Episode XXXIII Is Live!

[Matt]

EPISODE XXXIII

Click here to read the show in dark mode on Google Docs.


(As the fans hustle around the arena, trying to get things like drinks and snacks. They are all stopped in the tracks as “Sick of Me” by Beartooth, starts to begin to play. The camera pans over to see a man, unknown to the UPW crowd standing in the middle of the ring.)

“Greetings.”

The man proclaims.

“I know. I know right now you are all looking at me and going who is this schmuck and what the hell is he doing in the middle of this ring. Well, let me introduce myself. I am The Prince of Perfection, The Status Quo, The Guideline by which all men are measured. I am Joe Nobody. As for why I’m here. The answer is simple, to do whatever the hell I want. I want a fight. I want a challenge. I want the title.

And I know what you're all thinking, you can’t just come in here and demand the title. You need to follow the rules, earn your spot. Well, I say screw the rules. I’ve been following the rules for the last two years, and you know what I got for following the rules. I’ve had my Ascension absconded, My Destiny denied, My Fire has flickered out, and my Syndication suspended. I’ve busted my ass off, time and time again, and I got out of it was grief and misery.

Well, you know what, I'm tired of it. I’m tired of getting passed by, forgotten, left to rot in the sun, while those with less talent than me got all the glory. But instead of getting down on myself. Instead of letting those who believe I’m a waste of space get to me. I realized something if I’m going to get back to myself. I need to find a way to move UP. Some way to pick myself UP. To keep moving forward. To keep me from bringing myself down into the depths of depression and despair. I need to go UP.

So I came to UP Wrestling. And I look at all the talent this company has. People like Ms. Sears, a fellow Detroit native, who reminds me so much of my younger days. And she’s only one of a handful of people in the back. I would love to work either against or alongside. The choice for those in the back is simple. You can either sit there like good students and listen to a man with 14 years of experience in the squared circle. Gather some valuable lessons that will help you grow in both skill and knowledge. Or you can expose your weakness, by trying to see what chance you have against perfection. Start forming a line boys, because I’m not here to cut in line. I’m here to knock it over.”

=============
Team Sp!ke vs. THC
=============

(The match begins already in progress.)

Lobo: Annie and Jack Ruby will be starting for their teams, and they lock up in the center of the ring.

Sir Oliver: Ruby forces Annie to one knee, no easy feat. Oh, my! Annie is powering her way back to her feet.

V: She's not going to be held down by some man.

(Annie steps behind Jack and performs a hip toss. Jack rolls through, only to be hit with a second hip toss. Jack comes back up and is met with a drop kick. Annie brings Jack to his feet and applies an arm wringer, forcing Jack into her corner and tagging to Carson who comes over the top rope with an axe handle smash to Jack's arm.)

Sir Oliver: Shotgun Annie is showing some very good fundamental wrestling tonight.

Lobo: No doubt in part to the coaching of her brother Carson, who is really cranking down on Jack's arm.

(Jack tries to move Carson towards the ropes, but Castle does not budge. Ruby steps in and performs an arm drag. Ruby comes off the ropes and hits Carson with a shoulder tackle which stumbles Castle backwards. Carson signals for another. Jack hits the ropes and barrels into Carson who stands firm. Ruby tries to whip Carson into the ropes. Castle reverses. Ruby comes off the ropes and both men land simultaneous clotheslines.)

Lobo: That was like two trains colliding! Jack and Carson both roll toward their corners.

V: Yeah. Here come the girls. I can't wait to see Annie rip off some pixie wings.

(Annie comes in hot, but Pixi sweeps her legs, sending Annie to the mat. Annie kips up quickly, only to be met with a spinning heel kick. Annie backs toward the rope and springs off with a head scissors takedown. Pixi rolls to her feet. Annie rushes Pixi for a clothesline. Pixi ducks and dances away gracefully. Annie swings a few punches at Pixi, who ducks each one. Pixi then fires a palm strike into Annie's chin.)

V: Oooh! That was a mistake.

Sir Oliver: Annie Castle is seeing red! I believe Pixilicious just invited Annie to brawl, albeit inadvertently.

Lobo: And brawl she does!

(Annie grabs a handful of Pixi's hair and pulls her hard, backwards onto the mat. Annie is in the air and lands a standing double stomp before Pixi can react. Annie picks up Pixi and whips her into a neutral corner, following with a running knee strike. Annie unloads with a combination of hook punches, uppercuts, and knees until Pixi slides down to the mat.)

Lobo: There is that volatile temper that Annie Castle is famous for. She's mudhole stomping Pixi and now runs the ropes for a face kick.

Sir Oliver: Pixilicious moves out of harm's way just in the nick of time. Annie is caught in the ropes. It looked as if her boot may have caught the ring rope, forcing her ankle in an unnatural direction. Pixi quickly goes to her corner to tag in the fresh man.

V: I think that may be the first time in a long time anyone referred to Jack Ruby as "fresh."

(Ruby enters the ring and grabs Annie as she untangles herself from the ropes. Annie stumbles a bit out of the ropes and limps as Ruby pulls her in for a scoop slam. Ruby runs the ropes, hits a leg drop, and goes for the cover.)

Edwards: ONE...TWO...kick out!

(Ruby gets to his feet and picks up Annie, slinging her toward her own corner. Carson tries to make the tag, but Annie shakes her head no and goes back on the attack. She limps toward Ruby and swings. Ruby easily dodges the blow, and Annie's face turns red with anger. She limps in closer and calls for a shot to the face. Ruby fires a forearm shot, and Annie hits back with an elbow. Ruby fires another forearm shot off and knocks Annie down. Annie hits the mat in frustration and gets back to her feet again.)

Sir Oliver: Miss Castle does not want to leave this fight, despite the fact that there is obviously something wrong with her right ankle.

V: She's tough but stupid, just like her brother.

Lobo: Moe from Jack's Place is in the front row, and he seems to be pleading with Castle to tag out. Jack is even checking on her.

(As Jack leans down to check on Annie, she grabs his hair and hits a Savage headbutt. Jack goes down and looks dazed. Annie gets up and stomps Jack a few times for good measure, then heads for the turnbuckle.)

Lobo: What's this? Annie doesn't need to be attempting anything high risk. She needs to tag out!

Sir Oliver: Good luck convincing the girl of that. She moonsaults and looks to land a double stomp. Jack rolls out of the way and...oh dear! I believe that error in judgement has left Miss Castle's ankle in even worse condition than before.

V: Like, who's fault is that? Serves her right for being a glory hog.

(Ruby tags in Pixi, who immediately picks up Annie and fireman carries her to Carson, who makes the blind tag. Annie looks beside herself as Pixi and Carson lock up. Moe gives a sigh of relief that Annie is out of the ring, but still looks concerned. Pixi hits a flurry of kicks and Carson is sent reeling into the ropes. Pixi whips Carson who rebounds off the ropes. Pixi attempts a hurricanrana. Carson stands firm and refuses to go over, holding Pixi upside down and transitioning to an elevated Boston crab.)

Lobo: What an impressive power move by Castle! He's got Pixi in some trouble here as Edwards checks in for the submission.

Sir Oliver: She looks to be more annoyed than in any sort of distress. She is quite flexible, you know?

V: Snap her in half!

(Carson released the hold and clubs Pixi across the back. Castle picks up Pixi and slams her back down with a belly to belly suplex. Pixi slips away as Carson goes to pick her up again and hits a spin wheel kick, sending Carson back into his own corner where Annie makes the blind tag.)

Lobo: Annie has just tagged herself into the match again!

Sir Oliver: You can take the girl out of the fight, but you can't take the fight out of that girl, but is it wise for her to enter into this contest with her ankle injured?

(Annie limps toward Pixi and is taken over with a quick northern lights suplex. Annie slips right back up and nails Pixi with a stiff forearm shot, following up with a quick snapmare that takes Pixi into her own corner. Jack Ruby comes in and takes Annie down with a clothesline, followed up by a quick power slam. Ruby hesitates a second, then grabs Annie's ankle in an ankle lock.)

Lobo: Annie taps immediately!

Anderson: Ladies and Gentlemen, the winners of this match via submission...TEAM SPIKE!

Sir Oliver: A valiant effort by Miss Annie, but discretion is the better part of valor.

(The lights fade suddenly as "Nucleus" by Robert Slump plays over the P.A. system.)

V: Oh yes!!! It's Devy!!!

Lobo: What's this all about?

Sir Oliver: The World Openweight Champion looks to have something to say as he has a microphone in hand.

Bishop: THC! Another loss...must be disappointing, but then again, you Castle's seem to be getting used to disappointment. I'm not here to berate you for your lack of skill...or personal hygiene. I'm here for a little bit of payback. You see, you broke one of my toys. That party bus was...well, I was very fond of it. I hardly had a chance to break it in before you set it on fire and made it explode. Now, it's time for karma to give you her sweet sweet kiss. If you'd be so kind as to direct your attention to the video screen... you'll see Annie Castle's monster truck. A Dodge Ram sitting on an impressive lift kit, isn't it? Now...take a look at the detonator in my hand.

(Bishop holds up a small detonator in his right hand and presses the large red button. The arena shakes slightly as the truck is blown to pieces in the back parking lot.)

Bishop: Oh dear! Did someone just get what they deserve? Don't worry, I'm sure your buddies in the ring there will offer a shoulder to cry on.

====================
Saint Sakura vs. Runel Abekab
====================

Lobo: I tell you right now is a great time to be a part of UP Wrestling. Tonight, we have another debut for you. Saint Sakura gets to show us just what she brings to the table for our company.

V: Or, like The Unbreakable Goblin gets to reprove himself.

Sir Oliver: Indeed. We pride ourselves on this being where Lady Luck meets you in the ring. Everyone has an opportunity to excel in UP Wrestling.

Lobo: You put the work in and hope that things go your way. Luck or not though, my money is on Sakura in this match.

Sir Oliver: Well let us find out.

*Anderson: This next match is singles action and is set for one fall. The first competitor weighs in at one hundred and sixty pounds and stands at five feet seven inches tall… he is the Unbreakable Goblin… RUNEL ABEKAB!!!

(“Give Up The Ghost” by Thousand Foot Krutch plays. Runel Abekab comes out of his locker room, painted a dark-forest green with red around the eyes talking to himself as he walks carrying a Bo Staff. Entering through the curtain he wears a brown gi, a silver belt and brown pants. Taking a knee he prays before walking to the ring looking around, sliding under the bottom rope, he does a martial arts pose before sitting cross-legged in center.)

*Anderson: From all the way across the world and then some... She has politely requested her weight not be disclosed but her height is in fact 5'5"... SAINT SAKURA.

(“Love Sick” by Beach Bunny begins to play as Saint Sakura poses in an over the top magical girl style. She is dressed in such a manner as well with an over the top dress and wand to match. After drawing a heart with her wand. She rushes to the ring and hops up each of the steps until making it to the apron. There she throws her wand into the air and catches it posing one last time.)

Sir Oliver: These are two of the most interesting looking people and personalities that I’ve seen in the ring at the same time.

Lobo: We got a wand versus a bo staff here.

V: If only they could use them in this match to like, maim each other.

(BELL RINGS)

Lobo: And here we go…

(Runel and Saint Sakura meet in the middle of the ring. Both look ready to fight and Sakura connects with the first blow hitting the Unbreakable Goblin with a swift back elbow. He falls back and Saint Sakura connects with a chop. It reddens his chest and he stumbles back more. Saint Sakura runs forwards and Runel goes for a back body drop.

It sends Saint Sakura over the ropes, but she lands feet first on the apron. Runel wasn’t expecting this or the full leg kick to his back. He stammers forward holding his lower half. He turns getting met with a springboard Frankensteiner that causes a great deal of energy through the crowd.)

Lobo: A great start for Saint Sakura. She’s taking it to Runel and already winning over our fans.

(Runel looks out of sorts, but moves to get back on his feet. Saint Sakura punishes him with an echoing kick to the chest. He falls back, but she quickly pulls him up and sends Runel into the ropes. He catches the ropes with both arms, but Saint rushes forward and clotheslines him over the top rope.)

V: I’m telling you. Like, Runel better get that bo staff and just start swinging. It's really the only way he’s got a chance. #BreakableDoofus

(Runel is sprawled out on the cold, hard floor. Saint Sakura gets backed up by Referee Edwards. He gets to the count of five before Saint Sakura slides out of the ring and throws Runel back in.)

Sir Oliver: This young lady means business in her first match here.

Lobo: She is already proving to everyone that Saint Sakura has a lot of heart.

V: She also seems to like these people for some reason. She’s pandering to the crowd before leaping from the top rope.

(Runel is laid out on the mat. Saint Sakura climbs to the top rope and delivers a senton bomb. Clapping echoes through the Sahara Events Center. Sakura stands up and takes a quick bow before pulling Runel back to his feet.

She backs him up with two more back elbows. The ropes catch him or he would most likely be back on the mat. Sakura strikes with another chop. Runel pops up and delivers a European uppercut. It surprises Saint Sakura and everyone in the building.)

Sir Oliver: Mr. Abekab will not go down without a fight.

Lobo: Saint Sakura has delivered all the offense. Let’s see how she handles this.

(The uppercut was unexpected. Saint Sakura steps back. Runel steps forward and hits another one. He goes to whip Saint Sakura into the ropes, but she reverses it. Saint Sakura catches Runel as he rebounds from the ropes up onto her shoulders. She walks over just enough to dump him out of the ring and over the top rope yet again.)

V: It's bo staff or bust at this point.

Lobo: I’m not sure using that as a weapon at this point would help.

Edwards: 1… 2… 3… 4… 5… 6… 7… 8…

(Saint Sakura saves Runel from the count yet again. He gets tossed back in the ring. Saint Sakura poses on the apron to the fans’ enjoyment before stepping back in.

She takes a moment to measure and then thrust kicks Runel in the head. The dazed man’s head bobbles around. Referee Edwards goes to check on him, but before he can Saint Sakura is pulling him back up. She pushes Runel into the corner and begins kicking him in the midsection over and over again.)

Crowd: 1… 2… 3… 4… 5… 6… 7… 8… 9…

(She turns and waves to the crowd before hitting the tenth kick. Runel drops to his knees and then faceplants into the mat.)

Lobo: Is she toying with him or is Saint Sakura just eating up the reactions from the crowd?

Sir Oliver: My deduction is both those reasons are valid.

(Saint Sakura backs off as she throws her arms up and begins waving them up. The crowd noise increases. Eventually, Runel gets back up to his feet. He leans against the ropes with his back to his opponent. Saint Sakura makes him pay for that by hitting a standing Sakura Soul Stop to the back of his head. He goes spilling out over the top rope a third time.)

Lobo: TKO!

(BELL RINGS)

*Anderson: The winner of this match as a result of TKO… SAINT SAKURA!!!

Sir Oliver: Impressive. She must have studied UP Wrestling well before joining. Ms. Sakura knew that sending her opponent over the top rope three times in a match would result in a TKO victory.

Lobo: The crowd was loving it and she went right along with that strategy for her first of what could be many wins in UP Wrestling.

=========================
Riley The Jackal vs. The Crimson Mask
=========================

Sir Oliver: Fans, our next contested event is one that does send a bit of a shiver down my spine as The Crimson Mask will be going one-on-one with Riley the Jackal. Crimson Mask has shown to be a bit of a human horror show since his return, and Riley has the daunting task of standing across the ring from him tonight.

Lobo: Not a position a lot of people would want to be in, but he’s there and he’s definitely a capable athlete.

V: Like, let’s get to the ring.

*Anderson: This match is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first… Standing at six feet eight inches tall and weighing in at two hundred and seventy-five pounds... he is RILEY THE JACKAL!!!

("Wolves of Winter" By Biffy Clyro begins to play. Once the main riff hits Riley walks out of the curtain. Slowly he walks down the aisle soaking up the crowd as he looks around the arena. Walking down the ramp he stops and raises a fist. Once in the ring he leans on the ropes and throws another first in the air.)

Sir Oliver: Riley looking as ready as he can be.

*Anderson: And his opponent…

(One by one the lights start going dark. The audience is draped in shadows.

Then red. Red erratic pulses flash throughout the room. They gain steam and power as Carach Angren - Skull with a Forked Tongue hits. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pVQyx4hTkEA for those who want to listen along). From the dark portal of the entrance way comes an enormous figure, the smoke machine working overtime. With a methodical, slow, agonizingly intimidating walk, clad in thick black boots, emerges the figure once known as Kruger Olejnik, now the Crimson Mask. A red "mask" is draped over his head though more a cloth then a mask. The bottom is loose and ragged, looking as if blood was poured over it and dripped down. The mountain of a human being, this artifice of war, is draped in blood strained, loose overalls. They were once white. But gore is entrenched in them, age, dirt and wear bringing them a horror of their own. His hands are wrapped in dirty tape and within the crushing power is held, in each, a dented and rusty metal bucket.)

Lobo: Anderson didn’t even get to finish the introduction, and the Crimson Mask is in the ring.

(BELL RINGS)

Sir Oliver: We are officially underway and Riley rushes Crimson Mask, delivering a series of forearms and punches to the face of Mask, but it doesn’t seem to have much effect. Riley with a huge headbutt, but Mask just delivers a headbutt of his own back.

Lobo: Riley got stumbled by that, and Crimson mask with a hard right uppercut to the throat, sending Riley stumbling back. Mask moves in, but Riley with a boot to the stomach. Barely phases Mask though.

V: Like, he’s gonna have to move if he doesn’t wanna get killed.

(Riley throws another forearm, but this one is blocked by Mask who hits another headbutt, and then another, and then another. He Irish whips Riley into the ropes, taking him down with a huge boot to the face. Mask runs the ropes, leaping high into the air and dropping an elbow across Riley. Crimson Mask doesn’t go for the pin, but instead pulls Riley up by his hair. He lifts him high into the air with a bodyslam, bringing him crashing down to the mat. Mask goes off the ropes again, leaping with a leg drop, but Riley rolls out of the way just in time.)

Lobo: Riley moves and he’s catching his breath, and he hits a discus clothesline on Crimson Mask as the big man gets to his feet. Mask is staggered, and Riley with a big boot to the face which sends Crimson Mask over the top rope and to the outside, but Mask lands on his feet.

Sir Oliver: However, Edwards is noting that Riley gets a point for sending him over the top rope. That may have to be his strategy here, Old Chap.

(Mask methodically gets back in the ring, and as he does, Riley charges him again, but this time he’s caught by the throat. Mask drags him to the middle of the ring and lifts him up, hitting a chokeslam but turning it into a backbreaker on the way down. Riley lands hard, and Crimson Mask drops to a knee, moving the mask only a little to allow himself to begin biting into the head of Riley. Edwards immediately moves in and administers a strike on Mask, who lets up and gets to his feet. Riley is dazed, and Mask hits him with another boot to the head.)

V: It looks like, uh, Riley might be like, bleeding.

Lobo: It does look like there’s a bit of a laceration, but not a big one.

Sir Oliver: Either way, Edwards is trying to admonish Crimson Mask who just brushes past him. Riley throws some rights and lefts to the midsection of Mask and then is able to hit a headbutt to the midsection, and he whips Mask into the ropes and hits a bicycle kick on the way back. Mask gets stunned and Riley charges, hitting a shoulder block.

(Mask is rocked again, and Riley senses an opening. He chops at Mask and whips him across the ropes again, hitting a lariat. Crimson Mask doesn’t go down, but seemed a little taken off balance. Riley runs the ropes again, a second clothesline rocking Mask even more. Riley goes one more time, but this time Mask catches him and “Hot Shots” him across the top rope, snapping Riley’s head backward. As Riley stumbles back, Mask hits him with a boot to the head that drops him.)

Sir Oliver: My word, Old Chap, that kick might’ve just knocked Riley out.

Lobo: That looked like it hit him right in the base of the skull. Riley is down and Edwards is checking on him.

V: Like, Crimson Mask is up to something.

(Crimson Mask walks over to his corner and dips his hands into his buckets, and when he brings them out, they are covered in blood. He stalks over to Riley, standing over him as Riley slowly pushes himself up to his knees. Crimson Mask continues to look at him as Riley gets up to one knee.)

Lobo: Mask is just stalking him, and he grabs him in position and he lifts him into the air… a little higher into an elevated powerbomb and brings Riley crashing down!

Sir Oliver: Goodness.

V: Like, the ring shook.

Lobo: Riley is down and Mask with the cover, hooking the leg, one… two… three. This one is over.

Sir Oliver: Mercifully even.

*Anderson: The winner of this match… The Crimson Mask!

Sir Oliver: Another strong performance by Kru… Crimson Mask.

Lobo: And now he grabs one of his buckets and he pours the blood all over Riley, leaving him a bloody mess in the middle of the ring. Crimson Mask just walks away and climbs out of the ring, and Riley is still down.

V: Like, Mask is a monster that will be hard to stop.



UP WRESTLING WILL BE AT END OF DAYS!

Who will represent us? More details to come!

========================================
Cage & "The Thunder Kid" Ron Masterson vs. TCE & ???????
========================================

Lobo: Two weeks ago, TCE brought along someone. We don’t know who it is, but Cage surely did seem to recognize him.

Sir Oliver: Well I do believe when you said he saw a ghost that was accurate. I heard Mr. Cage saying the man standing before us is dead.

V: Like, no one really dies anymore. I mean watch any show nowadays and they always find a way to bring back someone.

Lobo: This isn’t a fantasy written show Vee. This is UP Wrestling. If TCE dug up a man and reincarnated him, there would probably be some government officials and Elon Musk knocking on our door.

Sir Oliver: Well let us see if the dead man can wrestle shall we.

*Anderson: Ladies and gentlemen, weighing in at 210 pounds and coming in from Mesa, Arizona... this... is... CAGE!

("Thunderstruck" by AC/DC hits, the crowd beginning to chant "Thunder" along with the song. After a few moments, the form of Cage emerges from a spot in the crowd, high-fiving fans as he makes his way to the ring. He jumps over the guard rail and climbs up onto the ring apron, then up to the second turnbuckle. He taps his upper left shoulder and points skyward, before pointing out to the crowd and claps. He hopes down and begins doing some stretches on the ropes.)
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*Anderson: Ladies and gentlemen, coming down at a combined weight of four hundred and sixty-one pounds… they are the team of CAGE and RON MASTERSON!!!

("Thunderstruck" by AC/DC hits, the crowd beginning to chant "Thunder" along with the song. After a few moments, the form of Cage emerges from a spot in the crowd, high-fiving fans as he makes his way to the ring. He jumps over the guard rail and climbs up onto the ring apron, then up to the second turnbuckle. He taps his upper left shoulder and points skyward, before pointing out to the crowd and claps. He hopes down and begins doing some stretches on the ropes. Ron and Donnie Falco make their way down to the ring from the entrance. Once inside, he and Cage share a handshake and await their opponents.)

Lobo: Cage was the man standing in victory weeks ago in his feud with Kruger Olejnik. They were new to each other. This thing between him and TCE has been going on for more than a decade.

Lobo: Bad blood indeed, Old Chap.

*Anderson: Coming down to the ring is a man who weighs in at two hundred and fifty-five pounds and stands at six foot six inches tall, he hails from Roanoke, Virginia... he is T!!! C!!! E!!!

(The lights in the arena dim down as the fans around the arena all react differently. Some boo and others cheer as "Thoughtless" by Korn begins to play. A red spotlight flashes up near the entrance. Moments later, out walks the legend. Accompanying him is the man in a wolverine mask. They go down the aisle passing by the passionate UP Wrestling fans without giving them any attention. TCE steps up the steel stairs and climbs inside the ring. Once inside, he removes his trench coat, tie, and button up shirt. He hands over his clothing to the ring attendant and awaits his opponent in the corner.)

V: That mask is like, scary hot.

Sir Oliver: Only you, Miss Vee.

V: What’s that supposed to mean?

Sir Oliver: I find your taste intriguing.

V: Well… like, that’s kind of creepy.

Lobo: TCE climbs back out of the ring leaving the masked man inside. It appears that he’ll be facing off against Ron.

(BELL RINGS)

Lobo: Ron and the masked man lock up. Ron swiftly moves around twisting the masked man’s arm behind his own back.

Sir Oliver: How do you go about scouting a dead person?

V: You don’t… because they're dead.

Lobo: The masked man tries to reverse the hold, but Ron is ahead of him and flips the masked man over with a hip toss.

V: I wonder if Ron asked Cage those questions TCE brought up.

Sir Oliver: I highly doubt it. Mr. Masterson is a good man. He was trained by Cage. I think they know each other well enough not to let a few words come between them.

V: A few words? Cage jumped the line. How would you, like feel if my mom just fired you to make way for me when I joined the announce team?

Sir Oliver: Mr. Masterson wasn’t fired. I do not see your point.

V: My point is Ron Masterson has held the Tag Team titles and the Sin City Championship. Why does Cage get to like, show up and make demands for a World Openweight Championship match?

Sir Oliver: I never heard him demand. He has a goal.

V: And I bet Ron has the same one. It’d be a damn shame if Ron used his Christmas Chaos prize to insert himself into a match with Cage and take that opportunity wouldn’t it?

Sir Oliver: Have you and TCE been discussing things?

V: No, it's just what I would do if I was in Ronnie boy’s shoes.

Lobo: You both know there is action going on in the ring right?

V: Call it then. That’s what you’re paid to do.

Lobo: Ron has the masked man up and hooks him. Masterson lifts him up and stalls before crashing him back down with a suplex. This kid looks good in the ring every time I see him.

Sir Oliver: Maybe this masked man should have been scouting Mr. Masterson.

Lobo: There’s a lot of great tape on him… well except that one time our cage fell apart and cost him the Sin City Championship against King Diaz.

V: Devy and I watch that sometimes for a good laugh.

Lobo: Masterson sits down on the masked man with a half Boston crab. He has that hold sitting down deep. The masked man is flailing around. Looking at Cage’s face, he seems to be sensing something is going on here. I have no clue what it could be.

Sir Oliver: The mentor is always looking for opportunities to provide coaching to their mentee. Maybe there is some sort of variation Cage is considering.

V: Would you like, consider shutting up?

Lobo: The masked man pulls himself over enough to get a hand on the bottom rope. Referee Edwards comes in and Masterson with the clean break. The masked man holds onto the ropes to help get himself up and Ron backs off. He is letting him gather himself before moving back in.

V: You were a wrestler. You know Ron shouldn’t be messing with him while he’s in the ropes.

Lobo: Shouldn’t be doing it and getting disqualified are too different things. There was a lot of stuff I wasn’t supposed to do in the ring, but I did. Ron’s a good kid though.

Sir Oliver: I second that.

Lobo: The masked man comes off the ropes and shoves Ron! That was flagrant. Ron responds with a knee lift that connects in his midsection. The masked man doubles over and Ron bounces off the ropes. He comes back trying to hit a diving drop kick, but the masked man moves out of the way just in time. Ron hits the mat and now the masked man is stumbling over to get the tag from TCE.

Sir Oliver: I have been looking forward to seeing what he can do in the ring.

Lobo: The masked man reaches out his hand… and TCE just dropped from the apron!

V: Whoa! I was not expecting that.

Lobo: None of us were including the masked man. TCE just dropped down and he’s walking off. The masked man was about to jump out of the ring to get him, but Ron spins him around and hits a stunner. The masked man pops up and drops bat down to the mat.

Sir Oliver: Mr. Masterson with the tag to Cage.

Lobo: Cage wastes no time. He quickly enters the ring, pulls up the masked man, and hits the… THUNDER-CAGE!

V: Cage is like, looking out and sees TCE head to the back.

Lobo: He continues to waste no time and makes the cover.

Edwards: 1… 2… 3!!!

Lobo: Cage and Ron win, but what did we just witness?

Sir Oliver: Cage appears to be wasting no time. Something was afoot earlier. I saw it on his face. He made quick work of this masked man and now Cage is pulling the mask off!

Lobo: Two weeks ago, he saw a ghost and has probably been stir crazy ever since. Cage wants to know who is under that wolverine mask.

V: Well… like, obviously TCE doesn’t care. He left him high and dry and exited.

Lobo: Cage is almost there and Ron is watching his back. Cage’s full focus is finding out who he just fought.

Sir Oliver: He may be the only person who recognizes who is under the mask.

V: And if it is a dead man, he like totally just committed murder in the ring with that Thunder-Cage.

Lobo: Wait a minute… Cage has the mask off. That’s Chad!

Sir Oliver: Wasn’t he fired?

Lobo: He lost a match and had his contract terminated. Did TCE hire Chad to stir up this trickery?

V: Well listen up. TCE is coming back out with a mic and he might just tell us.

(TCE stands at the entrance and does not step closer.)

TCE: Not who you were expecting?

(Cage looks up at TCE with half a sense of relief and another half looking to knock TCE’s head off.)

TCE: You and I know that man is completely in our past and no matter how much both of us would like to see him resurrected… it’s never going to happen. Trust me. If there was a way, I’d find it Cage. Unlike you, my actions back up my words.

Lobo: Cage is up and sitting on the ropes inviting TCE back to the ring.

TCE: Cute Cage. Real cute. Going to have Backseat Ron hit me from behind tonight? Was that your instruction? Can’t make you look like the bad guy. You’re the hero, right?

(The fans’ boos increase with each word TCE says.)

TCE: Did you tell him before the match that you’re the one who gets the pin tonight? I bet Backseat Ron didn’t even blink an eye. He literally ran over to you to get that Thunder-Cage in for the win. You couldn’t let him finish off the competition. That would hurt your chances of beefing up your resume enough for Madame Wu or Elijah to give you a title shot. What about Backseat Ron? I guess his hard work and effort in UP Wrestling mean NOTHING to you.

(Cage and Ron just look at each other for a moment before TCE breaks their stare.)

TCE: Cage, you are an egomaniac even if you have every person here in Los Vegas, Donnie, and Backseat Ron fooled. I know you better than anyone. Even someone like Meg. How are our kids… I mean your kids doing? Damn, I let that slip.

(Cage gets ready to jump out of the ring, but Ron holds him back.)

TCE: You even have him helping you pretend that you’d actually come down here and fight me tonight. That’s adorable. Listen, let’s cut to the chase. It’s inevitable. You and me… one last time. I challenge you Cage to a match at HOSTILE FURY!

Sir Oliver: By Jove, that’s the only thing TCE has said tonight which received a positive reaction from the crowd.

TCE: And Backseat Ron… what about you and me tango in two weeks?

Lobo: TCE has laid down not one, but two challenges here tonight.

V: And away he goes.

Lobo: What will Cage and Ron Masterson have to say about that?

Sir Oliver: I do believe both will answer yes.

V: And both will regret it.

======================
The Robinsons vs. Liver & Onions
======================

Baptist: Next up, we have the debut of a promising young tag team, The Robinsons.

Sir Oliver: They sound familiar. Are you sure those chaps haven't wrestled here before?

Baptist: No, it's their debut tonight, I am pretty sure!

Sir Oliver: Hmm...

Baptist: But first we have erm... Liver and Onions."

(Two men, one wearing a fluorescent pink unitard and another neon green, walk down the aisle. They are overweight, grumpy and met with boos. One opens his armpits and the crowd nearby make stinkfaces in unison.)

*Anderson: "Hailing from Dinner, Georgia, at a combined weight of SIX HUNDRED and THIRTY TWO POUNDS... LIVER AND ONIONS!"

Crowd: "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!"

Sir Oliver: "Liver and Onions is a proper meal, yes?"

Baptist: "Whatever these guys smell like isn't proper... good grief!"

(Old school hip hop starts playing from the loudspeaker…)

"ARE YOU READY FOR THIS? Are you ready for this?"

"ARE YOU READY FOR THIS? Are you ready for this?"

"ARE YOU READY FOR THIS? Are you ready for this?"

(Two men stand atop the entrance ramp, they are black men. One towers over the other in size, but it's obvious they are brothers. The larger man is bald, but has a full beard. The smaller man is baby faced with a mini-afro. They are wearing matching orange and blue trunks and boots.)

!!!!! THAT'S THE JOINT !!!!!

(The music is "That's the joint" by Funky Four Plus 1.)

*Anderson: "Hailing from Peekskill, NY, at a combined weight of FOUR HUNDRED and SEVENTY SIX POUNDS... They are the ROBINSON FAMILY... JETT and JUMBO!"

Sir Oliver: "Oh so I get it, the one bloke Jett is fast and the other bloke is jumbo sized... am I right?"

Lobo: "You are quite observant!"

[Jumbo picks Jett up and runs down the aisle to the cheers of the crowd. Another figure appears at the top of the runway. This figure also looks related to the Jumbo and Jett
except he is in a wheelchair. He's wearing a light grey suit with an orange and blue tie matching his brothers’ trunks. He looks pissed off.]

Sir Oliver: "Well who is this?"

Baptist: "This is their manager and older brother "Junior Robinson."

Sir Oliver: "Well tell Junior to cheer up, Old Chap."

(BELL RINGS)

[Jett and Liver start the match. Jett immediately bounces against the ropes, Liver tries to grab him, but Jett ducks under him, Jett bounces off the other side and toward
Liver again, Liver goes low and tries to grab him, Jett does a cartwheel over his back, and bounces off the ropes again. Jett then runs a third time toward Liver but slides
under Liver's legs, before Liver can turn around...[

Baptist: "DROP KICK by Jett Robinson!"

(Liver gets up and is annoyed. He hurdles towards Jett, but Jett ducks low and does a mini-dropkick at his knees, Liver is on his knees and gets up. He tries it again,
another mini drop kick to the other knee, Liver is on his knees once again, dropkick to Liver and he's down!)

Sir Oliver: "This Jett is fast... you could even say he's like a... wait for it... a JET! Get it?!"

Baptist: "Oh brother."

(Liver gets up and lifts up his armpit. Jett can't take the smell. Neither can the crowd in the front row.)

Sir Oliver: God save the Queen! Have you ever heard of investing in some Old Spice?

(Jett staggers backward, Liver gets his hands on him and lifts him for a bodyslam... but Jett reverses it into a DDT! Liver gets up perplexed. He tags out to Onions. Jett tags in his brother Jumbo.)

The two face off in the ring. Jumbo flexes his large biceps at Onion. Onion turns around farts... anyone in a 100 foot vicinity is not pleased!)

Baptist: Wow, help these men!

(Jumbo clenches his nose, but he's not about to let Onions get the best of him. He hits Onions with a few well placed jabs. They look very well placed and precise.)

Baptist: "Jumbo and Jett are the sons of Jab Robinson and those jabs are certainly approved by the Jibba Jabba himself!"

(Onions staggers, Jumbo picks Onion for a bodyslam. He tags his brother in, who jumps off the top rope for a moonsault. Jumbo follows up with a standing splash before he goes back to the ropes. Jett picks Onions up, and gets a HUGE WHIFF OF FART RIGHT IN HIS FACE! He can't take it!)

Sir Oliver: "Can their bodily functions be considered weapons? It certainly feels like they have an unfair advantage here!"

(Onions picks Jett up for a fallaway slam! He picks him up again, tags Liver in, they throw Jett against the ropes, and wind their forearms up for dual clotheslines…)

Baptist: "Jett ducks under... DROPKICK TO BOTH MEN!"

(Jett pushes Onions out of the ring. Liver gets up and is dazed. Jumbo picks up Liver... for a powerbomb. Jett goes to the ropes…)

Baptist: "Frog splash from the top rope... ROBINSON COMBINATION SPECIAL!"

(Jett goes for the pin…)

Edwards: "1.... 2... 3!!!!!"

(BELL RINGS)

Sir Oliver: "I liked those Robinsons... but Liver & Onions I hope shower well if they ever return.

(Liver and Onions roll out of the ring. The boys’ manager, Junior, is by the announcers table with a microphone in hand!)

Junior: "We have been studying and studying and studying the tag team division in UP Wrestling. And we believe that we have what it takes to get to the top. It won't be today, it won't be tomorrow, but it will be soon. Me and my brothers, Jumbo and Jett, we come from a lineage started by my father, Jab Robinson..We are a family that pursues excellence like no other. My brother Jumbo, was an all-star nose tackle in college, Jett was a champion track and field athlete. Myself, I wrestled before… unfortunate circumstances occurred.

I say all of this to put the UP Wrestling Tag Team Division on notice and to make our goals and intentions clear:

Public Nuisance. We will see you soon.

Wicked... We will see you soon.

Team Sp!ke... We will see you soon.

House Salvaje, THC, Rated M...

Last but not least... DIsorganized Chaos. We may be young and new, but you will eventually see us. We believe that our family, the Robinson family, is the best there is, and in time you will all feel the same."

=====================
Rain Blackhart vs. Mark Murphy
=====================

Sir Oliver: It will be an absolute pleasure to watch a real professional.

Lobo: Rain Blackhart has made it known that he wants the Sin City Championship and will do whatever it takes to win the title from its holder Dillian DeHaven.

Sir Oliver: No better way to send DeHaven a message than to defeat his tag team partner, Mark Murphy.

V: Like, do you like my nails?

*Anderson: Coming down the aisle with his manager, Cliff Ragsdale, weighing in at 265 pounds, I give you "THE MANIAC" MARK MURPHY!

("Fire Water Burn" By The Bloodhound Gang plays as Murphy makes his way to the ring, being led by his manager, Cliff Ragsdale. Murphy laughs at the fans, and sometimes points out different fans and makes fun of them. Ragsdale is wearing a blue cape/shirt with black jeans. Murphy is wearing a blue singlet.)

Lobo: Mark Murphy has been frustrated by his in-ring performance lately and seems to have lost some confidence.

Sir Oliver: It can happen. Especially when you feel inferior to your tag team partner.

Lobo: It is up to maybe Cliff Ragsdale to help Murphy get this big win.

V: Here comes Rain and like, that music. That is so last century.

*Anderson: From Lexington, Kentucky... he stands at five foot eleven inches tall and weighs in tonight at two hundred and ten pounds... I give to you RAIN BLACKHART!!!

("Still Unbroken" by Lynard Skynyrd to play as Rain walks out to the ring with his manager, Terrance Christopher.)

*Anderson: Your referee for this match is Alexander Xavier Edwards.

Sir Oliver: The bell rings and the smaller but quicker Blackhart points at Murphy and he is seemingly mocking his girth?

Lobo: Yes, he is shaming Murphy, who looks to be very angry.

Sir Oliver: Ragsdale is yelling at Murphy to pay attention as Blackhart slaps him in the face and smirks.

Lobo: Murphy lunges at Blackhart, who adroitly reverses him and pushes the big man into the corner. Before Edwards can break them up, Blackhart unleashes a bevy of chops to the chest and then a series of elbow strikes.

Sir Oliver: Blackhart is quick but look at Murphy.

V: Oh my like that looks like it had no effect on the man.

Lobo: Murphy grabs Blackhart around the neck and whips him across the ring. As Blackhart gets up Murphy grabs him and tosses him into the turnbuckle.

V: Ouch, looks like that hurt, like really hurt.

Lobo: Murphy is smashing Blackhart’s face into the turnbuckle as Ragsdale cheers him on.

Sir Oliver: Murphy is smartly working on the face and neck, weakening his opponent to set him up for his Flamethrower.

Lobo: Murphy with a kick to the gut, he whips Blackhart into the ropes, POWESLAM!

Sir Oliver: Precision from Mark Murphy.

Lobo: We have the cover…..1….2….KICK OUT.

V: Impressive that Rain got the fat guy off him.

Lobo: Murphy in disgust picks up Blackhart and throws him into the ropes again, he goes for the rolling clothesline but Blackhart holds up and slides out of the ring to regroup.

Sir Oliver: Smartly, Blackhart is taking a breather.

Lobo: Before the referee can count, Murphy chases after Blackhart but Blackhart immediately slides back into the ring and as Murphy follows, Blackhart unleashes kicks and knees on Murphy.

V: That is like such a rookie mistake by like not a rookie. I will have to shame Murphy on Tik Tok for that one.

Lobo: With the bigger man stunned, Blackhart picks him up and delivers a finely executed T-Bone Suplex. Blackhart immediately pounces on the prone opponent and puts on the ankle lock.

Sir Oliver: Rain Blackhart is smartly using his submission techniques to keep the big man down.

Lobo: Murphy, pulls himself up and crawls to the ropes forcing Edwards to break the count. Blackhart charges into Murphy and nails a forearm to the lower back. He pushes him to the middle of the ring and applies an Octopus stretch.

V: That looks painful. Like, no thanks.

Lobo: Ragsdale is screaming at Murphy as Edwards checks on him. Sweat drips down Murphy’s brow as he powers up and tosses Blackhart off him. Blackhart immediately rushes him but Murphy catches him in a SPINEBUSTER. Murphy is up staring at the crowd who actually cheer.

Sir Oliver: You need to stay on your opponent.

Lobo: Murphy picks up Blackhart and hits a nasty looking SHOULDER BREAKER! Blackhart hits hard and again rolls out of the ring clutching his left shoulder.

Sir Oliver: Murphy is not following him outside. He is telling him to climb back in.

V: Edwards is counting and is at five as Blackhart rolls back in. And like he is not moving as fast now.

Lobo: Murphy pounces with a series of kicks. He grabs Blackhart and goes for the reverse DDT but Blackhart slips out. Blackhart with an eye rake and he follows up with a FLATLINER. COVER!

Edwards: 1…. 2...

Lobo: Murphy bench presses Blackhart off him and tosses him.

Sir Oliver: That is such strength.

Lobo: Murphy lets out a primal scream and rushes Blackhart. The men exchange blows but the bigger Murphy gets the better of the exchange. Tomahawk chop for Murphy and Blackhart goes down to one knee. Now Murphy continues to the chops. Blackhart is down. Murphy picks up Blackhart and whips him into the ropes. Rolling Clothesline!!!

Sir Oliver: Rain Blackhart is in serious trouble as Terrance Christopher is yelling at the referee. Murphy has a deranged look in his eyes. What is he doing?

Lobo: Murphy is going to the top rope. He is looking for a flying elbow smash but he slips.

Sir Oliver: Why is Murphy looking for a high risk maneuver? He had Blackhart down!?

V: What a cluts.

Lobo: Murphy loses his footing and slips down. Rain jumps up and applies the TAZZMISSION. Murphy is in the middle of the ring and Blackhart is using his body weight and leverage.

Sir Oliver: Murphy is slipping fast.

V: Like Murphy had the match won. What a loser.

Lobo: Ragsdale is screaming as the Referee calls for the bell.

Sir Oliver: Murphy passed out. This will not go well when he awakens.

V: No wonder his wife like left him. Ugly and stupid is no way to go through life. Like no way.

*Anderson: Your winner in eight minutes and thirty-two seconds…. The Professional… RAIN BLACKHEART!!!

Lobo: Look at Rain. He beckons Dillian DeHaven to come into the ring.

Sir Oliver: And here comes the other half of Public Nuisance. DeHaven and Blackhart are staring at one another.

Lobo: DeHaven is motioning to step back as he is coming in but now, no. He jumps back down.

Lobo: Rain is smirking. He walks over to Murphy who is waking up from the Tazzmission. Rain applies the CALF CRUSHER.

Sir Oliver: Murphy is screaming in pain!! DeHaven is annoyed. He jumps on the apron but now jumps back down and walks away? He is leaving his partner in pain. What is happening?

V: Like Rain is definitely sending a message. He wants DeHaven’s championship.

Lobo: Rain finally releases the hold as Ragsdale looks on in disgust.

Sir Oliver: The fans are yelling you tapped out while booing DeHaven at the same time. This is so humiliating for the big man.

===================
Wicked vs. House of Salvaje
===================

Lobo: What can we say about this next match that wasn’t said last time?.

V: That it was, like, totally an awesome fight and we want more of the same.

Sir Oliver: I doubt that you shall be in any way disappointed, young lady. Neither team has a predilection for restraint..

*Anderson: Coming to the ring....THE baddest and bestest of friends....UPW's fierce and ferocious...Maddox and Candy but also known as the "Haus of Salvaje"!

("Runway" by Duke Dumont blares throughout the arena. The arena goes completely pitch black and white lights start to flicker. Two giant lights peek out from the top of the ramp and two silhouettes stand in front of the lights. The fans start screaming throughout the arena. Spotlights hit the two figures and the lights go up in the arena. Maddox and Candy look at each other and smile. They are both dressed in destroyed denim shorts: Maddox in mid thigh length and Candy with booty shorts and both with a dark purple crop top and black combat boots. They strut down the runway in tandem. Once they get to the bottom, they both slide into the ring, stand in the center of the ring and take in the fans.)

*Anderson: And their opponents….

Anderson: UP Wrestling proudly presents - Vicious and Vile! The team that can only be - WICKED!!!

(The lights drop. The heavy pulsating beat of "Hearse of the Pharaohs" by Witchery thunders out from the PA system. Slowly the lights gradually brighten to reveal a fog shrouded ramp, onto which step Wicked. A giant, dark haired brute of a man stands next to a beautiful, but hard featured woman. Both are clad entirely in black. That black is only broken by matching blood red inverted pentacles on their vests. The crowds BOOS loudly, but the pair merely scowl at them as they arrogantly make their way to the ring.)

Sir Oliver: Is it me, or is Miss Vile smirking far more than is her customary practice?.

Lobo: No, she sure looks like the cat that got the cream.

(Vicious steps over the ropes to enter the ring. Vile slithers through them, hands behind her back. Vicious shoves Anderson aside and Vile one-handedly stiff arms Edwards. She walks over to Candy and stops five feet from her. Vile then brings her other hand from behind her back. She is holding a GUN! And pointing it at Candy’s head.)

V: Oh fuck.

Lobo: Damn! She’s going to SHOOT her!

Sir Oliver: Well, that’s certainly one way of settling a score and most permanently at that.

(Anderson yells for Security and a scowling CJ Walker heads out from the back. With him are two heavily tattooed men. With the slightest flick of his wrist, CJ sends them off in different directions; neither heads directly towards the ring, unlike CJ.)

V: Hey, do you think that Walker will get shot too. That would be like, so funny!

Lobo: That gun is not fazing him at all. He’s either incredibly brave or stupid. Candy is wisely holding her hands up and backing away slowly. Maddox looks to make a move, but Vicious steps forward ready to intercept and Maddox sensibly holds his place.

V: He should have like, totally gone for it and gotten shot to pieces! Just think of all the blood spraying all over the place. Awesome.

Sir Oliver: I declare, your obsession with blood borders on the vampiric.

Lobo: Now Walker approaches the ring. Vicious waves a single finger at him and grins. He’s certainly ready to mix it with – WHOA! Where’d HE come from?

Sir Oliver: By George! That was one of Mr CJ Walker’s elite Security cadre – The Niflheim Yakuza, I believe.

Lobo: Well, wherever he found them, he found some quality. That was fast! He knocks Vile to the mat and they wrestle for the gun. Another! The other man darts in and – OOF! Gets met by Vicious’ boot, but CJ is IN!

V: And like, so are Candy and Maddox!

Lobo: It’s a mad brawl with Wicked taking on FIVE people and – WHAT?

V: Hahaha!

Sir Oliver: My word! The trigger was pulled in the melee and – it’s a water pistol!

V: A goddam Squirt Gun. I fucking love it!

Lobo: The ‘gun’ is taken and CJ and his men simply walk away with it.

Sir Oliver: No fuss, no grandstanding; how exemplary.

Lobo: Anderson and Edwards are now in discussion. Will they let this fight proceed or….?

V: They’d better have, coz like, those four really want to rip each other apart.

Sir Oliver: I concur. And let us not forget; this is a no disqualifications or count out match, so they can hardly disqualify Miss Vile for her enterprise – albeit as frightfully shocking as it was.

Lobo: That gun was incredibly realistic. It had me fooled.

V: Yeah, funny as that was, it was kinda disappointing. I mean – no blood!

Sir Oliver: I don’t think you’ll have long to wait for that matter to be corrected – should Mr Anderson deign to permit this contest to proceed.

Lobo: I don’t think he has a choice. They’re going to fight whatever he decides!

(BELL RINGS)

Lobo: And there’s the bell!

Sir Oliver: Yes, and just like the previous occasion, there is complete disregard for the rules. All four are in the ring. Mr Anderson AND Mr Edwards vacate the ring. Wisely, I would add.

Lobo: Candy leaps at Vile, but Vicious CATCHESs her in mid air and she never reaches her intended target. He looks to hurl her – NO! Maddox crashes into him with a thunderous Drop Kick! That pushes the behemoth back a step and he drops Candy, who immediately spins – low and fast. She sweeps Vicious off his feet!

Sir Oliver: Splendid teamwork from the Haus of Salvaje, I must say, Old Bean.

Lobo: But Vile is up and leaps to blast Candy with a knee to the side of her head.

Sir Oliver: By Jove! That rattled more than a few teeth, I’ll wager.

Lobo: Maddox darts to the ropes. He jumps and bounces up and out. Firebird Splash! He nails it and Vicious ate all of that!

V: Yeah, but look over there. Candy is totally getting her face rearranged by Vile.

Lobo: Yeah, that’s a whole AVALANCHE of punches. Candy is bloodied!

V: Like awesome!

Lobo: But she manages to block and then roll backwards to escape that brutal assault. Vile follows and walks straight into a Spear. Candy takes her down – fast and hard - and now it’s her turn to unload a barrage onto Vile.

Sir Oliver: Who very wisely covers up.

Lobo: Maddox grabs Vicious by the head and pulls him to – NO! Vicious uses his extra reach and fires up a Palm Strike. It catches Maddox square in the chest and LIFTS him bodily off of Vicious!

Sir Oliver: Astounding, truly astounding.

V: Yeah, like, I bet that Maddox thinks so too.

Lobo: Candy abruptly switches tactics and hooking a leg, rolls Vile up!

Edwards: ONE!

Sir Oliver: Yes, I see that Mr Edwards is most sagaciously counting from OUTSIDE the ring.

Edwards: TWO!

Lobo: And Vicious back hands Maddox into the ropes.

Sir Oliver: Too little, too late, mayhap?

Edwards: THRE’-

Lobo: She kicks out! Vile kicks out and then -

V: Love it!

Lobo: Eye rake! That forces Candy back. There’s nothing technical about Vile’s approach. She’s simply kicking Candy around the ring now. Oh, but here comes Maddox. He darts towards Vicious. NO! It’s a feint. He goes UNDER the wide flung arm and crashes into Vile with a Twisting Senton Bomb!

Sir Oliver: And again, laudable teamwork.

Lobo: Now Candy rolls to her feet. She and Maddox grab Vile: an arm each and they run and LAUNCH her! Over the ropes!

V: Wow! Like, look at the air she took then.

Lobo: Vile crashes down.

V: Big style!

Lobo: But Vicious runs up behind them and Double Lariat! He sends BOTH Candy and Maddox tumbling OVER the ropes too!

Sir Oliver: Matters are in no way de-escalating. I foresee a great deal of pain and suffering.

V: Yeah YOURS if don’t shut up and let me like, totally enjoy this carnage!

Lobo: Maddox bounced off the apron and fell to the concrete. He’s not far from Vile, who is still flat out after that epic flight and brutal landing. Candy though, she managed to hang onto the ropes. She’s on the apron.

V: Not for long.

Lobo: Vicious kicks, even as she starts to pull herself up.

Sir Oliver: My, but that was a substantial shoeing and no mistake.

Lobo: Candy drops down.

V: Like she had a choice.

Lobo: Maddox crawls over and drops on top of Vile!

Sir Oliver: And Mr Edwards heroically scurries around to make the count. He really is quite the redoubtable fellow, is he not?

Edwards: ONE!

Lobo: Vicious steps OVER those ropes, Candy stands ready to stop him.

V: Yeah, good luck with that, Bitch.

Edwards: TWO!!

V: She’d have more luck trying to stop a charging elephant.

Sir Oliver: For once, I find myself in the extremely unusual position of being in complete agreement with you.

Edwards: THREE!

Lobo: Maddox GOT HER!

V: Nope. He didn’t.

Sir Oliver: Alas, Miss Wu is correct. Somehow the tenacious Miss Vile contrived to get a shoulder up just before Mr Edwards’ hand struck the floor.

V: And like, here comes Vicious!

Lobo: He jumps!

V: Shit!

Lobo: He crashes into Candy AND Maddox, knocking him off Vile and absolutely CRUSHING Candy!

Sir Oliver: That is indeed a substantial amount a muscle landing upon her, Old Bean.

V: #SPLATTED!

Lobo: Maddox kicks out at Vicious’ head. That caught him real good.

Sir Oliver: “Real good”? Surely you aren’t proposing to pass that appalling phrase as acceptable English?

V: Like, can it, Old Dude! There’s action to call.

Lobo: Maddox kicks again. That snaps Vicious’ head to the side. Now Maddox stands and starts to haul the monster off of Candy. Believe me, that is NOT an easy task. Vicious must weigh, what – three hundred pounds plus!

Sir Oliver: Indeed so, but he is applying his mind and peeling the giant away, rather than attempting to actually LIFT him.

Lobo: He’s done it! Candy is free and -

V: Just say it, Old Man, she’s a fucking MESS! Course, I reckon anyone would be after having THAT crash land on theirr fucking head.

Lobo: Candy seems stunned. She’s trying to shake it off, but it was a massive hit. But Vicious IS shaking off those head shots.

Sir Oliver: Indeed, it takes a truly epic amount of damage to keep that monster down.

Lobo: Maddox turns, leaving Candy propped against the steps. He jumps, two footed, to crash down onto Vicious’ broad back, pile driving him back into the concrete. Now he drops and unloads blow after blow to the back of Vicious’ head.

Sir Oliver: And our enthusiastic patrons are delighting in counting along. How barbaric.

Lobo: Despite that onslaught, Vicious keeps trying to push up and that’s with Maddox sitting on his back!

V: Yeah well, all those blows have opened up the back of his head. Blood! Lot’s of it. Like, that’ll slow him down for sure.

Sir Oliver: Are you quite certain that your ancestry does not, at some point, include a leech or several?

Lobo: Vicious is weakening. Maddox is wearing him down!

Sir Oliver: Quite so, his tenacity is to be commended.

Lobo: Oh look! Now Candy is pulling herself up. She is standing!

Sir Oliver: Top hole! Just how tough is that young lady?

V: Tough enough to withstand that chair shot?

Lobo: Damn! I got so fixated watching Maddox and Vicious, I lost sight of Vile getting up.

Sir Oliver: And get up she most assuredly did, Old Boy.

V: Like what a shot! That was like a gunshot. For reals.

Lobo: Candy never saw it. She was looking to help Maddox. Vile totally blindsided her.

V: Great, wasn’t it?

Lobo: Now Vile drops to cover Candy!

Sir Oliver: Yes, but Mr Maddox has also finally managed to subdue Vicious and is seemingly only just aware of what is transpiring behind his back

Edwards: ONE!

Lobo: Damn, this is a close one.

Edwards: TWO!!

V: Like, no it isn’t.

Sir Oliver: Indeed, Mr Maddox propels himself with great alacrity towards Miss Candy. Surely he will -

Edwards: THREE!!!

Lobo: Vile did it! She gets the win, but Maddox crashes into her, evicting her from Candy. Vicious is already pushing himself back up. These guys do NOT look like they’re finished.

Anderson: Ladies and Gentlemen – your winners! - WICKED!!!

Lobo: NOT popular, not a popular result at all. Oh, and here come the Niflheim Yakuza – in force. This match IS over – at least for now. They are separating the wrestlers, but not before Vile SPITS on Candy!

Sir Oliver: How disgraceful!

Lobo: Yeah, that’s really fired up the crowd here.

V: Like, what’s the big deal? Vile totally won. That’s the main thing.

Sir Oliver: We evidently have very different priorities, Miss Wu.

V: Yeah, like thank god for that!

Lobo: That was a wild match and I doubt that it’s resolved anything between those two teams. Haus of Salvaje again showed their superior teamwork, but Wicked showed that there’s no depths they won’t sink to, to hurt people.

Sir Oliver: Well, I for one hope that our next match is one that leaves a less bitter taste in one’s mouth.

Lobo: We’ll soon find out as it’s coming right up.

V: Great. More blood!

=======
Backstage
=======

(Mark Murphy is limping towards his locker room after receiving medical attention. Earlier in the evening, Rain Blackhart sent a clear message through him to Dillian DeHaven. Mark is alone. There is no sign of Cliff, Dillian, or Nathaniel. Mark looks frustrated, down, and still in pain.

He walks up to the door and tries to push it forward. The door doesn’t budge. Mark tries again with the same result. His frustration level appears to rise and he slams his fist into the door. Something clicks and his next motion is a much nicer knock.

No one opens the door. After a few awkward moments pass, Mark is resigned to give up and start limping away. Nearby is catering. Chad is fixing a plate. While no longer an employee of UP Wrestling, he was used as a decoy by TCE. It appears that not working for the company has not swayed him from eating free food that is designated for employees and special guests.)

Chad: Must blow to be you. Aren’t you the guy whose wife left him because of your loyalty to Cliff and his gang? Looks like they tossed you aside too.

(Mark starts heading towards Chad.)

Chad: Want to try this dip? It tastes like shi…

(Before Chad can finish his sentence, Mark socks him in the jaw, sending Chad sprawling and his plate of food flying. Mark continues his attack punching Chad repeatedly. He starts dumping food all over Chad and eventually slams him through a table. As Mark gets down to start a mounted punch, a hand lands on his shoulder.)

Voice: Miss me?

(Mark Murphy gets turned around by a former UP Wrestling World and Tag Team Champion, Bryan Black. Mark tries to get the first swing in, but Black blocks it and clubs Murphy with a back elbow. Mark stumbles back and Black grabs him to hit an atomic drop. He connects and lands it just right to make Murphy’s night inches worse.

Black pulls up Murphy and brings him over to a vanity. He looks down on Murphy, breathes in hard, and yells out as he smashes Mark face first into the mirror. Mark drops to the ground after his face shatters the glass. A trickle of blood starts going down his forehead as Bryan stands over him.

Bryan looks over and goes towards Chad. He offers him a hand which is reluctantly taken. Black helps Chad up and heads off screen.)

Lobo: Bryan Black has returned!

Sir Oliver: Ah it is so good to see Mr. Black.

V: Ugh… like, who likes that loser.

Lobo: Bryan has one of the best hearts in the business. Without him, UP Wrestling may never have gotten over our early financial woes. He’s our first world champion. Hell, he even helped out a horrible human being in Chad.

Sir Oliver: There may have been a bit of revenge mixed in there too from what happened to Larry.

Lobo: Yes, that too. I am just happy to see him back!

V: He’d better not rejoin the Alliance. Devy and the rest of the Black Hand are going to destroy everyone in their way. Bryan should just keep to plotting his revenge on Cliff’s group.

Lobo: I know we’ll soon hear of all Bryan’s intentions now that he’s returned and I am looking forward to it.

=================
CJ Walker vs. David Berg
=================

Sir Oliver: Well, I really must say -

V: Must you?

Sir Oliver: Yes, as a matter of fact I absolutely must, young lady. You see coming right up we have a very exciting in ring debut and no easy one at that.

Lobo: You’re not wrong. This is going to be a fascinating match; so let’s join Elijah Anderson for the introductions.

*Anderson: Now making his way to the ring, From Butcher's Hollow in The Ozarks of Arkansas. He stands 6'7 and One Half inches tall. Weighing in at 277 pounds. The Vengeful One, CJ Walker!"

("Valhalla Calling Me" by Miracle Of Sound (Metal Version) begins to play as Walker is seen standing at an entry tunnel in the arena where the fans enter and exit. He is dressed in jeans, black boots, and his "Come Hell Or Valhalla" sleeveless shirt. The fans reach out to touch their hero as he begins to descend the steps down towards the ring side area. Pushing his way through the sea of fans towards the barricade he hops the barricade with a hand carved mahogany club in his hand, the club is adorned with Norse runes and a snarling wolf. Walker takes his time to circle around the ring. His eyes scanning the crowd and whoever is in the ring. He climbs up slowly onto the apron, stopping there to look back at the crowd then turns his focus into the ring. He steps between the ropes with the club in his taped fist, ready to crack skulls and brutalize his opponent.)

Lobo: CJ sure looks ready and focused for this one.

*Anderson: And his opponent – for the FIRST TIME EVER in a UPW ring - Hailing from Jerusalem, in Israel. He stands 6'3 and he weighs 235 pounds. He is the King of the Streets, David Berg!

(“Civil War” by Guns N' Roses begins to play as the fans look over. As the song picks up steam, David Berg walks out. He is wearing dark black camouflage pants, no shirt and holds a giant Israeli flag as he saunters to the ring to a mixed reaction. He places the flag near the announcers and then adroitly hops over the ring ropes, ready for action. The look on his face is consistently stoic with a twinge of anger and annoyance)

Sir Oliver: It seems that Mr Berg is cut from similar cloth, albeit a much smaller piece, what?

(BELL RINGS)

Lobo: There’s no delay as Edwards calls for the bell and this one immediately gets underway. CJ unhesitatingly closes on Berg. A huge left!

Sir Oliver: Misses! By Jove, that was a deft bit of dodging there, Old Boy.

Lobo: Berg spins and whips that foot around to blast CJ in the gut.

Sir Oliver: And the big man simply takes it.

Lobo: Berg spins again and chops at the neck. NO! CJ catches the arm and fires off an elbow smash into the gut that almost takes Berg off his hit.

Sir Oliver: Almost? Pish-posh! He clearly did cause Mr Berg’s feet to lose contact with the ground.

Lobo: Now CJ grabs Berg by the head and spins to whip him – by the head! - into the ropes.

Sir Oliver: By George! The fellow almost took the man’s head off!

V: Like too bad, coz this match totally needs some bloodshed.

Lobo: Berg hits the ropes and grabs them. There’s no flying back out. He flexes his neck feeling out the strain that CJ just put it under.

Sir Oliver: No surprise there. Really, the only surprise is that Mr Berg can still function so well.

Lobo; But will he after THIS? CJ piles in and it’s a HUGE Body slam. He crushes Berg intro the ropes and as they bounce out suplexes him up and over!

Sir Oliver: My word! Did you see the height of that throw?

V: Yeah, but he like, he totally landed with a Break Fall and didn’t snap his neck. Dullsville.

Lobo: CJ is quickly back to his feet. Over he strides. He bends, pulls Berg up by the hair and -

Sir Oliver: Well, that had to hurt.

Lobo: Yeah, that was a solid blow to the ribs. Berg surprised CJ with the speed and power of that response. CJ releases and backs up a step. Berg stands fully and flexes his shoulders and back.

Sir Oliver: Quite so, Old Bean, they took rather a knock from that frightfully high fall.

Lobo: Both men close. There’s a flurry of chops, smashes and blows from both men. Berg seems to be landing more, but CJ’s seem to pack more power. Really, there’s nothing between them and Berg ducks under a haymaker.

Sir Oliver: One that would most assuredly have decapitated him, had it struck true.

Lobo: Gutbuster! Damn, Berg got into position for that real quick.

Sir Oliver: It was indisputably a solid hit, Old Chap. Even the mighty Mr Walker felt that one.

Lobo: Now Berg sets him up to – No CJ is pushing him off. Back hand chop! That spins Berg around and CJ strikes again – Switch Kick!

Sir Oliver: A deft move from such a large man.

Lobo: That knocks Berg to the mat. CJ stamps down.

Sir Oliver: Squarely on the man’s chest. That’ll affect his breathing and thus his stamina.

Lobo: CJ now bends and Berg fires ANOTHER shot to the ribs! CJ grimaces, but doesn’t release! He hoists Berg up and – Choke Slam!

Sir Oliver: My-oh-my, there was a proliferation of determination in those moves, was there not? I tip my hat to the redoubtable fellow. Most commendable.

Lobo: Berg is stunned after that monster hit. CJ drops to cover.

Edwards: ONE! - TWO!! -

Lobo: He kicks out!

Sir Oliver: And with considerable vim and vigour.

Lobo: Walker breaks cleanly. Berg rolls to the side and is quickly back up. Both men circle for a moment and then – Leg lariat!

Sir Oliver: By Jove! One doesn’t see a great many of those these days and executed with such aplomb. How simply splendid.

Lobo: I don’t think that CJ agrees. That caught him and caught him well. He’s down and Berg scampers around to apply – The Iron Dome!

Sir Oliver: The what? I can only assume it’s some overly dramatic sobriquet for that Triangle Choke, but what THAT has to do with an Iron Dome, I simply do not know.

V: Don’t like, get your tighty whities in a twist. As names go, it ain’t total crap, you know. As a move? D’uh! Like, where’s the blood?

Lobo: Berg’s applying that mercilessly and seems to have CJ in serious trouble.

Sir Oliver: Perhaps, but Mr Walker is a big unit and -SEE! He’s managed to get a foot to the rope! Top Hole!

Lobo: Edwards calls for the break and gets it. Berg breaks as cleanly as CJ did previously, but now it’s CJ’s turn to test his joints and make sure there are no niggling injuries.

Sir Oliver: Oh, I’m confident that a robust chap such as he is still in tip-top condition.

Lobo: It’s mere seconds before both men close again. Berg charges in, but is scooped up by Walker – Falling Powerbomb! Damn, that was monstrous! CJ scoots around and covers!

Edwards: ONE! - TWO!! -

Lobo: Shoulder up!

Sir Oliver: And with some gusto. This Mr Berg chap seems rather unrelenting, wouldn’t you say?

Lobo: He’s impressed, that’s for sure, but let’s be honest here: anything LESS and you’re just not going to survive against CJ Walker.

V: Like, let’s get real here. So Walker’s big. And? He’s no Devy, so stop trying to pretend that he is.

Sir Oliver: No one was ‘pretending’ anything, Young Lady. Mr Walker’s credentials are well documented. As, I hasten to add, are Mr Bishop’s, WHO, it is worth noting, is NOT in this match; so can we PLEASE focus on what is transpiring in the ring at this present moment in time?

V: Like, don’t have a coronary or shit. I was just saying.

Lobo: Both men are again trading blows in the centre of the ring. Berg is mainly going for the stomach and ribs. CJ is more focused on head shots. Those don’t hit often, but – damn, when they do, they totally disrupt Berg’s flow. And there’s another! CJ follows the staggered Berg and scoops him up – another chokeslam to – NO! Berg fires off a knee that blasts CJ in those abused ribs. CJ drops Berg, but Berg can’t take advantage.

Sir Oliver: Indeed not; he’s presently far too occupied with the decidedly essential task of actually getting air into his lungs.

V: Shit. “Breathing” Why can’t you just say “breathing”? Why make it all so fucking long winded and shit? Just get to the damn point.

Lobo: CJ recovers faster. He closes. Big Discus Boot!

Sir Oliver: Followed by an exemplary Jumping Spinning Roundhouse Kick!

Lobo: Yeah and Berg took both. He’s rocked back into the corner. CJ grabs an arm and pulls him out to – NO! Ripcord Short Arm Clothesline! It blasts Berg back into the corner and he looks to be in trouble here.

Sir Oliver: Well, that most assuredly was quite a combination of powerful shots he just took, Old Boy.

Lobo: Now he pulls Berg out again. This one is a Heart – NO! Berg twists and partially blocks what was looking like Walker’s finisher.

Sir Oliver: Yes; he’s not signalled it, but perchance he was intent on using a slightly less fatal version to soften Mr Berg up for the subsequent ‘killer’ blow.

Lobo: Now CJ pulls Berg out. Monkey Flip! Berg crashes down and Walker rolls to apply the pin.

Edwards: ONE!

Lobo: He’s got a leg held, so that’ll restrict Berg’s options.

Edwards: TWO!!

Sir Oliver: Yes, and he’s taken some serious blows, to boot.
Edwards: THRE’-

Lobo: Kick out! Berg survives!

Sir Oliver: Indeed he does. JUST.

Lobo: Walker stands. Berg rolls aside and swiftly to his feet. Walker again flexes and stretches out his ribs.

Sir Oliver: They have taken quite the pounding in this match.

Lobo: Berg side steps, crabbing to his left. Now Walker rushes in, arms spread, he’s going to – NO! The “1947”! - Flying Spinning Side Kick!

Sir Oliver: Straight into those ribs.

Lobo: What a hit and he follows up with a Turning kick, a hook kick – they strike alternate sides of the ribcage. CJ roars in frustration and brings both hands together. A huge Double Handed Sledgehammer blow catches Berg and sends him into the ropes. Out he comes – Missile Drop kick! Down goes CJ!

V: Never mind that! Look! Walker opened up Berg’s lip! We got BLOOD!

Sir Oliver: Indeed we go, but will it slow Mr Berg? That’s the key point, is it not?

Lobo: Let’s see. NO! The Hebrew Hammer! Berg hits his Curb Stomp finisher!

Sir Oliver: And again! He’s clearly not taking any chances with Mr Walker, nor do I blame him.

Edwards: ONE!

Lobo: Berg is down for the pin.

Edwards: TWO!!

Sir Oliver: I say what a simply delightful exhibition of martial prowess we’ve just witnessed.

Edwards: THREE!

Lobo: He got him! That’s – no, wait. Edwards is saying that CJ got a shoulder up JUST before his hand hit!

Sir Oliver: My word! How extraordinary!

Lobo: Berg puts his head in his hands. It took TWO Hammers to put Walker down and yet he STILL managed to beat the count, albeit JUST.

V: Hey, like maybe we’ll get to see more blood.

Lobo: Berg stands, refocuses. Walker gets up and is immediately hit with ANOTHER sidekick.

Sir Oliver: Right in the old bread basket!

Lobo: CJ grabs for the leg, but misses. Berg drops low, Russian Sweep! Down goes Walker. Curb Stomp! Stomp to the head and now The Hebrew Hammer falls for a THIRD time!

Sir Oliver: By George! Mr Walker has taken a great deal of punishment, but it seems that no amount of trauma is sufficient to permanently incapacitate him!

Lobo: But Berg has dropped and covered.

Edwards: ONE!

Lobo: It looks like he may well have Walker this time.

Edwards: TWO!!

V: Yeah, like you totally said that LAST time and look what happened.

Edwards: THREE!!!

Lobo: He did it! Berg wins!

Anderson: Ladies and Gentlemen – your WINNER – DAVID BERG!!!

Sir Oliver: Quite the reception for both men. Truly they both contributed to an exceptional and memorable debut.

V: Yeah, whatever, but at least there was like, a bit of blood.

Lobo: It was a great fight and honestly, I feel it could have gone either way, but congratulations to David Berg on the win.

Sir Oliver: Quite so, quite so, Old Boy and let’s hope that the next match is equal to this in quality and sportsmanship.

V: Nah, let’s hope there’s like shitloads of blood and carnage.

==========================================
UP Wrestling World Openweight Championship Contract Signing
Featuring: Devin Bishop & Nathaniel
==========================================

Bishop: By now...everyone knows why we are here. Nathaniel, you did what a lot of people couldn't do, and that is earn a shot at the UPW World Openweight Championship. Let's not speak half truths and say that you alone earned it. Cliff Ragsdale and Brittany both had a hand in your victory over Pixilicious and that's leaving a lot of people asking the question...does Nathaniel deserve the shot?

(Bishop lowers his sunglasses and finally removes them, leaning nonchalantly in the chair.)

Bishop: It doesn't take a genius to figure out that at least a portion of your success is thanks to the fact that you have those two in your corner. I'll admit, it isn't a bad formula. It has gotten you this far, and for that, I commend you. I won't lie to you,..I won't lie to these fans…and most importantly, I won't lie to myself. You are strong, you are skilled, you are determined, and probably most importantly, you are intense. I could delude myself into thinking you aren't a threat, but I won't allow myself to do that. That would be foolish, and the last thing anyone can accuse Devin Bishop of is being a fool.

(Bishop looks down at the contract in front of him and picks up the pen as if he's going to sign it, then begins to twirl it in his fingers as he leans back into the chair.)

Bishop: You know...a whole lot of people probably think I'm outmatched here. With Ragsdale and Brittany in your corner, doing what they do, your size and strength, your brutal nature, your...mean streak...how will I ever possibly overcome those odds? What kind of strategy can I employ to defy those odds and walk away as champion? It looks pretty grim, to be honest.

(Bishop leans forward in the chair and lets the pen hover over the contract, then slowly leans back into the chair, a devilish grin on his face. Nathaniel is rolling his eyes and looking over at Ragsdale, who is twiddling his thumbs.)

Bishop: Getting a bit impatient there, Nathaniel? Ragsdale? How about you? Brittany?

(Brittany shoots Bishop a dirty look.)

Bishop: I would want this to be over quickly if I were you too, but that's one difference between us. Something I've always had in spades is patience. I know exactly what my strategy will be at Hostile Fury when I defend MY Openweight Championship against you Nathaniel. I'm going to get out of bed at four a.m. just like I always do. I'm going to hit the gym, like I do each and every day. I'm going to have a light lunch with my lovely lady Vee Wu, probably sashimi. Then I'm going to Watanabe's dojo to roll on the mats with some of the finest athletes Japan has to offer. Then I'll watch each and every match you've ever had, just like I've been doing since you won the chance to face me. I'm also going to watch the video of you beating up Larry over and over. Why? Because by the time we reach Hostile Fury, I'm going to know how you move your body better than you do. Then...well it'll be time to step into the ring. You can come at me like a lion, Nathaniel, but it won't be enough. See, I've fought bigger than you. I've fought stronger than you. I've fought more determined than you, and I've fought more brutally than you. In the ring, I will create traps, empty spaces, vacuums...when you think you're about to knock my head off, I won't be there, I'll be beside you, or behind you, or even right in front of you. I will face you the way I've always faced my opponents. With ice in my veins. A cold, calculating machine. You see, I'm not a student of the sport of wrestling...I'm the professor. I know a counter to every counter that you can dream of. I am patient, I am methodical, and I operate with precision. And when the time comes...and it will come, Nathaniel...I will revel in pushing bone against bone, manipulating joints past the natural range of motion and feeling all of that fire and determination and violent spirit being sapped from your body until you finally tap and say "I quit!" Now...care to tell me your strategy?

Nathaniel: Why would I tell YOU my strategy?

(Bishop grins and leans in to sign the contract, putting his pen on the signature line. He then looks up and pulls the pen away, standing from his chair.)

Bishop: Actually, you don't have to, because it won't be your game plan, will it? Mr. Ragsdale here, your manager, your mouthpiece, the man who got you the job, the guy who plucked you out of whatever meth lab in Ohio he found you in....

(Nathaniel is just about ready to tip the table over and charge Bishop but Ragsdale places his arm in front of Nathaniel as if to tell him to "calm down".)

Bishop: He's going to put all the strategy together for you, isn't he? You'll be waiting for him to slide you a chair or brass knuckles or a bazooka while Brittany distracts the official. Well, Nathaniel, don't worry about those two. As a matter of fact, if you don't keep your total focus on Devin Bishop, then you are going to be finished, quickly and decisively. I know better than to lose focus because when you let someone get into your head….

(Bishop now stands nose to nose with Nathaniel, lightly tapping his index finger against Nathaniel's temple)

Bishop: ... that's when the dominos begin to fall, and all your best laid plans...they just start to drop, one by one into a heap on the floor, and all that hard work turns into just another mess for your manager and your girlfriend to clean up.

(Bishop turns and walks back to the table, drumming his fingers as he takes his seat once more, pen in hand.)

Bishop: I'm going to sign this contract right here and now. No one is forcing my hand. I do so confidently, because I can see all that anger and impatience boiling up right now. Maybe you could borrow a couple of Aunt Sue's painkillers to take the edge off? Just don't neglect anything too important while you try to work all this out. You have to bring your game up to the level of The Apex, Devin Bishop.

(Bishop finally puts the pen to the contract and signs his name.)

Bishop: Oh! One last thing, Brittany. I have already purchased two front row seats for your children to come watch "mommy" in action.

(Nathaniel and Brittany look at each other as if to say "how does he know?". Even though their story went public awhile back, Bishop is the first person in UPW to address it. Nathaniel taps HIS index finger against Bishop's temple.)

Nathaniel: Listen ASSHOLE! If you think you’re gonna…..

(Ragsdale quickly jumps in between the two before things get out of control.)

Ragsdale: Hold on, hold on, let's not get carried away here.

Nathaniel (losing his patience): This is BULLSHIT and you know it! I wanna settle this TONIGHT!

Ragsdale: Nathaniel.....WAIT! There is a time and a place but it's not tonight.

(Nathaniel takes off his vest.)

Nathaniel: You tell him that if he does what he says he's gonna do with those two front row seats then he won't be getting outta bed the next morning at four AM to hit the gym. Nor will he have a "light lunch" with his "lovely" lady. Nor will he be going to a dojo to roll around on the mats with his pals. Wanna know why? Because he's gonna be lying in a hospital bed, sucking down his nutrients with a straw, regretting the fact that he fucked with the wrong guy.

Bishop: Touchy, touchy! Did I hit a nerve, Nathaniel? Well, welcome to the real world. I didn't make the rules, but I do know that the truth will set you free, but first it will piss you off.

Nathaniel: Listen Bishop, why don't we settle this right here and now?! You and me!

(Nathaniel shoves the table out of the way.)

Ragsdale: Calm down, Nathaniel. Please.

(Nathaniel sighs and rolls his eyes. Ragsdale directs his attention toward Bishop.)

Ragsdale: Devin Bishop.... there are few people in this company that I respect more than you. I must admit that I've been watching you closely since you've set foot into this company.

(Nathaniel is pacing back and forth in the background.)

Ragsdale: When you arrived in UPW, I knew you'd be successful. I knew you'd be World Champion and it was only a matter of time. There was no doubt in my mind that you'd make a great champion. You had this killer instinct that was missing from the likes of a Bryan Black or a Ron Masterson. You are the total package and bring it ALL to the table. To be quite honest, you're somebody that I wanted on my team. When I look at you, I sometimes think about what could have been. We could have made a lot of money together. But that's not the way things played out and that's okay because everything has worked out for both of us.....so far.

(Nathaniel doesn't seem to like the words that are coming out of Ragsdale's mouth as he can be seen saying a few choice words of his own. Brittany is whispering some words into Nathaniel's ear to calm him down.)

Ragsdale: When you started The Black Hand, I went out of my way to prevent all-out war between our two groups. I was a closet fan of yours and sat back as you developed your group. We developed ours. You had success. We've had success. There was little for either of us to gain by going to war with the other. It does seem as though we are on a collision course, however, and it appears that war is inevitable. (sighs)

Bishop: War? All we are talking about is one match, Ragsdale. If you want to turn this into a war, I can certainly accommodate you. I'm a big fan of Sun Tzu and Nicollo Machiavelli.

(Ragsdale smiles)

Ragsdale: You say you've watched every one of Nathaniel's matches and you know everything about him? I've done the same with you. I've studied your background. I've watched your matches from the past. I've watched all of your UPW matches and interviews. I've been scouting you for quite some time. And you know what? I've relayed everything I've learned about you to Nathaniel. Everything I know, he knows. He knows as much about you as you know about him. He knows your strengths AND your weaknesses.

(Nathaniel nods in the background as he continues to struggle to restrain himself.)

Ragsdale: You're a top notch competitor, Devin. You really are. But despite all of your strengths, you do have weaknesses. There's one flaw that you have that is quite notable. You're not the best judge of character. Adam Miller? Terrance Christopher? We got what we wanted out of Terrance before he moved on but he's still sucking your teat as is Adam Miller as is Kid Diaz as is Rain Blackheart. You see, you ARE The Black Hand. Remember when CJ Walker left your group?

Bishop: Of course. I orchestrated the whole thing, remember?

Ragsdale: It was no big loss. Not to take anything away from CJ, he's a talented guy, but The Black Hand didn't need him nor did he need The Black Hand. You lose a guy like Miller or Diaz, no big loss. The Black Hand loses YOU? It's OVER. That's how much influence you have over that group. People tell me all the time that The Black Hand is unstoppable. The Black Hand is invincible. There are no cracks in the armor of The Black Hand. The Black Hand is the most dominant force in the industry today. That's mainly because of you.

(Bishop smirks at the compliment, but then smiles.)

Bishop: I'm only one person...admittedly a powerful and persuasive person, but only one, just the same. Besides, I believe it was the Black Hand sans "The Apex" Devin Bishop that defeated both the Alliance and your boys at Sin City Strike. Did I miss something?

Ragsdale: Don't be so humble, Bishop. That's another one of your weaknesses.

Bishop: Humility? I'm the Apex! I'm the top of the mountain. I'm the crown jewel around here and you know it...just like I know it. My face is on all the posters, my voice speaks the loudest and with the most truth. I am the face of this company. I am the Champion of Champions and all that those in the locker room aspire to be. Humble?!? I am a walking ego trip, and I've earned every second of it.

Ragsdale: Let me finish, will ya?

Bishop: Oh! You weren't done? My mistake. Please, proceed.

Ragsdale: With all that being said, while he doesn't show it, Nathaniel is thrilled to be in the same ring with you in this competition for the UPW World Openweight Championship.

(Nathaniel makes a few not-so-friendly comments that aren't caught by the microphone. Bishop has a few not-so-friendly words of his own.)

Ragsdale: Hold on guys. Devin, let me ask you a question. At what point in your career do you feel that you "made it". Tell us about that night.

Bishop: I would have to say it was the night that I beat not one, not two, not even three...I beat FIVE of the top wrestlers that UPW has on the roster to win the World Championship.

Ragsdale: That was your crowning achievement, was it not?

Bishop: I suppose you would think that, but I knew it was just a matter of time until I became the top guy around here. All I needed was the opportunity.

Ragsdale: Let me tell you that Nathaniel is at that same crossroads that you were once at. He has a chance to make history. He has a chance to prove all of his naysayers wrong, who never even expected him to get this far this soon. He has a chance to become not just one of the elite but THE best that UPW has to offer. There is only one man standing in his way and that man is you. How do you feel about that?

Bishop: Let me see…

(Bishop strokes his beard as he makes an exaggerated show of "thinking over" Ragsdales's question.)

Bishop: Maybe this will answer your question…

(Bishop stands once again, dragging the World Championship belt across the mat, making a straight line before dropping it. He then steps over the belt, placing himself between Nathaniel and the belt.)

Bishop: Nathaniel, if you want MY championship, all you have to do is go through me. Hostile Fury, October 30th, Tokyo, Japan, Korakuen Hall. All you have to do is something that no one else has been able to do...climb the mountain and knock me off the top. The only thing standing between you and greatness is Devin Bishop and a hell of a lot of opportunity.

(Nathaniel locks eyes with Bishop and they stare each other down intensely as Brittany pats Nathaniel on the shoulder and Ragsdale stands on the opposite side of Nathaniel to keep things from sputtering out of control. Many use this as a photo op as pictures are taken.)

Nathaniel: I want you at your best. NO EXCUSES!

Bishop: Be careful what you wish for, Nathaniel. You just might get it.

(Bishop and Nathaniel continue their staredown and exchange some words that nobody can hear. Ragsdale says something to Nathaniel, seemingly to remind him to sign the contract. Nathaniel steps back and then moves toward the table with his eyes locked on Bishop. He signs his name and then slowly exits the ring with Ragsdale and Brittany as his eyes are still locked with Bishop's before the trio exit through the aisle.)

Sir Oliver: It's official! Devin Bishop will defend the UPW Openweight Championship against Nathaniel at Hostile Fury on October 30th in Tokyo Japan! What an intriguing matchup that will be.

V: I can't wait!

=================
King Diaz vs. Ariana Sears
=================

Lobo: Fans, it’s been one crazy night and it only promises to get more so.

Sir Oliver: I say, that would be a drastic understatement.

V: Like, King Diaz has made no bones about how he feels about women, and women wrestlers specifically.

Lobo: Ariana Sears plans to change his mind, as well as get into his head before the tag team match at Hostile Fury where the UPW belts will be on the line.

V: Enough of this blah blah. Let’s get to the introductions. I want to see some blood.

(Cut to the ring)

*Anderson: Ladies and gentlemen, this match is a singles competition and is your main event. It is set for one fall and has a 1 hour time limit. Introducing first…coming to the ring.. from Detroit, Michigan... she stands at five foot five inches tall and weighs in at one hundred and eighteen pounds... she is the Chaotic Princess.. ARIANA SEARS!!!

("Rock N Roll" by Avril Lavigne begins to play out of the speakers as the fans take to their feet seeing the glowing pink Christmas style lights draped over the curtain. Ariana steps out from the curtain with Jester LeBeau at her side. She is wearing a pair of black jeggings with a black. The top has Araina written right underneath the cleavage area, a short black leather jacket covers her arms a bit. Wearing a pair of black Nike shoes that sparkle like gems across the laces and logo. She twirls two times on the stage before moving down the walk way making sure to give a few fans high fives and a kiss blown as she winks. As she finishes she gets just outside the apron jumping up, turning her head back she throws her head around and holds one arm up her hand making the rock on sign. She drops down doing the splits ducking her head under the bottom rope. Rolling through to bring herself to her feet as she gets up nodding her head to the music, smiling taken in the adoration of the fans. After her music ends she drops down to the corner leaning against the bottom turnbuckle until the match is about to start. LeBeau stands outside of her corner and watches.)

Lobo: Sears looks relaxed. No sense of trepidation here at all.

Sir Oliver: She’s as cool as a cucumber and ready for action.

V: Like, I hope she displays more fire in the match.

*Anderson: And her opponent…hailing from Belfast, Northern Ireland... he weighs in at two hundred and seventy-five pounds while standing at six feet two inches tall... he is The Gun Show... welcome to the ring, KID DIAZ!!!

(The lights dim on the arena. “Keep Their Heads Ringing” by Doctor Dre fires up. Kid Diaz comes from behind the curtain waving a Ulster Flag! At his side is Adam Miller. He makes his way down the ramp to the cheers of the fans. He slaps hands with the fans and then rolls into the ring. Miller stands on the floor behind his corner.)

Lobo: Diaz smirks at Sears in her corner. Sears totally ignores him and hauls herself to her feet once referee Edwards calls both wrestlers to the center of the ring for their instructions. Diaz continues smirking and offers Sears his hand when Edwards is done. Sears stares at it for a moment while Diaz motions for her to shake. Sears starts for it and Diaz pulls it back quickly.

Diaz: Too slow!

Lobo: Sears responds by slapping Diaz hard across the face.

Sears: Fast enough for you?

Lobo: Edwards sends both wrestlers back to their corners and calls for the bell.

(BELL RINGS)

(Sears came out of her corner while Diaz just strolled his way out. They lock up and Diaz takes Sears over with a side headlock. Diaz turns so that Edwards can’t see him and punches Sears in the face.

Sears backs away and Edwards confronts Diaz. Diaz makes the motion that he struck her with an open palm.)

Lobo: Diaz is trying to convince Edwards that he didn’t just punch Sears in the face.

V: Like, Edwards would have to prove it. Innocent until proven guilty, Lobo.

(They lock back up once again and once again. Diaz put Sears in a side headlock. Sears with the push off sends Diaz into the ropes. Sears flops to the floor as Diaz comes off the ropes. Diaz hops over her and hits the other ropes. Sears springs back to her feet and as Diaz comes in range, Sears takes him over with a hip toss. Sears goes behind Diaz and puts on a rear chin lock.)

Lobo: Sears wasn’t about to get punched in the face a second time.

Sir Oliver: Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me.

V: Fool me over and over and call me Baptist Lobo.

(Sears has Diaz head back and chops him in the throat as she releases him. Diaz rolls out of the ring and starts to talk with Miller. Sears goes to a corner and patiently waits for Diaz to get back in. Diaz climbs back into the ring and Sears comes out of the corner to meet him. Diaz grabs Sears by the arm and sends her to the mat with a short clothesline. Diaz with a leg drop but Sears rolls out of the way and Diaz lands hard on the mat.)

Lobo: Diaz is going to have to see a chiropractor when this match is over.

Sir Oliver: My money is on a proctologist. That looks like it hurt the tailbone.

V: Diaz is tough. Like, he won’t need to see a doctor. Arianna Sears will, though, when Diaz is through with her.

(Both wrestlers are back on their feet. Sears surprises Diaz with a flying somersault neckbreaker. Sears goes for the cover.)

Edwards: 1…toss off.

Lobo: I think that move surprised Diaz.

Sir Oliver: I certainly wasn’t expecting it.

V: Like, nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!

Lobo: What?

Sir Oliver: An obvious Monty Python reference.

V: Is that where it was from? I just heard one of my friends say it and I thought it sounded cool.

(King Diaz is up first and hauls Sears to her feet. King Diaz sends Sears into the ropes. Sears ducks the clothesline as she comes off the ropes and hits the far ropes. Sears comes flying off the ropes with a flying cross body block. Diaz catches her mid-air and turns it into a spinning power slam. Diaz hooks the leg as he goes for the pin.)

Edwards: 1…shoulder up.

(Diaz punches Sears and goes for the cover once again.)

Edwards: 1…handful of rope.

Lobo: Great ring presence there from Ariana Sears as she knew she was close enough to the ropes to grab them.

V: Next time King Diaz will make sure the ropes are nowhere near.

(Both wrestlers are back on their feet once again. King Diaz smirks at Sears once again and draws a thumb across his throat then points at her. Sears simply smiles back but makes no other movement. Diaz charges at Sears who sidesteps him and delivers a chop to the back of his neck as he passes by. Diaz stumbles and Sears puts a boot on his rear end, then gives him a shove, sending him out of the ring to crash to the floor.

Sears goes to her corner once again and stands impassively as Diaz gets back up. Diaz glares at Sears who smiles sweetly at him. Diaz charges back into the ring and rushes at Sears. Sears rolls out of the way as Diaz crashes into the corner, chest first.

Diaz staggers back and Sears nails him with a spinning heel kick to the back of the head. Diaz goes face first to the canvas. Sears rolls him over and goes for the pin.)

Edwards: 1…2…toss off.

Lobo: Sears is really giving Diaz some grief. Diaz has to be careful not to allow his temper to get the better of him.

V: He’s going to channel it and destroy Sears. Just watch.

(Diaz is back on his feet and staring daggers at Sears. Sears looks impassively back at him and motions for him to come at her. Kid Diaz doesn’t rise to the bait, but simply moves toward her. Sears makes a grab for Diaz but Diaz quickly goes behind her, hoists her up and drops her with an Atomic Drop. Sears dances away and Diaz follows her, grabbing her head and sending her to the mat with a bulldog.

Sears goes limp as she hits the mat. Diaz drags her into the center of the ring and goes for the cover.)

Edwards: 1…2…shoulder up.

(Edwards calls for the break and Diaz gives Sears a kick to the ribs after he gets to his feet. Diaz hauls Sears to her feet and whips her hard into the ropes. As she comes off Diaz connects with a standing dropkick. Sears goes back down to the mat and Diaz goes for the cover once again.)

Edwards: 1…2…Thr…shoulder up.

(Diaz gets to his feet and yells at Edwards that the count was slow! He says that should have been a solid 3 count but Edwards tells him to get back to the match.

While Diaz is yelling at Edwards, Sears sneaks up on him and rolls him up in a schoolboy.)

Edwards: 1…2…3!

(BELL RINGS)

*Anderson: Ladies and gentlemen, in the time of 13:11, The Chaotic Princess ARIANNA SEARS!

Lobo: Jester comes into the ring to congratulate his partner. He’s on his way over and…ADAM MILLER JUST SPEARED HIM FROM THE SIDE!

Sir Oliver: It appears that Rated M doesn’t take losing well.

V: Show me a good loser and I’ll, like, show you a loser!

Lobo: Diaz grabs Arianna Sears and sends her out of the ring, then joins Adam Miller as they work over Jester. Miller has the leg that Jester had worked over when THC tried to end his career! Miller is picking up where THC left off and is trying his best to pull Jester’s leg out of it’s socket.

Sir Oliver: I say, that’s not quite cricket.

V: Well, Diaz isn’t going to miss out on the fun either. While Miller is working on the leg, Diaz is kicking Jester in the ribs.

Lobo: Diaz is trying to turn Jester’s ribs into powder. Arianna Sears is trying to get back into the ring to help her partner but Diaz runs over and punches her, sending her back to the floor. Miller has left the leg at an awkward angle and grabs Jester’s arm.

Sir Oliver: Oh, jolly bad show. Jester had that arm slammed into a folding chair and almost lost it.

V: Maybe Jester can join Ruby in the prosthetics brigade.

Lobo: Here comes CJ Walker’s security with the EMTs. Security chases Rated M out of the ring and the Las Vegas EMTs start to work on Jester. They’re trying to check for any dislocations and have put an oxygen mask on him as they load him up on the stretcher.

Sir Oliver: Well, this does put quite a damper on LeBeau and Sears outlook for the belts at Hostile Fury.

Lobo: That’s all the time we have tonight. Thanks for joining us and see you again in two weeks for another edition of Friday Night Free-For-All!