Fierce! with Bella Deballe
Nov 29, 2020 20:42:44 GMT -5
Dave D-Flipz, The Nihilists, and 1 more like this
Post by Jonnie Valentine on Nov 29, 2020 20:42:44 GMT -5
You are watching PSTV, Palm Springs Television. Coming up is "That's Hollywood! with Stan Diamond" where he interviews Suzanne Somers about her heartbreak on the set of Three's Company, and how salt rooms have cured her of depression. But first, it's Fierce! with Bella Deballe.
("Strong Enough" by Cher plays as we fade on to a local television talk show set. A lower third graphic appears, saying "Fierce!"There are two stools for Bella Deballe and Sham Payne as they vamp for the camera, and a third, extra one next to them. A fake plant is to the side of them to give it that outdoorsy look)
Bella Deballe: Hello and welcome to Fierce! The third highest rated drag newscast in Palm Springs. With me as always is Sham Payne.
Sham Payne: Enchanté.
Bella Deballe: Coming up later in the hour, we show you how to store your summer wigs to make room for holiday wigs. But first we have friend of the show, "The Credible Hulk" Jonnie Valentine here to talk about his big match he has in Philly with MAJESTY.
(The rap from "Teen Witch" soundtrack plays and a humble "The Credible Hulk" Jonnie Valentine sheepishly walks out, then sits on his stool)
"The Credible Hulk" Jonnie Valentine: Hi Bella, Sham Payne. I can't believe I'm back again. Huge fan of the show, as you know.
(Sham Payne offers her hand, and Jonnie kisses it)
Sham Payne: Welcome back, fam!
Bella Deballe: Jonnie, how you been?
Jonnie Valentine: Oh you know, Bella. Hanging in there.
Sham Payne: Now how you gonna lose to a librarian?
Bella Deballe: Girl, we said we wasn't gonna ask him about that?
Jonnie Valentine: No, it's OK. I thought I had her, and Mistress Discipline was able to reverse the Picture Perfect Dropkick in a way that's never happened before. She earned my respect that night, and Misha Constantine has a big problem on his hands.
Bella Deballe: Ok then, that brings us to our weekly segment, Basic Bitch of the Month.
Sham Payne: Today's winner is MAJESTY!
Jonnie Valentine: Uh oh!
Bella Deballe: That's right. Trying to look like Lady Gaga and wound up looking like Vincent D'onofrio in The Cell.
Sham Payne: They look like Pinhead at prom.
Bella Deballe: Or Buster wearing Lucille Two's sweater.
Sham Payne: They more basic than a wine mom singing Old Town Road in her minivan.
Jonnie Valentine: Girls, girls. I like a gold old fashioned savaging as much as the next guy. But MAJESTY is a very capable wrestler. I took them on in one of the most terrifying matches of my life at that abandoned prison, and wasn't able to get the victory.
Sham Payne: That makes me sad. Does that make you sad, Bella?
Bella Deballe: Tragic.
Jonnie Valentine: Dry those eyes, ladies. You see I get a second chance in Philadelphia. A second chance to hit The Picture Perfect Dropkick and roll them up, 1, 2, 3. They say they're a god. A god would have gone over in the cage with Misha Constantine.
Sham Payne: Speaking of God, it looks like he couldn't decide what eye color to give them so he decided on just trash.
Bella Deballe: Shouldn't a god be able to pay they light bill so they don't have to talk in a "dark room" all the time.
Sham Payne: It's called (clap) auto pay, (clap) bitch!
Jonnie Valentine: This is all true. MAJESTY last time Misha Constantine stood between you and the Fireside Championship, and you couldn't fall off a cage fast enough.
(Metallic clanking in the background)
Jonnie Valentine: This time you stand between me and a shot to get my smiling face on that XHF graphic.
(Metallic clanking in the background)
Jonnie Valentine: I'm sorry, I like you Maj, maybe one day you can hit me with the hot tag. But nothing is stopping me from winning that match and representing Fireside in a shot for a XHF title match.
Bella Deballe: And who is this tall drink of water?
(Camera pans out and Lanny Poffo is standing next to Jonnie Valentine, wearing knight armor)
Jonnie Valentine: This? Oh, this is Lanny Poffo. My personal poet. Hit it, Lanny!
Lanny Poffo: On a snowy day in Philly
The City of Brotherly Love
Jonnie will beat MAJESTY
To show he's a cut above
They sit in a dark room to scare us
They cry and then they start to laugh
But if MAJESTY actually won the belt
Attendance would be cut in half
Will Jonnie win with dropkicks?
Or a specially stiff powerbomb?
I know he'll do whatever it takes
To beat Marilyn Manson's Mom
Sham Payne: (applauds) Bravo! Bravo!
Bella Deballe: Finally, some class on this show. Coming up, Izzy Uncut talks about her experiences as a cruise ship performer, and why she and Lindsey Graham didn't work out. That's next on Fierce!
("Strong Enough" by Cher swells and we go to commercial break)
("Strong Enough" by Cher plays as we fade on to a local television talk show set. A lower third graphic appears, saying "Fierce!"There are two stools for Bella Deballe and Sham Payne as they vamp for the camera, and a third, extra one next to them. A fake plant is to the side of them to give it that outdoorsy look)
Bella Deballe: Hello and welcome to Fierce! The third highest rated drag newscast in Palm Springs. With me as always is Sham Payne.
Sham Payne: Enchanté.
Bella Deballe: Coming up later in the hour, we show you how to store your summer wigs to make room for holiday wigs. But first we have friend of the show, "The Credible Hulk" Jonnie Valentine here to talk about his big match he has in Philly with MAJESTY.
(The rap from "Teen Witch" soundtrack plays and a humble "The Credible Hulk" Jonnie Valentine sheepishly walks out, then sits on his stool)
"The Credible Hulk" Jonnie Valentine: Hi Bella, Sham Payne. I can't believe I'm back again. Huge fan of the show, as you know.
(Sham Payne offers her hand, and Jonnie kisses it)
Sham Payne: Welcome back, fam!
Bella Deballe: Jonnie, how you been?
Jonnie Valentine: Oh you know, Bella. Hanging in there.
Sham Payne: Now how you gonna lose to a librarian?
Bella Deballe: Girl, we said we wasn't gonna ask him about that?
Jonnie Valentine: No, it's OK. I thought I had her, and Mistress Discipline was able to reverse the Picture Perfect Dropkick in a way that's never happened before. She earned my respect that night, and Misha Constantine has a big problem on his hands.
Bella Deballe: Ok then, that brings us to our weekly segment, Basic Bitch of the Month.
Sham Payne: Today's winner is MAJESTY!
Jonnie Valentine: Uh oh!
Bella Deballe: That's right. Trying to look like Lady Gaga and wound up looking like Vincent D'onofrio in The Cell.
Sham Payne: They look like Pinhead at prom.
Bella Deballe: Or Buster wearing Lucille Two's sweater.
Sham Payne: They more basic than a wine mom singing Old Town Road in her minivan.
Jonnie Valentine: Girls, girls. I like a gold old fashioned savaging as much as the next guy. But MAJESTY is a very capable wrestler. I took them on in one of the most terrifying matches of my life at that abandoned prison, and wasn't able to get the victory.
Sham Payne: That makes me sad. Does that make you sad, Bella?
Bella Deballe: Tragic.
Jonnie Valentine: Dry those eyes, ladies. You see I get a second chance in Philadelphia. A second chance to hit The Picture Perfect Dropkick and roll them up, 1, 2, 3. They say they're a god. A god would have gone over in the cage with Misha Constantine.
Sham Payne: Speaking of God, it looks like he couldn't decide what eye color to give them so he decided on just trash.
Bella Deballe: Shouldn't a god be able to pay they light bill so they don't have to talk in a "dark room" all the time.
Sham Payne: It's called (clap) auto pay, (clap) bitch!
Jonnie Valentine: This is all true. MAJESTY last time Misha Constantine stood between you and the Fireside Championship, and you couldn't fall off a cage fast enough.
(Metallic clanking in the background)
Jonnie Valentine: This time you stand between me and a shot to get my smiling face on that XHF graphic.
(Metallic clanking in the background)
Jonnie Valentine: I'm sorry, I like you Maj, maybe one day you can hit me with the hot tag. But nothing is stopping me from winning that match and representing Fireside in a shot for a XHF title match.
Bella Deballe: And who is this tall drink of water?
(Camera pans out and Lanny Poffo is standing next to Jonnie Valentine, wearing knight armor)
Jonnie Valentine: This? Oh, this is Lanny Poffo. My personal poet. Hit it, Lanny!
Lanny Poffo: On a snowy day in Philly
The City of Brotherly Love
Jonnie will beat MAJESTY
To show he's a cut above
They sit in a dark room to scare us
They cry and then they start to laugh
But if MAJESTY actually won the belt
Attendance would be cut in half
Will Jonnie win with dropkicks?
Or a specially stiff powerbomb?
I know he'll do whatever it takes
To beat Marilyn Manson's Mom
Sham Payne: (applauds) Bravo! Bravo!
Bella Deballe: Finally, some class on this show. Coming up, Izzy Uncut talks about her experiences as a cruise ship performer, and why she and Lindsey Graham didn't work out. That's next on Fierce!
("Strong Enough" by Cher swells and we go to commercial break)
