Post by davidberg47 on Feb 28, 2022 15:17:49 GMT -5
David Berg sits in the locker room. He is alone or is he. Because he is holding the Sin City Championship. Yes, he is the new champion. Berg looks at the championship belt and puts it down. Cleanly showered, he exits the building. Some fans are outside seeking and autograph, which Berg graciously signs each and everyone. It is a cool Vegas night as Berg walks toward the hotel where he is living. His phone rings and Berg almost drops it.
Berg: You have got to be kidding me.
Management: Hello Mr. Berg did you miss me?
(The female voice of Management sends anger down the spine of Berg)
Management: I see you have finally turned it around and made your country proud.
Berg: Thank you. I think?
Management: Mr. Berg we had to take the actions we took because you were well frankly an embarrassment. But you have done a complete 180. You are a champion. A winner. You are a proud member of Israel.
Berg: How convenient.
Management: Do not be snide Mr. Berg, you are still a member of the Israeli military and I am your superior.
Berg: Of course.
Management: But this is a time to celebrate. We have deposited a substantial amount to your account so have fun. Go out with your friends.
Berg: Thank you
Management: Until next time, Mr. Berg.
(Berg continues toward his hotel. Friends? He doesn’t have friends. Aside from Emma Stone. Who needs friends anyway. They just disappoint you and die. Berg walks into the hotel and there is a note for him at the front desk to see Mr. Edelman right away in Conference Room A1. Now what, Berg thinks to himself. He walks in and its pitch black but then the lights go on and everyone yells surprise and congratulations as food and drinks are being served. Emma is there, Gary the executive suite card dealer, Bobby and Misty the bartenders, Jonah, Timmy and Diego, the bellboys. And others. Mr. Edelman the owner of the casino walks over and pats David on the back with a congratulatory wish. As the party winds down its just Berg and Emma sitting on the stage area)
Emma: Congrats. I mean you are quite the killer.
Berg: Literally
Emma: Ha ha. Well not like that anymore. Why don’t you get on the mic here on the stage and say a few things. I’ll video it and post it on social media?
Berg: Such as?
Emma: Such as your message to UPW and the wrestling world. You are the Sin City Champion.
Berg: I don’t know. I do not want to be too braggadocious.
Emma: What?
Berg: I said
Emma: I head what you said. You certainly have the looks, the moves in the ring, the size you’re young. You did get over but you need to upgrade that charisma to really be the man.
Berg: What do you mean upgrade that charisma?
Emma: Well…that brooding handsome tough guy act is cool and all but you need to come out of your shell a little. Be the David Berg I got to know and like.
Berg: Like?
Emma: Ahem…well I do like you, David. I am also like 10 years older than you!
Berg: Yeah, you’re definitely ready for that walker sooner than later.
(Stone punches David in the arm)
Emma: Funny. Now get on the mic and do that David Berg humor, shit talk that you do so well.
Berg: Now?
Emma: Yes, now!
(Berg walks over to the mic)
Emma: Take your shirt off.
(Berg takes off his shirt)
Berg: Is this to make me look more like a wrestler?
Emma: No. I just like looking at you without your shirt on.
Berg: I see
Emma: Ha! You’re blushing. Now start talking. Recording in one…two…three…GO!
Berg: Hello UPW and thank you to all the fans who….
Emma: STOP….NOPE!!! AGAIN!!
Berg: What?
Emma: Golly gee, thank you fans. Are you the King of the Streets from Jerusalem, Israel or are you Bucky from Trailer Park, Alabama. Let’s go. Again!
(Berg refocuses)
Berg: UPW, your new Sin City Champion is here. It was a struggle, but I competed, I gave it my all, I…
Emma: STOP….nope.
(Berg looks at the ceiling annoyed)
Berg: Now what?
Emma: It is a snooze fest. You can be the brooding killer in the ring. But let me see the charismatic and funny David Berg that I know out of the ring. Come on Berg. Do better.
(Berg glares at the camera)
Berg: This is ridiculous
Emma: BETTER!!
Berg: I am really not sure
Emma: Do it and you get a reward.
Berg: Really? And what is that?
Emma: Maybe I’ll take my shirt off?
(Berg is speechless)
Emma: One….Two….Threee….RECORDING!
Berg: Hello, can you hear me UPW? Can you hear me XHF? This is your NEW SIN CITY CHAMPION. I tried to tell you. I tried to tell you, Summer. You are a green haired, tree hugging, Green New Deal supporting typical American Leftist. You have grown WEAK. You call yourself the War Dancer. Well I am David Berg, the King of the Streets, the Chosen one of the Chosen people. But in the Israeli Military, I was called the Body Snatcher. Why? When I fought I would take apart all the parts of the body. I would take the legs, the lungs, the kidneys, until the opponent BEGGED for mercy.
The fans could not hear it but as I was taking you apart, piece by piece by piece, I heard you whimpering. I heard you whining and crying. Please let it end. Please. Your legs did not work, your lungs could not catch their breath. Your face was numb. When I stomped your stupid Leftist face into the mat it was a mercy killing. Then I tossed you out of the ring like the hot garbage that you are Summer.
You wonder, David Berg, why are you so angry? Why? This is what America has become. You are represented by the likes of Summer Pyke. A tree hugging, my pronouns are she/he/they/them, vegan leftist pile of crap. You Americans insist on being the world police and then you elect a Depends wearing vegetable to be your President. What are the repercussions? A tyrant is invading Ukraine and all you can do is sanction while buying their oil?!?!? When you have access to your own. This is who Summer Pyke is. The new age, gender neutral, vegan eating, latte drinking, waste of Damn space. I did UPW a favor by taking this belt off your non deserving waist.
I am not finished. I see CJ Walker is the new Champion as he defeated that lunk head Kid Diaz. What do Pixi and CJ have in common? I beat them both. That is what. Yeah, your Sin City Champion defeated your Open Weight Champion. That’s right, CJ. Enjoy your reign but know that you’re the #2 champion in the company. The fanbase knows that The King of the Streets, the Body Snatcher, the Chosen of the Chosen people is as you Americans say your daddy. Enjoy your title. Talk your smack. Do what it is you do, but know this I can take your title whenever I want. The only reason. And I mean the ONLY reason you are champion is because I ALLOW IT!
Lastly, I see what Madame Vu has done. I do. On March 11th, I, Dave Berg, the Body Snatcher will team up with Burn to take on the tag team champions. They know me and I know them. Maddox and Candy, we fought together so you have my respect but I cannot say the same for my partner. You see she is an elderly lady. Yeah and you think, what the hell could she do? Well in the Israeli Defense Force, we have women who are 70 who would kick your ass! We are surrounded by terrorist enemies and age and gender are irrelevant. Everyone fights. That means Burn will fight and I am pretty sure she is not a fan of tree huggers like you Candy and little fancy boys like you, Maddox. This is a non-title match so that means I get to display all sorts off skills on your liberal, tea sipping asses. And after I am done beating the hell out of you, I will tag in Bernie and she will make you wish I never tagged out!
I leave UPW and XHF with this. The old shy David Berg dies as of now. I am here representing the country that still elects leaders with balls to fight. I am their destruction machine and I will take down anyone and everyone that stands in my way. I look at the Haus of Savaje and I do not see respected champions. Don’t get me wrong. America is the greatest nation on Earth. If you live in a Red State. Otherwise you are stuck with hypocritical assholes who tell you to wear masks while they don’t as we saw during the Super Bowl and they don't even know which damn bathroom to use. That is who Candy and Maddox are. That is not remotely who David Berg is. But after our match you will want to wear masks after I and Burn get through with you. My pronouns are simple. I just stomped your ass!
(Berg drops the mic)
Emma: YESSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Berg: That felt great
Emma: That is who you are.
Berg: It certainly is
(Berg grabs his duffel bag and gives Emma a fist pump as he walks out of the conference room)
Emma: Aren’t you forgetting something?
(Berg turns around as Emma Stone begins taking off her shirt as the screen fades to black)