Post by Dave D-Flipz on Aug 5, 2021 9:47:39 GMT -5
“DOOFENSHMIRTZ EVIL INCORPORATED!!”
*We open up on the balcony of the building you see in the video above. And you hear the song in the video below, the role of the female in the video is being represented in this instance by a computer screen with Brie Mason, who is not a freemason, on the screen, the voice is just Doof being pitched up … like half an octave, to sound more … I dunno what that is he sounds like. And the role of Doof is of course being played by our eldritch empowered version of the financial backer and leader of the Angry Mad Chemists, Dr. Heinz Doofenshmirtz.*
"Love was once a crazy dream, Now it's my new evil scheme. And I'm as happy as can be! It's the age-old story.
How an evil boy meets an evil girl, We got a love strong enough to rule the whole wide world, We both maniacally laugh at all the same stuff, I found my other half, yes, I got an evil love!
When our robot armies march to the beating of our hearts, I'm as happy as can be! It's the age-old story.
How an evil boy meets an evil girl, We got a love strong enough to rule the whole, wide world We both maniacally laugh at all the same stuff, You can't foil a plan that's built upon evil love!"
*The door bursts open and onto the balcony steps the driver of the AMC, William Lastname and his oh so juicy behind.*
"Why hello William! Isn’t it glorious? We won the race and now I will win the heart of my evil love Brie Mason! *he zones out* Who is not a freemason! *he shakes it off* Huh … that’s new."
"Heinz we need to talk. Ovi, Ian, and I have some concerns about this new plan and the new inventions you’ve been coming up with."
"*SIGH* Oh very well Billy, let’s go inside so you don’t have to worry your pretty red labcoat. You’re driving a champion chemistruckinator! I can’t have you doubting my plans. Let’s talk about my plans. I mean, it’s like my favorite thing to do anyway, especially to an audience!"
*We crash cut to the meeting room within the evil lair of the AMC located in the tri-state area. Ovi and Ian are sitting at the table. They are looking over some files. Notably it seems the indoctrinator has been off as Ian is not dripping with sweat into his mechanic overalls and Ovi’s moustache hasn’t assaulted him with his own weapons designs.*
"Don’t you SEE Brundle? It’s glorious. I need it. I must encase it in a robot and use it to power the robot. With a power source that small, adorable, and FAMOUS … I could create a robot that would DESTROY THE HEDGEHOG! BAHAHAHAHAHA!"
"I, uh, think you seem to be, um, forgetting the seven foot elephant … in the room yes? In the room? I can think of forty-two good, um … REASONS … reasons yes? … Reasons to avoid trying to kidnap um, a, uh … kitten."
"BAH! I have never had an issue thwarting the big, strong, dopey type. It’s the speedy, sarcastic, annoying things that foil my plans Ian. That Tiny Fur is the animal powered robit equivalent to a nuclear reactor! A flicky or a Mobian cat is just not up to that level of power! Surely Doof has a way we can steal the cat. Would our indoctrinator work on the cat? Could it be coerced into making MAD CHEMISTRY with me!?"
"I would, uh, be less … concerned … um … if the Indoctrinator was the reason for your sudden obsession. We need to focus on uh … the uh … problems at hand? Yes? Before making new ones?"
*The door opens and William walks in and sits at the table… his butt promptly deflates with a deafening PFFFFFRRRRRRRRRRRTTTTT! Ah see the room is shielded! That makes sense. Doof then barges in!*
"GENTLEMEN! BEHOLD! OUR NEWEST WEAPON IN THE RACE TO WIN RACES AND THE HEARTS OF BRIE MASON! … who is not a free mason …"
*He holds up a small tesla coil looking machine.*
"We mount this to the chemistruckinator and now we have a targeted, RACE LEGAL, indoctinator!"
"That’s our issue Heinz. You put the specs for the machine in the safety and car spec sheets! I’m concerned that since we can only have one active at a time that the announcers and maybe other teams will REALIZE what’s been going on and turn against us! Or worse! What if they find out that this machine causes all kinds of side effects! You remember the whole furor over the burns the doof floof caused at first! You are revealing a LOT to the public! The plan was progressing quite well in secret! You could have lied and called it a … laser pointer meant to blind the racers and let it do it’s subtle brain bending behind the scenes!"
"GASP! Ovi that is against the rules! We may be evil but we aren’t cheaters!"
*They all just look at him and blink …*
"REEEEEEEEEE!"
*the voice booms out from the speakers in the room.*
"Oh shush, it’s not cheating if every other team in the racing league has some kind of supernatural horror in it! Have you SEEN those turtles? Or that beetle with the ram rod? THAT should be illegal."
"Heinz we are, uh, concerned. Your newfound chaos magic power stuff is uh, going to your head. You’ve made a great error … in um … doubting … that life will find a way … to screw with us! The fly … FLY … in the um … ointment, ointment so to speak, the fly is … public perception is a big part of our um … surge in … ratings and rankings! The money and fame uh … very much furthers our goals! You are going to blow it with this reveal of classified information. Hehe."
"Besides, this mounted version will be targeting people with concentrated blasts, who KNOWS what side effects it will have on the targets. Sure they will STRONGLY feel the influence of the ray and may avoid attacking us or let us get away with stuff, but as soon as the ray is not trained on them they will see the results. I think it’s a bad idea. I don’t want to be mauled by a seven foot moon monster, an eldritch horror car, a ghost car, a ninja turtle, a topless dude, a sorority sister, or worst of all … the nerdy furries."
*He shudders, flashbacks to school and the rise to his evil prominence cause him to shed a manly evil tear.*
"Well then we will need security at the home base won’t we. BEHOLD … my NEWEST invention … the BURNINATOR!"
*The three other men all smile and perk up. That sounds like a devastating chemical weapon! Something real to defend themselves with! And now they are feeli… and it’s instantly deflated when a roar is heard and into the room bursts this:
*
"RRRAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWRRRRRRRR"
"Mommy’s very angry …"
"DOOF WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?!"
*The man … er … dragon-man … er … maybe it’s just a dragon … with a beefy arm which looks good coming out of the back of his neck there … begins to breathe fire and burninate the whole conference room. But look at all his majesty! Such consummate v’s!*
"DOOF you’ve created a monstrosity! That isn’t science! What urged you to spawn a … wingaling dragon?"
"He’s the BURNINATOR! I call him Trogdor. He’s going to be my pet and gift to Brie Mason! … who isn’t a free mason."
*Doof shakes his head and breathes in his hand and sniffs it, why does he keep saying that? The other three all run from the room to reconvene with the car and add their new mod and avoid the burnination. Thankfully there are no thatched-roof cottages.*
"RRAAAAHHH---"
*Trogdor begins to twitch and spasm. His voice grows more hoarse and his skin turns a pale blue, his beefy arm black as the night*
"RRREEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHEEEEE!!! FINALLYYYYYYYY!!! A BODYYYYYYYYY!!!!"
"Phroooaggh? Well that can’t be good …"
*Doof ponders in DOmni-think pose as we fade out*
*We open up on the balcony of the building you see in the video above. And you hear the song in the video below, the role of the female in the video is being represented in this instance by a computer screen with Brie Mason, who is not a freemason, on the screen, the voice is just Doof being pitched up … like half an octave, to sound more … I dunno what that is he sounds like. And the role of Doof is of course being played by our eldritch empowered version of the financial backer and leader of the Angry Mad Chemists, Dr. Heinz Doofenshmirtz.*
"Love was once a crazy dream, Now it's my new evil scheme. And I'm as happy as can be! It's the age-old story.
How an evil boy meets an evil girl, We got a love strong enough to rule the whole wide world, We both maniacally laugh at all the same stuff, I found my other half, yes, I got an evil love!
When our robot armies march to the beating of our hearts, I'm as happy as can be! It's the age-old story.
How an evil boy meets an evil girl, We got a love strong enough to rule the whole, wide world We both maniacally laugh at all the same stuff, You can't foil a plan that's built upon evil love!"
*The door bursts open and onto the balcony steps the driver of the AMC, William Lastname and his oh so juicy behind.*
"Why hello William! Isn’t it glorious? We won the race and now I will win the heart of my evil love Brie Mason! *he zones out* Who is not a freemason! *he shakes it off* Huh … that’s new."
"Heinz we need to talk. Ovi, Ian, and I have some concerns about this new plan and the new inventions you’ve been coming up with."
"*SIGH* Oh very well Billy, let’s go inside so you don’t have to worry your pretty red labcoat. You’re driving a champion chemistruckinator! I can’t have you doubting my plans. Let’s talk about my plans. I mean, it’s like my favorite thing to do anyway, especially to an audience!"
*We crash cut to the meeting room within the evil lair of the AMC located in the tri-state area. Ovi and Ian are sitting at the table. They are looking over some files. Notably it seems the indoctrinator has been off as Ian is not dripping with sweat into his mechanic overalls and Ovi’s moustache hasn’t assaulted him with his own weapons designs.*
"Don’t you SEE Brundle? It’s glorious. I need it. I must encase it in a robot and use it to power the robot. With a power source that small, adorable, and FAMOUS … I could create a robot that would DESTROY THE HEDGEHOG! BAHAHAHAHAHA!"
"I, uh, think you seem to be, um, forgetting the seven foot elephant … in the room yes? In the room? I can think of forty-two good, um … REASONS … reasons yes? … Reasons to avoid trying to kidnap um, a, uh … kitten."
"BAH! I have never had an issue thwarting the big, strong, dopey type. It’s the speedy, sarcastic, annoying things that foil my plans Ian. That Tiny Fur is the animal powered robit equivalent to a nuclear reactor! A flicky or a Mobian cat is just not up to that level of power! Surely Doof has a way we can steal the cat. Would our indoctrinator work on the cat? Could it be coerced into making MAD CHEMISTRY with me!?"
"I would, uh, be less … concerned … um … if the Indoctrinator was the reason for your sudden obsession. We need to focus on uh … the uh … problems at hand? Yes? Before making new ones?"
*The door opens and William walks in and sits at the table… his butt promptly deflates with a deafening PFFFFFRRRRRRRRRRRTTTTT! Ah see the room is shielded! That makes sense. Doof then barges in!*
"GENTLEMEN! BEHOLD! OUR NEWEST WEAPON IN THE RACE TO WIN RACES AND THE HEARTS OF BRIE MASON! … who is not a free mason …"
*He holds up a small tesla coil looking machine.*
"We mount this to the chemistruckinator and now we have a targeted, RACE LEGAL, indoctinator!"
"That’s our issue Heinz. You put the specs for the machine in the safety and car spec sheets! I’m concerned that since we can only have one active at a time that the announcers and maybe other teams will REALIZE what’s been going on and turn against us! Or worse! What if they find out that this machine causes all kinds of side effects! You remember the whole furor over the burns the doof floof caused at first! You are revealing a LOT to the public! The plan was progressing quite well in secret! You could have lied and called it a … laser pointer meant to blind the racers and let it do it’s subtle brain bending behind the scenes!"
"GASP! Ovi that is against the rules! We may be evil but we aren’t cheaters!"
*They all just look at him and blink …*
"REEEEEEEEEE!"
*the voice booms out from the speakers in the room.*
"Oh shush, it’s not cheating if every other team in the racing league has some kind of supernatural horror in it! Have you SEEN those turtles? Or that beetle with the ram rod? THAT should be illegal."
"Heinz we are, uh, concerned. Your newfound chaos magic power stuff is uh, going to your head. You’ve made a great error … in um … doubting … that life will find a way … to screw with us! The fly … FLY … in the um … ointment, ointment so to speak, the fly is … public perception is a big part of our um … surge in … ratings and rankings! The money and fame uh … very much furthers our goals! You are going to blow it with this reveal of classified information. Hehe."
"Besides, this mounted version will be targeting people with concentrated blasts, who KNOWS what side effects it will have on the targets. Sure they will STRONGLY feel the influence of the ray and may avoid attacking us or let us get away with stuff, but as soon as the ray is not trained on them they will see the results. I think it’s a bad idea. I don’t want to be mauled by a seven foot moon monster, an eldritch horror car, a ghost car, a ninja turtle, a topless dude, a sorority sister, or worst of all … the nerdy furries."
*He shudders, flashbacks to school and the rise to his evil prominence cause him to shed a manly evil tear.*
"Well then we will need security at the home base won’t we. BEHOLD … my NEWEST invention … the BURNINATOR!"
*The three other men all smile and perk up. That sounds like a devastating chemical weapon! Something real to defend themselves with! And now they are feeli… and it’s instantly deflated when a roar is heard and into the room bursts this:
*"RRRAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWRRRRRRRR"
"Mommy’s very angry …"
"DOOF WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?!"
*The man … er … dragon-man … er … maybe it’s just a dragon … with a beefy arm which looks good coming out of the back of his neck there … begins to breathe fire and burninate the whole conference room. But look at all his majesty! Such consummate v’s!*
"DOOF you’ve created a monstrosity! That isn’t science! What urged you to spawn a … wingaling dragon?"
"He’s the BURNINATOR! I call him Trogdor. He’s going to be my pet and gift to Brie Mason! … who isn’t a free mason."
*Doof shakes his head and breathes in his hand and sniffs it, why does he keep saying that? The other three all run from the room to reconvene with the car and add their new mod and avoid the burnination. Thankfully there are no thatched-roof cottages.*
"RRAAAAHHH---"
*Trogdor begins to twitch and spasm. His voice grows more hoarse and his skin turns a pale blue, his beefy arm black as the night*
"RRREEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHEEEEE!!! FINALLYYYYYYYY!!! A BODYYYYYYYYY!!!!"
"Phroooaggh? Well that can’t be good …"
*Doof ponders in DOmni-think pose as we fade out*
