Post by MYŌJIN on Mar 4, 2022 23:59:59 GMT -5
“I am scared of deep water.”
The camera view fades into the picturesque scenery of a white sand beach. Rocks and small structures made by nature's minerals scattered around while the rhythmic, loud but calming sound of waves washing up against land repeated again and again. It was afternoon, the sky's blue starting to be overrun by a pink-purple hue. Clouds were outlined by a golden aura that radiated from the orange sun in the distance, which sunk further under the horizon as time had passed. It was a beautiful sight, a tranquil one, with nothing but the sound of the saltwater rushing and the occasional birds that came around- background sounds of the world that were like music to one's ears... Places like such were perfect for meditation in solitude and self-reflection; something that the Shining Star, MYOJIN, had desperately found themself needing for the longest time.
“Just when you think that you have everything figured out, there's something that comes out of the blue and catches you by surprise. I think wrestlers out of all people know this the most. Last year, specifically last March- I grew so comfortable as the XHF Junior Heavyweight Champion that I never saw the bullet that was Bloodied Fox coming to end it.” MYOJIN spoke, dark brown eyes staring off into the distance. Their look had changed, their once long and golden hairstyle was replaced with spiky, platinum locks with shaved sides. “Last August, right after earning the biggest win of my entire career at Night of Champions… A week or two later, I ended up unconscious in a pool of my own blood with the X*Crown ripped from me… Life is unpredictable, chaotic, challenging, a lot of times pretty unfair and it can be so, so, so overwhelming that sometimes you just need…”
Motioning around themself, “Peace and quiet… This is La Jolla Cove- a place in my hometown of San Diego, a place that was a vital part of my childhood when I needed to escape from everything and has been that since. It's my safe haven for when I've needed to think… And I can't think of a time where I've needed this place more than now.”
“Now, where was I, darlings?” MYOJIN lightly laughed, placing a hand to their chin. “That's right- I'm afraid of swimming in the ocean. That's kind of crazy to hear from someone like me, isn't it? It makes me sound childish, a lot softer than anyone thought, believe me- I know… It's not that I don't know how to swim. My family used to come to this beach often when I was really young, I used to venture out, but there was one time when the waves were so big, so strong… and they overtook me. I almost drowned, or at least… I thought I was. Ever since then whenever I would get in so deep that I couldn't feel sand underneath me I'd panic, it's hard for me to even hold my head underwater.”
“Now, all you lovelies are probably wondering… What does this have to do with anything at all? Good question. I guess the point that I'm trying to get to is… being able to finally face a fear.”
Running a hand through strands of their hair, the Shining Star took a deep breath. Closing their eyes as they tilted their head. “It's no secret that these last few months haven't exactly been the most stellar of my career. Ever since I lost the X*Crown Championship, I have been… struggling. I haven't been competing on the same level that I once was, not as motivated… Not as passionate, not even as skilled. I thought that would change once I earned a chance to be in the first Wildfire Championship match, but… That was taken from me. I thought that I would change once Caffrey and I-,” The nonchalant expression on MYOJIN's face quickly darkened. "- won the Tag Team Championships, but we didn't, and then he started blaming me for it… And you know what? At some point, I think I started believing him. I started to think that maybe he was right, that I dropped the ball like I've continously done so many times before. I was growing more and more bitter, hateful, all the things that he said I would start becoming…”[/color]
MYOJIN shook their head, standing up and dusting the sand off their pants. Beginning to walk, following the horizontal shoreline while still looking out toward the horizon. “I remember when this match was first announced.. And I looked at the three other relevant people- Constantine- a two-time X*Crown Champion now. Natalie Burrows, the longest-reigning FIRESIDE World Champion, Vodka Fizz- SPARK Champion. The first thing I initially thought was ‘Do I really belong against these names anymore?’”
They then stopped in their tracks, shaking their head. “And that's when I froze and ask myself… What the hell is wrong with me?”
“This match, this Inferno main event where so much more than championships; pride, is on the line… I started to wonder where had mine went? The same pride that allowed me to beat Misha Constantine at Battle of the Best? The same pride that made me a contender for one of the best wrestlers in the world in 2021? Recently, I have been so afraid of failure. Unable to move on from the past and keep moving forward, dusting myself off and keep marching on as I've always done before… I couldn't let go. I couldn't let go of the past. Of what Valentine did to me, of not winning the Tag Team Championships. You know what, I'll even agree with what so many thought about me; I was being a whiny, little bitch.”
“But that's through. From now on, I am finished being that way. I am finished being controlled by my own fault.”
MYOJIN turned to then face the water, slowly and steadily walking toward it. “Misha Constantine may be a former X-Crown Champion, but he hasn't a learned a thing since the time we last faced. Still running off of nothing but spite… and considering that I've been doing the same thing since the beginning of this year? I understand better now than never how easy it is to get sucked into that hatred and not be able to find your way out, not be able to think clearly. Misha, you haven't been able to get anywhere ahead because you're so focused on trying to belittle everyone else that you seem to never realize your own faults. And now, you're more focused on the fact that you were right- and yes I will admit, you were right- about Caffrey being an egotistical manchild than actually winning the match. You're so focused on Bloodied Fox and his husband that you have tunnel vision. Your life is nothing but miserable, and misery loves company- but I'll remind you once again: You are no God.”
“But at least Misha has earned his way into this match by the work ethic he showed last year, along with his accolades. Caffrey? Caffrey has done nothing to deserve his place here. Remember when you were worried about being a corrupt leader? Remember when FIRESIDE was supposed to be the place to give equal opportunity to wrestlers, not to be a vanity project for some basic loser. I used to believe in you and your vision for wrestling. I used to trust you, look up to you as a mentor, even- But I should have known better. Everyone- and I mean, EVERYONE continuously pointed out the same thing about you: You never truly changed from the self-absorbed, delusional dickhead from AXW- Except this time, you're so desperate to be liked and adored. You can't stand when people are more beloved than you by your own hometown crowd. You're pathetic, wanting to achieve the same relevancy you haven't had since the Purple Emperors. Thank you for giving me the motivation I needed to win; the desire to beat your ass.”
“Natalie and Vodka, the two champions in this match… There's nothing that I really have against either of you. Both of you are more than deserving to be called the Best Wrestler of 2021… But for you two, this is just something to brag about. This is just a little nickname you can show off proudly… For me?”
“I need this. I need this match to finally find my way again. I need to be what MYOJIN was once before again- No, I need to become even better than that. Instead of fighting against the waves and drowning, not being able to get past my lowest moments…” MYOJIN stopped as the shoreline was up to their knees now, a rather big wave slowly rippling its way toward them. The Shining Star was somewhat nervous, pausing even, and almost instinctually taking a step back- not wanting to relive that experience so long ago. They took a deep breath.
“...I need to let it wash over me and finally take a step forward. I am finally letting go.” MYOJIN gently braced themself, lowering their head as the wave crashed over them- They briefly went underwater, seemingly panicking for a few moments before calming down and staying still for a few moments- then rising their head above it once more. A star reborn.
The camera view fades into the picturesque scenery of a white sand beach. Rocks and small structures made by nature's minerals scattered around while the rhythmic, loud but calming sound of waves washing up against land repeated again and again. It was afternoon, the sky's blue starting to be overrun by a pink-purple hue. Clouds were outlined by a golden aura that radiated from the orange sun in the distance, which sunk further under the horizon as time had passed. It was a beautiful sight, a tranquil one, with nothing but the sound of the saltwater rushing and the occasional birds that came around- background sounds of the world that were like music to one's ears... Places like such were perfect for meditation in solitude and self-reflection; something that the Shining Star, MYOJIN, had desperately found themself needing for the longest time.
“Just when you think that you have everything figured out, there's something that comes out of the blue and catches you by surprise. I think wrestlers out of all people know this the most. Last year, specifically last March- I grew so comfortable as the XHF Junior Heavyweight Champion that I never saw the bullet that was Bloodied Fox coming to end it.” MYOJIN spoke, dark brown eyes staring off into the distance. Their look had changed, their once long and golden hairstyle was replaced with spiky, platinum locks with shaved sides. “Last August, right after earning the biggest win of my entire career at Night of Champions… A week or two later, I ended up unconscious in a pool of my own blood with the X*Crown ripped from me… Life is unpredictable, chaotic, challenging, a lot of times pretty unfair and it can be so, so, so overwhelming that sometimes you just need…”
Motioning around themself, “Peace and quiet… This is La Jolla Cove- a place in my hometown of San Diego, a place that was a vital part of my childhood when I needed to escape from everything and has been that since. It's my safe haven for when I've needed to think… And I can't think of a time where I've needed this place more than now.”
“Now, where was I, darlings?” MYOJIN lightly laughed, placing a hand to their chin. “That's right- I'm afraid of swimming in the ocean. That's kind of crazy to hear from someone like me, isn't it? It makes me sound childish, a lot softer than anyone thought, believe me- I know… It's not that I don't know how to swim. My family used to come to this beach often when I was really young, I used to venture out, but there was one time when the waves were so big, so strong… and they overtook me. I almost drowned, or at least… I thought I was. Ever since then whenever I would get in so deep that I couldn't feel sand underneath me I'd panic, it's hard for me to even hold my head underwater.”
“Now, all you lovelies are probably wondering… What does this have to do with anything at all? Good question. I guess the point that I'm trying to get to is… being able to finally face a fear.”
Running a hand through strands of their hair, the Shining Star took a deep breath. Closing their eyes as they tilted their head. “It's no secret that these last few months haven't exactly been the most stellar of my career. Ever since I lost the X*Crown Championship, I have been… struggling. I haven't been competing on the same level that I once was, not as motivated… Not as passionate, not even as skilled. I thought that would change once I earned a chance to be in the first Wildfire Championship match, but… That was taken from me. I thought that I would change once Caffrey and I-,” The nonchalant expression on MYOJIN's face quickly darkened. "- won the Tag Team Championships, but we didn't, and then he started blaming me for it… And you know what? At some point, I think I started believing him. I started to think that maybe he was right, that I dropped the ball like I've continously done so many times before. I was growing more and more bitter, hateful, all the things that he said I would start becoming…”[/color]
MYOJIN shook their head, standing up and dusting the sand off their pants. Beginning to walk, following the horizontal shoreline while still looking out toward the horizon. “I remember when this match was first announced.. And I looked at the three other relevant people- Constantine- a two-time X*Crown Champion now. Natalie Burrows, the longest-reigning FIRESIDE World Champion, Vodka Fizz- SPARK Champion. The first thing I initially thought was ‘Do I really belong against these names anymore?’”
They then stopped in their tracks, shaking their head. “And that's when I froze and ask myself… What the hell is wrong with me?”
“This match, this Inferno main event where so much more than championships; pride, is on the line… I started to wonder where had mine went? The same pride that allowed me to beat Misha Constantine at Battle of the Best? The same pride that made me a contender for one of the best wrestlers in the world in 2021? Recently, I have been so afraid of failure. Unable to move on from the past and keep moving forward, dusting myself off and keep marching on as I've always done before… I couldn't let go. I couldn't let go of the past. Of what Valentine did to me, of not winning the Tag Team Championships. You know what, I'll even agree with what so many thought about me; I was being a whiny, little bitch.”
“But that's through. From now on, I am finished being that way. I am finished being controlled by my own fault.”
MYOJIN turned to then face the water, slowly and steadily walking toward it. “Misha Constantine may be a former X-Crown Champion, but he hasn't a learned a thing since the time we last faced. Still running off of nothing but spite… and considering that I've been doing the same thing since the beginning of this year? I understand better now than never how easy it is to get sucked into that hatred and not be able to find your way out, not be able to think clearly. Misha, you haven't been able to get anywhere ahead because you're so focused on trying to belittle everyone else that you seem to never realize your own faults. And now, you're more focused on the fact that you were right- and yes I will admit, you were right- about Caffrey being an egotistical manchild than actually winning the match. You're so focused on Bloodied Fox and his husband that you have tunnel vision. Your life is nothing but miserable, and misery loves company- but I'll remind you once again: You are no God.”
“But at least Misha has earned his way into this match by the work ethic he showed last year, along with his accolades. Caffrey? Caffrey has done nothing to deserve his place here. Remember when you were worried about being a corrupt leader? Remember when FIRESIDE was supposed to be the place to give equal opportunity to wrestlers, not to be a vanity project for some basic loser. I used to believe in you and your vision for wrestling. I used to trust you, look up to you as a mentor, even- But I should have known better. Everyone- and I mean, EVERYONE continuously pointed out the same thing about you: You never truly changed from the self-absorbed, delusional dickhead from AXW- Except this time, you're so desperate to be liked and adored. You can't stand when people are more beloved than you by your own hometown crowd. You're pathetic, wanting to achieve the same relevancy you haven't had since the Purple Emperors. Thank you for giving me the motivation I needed to win; the desire to beat your ass.”
“Natalie and Vodka, the two champions in this match… There's nothing that I really have against either of you. Both of you are more than deserving to be called the Best Wrestler of 2021… But for you two, this is just something to brag about. This is just a little nickname you can show off proudly… For me?”
“I need this. I need this match to finally find my way again. I need to be what MYOJIN was once before again- No, I need to become even better than that. Instead of fighting against the waves and drowning, not being able to get past my lowest moments…” MYOJIN stopped as the shoreline was up to their knees now, a rather big wave slowly rippling its way toward them. The Shining Star was somewhat nervous, pausing even, and almost instinctually taking a step back- not wanting to relive that experience so long ago. They took a deep breath.
“...I need to let it wash over me and finally take a step forward. I am finally letting go.” MYOJIN gently braced themself, lowering their head as the wave crashed over them- They briefly went underwater, seemingly panicking for a few moments before calming down and staying still for a few moments- then rising their head above it once more. A star reborn.