Post by eddied on Jul 14, 2022 19:24:41 GMT -5
(Eddie D walks into the backstage and is met by a flood of reporters keen to get his take on his chances in the main event with Donzig and his loss last week. He looks exasperated by their presence but puts on a fake smile for a sound guy, mics up and waves them forward to ask their questions.)
Reporter 1: Eddie! Eddie! How does it feel to know that you are officially, and by any measure, second best compared to Billy Fowler after he beat you last week?
EDDIE: I woke up and realized life is great and people are awesome, and life is worth living.
Reporter 2: Are you playing down the huge loss last week? How do you feel the Wrestle UK fans will respond?
EDDIE: When you start out in the wrestling business, you make a lot of mistakes, tripping over your own feet and looking like a fool.
Last week was different. I ran that Basterd close, and he begrudgingly knows it.
I've been around so long and no matter if I've done good things or bad things, or my personal life has been good or bad, the fans have always stuck with me.
Reporter 1: Why do you feel you lost the encounter? Did you not prepare hard enough? Were you complacent?
EDDIE: I train all the time and the weird thing is I'm in the gym with people between 20 and 25 years old and I look in the mirror and I look better than they do, and they are young kids - either they haven't trained hard enough, or they aren't serious enough.
I prepped hard. I was not complacent. You can’t win every week. He’ll still be sore today from the beat down he got from me at points in that match up. Me? I’m fighting fit and ready to go. I’m preparing to put Donzig in a box tonight. Another day at the office for me.
Reporter 2: The people’s choice stipulation tonight… Donzig feels that whatever stipulation they put on your match it will be him that has the advantage. People say you only excel in vanilla straight up matches. How do you reply to that?
EDDIE: The best wrestlers, whether it’s a Hulk Hogan or a Rey Mysterio, are the ones who have psychology and can understand this business.
They understand how to hype a match and they know how to talk themselves into an advantage. This fight won’t be won in the tabloids. It’ll be won in the ring with all my fans behind me. I can throw down in any shape or flavor of match you care to mention. Can we not mention flavors and food any more…? I’m on a diet and I don’t need the cravings thanks.
Reporter 1: Why do you feel that you still have the highest merchandise sales in the new Fed when you haven’t set the Fed alight results wise?
EDDIE: I hate to toot my own horn, but I just feel that I know people and I know fans and I don't feel there is that Angelina Jolie / Brad Pitt barrier with me. I've always felt from everyone I talk to that the fans feel like I'm tangible and they can talk to me, and they know me.
Reporter 2: Hang on… Isn’t that a Hulk Hogan quote from a few years back? Have these answers all been Hulk Hogan quotes?
EDDIE: Would I do a cynical, reporter mind-fuck thing like that? Just to mess with you when you come at me with attitude and criticism?
Reporter 3: Well, has this all been Hogan quotes or not?
EDDIE: “Well, you know somethin', Mean Gene...”, Sometimes you just have to "Train. Say your prayers. Eat your vitamins" and riff with some quotes from the man you have loved and hated most in the industry at one point or another.
Reporter 2: You’re not meant to mess with us. We’re here to ask you serious questions and get serious answers for our readers and listeners back home…
EDDIE: You’re here to get soundbites and to misquote me into controversy. You're all here to sell more of the rags you call newspapers. You're all in a circle jerk of viral videos, clickbait and advertising money and you have the balls to say I am messing you around? If you try to misquote me today… for the most part… you won’t be misquoting me at all.
Reporter 3: How can we take anything you say seriously?
EDDIE: I hope that you don’t. Don't take life too seriously if you can help it. I am not a politician trying to get your vote. I am not a reality TV celebrity pathetically twisting my personality to make you love me. I am The Good Guy Eddie D, Main Event Eddie D and I am here to beat 7 colors of shit out of the man I hate most here in Wrestle: Uk. Well maybe the man I hate the second most. Mr Blood holds that particular crown. I fight in “His Fed” because that’s where "My Crowd" want to see me excel. His name may be on the lease, but that ring in there and that audience are mine.
Blood!?
DONZIG!!?
Wrestle:UK!!!?
BRING… IT… ON!!!
You can quote me on that.
(Eddie barges through the reporters who protest bitterly as he heads towards the locker rooms. The scene fades to black.)
#FuckFowlerFriday #MainEventEddie #BuyMerch #SWATtheFUCK
Reporter 1: Eddie! Eddie! How does it feel to know that you are officially, and by any measure, second best compared to Billy Fowler after he beat you last week?
EDDIE: I woke up and realized life is great and people are awesome, and life is worth living.
Reporter 2: Are you playing down the huge loss last week? How do you feel the Wrestle UK fans will respond?
EDDIE: When you start out in the wrestling business, you make a lot of mistakes, tripping over your own feet and looking like a fool.
Last week was different. I ran that Basterd close, and he begrudgingly knows it.
I've been around so long and no matter if I've done good things or bad things, or my personal life has been good or bad, the fans have always stuck with me.
Reporter 1: Why do you feel you lost the encounter? Did you not prepare hard enough? Were you complacent?
EDDIE: I train all the time and the weird thing is I'm in the gym with people between 20 and 25 years old and I look in the mirror and I look better than they do, and they are young kids - either they haven't trained hard enough, or they aren't serious enough.
I prepped hard. I was not complacent. You can’t win every week. He’ll still be sore today from the beat down he got from me at points in that match up. Me? I’m fighting fit and ready to go. I’m preparing to put Donzig in a box tonight. Another day at the office for me.
Reporter 2: The people’s choice stipulation tonight… Donzig feels that whatever stipulation they put on your match it will be him that has the advantage. People say you only excel in vanilla straight up matches. How do you reply to that?
EDDIE: The best wrestlers, whether it’s a Hulk Hogan or a Rey Mysterio, are the ones who have psychology and can understand this business.
They understand how to hype a match and they know how to talk themselves into an advantage. This fight won’t be won in the tabloids. It’ll be won in the ring with all my fans behind me. I can throw down in any shape or flavor of match you care to mention. Can we not mention flavors and food any more…? I’m on a diet and I don’t need the cravings thanks.
Reporter 1: Why do you feel that you still have the highest merchandise sales in the new Fed when you haven’t set the Fed alight results wise?
EDDIE: I hate to toot my own horn, but I just feel that I know people and I know fans and I don't feel there is that Angelina Jolie / Brad Pitt barrier with me. I've always felt from everyone I talk to that the fans feel like I'm tangible and they can talk to me, and they know me.
Reporter 2: Hang on… Isn’t that a Hulk Hogan quote from a few years back? Have these answers all been Hulk Hogan quotes?
EDDIE: Would I do a cynical, reporter mind-fuck thing like that? Just to mess with you when you come at me with attitude and criticism?
Reporter 3: Well, has this all been Hogan quotes or not?
EDDIE: “Well, you know somethin', Mean Gene...”, Sometimes you just have to "Train. Say your prayers. Eat your vitamins" and riff with some quotes from the man you have loved and hated most in the industry at one point or another.
Reporter 2: You’re not meant to mess with us. We’re here to ask you serious questions and get serious answers for our readers and listeners back home…
EDDIE: You’re here to get soundbites and to misquote me into controversy. You're all here to sell more of the rags you call newspapers. You're all in a circle jerk of viral videos, clickbait and advertising money and you have the balls to say I am messing you around? If you try to misquote me today… for the most part… you won’t be misquoting me at all.
Reporter 3: How can we take anything you say seriously?
EDDIE: I hope that you don’t. Don't take life too seriously if you can help it. I am not a politician trying to get your vote. I am not a reality TV celebrity pathetically twisting my personality to make you love me. I am The Good Guy Eddie D, Main Event Eddie D and I am here to beat 7 colors of shit out of the man I hate most here in Wrestle: Uk. Well maybe the man I hate the second most. Mr Blood holds that particular crown. I fight in “His Fed” because that’s where "My Crowd" want to see me excel. His name may be on the lease, but that ring in there and that audience are mine.
Blood!?
DONZIG!!?
Wrestle:UK!!!?
BRING… IT… ON!!!
You can quote me on that.
(Eddie barges through the reporters who protest bitterly as he heads towards the locker rooms. The scene fades to black.)
#FuckFowlerFriday #MainEventEddie #BuyMerch #SWATtheFUCK