Post by rich121 on Feb 14, 2022 16:02:17 GMT -5
Open on an empty bar, no bartender, no patrons just Jester LeBeau apparently just casually throwing darts and drinking bourbon from the bottle. The camera, which is attached to the target, is focused on Jester as he throws a dart. We can hear it hit and the camera shakes a bit as it sticks…
Jester: “You would think with my experience with needles that would be more accurate with my throws. (another dart flies and hits the target)
“Maybe I’m just a bit off after that fucking four way. I didn’t realize a bit of mistaken identity has Von Krossbuns in such a flutter to attempt to repay me in kind. (Jester makes a baseball windup and pitches a dart. It hits and the camera shutters a bit again)
“I mean don’t get me wrong, that chop was fucking impressive but now I know your best weapon, your best offensive move and I’m still here and now I’m taking it personal. (reaches for another dart but there are none, he throws the empty bottle and when it hits the camera is shaking all about)
“No no no, that will never do. (Jester approaches the camera and starts wrapping electrical tape around and around) There we go, much better. (pulls the darts out of the target, walks over to the bar and pulls out another bottle and a bag that clanks when he picks it up and goes back to his table)
“You see Izzie, can I call you Izzie or am I talking to Esmie? Ah whogivesafuck? Anyway, you see ‘m not even a little mad about taking me out of the match, well maybe a little mad but that’s because I still had more damage to do but I didn’t need to win that world title shot because I’ve got one just waiting for me to use. (throws a dart and when it hits there is minimal movement) Yeah, that’s much better. Where was I? Oh I guess I have to deal with you Miss Von Kraut to get you out of my hair so’s I can focus on some much more entertaining options. (lets fly another dart)
"Maybe I should plan on cashing in my title shot at Blow Your Mind, or maybe I should just show up at ringside, blaze a blunt and enjoy the show. Maybe I should invite the Robersons to join in also. (looks down at the remaining darts) Hmm, this is getting boring. (opens the bag he brought from the bar and pulls out several throwing axes) Ah yeah bay-bay, now this is gonna be a party! (there is a muffled scream seemingly behind the camera)
“Oh come on now, you wanted to have this exclusive interview right? You wanted to be the hero of UNLV broadcast department, right? You’re getting everything you wanted but there is always a price. Just like Izzie is going to be beaten and broken because to be quite honest she’s asking for it. (picks up an ax and hurls it at his target, muffled crying begins) HEY! There is no crying in ax throwing!
“Now Nate thinks he come up with some kind of punishing situation when he is told by his puppeteers what he will be booking for his create a card show. Hell, that doesn’t worry me at all, fuck I can’t even get a little aroused because the ‘punishment’ is going to be decided by a giant tool, his girlfriend that I may have to bend over my knee and spank, and his manager who thinks boloney and cheese on wheat is healthy eating. (throws the next ax) Oh well, do you really need BOTH knees?
“Nate, let me just come out and say it… book your title match in a steel cage, with a top if possible. If CJ wins you’ll also be up against his security train that he pulls or if Diaz retains you’ll have to be on the lookout for the rest of the Black Hand and good ol’ Terrance. You can thank me when you become the UPW World Openweight Champion. See, I’m full of good ideas. (hurls a third ax)
"You know I might feel bad for you but I’ve seen your browser history and your downloads. Boy oh boy do you like little boys. And that’s why I agreed to let you film this little meeting, because you have been very bad just like Izzie and now you get to be hurt. But before we wrap this up, is there anything you’d like to add? No? Alrighty then (throws the final ax and there is a sickening thud) AND WE HAVE A BULLSEYE!!!”
Jester: “You would think with my experience with needles that would be more accurate with my throws. (another dart flies and hits the target)
“Maybe I’m just a bit off after that fucking four way. I didn’t realize a bit of mistaken identity has Von Krossbuns in such a flutter to attempt to repay me in kind. (Jester makes a baseball windup and pitches a dart. It hits and the camera shutters a bit again)
“I mean don’t get me wrong, that chop was fucking impressive but now I know your best weapon, your best offensive move and I’m still here and now I’m taking it personal. (reaches for another dart but there are none, he throws the empty bottle and when it hits the camera is shaking all about)
“No no no, that will never do. (Jester approaches the camera and starts wrapping electrical tape around and around) There we go, much better. (pulls the darts out of the target, walks over to the bar and pulls out another bottle and a bag that clanks when he picks it up and goes back to his table)
“You see Izzie, can I call you Izzie or am I talking to Esmie? Ah whogivesafuck? Anyway, you see ‘m not even a little mad about taking me out of the match, well maybe a little mad but that’s because I still had more damage to do but I didn’t need to win that world title shot because I’ve got one just waiting for me to use. (throws a dart and when it hits there is minimal movement) Yeah, that’s much better. Where was I? Oh I guess I have to deal with you Miss Von Kraut to get you out of my hair so’s I can focus on some much more entertaining options. (lets fly another dart)
"Maybe I should plan on cashing in my title shot at Blow Your Mind, or maybe I should just show up at ringside, blaze a blunt and enjoy the show. Maybe I should invite the Robersons to join in also. (looks down at the remaining darts) Hmm, this is getting boring. (opens the bag he brought from the bar and pulls out several throwing axes) Ah yeah bay-bay, now this is gonna be a party! (there is a muffled scream seemingly behind the camera)
“Oh come on now, you wanted to have this exclusive interview right? You wanted to be the hero of UNLV broadcast department, right? You’re getting everything you wanted but there is always a price. Just like Izzie is going to be beaten and broken because to be quite honest she’s asking for it. (picks up an ax and hurls it at his target, muffled crying begins) HEY! There is no crying in ax throwing!
“Now Nate thinks he come up with some kind of punishing situation when he is told by his puppeteers what he will be booking for his create a card show. Hell, that doesn’t worry me at all, fuck I can’t even get a little aroused because the ‘punishment’ is going to be decided by a giant tool, his girlfriend that I may have to bend over my knee and spank, and his manager who thinks boloney and cheese on wheat is healthy eating. (throws the next ax) Oh well, do you really need BOTH knees?
“Nate, let me just come out and say it… book your title match in a steel cage, with a top if possible. If CJ wins you’ll also be up against his security train that he pulls or if Diaz retains you’ll have to be on the lookout for the rest of the Black Hand and good ol’ Terrance. You can thank me when you become the UPW World Openweight Champion. See, I’m full of good ideas. (hurls a third ax)
"You know I might feel bad for you but I’ve seen your browser history and your downloads. Boy oh boy do you like little boys. And that’s why I agreed to let you film this little meeting, because you have been very bad just like Izzie and now you get to be hurt. But before we wrap this up, is there anything you’d like to add? No? Alrighty then (throws the final ax and there is a sickening thud) AND WE HAVE A BULLSEYE!!!”