Post by Dave D-Flipz on May 4, 2022 10:04:35 GMT -5
Here you go, I'll post it publicly after the show. It contains some motivation and strategy for what Primal is after. Of note, his hair regrows instantly and can kind of be whatever he wants, rope, spikes, velcro, etc.
*The camera opens up on a back alley somewhere in the heart of the city by the bayou. It is still morning so the streets aren’t as busy as they would be in prime tourist season and after dark. We find a shadowy figure behind a dumpster. Next to him is a small dog … a corgi … with a whole lot of blood on his snout … oh the figure isn’t concealed in shadow … it’s just hair.*
: "BORK BORK YIP GRRRRRR!"
: "Oh don’t worry about my face my warhound. I am not one to begrudge a little violence and chaos. After all, it is the main reason we visited the rumble. Delicious, *licks his lips* savory chaos. AWF United States Champ… dumped to the floor like a ragdoll. Super easy. Barely an inconvenience."
: "Bark?"
: "Hmm … yes, I’ll admit I a impressed by the hunter. He turned out to be more of a challenge than he seemed. Were my true face not obscuring the human mask underneath, I’d look like a slab of tenderized Salisbury steak! But my taste for chaos is not sated. It has been months since the Bastards injured me and stole my tag titles. And then I return JUST to have my home away from home close. Well I think we can find ourselves a new home … at a later date. The Hairman of the Board must have his quota of blood first."
*A small flier gets caught in a breeze and lands in his chest hair. His hair reacts by tangling around it and stretching the flier so as to be readable. The hair lifts the flier to his face.*
: "Super Scramble … oh … ho ho yes … this should serve nicely. A New Orleans based wrestling company. Oh this is where my old AXW friend Rob Arnold hides his children! Well well this is fortuitous isn’t it!? Buttons … it’s time to do a little … rearranging of the status quo. For one night only … or more if I am too impressive … I think the Big Easy is going to be MY easy stomping grounds."
*He snatches the flier and crumples it up and tosses it in the dumpster before he retrieves an old nokia brick phone from his left hip pocket … er … his left hip hair. He walks away from the security camera we are viewing as he makes a call*
: "HELLO! All my tasty morsels of flesh and emotion. Your hairman of the board is here to rain on your mardi gras parade!"
: "Woof!"
: "Yes Buttons, I know that passed, but other than booze, titties, and the parade … what other reason could there be to want to be in this dump of a state? Certainly not the sports. Certainly not the safety. In fact I’d wager 98% of the populace is here because they were forced or tricked into being here! Like all these wrestlers. Fooled by the allure of a return of the anonymous … and now stuck here fighting to be … next level. Oh the little morons. Stuck in their day to day, when I am ALREADY on another level. The only one I even remotely respect is the one here clearly because he is too insane and broken to realize the hell he is stuck in. And hey, world champ to boot."
*Primal, the hairman of the board, the beast of the north, the man from the darkest jungle, the monster without a soul … here in New Orleans to guest in the Super Scramble. He turns his steely gaze to the camera, the odor lines distort the image as he clearly has not showered in months. Grease drips from his copious amounts of supernaturally possessed hair. He smiles a demonic grin full of sharpened teeth.*
: "Cage aside, there isn’t much to like about this place. Other than opportunity. The chance to destroy the hopes and dreams, and maybe bodies, of some hopeful title contenders. And earn some funds for food for my warhound to boot! NLW, don’t be frightened. I am not here to steal your precious titles. I am here to cause pain and disgust. I am here to test the boundaries of the human spirit. I want to see how much I can bend Scott Hampton before he breaks … how much I can oppress Bloodied Fox, before he snaps. How much do you think Spike Kane can handle before he retreats to hell? Oh but that isn’t a sanctity after all. We’re here in N’AWLINS! And me? Well as my attire can attest *the hair dances* I got friends … on the other side."
*A hearty belly laugh as what appear to be will-o-the-wisps fly around him and then vanish as Buttons leaps at them*
: "If I have it my way, none of these nine others will even SCORE a victory. I’m playing spoiler. And then maybe, if I feel generous enough with my time to come back, I’ll pin one of the bodies as they are stretchered out. It’s a return party for me and you all are my party favors. HUZZAH!"
*He waves his arms in jazz hands, as his hair mimics him*
: "This will be just a taste of what the Network has in store for them now that I am back. And once I bury the beignet eating fools here? Where do I go next? Guess we’ll see. But for now … you can all get a sampling of Primal’s might. NONE of you … will defeat me. The Hairman of the Board hath spoken!"
*He snarls as he kicks away the camera.*
*The camera opens up on a back alley somewhere in the heart of the city by the bayou. It is still morning so the streets aren’t as busy as they would be in prime tourist season and after dark. We find a shadowy figure behind a dumpster. Next to him is a small dog … a corgi … with a whole lot of blood on his snout … oh the figure isn’t concealed in shadow … it’s just hair.*
: "BORK BORK YIP GRRRRRR!"
: "Oh don’t worry about my face my warhound. I am not one to begrudge a little violence and chaos. After all, it is the main reason we visited the rumble. Delicious, *licks his lips* savory chaos. AWF United States Champ… dumped to the floor like a ragdoll. Super easy. Barely an inconvenience."
: "Bark?"
: "Hmm … yes, I’ll admit I a impressed by the hunter. He turned out to be more of a challenge than he seemed. Were my true face not obscuring the human mask underneath, I’d look like a slab of tenderized Salisbury steak! But my taste for chaos is not sated. It has been months since the Bastards injured me and stole my tag titles. And then I return JUST to have my home away from home close. Well I think we can find ourselves a new home … at a later date. The Hairman of the Board must have his quota of blood first."
*A small flier gets caught in a breeze and lands in his chest hair. His hair reacts by tangling around it and stretching the flier so as to be readable. The hair lifts the flier to his face.*
: "Super Scramble … oh … ho ho yes … this should serve nicely. A New Orleans based wrestling company. Oh this is where my old AXW friend Rob Arnold hides his children! Well well this is fortuitous isn’t it!? Buttons … it’s time to do a little … rearranging of the status quo. For one night only … or more if I am too impressive … I think the Big Easy is going to be MY easy stomping grounds."
*He snatches the flier and crumples it up and tosses it in the dumpster before he retrieves an old nokia brick phone from his left hip pocket … er … his left hip hair. He walks away from the security camera we are viewing as he makes a call*
: "HELLO! All my tasty morsels of flesh and emotion. Your hairman of the board is here to rain on your mardi gras parade!"
: "Woof!"
: "Yes Buttons, I know that passed, but other than booze, titties, and the parade … what other reason could there be to want to be in this dump of a state? Certainly not the sports. Certainly not the safety. In fact I’d wager 98% of the populace is here because they were forced or tricked into being here! Like all these wrestlers. Fooled by the allure of a return of the anonymous … and now stuck here fighting to be … next level. Oh the little morons. Stuck in their day to day, when I am ALREADY on another level. The only one I even remotely respect is the one here clearly because he is too insane and broken to realize the hell he is stuck in. And hey, world champ to boot."
*Primal, the hairman of the board, the beast of the north, the man from the darkest jungle, the monster without a soul … here in New Orleans to guest in the Super Scramble. He turns his steely gaze to the camera, the odor lines distort the image as he clearly has not showered in months. Grease drips from his copious amounts of supernaturally possessed hair. He smiles a demonic grin full of sharpened teeth.*
: "Cage aside, there isn’t much to like about this place. Other than opportunity. The chance to destroy the hopes and dreams, and maybe bodies, of some hopeful title contenders. And earn some funds for food for my warhound to boot! NLW, don’t be frightened. I am not here to steal your precious titles. I am here to cause pain and disgust. I am here to test the boundaries of the human spirit. I want to see how much I can bend Scott Hampton before he breaks … how much I can oppress Bloodied Fox, before he snaps. How much do you think Spike Kane can handle before he retreats to hell? Oh but that isn’t a sanctity after all. We’re here in N’AWLINS! And me? Well as my attire can attest *the hair dances* I got friends … on the other side."
*A hearty belly laugh as what appear to be will-o-the-wisps fly around him and then vanish as Buttons leaps at them*
: "If I have it my way, none of these nine others will even SCORE a victory. I’m playing spoiler. And then maybe, if I feel generous enough with my time to come back, I’ll pin one of the bodies as they are stretchered out. It’s a return party for me and you all are my party favors. HUZZAH!"
*He waves his arms in jazz hands, as his hair mimics him*
: "This will be just a taste of what the Network has in store for them now that I am back. And once I bury the beignet eating fools here? Where do I go next? Guess we’ll see. But for now … you can all get a sampling of Primal’s might. NONE of you … will defeat me. The Hairman of the Board hath spoken!"
*He snarls as he kicks away the camera.*