Drown in my Chaos (Tag Title RP)

[Drago]

---

---

---

---

August 28th, of the Lord's Year 2019.
Kalamazoo, Michigan

---

The scene opens to display one-half of the XHF Tag Team Champions, Drago Santiago, sitting comfortably inside of his hotel room - it’s unlike others in Japan, because as a true midwestern boy, he isn’t settling for all that secret room wu shai bullshit. Instead, this is a hotel room more comparable to a Motel 6 : hot tub in the room, massive king bed, papers all over, blood from Kai’s earlier antics on the carpet, wrestling gear left and right, and pictures from a variety of underwhelming Sakura-Gun matches stapled to each and every wall. 

SANTIAGO

Ever since I did less fighting internationally, my Japanese has gotten sloppier and sloppier. Same with my French, my Gaelic, whatever. When it comes to promos across languages, I always debate taking notes to cut these unplanned promos, but I always prefer it be sloppy. But when your opponents don’t have anything substantial to say, does it matter? Let’s do this raw. Let’s be sloppy.

Drago sneers a little, reaching over to the controls of the machine to turn up the intensity. Water gets everywhere, but Drago’s relatively comfortable considering that water damage isn’t likely to compare to any of the mess of the room. Food boxes discarded in various corners of the room without a word, blood trailing to the door, etc. 

SANTIAGO

I get a lot of attention because of being a strategist, being a genius in the ring, and being able to perfectly predict which combination of traits will work to put together a successful team. It’s this silly little trope that lazier journalists and fans like to use for fighters like me. Smaller, not covered in muscles, whatnot. You like to ignore that I’ve got a black belt in Judo and a mastery of Krav Maga, you like to ignore that I’ve taken on top talents across the world, and whatever. It’s blase. I expect nothing better. I know what I look like. It’s why I was surprised - when I announced my allegiance with Maverick I expected something… different. 

Drago is speaking from the hot tub, of course - while his pale, heavily tattooed body is on display from this tub, the most eye-catching detail comes from the gold-plated XHF Tag Team championship over his shoulder, soaking in the bubbles along with the champion. 

SANTIAGO

I remember announcing that I was working with Maverick. You should’ve seen the comments. ‘Oh, what a bright move from the newbie!’ ‘Oh, this guy won a few matches, eligible for a title shot, taking mentorship from a true competitor.’ ‘This… news about one of AWF’s Dragons is pretty exciting. I hope he has a long road ahead of him.’ No one cared, but everyone approved. 

Santiago looks at his reflection in that tag title, as if to judge the character of the man holding it through gold-tinted lenses. Judging by his smile, he’s enjoying what he sees. 

SANTIAGO

Soon afterwards, we announce that we’re going to become a tag team, and we are going to make a public challenge for the XHF Tag Team titles against the Nihilists. You’d have thought that we did something absurd, like acknowledge the {No Means No} of the Chinese by you Japanese imperialists. You’d have thought we killed the fucking Emperor. 

Santiago snorts in light laughter. 

SANTIAGO

‘Who do these guys think they are?’ ‘Can they prove they can work as a tag team?’ ‘They haven’t won a single match, and they think their singles careers qualifies them for a tag win?’ If these were messages that I saw in my mentions on Twitter, I wouldn’t mouth off about it. I don’t really care too much about what you smarks have to think. Instead, the real surprise bit me: the call is coming from INSIDE the house. From within the lockerrooms of AWF, RSW, and shows across the network, all of these tag teams had their realities shut down and they were going to throw the biggest shitshow they could about it. 

Hatred almost pours from his canines, drooling from his teeth - lucky for Sakura GUN, hyenas aren’t venomous. 

SANTIAGO

After all, these boys had a hustle organized.

Drago raises his hands for the less-visual of his fans - to try to paint a pretty picture for them to follow along as he speaks. This metaphor requires one hand in a fist, and another hand laying flat. 

SANTIAGO

The Nihilists were unstoppable, but they’re famous internationally. Losing to them? RSW was a target. XHF global shows? Cakewalks. Guaranteed rent for at least one month. Nihilists would go from federation to federation, beating down amateur talent, the people they beat get to eat for a month, and the federation gets to sell out an arena to show their home-grown talent getting their asses beat by the best talent to bother stepping into their federation. I’m sorry boys, but I prefer to keep it sloppy. For all the strategies I figure out, my best campaigns start in media res - ‘in the midst of things’. 

To explain the complicated dynamic between the Nihilists and the rest of the tag team division, Drago opts for punching his flat hand everytime he mentions RSW or a global show, he punches his flat hand. 

SANTIAGO

Drago and Maverick threatened the XHF Tag Team division, and every team has a strong opinion about it… until Maverick and I ask any and every team that’d have an opinion about our tag challenge to meet us in the ring. RSW? Quiet. AWF? The Nihilists tried to prove their point by meeting Maverick and I in the ring, and it ended with my DDTing Gebin into the mat and pinning him for the one-two-three. The division tried to hamstring me - I threatened the system, and the system threatened me in return. In response?

Maverick and I, not even close enough to exchange phone numbers, beat the Nihilists, beat former champs in a four way match against the Nihilists, Borgs, and WAHmachine, and we held these title belts over our heads. Maverick and I weren’t an organized army. We were absolute strangers, I didn’t even know his first name, and I could hardly listen to him with that fucking accent… but we both had one thing in common: we both spoke wrestling. Nothing else mattered.

Drago snorts at the thought of teaming with that fucking snake. Still, even with a man he grew to loathe, he managed to be successful.

SANTIAGO

When you speak wrestling, you don’t even need to use your words to communicate. Language barriers become nonexistent. Maverick and I were introduced to one another in the ring, and we had to learn one another while fighting against the top competition in the network. The Nihilists were a team that went undefeated for ages, and only found competition in Team Viper. They were famous for their legendary speed and dexterity, and they had a moveset that allowed two men of smaller size to hit you with moves powerful to kill an elephant. Their moves were so amazing that many give into the instinct to watch them - including their opponents. Take your eyes off of them for one moment and get kicked in the face from angles you didn’t know were possible. Maverick and I took these men apart - because once you’re in the ring with two people who understand one another, everything else comes naturally. I targeted arms and legs, stripping this undefeatable team of their best moves, The Icons isolated both of these men and beat the piss out of them, and Maverick and I exposed them as what them as what they were: an amazing team consisting of two not-so-impressive team members. 

So Sakura GUN, I will defer to you whenever you make a point that is correct. I am new to working with Draven. I am new to working with Killa Kai. Just like I was new to working with Maverick. But are you going to be a be better than a tag team that was unstoppable across the network when you can’t put together impressive wins on the global tag team network?

Drago shakes his head in sheer disbelief. 

SANTIAGO

It’s why I hate regional stars. You women are Wichita State in Men’s College Basketball. You get this amazing record every year because you fight absolutely nobody, and as soon as you compete against real talent outside of your division… you fold. You fight mediocre talent and you boost and boost about your accomplishments and awards over mediocre talent. It’s an organized effort. SSS tag team of the year? That’d be impressive if there was an SSS team in recent memory capable of winning the XHF tag team titles. After all, being the fastest runner on the field doesn’t matter when you’re competing at the Special Olympics. SSS brags about how frequently they compete. They brag about how on network shows, they’re always eager to have their low-calibre fighters fight one another. I confess… those matches have a purpose, yes.

Those matches are called bathroom breaks. 

Any memorable X-Crown championships in SSS history? No? Not even memorable X-Crown competitors?

Talent is something that you prove. Let’s see about Drago vs. SSS talent. Mamoka Honda in the Battle of the Best? I manhandled her the entire match and I made her scream for me. 

Drago offers a predatory grin. The phrasing was intentional.

AWF Icons vs. Sakura Gun? Iconic Destroyer, instant win. One, two, three.

SANTIAGO

Maverick and I beat you two while he was navigating whether or not to retire. He had just fought in an X-Crown match and an AXW title match. The two of us had no chemistry, completely different interests… and we put you both away. You two cannot seem to manage to beat top talent. Maverick and I, working together, submitted a team consisting of the X-Crown Champion Seth, and the AWF Prestige Champion Raiden. Every single show, we’re competing against the best talents in the network, whether in AXW, AWF, MCCW, wherever. You beat up irrelevant fish in an irrelevant pond and brag about your recreation league accolades. Join us in the NBA sometime over in AWF, yeah?

Drago sneers at his comparison, and smiles from cheek to cheek with this massive cheshire grin. 

SANTIAGO

There’s this sick little duality in this argument you two keep making so consistently. ‘Drago and Kai? A joke. They don’t know one another, they’ve got no chemistry, so they don’t stand a chance, yes?’

More sarcasm that’s so powerful that it’s almost a radioactive threat comparible to Chernobyl. 

SANTIAGO

But Drago and Maverick had no chemistry, and we managed to beat an unstoppable tag team in The Nihilists. Drago and Draven have no chemistry, and we teamed with Kai to eliminate six men in the Fired Up Battle Royale and last from the beginning of the royale and make it so-very-close to the end. I am able to do the unthinkable with men I hardly know simply because wrestling is a universal language. My ability to understand fighters is why I’m feared across the network for my ability to take fighters apart, but it also aids me in understanding partners, new or no. 

Drago’s hand slaps down on that tag title a few times, proudly sending water everywhere in the hotel room. 

SANTIAGO

You bunch boast about being a cult, yes? Or an army? You bunch have been working together for so long, yet… on your best night with a mission, you lot can’t put up a fight against XHF Tag Champion talent. You all can organize, you can prepare, you can communicate in Japanese to make sure your opponents can’t understand, you can go into gyms to specifically train to counter your opponents best moves… and it doesn’t seem to make a difference. 

SANTIAGO

Cut another promo. Cut sixty promos about whichever argument fits your need at the moment you record it. You have my permission. Because no matter which combination of women we fight in SSS, neither of them will have XHF success or accomplishments, and they’ll instead become one of my accomplishments when I submit them. Organize and strategize as you like - I prefer my chaos unorganized.

The scene cuts out to Nathan sinking into the water, relaxing without a worry in the world, and taking his tag title belt with him as the camera fades to black.