An Apology, & A Future Plan. That May or May not Work
Oct 9, 2021 22:47:33 GMT -5
Mongo the Destroyer likes this
Post by The Dunne Deal on Oct 9, 2021 22:47:33 GMT -5
Hey, I'm trying to get my life back on track, and realized that over the last couple of months, I've let my emotions get the better of me. I'm not thinking thoroughly, and it's clear to myself, and to others I'm very clearly going through the motions. I don't like no-showing events, but it's also clear I have no clear goal in mind when it comes to my characters. I so focused on the end goal, I'm not thinking about the steps to get to that end goal. An it's quite evident.
I remember I while back on the discord I said I was easy to win the X*Crown. And while I may offend people with this statement. I still believe it that to be true. It's a title, a championship. Those are a dime a dozen. But keeping it, that's where the real challenge comes in. Dylan may currently be the greatest X*Crown champion, for now. I'm not bragging, just stating facts. Records are made to be broken.
I've been emotional, and lashing out. I'm frustrated, and I feel lost. I'm to prideful to ask for help. And the help I do ask for, it often feels like people are just telling me what they think I want to hear, or at least in my own mind, that's how it comes off.
So, I'm sorry. I can't say it anymore clear than that. I'm sorry.
I let a few good moments get to my head, and I develop an attitude and an ego. It's a horrible character flaw. But, it's part of makes me, me. I have to learn to get out of the mind-set of I have a mic and live audience. I have to teach myself, that what might work as trash-talk in the ring, doesn't always translate well to an e-fed community, and it's a hard lesson to learn. I have to in essence re-wire my entire brain in order to get my mind, characters and overall writing to a point, where I too can one day be listed under X*Crown holders.
But, if I'm being completely honest, if I where to just straight Trash talk I could probably make most of everyone character's cry, if this was a real life situation. Sorry getting off track. Anyways where was I, oh yeah.
I'm still going be here, but not as active. I'm going to finish what I've started for this month, and then after that. I'm not really sure. I just need to figure out which of my characters I want to be my main, focus on them, build the characters. What makes them unique from one and another. Build up my wins, gain some smaller titles, like NLW's Southern State's Champions, and then when the time is right. I'm putting the X*Crown holder's head on a pike. I am refusing to reach for the X*Crown whenever it's dangled in front of me, like a steak.
If I'm going to become X*Crown Champion one day, it is because I want the holder to seek me out, not the other way around.
I remember I while back on the discord I said I was easy to win the X*Crown. And while I may offend people with this statement. I still believe it that to be true. It's a title, a championship. Those are a dime a dozen. But keeping it, that's where the real challenge comes in. Dylan may currently be the greatest X*Crown champion, for now. I'm not bragging, just stating facts. Records are made to be broken.
I've been emotional, and lashing out. I'm frustrated, and I feel lost. I'm to prideful to ask for help. And the help I do ask for, it often feels like people are just telling me what they think I want to hear, or at least in my own mind, that's how it comes off.
So, I'm sorry. I can't say it anymore clear than that. I'm sorry.
I let a few good moments get to my head, and I develop an attitude and an ego. It's a horrible character flaw. But, it's part of makes me, me. I have to learn to get out of the mind-set of I have a mic and live audience. I have to teach myself, that what might work as trash-talk in the ring, doesn't always translate well to an e-fed community, and it's a hard lesson to learn. I have to in essence re-wire my entire brain in order to get my mind, characters and overall writing to a point, where I too can one day be listed under X*Crown holders.
But, if I'm being completely honest, if I where to just straight Trash talk I could probably make most of everyone character's cry, if this was a real life situation. Sorry getting off track. Anyways where was I, oh yeah.
I'm still going be here, but not as active. I'm going to finish what I've started for this month, and then after that. I'm not really sure. I just need to figure out which of my characters I want to be my main, focus on them, build the characters. What makes them unique from one and another. Build up my wins, gain some smaller titles, like NLW's Southern State's Champions, and then when the time is right. I'm putting the X*Crown holder's head on a pike. I am refusing to reach for the X*Crown whenever it's dangled in front of me, like a steak.
If I'm going to become X*Crown Champion one day, it is because I want the holder to seek me out, not the other way around.