Post by tuxbang on May 6, 2022 11:29:54 GMT -5
[Seen opens up to Tuxedo Mask doing some pretty cool calisthenics in a gym full of bodybuilders. Tux is hanging from a pullup bar and bringing his body horizontal, utilizing core strength and balance. The camera spies professional bodybuilder Joey Swoll in the background. Gradually zooming in on him, Joey watches Tux and gives a single nod of approval. Tux dismounts and grabs a towel to wipe away the sweat from his face. His hair is matted but shiny with sweat, jet black but with a few silvery strands that suggest a hint of aging to an otherwise capable and youthful body. Suddenly, his phone rings from his purple gym bag, which is decorated with adorable Japanese cartoon characters. He grabs the phone and begins walking to a corner of the gym while conversing.]
Tuxedo Mask: Yello?
[The voice on the other end is unintelligible to the camera.]
Tuxedo Mask: Yup, that's right. Hardkore World is back officially so I've been doubling down in training. You remember how that was, yeah? Pretty rough league and everyone did what they could do to survive. I mean, it was a controversial decision to ban cheating if that gives you an idea.
[Voice on the other end asks a question.]
Tuxedo Mask: Yeah, I'm going to do the opponent research tonight. Can't say I know much other than he goes by the name of Blaze. Kinda generic but you never know. Might be one of those RVD types where personality was the dump stat.
[The voice asks another quick question.]
Tuxedo Mask: Yeah, Blaze. Last name is Freya I think. ...What do you mean that's a first name? That's a girl's name though.
[...]
Tuxedo Mask: Uuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh what
[Tux stands perfectly still and you can almost see the wheels turning in his head. His expression is a mixture of processing and disbelief, an artist's painting of cognitive dissonance.]
Tuxedo Mask: I'm wrestling a woman for my opening match in Hardkore World? I don't know how I feel about that. Is this an insult? A reward? I'm basically getting to third base with a scoop slam so I feel like there should be some ground rules to talk about ahead of time. What if she goes for a huracanrana and I like it? What the heck was Jonnie thinking when he booked this Spice Channel mess of a match? Oh god what if she's one of those Chyna types?
[Joey Swoll sees Tux in the corner semi-panicking. He approaches him and puts a hand on his shoulder.]
Joey Swoll: Hey man, it's going to be okay.
[Tux is confused but rapidly breaks out of his worry. Joey's firm confidence in Tux is calming and focusing.]
Tuxedo Mask: Thanks man, I needed that. This first round match is really unusual and caught me by surprise. I've never had a match with a woman before.
Joey Swoll: It's understandable to react that way to something new and shocking, but you have to remember that it's 2022 and apparently okay to beat up women as long as it's recorded for television.
Tuxedo Mask: I mean, I really do want to be the first title holder for the league in this era. I never thought it'd start this way though.
Joey Swoll: It's not how it starts, but how you finish.
Tuxedo Mask: Wow, you're right. Thanks Joey Swoll!
[Camera zooms in on Joey. He looks at the camera, smiles and his teeth sparkle. Fade out.]
