Get It Out Of My System. (rp2)
Aug 22, 2021 22:52:00 GMT -5
vastrix, Roy "The Sorrow" Harlowe (NJC), and 1 more like this
Post by Steve Awesome on Aug 22, 2021 22:52:00 GMT -5
We open inside a local Home Depot.
“Hi. Can I help you find anything today?”
A female store employee pleasantly offers her services to a customer. The customer stops and nods their head.
“Yeah I’m looking for the paint section.”
The clerk smiles and points.
“Oh absolutely. That’s going to be down that way In aisle three.”
“Oh thank you. You are very helpful.”
The customer smiles back and heads off in the direction the clerk said the paint was in. The clerk continues down into another aisle and she spots another customer in a hood and sunglasses.
It was Steve Awesome. Doing his absolute best to remain incognito. Being famous all over the world, just appearing somewhere would surely cause a riot in the streets. He probably could have sent an assistant to get anything he needed, but this was a more personal thing. He’d rather handle it alone.
“Hi! Can I help you find anything today?”
“Yes, actually….”
Steve turns around, still disguised in the hood and the sunglasses, and holds up zip ties and nylon rope.
“Let’s just pretend I wanted to tie someone up…I mean obviously I don’t because that’s weird, but just pretend I did…..”
He says, trying to be smooth about it but failing.
“....which of these do you think is the best? Like I’m trying to make sure I can’t get out, I mean they can’t get out. I mean, for pretend….”
Steve smiles his best attempt at an innocent smile. The clerk just stares at him in disgust.
Cut to two brawny security guards shoving Steve out of the store and the behest of the Home Depot store clerk.
“And stay out ya weirdo!”
One of the guards yelled.
“Yeah! You’re lucky we don't call the cops!”
The other guard said. Steve growled back at them.
“Go ahead! Tell them to show up and hog tie me to the street post!”
That outburst even surprised Steve, himself. He quickly calmed himself down.
“Okay, woah, I need to reel it in a bit here. I’m getting a little crazy.”
A few people start walking up to the home depot door and they hear this hooded man rambling to himself.
“I just need to get it out of my system. But how? What am I supposed to do, find a hooker and have her tie me up?”
The customers listen in shock. Steve turns and shouts at them.
“Dont kink shame me!!”
He finally storms off.
“So here is kind of a funny story for some people as we get closer to the NPW show in Halifax this week.”
Steve Awesome is doing a twitch stream and just chatting with his fans that paid money to be included.
“So im in my gym training for the match this week, just doing my thing, getting shined and primed for television and ready to whip ass. I think i was doing squats and my phone goes off saying I got a message. I go check it out and its a notification from Northern Pro saying that my opponent Billy Fowler cut a promo earlier today.”
He chuckles a bit and shakes his head.
“Thats not the funny part, well unless you watched it of course, but I expected him to cut a promo. Its part of his job, its not that weird that people do that. It’s just, it was weird to me because I honestly thought he had already cut a promo. Like I thought for sure I watched two Billy Fowler promos already this week and now suddenly my phone is telling me he cut another today.”
He laughs to himself.
“Turns out, apparently I unnecessarily sat through two Edward Zepp promos and I didnt even god damn realize it. Ha ha ha. I thought those were Billy Fowler promos. Oh man, its impossible to tell any of those guys apart.”
He laughs a little more and then shakes his head.
“Oh man, I said it was kinda funny. Anyway, I did eventually get to Fowler’s promo. I guess he’s mad at management for booking him in matches he can't win or something. Plus, he has no faith in his tag team partner too. Those two are going to collapse as soon as they have to try and work together. I love it when my opponents don’t like to try. It really makes winning so much easier. I’m going to have fun climbing up that tall bitch and slapping some sense into him. Now he will have something real to complain about.
He smiles and gives the thumbs up.
“And speaking of trying…..this goes out to my tag partner EVK.”
He points into the camera.
“Do “NOT” try any of that funny business you pulled on Honor last week.”
He pulls his sunglasses down and stares into the camera with dead pan eyes.
“You hear what im saying? I don’t like you, understand. We are just partners.
He starts nodding his head.
“So you absolutely, positively, one hundred percent, "BETTER NOT", try doing anything messed up like kidnap me and tie me up naked to a medical table.”
He pulls his sunglasses off and points into his eyes.
“Pay attention real good….”
He doesn't blink.
“I would not like that at all!”
He crosses his arms.
“Let’s just beat Fowler and Apathy,...”
He starts shaking his head no.
“....and then we both just go our separate ways.”
Steve flashes a satisfactory smile and reaches for the camera to cut it off. Right before he hits stop, he starts saying something to himself.
“I think I was subtle enough with that….”
Cut.
“Hi. Can I help you find anything today?”
A female store employee pleasantly offers her services to a customer. The customer stops and nods their head.
“Yeah I’m looking for the paint section.”
The clerk smiles and points.
“Oh absolutely. That’s going to be down that way In aisle three.”
“Oh thank you. You are very helpful.”
The customer smiles back and heads off in the direction the clerk said the paint was in. The clerk continues down into another aisle and she spots another customer in a hood and sunglasses.
It was Steve Awesome. Doing his absolute best to remain incognito. Being famous all over the world, just appearing somewhere would surely cause a riot in the streets. He probably could have sent an assistant to get anything he needed, but this was a more personal thing. He’d rather handle it alone.
“Hi! Can I help you find anything today?”
“Yes, actually….”
Steve turns around, still disguised in the hood and the sunglasses, and holds up zip ties and nylon rope.
“Let’s just pretend I wanted to tie someone up…I mean obviously I don’t because that’s weird, but just pretend I did…..”
He says, trying to be smooth about it but failing.
“....which of these do you think is the best? Like I’m trying to make sure I can’t get out, I mean they can’t get out. I mean, for pretend….”
Steve smiles his best attempt at an innocent smile. The clerk just stares at him in disgust.
Cut to two brawny security guards shoving Steve out of the store and the behest of the Home Depot store clerk.
“And stay out ya weirdo!”
One of the guards yelled.
“Yeah! You’re lucky we don't call the cops!”
The other guard said. Steve growled back at them.
“Go ahead! Tell them to show up and hog tie me to the street post!”
That outburst even surprised Steve, himself. He quickly calmed himself down.
“Okay, woah, I need to reel it in a bit here. I’m getting a little crazy.”
A few people start walking up to the home depot door and they hear this hooded man rambling to himself.
“I just need to get it out of my system. But how? What am I supposed to do, find a hooker and have her tie me up?”
The customers listen in shock. Steve turns and shouts at them.
“Dont kink shame me!!”
He finally storms off.
“So here is kind of a funny story for some people as we get closer to the NPW show in Halifax this week.”
Steve Awesome is doing a twitch stream and just chatting with his fans that paid money to be included.
“So im in my gym training for the match this week, just doing my thing, getting shined and primed for television and ready to whip ass. I think i was doing squats and my phone goes off saying I got a message. I go check it out and its a notification from Northern Pro saying that my opponent Billy Fowler cut a promo earlier today.”
He chuckles a bit and shakes his head.
“Thats not the funny part, well unless you watched it of course, but I expected him to cut a promo. Its part of his job, its not that weird that people do that. It’s just, it was weird to me because I honestly thought he had already cut a promo. Like I thought for sure I watched two Billy Fowler promos already this week and now suddenly my phone is telling me he cut another today.”
He laughs to himself.
“Turns out, apparently I unnecessarily sat through two Edward Zepp promos and I didnt even god damn realize it. Ha ha ha. I thought those were Billy Fowler promos. Oh man, its impossible to tell any of those guys apart.”
He laughs a little more and then shakes his head.
“Oh man, I said it was kinda funny. Anyway, I did eventually get to Fowler’s promo. I guess he’s mad at management for booking him in matches he can't win or something. Plus, he has no faith in his tag team partner too. Those two are going to collapse as soon as they have to try and work together. I love it when my opponents don’t like to try. It really makes winning so much easier. I’m going to have fun climbing up that tall bitch and slapping some sense into him. Now he will have something real to complain about.
He smiles and gives the thumbs up.
“And speaking of trying…..this goes out to my tag partner EVK.”
He points into the camera.
“Do “NOT” try any of that funny business you pulled on Honor last week.”
He pulls his sunglasses down and stares into the camera with dead pan eyes.
“You hear what im saying? I don’t like you, understand. We are just partners.
He starts nodding his head.
“So you absolutely, positively, one hundred percent, "BETTER NOT", try doing anything messed up like kidnap me and tie me up naked to a medical table.”
He pulls his sunglasses off and points into his eyes.
“Pay attention real good….”
He doesn't blink.
“I would not like that at all!”
He crosses his arms.
“Let’s just beat Fowler and Apathy,...”
He starts shaking his head no.
“....and then we both just go our separate ways.”
Steve flashes a satisfactory smile and reaches for the camera to cut it off. Right before he hits stop, he starts saying something to himself.
“I think I was subtle enough with that….”
Cut.
