Post by Timeless on Jul 2, 2021 19:36:45 GMT -5
[Cold open to Roxylishus laughing hysterically. She is wearing a brand new Prime Time boob tube and them mountain melons are jiggling all over the place with her laughter.]
Timeless : What’s so funny?
Roxylishus : Just saw the Big debut of the Pirates.
Timeless : Come on, that ghost and ferry to Canada tripe wasn’t that funny. Quite disappointing actually if you ask me for some group that was ohhh so heralded coming in.
Roxylishus : I know. That’s what’s sooo funny. Then, they do ONE move on Eddie D and think …. ‘ina heartbeat NPW became theirs’.
Timeless : (scoffs and looks into the camera) Let me let you in on a little secret Pirates. Gus Arnold, he is easily distracted. See’s something new and he is like a kid with a shiny new toy.
We have seen these new toys come, and then go here before.
First the Syndicate came to town after I called that turd Dane out to force him to show his face, they had a head of steam and were ploughing thru the also rans here, then, ran into the real power. They were found lacking and ran for greener pastures.
Then there were the ReVs. Wowwwwww.
[Does hand motions mocking being scared.]
Came in from AWF like they were something special. A few sneak attacks, you know, the norm. Like what you clowns just did.
Then, the bell rings.
That’s when Sir Winsalot gives them a wake up call and good old Primal jumped on board for the ride.
Enter Shockwave. Same old story.
You know what, when the bell rings and you get in the ring with ‘Mr. I Don’t Give a Fuck’ you’ll be found lacking just like all the rest, just like that embarrassing debut.
Roxylishus : (Spice girls singing voice) So what you think about that?
[Timeless runs a hand thru his flowing locks. They are in front of a NPW banner by the way. He has one half of the Imperial Tag Team Championships draped over his shoulder, is wearing his ‘Born to Fuck’ t-shirt and looks like a rock star. The Imperial march plays in the background for a moment at the mention of the Imperial belts.]
Roxylishus : Did you see Jay Jay and Hunter shake hands after their match? He ….
Timeless : He was damn lucky to get that win, let me tell you. Shake his hand? He should kiss his foot and Lady Lucks also.
And he can kiss my ass while he is at it!
He fell over and woke up a winner.
That guy really grates my nerve. Tell you what Jay Jay (he emphasis the name speaking it like the term of a vagina). Get your new buddy Hunter … go see Gus and come play with Prime Time! After we are done with The Speed Dragons, and you are finished losing again at your latest attempt to be relevant outside of NPW. We will gladly defend these belts against you!
We will defend them against ANYONE!
Roxylishus : And not some hokey pokey battle royal either like he managed to orchestrate to help save him from looking up at the lights to us when you won the belts from them!
Timeless : Nah. We don’t play that shit. (Does a Randy Savage voice) You win ‘em in the ring and you lose ‘em in the ring.
Roxylishus : (also does a Savage impersonation) Ohhhh Yeah!
Who are the Speed Dragons anyway?
Timeless : I’ll tell you who they are. They are about to become a foot note in history. A Trivia question that will be some obscure retro thing years from now. They will forever be now known as … ‘The 1st team Prime Time defended the belts against.’
First of MANY!
Not like that runt LD. Gets scheduled a first defence against one of the Dark Star’s … and three matches later still hasn’t beaten him. THREE!!!! Niko!
Roxylishus : How embarrassment.
Timeless : You know, when he won the belt from Dane, I actually thought great, now I can finally get my shot without that punk ass ducking me, but it appears not to be the case sadly.
Roxylishus : Well, you have been busy.
Timeless : Yeah, kicking the ReVs ass and forming the hottest tag team on the Network. I know.
But that cat still has one coming to him courtesy of Sir Winsalot! He ran his mouth about me for a year now and just like Dane, hasn’t done a god dammed thing. Step Up or Step OFF!
Roxylishus : (going into interviewer mode) There you have it NPW!
Sir Winsalot putting … I don’t know … half the fed on notice.
Speed Dragons, I hope ….
Timeless : Speed Dragons!
Run! Run to Lloyds of London and get yourself a nice insurance policy. Make sure it includes disability. You’re going to need it.
Roxylishus : Any parting words for the fans?
Timeless : I am the Ultimate Male Supreme!
Every breathing woman’s wet dream!
A god damn wrestling machine!
Roxylishus : Swish swish mutha fuckas.
Timeless : What’s so funny?
Roxylishus : Just saw the Big debut of the Pirates.
Timeless : Come on, that ghost and ferry to Canada tripe wasn’t that funny. Quite disappointing actually if you ask me for some group that was ohhh so heralded coming in.
Roxylishus : I know. That’s what’s sooo funny. Then, they do ONE move on Eddie D and think …. ‘ina heartbeat NPW became theirs’.
Timeless : (scoffs and looks into the camera) Let me let you in on a little secret Pirates. Gus Arnold, he is easily distracted. See’s something new and he is like a kid with a shiny new toy.
We have seen these new toys come, and then go here before.
First the Syndicate came to town after I called that turd Dane out to force him to show his face, they had a head of steam and were ploughing thru the also rans here, then, ran into the real power. They were found lacking and ran for greener pastures.
Then there were the ReVs. Wowwwwww.
[Does hand motions mocking being scared.]
Came in from AWF like they were something special. A few sneak attacks, you know, the norm. Like what you clowns just did.
Then, the bell rings.
That’s when Sir Winsalot gives them a wake up call and good old Primal jumped on board for the ride.
Enter Shockwave. Same old story.
You know what, when the bell rings and you get in the ring with ‘Mr. I Don’t Give a Fuck’ you’ll be found lacking just like all the rest, just like that embarrassing debut.
Roxylishus : (Spice girls singing voice) So what you think about that?
[Timeless runs a hand thru his flowing locks. They are in front of a NPW banner by the way. He has one half of the Imperial Tag Team Championships draped over his shoulder, is wearing his ‘Born to Fuck’ t-shirt and looks like a rock star. The Imperial march plays in the background for a moment at the mention of the Imperial belts.]
Roxylishus : Did you see Jay Jay and Hunter shake hands after their match? He ….
Timeless : He was damn lucky to get that win, let me tell you. Shake his hand? He should kiss his foot and Lady Lucks also.
And he can kiss my ass while he is at it!
He fell over and woke up a winner.
That guy really grates my nerve. Tell you what Jay Jay (he emphasis the name speaking it like the term of a vagina). Get your new buddy Hunter … go see Gus and come play with Prime Time! After we are done with The Speed Dragons, and you are finished losing again at your latest attempt to be relevant outside of NPW. We will gladly defend these belts against you!
We will defend them against ANYONE!
Roxylishus : And not some hokey pokey battle royal either like he managed to orchestrate to help save him from looking up at the lights to us when you won the belts from them!
Timeless : Nah. We don’t play that shit. (Does a Randy Savage voice) You win ‘em in the ring and you lose ‘em in the ring.
Roxylishus : (also does a Savage impersonation) Ohhhh Yeah!
Who are the Speed Dragons anyway?
Timeless : I’ll tell you who they are. They are about to become a foot note in history. A Trivia question that will be some obscure retro thing years from now. They will forever be now known as … ‘The 1st team Prime Time defended the belts against.’
First of MANY!
Not like that runt LD. Gets scheduled a first defence against one of the Dark Star’s … and three matches later still hasn’t beaten him. THREE!!!! Niko!
Roxylishus : How embarrassment.
Timeless : You know, when he won the belt from Dane, I actually thought great, now I can finally get my shot without that punk ass ducking me, but it appears not to be the case sadly.
Roxylishus : Well, you have been busy.
Timeless : Yeah, kicking the ReVs ass and forming the hottest tag team on the Network. I know.
But that cat still has one coming to him courtesy of Sir Winsalot! He ran his mouth about me for a year now and just like Dane, hasn’t done a god dammed thing. Step Up or Step OFF!
Roxylishus : (going into interviewer mode) There you have it NPW!
Sir Winsalot putting … I don’t know … half the fed on notice.
Speed Dragons, I hope ….
Timeless : Speed Dragons!
Run! Run to Lloyds of London and get yourself a nice insurance policy. Make sure it includes disability. You’re going to need it.
Roxylishus : Any parting words for the fans?
Timeless : I am the Ultimate Male Supreme!
Every breathing woman’s wet dream!
A god damn wrestling machine!
Roxylishus : Swish swish mutha fuckas.
