Post by Justin on Dec 24, 2020 2:21:12 GMT -5
“This one’s for you, Champ.”
Eric Dane’s face takes up the majority of the screen. There is no backdrop, no post-production, not even a cameraman. There is only The Only Star, up close and personal.
DANE:
“I’m not even sending this one in to the Network, kid. It’s not hard to sell out twenty percent capacity so I’m not worried about this being promotional. This is just a message from me to you. Heartfelt. Personal. You understand, or, you will.”
Eric takes a deep breath, waiting for the right moment to start.
DANE:
“I want you to understand that through all the bullshit, all the big words and hype, all the my dick’s bigger than your dick pontification, I really have been impressed with you over the past few months. You’ve been an exemplary champion, traveling from promotion to promotion and taking on all comers…”
“That shit takes moxy.”
“It takes balls.”
“So my hat’s off to ya, kid. You’ve done what you didn’t have to do and what nobody’s had the sack to do before you by hitting the road and taking on the best of the best at every turn. That’s what being a champion is all about, kid, don’t ever let anybody take that away from you. Hell, you could never have a run like this again and your legacy is cemented in the annals of Network lore because you did the one fundamental thing night in and night out that most wrestlers your age take for granted.”
“You made the most out of your minutes.”
“And for that, I congratulate you.”
This is where Eric would have given a respectful if brief clap had he the forethought to set the phone on its stand and film like he had some sense. Whatever, this isn’t about production value, it’s about so much more. It’s personal.
DANE:
“You remind me a lot of me, kid.”
“Twenty, twenty-five years ago I was your age. Maybe a cunthair older. But I was young, and I was brash, all you had to do was ask and I was happy to tell anybody with ears that I was the hottest shit since nuclear fusion. As far as I was concerned I was the best wrestler in the world and by hook or by crook I was bound and fucking determined to prove it.”
“So I went everywhere.”
“And I do mean everywhere.”
“I went to Portland, made my bones by winning the top title out there and challenging the Alliance World Champion to a Loser Leaves Town match. Imagine the shit I took from the match-makers for that one, right? I went to North Carolina and I won the top title there, too. I challenged the World Champion and I beat him. That was 1999, kid. I was under thirty, not quite as young as you are now, but the business was different back then. I think we can all agree on that.”
“I defended that title internationally. That is to say, I went to Canada and I lost it. Couldn’t have lost it to a bigger douchebag, either, but that’s another story for another day. Losing the belt only relit the fire under my ass.”
“I went on the road. Europe. Japan. Mexico. I won another Alliance World Title. I went to a rival Alliance and I won four more. And I traveled. I defended that thing sometimes twice per week, sometimes more. I spent my entire thirties globetrotting and wrestling in Main Events in front of packed houses with big time Championship Gold on the line.”
Eric smiles, reminiscing for a moment.
DANE:
“Now, I say all of that not to brag, and certainly not to imply that anything I did all those years ago has any bearing on today. I’m telling you all this, Dylan, because I want you to believe me when I tell you that I have the utmost respect for you. As a man. As a wrestler. As a Champion of champions. See, I’m more than well versed in what it’s like to lord a title belt over an organization such as the Network. I know the strain it puts on body and mind. I know what it’s like to get in a jet every single night and fly to the next territory so you can wake up and do it all over again.”
“It takes a special kind of psycho to do that, Dylan.”
“However.”
“I know what burnout looks like, too. I know what it looks like when a man has been going so hard for so long that he starts cutting corners, taking things lightly, and making stupid decisions. I know it because it’s happened to me more times than I can count, and likely more times than you’ll ever even get the opportunity to overcome. And that’s fine, it’s the life I chose to live, no regrets.”
“But make no mistake, Dylan.”
“While I may be empathetic to your situation, I guarantee you I won’t be cutting you any slack. I’ve got my bootheel pressed so deeply into your throat that you’re floundering for oxygen, hoping against hope that I’ll let you catch a breather.”
Eric shakes his head back and forth.
DANE:
“Spoiler: I will not. I’ll scorch the fucking earth to take that X*Crown from you come New Year’s Eve. I’ll burn the arena down around us and I’ll set the fucking ring on fire it if that’s what it takes to put you down for three seconds, Dylan. Whether you believe it or not regaining relevance just so happens to be the most important thing to me anymore.”
“It’s the only thing that matters.”
“I’ll bring my insurance policies.”
“I will do everything in my power to put an end to your historic reign, Dylan.”
“If you’ve got anywhere near as much respect for me as I have for you…”
Another pause.
DANE:
“You’d better do more.”
Eric Dane’s face takes up the majority of the screen. There is no backdrop, no post-production, not even a cameraman. There is only The Only Star, up close and personal.
DANE:
“I’m not even sending this one in to the Network, kid. It’s not hard to sell out twenty percent capacity so I’m not worried about this being promotional. This is just a message from me to you. Heartfelt. Personal. You understand, or, you will.”
Eric takes a deep breath, waiting for the right moment to start.
DANE:
“I want you to understand that through all the bullshit, all the big words and hype, all the my dick’s bigger than your dick pontification, I really have been impressed with you over the past few months. You’ve been an exemplary champion, traveling from promotion to promotion and taking on all comers…”
“That shit takes moxy.”
“It takes balls.”
“So my hat’s off to ya, kid. You’ve done what you didn’t have to do and what nobody’s had the sack to do before you by hitting the road and taking on the best of the best at every turn. That’s what being a champion is all about, kid, don’t ever let anybody take that away from you. Hell, you could never have a run like this again and your legacy is cemented in the annals of Network lore because you did the one fundamental thing night in and night out that most wrestlers your age take for granted.”
“You made the most out of your minutes.”
“And for that, I congratulate you.”
This is where Eric would have given a respectful if brief clap had he the forethought to set the phone on its stand and film like he had some sense. Whatever, this isn’t about production value, it’s about so much more. It’s personal.
DANE:
“You remind me a lot of me, kid.”
“Twenty, twenty-five years ago I was your age. Maybe a cunthair older. But I was young, and I was brash, all you had to do was ask and I was happy to tell anybody with ears that I was the hottest shit since nuclear fusion. As far as I was concerned I was the best wrestler in the world and by hook or by crook I was bound and fucking determined to prove it.”
“So I went everywhere.”
“And I do mean everywhere.”
“I went to Portland, made my bones by winning the top title out there and challenging the Alliance World Champion to a Loser Leaves Town match. Imagine the shit I took from the match-makers for that one, right? I went to North Carolina and I won the top title there, too. I challenged the World Champion and I beat him. That was 1999, kid. I was under thirty, not quite as young as you are now, but the business was different back then. I think we can all agree on that.”
“I defended that title internationally. That is to say, I went to Canada and I lost it. Couldn’t have lost it to a bigger douchebag, either, but that’s another story for another day. Losing the belt only relit the fire under my ass.”
“I went on the road. Europe. Japan. Mexico. I won another Alliance World Title. I went to a rival Alliance and I won four more. And I traveled. I defended that thing sometimes twice per week, sometimes more. I spent my entire thirties globetrotting and wrestling in Main Events in front of packed houses with big time Championship Gold on the line.”
Eric smiles, reminiscing for a moment.
DANE:
“Now, I say all of that not to brag, and certainly not to imply that anything I did all those years ago has any bearing on today. I’m telling you all this, Dylan, because I want you to believe me when I tell you that I have the utmost respect for you. As a man. As a wrestler. As a Champion of champions. See, I’m more than well versed in what it’s like to lord a title belt over an organization such as the Network. I know the strain it puts on body and mind. I know what it’s like to get in a jet every single night and fly to the next territory so you can wake up and do it all over again.”
“It takes a special kind of psycho to do that, Dylan.”
“However.”
“I know what burnout looks like, too. I know what it looks like when a man has been going so hard for so long that he starts cutting corners, taking things lightly, and making stupid decisions. I know it because it’s happened to me more times than I can count, and likely more times than you’ll ever even get the opportunity to overcome. And that’s fine, it’s the life I chose to live, no regrets.”
“But make no mistake, Dylan.”
“While I may be empathetic to your situation, I guarantee you I won’t be cutting you any slack. I’ve got my bootheel pressed so deeply into your throat that you’re floundering for oxygen, hoping against hope that I’ll let you catch a breather.”
Eric shakes his head back and forth.
DANE:
“Spoiler: I will not. I’ll scorch the fucking earth to take that X*Crown from you come New Year’s Eve. I’ll burn the arena down around us and I’ll set the fucking ring on fire it if that’s what it takes to put you down for three seconds, Dylan. Whether you believe it or not regaining relevance just so happens to be the most important thing to me anymore.”
“It’s the only thing that matters.”
“I’ll bring my insurance policies.”
“I will do everything in my power to put an end to your historic reign, Dylan.”
“If you’ve got anywhere near as much respect for me as I have for you…”
Another pause.
DANE:
“You’d better do more.”
