Chumbucket

[Kyle]

All white sterile room.

White vanity with mirror. Matching white cushioned stool.

Scratched into a corner of the mirror is the word Lynx. Seated with his back to the camera, Keith Williams is dressed in an all white Gucci suit, the straps of his Mueller face guard visible.

Keith Williams: "Shockwave. July 1st. The ReVenants earned our way into the finals to determine the first team to hold the XHF Trios Championships, guaranteeing an appearance at Night of Champions. Keith Williams, Rob Garcia, and Neo James Carner should only have two teams to worry about at the upcoming PPV, but... We don't. Along came a group and that group was unceremoniously interjected into the three team title match to make it four teams."

Sighing as he clutches the sides of his head, Williams unloads on his opponents.

Keith Williams: "Galactic Sex Pirates. The Bastards. I don't care what name you go by. You shouldn't be occupying a ring with The ReVenants in NPW or at a XHF Network event. Are you naive enough to think lightning will strike twice? That you'll repeat what occurred at Call to Arms? Think again, mateys."

Those scurvy dogs are gonna get what's coming to 'em.

Keith Williams: "You may have your sea legs, or space legs, but you aren't ready for the choppy sea you're approaching. You clearly haven't done your homework heading into all of this and that's obvious. That's okay, you're gonna get caught up real quick. Since you haven't done much except pal around, it's going to be fun kicking each and every one of your ridiculous asses."

Free colonoscopies via Keith's foot!

Keith Williams: "Whichever three goof combination you send to Night of Champions, they're getting crushed. Unfortunately for Rob Riot and Frank Windsor, they're first to get their heads knocked in. They've had their say and it was... Insufficient."

Clicking his tongue, Keith doesn't seem impressed.

Keith Williams: "A DiCaprio joke? Some racist nonsense? Keith name shaming? Dissing Led Zeppelin??!!"

Waving off the barely barbed jabs, Williams offers his review.

Keith Williams: "Pathetic."

Gazing into the mirror, the Great White Terror further expresses his disappointment.

Keith Williams: "None of what you've said or done has been original. A lecture regarding what the definition of a revenant is? Been there, heard that, wasn't thrilled. Give me something to chew on, boys. What you're serving is weak. Regrettably, you should NEVER have mentioned my..."

Keith runs his fingers over the area on his face where a mustache used to occupy. Drawn in is the same sharpie mustache that he added to the mask.

Keith Williams: "My..."

Gripped by emotion and loss, KW struggles to say it.

Keith Williams: "Missing appendage."

Locked in eye contact with himself, Keith continues to talk in a monotone.

Keith Williams: "You couldn't have known; you haven't watched any of NPW's shows. You aren't "savvy" to what Eron Hunter... Did."

Briefly glancing at the letters etched into the mirror, Williams returns to staring at his reflection.

Keith Williams: "It doesn't have to be explained how and why a great white shark is dangerous. The same can be said for me. Actions speak louder than words and I'll let what I do to both of you define my character."

They're gonna need a bigger boat.

Keith Williams: "Windsor, you were more appealing with the bear costume on. You should make it a permanent addition to your act, otherwise I doubt what you're doing will get far. Out of shape loser that carries around a random world title and chain curses, huh? Engrossing! Well, mostly gross. You're in denial regarding the fat, lazy slob that you are. Let me help you find acceptance, maybe cut off a slab of fatback and start the weight loss. At least you have a partner to do the lion's share of the heavy lifting for your team, otherwise you'd be more fucked than you already are."

Sneering, Keith addresses the other half of the team he's facing.

Keith Williams: "The dead weight you're carrying has to be more than you can handle, Rob. What do you get out of it? Is Frank that near and dear of a friend? You can see it, can't you? He's a selfish fat fuck that cares more about himself and eating than anything else. He has an excuse for EVERYTHING. Windsor doesn't understand accountability, so he'll always shift the blame in any direction he can. That's what people like him are best at."

Williams tuts as he slowly shakes his head, disapproving of Frank Windsor's work ethic.

Keith Williams: "The pandemic didn't prevent The ReVenants from wrestling. I've been acquiring titles and elevating multiple promotions in the XHF for months while others would rather take it easy, accepting handouts."

Unconscionable! Unforgivable! Unfathomable!

Keith Williams: "Riot. Windsor. You're vastly underestimating what you're up against, expecting you can kill what's already died and come back to life. The ignorance you've exhibited is only going to lead to your downfall. This match? It's a taste of what's to come. After Keith Williams and Rob Garcia beat you, we'll be joined by Neo James Carner and then we'll beat you again to claim the titles created for us. Mutiny and marooning, that'll be the only thing left for you to do. The ReVenants are derailing your hype train before it has a chance to leave the station!"

Hop overboard, the ship is set to sink! Divide the treasure, grab some hardtack, and pray there's nothing in the water that's hungry.

Keith Williams: "July 15th and July 25th. In front of everyone. It'll be twofold established that our Rob is better than your Rob!"

Fade to black.