The Nightmare Before Christmas
Oct 24, 2020 14:28:44 GMT -5
Mongo the Destroyer, Dave D-Flipz, and 4 more like this
Post by mosler on Oct 24, 2020 14:28:44 GMT -5
{{Grasping a fishing rod in his tiny tyrannosaur hands, The Dread Lord dangles a SNICKERS bar next to a nursery playground - hoping to catch dinner. Increasingly uncomfortable with the situation, his elderly cowboy manager tries to move things forwards.}}
Bill Stokes: We should hit the road. Big week coming up, your INFERNO debut...
Dinosaur Bones: How am I supposed to continue the 5 Minutes To Live tour without sustenance? A tiny mammal is just what I need to get through the... a bite!
{{As a toddler grabs the SNICKERS bar, Dinosaur Bones reels him in!}}
Bill Stokes: Come on Bonsey, I don't want to end up on a list like your last manager, Frank Wilkes!
Dinosaur Bones <holding up catch>: Nuts. Another Dracula.
{{The child is dressed as Dracula.}}
Bill Stokes: You get that-
Dinosaur Bones: I am no cannibal.
{{The undead lizard throws the child in the vampire cape back into the playground.}}
Bill Stokes: You know that was a costume right?
Dinosaur Bones: . . .
Bill Stokes: My species youth dress up like scary monsters for Halloween...
Dinosaur Bones: Ah yes, the birthday of Jesus.
Bill Stokes: No, that is Christmas.
Dinosaur Bones: And Halloween?
Bill Stokes: Well the kids dress up going door to door collecting candy.
Dinosaur Bones: And how do the senior members of your species defend against these pint size marauding menaces?
Bill Stokes: ...they give them candy.
{{...}}
{{...a lightbulb goes off over the inflatable zombie T-Rex costume.}}
Dinosaur Bones: ..............free candy...?
Bill Stokes: Well, for the kids.
Dinosaur Bones: As many calories as I need for the rest of my afterlife...
Bill Stokes: In costumes...
{{The Dread Lord is quick to put his fishing rod away.}}
Dinosaur Bones: WHAT ARE WE WAITING FOR?
Bill Stokes: It's only for one night.
Dinosaur Bones <tossing Bill the keys to their Ford>: And I need to get a costume.
Bill Stokes: Hang on, we got to prepare for Inferno. We still don't have a challenger yet for the five minutes, but that needs to be the priority.
Dinosaur Bones: I shall dress as Roland Martin.
Bill Stokes: We also got you going after a strap in FWA, and guest spotting in J-ROK. God help us if Lord Dominicus needs a ride for his End of Days title win. With all this moonlighting, I wouldn't be surprised if FIRESIDE sent you a really nasty challenger to take you down a peg and show a little more brand loyalty. We need to focus. There isn't enough time for all of this...
Dinosaur Bones: We will make time. I will be like Santa.
Bill Stokes: That's Christmas!
Dinosaur Bones: Then I shall be the Santa of Halloween. Just as Kris Kringle goes down every chimney, circumventing the laws of time and space to deliver graft to puny mammals - The Dread Lord shall find a way to go to EVERY door in the world, and collect the candy I am DUE as a proud member of society ...while wearing a cape!
{{His mind made up, the undead dinosaur climbs into their deathmobile.}}
Bill Stokes: But...
{{Seeing adults at the nursery looking out the window and on the phone - probably with law enforcement - Stokes is quick to climb behind the wheel. The 1984 Ford speeds off...}}
Bill Stokes: We should hit the road. Big week coming up, your INFERNO debut...
Dinosaur Bones: How am I supposed to continue the 5 Minutes To Live tour without sustenance? A tiny mammal is just what I need to get through the... a bite!
{{As a toddler grabs the SNICKERS bar, Dinosaur Bones reels him in!}}
Bill Stokes: Come on Bonsey, I don't want to end up on a list like your last manager, Frank Wilkes!
Dinosaur Bones <holding up catch>: Nuts. Another Dracula.
{{The child is dressed as Dracula.}}
Bill Stokes: You get that-
Dinosaur Bones: I am no cannibal.
{{The undead lizard throws the child in the vampire cape back into the playground.}}
Bill Stokes: You know that was a costume right?
Dinosaur Bones: . . .
Bill Stokes: My species youth dress up like scary monsters for Halloween...
Dinosaur Bones: Ah yes, the birthday of Jesus.
Bill Stokes: No, that is Christmas.
Dinosaur Bones: And Halloween?
Bill Stokes: Well the kids dress up going door to door collecting candy.
Dinosaur Bones: And how do the senior members of your species defend against these pint size marauding menaces?
Bill Stokes: ...they give them candy.
{{...}}
{{...a lightbulb goes off over the inflatable zombie T-Rex costume.}}
Dinosaur Bones: ..............free candy...?
Bill Stokes: Well, for the kids.
Dinosaur Bones: As many calories as I need for the rest of my afterlife...
Bill Stokes: In costumes...
{{The Dread Lord is quick to put his fishing rod away.}}
Dinosaur Bones: WHAT ARE WE WAITING FOR?
Bill Stokes: It's only for one night.
Dinosaur Bones <tossing Bill the keys to their Ford>: And I need to get a costume.
Bill Stokes: Hang on, we got to prepare for Inferno. We still don't have a challenger yet for the five minutes, but that needs to be the priority.
Dinosaur Bones: I shall dress as Roland Martin.
Bill Stokes: We also got you going after a strap in FWA, and guest spotting in J-ROK. God help us if Lord Dominicus needs a ride for his End of Days title win. With all this moonlighting, I wouldn't be surprised if FIRESIDE sent you a really nasty challenger to take you down a peg and show a little more brand loyalty. We need to focus. There isn't enough time for all of this...
Dinosaur Bones: We will make time. I will be like Santa.
Bill Stokes: That's Christmas!
Dinosaur Bones: Then I shall be the Santa of Halloween. Just as Kris Kringle goes down every chimney, circumventing the laws of time and space to deliver graft to puny mammals - The Dread Lord shall find a way to go to EVERY door in the world, and collect the candy I am DUE as a proud member of society ...while wearing a cape!
{{His mind made up, the undead dinosaur climbs into their deathmobile.}}
Bill Stokes: But...
{{Seeing adults at the nursery looking out the window and on the phone - probably with law enforcement - Stokes is quick to climb behind the wheel. The 1984 Ford speeds off...}}
~ DINOSAUR BONES ~
~ TRICK OR TREATING AT EVERY DOOR THIS HALLOWEEN ~