Retort to a retort - Bear-O-Dactyl
Sept 8, 2021 13:47:23 GMT -5
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Union Jack and robriot like this
Post by Deleted on Sept 8, 2021 13:47:23 GMT -5
Live from deep within the confines of Scotiabank Centre, Blake Samuels stands before a plain white door.
Marred with scrapes and puck marks, the home of Northern Pro Wrestling was also home to the Quebec Major Junior Hockey League’s, Halifax Mooseheads.
Microphone in hand, the smiling suit-clad voice of NPW gets to work almost immediately, “Blake Samuels here with all the latest in NPW news and exclusive interviews! Now, I’m here outside the locker room of a duo who made quite a splash at our last show. They interrupted the opening of the show to announce their arrival in NPW. Ladies and Gentlemen, bare with me as I try to get a word with…Bear-O-Dactyl!”
Knocking on the door, Blake finishes his set up. “Boasting a parade the likes of which NPW had never seen before, Bear-O-Dactyl was welcomed by the fans and I hear they’ve taken up residence in the area!”
The door opens and none other than Union Jack stands in the doorway, the strap on his bear mask is undone and he’s in a white towel and flip flops. “Hey Union Jack, Blake Samuels here with NPW…”
Barely getting his introduction out, he’s practically crushed in the embrace of Union Jack who drops his towel in the process, “Warren! You jumped ship too! So good to see you mate!”
Standing there in the grasp of a man wearing only a blue bear mask emblazoned with the flag of his beloved England, Blake Samuels practically shrieks.
“Jack! Jack! Get off of me! Are you insane?!” Pushing the confused Luchador away, Union Jack quickly grabs his towel, covering his ‘modesty’ and darts back through the open door muttering something about ‘thinking he’d be happier to see him’ as Pequeno Dinosaurio appears in the doorway.
“Pequeno Dinosaurio, you and your…” Clearly still shaken up from his meeting with Jack, Blake pauses before getting himself back on track. “…partner, announced to the locker room you were here, but as of yet, there’s been no match featuring Bear-O-Dactyl booked. Does this have anything to do with the comments of Donzig?”
Brushing off Blake’s attempt at investigative journalism, Dinosaurio smiles, “Not at all, we simply haven’t given the ok to management to book us yet. We’re getting settled here in Halifax. The NPW faithful can look forward to seeing us real soon! But…I do have something to say to Donzig.”
Dinosaurio’s posture changes, he’s more ridged, more intense. “You have a lot of nerve cabron. Talking about us when you’re literally a part of the problem ese. The KGB.” Clearly angered by the garbage Donzig had spewed their way, Pequeno Dinosaurio is full of passion, his words like searing flames. “Don’t get it twisted cabron. What we said was, that that carny rat promoter friend of yours put himself ahead of the talent on his roster. The talent. Not just us specifically, but certainly not you, the KGB’s prized cabana boy.”
Looking into the camera, Dinosaurio takes the microphone from Blake as the camera zooms in. “How many grudge matches or special attractions has he booked ahead of people who have earned that spot higher on the card? How many stupid talk shows? Actually Donzig, I’d settle for the answer to this; do you have to wear a white hood when you fetch Soutter his coffee?”
Joined by, a now clothed, Union Jack; the man-bear slaps his partner on the shoulder and takes the mic. “Aye, Donzig looks like the kind of bloke you could see on TV on Tuesday nights for nine ninety-nine. Not us, Bear-O-Dactyl is one hundred percent original! No Tabasco Ciampa clones here, only the top imaginary hybrid animal since the Liger!” Shoehorning in an insult and a Napoleon Dynamite reference, Jack isn’t done.
“Look, I said it before and I’ll say it again. The only reason the KGB are Trios Champions is because there’s only two of us! Donzig is just another bloke running his mouth, hoping to become a meme. He’s spread too thin, and just like if you spread Marmite too thin, he’s got no flavour, no substance.”
Doing his very best mocking impression of Donzig, the Lucha-bear continues, “I am the scourge…blah blah blah…Chosen of the Boyd.” Before switching back to his normal voice, “Like I’m supposed to care that some bloke named Boyd fancies him…”
Placing a hand upon the shoulder of the face-palming Blake, Dinosaurio leans into the microphone, correcting Jack. “Void amigo. I think he says he’s the chosen of the void.”
Throwing his arms up in disbelief, Union Jack exclaims, “What?! Really? Well, that’s even dumber, Boyd’s a solid chap! Donzig could be so lucky!”
Finally regaining control of the microphone, Blake Samuels tries again. “Right…now, the KGB have established roots here in NPW, will we expect more meetings between you?”
Trying the more professional of the two, Blake holds the microphone for the young man nearing the end of his rookie year, Pequeno Dinosaurio. “First things first Blake, we’ll get a debut match soon. Maybe even sooner than you might imagine…after that? It’s all about building a case to challenge for the Imperial Crown Tagteam Championships. We’re here to take NPW’s Tagteam Division to new heights. If that leads us through the KGB, so be it. But our goal is showing the world what we’re capable of. First it was Mexico, then America, now Canada. One territory at a time we’re making our name! Soon everyone will know about Bear-O-Dactyl!”
Sensing he wouldn’t get much more from the fun loving and high flying duo, Blake Samuels wraps up a short but noteworthy interview. “There you have it NPW fans! Bear-O-Dactyl has come to Northern Pro Wrestling with Championship gold on their mind and who knows, maybe we’ll see these wildcards enter the upcoming Honor Battle Royal that sees the runners up join the Imperial Crown Tagteam Championship match with Prime Time and The Bastards! Time will tell, for Northern Pro Wrestling, I’m Blake Samuels and I’ll see you at the arena!”
Marred with scrapes and puck marks, the home of Northern Pro Wrestling was also home to the Quebec Major Junior Hockey League’s, Halifax Mooseheads.
Microphone in hand, the smiling suit-clad voice of NPW gets to work almost immediately, “Blake Samuels here with all the latest in NPW news and exclusive interviews! Now, I’m here outside the locker room of a duo who made quite a splash at our last show. They interrupted the opening of the show to announce their arrival in NPW. Ladies and Gentlemen, bare with me as I try to get a word with…Bear-O-Dactyl!”
Knocking on the door, Blake finishes his set up. “Boasting a parade the likes of which NPW had never seen before, Bear-O-Dactyl was welcomed by the fans and I hear they’ve taken up residence in the area!”
The door opens and none other than Union Jack stands in the doorway, the strap on his bear mask is undone and he’s in a white towel and flip flops. “Hey Union Jack, Blake Samuels here with NPW…”
Barely getting his introduction out, he’s practically crushed in the embrace of Union Jack who drops his towel in the process, “Warren! You jumped ship too! So good to see you mate!”
Standing there in the grasp of a man wearing only a blue bear mask emblazoned with the flag of his beloved England, Blake Samuels practically shrieks.
“Jack! Jack! Get off of me! Are you insane?!” Pushing the confused Luchador away, Union Jack quickly grabs his towel, covering his ‘modesty’ and darts back through the open door muttering something about ‘thinking he’d be happier to see him’ as Pequeno Dinosaurio appears in the doorway.
“Pequeno Dinosaurio, you and your…” Clearly still shaken up from his meeting with Jack, Blake pauses before getting himself back on track. “…partner, announced to the locker room you were here, but as of yet, there’s been no match featuring Bear-O-Dactyl booked. Does this have anything to do with the comments of Donzig?”
Brushing off Blake’s attempt at investigative journalism, Dinosaurio smiles, “Not at all, we simply haven’t given the ok to management to book us yet. We’re getting settled here in Halifax. The NPW faithful can look forward to seeing us real soon! But…I do have something to say to Donzig.”
Dinosaurio’s posture changes, he’s more ridged, more intense. “You have a lot of nerve cabron. Talking about us when you’re literally a part of the problem ese. The KGB.” Clearly angered by the garbage Donzig had spewed their way, Pequeno Dinosaurio is full of passion, his words like searing flames. “Don’t get it twisted cabron. What we said was, that that carny rat promoter friend of yours put himself ahead of the talent on his roster. The talent. Not just us specifically, but certainly not you, the KGB’s prized cabana boy.”
Looking into the camera, Dinosaurio takes the microphone from Blake as the camera zooms in. “How many grudge matches or special attractions has he booked ahead of people who have earned that spot higher on the card? How many stupid talk shows? Actually Donzig, I’d settle for the answer to this; do you have to wear a white hood when you fetch Soutter his coffee?”
Joined by, a now clothed, Union Jack; the man-bear slaps his partner on the shoulder and takes the mic. “Aye, Donzig looks like the kind of bloke you could see on TV on Tuesday nights for nine ninety-nine. Not us, Bear-O-Dactyl is one hundred percent original! No Tabasco Ciampa clones here, only the top imaginary hybrid animal since the Liger!” Shoehorning in an insult and a Napoleon Dynamite reference, Jack isn’t done.
“Look, I said it before and I’ll say it again. The only reason the KGB are Trios Champions is because there’s only two of us! Donzig is just another bloke running his mouth, hoping to become a meme. He’s spread too thin, and just like if you spread Marmite too thin, he’s got no flavour, no substance.”
Doing his very best mocking impression of Donzig, the Lucha-bear continues, “I am the scourge…blah blah blah…Chosen of the Boyd.” Before switching back to his normal voice, “Like I’m supposed to care that some bloke named Boyd fancies him…”
Placing a hand upon the shoulder of the face-palming Blake, Dinosaurio leans into the microphone, correcting Jack. “Void amigo. I think he says he’s the chosen of the void.”
Throwing his arms up in disbelief, Union Jack exclaims, “What?! Really? Well, that’s even dumber, Boyd’s a solid chap! Donzig could be so lucky!”
Finally regaining control of the microphone, Blake Samuels tries again. “Right…now, the KGB have established roots here in NPW, will we expect more meetings between you?”
Trying the more professional of the two, Blake holds the microphone for the young man nearing the end of his rookie year, Pequeno Dinosaurio. “First things first Blake, we’ll get a debut match soon. Maybe even sooner than you might imagine…after that? It’s all about building a case to challenge for the Imperial Crown Tagteam Championships. We’re here to take NPW’s Tagteam Division to new heights. If that leads us through the KGB, so be it. But our goal is showing the world what we’re capable of. First it was Mexico, then America, now Canada. One territory at a time we’re making our name! Soon everyone will know about Bear-O-Dactyl!”
Sensing he wouldn’t get much more from the fun loving and high flying duo, Blake Samuels wraps up a short but noteworthy interview. “There you have it NPW fans! Bear-O-Dactyl has come to Northern Pro Wrestling with Championship gold on their mind and who knows, maybe we’ll see these wildcards enter the upcoming Honor Battle Royal that sees the runners up join the Imperial Crown Tagteam Championship match with Prime Time and The Bastards! Time will tell, for Northern Pro Wrestling, I’m Blake Samuels and I’ll see you at the arena!”