.::The XHF Network Presents: Night of Champions 13::.
Jul 31, 2022 23:38:52 GMT -5
Mongo the Destroyer, Steve Awesome, and 10 more like this
Post by Dylan on Jul 31, 2022 23:38:52 GMT -5
The XHF Network Presents: Night of Champions 13
Time: July 31st, 2022
Location: Oakland Arena, Oakland, California
Theme: "Bang a Gong (Get it On)" by T. Rex
The smooth sounds of T.Rex’s “Bang a Gong (Get it On)” starts to play.
“Well, you're dirty and sweet
Clad in black, don't look back and I love you
You're dirty and sweet, oh yeah”
Clad in black, don't look back and I love you
You're dirty and sweet, oh yeah”
We cut to a scene out in the parking lot. The evening sun is still up, though on the way down. Frank Windsor is digging inside of his rental car as Billy Fowler looks on. Finally Frank is able to dislodge a cardboard cutout of Rob Riot from the back. He stands, satisfied, next to his usual Bastard running mate. Fowler laughs to himself and walks away shaking his head.
“Well, you're slim and you're weak
You've got the teeth of the hydra upon you
You're dirty, sweet and you're my girl”
You've got the teeth of the hydra upon you
You're dirty, sweet and you're my girl”
At the main entrance, to sell the club motif there are bouncers letting people in. The line is littered with fans and celebrities alike as everyone wants to partake in the events. Is that Stephen Curry? Of course it is, why wouldn’t he be at the Oakland Arena? At the front there’s a bit of a commotion though as the bouncers refuse to let in a small nearly-naked bald man who seems quite insistent that he get in. However the bouncers are much bigger than CAR driver(?) Copycat and drag him away from the line, one of them getting a couple punches in for fun on him.
“Get it on, bang a gong, get it on
Get it on, bang a gong, get it on”
Get it on, bang a gong, get it on”
Walking up to the building is NLW Heavyweight Champion, Seth Dillinger. He is carrying his bags and before going too far he looks up at the “Night of Champions” sign. It’s taken him over a year to recover from his brutal injuries and work his way back here. He nods to himself, remembering everything it’s taken to get back.
“Well, you're built like a car
You've got a hubcap diamond star halo
You're built like a car, oh yeah”
You've got a hubcap diamond star halo
You're built like a car, oh yeah”
Inside the arena, in one of the larger hallways we find two meaty muscular men, Death Trap and Redmond Fury on the ground. The two of them are pumping out push-ups. Given the look of determination in DT’s eyes it appears this is some sort of contest, at least to him. As the two see how many times they can push themselves up, Mistress Discipline cheers on her tag-team partner. The camera then zooms on a corner of the frame to reveal that Momoko Honda also seems to be taking in the view (though from afar).
“Well, you're an untamed youth
That's the truth with your cloak full of eagles
You're dirty, sweet and you're my girl”
That's the truth with your cloak full of eagles
You're dirty, sweet and you're my girl”
We move to see Nelly Angel with a microphone in hand talking to TEMERARIO, why he’s doing an interview spot with somebody is beyond anyone’s logic. However, it is cut short when the back of Nelly’s shirt is grabbed by Darlene Price, who pulls him away- presumably to talk strategy.
“Get it on, bang a gong, get it on
Get it on, bang a gong, get it on”
Get it on, bang a gong, get it on”
The camera moves to a door labeled “Watchable Guardians.” Soon Dylan Black trailed by his partner for tonight, null, make their way towards it. Once his eyes see the name Dylan shakes his head and walks off. null holds his nose, presumably in response to a stench coming from the room.
“Well, you're windy and wild
You've got the blues in your shoes and your stockings
You're windy and wild, oh yeah”
You've got the blues in your shoes and your stockings
You're windy and wild, oh yeah”
On the roof of the arena has been set up a cheap outdoor reclining chair. Rat Bastard leans back on it with a bottle of Bastard Brew in hand and sunglasses on his face as he enjoys the slow sunset, thinking about the violence he gets to inflict later.
“Well you're built like a car
You've got a hubcap diamond star halo
You're dirty, sweet and you're my girl”
You've got a hubcap diamond star halo
You're dirty, sweet and you're my girl”
In a training room we can see Ana Somina going through different routines of a workout. She’s already glistening as she pushes her body to be stronger and faster in preparation for her match.
“Get it on, bang a gong, get it on
Get it on, bang a gong, get it on”
Get it on, bang a gong, get it on”
In a back room the various XHF Network announcers and commentators for the show are eating from catering. Well, Randy Angel is enjoying his liquid diet with a few snacks. Him and Aleister Mayfield are comparing suits. However everyone stops when in walks Joey Hawke wearing what appears to be a peacock feather suit. The different fed teams seem impressed as Randy stands with his mouth agape.
“Well, you're dirty and sweet
Clad in black, don't look back and I love you
You're dirty and sweet, oh yeah”
Clad in black, don't look back and I love you
You're dirty and sweet, oh yeah”
A small child has found Donzig in the back and accosted him with a pen and some merchandise in a bag. The ODS try to move in, but Donzig decides he isn’t scared of a little boy. He quickly regrets this decision after taking the pen and being handed a magazine with Lord Dominicus on the cover.
“Well, you dance when you walk
So let's dance, take a chance, understand me
You're dirty, sweet and you're my girl”
So let's dance, take a chance, understand me
You're dirty, sweet and you're my girl”
We find a group of people gathered around chatting and laughing. It seems that Johnny Maverick is having a good time with them. After a few moments he pats a few of them on the back and leaves, as soon as he’s just a few steps away he shakes his head, wondering who the heck they are and why they were talking to him.
“Get it on, bang a gong, get it on
Get it on, bang a gong, get it on (ow!)
Get it on, bang a gong, get it on (ow!)
(Get it on!)”
Get it on, bang a gong, get it on (ow!)
Get it on, bang a gong, get it on (ow!)
(Get it on!)”
In a posh backstage room Venom and James Mueller are watching a replay of GUNS Fight Club over and over on repeat on a large monitor. Venom keeps rewinding it and pressing play on the several seconds of footage, gesturing at the screen.
Meanwhile Mueller is trying to point to his phone which keeps rolling a gif that is a little too hard to see.
“Get it on, bang a gong, get it on
Get it on, bang a gong, get it on
Get it on, bang a gong, get it on
Get it on, bang a gong, get it on
Take me
For a meanwhile I'm still thinking…”
Get it on, bang a gong, get it on
Get it on, bang a gong, get it on
Get it on, bang a gong, get it on
Take me
For a meanwhile I'm still thinking…”
Cameras flash and throw the light off of 22 championship belts all lined up on a table. We slowly pan over them before finding their current owner, Steve Awesome posing for the cameras while saying something we can’t hear because of the music. After pleasing the masses he turns to the camera, takes off his glasses, points and winks. However immediately Dirty Byrd jumps in front of him, taking up the entire frame and the camera fades on the XHF Phoenix Champion obscuring the X*Crown Champion.
Hawke: Welcome everyone to NIGHT OF CHAMPIONS 13!
Randy: Ooh, the unlucky number one!
Hawke: ...Let's not dwell on that. I'm Joey Hawke, joined here by the incorrigible Randy Angel but you'll probably be seeing a fair few of the other commentary teams here in the XHF Network tonight because this is the big one! Where everything comes together!
Randy: That's right, all of the world championships across the XHF Network are being defended tonight and a few other titles as well!
Hawke: Not to mention Cruiserfest coming to its finals as we determine who will be the XHF Junior Heavyweight Champion!
Randy: That's gonna be my match of the night- go Nelly!
Hawke: Well if your brother wins it'd be more than one match. More like three total.
Randy: Ah yes. Well that's what I said.
Hawke: No it is- you know what, whatever. And to cap it all of Steve Awesome will be defending against everyone else who survived Overheated to see if he can make it out of July as the X*Crown Champion!
Randy: What a night ahead of us! A Night of Champions! See what I did there?
Hawke: Yes I do, but let's not waste time and get right into it!
Hawke: And here we are with the first of our semifinal matches for the Cruiserfest fired up tournament. What a way to open the show. The winners here will face the winners of the other match coming up later for the right to fight EACH OTHER for the title.
Randy: WOOOO! My bro is still in the hunt for his ... own ... title! Man that is an odd way to run things. *Sips from a crystal skull filled with vodka*
*"Ain't No Rest for the Wicked" hits the arena as an imitation sandstorm is created in the entranceway and Aiden Merric emerges from it chewing nicotine gum and wearing a smug ass smile on his face. He spits the gum and puts a patch on his arm before stretching and walking to the ring with a purpose. He rolls into the ring and stretches on the ropes. The referee stops him and removes his various blades, ropes and other hunting equipment as he smirks. He then cracks his neck, waiting for the bell.*
Bonnie Jenkins: This match is a tag team match scheduled for one fall and is a semifinal in the Fired Up Tournament for Cruiserfest! Entering first, from Coober Pedy, South Australia ... the Wonder from Down Under ... AIDEN "OUTBACK" MERRIC!
Hawke: The hunter extraordinaire enters the ring looking to start a win streak after a string of losses at home in REIGN and in global showcases lately.
Randy: He finally got one over on Donzig at Overheated. One can bet Donzig was not happy about that! ... Or anything for that matter!
The opening of the TuPac’s “To Live and Die in LA” hits the pa system and El Combatiente follows his manager Javier onto the stage. They look around soaking up there surrounding until El Combatiente breaks into a full sprint for the ring and slides in. Javier slowly walks to ringside and takes his position at ringside as El Combatiente stretches in the ring preparing for his match to begin.
Hawke: And here is El Combatiente. He and Aiden are looking to advance here by eliminating the current champion!
Randy: But can he trust his partner? *drinks a Foster's*
Bonnie Jenkins: His partner, from Los Angeles, CA accompanied by Javier ... EL COMBATIENTE! Together they are ... THE PUNCHADORES!
"Love the way you hate me" by Rising Storm starts to play over the speakers, Darlene comes out eyeing the crowd for a second before she makes her way down to the ring, high-fiving a few random fans here and there, she circles the ring slowly as her song plays, she then steps back, runs and slides onto the ring apron on her knee, she rests her back on the top rope her arms draped over it, she sticks her tongue out to the crowd, she then throws her arms out into the crucifix pose with metal horns, slowly she raises her arms up above her head crossed, then throws them down, she then turns and leaps into the ring, tossing her jean vest towards Dylan, who catches it, and electrifies it setting it on fire, much to Dar's chagrin. She goes to her corner and starts to stretch legs waiting for the match to start..
Bonnie Jenkins: Their opponents, entering first, from Cleveland, Ohio ... the JRoK Ambassador of Violence ... DARLENE PRICE!
Hawke: Is pissing Darlene off a good strategy?
Randy: Dylan would know best wouldn't he?
The guitar riffs starting out "La Di Da" by Jet ring out as out from the back walks Nelly Angel with the XHF Junior Heavyweight Championship around his waist. The defiant tone of the song is reflected in his face as he looks down to the ring and the audience, some of whom are holding "#NellyisaHeel" signs. Once he's done scanning the arena he shakes his head, chuckles and smiles to himself. The 20 year ring veteran makes his walk down to the ring, climbs the stairs, and from the ring apron climbs onto the turnbuckle and holds the belt up before jumping off the corner into the ring, ready to start things off.
Bonnie Jenkins: And her partner, he is the XHF Junior Heavyweight Champion, NELLY ANGEL! ANd together they are ...
Dar shoots her a glance ... filled with malice ...
Bonnie Jenkins: Uh ... the Champbassadors of Violence ...
Cruiserfest: Fired Up Semifinals
Tag Team Match
Nelly Angel and Darlene Price vs El Combatiente and Aiden Merric
Inside the ring, after a quick discussion Aiden Merric is going to start. The other side of the ring the discussion was more of an argument, and Dar shoved Nelly towards the ropes with a yell. The fans seem to approve.
Hawke: Looks like it will be Dar vs Merric to start this one, and I can’t wait!
Randy: Nelly is clearly just saving his energy for the late game!
Aiden shrugs at Dar, and then comes in swinging with a few wild punches and kicks driving the daughter of the XHF legend into the corner. He fires off a few chops, and the fans give a mixed reaction before he goes to whip her across the ring.
Dar reverses!
Aiden slams into the turnbuckles, and Dar follows in to drive a knee hard into his chest with a leap that nearly sends her from the ring!
Randy: Damn! Aiden felt that!
Hawke: Aiden in trouble here!
Dar wastes no time delivering a few stiff chops across the chest of Aiden Merric as he trapped against the corner! The high knee strike and chops driving the wind from the Aussie, and then Dar calls for the Torando DDT! Aiden has a different idea, and shoves Dar aside to send her sprawling to the outside!
Randy: What the –
Hawke: Nelly didn’t appreciate that either, and the referee is trying to get him out of the ring!
Aiden meanwhile slides to the outside, battering away at the rising Dar with a few punches and knees before he shoves her hard against the edge of the ring. He gouges at her eyes, and then he shoves her back inside before he throws a few insults towards the angry Nelly.
Hawke: El Combatiente leaps to the turnbuckle!
Randy: I am not that drunk! Where was the tag!
Moonsault onto Dar! Merric yells at the ref who is still arguing with Nelly before making the cover!
1...
2…
Hawke: Dar kicks out!
The fans cheer for Dar, and Merric stomps at her before he makes the quick tag to El Combatiente! He comes into the ring, and wastes no time in leveling the rising Dar with a DDT! Then he drags her back to her feet, shaking his head before he hits a suplex off the ropes!
Randy: Goddammit! I need another drink!
Hawke: Aiden and El Combatiente came here to win tonight! They are not letting anything get in their way!
El Combatiente leaps to the ropes, and goes for the stomp! But Dar rolls out of the way, and Combatiente almost topples as his legs buckle! And Dar goes for the roll up, and the fans are on their feet!
1…
2…
KICKOUT! Dar dives across the ring, and Merric comes between the ropes to grab at her ankle! But Dar rolls over, and dives across the ring to make the tag to Nelly! The fans are on their feet as he storms inside, and it is clear he is not amused by the tactics of Merric and El Combatiente.
Randy: Fucking go! Nelly is pissed!
Nelly comes charging in the ring, and he started firing off shot after shot on Merric. He flung him at the ropes, and nailed a thunderous Spine buster on the Aussie. He came to his feet, and drove a clothesline across the oncoming El Combatiente! The fans approved, and Nelly Angel muttered to himself before he dragged Aiden back up to shove him at the ropes.
Hawke: Nelly clearing house!
Randy: Yeah he is!
Nelly charges forward to hit an European Uppercut on Aiden, that sends him to the outside! The fans cheer, and then he turns his attention back to El Combatiente! Before Combatiente can turn he is nailed with BREAKING NEWS!
Randy: Yes!
Nelly makes the pin, and the ref dives for the count!
One, Two, the ref is yanked to the outside by Aiden Merric! The fans boo, and Nelly is furious as he comes to his feet. But Dar comes running across the side of the apron, and dives off for a hurricanrana to the outside! The fans cheer, and Merric is down as Dar makes the tag to Nelly!
Hawke: Dar wastes no time in delivering a few kicks and punches to the slowly rising El Combatiente!
Randy: Yeah, I’d say she is fired up!
Dar grabs El Combatiente, flinging him at the corner where his shoulder drives hard against the ringpost. He staggers back, grabbing at his arm with a shake of his head before he turns to be leveled with the ‘Executive Orders’!
Randy: El Combatiente is down! He is lucky he wasn’t knocked out of his boots!
Hawke: Dar makes the cover but the ref is still down!
Nelly goes to the outside as the fans count reaching three before he smacks the ref awake, and tosses him inside! The ref crawls across the ring, and starts the count! One! Two!
El Combatiente kicks out!
Randy: This is trash! This is straight fucking trash!
The fans seem to agree, but Dar drags Combatiente to her corner before making the tag to Nelly. Nelly comes inside, and hauls the Luchador to his feet before he hits a snap suplex! Then another! And El Combatiente is down as he tries to roll for his corner. Nelly drags him back, and climbs the turnbuckle!
Randy: Nelly going up top, it looks like it could be game over for the man from JROK!
Hawke: Shooting Star Press!
But El Combatiente rolls away, and Nelly crashes down on empty air! He rolls around in pain, and El Combatiente dives to make the tag to the Aussie! Merric comes inside, running across the ring to drop a few double axe handles on Nelly! Then he scrambles to his feet, firing an elbow at Dar to knock her to the outside!
Hawke: Aiden is stalking Nelly, clearly ready to put this one away!
Randy: Stay down, Nelly!
But Nelly rises to his feet, and Aiden makes his move! Target Neutralized! The fans groan, and Nelly sprawls on the mat as Merric makes the pin! One, two– NELLY JUST GETS A FOOT ON THE BOTTOM ROPE! The fans cheer, and Aiden can’t believe it as he holds up two fingers. He argues with the ref it was a three but the ref kicks the bottom rope to show him. Aiden scoffs then drags Nelly to his feet, snapping him at the ropes! But Dar makes the blind tag!
Randy: Aiden missed that tag!
Aiden hits the powerslam on the rebound, and makes the quick tag to El Combatiente! El Combatiente leaps to the ring post, and he points at the downed Nelly before he comes off a 630!
Hawke: Nelly is out! It’s over!
Randy: Now I maybe drunk, but I know that Nelly is not the legal man!
The ref shakes his head, and confusion fills the ring before Dar charges across the ring! FASH STOMP ON EL COMBATIENTE AS HE RISES! The fans explode, and Dar lunges at Merric to send him flying to the outside before she turns her attention back to the ring. El Combatiente rises slowly, and EXECUTIVE ORDERS!
Randy: Dar just leveled El Combatiente and Merric! These fans are loving it!
Dar makes the cover, and Merric starts to come back in but is tackled by Nelly as the ref dives for the count! Aiden slams Nelly back first into the post and races into the ring and at 2 and 3/4 he manages to break up the pin. Aiden hauls Dar to her feet but she hits a Give 'em the Boot and sends Aiden crumpling to the mat. She backs up into the corner as Nelly tags her back. She races out of the corner with another Fash Stomp to Aiden. She then catches the rising Combatiente with a swinging neckbreaker. She points to Nelly and then at the downed EC. While Price hooks Aiden up in a sharpshooter to keep him down, Nelly flies off the top!
Hawke: ON ANGELS' WINGS! Nelly just flattened El Combatiente!
Randy: My bro is gonna do it and keep his belt!
Nelly hooks the leg and counts with the ref as Aiden claws at the pin while tied up. ONE! TWO! THREE!
DING! DING! DING!
Bonnie Jenkins: Your winners and advancing to the Fired Up finals ... NELLY AND DAR ... THE CHAMPBASSADORS OF VIOLENCE!
Randy: I KNEW HE HAD IT IN HIM! SALUD! *downs a shot of super sake*
Hawke: We have the ring crew down at ringside putting up the barbed wire around the ropes and the turnbuckles.
Randy: They’re also doing a couple of chairs, a table, and a few other choice items. This is gonna get bloody!
Hawke: You know I’m not sure that Mistress Discipline has been in very many extreme matches. She might have to depend on Death Trap to do some of the heavy lifting in this match.
Randy: She might be fighting right off the bat since I don’t know if they are even going to bother with tags in this match.
Hawke: Oh, of course they’ll tag. Why would they call it a tag team match for the tag team titles if people don’t tag in the match?
Randy: Maybe they’ll do it where there are two people in the ring at one time and instead of actually tagging, you could just leave the ring.
Hawke: They have to tag or else it would be “whatever the fuck you want to do” teams!
Randy: Ok! Ok! Chill, man. You wanna sip of my Bastard Brew?
Hawke: No? And I thought you only drank Super Sake?
Randy: I drink whatever, but I represent Super Sake. There’s a difference.
Hawke: No thanks. I think they’re about ready. Bonnie is getting into the ring with a lot of care.
Randy: Right? Don’t want to be the first victim of the barbed wire.
Bonnie Jenkins: The following contest is scheduled for one fall and is a Barbed Wire Massacre match! It is also for the XHF Global Tag Team titles! Featuring first…Yuki Sakaraba and Kira Izumi. They are Tokyo Mass Suicide!
Blemish By The GazettE blares through the speakers as the camera pans across the arena and stage. We eventually rest to see Kira Izumi on one side of the arena where the fans are, while Yuki Sakaraba is on the other side. They hype up the crowd as they walk through and down to ringside. They make it down into the ring now, doing a cutthroat motion and spitting out their famous mists into the air.
Hawke: TMS looking hot tonight. Think they can take Top of the Class down and win the tag team title?
Randy: I think anything can happen, except maybe that.
Hawke: Oh yeah? Why is that?
Randy: I think that Yuki spends too much time on special effects or she’s an alien. I don’t know.
Bonnie Jenkins: And their opponents…Mistress Discipline and Death Trap… the XHF Global Tag Team champions…Top of the Class!
The lights dim down and the Tron shows "Top of the Class" in big gold letters with sparkles. It then cuts to images of Death Trap and Mistress Discipline winning the XHF Global Tag Team Championships from New Age Killers with DT pinning Jason Long and their hands being raised. "2285 Entr'acte" by Dream Theater plays over the speakers. Blue and Gold lights strobe the arena as the stage and ramp light up again and Death Trap and Mistress Discipline hit the stage. Mistress straightens her collar and her title belt around her waist and begins marching to the ring. She gets ten steps away and looks back to see DT still doing his signature pose at the top of the stage, hoodie open showing off his tag team title belt. She marches back and grabs his arm and forcibly pulls him down the ramp to the ring as DT high-fives fans with his free hand. Mistress rolls into the ring and steps to the center while DT goes up the steps and looks out at the crowd as he steps through the ropes. He leaps to the closest corner and poses again as gold sparks shower from the ceiling. Discipline looks around quite unimpressed by all this hoopla. DT jumps down and the two hand over their titles to the timekeeper as the lights return to normal.
Hawke: The champions in the house!
Randy: Of course they are. We can see that, Joey.
Hawke: I was just setting up some hype.
Randy: Oh that. Alright. Go ahead.
Hawke: I already said my piece and you ruined it.
Randy: I think I will drink to that.
XHF Tag-Team Championships
Barbed Wire Massacre Match
Top of the Class (c) vs Tokyo Mass Suicide
As the bell sounds to start the match, Yuki Sakaraba and Mistress Discipline pair off while Death Trap and Kira Izumi pair off. Sakaraba strikes Mistress a few times with her fists and a couple of straight kicks, backing Mistress up nearly to the barbed wire ropes. Death Trap blocks a series of punches from Izumi before just deadlifting him up into the air and body slamming him down.
Mistress Discipline: Think I know not where I am?
Mistress does a drop toe hold that sends Sakaraba face first into the ropes where she becomes entangled in the barbed wire! Kira Izumi pops right back up and kicks Death Trap in the abs to double him over. Izumi applies a front-face lock to keep him under control. Mistress Discipline leaves Sakaraba and walks over to Kira Izumi and hits a double ax handle to the back to break the hold. Death Trap hits a high roundhouse kick that sends Izumi backward to Mistress, who applies an abdominal stretch! Death Trap turns around and is taken down into a fujiwara armbar by Sakaraba, who is bleeding from several cuts on her body from being entangled in the barbed wire.
Hawke: Sheer chaos in the ring. This is what happens when you have no tags in a tag match.
Randy: Ok, buddy. Off the soap box. We understand your point of view.
The ref checks to see if Izumi will submit, but he refuses. He then checks to see if Death Trap will submit, who also refuses. Mistress Discipline sees her partner in a predicament and releases Izumi to begin stomping on Sakaraba to get that hold broken. Sakaraba rolls out of the ring with Mistress Discipline hot on her heels. Mistress gets out of the ring, only to be smashed in the face with a barbed wire steel chair that lays her out and cuts open the side of her face that streams blood. Izumi grabs Death Trap and hits a brainbuster in the middle of the ring and goes for the pinfall!
One
Two
T-Death Trap kicks out!
Sakaraba gets Mistress up and goes for a sit-out piledriver, but Mistress hits a backdrop instead, landing Sakaraba onto the ring steps.
Hawke: Oh now that is going to leave a mark!
Randy: I know, right? I know from experience that falling onto metal steps will leave a mark.
Hawke: You were drunk, weren’t you?
Randy: Well, yeah.
With Sakaraba’s head hanging off of the side of the steps, Mistress runs over and drops an elbow to her forehead to knock her from the ring steps. In the ring, Izumi and Death Trap are brawling back and forth. Izumi gets in a kick that doubles Death Trap over. Izumi grabs him by the arm and whips him into the corner. Death Trap bounces off of the corner and takes a few agonizing steps away from the corner, barbed wire ripping away from his flesh. Outside of the ring, Mistress Discipline gets Yuki Sakaraba up, but gets hit with a jawbreaker that lays her out. Sakaraba climbs to the ring apron and then to the top rope.
Hawke: High-risk move going on here.
Randy: Is she going to hit Mistress Discipline or Death Trap?
Hawke: Oooh.
Randy: Yeah.
Kira Izumi steps up to Death Trap as Yuki Sakaraba goes for the double rotation moonsault! Death Trap grabs Kira Izumi and puts him in the way as Sakaraba comes flying toward him so that she nails Izumi instead! Mistress Discipline grabs Yuki by the ankle and drags her out of the ring while Death Trap applies the Death Trap in the ring. Outside of the ring, Yuki Sakaraba spits a purple poison mist into Mistress Discipline's eyes. She grabs a barbed wire steel chair and slides back into the ring. Just as Izumi is about to tap out, Sakaraba lays out Death Trap with the steel chair! Sakaraba gets Death Trap up into a suplex position and then lays his legs across the top rope as she goes for the dragon screw neck whip known as Perpetual Pulsar. Again, mistress Discipline manages to grab her by the ankles and pull her down so that Death Trap lands on Sakaraba for the cover!
One
Two
Th-Izumi breaks up the pinfall!
Mistress grabs Izumi by the ankles and drags him outside of the ring. Izumi takes a swing at her but she’s already run off. Puzzled, Izumi takes off after her, but Mistress turns around, runs back at Izumi, and BAM! She connects with a bicycle knee strike known as Final Bell! Mistress rolls Izumi onto the barbed wire-wrapped table that was set up. She follows him up to the top of the table, pulling him up to his feet. Inside the ring, Death Trap grabs Sakaraba and hits a forward falling Russian leg sweep, and then applies the Death Trap! Outside of the ring, Mistress Discipline hits a sit-out powerbomb, putting Izumi through the table! Inside the ring, Sakaraba taps out.
Bonnie Jenkins: Winners and STILL XHF Global Tag Team champions…Top of the Class!
Hawke: If they would have followed tag rules, I’m sure that the Tokyo Mass Suicide could have pulled it off.
Randy: If wishes were fishes, we’d have a lot of cleaning to do.
Hawke: What?
Randy: I don’t know.
Mistress Discipline ad Death Trap celebrate in the ring with their titles while Yuki Sakraba helps Kira Izumi to the back.
Hawke: And it's now time for a semifinal in the Cruiserfest Fired Up tournament!
Randy: Whoever wins this may end up fighting three times tonight! *burp* I still think Nelly is the best.
The image on screen drains of color. An insistent beat starts playing as null walks out, ignoring the fans. Then Trent Reznor's voice hits
"This is the first day of my last days"
A savage guitar sting follows and null walks on.
"I built it up now I take it apart, climbed up real high now fall down real far"
null times his walk so the lead in to the chorus hits as he has stepped through the ropes. He looks out, blankly, at the crowd.
"Wish there was something real, wish there was something true,
Wish there was something real is this world full of you."
null slowly gets his referee check and returns to his corner.
Bonnie Jenkins: This is a tag team match and a semifinal in the Junior Heavyweight Championship Cruiserfest Fired Up Tournament! Entering first, he is the man known only as ... null!
Hawke: I don't know what to make of this young superstar.
Randy: He's from REIGN ... those guys are weird.
“A SPECIAL PLACE IN HEEEEEEEE-E-E-E-ELLLLLL!"
The lights flash green as the riffs to Reid Henry’s hit new single hits the PA system, uplifting and electric! The curtains between the wrestling word and gorilla open up and Dylan pushes his way through them! He pauses, posing for the crowd before strolling down the ramp ever so casually.
Bonnie Jenkins: And his partner, making his way to the ring, from Boston, Massachusetts! Standing at 6'3" and weighing in at 218 pounds, he is “The Daemon of Mayhem,” DYLAAAAAAAAAAN BLAAAAAAAAAACK! Together they are THE BLACK HOLE!
Dylan rolls under the bottom ropes and waves his hand in the ring, creating a small lightning arc! He gestures in the boos from those in attendance and just gives off the biggest smirk before he slinks into his corner.
Hawke: Well Dylan seems confident in this matchup. He and Adrien have had a long and storied rivalry for the last year or so now.
Randy: I think Dylan believes even with one hand JRoK superiority will win out.
The lights turn off for a moment. The dueling guitar riffs from Simple Plan guitarists Sébastien Lefebvre and Jeff Stinco from their song “Last One Standing” as the screen reads “#Believe” in a light blue font. With a solitary spotlight on the top of the ramp, Adrien Cochrane appears the moment Pierre Bouvier’s vocals begin to echo throughout the venue.
“How many times are you gonna try to shut me out?
I told you once, told you twice, I ain't going to turn back around
You can say whatever, try to mess with me
I don't care, I'm not scared
You don't have to say you're sorry, save your sympathy
With a friend like you, I don't need an enemy
I would give you time if you were worth it
But guess what, you're not worth it”
Bonnie Jenkins: Their opponents, first, from New Orleans, Louisiana, weighing in at one hundred ninety pounds, he is "The Dropkick King" ... ADRIEN COCHRANE!!
Cochrane looks at the fans from the ramp for a moment, giving a smile as he makes his way down the ramp and to the ring, hitting as many high fives and fist bumps as he can on his way to his destination. As Adrien leaps over the ropes to enter the squared circle and removes his black leather jacket to expose his #Believe shirt, he leans on the ropes with his fist in the air to the sound of the chorus.
“Whoa-oh, whoa-oh, I'm always going to be the last one standing
Whoa-oh, whoa-oh, because I'm never going to give up trying
And now I'm ready to go, I'm here, I'm waiting for you
And I'm gonna be the last one standing”
Randy: And he has the mother fudging Florida Man as his second! That's like best case scenario. Or worst ... if he steals my sake again ...
"Gimme Some Lovin'" hits the speakers and the mother lovin' Florida Man comes barreling out of the stage entrance and down the ramp on his Walmart Mobility Scooter. He waves a Florida flag ... upside down ... as he drives ... right into the ring. His vehicle stops hard, launching him under the bottom rope where his tail springs him to his feet like he meant the whole thing. Adrien just shakes his head as Flo once again has stolen his ring attire.
Bonnie Jenkins: And his partner, from the primal instincts of Floridians everywhere ... he is the Florida Man! And together they are THE WATCHABLE GUARDIANS!
Cruiserfest: Fired Up Semifinals
Tag Team Match
Florida Man and Adrien Cochrane vs Dylan Black and null
Satisfied that the two teams have heeded his instructions, the match official calls for the bell.
Hawke: Both teams showed how deadly they can be together at Overheated.
Randy: That was last time, this is now. Past form can always be beaten by being better on the night.
The two teams quickly discuss who should start the match. Adrien looks like he wants to kick off proceedings. In the other corner, Null and Black exchange a nod of heads. With Dylan climbing through the ropes, Adrien’s fervor to start the match subsides, letting Florida Man take the lead.
Hawke: Adrien made no bones in the lead up to tonight that he was gunning for Dylan Black.
Randy: If I was Black, I’d be looking into restraining orders.
Raising a hand to the crowd, Florida Man gets the crowd on his side. A quick cut to ringside shows former XHF Tag Team Champion, Mr Blobby cheering on with reckless abandon. He holds up a sign that reads ‘FLORIDA MAN IS MY CAPTAIN!’. The sign is quickly removed and destroyed, not by XHF security but by NLW curmudgeon, Noel Edmonds.
Hawke: You can only imagine the conversations Blobby could have with Florida Man.
Randy: It’d be garbage. I know it, you know it and even they know it!
Null is keen to get into the match and rushes behind the crowd-pleasing Floridian and grabs a waistlock. Shaking his head, FM breaks an arm free from the hold and turns it into a wristlock.
Hawke: Rare greco-roman hold from the JROK man.
FLORIDA MAN STARTS BITING THE HAND OF NULL!
Randy: This is ridiculous. Null’ll need a tetanus shot or something!
The referee starts the count for him to break it…
ONE!
TWO!
THREE!
FOUR!!
The former XHF Junior Heavyweight Champion drops the hold and pushes his hands out, palm to the sky in a look designed to be pure innocence.
Hawke: How cheeky is he?
Randy: I’m not indulging you in this, the man is a cheat!
Quick to make sure he can take advantage of the farce, Null ducks down and grabs a schoolboy roll-up.
Hawke: Has he caught him off-guard?
ONE…
KICKOUT!
Randy: He made him work but no more.
As he gets to his feet, FM tees off with a crane kick before unloading with a flurry of kicks and punches that push the man from the Rust Belt into the corner.
Hawke: A great combination of triangle and square buttons, Button-Mashing if you will.
Randy: That’s actually the combo for a Super Saiyan Headsplitter…
Hawke: Really?
Randy: I don’t know or care, haven’t played a computer game since Leisure Suit Larry.
A quick forearm to make sure before Florida climbs to the middle rope and starts to punch Null.
Crowd: ONE, TWO, THREE, FOUR, FI-
Null grabs the waist of his opponent and charges to the center of the ring, hitting the Scourge/Savior of the Sunshine State with an inverted atomic drop. Leaving no time for his opponent to think, a quick drop-toe hold takes him to the mat. It’s quickly followed up with an elbow drop to the body of FM.
Hawke: Null has quickly established himself in REIGN as someone who is extremely competent in the ring.
Randy: He does everything well. It might not be the flashiest but there’s no wasted movement in his offense.
Picking his opponent up, Null whips Florida to Black’s corner and tags in his partner.
Hawke: Smart move from Null, putting Florida into enemy territory.
Randy: Take it from me, tag-team wrestling requires you to be able to isolate a man, cut him off from his partner.
Dylan is quick to unload with a series of forearms to the head of Florida Man. The Daemon of Mayhem stops to charge at Cochrane, goading him. Null uses the window to grab the tag rope and begin choking the Crocodilian wrestler.
Hawke: Unbelievably cheap move.
Randy: Black’s blocking the ref’s sight. Smart move on his part.
Cochrane gets into the ring but the referee cuts him off!
Hawke: Adrien is helpless to stop the assault.
Randy: He’s making it worse…
Black takes steps back as he continues to goad Adrien to get involved before turning around and utilizing his cyborg arm to unload with a stiff straight jab that rocks the jaw of his opponent.
Hawke: That Six Million Dollar punch!
With the referee now focusing back on the match, Null drops the choke and Black steps away allowing Florida Man to drop to the floor.
Hawke: You’d say that Black and Null have adapted to teaming quicker in this match than their opposite numbers.
Randy: They’re wrestling with their heads, not their hearts.
He rolls onto his back and starts making a noise similar to that of a hospital’s heart monitor.
Florida Man: BEEEEEEEEEE…..
Randy: Unbelievable that he is in the same ‘sport’ as I am…
Hawke: Dylan doesn’t look impressed.
Dylan looks down and shakes his head. He’s seen this before.
Florida Man: EEEEEEE……
Randy: How is he loved by fans?
Hawke: He’s an entertainer…everyone loves an entertainer….
The noise breaks whilst Florida Man inhales sharply and carries on with the noise. He hands Dylan a bit of paper, it simply reads:
‘AM DEAD. REALLY, AM DEAD. AM CAFF!’
The hush of the crowd allows the hugest sigh to emerge from Dylan. He goes to pick up Florida Man…
Randy: Why indulge in this?
INSIDE CRADLE!!!
ONE…
TW…
KICKOUT FROM THE BIONIC FROM BOSTON!
Hawke: We’ve seen him use so many ways to play Possum!
Both men rise but the now-rested FM leaps up…Monkey Flip!
Crowd: OLE!
Dylan rolls through but the Reptillian Rascal meets him…ANOTHER MONKEY FLIP!
Crowd: OLE!
Black gets to his feet and this time he tries to pancake Florida Man into the air…SMALL PACKAGE!!
Hawke: BIGGEST PACKAGE!!
ONE…
TWO…
BLACK KICKS OUT!!
Randy: Ridiculous name for a move.
Hawke: He just wants to make sure no-one gets the wrong idea…
Before the former XHF X*Crown Champion can stop him, Florida Man tags in Adrien!
Hawke: Now we get to the showdown the fans have been talking about in the lead-up to this.
Randy: Guardian fans. If Kanyon was still President, he’d have any person who has purchased Guardians merchandise taken off the electoral roll!
Cochrane charges at Black who leaps to tag in Null before rolling out of the ring. The attempt to grab his nemesis putting him off-balance means Cochrane finds himself on the wrong side of a back suplex.
Hawke: Adrien’s overeagerness cost him there and now he’s on the backfoot.
Randy: His opponent is planning a move or two ahead…
Null wastes no time in transitioning to a front-facelock and driving knees into the body of his opponent. He whips Adrien to the ropes near Black who drives a knee into the back of the Cajun Sensation. Turning around, Adrien is distracted allowing Null to hook in and pull of a textbook neckbreaker.
Hawke: Picture perfect in execution!
The REIGN star puts Adrien over the bottom rope and turns around as if to goad Florida Man…BLACK TAKES ADVANTAGE AND PUNTS THE TAP OUT FIGHTER IN THE HEAD!
Hawke: That doesn’t belong in a ring, that’s just common assault!
Randy: Great technique though, laces making contact to cause even more damage to the head of his opponent.
The crowd let their feelings be known on the less than sporting move but the referee was unsighted.
Hawke: The crowd are with me on this.
Randy: They’re idiots…
Null drops a driven knee to the head of Adrien and rolls through…STANDING MOONSAULT!
ONE…
TW-
KICKOUT!!
Hawke: Adrien got an arm up!
Finding himself back on his feet, Adrien reverses an Irish Whip and charges in…BACKFLIP FROM NULL….GERMAN SUPLEX WITH A BRIDGE!!!
ONE…
TWO…
FLORIDA MAN BREAKS UP THE PIN!!
Hawke: Florida keeping his team in this.
Randy: It’s about to get busy!
BLACK IS IN THE RING AND ALL FOUR MEN ARE IN THE RING!! The Southern states team find themselves on the backfoot as Black and Null reign down with strikes. They look to whip each member to an opposite corner…THEY REVERSE IT!!
Hawke: What can they do fro-
BOTH ADRIEN AND FLORIDA CONNECT WITH A HANDSPRING DROPKICK AND A HANDSPRING PUNCH!!!
Hawke: Great teamwork on display there!
The crowd noise starts to grow. Florida Man rushes towards Black, ignoring the match official’s attempts at clearing the ring…BLACK LIFTS HIM UP…SNAKE EYES SENDS FLORIDA ROLLING TO THE OUTSIDE!!
Randy: Veteran move there!
Hawke: We’ve got a two-on-one situation developing.
The crowd can now see that Cochrane is in danger. A stereo kick to the gut is followed by a double DDT.
Randy: Now THAT was teamwork!
Null goes to the outside and starts to climb, Cochrane finds himself in an Electric Chair Lift….
Hawke: What can they do now?
ELEVATED BLOCKBUSTER FROM THE TOP!!
Randy: That has to be it!
Null covers…
ONE…
TWO…
FLORIDA MAN PULLS COCHRANE OUT OF TROUBLE!!
Hawke: You can hear the crowd roar as he just kept them in the game!
The referee successfully negotiates Black back to his corner. Florida Man helps Adrien round to their own team’s corner and leaps to the apron, ‘covering’ his partner from Null’s high ground advantage.
Hawke: Florida is almost quarterbacking their route back into the match.
Florida offers his partner the option to tag out as he climbs in but Cochrane spots Null encroaching…dropkick!!
Hawke: And THAT is why he’s known as The Dropkick King!
Now he tags in FM!
Hawke: You’ve got to say that Florida is running on pure adrenaline right now!
Florida tunes up the band….the band has less rhythm than Terry Bradshaw in the bedroom.
Randy: HE’S GOING TO KICK YOU IN THE JUNK! MOVE!
SWEET CROTCH MUSIC!!!
Hawke: On point!
STUNNER!!!
Hawke: Can he pull the win out of nowhere?
ONE…
TWO…
Randy: Strong kickout from Null!
Null kicks out but Florida keeps him down with a knee. The Sunshine State Star offers the referee two crumpled dollar bills and tells him the speed he wants of the count.
Randy: That is a bribe!
Hawke: It’s two bucks, only a lifechanging amount for Copycat
ONE…
T-
NULL KICKS OUT EVEN FASTER CAUSING FLORIDA TO SHAKE HIS HEAD AT THE REFEREE!
Hawke: Florida seems unimpressed at the ref’s counting technique!
Being pulled to his feet, Null breaks the grasp of his opponent…RANA!
Randy: It cost him, he should have focused on his opponent.
FM tries to rush to his feet but is met with a swift kick to the abdomen…SNAP DDT!!
Hawke: Dropping him right down on his face!
Sensing his team have the advantage, Null tags in Dylan.
Randy: You can’t disagree when I say this team have more cohesion and smarts tonight!
Hawke: Don’t forget the cheating…
Black doesn’t let his man get to his feet, he drives a running knee-lift into the head of Florida and then tries to punch through his mask with that robotic arm.
Hawke: Once more Black uses that unfair advantage!
Randy: He didn’t choose the arm!
Another swift punch gets Florida on the wrong side of the ring to get out of Dodge.
Hawke: Dylan using his ring awareness to put FM in danger.
Black lifts him onto his shoulders, Fireman style…BACKBREAKER!!
Randy: Here we go…
NULL COMES OUT OF NOWHERE WITH A LEG DROP FROM THE TOP!!
Hawke: Great double-team!
Cochrane comes charging into the ring but the ref cuts him off and pushes him back to his corner. Null and Black take advantage of this and start laying the boots into the body and face of the former XHF Junior Heavyweight Champion!
Hawke: Adrien tried to save his partner but has only made it worse!
Randy: I’m amazed…
Rolling out of the ring, Null avoids being caught by the match official who instead sees Black pinning Florida Man!
Hawke: Could that deceit turn into profit?
ONE…
TWO…
THRE-
FLORIDA MAN KICKS OUT TO THE DELIGHT OF THE CROWD!!
Hawke: The crowd remain firmly behind The Watchable Guardians…
Randy: What a name…
Rushing to his feet, almost too quickly, Florida weaves a punch purely by being too unsure in his footing…ACCIDENTAL BACKDROP DRIVER!!!
Hawke: What a move!
NULL RUSHES IN BUT FLORIDA MAN HITS HIM WITH SOME FRIED CHICKEN….AIRPLANE SPIN TAKES NULL OUT OF THE CONVERSATION!
Randy: Foreign object! That grease’ll obscure his vision!
Hawke: Did Florida mean the move?
Randy: Does he mean anything?
The rotations have topped Florida off and he takes one foot towards his corner and face-plants.
Randy: It pains me that he has once held an XHF title!
Black starts to move once more, slowly. He sees Florida Man almost passed out on the canvas and starts to bring himself to his feet. He closes down the distance, Florida making slower progress. He can almost grab him now…HE GRABS FLORIDA’S ANKLE…
Hawke: Dylan causing the crowd to boo…
DESPERATION ENZIGURI!!
Randy: Florida was probably trying to snap his own leg off to escape.
FLORIDA MAKES THE TAG!!
Hawke: Listen to the crowd! They came for this and now here it is!
The cameras catch Black’s face as he starts to back off and consider a new approach.
Randy: Saying Adrien is as good as Dylan is like claiming your dog likes opera.
Hawke: What? He’s a former X*Crown Champion himself! He’s also beaten Dylan one-on-one.
Randy: Fluke.
Cochrane unloads on him with all the fire he can muster.
Hawke: What intensity!
A dropkick sends Black tumbling near the corner…A RUNNING KNEE DROPS HIM TO THE FLOOR!
Hawke: Adrien making sure he can stake a claim to being the better wrestler.
Randy: Outside of Cajun Country, he’s never winning that poll.
ADRIEN TAKES TO THE TURNBUCKLE…HE SIGNALS TO THE CROWD, MAKING A HASHTAG WITH HIS FINGERS…
Hawke: Could we see an Adrien Cutter?
BLACK CATCHES HIM OUT…SPANISH FLY!!!
Randy: Pandering to the crowd cost him!
Crowd: HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT!
ONE…
TWO…
ADRIEN KICKS OUT!!
Hawke: He escapes but how many times can he do it again?
Randy: None more times. That’s the answer.
A smile from Adrien is shown as he rises but Dylan charges in…BACKDROP TO THE FLOOR!!
Hawke: This match goes to the outside!
Climbing through the ropes, The Cajun Sensation looks back and sees his opponent looking groggy…SPRINGBOARD STUNNER TO THE OUTSIDE!!!
Hawke: ADRIEN CUTTER!!!
ONE…
Randy: What can he do to pin him outside the ring? No brains, all highlight reel!
Crowd: THAT WAS AWESOME! *CLAP* *CLAP* *CLAPCLAPCLAP*
Sensing the momentum is on his side, Cochrane points to the barrier.
Hawke: He’s not done.
TWO…
Null looks to intervene…FLORIDA MAN GRABS BLOBBY’S STASH AND THROWS IT IN HIS EYES!!
Hawke: SHERBERT! HE GOT SHERBERT IN HIS EYES! HE CAN’T SEE.
Randy: He won’t sleep!
Hawke: What do you mean?
Randy: Nothing, it’s just ‘sherbert’.
THREE…
Blobby looks momentarily mortified before marking out more than a K-Pop Stan.
FOUR….
ADRIEN RUNS ALONG THE CROWD BARRIER…DROPKICK TO BLACK!!
Hawke: Another textbook dropkick!...Why are you standing up?
FIVE…
WALMART MOBILITY SCOOTER OUT OF NOWHERE!!
Randy: Cause I’ve been sat on that all-night. Basket makes it easy to store my beers!
Hawke: Can someone get this man a chair?
SIX!
Cochrane lifts up Black and tries to pull him towards the ring…BLACK DROPS DOWN AND PULLS THE GUARDIAN SHOULDER-FIRST INTO THE RING-POST!!
Hawke: Game-changing moment!
Randy: You heard that clang, that did some damage!
SEVEN!!
Black leaves him no time to recover and rolls him into the ring. He swiftly follows in and immediately sets on dropping weighted knees on the damaged shoulder of Cochrane.
Hawke: Black now focusing on that damaged limb, sensing weakness.
Scooping him up…SHOULDERBREAKER!!
Randy: That’ll jolt the joint, maybe even dislocate it. No arm, no cutter - smart play!
Black takes a second but leaps to the top rope…DIVING HEADBUTT DIRECTLY TO THE SHOULDER OF ADRIEN!!
Hawke: Shades of Dynamite Kid!
Staying on the offensive, Black lifts Adrien up and throwing his damaged shoulder into the ring-post. Dylan lifts him by the legs…WHEELBARROW FACEBUSTER!!
Hawke: We know where this leads.
The cameras catch Black laughing to himself as he decides his next move. He sets him up…WICKED STEPSISTER!!
Randy: DYNAMIC OUTRO!
Adrien finds himself in real danger as Black tries to increase the torque.
Hawke: He has it hooke in!
FLORIDA MAN RUSHES IN WITH A BIONIC ELBOW TO BREAK THE HOLD!!
Hawke: Florida with a hold-breaking bluster of a buster of an elbow, if you weeell.
The Masked Man from Miami State stays on Dylan, clawing at his face. The referee starts to talk to Florida who nods along enthusiastically as if not fully grasping the infraction.
Randy: He doesn’t understand what’s going on, the man is a moron!
Finally making his point, the referee gets Florida out the ring.
Hawke: The ref finally regains order.
Adrien grabs a waistlock…GERMAN SUPLEX…BLACK LANDS ON HIS FEET…
Randy: Cochrane’s in more danger than he knows!
REVERSE HURRANCANRANA!!
Hawke: HEADSTRONG!!
Going back to the injured limb, Black twists Cochrane’s arm into a hammerlock as he pulls him back to his feet…
Randy: This’ll further work that arm.
ADRIEN TWISTS OUT BUT BLACK WHIPS HIM TOWARDS HIM, SHORT-ARM STYLE…
Hawke: He got out from the DDT but what now?
COCHRANE DUCKS…SUPERKICK!!!
Hawke: LIGHTNING STRIKE!
Randy: You mean Icon Kick!
Dylan and Adrien start the slow crawl to their respective corners.
Hawke: Both men know they need the fresher partner in the ring.
They tag-out at the same time.
Randy: Who will score first-blood?
Both Null and Florida Man exchange blows with neither man getting an advantage.
Hawke: Neither of them are giving any quarter!
The stalemate ends with a headbutt from Florida Man.
Randy: That should be illegal, who knows what he has under that mask. He could have a titanium underlay!
Black charges into the ring but ignores the action, taunting Cochrane to come get him.
Hawke: More goading from Black who oddly doesn’t help his partner.
FM grabs a front-facelock and hooks the arm.
Hawke: This could be a big moment here for the match.
Randy: Dylan has done it!
ADRIEN ENTERS THE RING BUT THE REFEREE CUTS HIM OFF!
Hawke: Florida Man’s in danger!
Looking for the Brainbuster BUT DYLAN SOCCER KICKS HIM IN THE FLORIDA JEWELS!
Randy: That hurts regardless of who you are!
NULL NAILS THE LIFTING IMPLANT DDT!!!
Hawke: DIVIDE BY ZERO!
Randy: He planted him directly on the top of his head, he could be knocked out!
BLACK ROLLS OUT THE RING…
Hawke: Dylan times his escape…
ONE…
TWO…
THREE!!!
Bonnie Jenkins: Your winners of this match, and advancing to the next round….NULL AND DYLAN BLACK!!!
Hawke: In the end, the match was only decided by shortcuts and cheating!
Randy: That’s not what I saw, nor did the ref!
Magnus: It’s time for a GUNS match which means Tom and I get to do commentary on the big stage.
Phillips: It’s nice to be here on the big stage, and here in the Bay Area. So many Oakland booties!
Angel: Are we in Oakland?
Magnus: Randy what are you doing here?
Angel: I went to leave after that last match, but I fell back in my chair.
Magnus: Well feel free to stay, coming in first is the challengers.
The heavy beats of "No Love" by Death Grips hits the speakers as the house lights shine down to the drumming beat over the speakers. Flashes of Jason Long and James Raymond with their respective singles championship gold appears on the Tron with each beat that passes.
"How the trip
Never stops
On and on
It's beyond insane
Why I set
Myself up
In a raging sea of flames?"
Never stops
On and on
It's beyond insane
Why I set
Myself up
In a raging sea of flames?"
The instrumental pours through the P.A. System as the lights come to life and flash down onto the stage, the New Age Killers logo filling the Tron as fans within the arena bang their heads to the beat of the song. The house light spiraled around the arena as the Tron flashes the team work of both Jason Long and James Raymond as a team.
"You're fit ta learn the proper meaning of a beatdown
Madness chaos in the brain
Let my blood flow, make my blood flow through you mane
You got no business questioning a thang"
Madness chaos in the brain
Let my blood flow, make my blood flow through you mane
You got no business questioning a thang"
Once the lyrics hit the speakers, the curtain flies open and The New Age Killers slowly walkthrough, making their presence known with each step they take before stopping at the top of the ramp and looking out to the sold-out arena in front of them. Jason looks out to the crowd, James crouches down and brushes his hand along the steel floor below. Jason taps James on the shoulder as he rises up to his feet and they both look at one another, smiling before looking out to the crowd once more.
“Never not on it, leanin' so hard you're ashamed
You can't dismiss this sick transmission huffs your brain
Exhale your will and forget I ever knew you
Fuck do you do?
Fuck a man wit hips for hulu”
You can't dismiss this sick transmission huffs your brain
Exhale your will and forget I ever knew you
Fuck do you do?
Fuck a man wit hips for hulu”
They soon fist bump and make their way down to the ring, sliding under the bottom rope and leaping up onto the turnbuckles, on opposite sides of one another, as they stand there and soak in the crowd’s positive reactions for both men. They both drop down from the ropes and stand in their respected corner, waiting for their challengers to enter the arena/staring down their opponents with a dead serious look to their eyes.
Magnus: Some people say there’s no build for this match, but this is a match four years in the making.
Phillips: That’s right Magnus. Four years ago to the day these two teams squared off for the global tag belts. The GUNS took the win that day, but since then James Raymond and Jason Long have evolved and recently held the global titles for themselves.
Angel: This won’t be easy for either team.
The lights to the gym shut off and the crowd begins to get on their feet in anticipation. The projection lights up on the main stage, showing the skyline of Atlanta and Ennio Morricone's "Ecstacy of Gold" begins to pour out of the gym speakers. Shots of Goldbear II trying to feast on salmon and cowboys riding horseback through the American West fill the projection. The crowd begins to sing with the music cheer for Goldbear II's appearances on the big screen. The final shot of "Ecstacy of Gold" has Goldbear catching and devouring a salmon in his mouth. Crowd massive pops for their favorite carnivore. A lone harmonica for "Man with a Harmonica," by Morricone as well, begins to play while showing Goldbear II dining on a bloody feast of salmon. As the harmonica begins to the pick up and is accompanied by an electric guitar, Venom is shown in the video, and then James Mueller, and even Charlie Velez. It cuts back to Goldbear II and then action shots of Venom, Mueller and Velez. Eventually the song breaks down and goes right into "Out of the Black" by Royal Blood. More action shots of the Guns are shown before "THE YOUNG GUNS" come up in text on the projection. The "Young" flickers off and it now reads "THE GUNS."
Phillips: And here come the champs!
The crowd pops as Venom and Mueller walk out in front of the projection and onto the main stage. The lights flash with every drum pop in the song. Both men look amped to be here and begin to walk down to the ring. Behind them on the main stage, Goldbear II comes out, dick and balls exposed, to the delight of every fan in attendance and watching at home. Mueller jogs up the stairs to the corner of the ring and pauses on the apron. He sways a little as he approaches the middle of the apron, one hand on the top rope. He leans towards the crowd, looks out, shakes his head at them with a smirk on his face, and then throws himself through the middle ropes on his feet. He spins around on his feet with his arms out to bit of nostalgic cheer. He jerks his arms to his sides and then calms himself down. Venom gets up to his feet and begins walking towards the ring and stops in front of the ring and looks from left to right with his hood still on and then enters the ring. Venom walks to the stairs with Goldbear II close behind walks up the stairs and across the ring apron to the middle. He and Goldbear enter the ring one at a time and walk to the center where he drops to one knee again and points to the sky. Venom and Mueller both meet up in the ring with a fist bump as they begin to take off their jackets and any accesories before the match starts.
Angel: I don’t like these guys.
Magnus: Because they took the tag belts you and Kris recently held?
Angel: No because they don’t drink Super Sake.
Phillips: Like them or not they’re legends in this business and the champs, but they haven’t been wrestling regularly while NAK wrestles regularly.
GUNS World Tag Team Championships
Tag-Team Match
The GUNS (c) vs The New Age Killers
The bell rings and Jason Long and Venom start the match for their respective sides. They walk to the center of the ring and lock up each trying to show they have the advantage, but neither budges and they release. They exchange words and then lock up again. Again nothing and they go again. This time Long get the advantage and pushes Venom back towards his corner. Venom steps on the brakes and pushes back and they again stall. They release and this time Venom steps forward and takes him down with a shoulder tackle. Muller tags, but Long quickly gets up and greets him with an arm drag. Mueller is quick back to his feet, but Long is as well and nails him with a forearm that sends Mueller into the corner. King moves in and makes the tag to Raymond. Long goes to grab Mueller to hold him in the corner for an attack from his partner, but Mueller rolls out of the way before he can and to the center of the ring. Raymond comes charging in and flies with a cross body attempt, but Mueller catches him and drives him to the mat with a body slam and quickly goes for the cover for a one count.
Magnus: Muller with the big counter.
Phillips: Quick cover too early to get the win though.
Raymond rolls out of the ring quickly after the count and begins pacing annoyed he got caught off guard and Mueller tags in Venom. Venom quickly moves to the ropes closest to where Raymond is recovering and he leaps onto the ropes for a springboard attempt, but James Raymond sees him and bails out of the way. Venom backflips into the ring and laughs as Raymond glares at him from the outside. Raymond climbs the steps and begins whispering to his partner working on a strategy while Venom yawns in the center of the ring. Raymond, now satisfied with the strategy, hops over the ropes into the ring. Venom quickly charges, but Raymond is ready with the drop toe hold taking Venom to the mat. Raymond is quickly on top and locks in a side headlock on the mat. Raymond wrenches on the head of Venom. Venom tries to get loose but Raymond grabs at Venom’s hand with his free hand and manipulates the joints of Venom’s wrist. As quickly as he locked it in Raymon switches it up to a front face lock and pulls Venom up and backs into his corner and Long tags in.
Magnus: Venom is being isolated early here.
Phillips: I know Venom has had some impressive fights in the Fight Club, but this is much different.
Angel: A fight is a fight, I’m sure he’ll recover.
Long hops over the ropes and drops and elbow to the kidney of Venom dropping one half of the GUNS tag champs to his knees. James Raymond holds his arms to as the ref yells at him to leave and exits. Long pulls Venom up by the hair causing more admonishing from the Ref. Long slaps Venom in the face and then pushes him with both hands causing Venom to stumble back into the corner. Long takes a couple steps back and then charges nailing Venom in the corner with a high knee shot and tags in Raymond. Raymond steps in and rams his shoulder into the stomach of Venom and then grabs him and tosses him out of the corner. Venom hits the mat hard and Raymond quickly locks him in an arm bar. He wrenches back trying to force the XHF legend to tap, but Venom will not give in. He scrambles around with his feet until he gets leverage and lifts up forcing a pinning situation. Raymond releases at 2.
Phillips: Veteran move by Venom almost kept the belts there.
Magnus: No way. Raymond has learned and grown. He held onto that move as long as he could to keep the damage on.
Venom quickly rolls towards his corner and begins to crawl towards the outstretched hand of Mueller. Raymond is quick to pounce, though and grabs Venom by the ankle and drags him back to the center of the ring before he can make the tag. Raymond with the ankle on hand locks in an ankle lock and twists Venom’s foot with all his might. Venom screams in pain with each twist. Venom turns over onto his back and rocks Raymond with an up kick to the face. Raymond releases and stumbles backwards into his corner. Long tags in and leaps over the top rope. Venom crawls towards his corner again. He sits up on his knees ready to plunge towards the outstretched arm of Mueller when BAM he’s nailed in the back of the head with a running bicycle knee strike, T-Minus. Venom is out and Long drags him back into the center of the ring. Long picks Venom up with a front face lock and then shoves Venom’s head between his legs, double under hooks the arms, and nails Venom with the Crown Tundra (tiger driver ‘98)! Long makes the cover, but no! Venom just rolls the shoulder up. Long slams the mat and gets up to his feet. Venom is barely moving on the mat and Long pulls him up to his feet. Venom responds with a desperation forearm shot that catches Long hard, but Long shakes it off and lands one of his own. Venom is dazed and Long goes to lock up, but Venom pushes him off and swings wildly with a kick to the side of the head that knocks Long down before crumbling to the mat himself. Both men are down and the ref begins a ten count.
Angel: I’ve seen that kick before in GUNS fight club.
Magnus: You’re right. It was the same shot Venom used to knock Long out.
Phillips: Only this time it appears to have knocked both out and could cause this to end in a draw.
Long shakes the cobwebs out and gets up first to his knees. Venom crawls towards his corner and is almost to the outstretched arms of Mueller when Long grabs him by the foot. Venom gets up to one foot and hops around, before leaping and catching Long with another kick knocking Long back. Venom reaches out and makes the tag! Mueller comes in hot and nails Long with a running lariat. He continues through and leaps at Raymond and knocks him off the apron with a flying forearm. Mueller turns back around to Long who is struggling to his feet. Mueller grabs Long by the wrist and pulls him into a clothesline. Mueller holds on to the wrist and pulls Long back up into another one, but he doesn’t release and pulls Long up for a third that wipes him out. Mueller calls for the end and lifts Long up to his feet. He pulls Long up onto his shoulder and nails him with a one-winged Angel! Mueller makes the cover, but NO! James Raymond dives in to break the pin just in time.
Magnus: What a save by Raymond!
Angel: I was sure that was it. So much for ring rust.
Phillips: Raymond was too quick tho. This match will continue.
Raymond drags Long to his corner and tags in. Raymond quickly gets in and grabs Mueller by the hair and pulls him to his feet, but Mueller strikes back with a forearm to brush Raymond back. Raymond strikes back with one of his own. They exchange blows back and forth until Raymond gets the upper hand knocking back Mueller to the ropes. Venom has gotten back up to the apron and makes a blind tag. The ref acknowledges the tag, but before Venom can enter the ring Long pulls him off the apron and the two begin to exchange blows. In the ring Raymond grabs Mueller and whips him across the ring. Mueller hits the ropes and bounces back. Raymond meets him in the middle but Mueller catches him and whips him into the ropes instead. Raymond hits the ropes and runs back with Kishin Hunter (Busaiku knee)! Mueller is out cold and Raymond makes the cover. Venom heads towards the ring to break it up, but Long holds him back and the ref makes the three count!
Bonnie Jenkins: Your winners and NEW GUNS Tag Team Champions.....New Age Killers, NAK!
Angel: They did it!
Phillips: We have new champs.
Magnus: What the hell was that?
Angel: A big win for NAK is what it was.
Magnus: No it was bullshit. How did he let that happen?
James Raymond stands and holds his arm in the air, but his celebration is interrupted as Magnus has a mic at ringside.
Magnus: What the hell was that? I don’t know what you global refs are rained to do, but this is a GUNS match. In GUNS we follow the rules and one of those rules are the legal man has to be pinned in order to win the match. Venom tagged in. You acknowledged it. Restart the damn match.
The ref hangs his head in shame and calls for the bell to restart the match. Raymond yells at the ref while outside Venom delivers a low blow to Jason Long and slides into the ring. Venom stalks Raymond from behind as he argues with the ref. Raymond throws his arms in the air and turns around right into a jumping knee strike from Venom. Raymond is dazed and Venom moves behind him, crosses Raymond’s arms and nails him with the Xed Out (Cross armed German suplex)! Venom holds the bridge and the ref makes the count for the pin!
Bonnie Jenkins: Uh...your winners and STILL GUNS Tag Team Champions? The Guns!
Angel: So much for NAK’s win.
Phillips: The champs retain with a hand from Magnus.
Magnus: All I did was enforce the rules. What was done was the right thing.
The lights of Oakland spread across the darkness, and Donzig stared down at the city from atop one of those glittering towers. The hot wind snaps around him, and he looks down from the edge before he snarls from behind his mask. His hand lifting to curl into a fist as he speaks.
Donzig: You can feel it on the air, can't you? Change. Destiny. Fate! All of it coming together all around us, Esmeralda! Because that is what is coming for you tonight! That is what is at hand! Oh, you thought you could steal from the New God, eh? That you could take from the Scourge! That you could get one over on DEATH IN HIGH PLACES! Well, no! No, no, no! Esmeralda!
Donzig spat, and he spun away from the edge to stalk forward across the roof.
Donzig: You think for someone who claims to be immortal, who claims to be eternal! That you would have learned one simple fucking lesson! And that is when you take a shot at the King? You don't miss, EVK! And I am still here, I am still breathing! I know, that there are those in the XHF who want me to fail! They need me to fail! But not tonight, Esmeralda! Tonight, once again I am walking out of Night of Champions draped in gold! And if I have to fucking beat you from pillar to post to do it! Because I am world wide, and nowhere on XHF is safe from the Scourge! But REIGN? REIGN IS MINE! IT BELONGS TO ME! IT IS DONZIG-GUN's!
A pause, and Donzig took a deep breath before he rolled his shoulders. His head tilted, and he pressed a finger against his mask before he spoke again in a lower voice.
Donzig: Esmeralda! One fall, two falls, three falls? It could be fucking 5, 7, or 11! The result is always the same, the end result will always be the same! And that is that I am everything I say I am! The inevitable!
A hand lifted, and Donzig snarled.
Donzig: See you soon.
Grandma Mary: Welcome! My dudes and dudettes! We are down to boogie for a chance to win the Silicone Cup here at CAR Night of Champagne!
Uncle: Night of Champions. We are happy to join Night of Champions.
Grandma Mary: Yes, the champagne was flowing at our CAR Tailgating event earlier and NOW. Now, we are hosting a roller rink race! The Silicone Cup is on the pedestal by the finish line. So without further ado, here comes our fist racer! Lord Dominicus, representing Bad to the Bone!
Lord Dominicus glides onto the roller rink and over to the starting line. He waves to the crowd of onlookers.
Uncle: What is he wearing?
Grandma Mary: The trophies from his other victories? Though I don’t know how he would plan to wear a breast augmentation trophy like the Silicone Cup.
Uncle: I meant under that. That is NOT a disco suit. Was he wearing that at the CAR Tailgating earlier?
Grandma Mary: I don’t even remember seeing him when I was by the fruit juice but I do remember seeing our next racer by the cake table. Everyone, please welcome kitty cat.
Uncle: CopyCat.
Grandma Mary: CopyCat. What a guy. He was standing at the edge of the buffet table but I didn’t see him actually eat anything.
Uncle: He looks like a light breeze may blow him over. I’m surprised he wasn’t carbo loading. Are you sure he’ll be able to carry the ball?
Grandma Mary: It’s hollow. I’m sure he’ll be fine.
On the starting line, one of the Forest Force holds a large disco ball out to CopyCat on one hand. CopyCat accepts the large disco ball with both hands and falls to the ground from the weight. CopyCat slowly gets back up.
Grandma Mary: See! Fine. Now, here comes someone I know I’m excited to see! Dr. William!
The representative from the Angry Mad Chemists (AMC) glides onto the roller rink like he was made to move on one. At the starting line, he hoists his disco ball in one hand above his head.
Uncle: Is he posing for a trophy? It's a bit premature.
Grandma Mary: But he does look good! And here’s our last racer, representing Mother! The Car is… a cat?
The two announcers confer with one another as a small cat in smaller roller skates on their back two legs is carried out to the starting line.
Grandma Mary: Please welcome Mimsy. Our CAR health care representative confirms the cat has been cleared for racing activities.
Uncle: Yes, but cats rarely follow instructions.
Grandma Mary: Mother’s choice. They’re all here though so we are ready to begin the race. This will be a short one folks.
Uncle: It's not the length of the race but race in the length that counts.
Grandma Mary: And I'm sure our racers will bring it today. The rink is a big oval but we are only using this side of the track for a straight line to the finish line. First racer to carry their disco ball past the finish line will win!
CAR Silicone Cup
Roller Derby Disco Ball Race
Bad to the Bone Racing vs The Angry Mad Chemists vs MOTHER. The Car vs BANG! (not Bros.)
Uncle: Alright, racers at the sound of the-
A giant explosion erupts behind the racers as totally indoor approved fireworks are set off.
Grandma Mary: And they're off! His lordship seems to have startled forward first. Fast reflexes! Like a cat! But the actual cat is pulling forward quickly.
Uncle: CopyCat, not an actual cat, has startled after the actual cat. Looking nowhere near as graceful as AMC’s William.
Grandma Mary: Did William just do a Pirouette?
Uncle: The graceful man is catching up and I think he just took a swipe at CopyCat. It’s going to be a tight race.
Grandma Mary: The actual cat paws past Lord Dominicus. Lord Dominicus flails an arm towards the cat and whacks William in the stomach.
Uncle: But William recovers as CopyCat tries to grab Lord Dominicus's coat tails. He misses and somehow manages to stay on his feet.
Grandma Mary: The actual cat just sat down in the middle of the race! He's three feet from the finish line! The other racers are approaching quickly. Better turn on the lights!!
The room goes pitch black before a dozen spotlights light up the finish line hitting the contestants' disco balls.
Uncle: My eyes!! I can't see! Who’s won?
Grandma Mary: You think I can see any better? I’m seeing spots. Arg! This is worse than the floof. You know what? Everyone wins! Mongo loves those.
Uncle: No, we only have one trophy. You’ll need to announce one winner.
Grandma Mary: OR. Or, we could tell everyone they did so very well and they all deserve to win so I’m keeping the trophy and they can share the honor.
Uncle: I don’t think that will please everyone. There is an actual cat on the rink. Can someone collect-
Grandma Mary: I can’t please everyone, but I can please me. Way to go to all our wonderful racers who really put forth a great effort.
Uncle: Look. I have the photo finish right here. You can see who is in the front of the pack.
Grandma Mary: Is that William or Lord Dominicus?
The two squint at the photo for a moment.
Grandma Mary: This is ridiculous. They both win. I’m not going to stare at a photo all day and delay the rest of the event for analysis. I’m keeping my boob too. Thank you, racers, your effort is an inspiration to us all! I look forward to next month when we start up another Sippy Cup Qualifier!
Lord Dominicus and William stand there dejected, heads drooped. The cat meanwhile licks itself while CopyCat attempts to stay upright in his skates.
Bonnie Jenkins: The following match is a ladder match to determine who will go on to the XHF Junior Heavyweight Championship match!
The guitar riffs starting out "La Di Da" by Jet ring out as out from the back walks Nelly Angel with the XHF Junior Heavyweight Championship around his waist. The defiant tone of the song is reflected in his face as he looks down to the ring and the audience, some of whom are holding "#NellyisaHeel" signs. Once he's done scanning the arena he shakes his head, chuckles and smiles to himself. The 20 year ring veteran makes his walk down to the ring, climbs the stairs, and from the ring apron climbs onto the turnbuckle and holds the belt up before jumping off the corner into the ring, ready to start things off. Immediately “Love the way you hate me" by Rising Storm starts to play over the speakers, Darlene comes out eyeing the crowd for a second before she makes her way down to the ring, high-fiving a few random fans here and there, she circles the ring slowly as her song plays, she then steps back, runs and slides onto the ring apron on her knee, she rests her back on the top rope her arms draped over it, she sticks her tongue out to the crowd, she then throws her arms out into the crucifix pose with metal horns, slowly she raises her arms up above her head crossed, then throws them down, she then turns and leaps into the ring, tossing her jean vest off either out of the ring or towards her opponent if they are already in the ring. She goes to her corner and starts to stretch legs waiting for the match to start.
Bonnie Jenkins: Out first, they are the team of the XHF Junior Heavyweight Champion and Darlene Price- TEAM WHY IS NOBODY HELPING ME?!
Randy: That’s my brother!
Hawke: We know. He’s also the Junior Heavyweight Champion and he and Darlene will have to climb that ladder to keep it on him.
Randy: Don’t call her Darlene, she’ll set your car on fire.
“A SPECIAL PLACE IN HEEEEEEEE-E-E-E-ELLLLLL!"
The lights flash green as the riffs to Reid Henry’s hit new single hits the PA system, uplifting and electric! The curtains between the wrestling word and gorilla open up and Dylan pushes his way through them! He pauses, posing for the crowd before strolling down the ramp ever so casually. Dylan rolls under the bottom ropes and waves his hand in the ring, creating a small lightning arc! He gestures in the boos from those in attendance and just gives off the biggest smirk before he slinks into his corner. Meanwhile, the image on screen drains of color. An insistent beat starts playing as null walks out, ignoring the fans. Then Trent Reznor's voice hits
"This is the first day of my last days"
A savage guitar sting follows and null walks on.
"I built it up now I take it apart, climbed up real high now fall down real far"
null times his walk so the lead in to the chorus hits as he has stepped through the ropes. He looks out, blankly, at the crowd.
"Wish there was something real, wish there was something true,
Wish there was something real is this world full of you."
Wish there was something real is this world full of you."
null slowly gets his referee check and returns to his corner.
Bonnie Jenkins: And their opponents...making his way to the ring, from Boston Massachusetts! Standing at 6'3" and weighing in at 218 pounds, he is “The Daemon of Mayhem,” DYLAAAAAAAAAAN BLAAAAAAAAAACK! And his partner null- they are.....THE BLACK HOLE!
Hawke: And here are the challengers to Nelly’s throne.
Randy: This is a tough match for me. On one hand we have my brother and a fellow J-Roker. On the other side we have another fellow J-Roker and a guy with a really cool mask and I love cool masks.
Hawke: Wait, you’re not automatically rooting for your brother?
Randy: Well, when you say it like that… Go Nelly.
Cruiserfest: Fired Up Finals
Tag Team Ladder Match
Nelly Angel and Darlene Price vs Dylan Black and null
The two teams stand in the ring as the bell rings. The four competitors take a look around at all the ladders surrounding the ring and up the ramp way. Each person is carrying a little bit of injury from their previous bouts and seem slightly reluctant to get right into it, except Dar who breaks the monotony by dropping and rolling out of the ring to look for a weapon of destruction. Dylan sees what his fellow partner in violence and also drops and rolls out looking for a weapon. In the ring null and Nelly hook up and begin jostling around the ring. null gains the early advantage by pushing Nelly back into the corner. null releases and begins laying in chops to the chest of the champion. Outside of the ring Dar has reached a ladder and closes it up to bring it in the ring, but Dylan cuts her off by grabbing the ladder. They fight back and forth for the ladder then Dar let’s go as Dylan is pulling causing him to stumble back into the ring barrier. Dar runs and drop kicks the ladder smashing her regular partner between the ring barrier and the ladder. In the ring Nelly blocks one of null’s chops and turns the momentum around putting null in the corner and laying in chops of his own. Outside Dar has pulled a steel chair from under the ring. She yells out for Nelly and tosses the chair to him, and when Nelly looks his reaction isn’t fast enough and the chair hits him in the face and ricochets and hits null as well. Dar shrugs her shoulders and goes to the closest ladder and folds it up and slides it into the ring.
Hawke: Darle…
Randy: Dar.
Hawke: Is a one woman wrecking crew here early.
Randy: She’s a violent one and she does not discriminate.
Hawke: Clearly as she already hit her own partner once.
With the ladder in the ring Dar goes to slide in after it, but Dylan has recovered and grabs her by the foot stopping her. He yanks on her foot and pulls her out of the ring and nails her with consecutive forearm shots stunning his regular tag team partner. Dylan climbs up onto the apron, takes a look over his shoulder to see the dazed Dar and jumps with a moonsault off the apron to lay out Dar. Dylan then slides into the ring where both null and Nelly are shaking the cobwebs out from the chair shot. Nelly is the first to fully recover and nails null with a forearm shot sending him right. The champion moves in to attack further, but null shoves Nelly with both hands in the chest and Nelly stumbles back into the grasp of Dylan who delivers a German suplex on the ladder!
Randy: Oh no! My brother!
Hawke: Huge teamwork there by two men who will have to face later tonight should they win.
Nelly rolls off the ladder holding his upper back in pain and stops near the ring ropes. Dylan motions to null to help him set up the ladder. The two set up the ladder and both decide to climb. They get up to the top when Dylan notices something he didn’t want to see, Dar standing in the ring apron with that wild look in her eyes. Dar jumps up onto the ropes and spring boards with a shotgun drop kick to the side of the ladder. The ladder tumbles over and both Dylan and null are crotched on the top rope.
Randy: Oof!
Hawke: Oof!
Crowd: OOF!
Dar is quick back up to her feet and she moves over and checks on her partner. Nelly motions that he’s going to be alright and begins to pull himself up with the ring ropes while Dar again slides outside of the ring. Nelly is up and sees his two opponents strung out on the ropes. He runs at Dylan and nails him with a forearm sending the Visual-Kai Champion to the outside. Outside of the ring Dar pulls a table out from under the ring, and then slides it in the ring. Dar isn’t done, though, as she pulls another out and slides it in as well. Inside the ring Nelly has climbed up to the top turnbuckle. Nelly takes a deep breath and then runs the ropes nailing null with a stiff kick that sends him tumbling into the ring. Nelly also falls off but lands on his feet.
Hawke: What a move by Nelly. Very athletic maneuver.
Randy: I didn’t know he had it in him.
Hawke: In an event like this you have to pull new tricks out of the bag.
Nelly takes a deep breath for landing the maneuver while Dar is back in the ring setting up the tables. First she places the ladder back into the center of the ring and sets up the tables on either side of the ladder. Meanwhile Nelly lifts null up to his feet and grabs him for a suplex, but null puts his leg around Nelly’s to block. Nelly lifts again, but again null blocks. null then lifts Nelly up and turns slightly and drops Nelly with a vertical suplex causing Nelly’s backside to hit the bottom turnbuckle. null stands up just as Dar charges at him. null sees her coming and lowers his head and flips Dar up, but Dar keeps her balance and lands on the top turnbuckle. null turns around to see his carnage but is instead caught with a flying kick to the head of null taking him down. Dar is fired up and that can only mean one thing, fire. She pulls a tiny of lighter fluid and a zippo from her tights and sprays the lighter fluid over the nearest table. With violence in her eyes she lights the lighter up, but before she can set the table on fire null gets back up and kicks the lighter out of her hands.
Hawke: null just adverted disaster there.
Randy: If I know two things in life it’s that I love Super Sake and Dar likes fire. She’s going to find a way to light that table.
Dar turns to null and swings wildly, but null ducks it and kicks Dar in the gut. null pulls Dar’s head between his legs and lifts he up for a power bomb. He turns and bounces Dar off the top rope and spins her around to nail a sit out power bomb that shakes the ring. Dar is out and rolls away from null. null gets up to his feet and surveys the carnage. He’s the only one up with the only one stirring is his partner Dylan on the outside. null takes this opportunity to climb the ladder with no one to stop him. Nelly stirs in the corner and grabs at his back, but quickly moves to the ladder after he sees null nearing the top. He climbs up the same side as null and pushes up even with his opponent. The two begin exchanging blows with Nelly eventually gaining the upper hand. Nelly grabs null by the head and flips off the ladder nailing The Exclusive (slides bread into an x-factor) off of the ladder!
Hawke: Oh my god they’re both dead!
Randy: No way. My brother will get up from this and win the match. He knows what he’s doing.
Hawke: He may but that was a huge fall from the ladder and now Dylan is up to his feet and he’s fresh.
Nelly slowly pulls himself up to his feet with the ropes after the fall. He’s smiling as the crowd are screaming his name, but he doesn’t see Dylan perched on the top rope. Nelly turns and as he does Dylan leaps off with a shot gun drop kick. Dylan is quick back to his feet and let’s out a primal scream before reaching down and lifting Nelly up. Dylan laughs in his face before hooking him up and nailing him with the Royal Massacre (package pile driver)! Dylan pushes Nelly out of the ring and turns his attention to the ladder.
Randy: Nooooooooo!
Hawke: The champ has been taken out and there’s no one to stop Dylan.
Randy: Dar is stirring. Get up Dar and set him on fire!
Dylan begins his decent with no one in sight. He climbs rung by rung and is nearly to the top when Dar gets to the bottom of the opposite side of the ladder. Dylan has reached the top and is grabbing at the prize, but Dar begins to climb quickly and cuts him off. The two members of EVE begin exchanging strikes back and forth. Each has a table behind them so whomever doesn’t get the upper hand is going to crash through a table. The blows continue back and forth until Dar gets the upper hand with a stiff punch that sends their opponent off and crashing through the table! She grabs the prize and the bell rings!
Bonnie Jenkins: Your winners and moving on to the Junior Heavyweight Championship match.........DARLENE PRICE AND NELLY ANGEL!
Nelly slides into the ring as Dar jumps down, THEY HUG! Nelly holds up his soon-to-be-opponent's hand in celebration- forgetting that Miss Price is his soon-to-be-opponent. Dar doesn't though and suddenly SHE SHOOTS A FIREBALL RIGHT IN HIS FACE!
Randy: WHAT!? WHAT THE F-
Hawke: Oh my gosh!
Nelly grabs his face. Darlene would continue the onslaught but she's quickly pulled away by officials as Dylan laughs from the outside.
We cut to the back where El Combatiente and his manager Javier are walking through the halls. El Combatiente’s head is hanging low and Javier for once isn’t speaking. He knows his client is upset. They reach the locker room and stop. Javier stops his client before he opens the door and looks his client in the eyes.
Javier: Sé que estás molesto por no haber ido más lejos en el Cruiserfest, pero tendrás otra oportunidad. Siempre lo haces. Solo tenemos que seguir moliendo.
(I know you’re upset you didn’t go further in Cruiserfest, but you’ll get another shot. You always do. We just have to keep grinding.)
El Combatiente does not respond, he just nods his head.
Javier: Voy a llamar al coche. No necesitamos hacer medios de comunicación hoy. Reúne tus cosas y volveremos al hotel.
(I’m going to go call the car. We don’t need to do media today. Get your stuff together and we’ll back to the hotel.)
Again, El Combatiente just nods his head. He watches as his manager walks away before opening the door to the locker room and stepping inside. He’s greeted by a familiar voice.
El Rey: I was wrong about you.
El Combatiente stops in the door way shocked as he sees the son of the one man he despises the most sitting in the locker room with the Doom Metal Championship sitting into his lap.
El Combatiente: ¿Qué?
(What?)
El Rey: There’s no way you could be my dad. While you’re here losing once again in the earlier rounds, my dad is kicking peoples faces in at the Guns Fight Club. Even if that wasn’t enough he wouldn’t be as excited as you are about winning this loser title.
El Rey slaps the title while El Combatiente looks at him confused not understanding quite what he is saying. El Rey smirks and stands up, belt still in hand.
El Rey: That’s right. You still don’t speak English. Let me help you. Me equivoqué. No podrías ser mi padre. Eres un puto perdedor. Mi padre nunca querría este cinturón perdedor.
(I was wrong. You couldn’t be my dad. You’re a fucking loser. My dad would never want this loser belt.)
On the last word El Rey leaps and strikes El Combatiente in the face with the Doom Metal Championship. El Combatiente falls in a heap and El Rey stands over him and looks down at his nemesis. He drops the belt onto El Combatiente’s chest.
El Rey: When I came here I thought you were special. You’re not special. I’m fucking special. I should have been on this show tonight, not you. Now, everyone will know it.
El Rey reaches down and pulls El Combatiente up to his feet and gabs him by the side and tosses him into the lockers. Clothes fly from the impact and El Rey laughs as he exits the locker room leaving El Combatiente in a heap alone in the locker room.
Hawke: What a great show we’ve had tonight, and we’re not even halfway through it! Now it’s time for our first of two J-ROK matches.
Randy: This is going to be a pretty important match for both women tonight. Shizuku is apart of SKY Force, a group i know all too well. She may be great in tag team wrestling, but in singles action she’s been hit or miss the past few years. Tonight she’s going to have to really work hard to beat the champion.
Hawke: Speaking of the champion, she’s the first and only ever two time XHF Women’s Champion. If my notes serve me right, she’s been groomed to being the next ace of the company for years. Getting victories over legends like Rat Bastard and even managing to draw with top talents like STRiFE and Fukushima Zombie. She even took Dylan Black to his limits during his X*Crown run.
Bonnie Jenkins: This match is set for one fall and is a falls count anywhere match to crown the final XHF Women’s Champion! Introducing first, standing in at 5’1 and weighing in tonight at 122 pounds. Coming from Asahikawa, Hokkaido, Japan, representing SKY Force, she is Shizuku Yamamoto!
"Oh yeaaaaaaaah
Better watch out for us now
We're gonna run this town"
Better watch out for us now
We're gonna run this town"
"Run This Town" by GENERATIONS plays into the arena as four women appear on stage...Rin Kubo, Shizuku Yamamoto, Hayley Grimes and Tabby Scratch. Miss Scratch and Miss Grimes are holding a SKY Force Fund banner in their hands while the other two glance at each other and press a fist towards each other before the quartet begin to make their way down the ramp.
Bonnie Jenkins: And her opponent, standing in at 5’1 and weighing in at 114 pounds, from Kyoto, Japan she is the REIGNING DEFENDING XHF Women’s Champion! She is “The Star Warrior” Momoko Honda!
By the time they've been announced the four of them are sitting on the apron as Hayley let Tabby be the sole holder of the banner to share a kiss with Shizuku before all four of them roll under the bottom rope. Rin and Shizuku climb up the furthest corner away together and stand back-to-back, on foot on the middle turnbuckle and the other on the top turnbuckle. Rin has her right fist out towards the crowd and her left on her right breast while Shizuku mirrors her. Hayley and Tabby, after the latter leaves the banner hanging off the top rope facing the hardcam, mimics the other two at a different corner with the former on the left and the latter on the right. The fans give a mixed reaction to Shizuku as she steps up and raises her arm. She looks determined tonight to bring glory back to SKY Force.
Randy: Yamamoto is trying to show the world she can make it as a singles wrestler, while Honda is going to try and cement her legacy by being the final champion tonight.
Hawke: that’s right, tonight will crown the final XHF Women’s Champion. J-ROK will be holding a tournament starting August 12th to crown a new XHF Hardcore Champion. A belt recently brought back from the archives.
Hawke: that’s right, tonight will crown the final XHF Women’s Champion. J-ROK will be holding a tournament starting August 12th to crown a new XHF Hardcore Champion. A belt recently brought back from the archives.
As "Rising Hope" by Lisa gears up, Momoko makes her way to the stage. She rises a single finger up in the air, feeling the crowds cheer rain down on her. She finally makes her way to the ring, greeting the fans as she makes her way down the ramp. Momoko climbs on the apron, she makes her way to the top rope and looks down at the fans. Before she finally raises another finger in the air. After some seconds Momoko, jumps down and makes her way to the middle of the ring, displaying a striking pose. Momo-chan goes to the nearest corner and awaits for the official to start the match. The champion gets cheered by the fans as she raises her hand in the air and bows.
XHF Women's Championship
Falls Count Anywhere Match
Momoko Honda(c.) VS Shizuku Yamamoto
The two women stare at one another before the bell rings and we’re off to the races with Yamamoto and Honda locking up in an elbow and tie up. Yamamoto pushes the champ into the ropes. The referee starts the five count. She pushes her there some more before washing her face with a forearm. Honda charges back with one of her own. The two women skip the feeling out process and get straight to it. Hitting each other back and forth with forearms. Shizuku would miss one and Momoko would catch her with a german suplex and bridge for the early pin.
ONE!
T-
No a kick out by the challenger. Honda would lock in a headlock onto her opponent. Keeping on the offense. Shizuku would manage to get up to a knee for a moment before being driven back down to the ground. She’d roll and slip to a sitting position, managing to get back up to one knee. She’d quickly elbow the champ in the gut before getting up to both feet, grabbing honda around the waist and lifting her up for a backdrop driver. Both women would lay on the ground now, trying to recuperate from the onslaught.
Hawke: a pretty technical matchup so far Randy, how long do you think it’ll take before we see a weapon?
Randy: just give it a few more, they always like to build up to these things before they turn it into a spot fest.
The two women get back up to their feet. Momoko runs towards the challenger, but is evaded and thrown into the ropes. Yamamoto goes for a rollup, but Honda rolls through and gets out of it, getting on her feet and bouncing into the ropes behind her. She comes back and goes for a low dropkick. It’s dodged and Yamamoto goes for another pin attempt. Honda bridges out and runs the ropes. Going for frankensteiner. Shizuku cartwheels out of it and runs the ropes. Honda dodges her and pushes her into the ropes on the opposite side. She sweeps the legs of Yamamoto and goes for a rushing shining wizard. It’s blocked and the challenger hits a spinning roundhouse kick, a variation of her Detonate kick. She goes for another pin attempt.
Hawke: Shizuku with the pin after that nasty kick!
Randy: One! Two! No!
Hawke: It’s going to take a whole lot more than this for either of them to stay down.
Shizuku picks up Momoko and throws her over the top ropes. Making her crash onto the apron. She gets on the apron herself and tries to lift her up. Honda fights back though. Grabbing the ropes and styling low. She kicks Yamamoto in the gut before trying something of her own. She kicks her again before getting back in the ring and running the ropes. Going for a strike of some sort, it wouldn’t matter though, because Shizuku would grab her and drive her spin first into the apron. Shizuku would get into the ring now, running the ropes, Momoko would get back up and would be met with a running axe handle through the ropes!
Randy: REALITY SHIFT!
Hawke: That’s gotta be it!
Shizuku with the quick pin. The ref slides out and counts.
ONE!
TWO!!
THR-
Hawke: NO MOMOKO KICKS OUT!
Randy: That was a really close call for the champ. She’s rocked after that one.
Momoko quickly gets up to her knees, swinging at her challenger. Trying to get off her back and make some space to recover. She knees her and throws her into the ring apron. She then throws Yamamoto onto the announcers table.
Hawke: Oh no! They’re taking the action right to us Randy!
Randy: Why can’t they take it to the bears announce table?
Hawke: Anywhere but he-
Randy: Oh no! Momoko with a powebomb through the table!
Hawke: BAH GAWD SHE’S GOTTA BE DEAD!
A pin from Honda and…
ONE!
TWO!!
THRE-
NO A KICK OUT!!!!!!
Yamamoto showing she’s tougher than she looks. Kicking out and fighting out of the debris. She’d use a piece of table to jab it into the forehead of Momoko, causing the champ to daun the crimson mask. The two fight over the barricade and into the crowd now. Shizuku grabbing a chair and throwing it at the champion. Honda chasing her as blood gushes out of her head. She grabs two chairs, throwing it towards Yamamoto, hitting her in the leg with it. She runs towards her and smashes the chair right across her head. The chair explodes as she goes for another pin attempt.
ONE!
TWO!!
THRE-
No a kick out. Momoko stomps her some more before picking her up and dragging her up the stairs. Smashing her head on the rail on occasion. Shizuku strikes back and drives her back onto the railing. Honda falls and rolls down a few stairs. They fight back up them and into the concession stands. Shizuku whips Momoko into the wall, she runs up it and bounces off with a jumping roundhouse kick. Yamamoto is taken aback, but charges back with a lariat. She picks up Momoko and smashes her head into the fountain machine. She then tries to drown her with coke products. It starts to work for a brief moment, but Momoko kicks her and manages to grab a cup, smashing it in her face. This causes enough of a distraction for Momoko to make some space. She grabs a frying pan and throws it into the face of Shizuku. She drops like a dead horse as momoko leaps for the cover.
ONE!
TWO!!
THREE-
NO! KICK OUT!!!!!
The two keep on fighting around the concession area. Fighting now to the merch tables. We see all sorts of things, from dvds to t-shirts. Even action figures and video games. Momoko grabs a giant “Best of Night of Champions” laser disc and throws it at Shizuku. She catches it and charges her with it. The champ blocks it with a handy dandy Mongo bobble head. Shizuku will get the upper hand though, slamming her through the table with all of the super sake lay.
Randy: NOOOOOOO! NOT THE SUPER SAKE!
Hawke: Are you ok man?
Randy: The Super Sake… it’s… it’s….
Hawke: Well er…. Excuse my partner here. Lets continue on with the match!
Shizuku with a pin attempt and a kick out. She grabs her and drags her towards the bathrooms. Throwing her into the room. She goes tumbling as Shizuku knees her, grabbing her again and slamming her face into the sink counter. Momoko elbows her and smashes her face into the mirror. She stars bleeding now. Momoko throws her into the stall, she fights back though, kicking the door in the champs face. Momoko gets knocked back, and gets slammed into a wall. She’s picked up and piledriven into the toilet by Yamamoto. She goes for the pin attempt.
ONE!
TWO!!
THREE?
Randy: Oh new champ!
Hawke: Hold on now Randy, not so fast! Momoko kicked out!
Momoko with blood covering her whole front now, screams as she kicks out and fights back. The two fight out of this stall and go back towards the sinks. Momoko grabs a trash can and throws it towards her. Luckily she dodges out of the way and hits Momoko with a kick. She goes for a forearm but it’s blocked. Momoko goes for the Tidal Wave. a cover and…
Hawke: One! Two!! Three!!!
Randy: No a kick out again!!!
Momoko opens up another stall, inside the toilet a large turd floating around in the bowl. Right now she’s desperate and you know what they say about desperate times. She grabs Shizukus head and drags her towards the toilet bowl with the turd in it. She tries to shove her face into it, but Shizuku fights back and breaks free. She grabs Honda and does the same to her. The two fight back and forth, Honda close now to the smelly turd. Her blood soaked body helps her escape. She slips under Yamamotos legs and shoves her forward. She lunges over and Honda gets her opponents face really really close to the turd. Momoko pushes harder and harder. Nowhere to go Shizuku is forced to tap out.
Randy: Wow she escaped a real shitty situation right there!
Bonnie Jenkins: The winner of this match and THE FINAL XHF WOMEN’S CHAMPION! MOMOKO HONDA!
Hawke: We have seen, and will see, a lot of great match-ups this evening – but nothing features the level of bad blood that our next title match promises.
Randy: Definitely a good one to send the kids out of the room for, except that one of the participants will only appeal to children.
Hawke: At End of Days 2021, XHF Phoenix champion Redmond Fury was eaten by the GUNS bear UrsusLa. Four months later, the XHF Gobbledygooker emerged from the animal during their Leap Year Special as the new champ.
Randy: Byrd having the belt should be physically impossible. I mean - have you seen Fury?
Hawke: A lot of questions remain about the enigmatic Dirty Byrd. In the subsequent five months, Redmond Fury also returned to the land of the living – out for revenge.
Randy: Gotta give Byrd credit though, he’s managed to avoid a rematch at every turn.
Hawke: But tonight... Night of Champions, Byrd has no more excuses, and no place left to hide. Let’s throw it over to Bonnie for the introductions.
The camera cuts to the ring, where Bonnie Jenkins smiles for a close-up before turning to the entranceway.
Bonnie Jenkins: The following contest is scheduled for one fall, and is for the XHF PHOENIX CHAMPIONSHIP!!!!!!
Crowd: AN ACTUAL GRUDGE MATCH POP!
Bonnie Jenkins: Entering first, the challenger, he stands at 6’3”, weighs in at 275lbs, and comes to us from Akron, Ohio...
The Longest reigning Phoenix champion of all time...Mister GUNS himself...That Buckeye Bruiser...REEEEEEEEEEEDMOND FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURY!!
The familiar notes of Gut Feeling act as a siren's call, beckoning the audience to crowd around the aisle, before the mad lyrical flow of Devo cue up the pyro. White sparks explode across the entrance curtain. Stepping out of the back, Redmond Fury realizes that the Dirty Byrd has continued to bribe the production team to swap out Whatta Man for his inside a bear theme song. The wall of muscle shudders with memories of literal walls of muscles, before willing a big smile for his fans. Moving with the tune, Fury slaps hands, signs autographs, busts moves, all while taking the time to flex for the camera.
Hawke: Fury captured the Phoenix title from Greg Adkins at last year’s Night of Champions, becoming the last AWF wrestler to hold the title before taking it to GUNS. One year later, can he pull it off again?
Randy: Looking at the difference in sizes, it’d be hard to see any other outcome.
As Fury waits patiently in the ring, Jenkins again turns to the entrance...
Bonnie Jenkins: And his opponent... standing at 5’9” and weighing in at 259lbs, he hails from the Thanksgiving memories of dysfunctional families everywhere. Please give a warm round of applause for the reigning Phoenix champion, THE XHF GOBBLEDYGOOKER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The lights dim as “The Bird” by Morris Day and the Time pumps over the PA system.
Hawke: ...
Randy: ...
Hawke: ...
Randy: He seems to be dragging his heels.
Hawke: Still no sign of the champion.
Dirty Byrd misses his entrance cue, normally running out in time to parrot Day’s pterodactyl call. After a few too many verses play over the PA system, the lights come up, and Jenkins tries to reassert her dominance.
Bonnie Jenkins: GIVE IT UP FOR THE GOBBLEDYGOOKER!!!!
The lights dim again as “The Bird” by Morris Day and the Time once again pumps over the PA system to the appearance of no one.
Bonnie Jenkins: Entering now... the Dirty Byrd?
Nothing. The normally amiable Fury stares daggers at the entrance curtains.
BUMP
There is an audible pop as grainy footage begins to play over the tron. The images are almost pitch black, but what looks like a hand pulls itself through a puddle. Suddenly an organic pink light reflects off a metallic object. The PCW Primetime championship? The missing piece of the X*Crown proves some illumination, as a severed robotic arm moves across a dank surface dragging the belt behind it like a tail. The camera continues to move awkwardly until coming across another championship belt, the Phoenix title. Getting slightly shakier, the image pans up, just in time for a profile of Dirty Byrd. For all the darkness, there are unnatural electrical charges running upwards, these brief flickers illuminate a slimy pink wall.
Dirty Byrd (on tron): Sorry I couldn’t be there tonight, Red. See the more I thought about our misunderstanding, our friendship, our match... the more homesick I got.
Fury breaks into a cold sweat.
Dirty Byrd: So I decided to return to the place where it all started...
Bonnie Jenkins: If you don’t appear for this contest, you will forfeit the title!
Dirty Byrd: Now... you can strip me, give me a ten count to get to the ring, just hand the damn thing to Fury if you want. No feathers off my tail. Red, you put a lot of time into making the title lineage credible, so that’s entirely your call. Makes no difference to me. Hell, you’d still have to COME TO ME, if you wanted the actual belt. All I’m saying is, Red, if you want to be the Phoenix? Or to settle our disagreement? ...You know where I am.
Dirty Byrd is inside a bear.
XHF Phoenix Championship
Singles Match
Dirty Byrd (c) vs Redmond Fury
The image cuts out on the tron, leaving the audience to boo this mean spirited bait and switch.
Bonnie Jenkins: Let’s get the referee in here for a ten co-
Before Jenkins can effectively save this segment, Redmond Fury is out of the ring. The Buckeye Bruiser looks like he’s going to be sick, but as he storms down the isle, it seems he may murder someone first.
Hawke: SO WAIT, Byrd fed himself to UrsusLa just to get out of defending the title?
Randy: That certainly sounds like something he’d do.
Hawke: The audience is rightfully disappointed, I know I am, and Fury is on a rampage.
Randy: You don’t think he’d feed himself to a bear too just to track Byrd down?
Hawke: Don’t be ridiculous!
Randy: He looks pretty determined.
Hawke: People don’t survive being eaten by wild animals, let alone twice!
A video package starts to play. The three wrestlers for the WUK World championship are shown, just before a voice is heard over the video package.
Havok: So let's take a few moments to see how we got to this point. First we would have to go right back to the first WUK show. A six man mini tournament was arranged to crown the first ever WUK World champion.
Video footage starts to play from WUK Legacy.
Havok: We saw Billy Fowler advance after beating Xiaolong.
Footage is seen of Fowler hitting a devastating spinebuster to Xiaolong, before covering for the three count.
Havok: Then Eddie D advanced.after Donzig was disqualified.
Footage is shown of Donzig attacking Eddie D with a steel chair, before being disqualified.
Havok: Then we saw myself take on Ronnie Long to finally advance.
Footage is shown of Havok hitting the Fall of Havok for the three count.
Havok: The next show saw a triple threat match for the World championship. Pitting myself against Eddie and Billy Fowler.
Footage is seen of Fowler hitting the London Calling on Eddie D and making the pin, with Havok trying to break up the pinfall.
Havok: Unfortunately the match didn't go in my favor as Fowler managed to pinned Eddie D to become the first ever WUK World champion. Earlier that same show, DOminic Morrisey faced off with Zolothatch to determine the number one contender for the World title.
Footage is seen of Morrisey hitting the Infinity Driver II and making the three count for the win.
Havok: So show three, saw Billy Fowler defending his title against the number one contender Domininc Morrisey.”
Footage is shown of Fowler and Morrisey during the championship match.
Havok: Where was I on this show, that's right I wasn't even booked. So what did I do?
Footage is shown of Havok running down to the ring. Punching Fowler in the face with a chain wrapped first bursting his nose open before attacking Morrisey.
Havok: I came down during the match, to make a point that I should have been in this match instead of some lucky punk. Then Fowler challenged me two a championship match also involving Morrisey. Before that match I would have to face Frank Windsor, who was looking to soften me up for his partner.
Footage is shown, with Havok taking on Windsor.
Havok: That didn't go too well, Frank ended up injuring his arm on his way to the overheated show.
Footage is played as Havok places a chair onto Frank's arm before landing a leg drop on top of it, injuring the arm.
Havok: So this brings us to the triple threat match here tonight. You will see Dominic Morrsey looking to extract some payback for the beat down that I gave him. Hoping to stand a chance of walking out as the new World champion.
The footage focuses on Morrisey briefly.
Havok: Billy Fowler, will be looking to retain his championship and teach me that I don't deserve to be in the World title picture.
Suddenly the footage changes over to the World Champion Billy Fowler.
Havok: Myself, I will be looking to fulfill my destiny by winning the World championship, proving that I deserve to be in the title picture and that I should of had a one on one match at the third show for the World title and I wasn't actually beat in the triple threat match to crown the first ever World champion.
Suddenly the footage focuses on Havok before the feed dies.
