteria between the men’s and women’s locker room sat Valora Salinas eating a rather larger protein bar while her protégée, Abbigail was warming up next her. Both women were watching Sean O’Reilly on M.O.X News. His show was called the “Sanity Zone” ironic as that was and the entire focus of the show since they’d sat down was the defacing of McStrump hotel building in Detroit by the Red Vest protestors also known as the Rebels of Society. Valora seemed amused by the hosts ranting and raving about the protestors being anarchist and destroying property all over the city which was a complete lie. The only building that had been damaged to her knowledge was the McStrump hotel and for the most part the protests had been non-violent.
Sean O’Reilly: This is an outrage! Anyone with a red vest on should be behind bars right now! These anarchist need to be locked up for their own good! One of them fell from the building was killed! Splattered all over the sidewalk of President McStrump beautiful valley parking entrance!
Abbigail: Man did he just say someone died?
Valora muted the television and turned to face her apprentice while chewing loudly and making smacking noises with her mouth. It was clear that the protein bar Valora had selected may have been a bit stale, but with food shortages, and the high price of goods Valora knew she couldn’t be too picky or let food go to waste.
Valora: Yeah… more than likely he didn’t check his equipment before he descended down the building. That’s what happens when a bunch of amateurs try pull a dangerous stunt like that. Things are only going to get crazier too if things keep escalating on both sides like they’ve been.
Abbigail: Takuma and his red vest friends sure got under their skins this week with that graffiti mural huh? Crazy stuff to think it made the world news, I bet President McStrump is having a fit right now. Valora: Hahahaha yeah, I bet that orange fuck-wad is shitting his pants right now about that shitty building of his! I wish I was there to see his face.
Abbigail: You think they’re going to get in trouble for it? I mean, I think Takuma has spent enough time behind bars for one life time.
Valora: I think we all have. I doubt they can pin this specifically on them… there really isn’t any way for them to prove he was actually part of it. I don’t think anyone has really publicly declared themselves the leader of the group ether. As far as they know, Takuma is just a celebrity supporter. Still they are taking a lot of risk… someone lost their life just to help them paste that mural on a building.
Suddenly Takuma and Ares walked into the lunch room after having overheard Valora’s and Abbigail’s conversation while in the hallway. Ares was dressed in a white t-shirt and red leather jacket and Takuma was in his wrestling attire and wearing a red protestor vest over it. Sato looked a bit somber, but Ares on the other hand looked very pleased with himself and what they had accomplished the night before.
Ares: Well, well if it isn’t my favorite fighting Latina and her side kick the incredible Abbigail Dresden! I see you’ve caught wind of our little art protest imagery, haha! What do you think?
Valora: It would been funny if it wasn’t for one of your members falling to their death asshole. If it was me in charge I be pretty angry with myself right now.
Ares: Hey sassy pants! Sometimes you got crack few eggs to make omelet! You know what I’m saying dama?
Ares slapped Valora aggressively on her back as if she was sort of “Bro”. Sato and Abbigail stared with their mouths hanging open knowing full well that behavior would not be tolerated by the grumpy Latina. Valora grabbed Metaxas’s arm and locked it into an arm bar submission. Ares screamed out loud, in-between laughing like a crazy person, as he gingerly danced around trying to keep Valora from breaking his arm.
Valora: Listen pendejo! You might be on our side of the political fight, but that doesn’t mean you’re beyond criticism or that you get some sort of free pass with me! You want fight this fight go ahead, but don’t come waltzing in here trying to act all badass in order to impress me!
Ares: Oh come on bella dama! Can’t a man showboat a little before asking her on a date?
Valora slammed Ares face flat onto the table she’d just been sitting at. It was clear she was not amused by Ares attempt at Spanish or his effort to try and win her affection. Sato and Abbigail had already started to snicker as Ares continued to struggle.
Valora: I’m a fucking lesbian you idiot! God help us all if you’re the one in charge of the Red Vest movement!
Ares: Maybe you just haven’t met the right man eh?
Ares smiled in a way that Valora knew that he was only joking now and released him up from the table. Ares readjusted his jacket and regained some of his composure. It was clear Ares had underestimated Valora temper and her strength.
Sato: Honestly V, we feel bad about what happened. At least I do. Frank was a good guy…
Sato looked at Ares with a disapproving look on his face.
Ares: What? Come on! I’m not a psycho. I didn’t want to lose anyone during Project X, but it’s done and over with now. No one can bring Frank back and no one forced him to come with us. Everyone who puts on a red vest knows full well what it means and what we’re fighting for!
Valora: Just be more careful and start taking this shit more serious. You just sent a message McStrump and he’s going to be looking to retaliate against all of you. If I were you I’d cool it on the protests and lay low for a while this blows over. You got your point across and the people are fired up all of the country.
Ares: We won’t stop until he’s ether steps down from office or he’s impeached! So if you don’t feel the same then stay out of our way!
Valora and Ares continued to argue back and forth and eventually Sato grew tired of listening to them and motioned to Abbigail to follow him to the stage. The argument between the two continued to rage on even after Sato and Dresden had left the room with neither of them having noticed they’d left for their match against Evolution and Rayven.
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As the live feed returned, the cameras were once again fixated on Rose Johnston in the center of the ring who was ready to announce the next match. The fans seemed eager and excited to see the Tag Team Titles defended by the fan favorites Sato and Dresden. Signs and swag for the tag team filled the arena and it was clear support was very high for them in Detroit.
Rose: The following matchup is set for one fall and is for the Ultimate Wrestling World Tag Team Championship!
“Are You Ready” by Disturbed hit the sound system and the team of Sato and Abbigail walked out onto the stage to a huge pop from the Detroit faithful. Both fighters had their tag belts draped over their shoulders and looked ready for a serious fight as they made their way down the steel ramp toward the wrestling ring.
Rose: Introducing first from Midwest America! Weighing in at a combined weight of 350 pounds! They are your current Tag Team Champions! Takuma Sato and Abbigail Dresden!
Scott Slade: Well these two haven’t been in action together in a little while, but it should be interesting to see how they fair against the two newest additions to the Ultimate Wrestling roster.
Chris Rodgers: After I saw what Evolution did to Kronin last week, anything can happen tonight! This won’t be a walk in the park for champions, even with all the experience these two carry along with them.
Sato and Abbigail entered the ring and began to warm up after handing over their championship belts to referee Bob Sigro. Suddenly there music was cut off and “Evolution” by Korn began to play on the sound system inside Joe Louis arena. The fans booed harshly as Evolution and Rayven walked out onto the stage and it was clear the Detroit fans were still angry at both wrestlers for their actions the previous week.
Chris Rodgers: This has to be the strangest pairing for a tag team I’ve ever seen.
Scott Slade: Just listen to this crowd. I don’t think I know of anyone else who’s made this negative of an impression with the fan base after one show. These Detroit fans hate these two with a passion!
Chris Rodgers: Well Kronin was a fan favorite and Bob Sigro is a respected man due to his popular podcast “The Sigro Experience” on Me.Tube.com so it makes sense to me.
Evolution and Rayven reached the ring and climbed up onto the mat. Once their music was cut, it was the women from both sides that would start the match off. Rayven and Dresden began to circle one another as the bell sounded officially starting the contest. The two went straight at it and locked up immediately before Rayven gained the advantage and tossed Abbigail into the ropes. Rayven geared up for a powerful clothesline, but Dresden ducked underneath her arm on the bounce back toward her. Rayven then turned around just as Abbigail bounced off of the ropes on the other side of the ring and launched into a flying spinning heel kick that took the young raven haired brunette down to the mat hard and caused the fans to erupt in cheers.
Chris Rodgers: I was hoping we would see these two face off to kick things off here and I’m getting my wish. Many people have been comparing Rayven to a young Valora Salinas, but her opponent tonight is an actual protégé of Salinas. This could be a big way for Dresden to kill that prospective argument and cement herself as top young female athlete in this sport!
Scott Slade: A beautiful move to send a message that’s for sure Chris!
Dresden wasted no time going after Rayven attacking her with some stiff stomp kicks to her ribcage and right shoulder before picking her up by her hair and tossing her back into the ring ropes. Dresden attempted to decapitate Rayven as she came back off the ropes, but Rayven bobbed under her arm before putting on the emergency breaks. She pivoted on a dime to hit Abbigail with a standing spinning heel kick to her face taking her clean off of her feet and onto the wrestling mat. Rayven then picked up Dresden and tossed her into the corner turnbuckle. Abbigail hit the buckles hard and Rayven went after to her attempting a bronco buster, but the agile Chicago native dove out of the way at the last second causing the depraved Rayven to miss and get tangled in the ring ropes. The fans applauded Dresden for her escape and watched as she walked over to her corner and tagged in her partner Takuma Sato.
Scott Slade: Dresden with the tag. Listen to this crowd! Lots of Red Vest Rebels in the arena here tonight!
Chris Rodgers: Every one of these communists’ bastards should be locked up along with Sato! These protestors are wreaking havoc on this city! Just look what they did to President McStrump’s beautiful building!
Scott Slade: Hahaha! Yeah that was great! Sato immediately on the attack kicking the living crap out Rayven with some incredibly stiff martial arts kicks!
Sato, now with the advantage in the corner, grabbed Rayven by her arm, and threw her over his shoulder hard onto the mat with a powerful ipponseoi slam that almost pulled her arm out of her socket. The fans let out a roar after the impact and Sato then made a quick cover on Rayven for the pin.
Scottt Slade: Referee Sigro to the mat! ONE! TWO! No! Kick out by Rayven!
The fans booed heavily as Sato got up frustrated and then pulled his opponent Rayven up by her head only to receive three sharp elbows to the gut. Rayven then darted to the ropes and bounced off of them back toward Sato who attempted a Wushu butterfly kick, but uncharacteristically missed allowing Rayven to grab him by his midsection. With all her womanly strength, Rayven picked up Sato and belly to back suplexed him into the center of the ring. The fans continued to boo as Rayven crawled to her corner on her hands and knees and tagged the massive seven foot tall monster known as Evolution into the ring. Rayven rolled out of the ring breathing heavily as Evoltuion took his time getting inside the ring before stalking slowly over to Takuma Sato still holding his lower spine in pain.
Scott Slade: Here comes Evolution into the match for the first time tonight! Can he adapt to the speed and agility of Sato and Dresden?
Chris Rodgers: Well he is called Evolution isn’t he? The man adapts on the fly! He’s Darwinism in real time!
Sato tried to get back on his feet, but the giant reptilian looking man sprinted in and delivered a massive upper cut taking Sato back off his feet and back onto the wrestling mat. Sato kipped up back onto his feet only to get jacked again by Evolution with an even more powerful uppercut. Sato this time was much slower getting back to his feet allowing the big man scoop him up for a nice scoop slam. Evolution then pointed up to the rafters before making an odd like Herman Monster jog to corner of the ring. The fans watched bewildered as the seven foot, four inch, mountain of a man made his way up to the top rope perching himself on it like bullfrog ready to leap.
Chris Rodgers: This crazy seven foot bastard is going for a high risk maneuver!
Scott Slade: Evolution leaps into the air for a flying leg drop! NO! Oh holy hell! The big man comes up empty! Sato rolled out of the way at the last damn second!
Chris Rodgers: I think Evolution may have broken is tail bone! I don’t think I’ve seen this man in this match pain before!
Evolution sat on his rear end in absolute outcry from the pain radiating up his spine until Sato laid him out flat on the mat with strong savate kick to his face. Sato then summersaulted over Evolution and made tag to his partner Abbigail. Dresden went straight to the top rope of the turnbuckle and vaulted off it attempting a frog splash, but the high flyer also came up empty as Evolution blocked the attack by getting his knees up just in time to protect himself.
Chris Rodgers: My God that had to hurt!
Scott Slade: Both teams pulling out all the stops here Chris! Sadly it’s not paying off!
Dresden collapsed off her opponents large knees onto the mat holding her ribs in a lot of pain as Evolution slowly got back onto his feet and caught his breath. He then pulled Dresden up by her dark dyed pink punkish looking hair and then secured her with his free hand with a chokehold before lifting up Abbigail and taking her for a real nasty ride of a choke slam. The fans then let out an “Oooh Shit” and then immediately began to boo as Evolution made the cover.
Scott Slade: Choke slam and a cover! ONE! TWO! Ohhh! Sato breaks up the pin! Referee Bob Sigro is not happy!
Chris Rodgers: You get one warning in Ultimate Wrestling and after that further interference as the illegal man results in a disqualification. Sato will not want to do that again unless he wants to forfeit the tag team titles.
Scott Slade: Very true Chris! Evolution is back on his feet already and he does not look happy with the Martial Artist.
Chris Rodgers: He needs to ignore him and go back to work on Dresden! She’s in a bad way and there is blood in the water sort of speak! He just needs to finish this off and he and Rayven are walking out of Detroit as tag team champs!
Evolution pulled Dresden back on to her feet, but it was clear the lights were still out for the Chicago native after absorbing that vicious choke slam moments ago. Evolution then locked her into a full-nelson before dragon suplexing her and then making a supreme effort to arch his back in order hold it for a pin. Sato attempted to run in again but this time Rayven cut him off from his blind side with spear which allowed Bob Sigro to make the count.
Scott Slade: This could be it! ONE! TWO! THREE! We have new Ultimate Wrestling Tag Team Champions!
Chris Rodgers: Once again Evolution is the defining element of success! This man is on a role here in Ultimate Wrestling!
“Evolution” by Korn began to play as Referee Bob Sigro lifted Rayven’s and Evolution’s hands up into the air signifying them as the winners of the match. The bell keeper then presented the tag team title belts as Takuma Sato helped Dresden back onto her feet and back up the aisle way frustrated by their defeat.
Rose Johston: The winners of this match and NEW ULTIMATE WRESTLING TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS! THE MALEVOLENT ALLIANCE! EVOLUTION AND RAYVEN!
Scott Slade: Well it looks like a new tag team has been born. Fans we have to take another commercial break but when we come back our main event between Team U.S.A and Team Russia is up next!
Chris Rodgers: Don’t touch that remote damn it!
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Allen Anderson sat his temporary office inside Joe Louis arena with three of LuLu Biggs’s hookers caressing him with soft supple hands. One was messaging his shoulders, the other was rubbing his bald head with her finger tips, and third woman was doing something rather repulsive with her hand down Anderson’s pants. This was all transpiring while he smoked a fat Cuban cigar and sipped on aged Scotch whisky. Across from him sat a frustrated looking Biggs and extremely high Slick Mick who was enjoying a fine blunt he’d just rolled in front of the Vice President of Operations.
Anderson: I think now Mr. Biggs you fully understand the problem I’m having. It’s like nothing I throw at this little shit stain of brat sticks. I’ve hired multiple assassins who’ve failed to get anywhere near him, my own bodyguard was killed earlier this week trying to end his pathetic existence, and now even you failed to put the ass whooping on him in the ring that you promised me.
LuLu Biggs: Muthah fuck’ah got lucky Anderson! Next time I’m going to crush him into scrap metal! You watch playah!
Anderson: Oh, I don’t doubt that… However, I find myself being rather annoyed that he’s been able to get away with so much the past few days. I don’t want him gaining any more confidence. The last thing I need is him thinking he can actually beat me at my own game.
Anderson reached it his expensive suits interior pocket and pulled out a strange looking futuristic device the size of a black magic marker. The little silver looking object had a red button at the base and some sort of high-tech crystal lenses at the tip. LuLu looked at it confused before picking it up and holding up to his face to get a better look at it.
LuLu Biggs: What the fuck is this thing?
Slick Mick: Borther, you ain’t seen Men in Black? That shit make you forget things!
Anderson: No, a good guess though… That my good pimps, is a War Hammer prototype pocket sized EMP emitter that can short out any electrical component within a 25 foot radius. One push of that button and Jeremiah will be as blind as a bat and thinking with only human half side of his brain and trust me I’ve seen his childhood test scores; pure 100% dunce.
LuLu smiled a sinister smile and looked straight directly at his confidant and best friend Slick who smiled back at him revealing a series of gold teeth and sporting the same sinister smile while nodding in agreement.
LuLu Biggs: Why don’t we go pay Robo-Boy visit and teach him that you don’t mess with a pimp in front his ho’s…
Slick Mick: Hell yeah! I’m going shove my pimp cane so far up his ass he’s going need oil change after I’m done with him!
Anderson laid back and relaxed in his chair as the girls tended to his every need. He let out an exhalation of joy as Biggs and Slick got up out of their chairs and made their way to the exit.
storysegment.jpg Allen Anderson sat his temporary office inside Joe Louis arena with three of LuLu Biggs’s hookers caressing him with soft supple hands. One was messaging his shoulders, the other was rubbing his bald head with her finger tips, and third woman was doing something rather repulsive with her hand down Anderson’s pants. This was all transpiring while he smoked a fat Cuban cigar and sipped on aged Scotch whisky. Across from him sat a frustrated looking Biggs and extremely high Slick Mick who was enjoying a fine blunt he’d just rolled in front of the Vice President of Operations.
Anderson: I think now Mr. Biggs you fully understand the problem I’m having. It’s like nothing I throw at this little shit stain of brat sticks. I’ve hired multiple assassins who’ve failed to get anywhere near him, my own bodyguard was killed earlier this week trying to end his pathetic existence, and now even you failed to put the ass whooping on him in the ring that you promised me.
LuLu Biggs: Muthah fuck’ah got lucky Anderson! Next time I’m going to crush him into scrap metal! You watch playah!
Anderson: Oh, I don’t doubt that… However, I find myself being rather annoyed that he’s been able to get away with so much the past few days. I don’t want him gaining any more confidence. The last thing I need is him thinking he can actually beat me at my own game.
Anderson reached it his expensive suits interior pocket and pulled out a strange looking futuristic device the size of a black magic marker. The little silver looking object had a red button at the base and some sort of high-tech crystal lenses at the tip. LuLu looked at it confused before picking it up and holding up to his face to get a better look at it.
LuLu Biggs: What the fuck is this thing?
*Slick Mick: Brother, you ain’t seen Men in Black? That shit make you forget things!
Anderson: No, a good guess though… That my good pimps, is a War Hammer prototype pocket sized EMP emitter that can short out any electrical component within a 25 foot radius. One push of that button and Jeremiah will be as blind as a bat and thinking with only human half side of his brain and trust me I’ve seen his childhood test scores; pure 100% dunce.
LuLu smiled a sinister smile and looked straight directly at his confidant and best friend Slick who smiled back at him revealing a series of gold teeth and sporting the same sinister smile while nodding in agreement.
LuLu Biggs: Why don’t we go pay Robo-Boy visit and teach him that you don’t mess with a pimp in front his ho’s…
Slick Mick: Hell yeah! I’m going shove my pimp cane so far up his ass he’s going need oil change after I’m done with him!
Anderson laid back and relaxed in his chair as the girls tended to his every need. He let out an exhalation of joy as Biggs and Slick got up out of their chairs and made their way to the exit.
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As the feed cut back to ringside the camera was fixated on Rose Johnston in the center of the ring. Johnston had undergone a quick patriotic wardrobe change during the break and was now sporting a red, white, and blue ensemble. She stood in the ring ready to announce the main event match to the fans in attendance as the men gawked at her beauty.
Rose: The following main event matchup is set for one fall and is between the greatest competitive fighters the U.S.A and Russia have to offer! The pride of these two nations is on the line tonight right here in Detroit city!
A “U.S.A” chant began to take hold over the crowd in the Joe as they started to get fired up for the highly anticipated match. The crowd then abruptly erupted into boos as the Russian national anthem began to play for Boris Drago and Dasha Ivanova.
Rose: Making their way onto the stage now, hailing from Moscow Russia! Weighing in at a combined weight of 530 pounds! The seven foot, three inch, monster known Siberia over as Boris Drago and his partner the deadly femme fatal Dasha Ivanova!!!
Boris and Dasha walked out onto the stage with ice in their veins and a laser like focus on the objective they were assigned to complete by the Kremlin itself. Boris was a massive man, with a shaved head, and covered in scars from fighting bears in the wilderness. Over the course of his military career he’d been sent on hundreds of missions for the Russian government in the northern wild remote regions of the Siberian country side. The woman, Dasha was a stern, well-built woman, with the personality of a brick and the empathy of lizard. She wore a strange authoritarian uniform unlike her comrade who was dressed more like an Olympic weight lifter in a red spandex leotard.
Chris Rodgers: Look at these Russian rejects! I find it offensive that they’ve even been invited here. I don’t know what Mr. Mudcock is thinking! Ever since that Anderson became VP of Operations here at Ultimate Wrestling thing’s around here have been changing and not for the better!
Scott Slade: Come on now Chris. President McStrump says the Russians are cool brother…
Chris Rodgers: Just because I voted for the man doesn’t mean I have to agree with everything he says and does damn it!
Scott Slade: Alright! Alright! Settle down old man. You baby boomers… so sensitive.
As the Russians reached the ring, they made their way up the steel steps, and began to warm up for their American opponents. As their music was cut “I Am a Real American” began to play on the arena’s speaker system. The Ultimate Wrestling Franchise Champion Huckleberry was the first to walk out from behind the curtain with his championship belt strapped around his waist. The fans gave the champ a mixed reaction until his arch nemesis Valora walked out behind him. The entire arena exploded into an absolute frenzy when the Latina walked out from behind the curtain. It was clear that Huckleberry was jealous of Valora’s incredible fan support and he stared at her coldly as they made their way through aisle.
Rose: Their opponents!!! TEAM U.S.A.!!! Weighing in at a combined weight of 304 pounds! The Ultimate Wrestling Franchise Champion Huckleberry! And the former Franchise Champion and current Submission Specialist Champion… Valora!!! Salinas!!!
Scott Slade: The big question here is can these two work together Chris?
Chris Rodgers: Hell if I know, but they better set their shit aside and work as a damn team, otherwise it’s going to be an embarrassing night for all of us!
Valora and Huckleberry reached the ring and began arguing over who would start the match first for their side. Meanwhile Dasha had already decided that Boris would be the first to fight for their side. She was a fierce, fiery, and ferocious woman and while shouting commands at Boris you could see she commanded his respect. Valora saw that Boris was starting first for the Russians and instantly gave in, and allowed Huckleberry to kick things off for their side in order to avoid having to fight an unknown giant of a man.
Chris Rodgers: So here we go. The whole world is watching. Nationalistic pride on the line. The stakes could not be higher Scott.
Scott Slade: Takes me back to the Cold War Chris. In a lot of ways, the Cold War is back and bigger than ever… this just seems fitting to me.
Chris Rodgers: Sadly, I couldn’t agree more Scott.
Referee Bob Sigro brought Boris and Huckleberry to the center of the ring and began having words with both of them about his rules and his expectations for the match. The atmosphere in the arena was electric and no one watching could help but make a David and Goliath reference between the two wrestlers. Sigro signaled for the bell and as soon as the bell had rung, Boris went straight after the little Appalachian hillbilly with extreme ferocity. He kicked him straight in the gut and then planted his head between his legs. He then began laughing as Huckleberry wriggled and squirmed trying to break free between his powerful muscular man thighs. The Detroit fans booed heavily as Boris jack-knife power bombed Huckleberry straight into the wrestling mat with extreme prejudice.
Scott Slade: Good God!
Chris Rodgers: That hulking Russian bastard just annihilated Huckleberry!
Huckleberry hit the mat hard and was sprawled out in a daze as Boris placed his right foot onto his chest confidently while pretending to yawn. Sigro dove to the mat to make the count, but somehow instinctively the little hillbilly immediately got his shoulder up as soon as he heard the referee pound the mat for the first time.
Scott Slade: Huckleberry somehow still conscious after that vicious power bomb!
Chris Rodgers: Look at the arrogance of this ugly communist bear of a man. He tried to pin our Franchise champion with one foot! It’s going to take a lot more than that pin old Huckleberry though!
Scott Slade: He’s a resilient little hick that’s for sure Chris.
Valora watched with wide eyes as Boris reached down and grabbed the little Appalachian by his wrestling leotard in order pull him up off the mat and onto his feet. He then angrily tossed him into their corner and demanded that Valora get in the ring with him. Valora slapped Huckleberry in the back of the head before stepping into the ring. She then with no remorse, tossed her own tag team partner through the ropes onto the floor like a useless bag of trash. The fans roared with excitement and applauded Valora’s disregard for Huckleberry.
Chris Rodgers: What the hell is that crazy Latina doing? She just tossed her own partner on the floor! She just can’t be a team player that one! She can’t put country ahead of personal interest! She’s just a bad seed! Always has been! Always will be!
Scott Slade: I have to agree partly Chris. I think she’s going to need all the help she can get against this Boris Drago right now.
Valora rushed Boris and the Russian instinctively attempted to big boot her in the face. Valora used her incredible agility to slide through his legs to avoid the attack. Salinas was quick to get back on her feet and the slower Boris turned around just in time to receive swift kick to the groin much to Bob Sigro’s frustration. Boris keeled over unable to shrug off the low blow and Valora used the opportunity to unleash a can of whoop ass on the big Russian striking him repeatedly in the face with hard right hands. Valora pummeled Boris back into the ropes and then slung him across the ring to the other side. Valora then took off toward Boris and attempted to spear him, but the impact had the opposite desired out come as Valora collapsed to the mat like she’d hit a brick wall. Boris stood their staring down at the Latina before bursting into laughter.
Chris Rodgers: Wow! The unstoppable force that is Valora just ran into the immovable object that is Drago and got stopped dead in her tracks!
Scott Slade: Boris seems to be thoroughly enjoying this Chris. Look at him! He’s just laughing at her! I think Valora may have injured her shoulder on that spear attempt. It was like she ran into a tree or something!
Boris grabbed Valora around her waist and then gut-wrench sit down power bombed her. He then attempted to hold Valora for a pin. Once again Sigro dove to the wrestling canvas for the count, but Valora kicked out after only a count of one, breaking free from her larger Russian opponent with pure aggression. Valora got to her feet and looked to make a tag to Huckleberry who was now back on the ring mat behind the ropes and extending his hand. Valora dove to make the tag, but Huckleberry purposely pulled his hand away. He began scratching his head pretending to be confused before giving Valora the double fingered salute. He then jumped down from the ring back onto the floor and started heading back toward the stage.
Chris Rodgers: What the hell?
Scott Slade: I think Huckleberry is over this! I think that stunt Valora pulled sealed the deal. He’s walking out!
Huckleberry began to walk back up the ramp leaving Valora alone with the Russian duo. Boris grabbed Valora by her hair and tossed her into their corner where Ivanova was waiting. Dasha ran up and nailed Valora in the back of the head with a powerful discus elbow shot. Valora collapsed to the mat as Boris walked over to her and began stomping a Russian 14 inch sized mud hole in her. Meanwhile the fans had completely lost it chanting “Fuckle-berry is a Trader” over and over as he made his way up the ramp. Just as the little Appalachian turned around to give everyone in the arena the finger, the same masked man who had attacked Valora during the Hell In the Cell 4 way match during Friday Night Clash 8 rushed out and tackled the hillbilly to the ground and began beating on him.
Chris Rodgers: What the hell? That’s that star spangled masked man who attacked Valora weeks ago! Why on earth is he attacking Huckleberry?
Scott Slade: Who the hell is this guy and what does that R on his forehead even stand for?
Chris Rodgers: Wait a minute! He’s dragging Huckleberry back to the ring kicking and screaming! I think he wants him to get back in the fight!
Scott Slade: Just when I thought I’d seen it all…
The man in the blue cowl tossed Huckleberry back into the ring and began shouting and pointing at the two Russians who were too occupied with stomping Valora half to death to notice them. The fans roared with excitement as Huckleberry got back onto his feet and realized he was being forced to fight by this strange man in a mask. With his pathway to the locker rooms blocked he turned his attention to the Russians who had now noticed him and were coming his way. Huckleberry bounced off the ropes and ducked under both their arms as they tried to clothesline him. As he bounced off the other side of the ring ropes and came toward them he attempted to go for some sort of move, but instead Borris picked him up over his head giving the incredibly athletic Dasha the opportunity to jump into the air and together deliver an epic 3D Dudley Death Drop they call the Hammer and Sickle.
Chris Rodgers: Good God! I think they broke his neck!
Scott Slade: This is not going well. At least he’s not the legal man in the ring.
Valora had managed to crawl back up onto her feet with the help of the turnbuckles as support. Dasha rushed in, grabbed her by her head, and then catapulted to the center of the ring where Boris delivered a violent guillotine clothesline that whiplashed Valora into a 360 before she landed hard on her back on the ring mat. The Detroit fans booed relentlessly as he covered her for a pin.
Scott Slade: Ooooh man! Valora will be in a neck brace for a week after that!
Chris Rodgers: Boris with a pin!
Scott Slade: ONE! TWO! THREE! No! I can’t believe it! The Russians have defeated us on our home soil!
Chris Rodgers: I’ve never… I’ve never been more embarrassed to call myself an American Scott! This is a travesty!
The Russian national anthem began to play loudly as referee Bob Sigro reluctantly raised Boris and Dasha’s hands into the air officially declaring them the winners of the tag team bout. The masked man who had drug Huckleberry back to the ring looked furious as the Russians celebrated. He quickly reached into what could only be described as a utility belt much Batman would wear and pulled out a police taser before sliding into the ring.
Scott Slade: Wait minute! This star spangled nut jobs actually getting the ring! I think he’s got a taser! This idiots going to cause nightmare international incident!
Chris Rodgers: Hell yeah! It’s about time someone did something!
Dasha and Boris never saw the cowled crusader coming as he came up from behind and sent a nerve shattering shock up Boris’s spine. The large seven foot Russian’s body contorted in unusual way for a good ten seconds before the big man collapsed to the wrestling mat. The fans roared in a frenzy as Dasha turned around to receive a nasty shock straight in the chest that blasted her hard onto her backside flat on the mat. The Russian brunette convulsed violently on the mat and began to froth at the mouth like a dog with rabies.
Scott Slade: He’s single handedly taken them out with damn weapon!
Chris Rodgers: And these fans are God damn loving it!
Security and the medical team lead by Dr. William Drake rushed out from behind the curtain and down the steel ramp toward the ring. As soon as the masked man saw them coming he reached into his utility belt yet again and pulled out what look like grappling gun and fired into the rafters. Just as security rushed into the ring the patriotic figure was pulled up into the rafters of Joe Louis arena like some kind of super hero. The security team watched as he disappeared quickly once he’d reached upper scaffolding of the ceiling.
Chris Rodgers: I can’t believe what I’ve just witnessed with my own two eyes! So many unanswered questions!
Scott Slade: Sadly they won’t be answered tonight. Fans we are out of time! From all of us here at Ultimate Wrestling tune in next as we travel the Louisville Kentucky for Friday Night Clash 12! Good night everyone!
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Washington State: Mt. Vernon
The Sanctuary of the Blob
Inside the compound
8 Hours after FNC – 11
Janus and his acolytes stood in front of a new massive anti-chamber they had built for their watery master. Since consuming Ronald McStrump Jr. and the 32 secret service members who had accompanied him on their failed mission to abduct the Blob creature, it had grown at least ten times over in size. Not only had it grown in magnitude, but the God like creature had sprouted six large squid like tentacles, fish like eyes, and a mouth in which speak to his acolytes, worshipers, and minions. The Blob’s skin color was purple like octopus and it floated in its seawater tank with ease and elegance. It was a sight to behold and it took Janus’s breath away every time he walked in to speak with his lord.
Janus: You wanted to speak with us your grace?
The Blob: Yes… I have lost my control of President McStrump.
Janus: How can this be?
The Blob: How it came to be is none of your concern Janus! Your concern should be how to stop the force McStrump will be sending here to exterminate us and the commune we’ve built here! McStrump is a prideful and vengeful man. He will seek retribution in my destruction. You must defend me and the compound at all costs!
Janus: My lord, why not simply shield us as you did from the North Koreans missile strike?
The Blob: I am far too weak for that sort of miracle Janus. I would need to feed and I refuse to consume my own followers. No, this is a fight you and your brothers and sisters must fight. I will help where I can, but I cannot win this fight alone. Take your strongest warrior acolytes and the surviving mutates of the Mt. Vernon community and prepare for all-out war.
Janus: As you wish my lord…
To be continued!
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