Politika (ZS RP 01)
Jan 6, 2020 4:04:20 GMT -5
Mongo the Destroyer, Dave D-Flipz, and 2 more like this
Post by mosler on Jan 6, 2020 4:04:20 GMT -5
[Our scene opens on the busy headquarters of Syndicate Wrestling And Tradition, the videographer weaves around frantic production assistants that dart down busy corridors. Road agents, talent scouts, accountants, human resources, on the eve of the companies flagship pay per view, everyone is worked to the breaking point. In spite of the chaos that swirls around him, one man manages to keep his cool. Herb from maintanence stands in front of a closed door, patiently engraving the glass...]
[ZS places both lists onto a stack of papers in the corner of his desk. Eagle eyed viewers may notice a nostril flare in rage, but this human reaction lasts less than a second. Ever the politician, Sainovic is quick to compose himself.]
Zoran Sainovic: My name is Zoran Sainovic. I have over two decades of experience in our sport of choice. Ze past six months I have mostly been working behind ze scenes at SWAT, but have recently returned to active competition, as well as being named ze acting commissioner. At ze moment I might push more paperwork zan pump irons, but let me assure you, I still have Luthor Blake's number. Like his 57 IQ. Unlike Mister Blake, regardless of how I make my income zrough it, I am very much a wrestler. Proud of it.
[Lifting the large stack of papers off his desk, Sainovic shakes his head.]
Zoran Sainovic: I apologize for <waving stack around> ze state of the place. My promotion was fairly recent, and ze woman who previously held the position was a hot mess. It's rather embarrassing, zough not half as bad as Blake's confrontation. Picking on ze mentally handicap is not a good look zese days. <chuckle> Yet here I am doing it to poor Luthor.
[The SWAT brass starts to feed the papers into a shredder...]
COMMISSIONER
ZORAN SAI
[The rest of the offices all have small metal plates to denote the occupants. Easily swapped out with new staff. Zoran Sainovic figures there is job security in the glass etching. The cost to replace the glass might make the owner think a minute about hiring a new commissioner. Sainovic can do a lot in a minute, like kick all of Luthor Blake's teeth down his throat. Sainovic would never utter such threats aloud, finding generic promises of violence to be amongst the saddest trash talk a wrestler can resort to. What is this, the 80s? Its almost as big a pet peeve as shooting interviews in which you prove your merit by attacking non-combatants. Viewers come to these conclusions about ZS's character while waiting for Herb to finish etchig the "n" into the door. That is a lot of work. Realizing Herb may be there for some time, the videographer coughs, offering an awkward nod, as the irritated maintenance man scowls and opens the door.]
"Frostbite's feud with Suzi... talk about zrowing us a bone."
[An Eastern European male in his 40s sits behind a mahogany desk. Captivating promotional materials for the XHF Networks Battle for Hegemony by the advertising agency of The Cosmo Kid, lead you to recognize Zoran Sainovic. Decked out in a mauve suit, which stands out smartly against the light colours of the office, SWAT's interim commissioner was in the middle of examining two pieces of paper. In his right hand is a list of SWAT's year end awards. In his left fist, the nominations for the XHF network's year end awards. One seems slightly more crumpled.]
Zoran Sainovic <warm smile>: Good afternoon XHF. Your reputation proceeds you. I would normally hope that introductions wouldn't be necessary...
[The smile fades as Sainovic raises the list in his left hand, waving it at the camera.]
Zoran Sainovic: ...But zis suggests otherwise.
ZORAN SAI
[The rest of the offices all have small metal plates to denote the occupants. Easily swapped out with new staff. Zoran Sainovic figures there is job security in the glass etching. The cost to replace the glass might make the owner think a minute about hiring a new commissioner. Sainovic can do a lot in a minute, like kick all of Luthor Blake's teeth down his throat. Sainovic would never utter such threats aloud, finding generic promises of violence to be amongst the saddest trash talk a wrestler can resort to. What is this, the 80s? Its almost as big a pet peeve as shooting interviews in which you prove your merit by attacking non-combatants. Viewers come to these conclusions about ZS's character while waiting for Herb to finish etchig the "n" into the door. That is a lot of work. Realizing Herb may be there for some time, the videographer coughs, offering an awkward nod, as the irritated maintenance man scowls and opens the door.]
"Frostbite's feud with Suzi... talk about zrowing us a bone."
[An Eastern European male in his 40s sits behind a mahogany desk. Captivating promotional materials for the XHF Networks Battle for Hegemony by the advertising agency of The Cosmo Kid, lead you to recognize Zoran Sainovic. Decked out in a mauve suit, which stands out smartly against the light colours of the office, SWAT's interim commissioner was in the middle of examining two pieces of paper. In his right hand is a list of SWAT's year end awards. In his left fist, the nominations for the XHF network's year end awards. One seems slightly more crumpled.]
Zoran Sainovic <warm smile>: Good afternoon XHF. Your reputation proceeds you. I would normally hope that introductions wouldn't be necessary...
[The smile fades as Sainovic raises the list in his left hand, waving it at the camera.]
Zoran Sainovic: ...But zis suggests otherwise.
[ZS places both lists onto a stack of papers in the corner of his desk. Eagle eyed viewers may notice a nostril flare in rage, but this human reaction lasts less than a second. Ever the politician, Sainovic is quick to compose himself.]
Zoran Sainovic: My name is Zoran Sainovic. I have over two decades of experience in our sport of choice. Ze past six months I have mostly been working behind ze scenes at SWAT, but have recently returned to active competition, as well as being named ze acting commissioner. At ze moment I might push more paperwork zan pump irons, but let me assure you, I still have Luthor Blake's number. Like his 57 IQ. Unlike Mister Blake, regardless of how I make my income zrough it, I am very much a wrestler. Proud of it.
[Lifting the large stack of papers off his desk, Sainovic shakes his head.]
Zoran Sainovic: I apologize for <waving stack around> ze state of the place. My promotion was fairly recent, and ze woman who previously held the position was a hot mess. It's rather embarrassing, zough not half as bad as Blake's confrontation. Picking on ze mentally handicap is not a good look zese days. <chuckle> Yet here I am doing it to poor Luthor.
[The SWAT brass starts to feed the papers into a shredder...]
Zoran Sainovic: Zat is not why Blake is going to lose, however...
[Before the XHF ballot can join the sensitive documents in becoming confetti, Sainovic rescues it.]
Zoran Sainovic: Syndicate Wrestling And Tradition is one of ze premier federations of ze XHF. Over zis past year, it has been one of ze more prolific members of ze organization, with a dizzying show output and active fanbase. While ze other promotions cannibalize ze same core audience, SWAT brings fresh eyes to all of our products. Our fans might not be as vocal on discord, but if we were only interested in courting internet trolls, Luthor Blake would be on our roster. As a dozen other fledgling companies flocked to ze XHF only to die, and a number of prominent members were closed in 2019, SWAT continues to flourish. <nodding his head politely> Hvala vam.
As acting commissioner of SWAT, I look forwards to continuing our shared success.
I wish I could tell you ZAT was my reason for joining ze X*Crown title hunt. <sardonic smile> I really do.
<smile fades> Although on *most* paper we have a mutually beneficial arrangement, to look at our results on shared events, it might appear to outsiders zat we were ze enhancement talent feeder fed in ze relationship.
Winless. Worthless. Jokes.
I like jokes as much as ze next man. Youtube videos of ze blind walking into traffic. Animals running into glass doors zey zink are open. Babies first steps into cacti. Amy Schumer. My sense of humour is apparently Luthor Blake strong. Zough I will laugh at ze sad joke that is Blake bragging about how much spending money he walks ze streets with, while carrying his own gym bags like he couldn't afford a nice gym, I draw ze line at our XHF results. Not funny.
Is it zat ze championship committee are an old boys society zat will only slot in challengers zat get Hyperion in-jokes?
Of course not. Humour is subjective.
Could we lose more often because of our opponents are getting preferential officiating? Referees with fast counts, our chairshots being more scrutinized zan ze other guys? Anything is possible. Hell, could it just be zat every time zere is a random draw we end up paired up with one of ze fiercest competitors in ze first round? <shrug> No shame in losing to ze best.
See, while zose all sound like wild conspiracies, zere is probably a kernel of truth to it - even if it's subconscious. "Screw the new guys. Make them pay dues. One day someone will be newer and we'll be forced to grudgingly embrace SWAT's seniority, but today is not that day!" I get it. I get it here. I'm relatively new to SWAT, yet I am representing ze company at ze largest stage. Me being in zis spot is ruffling some feathers... but I'm okay with bruising ze boys feelings, because after a year of choking in front of ze other federations, it is time for a change.
See I don't care about all zose jobs SWAT did before, because I wasn't with ze company. Screw SWAT. I'm here now, in MY SWAT.
Besides, for all ze blame I placed on XHF, SWAT has no one to blame but zemselves. Zey are zeir own worst enemy.
Isolationism. As ze new guys around, zey didn't want to send zeir top tier talent to Night of Champions or Eve of Destruction. What if our world champion lost to some putz MCCW student? <double take> He could, zey're good. You never see Radu Matei, Suzi, Timeless, Syberus or Johnny Valentine show up at ze interfed events. Zey're protected. Zey don't mix with ze GCW or AWF crew until trust is stronger. Trust? Its hard to build trust in our current cycle. We send ze XHF our most pathetic competitors like Psychotic Goth, Frostbite, Lynn Brewster and Rajiv Khan, zen scratch our heads like assholes when those chumps lose.
Losers lose.
It is not rocket science.
Fortunately, zat was ze old administration.
[Leaning back in his leather chair, Zoran puts his feet up, gleefully looking forwards to letting the other shoe drop.]
Zoran Sainovic: Still, because of zat oversight in common sense, we now have a situation where it looks like XHF's legacy promotions get preferential treatment. An outrageous allegation, I know, but one zat needs to be rectified. <deadpan> For all ze karma our jobbers amassed zrough public humiliation, <big smile> I'm here to collect!
Weaker opponents zrough "random" draws, faster counts, a clear path to a belt?! <raising a hand to object> I would never suggest zat any of zat toxic crap happens, but if it does? It's my time to shine! <eyes flash> Even if I was a ringer <smirk> or something, it wouldn't matter.
[Leaning back forwards in his chair, Zoran looks down at XHF's best and brightest.]
Zoran Sainovic: So you can be ze toughest gym rat in town, Luthor "breaker of bones" Blake... because in our little contest? You're just the easiest win zey could assign me. I'll give you ze edge on roid rage and questionable supporting cast, but when you take me on, none of zat matters! Better wrestler? Congratulations. Fighter in a wrestler's world? Sounds like a sweet gig, way to go!
[Shaking his head, Sainovic feeds the ballot into the shredder.]
Zoran Sainovic: I'm ze commissioner of SWAT, and when you step in ze ring with me, you're not fighting a man... you're fighting...
Politics.
...And you've already lost.
[Fiendish grin creeping across his smug face, Zoran Sainovic swivels in his chair, turning his back to the camera. The videographer pulls back, panning over to the now finished door. The name looks good. You are going to remember it.]