Post by Mongo the Destroyer on Jul 30, 2021 21:43:23 GMT -5
*The camera opens on Lord Dominicus, the NPW North American Double Crown Champion, on the phone. Soon we go to a split screen as a shadowy figure takes up the other half.*
Person: Hello, you’ve reached the offices of ICE, Tae speaking
LD: Oh thank goodness, I’ve been trying to get through forever. Can I speak to your manager?
ICE Tae: Well actually you’re in luck, I’m the owner of ICE.
LD: Owner? Wow, privatization really is getting out of hand. Anyway! I’ve been trying to get your attention for weeks now about this stable of four people-
ICE Tae: Ooooh! I know who you are! You’re the guy who’s sent like twenty emails-
LD: Yes
ICE Tae: ….ten letters-
LD: Yeah
ICE Tae: ….and five telegrams, I didn’t even knew that those still existed
LD: Don’t forget the candygram, I figured some sweets would loosen things up.
ICE Tae: …Yeah, alright. Well I want to say that I am curious about these…
*He digs through some papers on his desk, also shadowy*
ICE Tae: …illegal aliens?
LD: Illegal time-traveling aliens.
ICE Tae: Yes, yes. And you say they’re friends of yours?
LD: No! I mean… Well I thought they were. See, they named their dog after me out of respect, which was really cool. But then Niko and his pals screwed me out of the NPW North American Cruiserweight Championship leaving me with only the NPW North American Double Crown Championship. And he keeps saying it isn’t personal but at the same time he seems really upset with me so maybe it is? Thank goodness life isn’t like Facebook so I don’t need to mark our relationship, am I right?
ICE Tae: I see I see, so you called me up because you’d like to get your frenemies out of your hair then?
LD: Well when you say it like that it sounds petty and cowardly. But yes.
*Tae is taking notes, which is hard to tell due to the shadows across him and his desk but we can sort of make it out from the outline*
ICE Tae: And you say they wrestle?
LD: Yes. I’ve wrestled against Niko like three times now and haven’t been able to overcome him. It’s really frustrating honestly. And now I’m scheduled to face him at August on the Atlantic and honestly it’d just be easier for all of us if you guys would just move in and snag him before that.
ICE Tae: I see, interesting.
LD: Interesting enough to come pick up Niko and his pack of ne’er-do-wells?
ICE Tae: I mean, we don’t usually pick people up, we let them handle travel
LD: That seems incredibly inefficient. What if they don’t come willingly?
ICE Tae: You’d be surprised, Mr….
*He checks his notes*
ICE Tae: ….Dominicus
LD: Lord, Lord Dominicus. But really?
ICE Tae: Oh yeah, ICE is becoming a really hot destination, we’re even thinking of adding that to the posters
LD: Wow, America has changed a lot since I moved to Canada
ICE Tae: Oh yeah, it’s a new world nowadays and there’s a lot of opportunities
LD: So hypothetically speaking, if you do get your hands on Niko and crew, what are you gonna do, lock them up in a cage or something?
ICE Tae: Well it depends on the situation, but we do have a cage
LD: Oh excellent, these guys are very dangerous.
*There’s a pause as Tae thinks.*
ICE Tae: Look I’ll tell you what. When’s this show you’re facing Niko at?
LD: August on the Atlantic? August 4th.
*He writes down the date*
ICE Tae: Aright, why do I swing up north there and come see you guys then?
LD: Really?
ICE Tae: Yeah, shouldn’t be a problem. I’ve heard good things about NPW.
LD: Oh thank goodness, now I can stop sending letters to Interpol
ICE Tae: What?
LD: Nothing. Thank you. Come see us August 4th, I guarantee you’ll have A REALLY EVIL TIME!
ICE Tae: (Is that a good thing?)
LD: Yes.
ICE Tae: Alright, cool. See you then! Thanks for calling!
*LD hangs up and we return to a single screen, but instead of THE DARK LORD OF NPW it’s THE SHADOWY FIGURE KNOWN AS TAE. He strokes his chin.*
ICE Tae: A stable of time traveling aliens? It’s a little out of this world, but I bet the fans of Interesting Combat Entertainment could get behind that. Yessssss
*He continues to ShadowThink about the potential in promoting this posse s the camera fades out.*
Person: Hello, you’ve reached the offices of ICE, Tae speaking
LD: Oh thank goodness, I’ve been trying to get through forever. Can I speak to your manager?
ICE Tae: Well actually you’re in luck, I’m the owner of ICE.
LD: Owner? Wow, privatization really is getting out of hand. Anyway! I’ve been trying to get your attention for weeks now about this stable of four people-
ICE Tae: Ooooh! I know who you are! You’re the guy who’s sent like twenty emails-
LD: Yes
ICE Tae: ….ten letters-
LD: Yeah
ICE Tae: ….and five telegrams, I didn’t even knew that those still existed
LD: Don’t forget the candygram, I figured some sweets would loosen things up.
ICE Tae: …Yeah, alright. Well I want to say that I am curious about these…
*He digs through some papers on his desk, also shadowy*
ICE Tae: …illegal aliens?
LD: Illegal time-traveling aliens.
ICE Tae: Yes, yes. And you say they’re friends of yours?
LD: No! I mean… Well I thought they were. See, they named their dog after me out of respect, which was really cool. But then Niko and his pals screwed me out of the NPW North American Cruiserweight Championship leaving me with only the NPW North American Double Crown Championship. And he keeps saying it isn’t personal but at the same time he seems really upset with me so maybe it is? Thank goodness life isn’t like Facebook so I don’t need to mark our relationship, am I right?
ICE Tae: I see I see, so you called me up because you’d like to get your frenemies out of your hair then?
LD: Well when you say it like that it sounds petty and cowardly. But yes.
*Tae is taking notes, which is hard to tell due to the shadows across him and his desk but we can sort of make it out from the outline*
ICE Tae: And you say they wrestle?
LD: Yes. I’ve wrestled against Niko like three times now and haven’t been able to overcome him. It’s really frustrating honestly. And now I’m scheduled to face him at August on the Atlantic and honestly it’d just be easier for all of us if you guys would just move in and snag him before that.
ICE Tae: I see, interesting.
LD: Interesting enough to come pick up Niko and his pack of ne’er-do-wells?
ICE Tae: I mean, we don’t usually pick people up, we let them handle travel
LD: That seems incredibly inefficient. What if they don’t come willingly?
ICE Tae: You’d be surprised, Mr….
*He checks his notes*
ICE Tae: ….Dominicus
LD: Lord, Lord Dominicus. But really?
ICE Tae: Oh yeah, ICE is becoming a really hot destination, we’re even thinking of adding that to the posters
LD: Wow, America has changed a lot since I moved to Canada
ICE Tae: Oh yeah, it’s a new world nowadays and there’s a lot of opportunities
LD: So hypothetically speaking, if you do get your hands on Niko and crew, what are you gonna do, lock them up in a cage or something?
ICE Tae: Well it depends on the situation, but we do have a cage
LD: Oh excellent, these guys are very dangerous.
*There’s a pause as Tae thinks.*
ICE Tae: Look I’ll tell you what. When’s this show you’re facing Niko at?
LD: August on the Atlantic? August 4th.
*He writes down the date*
ICE Tae: Aright, why do I swing up north there and come see you guys then?
LD: Really?
ICE Tae: Yeah, shouldn’t be a problem. I’ve heard good things about NPW.
LD: Oh thank goodness, now I can stop sending letters to Interpol
ICE Tae: What?
LD: Nothing. Thank you. Come see us August 4th, I guarantee you’ll have A REALLY EVIL TIME!
ICE Tae: (Is that a good thing?)
LD: Yes.
ICE Tae: Alright, cool. See you then! Thanks for calling!
*LD hangs up and we return to a single screen, but instead of THE DARK LORD OF NPW it’s THE SHADOWY FIGURE KNOWN AS TAE. He strokes his chin.*
ICE Tae: A stable of time traveling aliens? It’s a little out of this world, but I bet the fans of Interesting Combat Entertainment could get behind that. Yessssss
*He continues to ShadowThink about the potential in promoting this posse s the camera fades out.*
