Battleground #38 : Full Circle (Show)

[SWAT Team]

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(Jonnie Valentine and Paul Soutter are riding in the back of a horse carriage, riding through Cleveland's Berea)

Jonnie Valentine: This is lovely.

Paul Soutter: This is stupid.

Jonnie Valentine: What? I'm trying to build teamwork and bond as tag team partners. We're wrestling Eric Dane and Eddie D, presumably because they have the same initials. They're no slouches. Well, actually Eddie is. They both are, come to think of it. But we can't be the Can-Am Connection. We have to be Strike Force.

Paul Soutter: How is this building teamwork?

Jonnie Valentine: I called ahead and got them to give us the plow horse for the extra partner, who's a big tub of love. We're taking in the sights of Cleveland. (points) Why that's the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame!

Paul Soutter: Hrrmph.

Jonnie Valentine: There's the Cleveland Museum of Art.

Paul Soutter: (folds his arms) Don't care.

Jonnie Valentine: Look there's the reason, Eddie D always loses!

Paul Soutter: That's a hot dog cart. (realizes) Oh.

Jonnie Valentine: Come on. I don't need the Grump of Gund Arena, I need the Mad Dog of Melbourne, we need to finally rid SWAT of Eddie D and Canada's Eddie D. You with me?

Paul Soutter: Yeah.

Jonnie Valentine: What's that?

Paul Soutter: (little louder) Yeah.

Jonnie Valentine: I can't hear you.

Paul Soutter: That's as loud as I'm saying it.

Jonnie Valentine: That's fine. That was pretty loud.

Paul Soutter: I’m loud and proud. And you do know Dane is out of the match. Board sent him packing I heard.

Jonnie Valentine: Board? Im the Commiss! You would think I heard about this?

Paul Soutter: I thought you did it. You know, take one out of our ‘opponents’ in the upcoming match.

Jonnie Valentine: Me? No, that’s WAY above my paygrade.

Paul Soutter: You should be able to hire and fire.

Jonnie Valentine: I don’t want to have that much responsibility.

Paul Soutter: Oh well, at least it’s us two against that big turkey Eddie.

Jonnie Valentine: That doesn’t seem fair to me. Let’s make it Eddie can add a new partner. Anyone he likes, we can take ‘em.

Paul Soutter: (ponders) Sure. Why not. I knew that was a set up in the parking lot with Frosty. You can’t trust them bandits. Him least of all.

Jonnie Valentine: I know, but this damn troll has been riding me since I got the job of Commiss, and I thought, the reward was worth the risk.

Paul Soutter: He is infatuated with that belt, so he coulda stooged ‘em out, the snow flake.

(There is a loud fart. Really loud and really long.)

Jonnie Valentine: (to the horse) RUSTY! (Seinfeld reference)

Paul Soutter: That was me. Sorry.

Jonnie Valentine: Wow. What do you eat there down under.

Paul Soutter: Beer. And then more beer.

Jonnie Valentine: Save one of them for the match (waves at his face) Eddie doesn’t stand a chance.

[Fade.]

[thejerseydevildiva]

Act 1: Best of the Best

"I will always be the best. You can try to brin' me down, but I will always be better than you. Stand against me and you will fall!"

The scene opens on the beautiful city of Cleveland Ohio. The city was full of life even as late as it was. The camera moves over the city streets and we soon see a black limo moving through the streets and soon stops in front of what looks like an old warehouse. Two figures dressed in dark suits walk to the car and one opens the back door and out steps Joanne. The other man smiles and extends a hand to her.

Man: Welcome Prince Canelli. It's such and honor to have you here in our city.

Joanne: Thank you Dean. My sire spoke highly of you. I'm sorry I didn't call you sooner and let you know that I was comin'...

Dean: Prince Canelli your sire and I go way back. He called ahead for you. Lets head inside. My people are waiting.

Joanne nods as they head inside. The building was done with deep purples and blacks inside. The stairs were lined with a deep purple runner and brass railings. The sound of music drifted from the upper levels, and she started to see young women dressed in hardly anything. She knew what they were just like her. They all were. They all hiss as she passed but she keeps her self calm and collected as they enter the main sanctuary of the place, where others have gathered.

Dean: Welcome to our home Prince Canelli.

Joanne: Thank you. I have to say its... It's cute...

A woman dressed in a tight leather dress moves beside Dean and hisses.

Woman: How dare you come into our city and call us cute?!

Joanne: I meant nothin' by it... But tell why are you dressed like that?

The woman laughs.

Woman: Because I am beautiful, I am seductive! I am death!

Joanne laughs.

Joanne: Sure you are honey. I can read your mind and you are a secretary. Use that to your advantage. Fuck your boss, get a raise, then black mail him. Use your powers... Have fun with it. You don't need to dress like you just walked out of a BDSM video. Use what you got. I mean look at me... I dress in a suit. When people look at me they think I'm strong, independent, got my shit together. They buy me drinks, and then when they let their guard down, I strike! Hell I know a soccer mom that when she took her kid to practice she would hit on the single dads there. Lure them away for like 5, 10 minutes, fuck them and feed all before practice was over. The guy would wake up, not remember anythin' and go on with his day.

Woman: Really?

Joanne: Hell yeah. Like I said use what you got. Don't dress like that... Hell do what you want to do. Don't be another Twilight wannabe. We don't fuckin' sparkle.

Dean: Where did you learn that from? We dress to impress!

Joanne: Who? This is Cleveland! What is there to do here? You're in Ohio! I mean it's not like you're in New York, LA or Miami... My sire told me not to dress like that. It works for some but not for everybody. Now if you want to do business we can do business. Lets sit down and have a chat.

Dean: Of course Prince Canelli Come, we'll speak in my office.

Joanne nods as they head into another room as the scene fades to black.

"When I can work with others it feels great. Maybe that's why I work so well with my brothers in the KGB. We all have an understandin', and all know what we want in our lives. Titles have come and gone, but one day we will hold them all once again. Give us time... And it will be ours..."

The scene reopens on Downtown of Cleveland. The camera moves over the city and soon comes to a stop on the Hyatt Regency of  Cleveland at The Arcade. Most of the windows were already darkened for the night, but one still burned bright. The camera moves to the interior of the suite where we see the dimly lit rooms and a shadow moves across the room. A light turns on and we see Joanne removing the suit jacket revealing the two desert eagles glistening in the light sitting in their holsters. She removes the holsters and set them down with the jacket. She sighs removing the tie, and tosses it over a chair. She walks to the window that over looked the city and she leans against it feeling the coolness o the glass against her skin.

Joanne: Blaze Freya... You've been silent since we found out about our match! Are you scared about facin' me, or are you just waitin' and biddin' your time? I mean it doesn't matter to me by any means. I know how this match is goin' to end anyway and I'm not to worried about it either way. Remind me what have you done since you've been in SWAT? Anythin' I should really look into? Or are you just another little wannabe that likes to pretend they are big and bad? I guess I'll have to wait and see won't I? I don't really feel like wastin' a whole lot of time on someone that I don't even know will be worth it or not.

She laughs as she turns from the window and sits on the black leather couch, and puts her feet up on the table.

Joanne: I mean I've faced off against some big names and that's why this is kind of throwin' me off of my game. I don't even remember if I have ever faced you or not there Blaze... I might have and even if I did you think I would have remembered right? But then again more than likely not! I plan on winnin' this match and showin' the rest of the locker room why I am the best of the best. You're not goin' to stand to me let alone pull off a win without trouble. I will not stop, I will not back down from what is comin' but if I were you I would turn and walk away before you get hurt Blaze... Because I will not hold back, nor will I lay down for you. I've worked hard to get where I am and I don' plan on losin' that easily. We are the Mafioso and we get paid to kick your ass! See you soon and good luck, you're goin' to need it.

Her phone rings and she sighs. She soon picks up and lays back on the couch as the scene fades to black.

[SWAT Team]

Jeremy Tucker : Here’s a match I personally have been looking forward to since the card was first announced.

Andrew Fulton : See, you look forward to the barely clothed women committed to unnecessary roughness just as much as I do…

Jeremy Tucker : No my mind’s not in the gutter, I think that Blaze Freya continuing her campaign against all things KGB is a compelling backdrop to this encounter…

Andrew Fulton : Blah, blah, blah… I can't wait to see these ladies duke it out. Blaze had better be prepared to bring it against The Don.

The house lights go down, as a spotlight goes over the crowd. As the spotlight comes to a stop at the back of the entrance way, as "Courtesy Call" by Thousand Foot Krutch begins to play. A picture of the Italian Flag appears on the screen with the letters F.B.I over the flag, with the words "FULL BLOODED ITALIAN" is written underneath. It soon changes to scenes of mob hits, newspaper clippings from just recent to the late 1900's, but soon changes once again, to shots of the Mafioso, sitting in a large office, and in limos, and in arena's from times since past.

Frank Salazar: The following contest is scheduled for ONE fall! Introducing first, hailing from The Jersey Shore, standing in at 5'11", weighing 135 pounds... "THE DON" JOOOOOOOAAAAAANNNNNNNEEEEEEEE CAAAAAANELLLLIIIIIIIIII!!!

The spotlight focuses on four figures figures standing at the back of the ramp. This is Joanne and her bodyguards. They make their way down the ramp with Joanne in the middle with Reno and Rude on either side, and Scarpaci following behind, talking amongst themselves ignoring the crowd around them. When they reach the ring, Reno holds open the ropes for her, as she slips inside, only to follow behind and stand in the middle of the ring, around her. She removes her jacket, and hands it to one of the guys, before they head out of the ring.

Jeremy Tucker : The Don. How much sway in the KGB does she have? It feels as though Armand and she are running things more as a team than Canelli returning and falling in line with the rest.

Andrew Fulton : Armand and Canelli are probably hatching up plans together, but I think AVK is still the head honcho. Armand’s in charge, Canelli knows where the bodies are buried, Frosty freezes other people’s assets, Eddie throws his weight around, The Colossus is colossal, James Fierce has gotten tame and The Tuck… well frankly who gives a fuck….

Jeremy Tucker : At the end of the day, as a movement, the KGB seems to have masterminded wins and ambushes when their deadly enemy The Society of The New Breed have a Commissioner in the office. Valentine still can’t seem to thwart the KGB’s apparent dominance.

Andrew Fulton : Well maybe we’ll see some dominance restored if Blaze gets the win here and Valentine and Suit kick Eddie’s arse? It’s a big ask though. Here comes Blaze now…

The arena darkens and fans erupt into loud cheers as “Collapsing” by Demon Hunter blasts through the speakers. Red, pink and purple lights flicker on and off in rapid succession creating a beautiful strobe effect over the stage as none other than The Blackpool Bombshell herself, Blaze Freya comes out from behind the curtain, walking backwards onto the stage with a charismatic strut. Her black hood covers her lowered head until she spins around triggering the lights to brighten to reveal her gorgeous face as she removes the hood, head-banging with the fans a bit. She nods in approval hearing the roar of the crowd, feeding off of their excitement then rolls her shoulders a few times, sprinting down the ramp and sliding into the center of the ring, humping it briefly. Canelli backs off to one corner, conceding centre stage to Blaze. Blaze then leans back on her knees running her fingers through her long black hair, flirtatiously winking at the nearest camera before standing up to her feet and walking back to her corner staring down her opponent with a determined look on her face.

Frank Salazar: And to contest this Amazon encounter, in the red corner, hailing from Blackpool England, coming in at 5’6 & 125 lbs …. THE BLACKPOOL BOMBSHELL! BLAZE FREYA!!!!

Jeremy Tucker : Here we go folks, as the bell is rung for this one ... Canelli and Blaze waste no time dancing around and come straight together an exchange of punches ... There’s a short pause as the referee shouts at the pair about the closed fists and the pair go straight into a collar and elbow tie up… Blaze twists out of the tie-up with Canelli’s hand and applies a wrist lock ... Canelli edges towards the ropes but Blaze applies the pressure and Canelli drops to one knee ... Canelli tries again and gets to the ropes this time ... Blaze drops the hold and hits Canelli with a knife edge chop …. Canelli staggers a pace backwards ... Blaze grabs Canelli, spins her around and hits an INVERTED FRANKENSTEINER!!! …. Blaze covers ...

… … …1

… … …2

Kick out by Canelli!

Andrew Fulton : Blaze grabs an arm while Canelli is still down and applies a wristlock …. Canelli is suffering … Canelli shows great agility there as she manages to twist and turn her way out from under Blaze to get back to her feet... Canelli tugs a fist full of hair to distract Blaze and escapes the wristlock… Blaze shouts at the unsighted referee and gestures that her hair was pulled to get out of the hold... Canelli fanes innocence and winks at Blaze to antagonise her as the two women pace around each other...

Jeremy Tucker : Collar and elbow tie up.... Blaze breaks from the clinch and drags Canelli down to the mat into an arm bar… Canelli looks to have found a way out, but Blaze adjusts the hold and Blaze has Canelli face down on the mat in a wristlock now….

Andrew Fulton : More mat wrestling than I expected… There’s still scope for scratching and tit grabs later I guess… This technical wrestling is all well and good, but you got to have “something for the dads” too…

Jeremy Tucker : Please Andrew, this is entertainment enough for anyone… look at the effort and pain etched on their faces… Canelli looks like she’s powering her way out of the hold ... Blaze feels that she’s losing her grip and switches to a side headlock … Canelli lets out a groan of discomfort but has got back to one knee and forced Blaze back up to her feet… Canelli walks Blaze into the ropes and Blaze drops the headlock ... The referee calls for a clean break … And gets one… Blaze and Canelli circle each other …. Canelli shakes out the pain in her wrist and comes straight back at Blaze … Collar and elbow tie up.... And Canelli puts Blaze in a wristlock of her own … Blaze curses out loud...

Andrew Fulton : Now it’s hotting-up… talking dirty… more please…

Jeremy Tucker : Blaze winces and shouts an insult at Canelli …Canelli is about to say something back but Blaze manages to free herself with a nice forward roll… Blaze has managed keep Canelli’s arm, ended up behind her with a hammer lock applied… Canelli tries to grab at Blaze’s head.... Blaze applies more pressure on the arm and Canelli winces… Canelli reaches down for a leg, but Blaze blocks the attempt... Canelli tries to pace her way out of the hold… They circle the ring with Canelli still suffering in the hammer lock… Blaze trips Canelli and has the hammer lock applied on the mat now… Canelli is face down and grimacing… Blaze lifts herself up in a handstand and brings her knee down hard on Canelli’s bent arm … Blaze tells the referee to ask Canelli if she quits… Canelli twists counter-clockwise out from underneath Blaze and wrenches herself free … Blaze is frustrated at letting her get loose.... Canelli shakes the pain out of her arm and comes angrily back at Blaze and they lock up again… Canelli slips Blaze into a side headlock… Canelli’s got it locked in well ....Blaze drops to one knee as the pressure comes on… Blaze begins to lift Canelli off her feet … Side suplex! …Canelli gets back to her feet… Blaze hits her with a ferocious chop and Canelli is back down again… Canelli rolls to the outside and tries to walk off the pain to a huge boo from the crowd…

Andrew Fulton : Wise change of pace from Canelli… Taking a few moments respite to break up Blaze’s momentum… Blaze waits for the referee to turn around to begin counting out Canelli … … 1 … … 2 … Blaze darts around the referee, reaches over the second rope and grabs two fistfuls of Canelli’s hair… the referee is protesting, but I and the fans are loving this… Blaze cutting Canelli’s breather short and dragging her back into the ring… Blaze gets her back in the ring and sends Canelli into the ropes with an Irish Whip… Blaze handsprings off the ropes to meet Canelli with a Pele Kick!!! … and covers…

… … …1

… … …2

Kick out by Canelli!

As the pair get back to their feet Canelli rakes at Blaze’s eyes, but in desperation Blaze throws out an arm and slaps Canelli into a side headlock ... blinking and smarting from the rake Blaze manoeuvres Canelli’s head away from the referee and punches her hard in the face… Canelli pops clean out of the headlock and hits the mat hard… Canelli rubs her jaw as our referee Miriam Douglass reprimands Blaze… Blaze not hiding her hate for the KGB here points out the eye raking that the ref need to watch out for… Canelli gets up and runs at Blaze … Blaze throws Canelli over with a hip toss … Canelli gets up quickly and comes again … Blaze grabs her by the head and snap mares her down … Blaze tries to dive and drive her knees into her back, but Canelli must have sensed something was coming and rolls to one side and Blaze hits nothing but air… Canelli is back up and comes back again … running off the ropes this time… Blaze throws down her head and sends Canelli skyward… high elevation… and Canelli crashes down from that back body drop!!! …Canelli holds her lower back, but she gets up raging and stubbornly determined not to be out done ... This time Canelli runs at her opponent, but stops, miss-foots Blaze and stuns her with a slap across the face and a standing dropkick!! … Blaze stumbles back hard into the nearest turnbuckles … Canelli drags her out of the corner by her hair and kicks Blaze in the guts… whilst Blaze is doubled over, Canelli hits the ropes and… MOB HIT!!! (Running hard kick to the side of the head)

Jeremy Tucker : And the cover

… … …1

… … …2

KICK OUT!

Canelli wastes no time dragging Blaze up and sends her into the ropes again ... Blaze comes back ... met with a boot to the gut and Canelli underhooks her arms... lifts Blaze up and… Gut Buster!!!

Andrew Fulton : The way she drops backwards to spike Blaze in the guts with her knees… It’s the poetry of pain folks… Beautiful stuff… It’s why I keep coming back here…

Jeremy Tucker : Canelli drags Blaze up and hits a snap DDT... and covers

… … …1

… … …2

ROPE BREAK!

Blaze has the presence of mind to put her leg out on the bottom rope ... Canelli drags Blaze up sends her into the ropes… they meet in the centre of the ring?! …Double clothesline!!! ...Both women hit the canvas hard and are barely moving… ouch! …

Andrew Fulton : All credit to them both in there… I would say that Blaze won the opening sparing, but if she hadn’t killed that momentum with that clothesline just now, I think Canelli would be wrapping things up about now…

Jeremy Tucker : Canelli pulls up Blaze, applying a half-Nelson that she transitions into a facebuster!

Andrew Fulton : Easy girls! Don’t bust those gorgeous faces open now…

Jeremy Tucker : Canelli gets up and goes for The Camel Clutch, but Blaze counters and frees herself before it’s locked in… Blaze grabs Canelli, twists her arm, throws up her boot to Canelli’s face and… EAT DEFEAT!!!!(Short arm inverted facebuster) She covers, we could have the pinfall right here!

… … …1

… … …2

… … ..KICK OUT!!!! Unbelievable?!

Andrew Fulton : Wow. Blaze thinks it’s unbelievable too, Blaze hooks both legs this time and covers Canelli with extra purpose…

… … …1

… … …2

… … KICK OUT!!!!

Jeremy Tucker : Blaze drags Canelli up and sends her into the ropes… Blaze throws out an arm, but Canelli ducks it and hits the other ropes… Blaze turns to meet her, but Canelli baseball slides between her legs and pops up behind her… Canelli spins Blaze around and slaps her face… Blaze is stunned as Canelli grabs her by the hair and an arm whips her into the turnbuckles…

Andrew Fulton : Blaze doesn’t even have time to adjust to accept the buckles with her back and hits the top buckle boobs first… She staggers back towards the middle of the ring.. Canelli spins her around… ROLL THE DICE!!! (MVP’s Playmaker – knee fulcrum neck breaker) … and she covers… this should be it.

… … …1

… … …2

… … KICK OUT!!!!

Jeremy Tucker : These two are giving their all and after a bout like this I can’t believe they can have much more to give… Canelli can’t believe that didn’t finish it…

Andrew Fulton : Blaze is struggling over in one corner to get herself back to her feet clutching her neck… As Canelli argues with the referee over the count and catches her own breath… Canelli rises to her feet and heads over to a hunched Blaze in the corner… Blaze comes erupting out of the corner with the TORN!!!... but no, Canelli leapfrogged over her and Blaze has laid out referee Miriam Douglas with that deadly Spear of hers!!! … This is hilarious…

Jeremy Tucker : This is awful; …look at poor Miriam laid out there and look at the evil look on the face on The Jersey Devil Diva… She sees this as an opportunity to put this match to bed… Canelli shouts out something in Italian to Reno as Blaze tries to wake Miriam and gets her bearings…

Andrew Fulton : Reno Renard, BJ Rude Thompson and Scarpaci Canelli are entering the ring from three different sides and Blaze is only now awake to the danger… but the crowd booing their entry, and the crowd chanting her name seems to give Blaze fresh energy… Blaze grabs Reno by the wrist as he tries to grab for her and …EAT DEFEAT!!! …Reno felt all of that impact and bounces out of the ring and falls hard to the arena floor… Rude makes a grab for Blaze as she gets up but she punches him in the nuts… Rude is doubled up in pain… Blaze hits the ropes and SPRINGBOARD CUTTER on Rude!!!

Jeremy Tucker : Rude rolls to the outside clutching his head and abdomen… Scarpaci throws Joanne Canelli a set of brass knuckle dusters as Blaze gets up… Blaze runs at Scarpaci, but he side steps her and slaps her in a full-nelson… Blaze is wide open for that Kiss the Rings dirty finish of hers…

Andrew Fulton : You know that’s pretty rich… have you seen the non-legal men that Blaze has been opening up on? …You can’t just beat down valets, managers and security details like this and then judge others about not obeying the rules…

Jeremy Tucker : Canelli is smiling ear to ear as she winds back and delivers the KISS THE RINGS!!! But no, Blaze back heeled Scarpaci in the shins and he dropped her at the last moment… Scarpaci just took a brutal shot to the chin and fell into the ring ropes and falls clumsily and half unconscious to ringside…

Andrew Fulton : It’s just not easy to get good help these days… Canelli is looking out at her security team in different states of consciousness and injury… Canelli screams in frustration as she stares at her brass knucks and down at Blaze Freya… Canelli tells the fans to shut up with their booing… Blaze is still holding her right shoulder painfully after the full nelson she was hoisted up in… Canelli grabs Blaze by the hair, pulls back for a big right hand and… the referee grabs Canelli by the arm before she can swing it!!!…

Jeremy Tucker : Miriam Douglas is back on her feet and demanding that Canelli hand over the knuckles… as Canelli lets go of Blaze’s hair and tries to come up with some excuse for what was about to happen… The referee is still dazed but she’s up and officiating again…

Andrew Fulton : Nice to see your girlfriend is back up…

Jeremy Tucker : We dated once in the 90’s OK… just drop it… I just don’t like to see a fellow colleague hurt like that is all…

Andrew Fulton : Touchy… Canelli has handed over the knucks reluctantly and turns on Blaze who is using the ropes to get up and favouring her right arm still… Canelli opens up with three big right hands and Blaze is leaning heavily on the ropes to stay upright… Canelli hits Blaze with a big punch to the gut and Blaze keels over, stumbling facedown into the centre of the ring clutching her stomach…

Jeremy Tucker : Canelli stands over Blaze, a foot either side of her back and laughs at the crowd’s reaction… They all know that The Camel Clutch will probably be enough to finish this match off after a worthy attempt by Blaze to secure the win here…

Andrew Fulton : Canelli reaches down for Blaze’s head but Blaze has been playing possum… Blaze shuffles back between Canelli’s legs and pops back to her feet behind Canelli and slaps her in THE BLACKPOOL BLACKOUT!!!!! (Rear naked choke style sleeper hold)

Jeremy Tucker : Canelli is staggering around, but Blaze locks in tight and Canelli drops to her knees… Canelli waves up the ramp with some odd hands crossed hand gesture as she slumps down under the strain and looks to be fading fast…

Andrew Fulton : I think I know what that hand gesture was… The producer is blathering in my ear that Eddie D is pushing security around in the backstage trying to get out on the ramp…

Jeremy Tucker : Canelli looks to be out cold. The referee steps in and lifts Canelli’s hand.

…...once

Eddie barrels through a security guard and leaves him gasping for air on the top of the ramp way. The crowd boo at his arrival as he turns towards the ring.

The hand drops……...twice

Eddie runs down the ramp headed for the ring, but he’s never going to make it in time...

The hand drops …... NO!!!! Blaze released the hold and …

TORN (Gore) to Eddie as he went to enter the ring!

Blaze turns around and Canelli rolls her up in a small package.

… … …1

… … …2

… … … ..3!!!!!

The referee calls for the bell…

Frank Salazar : And your winner …. JOANNE CANELLI!!!

[The KGB theme hits and the ref raises the hand of Canelli in victory. Edddie looks up selling the Torn and smiles as Joanne celebrates in the ring.]

[thecomedian]

<"Hate or Glory" by Gesaffelstein kicks in over the pa system and "The Golden God" Rally Jackson comes out through the curtain down the entranceway.>

Jeremy Tucker:  This is interesting.  Rally Jackson scheduled to compete a little later tonight.  Is the title match going to take place now?

Andrew Fulton:  No genius, he's clearly going to cut a promo.

Jeremy Tucker:  Highly out of the ordinary, usually when we ask Rally to do an in ring promo he asks for more money.  

Andrew Fulton:  Well no, he just does that money thing with his fingers.

<Rally gets helped into the ring by the ring attendants. They try to lift him over the ropes, but can't so they push him through.>

Rally Jackson:  I've done a lot of self reflecting lately. I've thought a lot about myself and about everything that is going on in this world.  Everyone is so divided.  And I'm sick of it.

::the crowd is hanging on Rally's every word::

I mean I look around at SWAT.  I see this roster full of talented wrestlers.

::crowd starting to cheer; he has them now::

These talented guys who could perhaps unite the country.  

::crowd erupts now::

Jeremy Tucker:  Rally is saying what needs to be said.  Roster full of talent to bring us all together.

Rally Jackson:  I see all these hard working guys.  All these role models and....

::the crowd is deafening now::

And....

::still cheering::

And....

::a chant of "Rally" begins to start::

AND I AM DISGUSTED!!!!

Andrew Fulton:  I knew he was going to do that!!  Swerve!

Rally Jackson:  I see this roster full of talented wrestlers and they are supposed to be role models.  But I don't see it!!  All I see is a bunch of lesser men who deserve to be CANCELLED!!

::the crowd turns on Rally::

Yeah, that's right I said it.  The pro wrestling industry needs to conform like the rest of society.  Mr. Potato Head wasn't safe, Pepe Lepew not safe.  None of them should be safe either!!

::BOOOOO::

The SWAT roster offends me, the SWAT roster triggers me, and the SWAT roster doesn't allow me to have my safe space.

::crowd starts chanting "go to your safe space then"::

I would if they let me have one!  I am being serious, though.  These wrestlers all need to be cancelled and I'll be the one to do it.  Did you know..... DID YOU KNOW that there's a wrestler back there that bring prostitutes to his dressing room?

Jeremy Tucker:  He's talking about himself.

Andrew Fulton: Shush.

Rally Jackson:  Did you know there is a wrestler back there that pulls ribs on everyone else?

Jeremy Tucker:  Still him.

Rally Jackson:  I already ran the first guy out that triggered me.  El Combatiente and I had two classics.  Great guy, right?

RIGHT???

Wrong.  All Combatiente was was a negative stereotype of luchadores.  He perpetuated hatred toward the luchadore community.

And on top of that, he had someone speaking for him.  THE MAN.  El Combatiente, little offensive luchadoray wasn't allowed to speak for himself.  I am so triggered.

::crowd is outright booing him now::

Jeremy Tucker:  Is he talking about his translator?

Rally Jackson:  Combatiente wasn't the only guy that triggered me so much I had to cancel him.  Insert Radu Martel.  Radu is a guy that frequently competed against women.

No problem, right?  I mean it's 2021.  Nope.  He wasn't using the correct gender pronouns.  He not only competed against women, but he competed without identifying as she/her.  Big no no.

Before anyone asks about the match I had with the women's wrestler, it was a special case because I self identified for that night and then changed my mind the next day.

Radu would be wise to update his social media profiles if he ever wants to compete against women again.  Until then he is cancelled.

::more jeers::

Andrew Fulton:  This is incredible!  Rally has just anointed himself a warrior for social justice!

Rally Jackson:  Enter Psychotic Goth.

Goth you have to be cancelled.

Your name alone make me want to crawl into my safe space and paint.

Your name implies all gothic people are psychopaths.  You are generalizing a sub group of people and for that reason you don't deserve your job, let alone that world title.

Goth's are not psychotic you insensitive barbarian.  You have offended the gothic community and you have offended me.

Mental illness is not something one should joke about.  For that reason and that reason alone you have me so triggered right now.  I want to dedicate this match to all the psychopaths in this world that are also triggered, I want to dedicate this match to the gothic community that I welcome to my safe space anytime, and I want to dedicate this match to anyone who suffers from a mental illness.  I see you guys and I hear you.  You have a voice now and that voice is mine.

<Mic drop.>

[Jay Stevens]

Backstage, Katie Moss stands in front of a black banner featuring the SWAT logo. Still half-disheveled from the “altercation” earlier, her blazer has been destroyed and her forearm is bandaged.

Katie Moss: I am backstage now… reluctantly… with the SWAT Amazons Champion, “Kid Dynamite” Nicole Anderson.

Anderson steps into frame fully decked out in her ring gear with the Amazons Championship proudly wrapped around her waist. She pulls her hood back to reveal her face.

Nicole Anderson: Katie, first off, I’d like to apologize for my actions earlier tonight. My blood sugar was low and my property had just been stolen so I was a little on edge.

Moss: Let’s just get into it.

Anderson: Katie, Katie, I can’t have this animosity between us. You’re practically my personal interviewer, not like Warren Webster came down here tonight.

Moss [under her breath]: He didn’t want to get bitten.

Anderson: Be that as it may, I hope we can put this behind us and continue to build on our wonderful relationship. Little nips between friends is good for a strong relationship, you know.

Katie rolls her eyes and gives Nicole a nod to simply move things along.

Moss: Tonight, you are scheduled to face Isabel Rios. She earned her shot when she won the one-night tournament at “No Man’s Land.” What are your thoughts on the match tonight?

Anderson: I’m excited! This is exactly what I’ve been asking, no, begging for since day one. I beat the Industrial Woman and instead of fighting the next viable contenders, I had to beat a hooker for her night’s earnings and some rando who I didn’t even break a sweat for. Now I finally get to step in the ring with a real wrestler.

Moss: Isabel Rios has been on a tear having only just lost her first match in the Network. She is widely considered to be the top of the game, does that get in your head at all?

Anderson stares at Moss blankly for a moment, waiting for Katie to make eye contact. As soon as she does, Nicole perks up and responds.

Anderson: Look, I said she was good, but what exactly makes her the top dog? Is it the Amazons Championship belt? Nope, because that is right here around my waist. And that is where it’s going to stay.

Moss: What I mean is…

Anderson: No, I know exactly what you meant. Isabel Rios was the hottest up and coming woman in the Network. Was. And then the skies opened, the rainbows crashed into the earth with big colorful explosions, heads were cracked and blood filled the streets. And it all heralded my arrival.

Moss: You are awfully confident tonight.

Anderson: I’m confident every single night, babe. Isabel Rios is legit. Joanne Canelli looked good tonight. Good ole’ Lucky Linda seems to have shined up that horseshoe too. But I’m still the best.

Moss: But Isabel Rios…

Anderson immediately interjects.

Anderson: Rios is going to come in hot, I know it. She’s looking to prove that the loss she took isn’t enough to derail her. But trust me, she’s hanging onto that ‘L’ tightly. The harder I get pushed, the better I get. And let’s be honest, I’m pretty damn good already.

Anderson smiles and strikes a sarcastic pose with her open hands beneath her exaggerated face. She steps toward Moss with her arms outstretched, but Katie flinches. Nicole fakes a pout as security quickly steps between them to usher her out.

[Deleted]

Despite avenging the attack at the hands of KGB goon Gabriel Tuck, Pequeno Dinosaurio paces the locker room he and Union Jack shared, a scowl etched on his face.

A towel over his shoulders, the strap of his mask hangs loose and his hands find his hips as he stops a moment, “Where is she?”

Sighing, Union Jack glances over to Lil’ MC who simply shrugs and marches off for the showers. Realizing he’d have to take this on solo, he tries playing it cool. “Relax mate, we both know where she is. That Osland bloke needs more attention than most birds. No need to worry about ‘Nessa, she’ll be alright.”

“He’s my rival!” Finding himself not just jealous of Oxford Osland’s apparent monopoly on their agent’s time, but also his status as Television Champion. A position the unbelievable one gained at his expense.

“Is he though?” Unwrapping his wrist tape, Jack lays it all out. The hard truth. “You went out there in a rough way mate and got beat because of it, but we got those Slimey pricks back tonight. All Osland did that was offside was brag about it afterward like there isn’t a huge asterisk over his win. So, beyond getting a rematch…what else is there?”

Nodding, the wise nature of his friend would soon be shattered, “I mean, besides shagging the absolute ass off that Esmeralda of course! Mate, just do it…I mean her. I promise you not one man on the roster would blame you!”

Laughing now, Dinosaurio was infinitely glad to have his friend along with him for the ride. Together they’d enter the Anzac Cup, a pairing that looked odd until you saw them together. Friendship, genuine friendship was rare in this business.

Each man was at a pivotal point in their careers, looking to establish themselves and a fan base at the same time. It was tough being a rookie, but both men took it in stride. After all, they had each other.

“I won’t lie amigo, she’s on my mind a lot lately.” He hadn’t dated since Mexico, months had passed since then. It was easy for the public to forget that beneath the mask was a nineteen year old in the process of discovering what type of man he’ll be. “It’s odd, but I know she’s around. I can feel her watching me. It’s like she’s waiting for something…”

Pausing for just a second, Jack can’t help himself. “She’s waiting for you to remember you’re a horny kid and that you’re entitled to a mistake or two…you know, if it’s as good as it looks!” Jack’s enthusiasm on the subject had surpassed his own tenfold.

The door to the dressing room swung open interrupting anything else the usually crass Brit might add.

“Sorry guys, Osland has had me working overtime lately trying to secure the right projects.” She let go a sigh, Oxford Osland was a surprise signing but with her roster now at three she had the makings of a stable of wrestlers who would depend on her. It was everything she ever wanted.

Most of the time.

Lately, Osland had been monopolizing her time. His demands often outrageous or, at the very least, unrealistic. A great deal of her time and energy was now spent reeling her latest signing in. That was to say nothing of Keith Williams’ various ‘charms’.

She kept telling herself it would all be worth it when she got to handle ‘him’, Tiranosaurio!

She’d pictured it since she was a kid. She’d take over for her father and handle the final stage of the legendary luchador’s career while simultaneously guiding his son. But in doing so, she’d be a part of what could be the biggest moment in Lucha Libre. The retirement of Tiranosaurio.

Straightening herself, she takes a well earned breath. “Good match tonight guys. I mean that. You two have just as good a chance as anyone when it comes to the Anzac Cup.”

What was meant as a compliment hit the ears of Dinosaurio and left a sour note. “What do you mean by that?!” He snapped. “That your new boy Osland and his buddy Williams are going to win?! I don’t think so, me and Jack are going to win the whole thing. Just as soon as we come up with a name that isn’t offensive.” Casting a glance over at Union Jack, the man-bear just shrugs.

“I didn’t…” backpedaling slightly, she was off guard. Dinosaurio had been so easy to deal with that she assumed he was fine with the current arrangement. “…I’m sorry. I know I’ve been busy. He just has so much going on…like even right now, I’ve gotten three text messages. But I’ll always be here for you, you and Jack could win the whole thing…” Casting a judging look toward the Brit, “…it wouldn’t surprise me in the least. How about I make it up to you guys by sending Warren back here so you can officially challenge Goth for the World Championship? Put the KGB behind you, as long as Goth is champion you have a legitimate claim to a title match. As your agent, I suggest taking advantage of this unique position.”

She laughed as she added a faux deepness to her voice while finishing and letting her client take in her offer.

He nodded breaking the tension between them, but deep down something didn’t feel right. She was pushing him away from avenging his only loss in SWAT thus far. Or was she?

She could feel the sweat bead and slowly run down to the small of her back, shivers ran down her spine.

She was right, but more than that; it kept Dinosaurio away from Osland while he built his brand. Plus, having a World Championship challenger in her growing stable of clients was good for business. It was finally happening for her!

“Excellent!” She exclaimed with glee. “I’ll go get Warren.” And practically ran out the door.

As the door shuts, Union Jack turns to Dinosaurio, his face as serious as the man-bear suit could allow. “Mate, one question.” He scratched the top of his mask, “Who the fuck is Warren?”

[edwarddubin0604]

(Psychotic Goth and Vampira are outside the Gund Arena surrounded by goths as he looks into the camera a maniacal look in his eyes as his fellow goths cheer and chant his name.)

Vampira: "rally Jackson you are both a hypocrite and a pathetic piece of trash. You started a war with Psychotic Goth and he is going to finish this once and for all."

Psychotic Goth: "Rally you accuse me of marginalizing the mentally ill and the gothic culture. Yet you go on to say things that are the very thing you accuse me of doing."

(He roars in a Native American dialect as the goths roar and chant his name.)

Psychotic Goth: "It's funny because you come in like you usually do and that is pathetically overweight and out of shape. Does that not mean that you are mocking those who are obese and are struggling to lose weight. Are you not an embarrassment to those so-called marginalized people.
Do you not mock them by literally your very presence in the ring."

(Psychotic Goth bellows as his fellow goths do the same.)

Psychotic Goth: "Then you pull all of those so-called harmless pranks on everyone on the roster. You even psychologically crippled Rajiv Khan for the rest of his life by setting his hair on fire. That's a hate crime against Asian-Americans which marginalizes them but to you it's just a harmless joke. A joke that I shall help avenge when I beat you down and beat you down and beat you down until you apologize and pay the ultimate price."

(He roars again like a wild beast as does his fellow goths.)

Psychotic Goth: "You mock the greatest SWAT World Heavyweight Champion, Radu Matei, and yet he at least respected his opponents male or female SWAT roster members. He retired at the top of his game and yet you call him a coward. He stood up to you and you don't like it because he dared to wrestle women. You wrestled 'Lucky' Linda La Fey but you won't mention that will you. Why is that Rally? You too scared. I bet you are Rally. I bet you are."

(Psychotic Goth roars in a Native-American dialect.)

Psychotic Goth: "You mock the mentally ill nut you don't know what I'm truly capable of. You don't know the extremes and the lengths that I shall go. You don't know the sick and twisted things I can do to you. Do you really want me to go there Rally. Do you really want me to do things to you that you never thought I would do to you that you may wish you fled and hid from me as my gothic armies hunt you down and hold you down as I preform those horrible things."

(He laughs maniacally as they shout encouraging things.)

Psychotic Goth: "Imagine you bump up every whore during your time away from the ring and now you are desperate for money. You demand money in return for title shots. You demand money just to step into the ring. Then you shake down wrestlers for no apparent reason and get away with it because the commissioner was allied with you. How pathetic is that Rally. How pathetic is that."

(Psychotic Goth roars demonically as the goths roar.)

Psychotic Goth: "Be lucky you got this title shot Rally. Now I get to make you beg for mercy as I maul you as I unleash my tortured soul on you.
You shall bleed like a stabbed pig about to be made into a meal. I shall make you see all of your sins and your life shall flash before your eyes."

(He laughs demonically as the goths encourage him.)

Psychotic Goth: "That's right 'The Psychotic One' is going to keep his promise to do so. 'The King of the Goths' shall make sure you pay the most deadly price for those sins you accumulated over the past two years. You don't know when the time is but I shall make sure you get what is coming to you when you realize too little and too late."

(Psychotic Goth roars in a Native-American dialect.)

Psychotic Goth: "You see I am 'The Serpent of SWAT' and I shall slither and stalk you and when it's time for you to suffer from my venom. I shall make sure you suffering is quick and painful. You shall wonder why you can't die a slow death and it's because you aren't worthy of such an honor. This serpent has no compassion and shall show no mercy Rally. I show none Rally. I am one who is silent but violent. You shall see this too little too late to stop me."

(He bellows in a Native-American dialect.)

Psychotic Goth: "You threaten to cancel me Rally like I'm some low rated television show or some offensive inanimate object. Too bad Rally because I'm very much alive and the SWAT ringsiders know who they want to cancel. That person is you Rally. You shall be the one suffering great drought s I deprive you of your water breaks as well as your water. I'll drink it as you lay on the floor in thirst as you sweat and glisten with fluids coming from the pores of your skin."

(Psychotic Goth laughs dementedly.)

Psychotic Goth: "I shall make you suffer. I shall not care because you had it coming for all the sins you accumulated over the years. This serpent shall make sure of it Rally. I shall keep my vow."

(He lowers his head and raises his arms and flings his head back revealing his pale handsome gothlike looks.)

Psychotic Goth: "Rally in a matter of moments that continue to tick down. You and I shall step into the ring but I give you a chance to save face and not show up. For I shall cancel you. Thus I have spoken and thus I shall make my vow come true."

(The scene slowly fades to black.)

[SWAT Team]

Andrew Fulton: Oh I’ve been waiting for this all night Jerry! The Founder and the wanna-be commish get to fight Eddie D!

Jeremy Tucker: Yes but who did Eddie choose as his new partner?


*The haunting vocal intro for "The Hard Sell" by Coheed and Cambria hits the speakers and the lights dim and blue and gold spotlights strobe around the arena. The video screen lights up with a familiar theme as it reads, "And now … SWAT presents … its MAIN ATTRACTION!" A foot shatters the screen and we cut to images from DT's matches in MCCW against the likes of Nelly Angel, Weaselpop, and Eichi Yamaguchi. The first verse sets in as the screen shows DT tapping out Jason Justice and being handed the MCCW World title for the second time.

"I'm paranoid, and sick of this world's misconception of things I did. My language poured across this wrist in a metaphoric disaster."

Andrew Fulton: Wait what’s this asshole doing coming out here? He isn’t cleared to be here!

Jeremy Tucker: He’s not medically cleared to wrestle. He can’t get physical, nothing saying he can’t be in the building.

*Death Trap steps down the ramp in his Armani suit and bowler hat. He high fives fans as he approaches the commentary table. He pops on a headset.*

Death Trap: Gentlemen. How we doing tonight?

Andrew Fulton: Great until right about now!

Death Trap: Nice to see you too you mark.

Jeremy Tucker: What are you doing down here DT?

Death Trap: Well with that idiot Eric Dane done and dusted I figured I’d help out with the commentary to offset this mouthpiece for the KGBastards. And all thanks to me dropping Eric Dane on his head on steel at the rumble. Satisfying!

Andrew Fulton: Actually the board fired him!

Death Trap: Who is this board? I need to speak with them.

[“My Heart Beats With People” by Jonnie Valentine hits the speakers. Jonnie jogs down to the ring, slapping fans hands, doing a full lap around the front row. He finds an old lady or geeky teen singing his theme song, and he sings along with them. He pulls on the top rope to vault inside the ring and does the double guns to the crowd]

Frank Salazar: Entering first, at 234 pounds and 5 feet 10 inches, from Palm Springs, California … The COMMISSIONER OF SWAT … JONNIE VALENTINE!

Andrew Fulton: Don’t lie to the people Frankie, he’s a punk!

Death Trap: He’s not the best example of a power figure but he’s MILES better than that idiot Armand. Couldn’t run a business anywhere but the ground.

Andrew Fulton: What do you have against the KGB? They’re the best!

Death Trap: Really? I came in to do one match as a favor to Radu and Armand tried to have me and my friends LITERALLY killed. That is insanity. I am the only one here giving these SWAT fans what they wanna see. I’m their mouthpiece.

Andrew Fulton: You mean loudmouth.

[Rip it Up by 28 Days hits as we switch back to the ring, there is a couch and a coffee table and the set of Suit's Suite is in the ring. Mad Dog Paul Soutter makes his way down to the ring, high fiving the fans, no selling social distancing.]

Frank Salazar: And his partner, from Melbourne, Australia, at 6 feet and 4 inches tall and weighing in at 364 pounds … he is the FOUNDER … MAD DOG PAUL SOUTTER!

[On the SWAT Tron we see doctored footage of Tom Cruise jumping up and down on the couch imposed in the ring. Then more doctored footage showing Rick James/Dave Chappelle on his back stamping his feet on the couch. FUCK_ YO_ COUCH. Now a shot of Heidi giving Suit a lap dance on the couch on the SWAT tron.]

Jeremy Tucker: Well the founder and Jonnie are certainly no strangers to each other. It is going to be strange to see them working together.

Andrew Fulton: Just give it time, Eddie and the KGB will bury them!

Death Trap: Which of the goon squad is he gonna work with? Armand and Joanne strike me as the too busy to help types. And Frostbite is too busy setting tables on fire and making rule 34 art of the SWAT title.

[Cave by Muse blares and Eddie D walks out with a black and white montage video playing on the screens of him weight training and hitting his favourite moves on people, flashing up in negative to the beat of the music.

He regularly threatens rude fans, tears up opponents fan posters on his way to the ring, has vicious one liner for an "ugly" fan, he walks confidently and slowly to the ring. Raises his hands to accept the praise he feels he is due, but the crowd erupt in a chorus of boos and jeers.]

Frank Salazar: Introducing now, hailing from Vernon, California, USA. Coming in at 6’ and 303 pounds .... THE BIG DEAL .... EDDIE D!!!

Jeremy Tucker: Huh … how strange, Eddie has come out alone?

Andrew Fulton: What a man! He’s going to show everyone he is the true world champ by taking them both out alone! Look at him wave off the ref and tell him to ring the bell.

Death Trap: Well this is interesting. I didn’t see that coming. Glad I can be here to witness this show.

Jeremy Tucker: DT, speaking of, what is your status? You weren’t meant to be at the rumble and obviously you are out of action here tonight.

Death Trap: Got some doctor’s visits in the coming days to sort this whole deal out. Mongo doesn’t play games with his old men. Or his money. But … let’s just say I’ll have to address this whole ordeal on the next Battleground. I have a big announcement to make …

[DING DING DING!]

Andrew Fulton: And we’re off here Jerry. Looks like the Founder wants the first crack at the future SWAT Champion!

Jeremy Tucker: And boy are they tearing it up. Look at them both just throwing bombs at each other! No care for their own safety! Punches and overhand blows galore. And neither one is giving an inch. It’s like the blows aren’t damaging them. The crowd is getting hot early here!

Andrew Fulton: Oh, but Eddie, of course, taking control! A huge shove sends Soutter to his ample behind!

Death Trap: Doesn’t that “ample behind” still sign your checks?

Andrew Fulton: Not for years since he lost the fed to Joe, then that dang Radu had to stick his beak in and screw everything up! Soutter pops back to his feet and shoves Eddie back. Eddie is not feeling it though. Look how he stops on a dime. Snap jab, and another. And a forearm smash for good measure. The Founder is reeling!

Jeremy Tucker: Jonnie is reaching for a tag but Soutter holds up one finger as if telling him to give him a minute. How bold of Suit here.

Andrew Fulton: The word you are looking for is foolish. Look he moved right into Eddie D’s hammer lock! Oh but Suit ducks behind and gets Eddie in a full nelson! But look at the big bruiser go! He just threw down his arms and shattered the hold!

Jeremy Tucker: Eddie turns around .. OH GOD! What a headbutt from Suit! The founder rattling the brains of the strongman! A clothesline! … And Eddie is still up! Suit seems offended that Eddie has disrespected his power. He grabs the big KGB powerman and whips him into his own corner. OH what a body avalanche!

Andrew Fulton: Valentine tags himself in, what an opportunist scum. And an arm drag into an armbar as Eddie stumbles out of the corner. A parting stomp from Suit as he exits the ring but the ref calls for the hold to break! Suit just inadvertently broke the arm bar!

Jeremy Tucker: Johnnie seems fine with this and locks in a headlock. Eddie begins to struggle. Oh and he’s to his feet. AAAAND back down again, headlock take over from Valentine. The commish smirks to the fans and winks to them. What a man of the people! I think …

Andrew Fulton: It’s comical you think the founder and the fake commish are the “good guys” in this. The KGB are the good guys, the BEST guys!

Death Trap: Oh aren’t you a precious little rosebud. The KGB are everything wrong with this business. Even Soutter with his past can see that! Eddie may be their muscle. But that doesn’t excuse him from their horrific acts. Armand needs to be put out of our misery. Whether Jonnie is the man to do that? ….. Eeeeeeeehhhhhh who else is in the back?

Andrew Fulton: Eddie showing his raw power by standing up and hoisting up Valentine. Vertical suplex! Wow look at the technique as the ladies’ man pops the hips and rolls into a second lift!

Jeremy Tucker: Johnnie however escapes and rolls down his back! Oh and a fierce kick on the way down from Eddie D! And he’s now acting like Jonnie raked his eyes! The ref missed the cheap shot kick!

Death Trap: Did he really just donkey kick a bro? Dick move man.

[Jonnie limps over to Soutter and tags the big man.]

Jeremy Tucker: All the acting from Eddie cost him as he forgot this is a tag match! Where IS Eddie’s partner anyhow?

Andrew Fulton: He don’t need no partner! Too easy for Eddie as he hits the kitchen sink to the charging Soutter! I bet he felt that in the down under.

Jeremy Tucker: Eddie is showboating too much and misses the leg drop. Suit is quick to his feet … relatively … and begins to lay into Eddie as he sits up. The crowd is counting along! FIVE! SIX! Seven punches from the Aussie Enforcer.

Andrew Fulton: Mad Dog didn’t see that coming! Eddie just poked him in the eyes. Soutter is blinded!

Death Trap: Is it really surprising anymore when cheaters cheat? I mean shouldn’t we all expect this shit?

Jeremy Tucker: Maybe, but Suit apparently wasn’t ready and now Eddie with a scoop slam. Eddie with the big splash and a pin!

[ONE! TWO! Jonnie breaks up the count.]

Andrew Fulton: Look at that worm Valentine! He’s pulling Eddie’s hair!

Death Trap: That was a picture perfect dropkick if ever I saw one.

Andrew Fulton: The founder is taking a long time to take advantage as Valentine is escorted to the apron. Aaaaand he got there!

[ONE! Eddie rolls out of the count]

Death Trap: That move did more to Paul than I thought. Isn’t he usually resilient?

Andrew Fulton: As much as you, you prick.

[Eddie and Suit slowly get to their feet. Headbutt from the founder! Headbutt from Eddie! Forearm from Soutter!]

Andrew Fulton: Eddie didn’t like that one! He’s got hold of Soutter and what a beal toss. Look how he crashed into the corner! And here comes the big stinger splash!

Jeremy Tucker: No! Valentine tags in and shoves Soutter out of the corner. Eddie crashes into the boot of Jonnie!

Death Trap: Huh… guess the old man has some tricks up his sleeve. Gotta take notes.

Jeremy Tucker: Valentine hops over the ropes and into the ring. He slams Eddie’s head into the turnbuckle pad! Twice! Three times! FOUR TIMES!

Death Trap: That poor turnbuckle …

Andrew Fulton: Jonnie with an ugly looking jumping kick thing. Just miserable!

Jeremy Tucker: Oh would you stop? Jonnie with the cover.

[ONE! TWO! Eddie uses all his might to press Jonnie into the air and toss him off!]

Jeremy Tucker: Staying on the attack, Jonnie runs in with a sliding clothesline to the sitting Eddie. Jonnie with a double foot stomp on the elbow! And a knee drop! And another!

Death Trap: Smart strategy, sap the strength of the big man by removing his dominant arm. Though Eddie has a history of left knee problems, maybe he should target that? A good figure four would do it.

Andrew Fulton: We can’t all be “submission Gods” like YOU Death Trap. If that IS your real name!

Death Trap: You said it not me. And no … I mean my real name is on my profile.

Andrew Fulton: People only read about the good wrestlers.

Death Trap: … How many world titles have YOU won?

Jeremy Tucker: As we continue here, Johnnie has a sleeper hold locked in now on the big man. The ref is checking for a tap out but nothing happening there. Eddie is able to roll to his knees and stands up!

Andrew Fulton: He falls back and squishes that little insect Valentine! Pinfall!

[One! Two! Jonnie just manages to slide out from under Eddie.]

Death Trap: Why didn’t Suit stop the count?

Andrew Fulton: He’s still hurt from being old and arthritic and facing down the muscle monster that is Eddie D!

Jeremy Tucker: Eddie now in full control as he grabs Jonnie and hoists him up with a powerslam! Jonnie rolling under the ropes.

Death Trap: Ring awareness from the commish!

Andrew Fulton: Eddie D stalking the false commissioner. He’s got Jonnie by the arm and is pulling him back into the ring. BRAIN BUSTAAAAA!!!!!

Death Trap: Those things hurt … trust me.

Jeremy Tucker: Eddie looks at the Founder with malice in his eyes as he smiles and puts one foot on Jonnie’s chest. Soutter looks like he wants to enter the ring but thinks better of it.

[ONE! TWO! ……. Eddie looks down at Valentine holding the bottom rope. Eddie stomps the hand away. ONE! TWO! … Jonnie pops the shoulder and the crowd!]

Andrew Fulton: Eddie looks mad. This is it. He hauls Jonnie to his feet. THAT BASTARD! HE SPIT IN EDDIE’S EYES!

Death Trap: And a big dive and his hand hits the hand of Soutter! Paul looking fairly spry for a big lad and comes barrelling in with a shoulder block to Eddie. Eddie stumbles off the ropes and on the return … ANOTHER shoulder from the Mad Dog!

Jeremy Tucker: Eddie drops to his buttocks! Soutter pins!

[One! Kickout!]

Andrew Fulton: Too easy for Eddie D!

Death Trap: Suit needs to stay on the attack. Those stomps aren’t cutting it!

Andrew Fulton: Eddie D to his feet! Suit charges in … he tries to lift Eddie for the Soutter Special! But look at Eddie fighting it! Suit gives up and whips Eddie off the ropes and hits a big spear!

[ONE! TWO! Kickout by Eddie!]

Death Trap: Suit looks angry at that kickout. He pulls Eddie to his corner. Ooh he tags in Jonnie and they set him up! It’s gonna be a double superplex! … Wait …

[‘The KGB Theme’ (Deep Cover instrumental) hits the arena and onto the stage walk Joanne Canelli, Armand von Krauss, and Frostbite!]

Death Trap: Ugh, these jokers.

Andrew Fulton: I knew it! They got Eddie’s back!

Jeremy Tucker: Looks like Suit and Jonnie have dropped Eddie to the canvas and now stand in the ring waiting. Suit takes a position in the center of the ring standing over Eddie. Jonnie stands in front of him taunting the KGB!

Andrew Fulton: Who is gonna be the one! Which one is gonna be Eddie D’s partner?

Death Trap: Wouldn’t shock me if the four clowns and that idiot Gabriel Tuck came from behind and …WHAT THE FUCK!?

[Soutter slides on a pair of brass knuckles and cleans the clock of Jonnie Valentine!!!!]

Andrew Fulton: YES! There it is people the Founder is Home!

Death Trap: You have to be fucking kidding me. *throws his headset to the desk*

Jeremy Tucker: Is it true?! Has Paul Soutter rejoined the KGB!?

[The other three march to the ring laughing. Soutter lifts Valentine and tosses him to Eddie who connects with the Headache from Hell. He rolls him over.

ONE!
TWO!
THREE!]

Frank Salazar: Your winners by pinfall … the KGB!

Andrew Fulton: This is a great day!

Jeremy Tucker: The founder just turned on Jonnie and laid him out and left him to Eddie!

Andrew Fulton: And now all five of them are laying the boots to Jonnie! He’s trying to escape but there is none!

Jeremy Tucker: The KGB stand in the ring united. Wait what’s this? DT has left us and is now pulling Valentine from the ring!

Andrew Fulton: STUPID! The KGB will kill him!

[Soutter holds his arms out to restrain Frostbite and Eddie D however. He reminds them that DT is not cleared and they could get in deep trouble with the board if they attack him.]

Andrew Fulton: That moron Death Trap is left standing over a broken Valentine watching the KGB celebrate! I love it!

Jeremy Tucker: We’ll have to wait and see what happens next Battleground with the Founder, and with Death Trap’s big announcement.

[DT looks Soutter in the eyes. He looks disappointed more than anything. He shakes his head and helps Jonnie to the back as the Bandits celebrate in the ring, pleased as punch with themselves and being all together again.]

[thecomedian]

<Fade in to "The Golden God" Rally Jackson backstage at the SWAT show.>

Rally Jackson:  Did he just say Native American?  DID HE JUST SAY NATIVE AMERICAN?

<Rally is having a fit.  He swings someone around by his shoulders.>

Rally Jackson:  Hey referee.

::it' a hot dog vendor::

Psychotic Goth just referred to indigenous people as Native Americans.  What does he think this is the 1990's?  He needs to be fired.  Go out there.  Announce me as the winner of the match and new world's champion.  Goth needs to be stripped.  He is not using the proper terminology.  It is time we put an end to this triggering verbiage.  It is dangerous.

<The hot dog vendor looks at him as if he wants to help him, but not sure what to do.  He can't because he's a hot dog vendor.  Rally sees someone else in the distance.>

Rally Jackson:  Soutter! Soutter!  You have a lot of pull here.

::it's a fat hot dog vendor::

Fire him Soutt!  I'm a big fan of "Soutt's Shoot" by the way.  I never miss an episode.  But he has to go.  He his not woke enough.  You can't call indigenous people Native American.  Who is this guy, Archie Bunker?  Native American by definition would be anyone born in America, which would make Cardi B as native to America as the entire Iroquois nation.

<The fat hot dog vendor offers him a couple hot dogs.>

Rally Jackson:  Suspend him, put him on a leave of absence.  Make him do the work as I have before we let him back into society. In the meantime, just make me the champion again.  It is what the people deserve.  They need to know they have a champion that is pound sign woke.  They need a champion that will callout injustice when he sees it.

Wait.

Soutter.

SOUTTERRRRRR!!!

::Rally screams::

Where is your mask????

<Rally knocks the tray out of the hot dog vendor's hand knocking franks everywhere before storming off.>

Rally Jackson:  And don't even get me started on Vampira.  First of all, it is a celebration of the patriarch that a male wrestler would have a female assistant.  It is so typical.  I can smell your toxic masculinity from here and I don't like it.

Vampira is an offensive name.  It separates our genders.  In order for you to obey woke culture, your new name must be Vampirx.  It is gender neutral.  This is your name.  This is not optional.

And Goth, as if I need to explain myself to you, a man who clearly cannot obey our vision of a woketopia, I already addressed why I was allowed to wrestle a woman while Radu was given a life sentence in pc prison.  That day and on that day alone, I chose my pronouns as they/them which made me gender neutral and able to compete. For what it's worth, I decided on he/him now.  Those are the pronouns I am comfortable with.

What do you see wrong with sex workers by the way?  And that is what you are to refer to them from now on, instead of that awful p word.  I respect a woman's right to choose what she wants to do with her body.  If She wants to use it to profit off the patriarch then I empower Her.  In fact, I empowered many sex workers over and over and over.  Why should a man go watch porn hub and objectify women free of charge, but a woman can't profit off it?

You patriarch.  You toxic machismo.  You think women should just be in the kitchen or in the case of Vampirx your assistant?  You don't want women to do what makes them happy?  You think it is ok for toxic masculine men to just objectify them, but the moment a woman finds a way to use that to Her advantage and make money it is suddenly immoral?

You make me sick.  I'm triggered.  

I bet you call Indigenous People's Day, Columbus Day.  I bet you think the colonizers came to this continent to make friends and sit around and eat turkey with the great indigenous people.

Say their names.

Cherokee

Apache

Iroquois

Mayan

Say their names.

<Fade.>

[Donzig]

'Excuse me, sir? I asked for an Eddie shirt.' said the kid, looking very confused as he stared at the Keith Williams t-shirt in his hands. He looked back up, and the man who had waited on him turned in the merch booth. He was wearing a skull mask, and a leather jacket which was rather odd. The kid blinked, and the figure stepped closer before the masked head tilted. And a voice grated from under the mask, and a finger jabbed towards the child.

'Eddie is a loser. You'll be much happier with the King of Sleaze.'

The kid blinked, and looked down at the shirt in his hands. He was clearly confused, shaking his head before he held out the shirt again. 'Bu--'

Donzig waved his fingers angrily, motioning him away before his head turned to the next person in line. But his gaze remained on the pair of angry looking SWAT security as they scanned the area before one pointed down the hallway through the crowd. They were moving slowly away from the merchandise booth, and he nodded before he looked back to the soccer mom before him. She pointed, and smiled widely. 'I need one of those! A Phantam Fairtex shirt in small. He's so fine!'

'Do-lang-do-lang-do-lang!' muttered the masked Donzig before he shoved a shirt into her grasp, and her money was tossed into the cash box. She looked at the shirt in her hands, eyes widening before she held it up. Waving it at him as she called out. 

'Hey! This is a Blaze shirt! I said Phanta--'

Donzig tilted his masked head, and hissed at the woman as his fingers flicked again. 'It's not a small either.'

'I've never!' the woman's face reddened, and she stalked off angrily. Muttering under her breath about finding a manager, and Donzig shrugged. He turned to find Sinclair staring at him, and she shook her head with a faint smile. 

'You know customer service might not be your strong suit.'


'And said unto them, It is written, My house shall be called the house of prayer; but ye have made it a den of thieves.' Donzig growled as he ignored the customers behind him. Sinclair sidestepped, and smiled as she quickly glanced around. There was something odd about the way she stepped again as Donzig' head tilted, and his arms folded over his chest. 'What is behind you?'

'Behind me? Nothing! We should go before security gets smart.' Sinclair said quickly, smoothing her long coat before she flicked her hair back. Another step as Donzig tilted his head to look over her shoulder. A clerk behind her was clearly making a killing, and a trickle of kids was running back and forth as Sinclair looked over her shoulder. She turned back to him, smiling as she motioned for them to go.

'Sinclair. What is behind you?'

'Nothing?'

'Move aside.' Donzig was not having it, and he reached out to gently nudge his valet aside. Behind her hanging on the boards, and stacked on the counter were masks.

Stylized skull masks. Masks that looked like his own. People were buying them, wearing them, running away with them! The clerk grinned at him and Sinclair, flashing a thumbs up as Donzig stood motionless. Sinclair clasped her hands in front of her, gritting her teeth before forcing a smile. She gave a quick shake of her head before a low growl came from under the mask.

'They dare to mock my mask? The sign of my office and station? The very visage of the Herald of Oblivion?' Donzig stared at the rack of skull masks and then hisses. He took a step forward, rolling his shoulders as his head lowered.

'It is a best seller!' quipped the clerk, clearly oblivious.

'And you get 50% of the take.' said Sinclair as she held up her hands.

Donzig paused. 'Yes. Let the children wear my mask as a sign of their loyalty to the Scourge. This pleases me.'

Sinclair almost wilted with relief, smiling as she gave a thumbs up to the clerk. Then she pointed over his shoulder, and Donzig turned to see a certain soccer mom pushing her way through the crowd with a man wearing a 'Staff' t-shirt who looked very annoyed. Behind them came a cluster of security, who were staring very curiously at the pair of odd figures in the booth. Donzig grunted sourly, and then moved to quickly roll across the counter before landing in a run. Sinclair followed after him, shaking her head as they darted through the now staring cluster of fans as the security started to shout.

'You know this is your fault, right?' she snapped.

'What are the margins?' 

'What? On the masks? You want to know now?'

Donzig snorted a laugh, shaking his head as he pushed through another group of fans. 'No time like the present, eh?'

'They cost four to make, twenty five bucks a mask?' Sinclair replied, trying not to laugh herself.

'Ah, 10.50 a mask. Nice.' Donzig growled, as he spun to leap down a narrow flight of stairs. Sinclair chased after him, and the crowd blocked the stairs from view as they raced downward. 'I hate Cleveland.'

[SWAT Team]

“Will you be my Valentine?”

-Splashing and sploshing around can be heard whilst we fade into a beautifully arranged custom bathroom, only the candle-light to guide our way to her. The Blackpool Bombshell, enjoying herself one helluva bubble bath after arguably her toughest two weeks in SWAT History! She has one naked knee poking up out of the bubbles, her arms and shoulders are relaxed on the sides of the tub and the rest of her is covered as she speaks in a cool, calm and collected tone, showing us a new “chill” side of Blaze Freya-



“When I first walked backstage after being rolled up n’ “upset” by the weakest link of The KGB, I was lost. I felt like I was the only one still fighting a losing war because let’s face it, it’s me versus them. Nobody else was stepping up, it was just me standing up to them n’ saying: “Hey, I’ll fuck you up if you try to tear your way through this roster.” N’ I believe I have in some ways, just not any of the ways I wanted to.”

-Blaze shakes her head shamefully, looking similar to a disciplined dog trying to express its feelings of sorrow-

“But then… just when I hit my locker room to pack my bags up for the week, I spy with my blue little eye, the Suit man of all people, rejoining the KGB at the expense of his best fucking friend in this business. -Scoffs- If that’s how you do business with your friends, I’d hate to see how you do business with anyone else. You sniveling little weasel! You probably planned that for weeks without his knowledge, just waiting to stab him in the back, yeah? That’s how you KGB cowards operate. Wait for a distraction like Joanne, wait til their back is turned like the man in the Suit. Or, you could do like Eddie n’ hide behind a locked door.”

-She sits up and leans forward to lock those icy blue eyes on us as if we were all part of the KGB and she knew it-

“I just hope you all realize, Eddie D got one up on me, Joanne got one up on me n’ I’m still coming. You can jump me on every show, interfere in ALL of my matches, it will not make a difference. I won’t stop until the KGB is DEAD! I’ll take what matters most from every last member until they crumble under pressure, if I’m the only one willing to take on this group of cheaters n’ wannabe’s, I’ll be the only one responsible for saving this federation when I make for damn SURE they don’t represent ALL of us with their fuckery! N’ that’s all I got to say about THAT!”



-Freya stands up and our scene fades just before we get any sneak peeks at the goods, leaving us to wonder if she has indeed used these losses as further motivation to bring the fight to the KGB, or if she’s still foolishly underestimating them despite their recent victories over her. Stay tuned to find out! ONLY on SWAT!

[SWAT Team]

"Bounce" by Danko Jones plays as Isabel Rios defiantly storms out to the stage. Giving a quick flex that the crowd pops for, the competitor appears to be all business tonight as there isn't any interaction with the fans. Isabel enters the ring, bouncing to her feet as the music dies down and she waits for her opponent.

Frank Salazar: The following contest is scheduled for one fall with a twenty minute time limit and is for the SWAT Amazons Championship! Standing in the ring at this time, the challenger... At a height of 5'6"... Weighing 161 pounds... She is your 2021 No Man's Land winner... ISSSSSAAAABBBBBBELLLLLLLLLL RIIIIIIIIIIOOOOOOOOOSSSSSSSS!!!

Appreciatively throwing an arm aloft, Isabel walks over to a corner.

Jeremy Tucker: Nowhere in the XHF can you find a roster of women as hard hitting and competitive as the Amazons, NPW and SWATs finest covet this belt, the next match will be a testament to that when "Dynamite Kid" Nicole Anderson defends her Amazons Championship against the 2021 No Man's Land Winner, Isbael Rios.

Andrew Fulton: Jerry, this is sure to be a match of the year contender!

Anticipating the champion's arrival, a section of fans start to chant for Kid Dynamite until "Lights Out" by Hollywood Undead hits and they completely lose their minds cheering. The SWAT Amazons Championship around her waist, Nicole Anderson slowly saunters out to more adulation.

Frank Salazar: Making her way to the ring, from Miami Beach, Florida... Standing in tonight at 5'6"... Weighing 149 pounds... The reigning and defending SWAT Amazons Champion... "KID DYNAMITE" NIIICCCCCCCOOOOLLLLEEEEEEE ANNNNNNNDERRRRRRRSOONNNNNNNNNN!!!

Stopping midway down the ramp, Anderson looks at the gold she's wearing and then brings her gaze to meet Isabel's. There's an awkward stare off that feels like it lasts an eternity as neither woman blinks or moves. Casually resuming her stride to the ring, Kid Dynamite hops on the ring apron, unbuckling the title from around her waist. Raising the championship above her head, Anderson again mean mugs her opponent and wants it known who the champion walking into this match is.

Jeremy Tucker: Both wrestlers meet in the middle of the ring where official Phil Weston explains the rules, checks them for foreign objects, and relieves the champion of her championship. Holding the SWAT Amazons Championship overhead for everyone to see, the referee walks over to the ropes and hands the gold to a SWAT employee who takes it to the timekeeper's table.

Andrew Fulton: That's the bell, this match has officially started!

Jeremy Tucker: Since Phil has stepped away, neither woman has budged an inch. Isabel looks at Nicole from top to bottom as Kid Dynamite does the same.

Andrew Fulton: Still motionless, these two are continuing to size each other up!

Jeremy Tucker: It doesn't matter, because the fans can't get enough of it! Dueling chants for both athletes as it's split 50/50.

LET'S GO, RI-OS! LET'S GO, AN-DER-SON! LET'S GO, RI-OS! LET'S GO, AN-DER-SON! LET'S GO, RI-OS! LET'S GO, AN-DER-SON!

Andrew Fulton: I can barely hear myself, Jerry!

Jeremy Tucker: The first to start things, Rios suggests a test of strength by raising both hands in the air. Considering the invitation, Anderson obliges and lifts her hands in the air, interlinking fingers with the challenger.

Andrew Fulton: Jockeying for position, they plant their feet and muster all the power they have to be the one that gets the advantage. Initially Nicole is starting to force Rios to bend backward when Isabel puts a halt to that, reversing the direction of who is pushing the most. Overpowering the champion, Rios has Anderson at such an incline that the champion's head is pressed into the mat!

Jeremy Tucker: Able to push back slightly, Kid Dynamite ceases and uses the momentum of her opponent to flip Isabel over with an armdrag! On her feet again, Isabel dashes at Nicole and is met with yet another armdrag sending her across the ring!

Andrew Fulton: Aiming for the champion's head, Rios rushes Anderson and has her clothesline countered into a judo throw! Keeping hold of Isabel's arm as the SWAT Amazons Champion rolls to her feet, Nicole pulls Isabel in tight and has her tangled in a Mousetrap pin! Is it over already?!

ONE!!!


TWO!!!


KICKOUT!!!

Jeremy Tucker: Both combatants swiftly get to their feet as Kid Dynamite indicates how close she was to beating Rios by showing her thumb and index finger barely not touching.

Andrew Fulton: Cautiously approaching each other, they take turns slapping their hands away as Nicole and Isabel steadily enter a second test of strength. Not giving Rios the chance to get the better of her, Anderson slips behind her adversary and executes a rear waistlock takedown! Springing off the canvas... STANDING MOONSAULT!!!

Jeremy Tucker: Narrowly avoiding the finisher, Isabel scrambles to stand as Nicole lands on her feet. Wrapping an arm around Kid Dynamite's neck from behind, Rios hooks Anderson's right leg and muscles her skyward... REDTAIL DRIVER!!!

Andrew Fulton: Wiggling out of the move, Nicole slides down the back of Isabel as she spins to face the titleholder. Copying what happened earlier, Isabel mocks Nicole by using her fingers to show how close she was to hitting it!

Jeremy Tucker: These two have done their homework and it shows! Both women are well aware of what the other can do!

Andrew Fulton: Isabel earned her spot here tonight by winning the No Man's Land tournament. Can she capitalize on that success and transition it into a title win? Or will she fail? We're going to find out!

Jeremy Tucker: Testing their strikes, champion and challenger trade forearms until Anderson ducks under a forearm from Rios! Nicole sprints in the opposite direction, bouncing off the ropes and rebounding in the direction of Isabel as she leap frogs to avoid her foe! Not stopping, Anderson hits the ropes from a different side, running at Rios and catching her with a headscissors takedown!

Andrew Fulton: Rolling to her feet, Isabel braces herself a moment before she's annihilated by a SHOTGUN DROPKICK! RIOS FLIES THROUGH THE ROPES TO THE OUTSIDE!

Jeremy Tucker: I can't believe how hard and fast she hit her, Fulton. That was unbelievable!

Andrew Fulton: Using the apron of the ring to guide herself vertical, Rios looks up just as Kid Dynamite sails over the top rope and twists her body to land on Isabel! CORKSCREW PLANCHA!!!

Jeremy Tucker: Nicole is the first to stand and she taunts the fans to huge cheers! Turning to Rios, Anderson lets off several sharp kicks to the thighs and ribs of her opponent. Irish whipped across the floor, Isabel slams into the steel barricade, immediately favoring her back!

Andrew Fulton: Still full of energy, Kid Dynamite races at Isabel and rocks her with another SHOTGUN DROPKICK!!!

Jeremy Tucker: The impact of it nearly sends Rios backflipping over, but she manages to stay ringside!

Andrew Fulton: Grabbing a handful of hair, Nicole leads the stunned Isabel back to the ring and forces her under the bottom rope!

Jeremy Tucker: Stepping up on the apron, Anderson grabs hold of the top rope and slingshots into the ring, landing across Rios with a senton! Clambering on top of Rios, Nicole makes a pin! Weston is there to count it!

ONE!!!


TWO!!!


KICKOUT!!!

Andrew Fulton: Kid Dynamite is determined to retain the SWAT Amazons Championship!

Jeremy Tucker: And Rios is equally intent on winning it!

Clapping to show their appreciation, those in attendance start an obligatory chant of, "THIS IS AWESOME!"

Andrew Fulton: The SWAT faithful can't get enough of this action!

Jeremy Tucker: This is what wrestling is all about! Two skilled fighters vying for a title! Blink and you'll regret it! You don't want to miss any of the next level skill we're seeing displayed!

Andrew Fulton: On all fours, trying to compose herself, Rios is an easy target for... A RUNNING SCISSOR KICK!!!

Jeremy Tucker: Laid out on the canvas, Rios can't stop Anderson from ascending to the top turnbuckle. Measuring the distance, Nicole leaps and aims for Isabel's mid-section with both feet... TOP ROPE DOUBLE STOMP!!!

Andrew Fulton: Stomping into the mat, Kid Dynamite misses Rios as she rotates her body out of harm's way and under the bottom rope to the outside! Catching a breather, Isabel watches as the SWAT Amazons Champion clears the length of the ring in a few strides, diving directly at her!

Jeremy Tucker: TOPE SUICIDA!!!

Andrew Fulton: What the? Did she? RIOS SNATCHED ANDERSON OUT OF MID-AIR!!!

Jeremy Tucker: She's got the champ grappled! Isabel is maintaining a suplex, delaying the inevitable!

Andrew Fulton: Moving closer to the ring, Rios abruptly drops Anderson on her head on the apron! BRAINBUSTER! BRAINBUSTER!! BRAINBUSTER!!!

Jeremy Tucker: The sound was sickening! Like a vegetable, Kid Dynamite lies immobile where she was dropped.

Andrew Fulton: Isabel isn't done, Jerry! She's joined Nicole on the ring apron! What does Rios have in mind?

Jeremy Tucker: I don't know, but it can't mean good news for Anderson!

Andrew Fulton: Rios lifts Anderson, scooping her up and tossing her backward with an... EXPLODER SUPLEX DIRECTLY ON THE RING APRON!!!

For a while the only thing you can hear is the fans relentlessly yelling, "HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT!"

Jeremy Tucker: Pushing Nicole back inside the ring, Isabel follows and covers her.

ONE!!!


TWO!!!


THREE??? NO!!! KICKOUT!!!

Andrew Fulton: And this match will continue! Hoisting the champion from the ground in one easy motion, Isabel slams Nicole down in a series of rib breakers, completing the combo by easily tossing Anderson behind her with a FALLAWAY SLAM!

Jeremy Tucker: Flexing while trash talking the temporarily fallen Kid Dynamite, fans shower cheers on Isabel, absolutely loving it!

Andrew Fulton: She'd better be careful or it'll cost her!

Jeremy Tucker: Still showing off her fit physique, Isabel lets Nicole rise.

Andrew Fulton: This is what I was talking about! Rios is making a mistake letting her opponent recover.

Jeremy Tucker: Adjusting her neck, attempting to work past the punishment received, Kid Dynamite walks up to Isabel and without needing provocation, unleashes a stiff forearm to the face! Unmoved, Rios keeps flexing, loudly asking for further violence!

Andrew Fulton: Smiling, Anderson dishes out a flurry of forearms!

Jeremy Tucker: Nodding her head like she approves, Rios abandons the muscle show to mete out some offense of her own! FOREARM! FOREARM! FOREARM! FOREARM! FOREARM! FOREARM!

Andrew Fulton: Her pace is only quickening! She isn't finished! FOREARM! FOREARM! FOREARM! FOREARM!

Jeremy Tucker: Weakly striking once at Rios, Anderson collapses to her knees in front of the challenger.

Andrew Fulton: Kid Dynamite bit off more than she could chew!

Jeremy Tucker: When you mess with the bull, you get the horns!

Andrew Fulton: Still kneeling, the SWAT Amazons Champion clutches at Isabel. Allowing her brawn to do the talking, Isabel tucks the head of Nicole in between her legs and grabs her around the waist. Isabel rapidly elevates Anderson onto her shoulders, then whips her into the canvas with a POWERBOMB!!!

Jeremy Tucker: Oh my god! What a gross thud!

Andrew Fulton: Arms still grasping her legs, Rios crudely presses Anderson's frame to the mat for a pin!

ONE!!!


TWO!!!


2.555!!! KICKOUT!!!

Jeremy Tucker: Undeterred, Isabel heaves Nicole up for an additional powerbomb! Rios' might is so impressive!

Andrew Fulton: Recognizing she's in a rough spot, Kid Dynamite pelts Rios with a streak of forearms to the face from atop Isabel's shoulders! Legs wrapped around Rios' head, Anderson reverses and throws all of her weight to spin her opponent! HURRICANRANA STRAIGHT INTO A PIN!!!

ONE!!!


TWO!!!


2.999!!! KICKOUT!!!

Jeremy Tucker: My heart almost stopped! I thought Nicole had the match won!

Andrew Fulton: Rios went for broke, tried the same move and paid for it! She's lucky that wasn't three!

Raucous the entire match in their support of the two wrestlers, the crowd screams in unison, "FIGHT FOREVER! FIGHT FOREVER! FIGHT FOREVER!"

Jeremy Tucker: Momentarily dazed and on her back, Rios is perfectly situated for a... STANDING MOONSAULT!!!

Andrew Fulton: That's gotta be it!

ONE!!!


TWO!!!


THREE!!!


NO!!! KICKOUT!!!

Jeremy Tucker: How much can Isabel withstand?! Is Nicole nearing her limit?!

Andrew Fulton: Dragging Rios to a corner, Anderson puts space between them, focus completely on her rival. Pointing at Isabel, Nicole plows across the ring and doesn't stop! DOUBLE RUNNING KNEES IN THE CORNER!!!

Jeremy Tucker: Agony etched across her face, Kid Dynamite makes the trek to the top rope. Unable to regain her composure, Rios is prone and staring up at the lights! DIVING DOUBLE FOOT STOMP!!!

Andrew Fulton: Hoping to hit her mark, Nicole is instead blindsided as Isabel kips to her feet and... EUROPEAN UPPERCUTS THE CHAMPION!!!

Jeremy Tucker: Both women are wiped out! Whatever Rios had left, she used to prevent Anderson from finishing her off!

Andrew Fulton: As the official starts a ten count, each woman starts to stir. Neither makes it fully upright, only on their knees as they start to trade chops!

Jeremy Tucker: Rios eventually gets the better of Anderson and soon Kid Dynamite is entirely on the wrong end of a chop fest!

Andrew Fulton: How many chops has Nicole taken?

Jeremy Tucker: I've lost count.

Andrew Fulton: On her feet, Rios won't yield! The chops are endless and Nicole can hardly sit up while still on her knees! Hitting the ropes, Isabel picks up ever increasing speed as she makes pass after pass, finally launching herself at Kid Dynamite with a SLIDING FOREARM SMASH!!!

Jeremy Tucker: Maneuvering Nicole to her stomach, Isabel plucks her off the canvas from behind and executes a German Suplex! Not halting her grip, Isabel hauls Nicole up. RELEASE GERMAN SUPLEX!!!

Andrew Fulton: The angle she fell...

Jeremy Tucker: Is she moving? Phil Weston checks on Anderson's status, guaranteeing she can keep wrestling.

Andrew Fulton: Nine times out of ten, your back would take most of the damage, but Kid Dynamite was tossed entirely on her head and neck!

Jeremy Tucker: Walking over, Rios seizes the head of Anderson as she tries to use the bottom rope to stand. Pulled into an inverted facelock, the SWAT Amazons Champion boldly seeks to free herself, blindly lashing at any part of Isabel she can strike.

Andrew Fulton: Isabel fends off the rebellion, tightening the hold and clubbing the chest of Nicole repeatedly! Subdued, Anderson is raised, right leg hooked... REDTAIL DRIVER!!!

Jeremy Tucker: Wait, Rios isn't pinning Kid Dynamite like she normally would! She's repositioning! KOJI CLUTCH!!!

Andrew Fulton: Anderson is reaching for the bottom rope! It's so far away! Spitting, gasping for air, her face getting redder and redder... The life has been totally drained from her!

Jeremy Tucker: She's not responding to the referee!

Andrew Fulton: Arms hanging limply, Nicole's lifeless form is firmly locked. Rios is sustaining the Koji Clutch!

Jeremy Tucker: Hastily signaling to the timekeeper, the bell is rung as Phil Weston desperately tells Isabel the match has concluded and to let go!

Frank Salazar: Ladies and gentlemen, the winner of this contest and your NEW SWAT Amazons Champion... ISSAAAAAABEEELLLLLLLL RIIIIIIIIIIOOOOOOOSSSSSSS!!!

Excited at the result, the crowd shouts and claps at a deafening volume.

Andrew Fulton: The official has been given the SWAT Amazons Championship.

Jeremy Tucker: As he hands it to Rios she takes hold of it and looks at the gleaming gold.

Andrew Fulton: Coming to, Nicole notices that Isabel has the title.

Jeremy Tucker: She has nothing to be ashamed of. Anderson fought as hard as she could to defend.

Andrew Fulton: Stepping over, Rios helps Anderson to her feet and raises her arm as a show of respect!

Eating up the sportsmanship, the fans chant, "THANK YOU, AN-DER-SON! THANK YOU, AN-DER-SON! THANK YOU, AN-DER-SON!"

Jeremy Tucker: Did we just witness history?

Andrew Fulton: I think so.

[edwarddubin0604]

(The tron suddenly comes on and a mysterious figure in black appears with three other figures behind her. There are what looks like stars in the background as she looks over the ringsiders and then at Isabel Rios fixing her stare at her.)

Commandrix: "Remember me Isabel Rios. I know you do remember me quite well. Guess who's next if you actually are committed to defending your newly won championship and back up your mouth. I can wait until it's done but can you go through with the match if it does. We'll see......
Oh before I leave congratulations for actually backing up what you say."

(The tron goes black as the scene slowly fades to black.)

[SWAT Team]

(The show returns from commercials for The Anzac Cup, the finale of the first season of Timeless Alex Turner's and Roxylishus's reality television show, Reverend Marsh and his assistant promoting SWAT Magazine's story about them and The Hell Hounds and SWAT's streaming service's special on The KGB culminating with the three ominous figures continuing to warn about their impending arrival to SWAT. The scene fades to the arena where ringsiders hold signs that say "The King of the Goth's Rules!," "Booty Booty Rally smells like a rotten fruity!" "Armand smokes Egyptian toke!" "Release The Hell Hounds!" "KGB=Klowns, Goofballs and Bozos!" and "Frostbite and his cellphone dials up arson!" before fading to the commentator's table where Jeremy Tucker and Andrew Fulton are sitting wearing officially licensed SWAT masks and headsets. Andrew is still recovering from Donzig's assault earlier.)

Jeremy Tucker: "Welcome back to Battleground #38: Full Circle and we're still shocked at what Donzig did to my broadcast colleague Andrew Fulton. It was uncalled for and action should be taken for assaulting a member of SWAT's personnel."

Andrew Fulton: "Someone should put a bounty on his head or better kick him out of SWAT."

Jeremy Tucker: "I don't think that's going to happen anytime soon but the commissioner should do something about this matter. Let's switch to this next match that has Anzac Cup Tournament implications and the big question is who is going to make the cut to be in the tournament. Team Fairtex is in but who's going to be next to enter."

Andrew Fulton: "I missed that one compliments of that jerk Doing and that hussy."

Jeremy Tucker: "The Revenants stole the victory on their usual way."

Andrew Fulton: "Looks like they're in along with Team Fairtex also and are going to win the whole thing. Besides Team Fairtex is over the hill and they don't deserve to be in this prestigious tournament. Let the really worthy teams get into this tournament."

Jeremy Tucker: "They said it's not The Anzac Cup without them."

Andrew Fulton: "Yeah let's see if the seedings in the tournament match up to their bragging. Let's see if those idiots can end their Anzac Cup losing streak."

Jeremy Tucker: "They won the first one. Speaking of seedings this match does have some implications involving The KGB and The Hell Hounds and Armand and Frostbite have been on a roll since winning the SWAT World Tag Team Championships and The Hell Hounds have been undefeated since returning to SWAT after their JROK stint. Now they get a chance to regain the SWAT World Tag Team Championships in the Gund Arena."

Andrew Fulton: "Someone had better make sure the vet's at ringside to check The Hell Hounds for lice and other diseases. The KGB could be badly infected by those walking health hazards. Hell, they don't deserve to be in The Anzac Cup or anywhere near a ring unless they get every kind of shot including rabies and get a real long doggie bath."

Jeremy Tucker: "They don't need anything like that. Anyway, the commissioner and management decides the seedings. Getting back to this match The KGB's been demanding respect and they feel everyone else has been stealing their spotlight. Meanwhile they got sick of hearing Reverend Marsh demanding tag title matches and granted them a shot vowing a beatdown that even they won't regret delivering."

Andrew Fulton: "Yeah after he threatened to bring curses and holy hell down on The KGB and SWAT as well as fire, fury and brimstone for not donating money to his favorite charity. Imagine those dirty dogs winning the tag team championships. You won't even hear the last of Reverend Marsh's bragging and running his big mouth."

Jeremy Tucker: "After this match we'll find out who has the momentum going into the Anzac Cup. Be assured about one thing The KGB is obsessed with showing they are the true power in SWAT and everyone else is below them. The only thing is everyone thinks they are a bunch of mobsters."

Andrew Fulton: "Oh excuse me 'The Jersey Devil' Joanne Canelli's a mobster but you don't say it to her face and get mist in your eyes like I did. Besides, she's a businesswoman and she's one who makes shady business deals just like CEO Angela. She's also a former SWAT Amazons Women's Champion who was also screwed out of a championship shot. How does Isabel Rios winning the belt instead of her. Hell that's bias against The KGB."

Jeremy Tucker: "Right now let's go to the ring and see who's going to answer to who for this potential preview of The Anzac Cup Tournament and who will be the SWAT World Tag Team Champions."

Andrew Fulton: "Which is going to be the real men of SWAT also known as the most feared and ominous letters in the XHF and wrestling today, the ...... K ............ G ........... B."

Frank Salazar: "The following contest is scheduled for one fall and it's for the SWAT World Tag Team Championships. Introducing first from the Land of Filth and Honey. They come in at a total combined weight of 575lbs. They are being led down to the ring by Reverend Cornelius Marsh. Please welcome Cerberus and Psycho The Hell Hounds."

("I Put a Spell on You" by Marilyn Manson plays and The Reverend Cornelius Marsh leads The Hell Hounds down to the ring in chains attached to dog collars. The Hell Hounds wear hockey masks, have dirty dreadlocks, and their clothes are blood stained from previous matches; tattered and torn.)

Frank Salazar: "Now introducing from Cologne, Germany and Boulder, Colorado respectively. They come in at a total combined weight of 470lbs. They are the SWAT World Tag Team Champions and represent The KGB. Please welcome Armand von Krauss and Frostbite."

("The KGB Theme" hits and Armand von Krauss and Frostbite make their way to the ring accompanied by Bruno. The tag team belts draped over each of The Compton Collossal.)

Andrew Fulton: "There they are in all their glory."

Jeremy Tucker: "You mean their arrogance. The bell rings and this match is underway. Reverend Marsh instructs Psycho to give The KGB holy hell and both Psycho and Cerberus could be giving The KGB just that and then some. Frostbite starts off for his team and Armand just continues to smoke his Egyptian cigarette."

Andrew Fulton: "He has a right to smoke whenever he wants."

Jeremy Tucker: "Not in a match with both the championships and with seedings on the line."

Andrew Fulton: "He's the commissioner now and he gives the orders. Psycho locks up with Frostbite and both crazy wrestlers fail to get any advantage. Frostbite kicks Psycho in the mid-section but Psycho just stares at him. He hits him in the head and Psycho just looks at him unaffected."

Jeremy Tucker: "Never hit a guy who wears a hockey mask and is twice as crazy. Psycho blocks another punch and starts punching Frostbite in the head and face with such ferocity. Frostbite stumbles to his corner and Armand gives him his cellphone while giving him instructions. What is that all about."

Andrew Fulton: "You forget that Armand gives the orders and Frostbite's love is at ringside you don't think that that he cares about her and vice versa. Frostbite and Psycho lock up and he forces Frostbite into a corner and opens up a can of whoop ass and delivers a series of lefts and rights of his own."

Jeremy Tucker: "Psycho tags in Cerberus and they whip him into the ropes and double clothesline Frostbite. Reverend Marsh is holding his copy of The Good Book and shouting passages and instructions. Meanwhile Cerberus is kicking and stomping Frostbite. He picks up Frostbite and bodyslams him with authority."

Andrew Fulton: "Good thing Frostbite gets to his corner and tags in Armand von Krauss who enters the ring cautiously and locks up with Cerberus who easily forces him into the corner. Cerberus unleashes a relentless series of chops that resound right through the arena."

Jeremy Tucker: "I think that hurt Armand as much as it did the ringsiders ears maybe even more than it did to the ringsiders. He whips Armand into the opposite corner and charges in and executes a vicious and violent clothesline."

Andrew Fulton: "Reverend Marsh is a cruel and sadistic man of the cloth. He was a mediocre wrestler who couldn't heal anyone even if he had a degree in medicine. He calls me out and sends Donzig to assault me."

Jeremy Tucker: "He had nothing to do with it."

Andrew Fulton: "Yeah it was a coincidence that he insulted my intelligence and then Donzig assaults me. What a surprise Jerry. Now he's attempting to kill The KGB just to eliminate competition from The Anzac Cup Tournament."

Jeremy Tucker: "So far The Hell Hounds are dominating early in this match up and look impressive. Reverend Marsh is cheering and jogging enthusiastically watching his vow come true. Armand pokes Cerberus in the eyes and hurries to tag in Frostbite."

Andrew Fulton: "Frostbite rushes in and dropkicks his legs. He opens up a can of whoop ass and screams out for his lover and then challenges Psychotic Goth. Hell, The Hell Hounds are in the same level of intelligence as the champion."

Jeremy Tucker: "He's been calling out Psychotic Goth and so was Eddie D. First he has to get by Rally Jackson in the main event. If he does Psychotic Goth is more than willing to grant these two shots at the championship. 'The Cold Hearted Bastard' continues to work on Cerberus' leg and delivers a series of vicious kicks to the back of the head and Reverend Marsh is concerned now."

Andrew Fulton: "Oh he's not so mouthy is he now. Hey, Reverend Marsh, you're not so mouthy now are you that my friends in The KGB are slapping the slobber out of your ugly Hell Hounds. Frostbite tags in Armand and they double suplex the big guy like they were taking out the trash which The Hell Hounds are."

Jeremy Tucker: "Armand continues to work on Cerberus' leg and goes over to Frostbite who gives him his still lit Egyptian cigarette before striding over to Reverend Marsh and flicks the unfinished butt at him arrogantly insulting him in German. Armand wastes no time dropping elbows and cinches in a kneebar and who knows if Cerberus is in pain since he's wearing a hockey mask."

Andrew Fulton: "Cerberus slowly makes his way to the ropes and grabs them. Reverend Marsh hands him a fork and he begins stabbing Armand in the leg repeatedly forcing Armand to release the hold. Frostbite runs along the ring apron and punt kicks him as if he can feel it."

Jeremy Tucker: "Armand stomps on Cerberus and sets the big man up for a German suplex and does it again and a third time before bridging up for a pin that leads to a close two count. He sits up and smirks arrogantly. He whips Cerberus into the corner and delivers a 'Blitzkrieg' to both the body and head of Cerberus."

Andrew Fulton: "Not that he cares since there's nothing in that empty headed skull of his anyway. Cerberus is bleeding and Frostbite sneaks over and starts choking him followed by a headbutt during the distraction. The referee warns Frostbite who just claims that his girlfriend made him do it."

Jeremy Tucker: "Just like it was his imaginary girlfriend's idea to burn my car. Armand whips Cerberus into the ropes and Psycho secretly tags in as Armand clotheslines Cerberus with little or no effect. Psycho rushes in and he smashes Armand with a lamp given to him by a ringsider."

Andrew Fulton: "Who brings a lamp to a wrestling match. Psycho bounds into the ropes and lionsaults holding the lamp and smashes Armand with it. Armand's bleeding badly as Frostbite rushes in and delivers some Sweet Chin Music to Psycho's brainless skull as Armand gets back to his feet."

Jeremy Tucker: "Which gave him time to recover and deliver a few throat punches to Psycho before executing a lung blower. Armand goes for the cover and once again gets a close two count. He mounts Psycho and unleashes a 'Blitzkrieg' as the referee warns him. Armand points to him and warns him and reminds him who he owes his job to and threatens to have him fired."

Andrew Fulton: "With good reason too I might add. Armand full nelson suplex's that crazy fleabag and bridges up for a close three count. Armand tags in Frostbite and he chokeslams that slobbering moron."

Jeremy Tucker: "Frostbite picks up and shouts in Psycho's face. He chokeslams Psycho again and mocks Reverend Marsh who just unleashed a series of unholy curses."

Andrew Fulton: "Burn the Reverend at the stake! Frostbite now delivers a savage ground and pound of his own. He whips Psycho into the corner and clotheslines himself over the ropes onto the ring apron."

Jeremy Tucker: "Frostbite wraps his arm around Psycho's throat and chokes him as Cerberus storms over and pulls him off and savagely headbutts him busting him open. The referee warns him to return to his corner while Armand delivers knife edge chops to Psycho's throat."

Andrew Fulton: "At least the referee is now keeping order due to Armand's reminder. Armand delivers another German suplex and rolls over to make the pin......One.....Two....Th.....No! Psycho gets his arm up."

Jeremy Tucker: "Armand sets Psycho onto the top turnbuckle and attempts a suplerplex but Psycho headbutts him repeatedly and Armand falls off. He flies off the ropes and Superfly headbutts to Armand's head."

Andrew Fulton: "The Hell Hounds are trying to murder Armand because he wouldn't donate money to Reverend Marsh's scam charity. Thank goodness that Armand kicked out at two after that brutal move."

Jeremy Tucker: "Psycho makes his way to his corner and tags in Cerberus who charges and knocks Frostbite off the ring apron and clotheslines Armand. Cerberus sets up Armand as Reverend Marsh lifts up his arms up and yells as Cerberus powerbombs him falling forward headbutting Armand's crotch with that hockey mask."

Andrew Fulton: "Disqualify these savage beasts for possibly keeping him from a romantic evening due to damaged family jewels! Cerberus unleashes a series of knife edges to his throat forcing him into a corner and unleashes a series of devastating knuckle punches. Hey ref where's the warnings or does Armand have to remind you of your job?"

Jeremy Tucker: "He already warned him."

Andrew Fulton: "Laughable excuse to defend that pin striped panty waste."

Jeremy Tucker: "Look who's talking. Armand kicks Cerberus and sets him up for a gutwrench suplex and then calls Bruno who hands him a baseball bat which Armand uses to beat Cerberus before attempting to destroy the hockey mask."

Andrew Fulton: "Well someone has to show how disgustingly ugly they are and Armand's the man to do it. Psycho charges in but the referee forces him back to his corner as Armand cleverly switches with Frostbite who the referee warns him to leave but Frostbite signals that he tagged in."

Jeremy Tucker: "I wonder if his girlfriend is backing him up. Frostbite sets up Cerberus and gutbusters him....."

Andrew Fulton: "That's mangy mutt of a man to you Jerry."

Jeremy Tucker: "He isn't a mangy mutt. Frostbite delivers a backbreaker and makes the cover for a close two count. Now Frostbite uses the baseball bat and calls out for his love and warns Psychotic Goth before continuing to beat Cerberus with the baseball bat."

Andrew Fulton: "See I told you his girlfriend's making him do it. Frostbite tags in Armand and who proceeds to execute a full nelson suplex Cerberus and bridges up for close two count. Armand now delivers a series of vicious double axehandles to Cerberus' back."

Jeremy Tucker: "Armand whips Cerberus into the ropes delivers a running knee before going for the pin for yet a two count. He whips Cerberus into the ropes attempting a clothesline but Cerberus ducks and waits for Armand to turn around and executes a chokeslam."

Andrew Fulton: "Both men are down and the referee is counting them as they start to slowly stir. Armand slowly makes his way to his corner as does Cerberus. Armand tags in Frostbite and cuts Cerberus off. just as he nears his corner."

Jeremy Tucker: "Frostbite starts working on the leg and attempts a Texas Cloverleaf but Cerberus kicks him away. He makes his way to his corner as Frostbite charges and he tags in Psycho who headbutts Frostbite repeatedly before leaving the ring."

Andrew Fulton: "Psycho has a chain and he returns and uses it like a clothesline and he lets Frostbite have it. He uses the chain to clothesline Armand off the ring apron. He whips Frostbite into the ropes and again uses that chain to try and behead Frostbite."

Jeremy Tucker: "At least I can get some satisfaction for his destroying my car. Psycho wraps that chain around his fist and proceeds to pound on Frostbite turning him into a bloody mess demanding his girlfriend save him. Reverend Marsh is screaming Hallejullah, praise the Lord!"

Andrew Fulton: "He would praise his wild animals for torturing the greatest team in the XHF and SWAT. Psycho starts whooping Frostbite with that chain and then wraps that chain around Frostbite's head and throat and drags him around the ring."

Jeremy Tucker: "Psycho tags in Cerberus and he proceeds to drag Frostbite around the ring. He tags in Psycho again and they start brutally beating down Frostbite. Psycho tags in Cerberus again as Reverend Marsh continues to yell instructions like he's performing a sermon and screams things that probably make him lose donations."

Andrew Fulton: "Not to mention getting excommunicated, defrocked and hopefully Frostbite burning him at the stake. Armand storms over and attacks Cerberus with an officially licensed Shootfighter Stainless Steel Singapore Cane. The referee warns him to leave but it bought Frostbite some time to recover."



Jeremy Tucker: "Cerberus is powering out of a full nelson but Armand counters with a face slam. He calls out to Bruno who hands him a golf club and uses it to deliver a hard hole in one shot to Cerberus's crotch and does it again while the referee is distracted."

Andrew Fulton: "Not that Cerberus can feel it. Armand delivers another face smasher and makes the cover for a close three count. He whips Cerberus into the ropes and delivers a flying Superman heart punch. This is it.....One.....Two.....Thr.....No! Cerberus gets an arm up."

Jeremy Tucker: "Cerberus barely survived that pinfall attempt. Armand is beside himself and the referee explains while Armand warns him about his job. Armand grabs a chair from Bruno and proceeds to smash Cerberus' legs before he places Cerberus' neck between the chair seat and stomps away without mercy."

Andrew Fulton: "Justice is being delivered to this murderer. Armand proceeds to go to the top rope and he comes off with a legdrop to the back of the neck of Cerberus who is still trapped in that chair. He rips the chair off of his neck and makes the cover.....One......Two......Thr......No! Cerberus barely gets his shoulder up. Armand's expression is both of shock and anger."

Jeremy Tucker: "That's because he and Frostbite are against a real veteran team. Armand grabs the chain and proceeds to whip Cerberus with that chain as if that's both Tarrasque and Marcus Anderson."

Andrew Fulton: "Why would they do anything to him since they have something in common. Armand's just turned into Frostbite and is beating Cerberus with a bombing run with that chain wrapped around his fist. He continues invoking Tarrasque's and Marcus's names."

Jeremy Tucker: "Let no one say that Armand can't go over the edge like Frostbite. Armand tags in Frostbite who has a pane of glass which he puts into a corner and both proceed to double whip Cerberus into that pain of glass. He goes face first into the pane of glass shattering it."

Andrew Fulton: "For Cerberus that's probably a frat party game. Frostbite uses one of the large shards and he proceeds to carve his girlfriend's name into Cerberus and then pulls at the hockey mask to carve his head up. Obviously he's obsessed with leaving his girlfriend's name everywhere."

Jeremy Tucker: "Like everyone needs to be reminded of his poor excuse to burn things including my car. Frostbite whips Cerberus into the opposite corner and charges in but Cerberus counters with a big boot followed by a Russian sickle out of the corner and both men are down."

Andrew Fulton: "The referee is counting them both as they stir and are attempting to get to their corners to tag out. Armand tags in as Cerberus reaches his corner but Armand grabs him and pulls him away. Cerberus attempts to kick him away but Armand hags on tenaciously."

Jeremy Tucker: "Armand drops a series of vicious elbows before attempting a figure four leglock.....Cerberus small packages Armand for a close three count. Cerberus barely gets to his corner and tags Psycho in."

Andrew Fulton: "Psycho charges in and he clotheslines Armand and punches Frostbite hard enough in the eyebrow busting him open near that area with that spiked collar. He does the same with Armand who is cut in the same area."

Jeremy Tucker: "Psycho whips Armand into the ropes and spears him hard out of those high priced shoes of him. He goes for the cover but Frostbite saves the match for his team and executes a shoulder breaker before leaving."

Andrew Fulton: "Armand takes advantage of Frostbite's little intervention and cinches in a Fujiwara armbar. He wrenches upwards applying pressure on that arm as Psycho attempts to get to the ropes."

Jeremy Tucker: "Armand just turned it into a Crippler Crossface and he has that submission hold in quite tight and he's pulling back quite relentlessly. Psycho manages to roll his way to the ropes and Armand continues to apply the hold until the five count."

Andrew Fulton: "Armand's being too kind to those Hellhounds. Armand waits for Psycho to get up and chokes him on the ropes while continuing to milk the count. Reverend Marsh is shouting condemnation before Armand spits at him. That ought to teach that religious reject to respect the KGB."

Jeremy Tucker: "That's typical of Armand's M.O. First he tries to kill Tarrasque and Marcus Anderson for some unknown reason other than his trying to own Tarrasque. Now he's trying to kill The Hellhounds and disrespects a man of the cloth and faith."

Andrew Fulton: "You tell me to be respectful to that moron and then you insult him. Armand is calling out to Bruno who comes over and hands him a cattle prod. Frostbite distracts the referee while he uses it first on Psycho and then on the charging Cerberus the referee turns and sees Armand using the cattle prod. He warns him as he takes the cattle prod that he'll DQ The KGB. Armand warns the referee that he owes his job to him. He ignores the referee as he should be doing as he puts the boots to Psycho."

Jeremy Tucker: "That's typical of the bullying tactics and the thuggery The KGB employs just to win a match. They would do anything and go to any lengths to win matches and retain their tag titles against good teams like The Hellhounds."

Andrew Fulton: "That's brainless, empty headed and lice and disease carrying Hellhounds to you. Armand drags that disease carrying to his corner and Frostbite tags in and they open up a double can of whoop ass. Cerberus has seen enough and charges over only to be restrained and forced to return to his corner."

Jeremy Tucker: "Frostbite calls out to Bruno who hands him a piece of piece of that pane of glass and starts carving his name on Psycho's body and pulls the mask down enough to carve Psycho's head up. He screams his girlfriend's name."

Andrew Fulton: "Come on Frostbite do me a favor and carve up Donzig for what he did to me. Avenge me future SWAT World Heavyweight Champion for what he did to me."

Jeremy Tucker: "Get on your knees all you want but it won't be granted."

Andrew Fulton: "Oh you'd like that won't you. We all know the commissioner's going to look the other way. Frostbite delivers a series of vicious headbutts to the back of his head and picks up that chain and proceeds to whip Psycho like the vicious rabid dog that he really is. That should be that bully Donzig's punishment as well."

Jeremy Tucker: "Frostbite whips Psycho into the ropes and ducks a clothesline. He comes off the opposite ropes and he spears Frostbite and both are laid out on the canvas as the referee checks and starts counting them."

Andrew Fulton: "There goes the Reverend Marsh jumping up and down urging Psycho to tag out as if he doesn't now that already. The referee continues the count as they both start to stir and slowly make their way to their corners. Frostbite makes the tag s Reverend Marsh gets away with pulling Psycho to his corner who tags in Cerberus who storms in and clotheslines Frostbite and then Armand."

Jeremy Tucker: "Cerberus delivers another set of clotheslines to both KGB members. He tosses Frostbite out and then whips Armand into the opposite corner and trainwrecks him. He sees Frostbite comeback in and whips him into the opposite corner and delivers a trainwreck. He continues to do that for a second and third time before howling and delivers a gore to Frostbite and to Armand."

Andrew Fulton: "Yeah and Cerberus just happens to howl again and his breath smells like rotten meat. Cerberus whips Armand into the opposite corner and storms in with another trainwreck before delivering another brutal beatdown."

Jeremy Tucker: "Frostbite just got handed a gas can from under the ring apron and opens the cap. He chases the Reverend Marsh around screaming his girlfriend's name and splashes him with it. He turns and does the same with Psycho as Cerberus goes after him and suffers the same fate."

Andrew Fulton: "The Hellhounds are about to experience real life hell as Frostbite is going set them both on fire and burn them down. Armand hits Cerberus with a pair of brass knuckles to the back of the head and The KGB throws him back into the ring. Armand calls to Bruno who hands them the belts Oh this is goin to be soooooooo good."

Jeremy Tucker: "The referee warns Frostbite to leave to leave the ring and reluctantly does. Armand gets into his face before tagging in Frostbite."

Andrew Fulton: "Now Frostbite gets into Cerberus as payback and he takes his belt and starts beating Cerberus with it."

Jeremy Tucker: "That's a disgrace to these prestigious tag belts. Frostbite tags Armand back in and he does the same with his tag belt."

Andrew Tucker: "That's called a technicality besides they wanted a tag title shot at the SWAT World Tag Team Championships and now they're getting what they deserve. This is going to be their only title shot and they aren't proving to be worthy of it. Frostbite storms over and gives Psycho his only look at the gold as he knocks him off the ring apron."

Jeremy Tucker: "Armand's signalling the end with a cutthroat gesture and Frostbite comes over with two chairs which are wrapped with the championship belts. Cerberus gets up slowly and a bit wobbly as The KGB delivers a double concerto."

Andrew Fulton: "In a loud 'G' for gold as Armand makes the cover and double underhooks the leg......One.....Two.....Three."

Frank Salazar: "Your winners at 15minutes and still SWAT World Tag Team Champions Armand von Krauss and Frostbite The KGB."

Jeremy Tucker: "The KGB are victorious and remain SWAT World Tag Team Champions in the most disgusting and disrespectful manner using their tag team championships in the most despicable manner."

Andrew Fulton: "They were simply sending a message to the whole locker room warning everyone of what's to come in The Anzac Cup. Plus they showed why they deserve respect in the locker room."

Jeremy Tucker: "If they pull what they did tonight. SWAT will be hanging it's head in shame and The Anzac Cup Tournament could be no more. Right now let's go to a break but we'll return with more great SWAT action after this commercial break."

(The scene fades to commercials.)

[Isabel Rios]

We open in the locker room, an exhausted looking Isabel Rios seated on a steel folding chair, staring down at the Amazons championship in her hands. In the background the show is still going on; people in the hallway outside, the murmurs of the crowd between matches. Isabel hears none of it, just looking down at her newly won title, a tired smile spreading across her face. A knock at the door and Isabel calls out for whoever it is to come in. Warren W. Webber pokes his head inside.

WWW: “Isabel, can we get a quick interview?”

Without looking up, Isabel shakes her head.

Rios: “No thanks.”

Webber stops, a bit surprised and Isabel looks up at him after a second, gesturing for him to stop before he can turn to leave.

Rios: “Warren, sorry, hold on. You just caught me kinda… overwhelmed, y’know? Gimme a sec here.”

Warren nods and Isabel stands, glancing in a mirror before opting to just grab a black High Voltage snapback and pull that on instead of trying to do something with her disheveled hair. She moves to stand next to Warren, her freshly captured prize slung over her shoulder. Isabel gives Warren a little nod, still smiling.

WWW: “We’re here with the newly crowned Amazons champion Isabel Rios. Isabel, how are you feeling?”

Rios: “Tired. Beat up. Sore. Exhausted. In need of a shower, a cheeseburger, sleep and a massage, ideally in that order. But most of all Warren? Ecstatic. Absolutely ecstatic. Because I’m the champ.”

She’s broken into a full on grin now, as if saying the magic words brought it all truly home for her.

WWW: “Nicole Anderson put up an incredible fight-”

Rios: “Nicole Anderson and I kicked the shit out of each other.”

WWW: “Right. The end of the match, you opted not to go for a cover after the Redtail Driver and went for the Koji Clutch instead. What was going through your head in that moment? Were you looking to inflict more punishment?”

Rios: “What? No, absolutely not. Honestly, I thought she might kick out if I went for the pin. That woman is tough and she made it clear she wasn’t laying down tonight. She wasn’t gonna be pinned and she wasn’t gonna tap. I had to choke her unconscious to win my belt. All the credit in the world to her.”

WWW: “Do you think she deserves a rematch?”

Rios: “I think anyone who defends the belt the way she did, who fights the way she fought, deserves a rematch. I have no doubt she’ll get it sooner or later.”

WWW: “And what about the rest of the SWAT women’s roster?”

Rios: “I’m going to be a fighting champion. I said it before, I’ll say it again. I’m taking this belt to NPW and I’ll defend it there. I’m here in SWAT and I’ll defend it here. You want a shot? Line’s to the left, you all figure out who’s in what order and I’ll bring the gold.”

WWW: “Congrats again on your win tonight, champ.”

Rios is all grins.

Rios: “Thanks Warren. Now take off so I can shower, eh?”

The interviewer nods, returning her smile before heading for the door as Isabel takes the belt in her hands again, looking at it once more as the shot fades out.