Post by Rage (aka NoMercyMaster2001) on Aug 31, 2017 9:04:05 GMT -5
All The Small Things by Blink 182 plays as Minibadboy makes his way down to the ring on his motor scooter and with his tradition half gallon of milk in hand and starts sucking it down like crazy at the top of the ramp as the crowd goes nuts. Minibadboy wheelies down the ramp on scooter and then slides into the ring. Calling for more half gallons of milk from he ringside announcer and suck the down like crazy also, while the crowd goes nuts for one last time.
Carlos: Welcome to Pyro everybody! Wow, what a way to start off with a...scooter rider.
Ishnari: Boom, boom, boom! XHF Pyro! Scooters!
The lights go out. Suddenly, "Creeping Death" by Metallica starts to play throughout the arena. The XtremeTron then flashes white with a black dragon's silhouette on screen. The lights then come back on as Shadow Dragon comes out wearing a long black trench coat. He climbs into the ring, takes off his coat and stretches as he waits for the match to begin.
Carlos: Here is THE MAN of the Junior Heavyweight division, facing Platinum and a partner of his choosing. Should be another good match for Dragon.
Ishnari: He puts the effort in every time. You can't help but think that Shadow Dragon is unbeatable at this point but he has to fall at some stage.
The lights go to a dim as the voice of 50 Cent can be heard over the speakers.
If I can't do well, homey, it can't be done
Now I'ma let the champagne bottle pop
I'ma take it to the top
Fo sho I'ma make it hot, baby (baby)
With that pyro explosions go off at opposite ends of the ramp and "If I Can't" by 50 Cent hits the speakers. As the pyro leans over on the ramp, through the smoke walks Platinum. He stands just in front of the action where he looks down at his waist. He jumps up and down a moment before charging off towards the ring. He surprises everyone when he stops dead his tracks before entering the ring. He showcases his platinum necklace with the p around and it takes it off, pointing towards the entranceway.
Carlos: Here's the moment of truth...whos Platinum's partner?
Ishnari: It sure as fuck aint gonna be me.
What seems to be some slow square dance music begins playing in the background. Suddenly a loud yet cheery voice is heard over the speakers. "People!! It feels sooo good to be baaack!" Suddenly Decoy burst through the curtain and stands on the top of the ramp, with his arms spread out as if presenting himself to the fans. They rush to their feet with cheers for the return of Decoy as "Square Dance" by Eminem is playing in the background. Decoy holds one finger out to the crowd as if telling them one minute. He goes behind the curtain and comes back out wearing a bright blue Toronto Blue Jays baseball cap backwards on his head. His arms are crossed and a smile across his face. He walks down the ramp and joins Platinum at the bottom of the ramp, boos break out realizing Decoy has joined Platinum and Congo Corp. Decoy takes his cap off and Platinum removes his chain as they slide into the ring.
Carlos: Decoy!? Wow! What a surprise!
Ishnari: Anybody can tell an idiot what to do. I'm surprised I didn't beat him to the idea.
Platinum and Decoy vs. Shadow Dragon and Minibadboy
Platinum tells Decoy he's got this one as Decoy goes to the ring apron. MBB and Shadow Dragon decide that MBB will start. Platinum gives a tug to the top rope and leans back as he moves forward towards the middle of the ring. The two move in for a grapple, Platinum quick to sneak around the back of MBB to the wristlock. MBB tries throwing an elbow to the back of the head of Platinum but Platinum ducks under and with his speed is able to place his foot over the arm of MBB as though he was stepping over, flips around in a 360, dragging MBB down with him, and twisting the arm around as well. MBB falls on his back from the move; Platinum falls on him with a leg drop to the arm, and still has a hold of the arm. The move was done nice and quick, tremendous impact to the arm of MBB, as Platinum pulls out a page from MBB's book, combining the speed and agility with a bit of a technical approach.
Ishnari: Platinum starting with a flash-ass takedown, being himself an ass with a flash personality.
Carlos: Rimshot!
MBB, hanging on to the pain for a short while before being able to use the strength of his other arm to remove the pressure and flips up to his feet. Platinum does the same and moves in towards MBB who takes him down with an arm drag/toss. Platinum to his feet and he catches a nicely executed dropkick from MBB, forcing him back into the corner. MBB charges, looking for the monkey toss but Platinum is able to hold on. He takes a few steps out of the corner and with a shove, knocks MBB onto his back. He grabs the feet of MBB looking to launch him and he does. MBB goes towards the corner but is able to balance himself on the turnbuckle, leap off, spinning around in mid air and taking Platinum down with cross body. Platinum however, rolls through and both men are quick to their feet, both men stand there looking out towards the other, we're back to square one and the crowd is right into it, cheering both men on after the impressive display.
Carlos: The crowd just loves this action, as do we.
Ishnari: But where has it got them? They're standing there as fit as when they stepped into the ring.
The two stand across from one another looking ready to go when Platinum suddenly stands straight up. MBB takes a step back as well, wondering what he's doing. Platinum points to Shadow Dragon and claps his hands as though telling the crowd that he's told MBB, he wants Shadow Dragon in. Not taking anything away from MBB, the crowd gives their cheerful response. MBB turns around and goes to tag in Shadow Dragon when Platinum strikes with a cheap shot, a drop kick to the back of the head of MBB. MBB is sent into Shadow Dragon, the referee clapping his hands motioning the tag was made as Platinum begins to put the boots to MBB. Shadow Dragon leans back, pulling on the top rope; the fans begin to cheer, knowing his about to fly. Shadow Dragon launches himself over the top, grabbing the head of Platinum, turning him around in the process and driving him to the mat with a bulldog! He rolls him over into a quick cover but Platinum kicks out after one. Shadow Dragon runs into the far ropes as Platinum lay on the floor. Shadow Dragon leaps over Platinum and continues into the other ropes. He comes back and Platinum leaps into the air, spreading his legs as Shadow Dragon goes to run under. Platinum however, wraps his legs around the waist of Shadow Dragon, his feet coming together at the stomach area as he pulls him back with his own momentum right into a roll up. Shadow Dragon feeling the whiplash effect but still manages to kick out after the count of two. Platinum rolls back, both men to their feet and Platinum moves to the side, making the tag to Decoy. Decoy steps in through the ropes and immediately gets the dropkick to the head from Shadow Dragon, knocking him right back through the ropes and to the outside. Shadow Dragon runs to the far ropes, you know what's coming next. Shadow Dragon goes to leap over the top and to the outside onto Decoy but once in the air and directly over the top rope, Platinum leaps onto the second rope and springboards towards Shadow Dragon, connecting with a Japanese type kick to the head of Shadow Dragon. Platinum lands on his feet, stumbles to the ground, but did land on his feet on the outside. Shadow Dragon however, is a different story. He falls back in mid air and when he hits the ground, ends up hitting the back of his head hard on the mat on the outside.
Carlos: That could end someones career. That padding hurts more than one would think.
Decoy picks up Shadow Dragon as Platinum climbs to his feet as well but all three men find themselves turning to see MBB spring boarding over the top and to the outside, taking all three men down with a cross body! MBB feeling the affects of that move as well, he remains down with the other three. Decoy is the first up as MBB and Platinum are also beginning to stir; Shadow Dragon remains down, still feeling the affects of that kick from Platinum earlier. MBB grabs Platinum and goes to whip him into the steel steps but Platinum reverses as Decoy steps in front of the steps. MBB is sent in towards Decoy who goes to toss MBB over his head but MBB pushes off and connects with a dropkick to Decoy, sending him stumbling back and tripping over the steps. Platinum connects with a superkick to the chops of MBB as he turned around and as Platinum turns, Shadow Dragon is up and is on the apron, leaping onto the second rope and Asai Moonsault to Platinum!
Carlos: You would think by now, Shadow Dragon would have eventually killed somebody with his aerial attacks.
Ishnari: Not to mention himself.
Decoy is up to his feet and comes around the corner, grabbing Shadow Dragon by the back of the mask and tries to turn him around. Shadow Dragon has other things in mind, leaning back, and spitting the mist into the eyes of Decoy! Decoy stumbles back, blindsided now and from the top rope turnbuckle, MBB flies to the outside and takes down Decoy with a spinning wheel kick type move. Meanwhile around the other side of the ring, Platinum is running across the apron, flips off with a 360 and takes down Shadow Dragon! All four men down momentarily when MBB flips to his feet and on the other side of the ring, Platinum flips to his, Decoy and Shadow Dragon remain down. MBB picks up Decoy and rolls him into the ring; these two are the legal men. MBB is stalking Decoy, calling for a Bad Boy Slam! Platinum sees it and is climbing to the top. Decoy is to his feet and MBB is moving in for it but Decoy sees Platinum and ducks down as Platinum takes out MBB with a corkscrew body attack, the Perfection! MBB is staggering back to his feet as Decoy picks him up onto his shoulders in the fireman's carry position, is it time for the Immovable? Decoy begins to turn him over when Shadow Dragon pulls MBB down. MBB lay on the mat as Decoy kicks Shadow Dragon in the gut and picks him up for a powerbomb but Shadow Dragon turns it into a hurricanrana! Decoy is able to bounce back to his feet but stumbles into the ropes. The camera pans over to see Platinum was perched on the top and he loses his balance and falls to a straddling position on the top turnbuckle! Shadow Dragon points to him and charges towards him. He leaps onto the top rope beside him and bounces back towards Platinum, hurricanrana from the top! Shadow Dragon into the cover as MBB charges Decoy. Decoy bends over and tosses MBB over the top rope and to the outside, 1...2...Decoy dives forward and makes the save!
Carlos: So close yet so far, as Decoy is right there to make the save.
Ishnari: That's exactly what you would expect. These two have a strong tagging history and an undeniable chemistry.
Platinum is pulling himself to his feet with the far turnbuckle while Decoy is slowly picking up Shadow Dragon. Shadow Dragon tries to use his speed and go one up on Decoy with an Irish Whip, but Decoy reverses. Platinum now steps onto the top as Decoy pick up Shadow Dragon for a spine buster but holds on as Platinum comes off the top for a clothesline/bull dog type move and both connect at the same time! Decoy falls on him for the cover 1...2...MBB crawling into the ring but it's too late three!
Winners: Decoy and Platinum
Carlos: Decoy gets the win for his team!
Ishnari: I told you! Shadow Dragon is not invincible. All these matches make him look great until they start to take their toll.
Decoy and Platinum raise their hands in victory before sliding out of the ring and beginning to retreat to the back as MBB slides back into the ring. He is helping Shadow Dragon back up as Decoy and Platinum raise their hands in victory on the top of the stage.
Carlos: Thats a image that I thought Id never see again.
Ishnari: Manipulation of idiots. He should stick to hating them like me, but self-loathing never did a guy any good.
*Awake by Godsmack plays over the speakers. Mr. X comes out of the curtains with his arms crossed like an X in front of his face. He then slowly separates his arms, but picks up speed until they fully extend. He then walks to the ring, climbs up the apron, and walks over the top rope. He then tightens his gloves and cracks his knuckles as he waits for the match to begin.*
Carlos: Mr. X has been going crazy without his Hardcore title with him, and Kurt Angle is the man he wants.
*"Medal" begins to play throughout the arena and the crowd chants "You Suck" along with the song as Kurt Angle makes his way onto the ramp with the XHF Hardcore championship around his waist. He stands almost frozen at the top of the ramp before throwing his arms up with his index fingers pointed towards the sky igniting red, white, and blue pyro from the ground into the air in an array of color. Kurt makes his way down the ramp, still with the same mixed reactions... he climbs into the ring and does his signature twirl and then takes off his medals and begins to warm up in the corner of the ring as his music dies out.*
Carlos: Im amazed that Angle went after the Hardcore title, I mean with the abilities this man processes one would think he would go for bigger gold.
XHF Hardcore Championship Match
Mr. X vs. Kurt Angle
*Angle starts with a charging forearm. X is up and they grapple. It is even for a while until X starts to push Angle back to the corner and then sends knee strikes to the gut. He grabs Angle by the throat but Angle floats over and locks in a waist lock and goes for a German Suplex. X grabs the ropes and holds. He sends a low blow to Angle and turns and hits a hard right hand. Angle rolls to his feet and they trade right hands until X grabs his throat and hurls him across the ring. X picks him up and hooks in a torture rack. Angle floats over and off to the floor. X turns and receives a guillotine drop. X rolls out of the ring. Angle hooks him and whips him into the ring steps shoulder first. He holds on and goes again into the barricade. He moves over and whips him into the ring post.*
*Angle lets out a signature WHOO! and grabs a kendo stick from under the ring. He swings but X falls over to the floor and the stick snaps on the post. Angle growls and goes to the timekeeper. He grabs the steel chair from under him as well as a medal. He hangs the medal inside his outfit but around his neck. He goes to X but gets a big boot to the head. Angle drops the chair and rolls to one knee. X grabs the chair as Angle stands and pulls out the medal. X swings but Angle ducks and spins him and sends a punch with the medal to X and X falls over busted open. Angle goes to pick him up but X hits a low blow and powerbombs him through the announcers table. Both men are down. After a few seconds X pins. 1 . . . 2 kick out. X picks up Angle but Angle hits a belly-to-belly over the barricade into the stands. They start trading punches to the backstage area. At the entrance they stop and X goes for a big boot but Angle reverses and rolls him into the steps.*
Carlos: Steel plus bodies isnt a good combination last time I checked.
*Angle laughs and starts punching X. Out of nowhere a fan comes and cracks a beer bottle over the head of Angle and he collapses. Both men are out.*
Carlos: What the hell was that!?
*After a few minutes X is up and surprised. He takes Angle into the hallway and starts punching his head against the walls. In the background is an odd scene. Smoke is billowing from under the locker room doors of both men. Neither notices. X goes to his room to get a weapon and opens the door and his jaw drops. His room is burnt to ashes. He goes to Kurts with the same result. Kurt is up and has a trash can lid from another room. He cracks it over Xs skull.*
Carlos: Talk about a headache.
*Angle locks in an Ankle Lock. X screams and fights it. He refuses to tap. After a few seconds Angle begins to really twist but X flips him into a door and Angle collapses. They head to the lobby via X dragging Angle. X punches him a few times before grabbing a sledgehammer. He swings but Angle ducks. He kicks him and hits a DDT. He grabs the sledge and waits for X. Mr. X stands right into a shot between the eyes. Angle locks in a leg lock. X wont give up. He grabs the sledgehammer but Kurt sees and dodges letting X hit his own leg. Kurt grabs a trashcan and sets it behind him. He picks up X and hits an Angle Slam onto it crushing it. 1 . . . 2 . . . 3!*
Winner and still XHF Hardcore Champion: Kurt Angle
Carlos: Kurt Angle retains his Hardcore Championship!
*X is barely moving. Kurt stands up when out of nowhere the fan from before comes out with a flaming 2x4 wrapped in barbed wire. Its Smash!*
Carlos: Wow, last time I saw Smash he was thrown off a scaffold by Death Trap.
*Kurt is up now and gets the 2x4 right into the spine. It sticks there and starts to burn the flesh. Kurt collapses. X is up and goes after Smash but Smash is fresh and easily dodges and hits a DDT. He brings X with him up a pile of boxes and sets for the tombstone off the top (The Wrecking Ball). He moves and hits the Wrecking Ball off the crates with Xs head landing on the barbed wire 2x4 on Angles back. Both men are stuck to it when EMTs arrive and free them and put out the fire. Smash just smiles and cackles holding the belt high pointing to Angle.*
Carlos: I guess he wants the Hardcore title.
"Man in a Box" hits the arena and Hardcore Harry and Slim Stevie Bone comes from behind the curtain and shows off by putting their hands in the air. Harry then points to the crowd to get them booing at him. Harry and SSB then head to the ring and goes right over the top rope. He gets in and goes to the ropes and raises his arms. When he does that he gets a loud burst of boos followed by Harry Sucks chants. He stands in the corner and waits for his opponent.
Carlos: Wow Mr. Ish, where were you the last match?
Ishnari: Wanking!
Carlos: Don't we all want to do that on TV...don't we all...
The beginning of Tourniquet by Marilyn Manson slowly echos through the arena, and green and blue lights fill the top of the ramp. After about 10 second the guitar kicks in, and The Xtreme Warrior jogs through the curtains, his clothes and body paint glowing in the light. He starts to jog and dance on the spot, touching the floor with his hands almost crawling, half the crowd cheering wildly to the entrance as the other half boo at his heelish attitude. The Xtreme Warrior then burst into a slow run, and makes his way down the ramp, slapping hands with some of the fans on the way down. Tourniquet by Marilyn Manson still playing loudly.
Take your hatred out on me
make your victim my head
you never ever believed in me
I am your tourniquet
The Xtreme Warrior quickly slides in the ring, where he jumps up a turnbuckle and brings his arms up in the air. He stays there for a couple of seconds, and then jumps down and runs to the turnbuckle on the opposite side of the ring, where he taunts the crowd again. He then jumps down, and starts to stretch at some ropes, and waits for the match to begin. "Come Out and Play (Gotta Keep 'em Separated)" by The Offspring plays and Lodi comes out with his signs that say... I love Ishnari! Lodi puts the signs on the floor and gives his sunglasses to a ring crew and awaits the bell.
Carlos: Mr. Ish, it seems like you have a fan.
Ishnari: He is but one of the mighty Ishnari army, a group of people that have fallen instantly in love with my wit and my wrestling brain.
XHF Tag Team Championship
Hardcore Harry and Slim Stevie Bone vs. The Xtreme Warrior and Lodi
*Slim Stevie Bone and Hardcore Harry talk strategy in their corner, as The Xtreme Warrior gets ready to start the match. Quickly, Harry is selected to start as the two lock up and the bell is rung, starting the match. Harry gets the advantage quickly and brings Warrior to one knee. He lets go of the hold and drops a double axe handle to Warrior's back. Harry runs back and hits the ropes, but Warrior quickly adjusts himself and sends Harry flying with a Monkey Flip!*
Carlos: That takes leg strength to flip a man that size across the ring.
Ishnari: Actually Carl, the Judo technique on which the monkey flip is based uses the momentum from the weight of the attacker falling to propel the opponent. Leg strength does not play that big a part.
*Warrior quickly snaps to his feet and grabs Harry by the arm, dragging him to his corner before he tags in his partner, Lodi. SSB attempts to enter the ring to stop this, but quickly the referee steps in between him as Lodi begins to climb to the top rope in his corner. Quickly though, Harry gets up and charges the corner, knocking Lodi down. Quickly though, Warrior gets back involved as he delivers a hard punch to Harry's jaw, almost knocking him down.*
Ishnari: Don't get me started on the referees around here.
*Lodi gets back up from the fall and begins to pound on Harry as Warrior exits the ring and the ref gets back involved in the match after calming SSB down. Lodi irish whips Harry, but it is reversed. On the comeback, Lodi quickly slides under Harry's legs but grabs them, bringing Harry down for a pin, 1... 2... Harry kicks out. Harry looks furious, but gets up quickly and hits the ropes, knocking Lodi down with a clothesline. Harry retreats to his corner and tags in his partner, SSB. SSB comes charging in and stomps on his opponent before he rushes to his opponents corner and knocks Warrior off of the apron. Quickly though Lodi jumps up and surprises SSB from behind german suplex! Harry charges the ring, but Lodi knocks him down and out of the ring with a dropkick. He sees that SSB is still down and decides to jump on the ropes, hitting a crossbody block! Lodi goes for the cover, 1... 2... 3!*
Winners and still XHF Tag Team Champions: Lodi and The Xtreme Warrior
Carlos: And Lodi and The Xtreme Warrior retain their titles.
Ishnari: Lodi with the crossbody block, an under apreciated move to keep the titles with him and Warrior for a little bit longer. Harry and SSB could be back for more though. I don't think they're going to give up soon.
*Suddenly the arena is plunged into total darkness and the begging of Marylin Manson This Is the New Shit hits the P.A. system. The Xtreme Tron goes from black to static and back to black, causing a strobe effect upon the crowd. When the music gets loud strobe lights explode the bright lights upon the crowd as the top of the entrance ramp begins glowing in a deep red. Slowly the curtain opens and Rat Bastard emerges. Rat makes his way down the ramp as the strobe lights ignite around him, making his walk look like slow motion. When he reaches the apron he climbs in as the dark red glow comes from above the ring now as Rat glares out at the fans*
Carlos: Rat Bastard is just so mean.
Ishnari: Ooh what a big meanie! SHUT UP CARL.
Carlos: He gave me a weedge the first day I came here! I hate that man for that.
Ishnari: I should do that to people I hate. Like you.
*The lights go completely out, many of the fans have lighters, lazer pens, etc and now have them on. Suddenly the screen turns on with a sea of static. The beginning of Burn to Burn by Static-X hits the speakers. The music takes a pause as nothing but a deep, slow voice is heard reciting the beginning of the song.*
"Static in sound...
Uncurable
You plant the seed...
You feel the need"
*A loud and booming scream is heard as pyro goes off at the top of the ramp, the ball of fire followed by the billowing smoke, first thing to be seen is the shiny XHF Title, and through it all, out walks Reeshi, revealing that very title over his shoulder. Reeshi is greeted with the boos from the fans, he takes it all in, ignoring every one of them with the exception of one where he stops along the side of the entranceway and taunts the fan. Once down the ramp Reeshi reaches the ring and slides under the bottom rope. He walks to the far side and climbs the turnbuckle, raising both arms, the XHF Title in one hand, into the air, showboating to hate filled fans. Reeshi steps down and stands in the middle of the ring, adjusting the title on his shoulder, giving it a pat here or there, letting everybody know that the title belongs to him.*
Carlos: But maybe the only man meaner than Ratthe XHF Champion.
Ishnari: Maybe next week we can have a Mega Meanie Match between Reeshi and Simon Cowell.
XHF World Heavyweight Championship
Rat Bastard vs. Reeshi
The two competitors stare at each other, as the bell rings. The two walk up to each other, but Rat Bastard being the cheater he is, takes a cheap shot with a knee to the stomach. Rat Bastard grabs the wrist of Reeshi and whips him into the ropes and goes for a clothesline, but Reeshi ducks and waits for Rat Bastard to turn around. When Rat does Reeshi lifts Rat up to his shoulders for the Oreeshinator, but Rat Bastard slides off and slams Reeshis arm down going for the Rat Trap! Reeshi refuses for the move to be locked in though, as he rolls out of the way. Reeshi rolls out of the ring and stands up and looks at Rat Bastard, as Rat Bastard is up to his feet taunting for Reeshi to get into the ring. Reeshi climbs up to the apron, and Rat Bastard once again takes a cheap shot as he runs to Reeshi, and knocks him off the apron with a kitchen sink. Reeshi hits the railing and Rat Bastard follows him, and sends fists into the face of Reeshi, each shot making Reeshi flinch. Rat Bastard grabs the head of Reeshi and bends him over, driving his knee into his face. Rat holds onto Reeshi and throws him into the side of the ring, Reeshi crashing into it with great impact. Reeshi is sitting against the ring holding his head, and Rat begins to stomp on his chest. The referee begins to shout at Rat Bastard to get into the ring, but Rat Bastard flips him off.
Carlos: Jeez, Rat just hates everybody doesnt he?
Ishnari: He loves the laydeez.
Rat Bastard is now laughing as he is lifting Reeshi up to his feet, and grabs him in a front facelock. Rat Bastard throws Reeshis arm behind his neck and grabs Reeshi by the tights, and lifts him up and drops him with a suplex onto the padding! Reeshi sits up and holds his back, as Rat Bastard climbs up to his feet. Rat sees Reeshi sitting up, so he grabs him by the head and lifts him up to his feet. Rat Bastard rolls Reeshi into the ring, and Rat Bastard makes the first cover of the match up. Reeshi kicks out before the count of three, keeping his XHF title in tact. Rat Bastard is on his knees and punches Reeshi in the face a couple of times, but then lifts him up to his feet. Rat Bastard places Reeshis arm onto his shoulder and grabs Reeshi trying to lift him up for a t-bone suplex, but Reeshi keeps his weight down and elbows Rat in the head. Reeshi finally releases Rat Bastard off of him and runs to the ropes going for a move, but Rat is able to recover and grabs Reeshi, and throws him with an overhead belly-to-belly suplex! Rat Bastard crawls over to Reeshi and hooks the leg, but Reeshi gets a shoulder up before the count of three. Rat sits Reeshi up and applies a sleeper hold, and pulls him back down to the mat, choking all the air out of the champion.
Carlos: Reeshi doesnt seem like his usual self. By now Reeshi usually has the upper hand on his opponent, but now it seems like Rat Bastard is dominating the match. Could we see a title change tonight?
Ishnari: I've always said it man - brains win matches. These two have lots of the stuff. Either could win it.
Reeshi grabs the arm of Rat Bastard and tries to get him to let go, but Rat Bastard refuses and uses all of his strength to keep the arm around Reeshis neck. Reeshi soon stops trying, as he is now almost unconscious. Rat Bastard begins to laugh, but then screams for the referee to ask if he quits. The referee asks Reeshi, but Reeshi shakes his head, not wanting to lose his championship. Suddenly the referee grabs Reeshis wrist and lifts it up in the air and then lets go, and it drops. The referee lifts Reeshis arm up once again and lets go, and it falls to the mat for the second time. The referee signals to the crowd that it needs to drop one more time for Rat Bastard to win the match, and he lifts Reeshis arm up in the air. The referee lets go, and Reeshis hand begins to fall to the mat, until he is able to keep it up in the air! Rat Bastard screams in disbelief, as Reeshi slowly begins to roll up to his feet. Reeshi is finally up to his feet, but Rat Bastard takes the champion by surprise, but slamming him down with a sleeper drop! Rat Bastard quickly covers Reeshi, but Reeshi just kicks out!
Carlos: Rat Bastard really wants this win, and he used a smart maneuver like that. Rat Bastard has been to the top before and loves the taste, so I think hes going to do stuff that he usually doesnt do so he can win the title back from the one who took it from him.
Ishnari: What sort of stuff doesn't Rat Bastard usually do? Give to charity? Celibacy?
Rat Bastard stands up with his hands on his hips thinking of what he could have done, but he comes to a conclusion. Rat Bastard walks to Reeshi and lifts him up and slams him down with a bodyslam, but then goes to the apron. Rat Bastard walks to the nearest turnbuckle and places his foot on the second turnbuckle, and spits at the crowd. The crowd immediately boos as Rat cockily smirks at the crowd, and then climbs all the way to the top. Rat spreads his arms and leaps off the top rope going for the Drop Of 1000 Bastards, but right before Rat can hit Reeshi moves out of the way! Rats face bounces off the mat, as Reeshi rolls to the nearest corner. Rat Bastard holds his face as he slowly climbs up to his feet, as Reeshi uses the ropes to get to his feet. Rat Bastard turns to Reeshi, who runs to him and lifts a boot up hitting him in the face! Rat Bastard falls to the mat and Reeshi falls on top of him and the referee starts the count, but Rat kicks out before the count of three!
Carlos: Rat has a face of steel, taking two shots to the face like that; any normal man would either have a broken nose or a concussion.
Ishnari: Plan B! Plan B!
Reeshi sits up in disgust that Rat Bastard kicked out, as he then stands up. Reeshi bends over and grabs Rat by the hair, but when the referee is not looking, Rat Bastard gives Reeshi a low blow! Reeshi falls to the mat holding his groin, as Rat Bastard stands up with another smile on his face. Reeshi is obviously in pain, as Rat grabs him by the ankle and drags him into the center of the ring. Rat Bastard covers Reeshi, 1-2-Reeshi just gets a shoulder up. Rat Bastard is irate with that, and he then climbs up to his feet and stomps on the champion, who rolls to his stomach. Rat grabs Reeshi by the hair and shouts something to the crowd, and slowly lifts Reeshi up in a bent over position. Reeshi is positioned between the legs of Rat Bastard, as Rat grabs Reeshis waist. Rat flips Reeshi onto his shoulders for a Bastard Bomb, but Reeshi begins punching Rat in the face! Rat Bastard wont release Reeshi though, and he slams him hard into the mat with a Bastard Bomb! Rat hooks the leg of Reeshi, 1-2-Reeshi kicks out once again!
Carlos: And Reeshi kicks out again!
Ishnari: Ah man the Bastard Bomb is such a harsh move. So difficult to kick out of. They're destroying each other.
Rat Bastard is xtremely upset by this, as he stands up and says something to a fan in the front row. The fan and Rat Bastard continue to exchange words with one another.
Carlos: What is Rat doing talking to the fan? He should be taking advantage of the situation.
Ishnari: We had something similar last show. The XHF installs passion in all of its fans and the performers have to deal with that.
Rat Bastard continues to argue with the fan, as Reeshi slowly climbs up to his feet. Reeshi is finally all the way to his feet, as the argument continues. Suddenly Rat Bastard is taken by surprise as Reeshi turns him around and lifts him onto his shoulders, and hits the Oreeshinator! Reeshi covers Rat and the referee makes the count, 1-2-3!
Winner and still XHF World Heavyweight Champion: Reeshi
Carlos: And Reeshi retains the XHF title, and shows why he is the best this company has to offer.
Ishnari: Nu-uh. It was just the golden rule. Idiocy cost Bastard the match. Idiocy won Reeshi the match. Idiocy is a powerful thing Carl, you need to harness it so that it is on your side.
Fade out.
Carlos: Welcome to Pyro everybody! Wow, what a way to start off with a...scooter rider.
Ishnari: Boom, boom, boom! XHF Pyro! Scooters!
The lights go out. Suddenly, "Creeping Death" by Metallica starts to play throughout the arena. The XtremeTron then flashes white with a black dragon's silhouette on screen. The lights then come back on as Shadow Dragon comes out wearing a long black trench coat. He climbs into the ring, takes off his coat and stretches as he waits for the match to begin.
Carlos: Here is THE MAN of the Junior Heavyweight division, facing Platinum and a partner of his choosing. Should be another good match for Dragon.
Ishnari: He puts the effort in every time. You can't help but think that Shadow Dragon is unbeatable at this point but he has to fall at some stage.
The lights go to a dim as the voice of 50 Cent can be heard over the speakers.
If I can't do well, homey, it can't be done
Now I'ma let the champagne bottle pop
I'ma take it to the top
Fo sho I'ma make it hot, baby (baby)
With that pyro explosions go off at opposite ends of the ramp and "If I Can't" by 50 Cent hits the speakers. As the pyro leans over on the ramp, through the smoke walks Platinum. He stands just in front of the action where he looks down at his waist. He jumps up and down a moment before charging off towards the ring. He surprises everyone when he stops dead his tracks before entering the ring. He showcases his platinum necklace with the p around and it takes it off, pointing towards the entranceway.
Carlos: Here's the moment of truth...whos Platinum's partner?
Ishnari: It sure as fuck aint gonna be me.
What seems to be some slow square dance music begins playing in the background. Suddenly a loud yet cheery voice is heard over the speakers. "People!! It feels sooo good to be baaack!" Suddenly Decoy burst through the curtain and stands on the top of the ramp, with his arms spread out as if presenting himself to the fans. They rush to their feet with cheers for the return of Decoy as "Square Dance" by Eminem is playing in the background. Decoy holds one finger out to the crowd as if telling them one minute. He goes behind the curtain and comes back out wearing a bright blue Toronto Blue Jays baseball cap backwards on his head. His arms are crossed and a smile across his face. He walks down the ramp and joins Platinum at the bottom of the ramp, boos break out realizing Decoy has joined Platinum and Congo Corp. Decoy takes his cap off and Platinum removes his chain as they slide into the ring.
Carlos: Decoy!? Wow! What a surprise!
Ishnari: Anybody can tell an idiot what to do. I'm surprised I didn't beat him to the idea.
Platinum and Decoy vs. Shadow Dragon and Minibadboy
Platinum tells Decoy he's got this one as Decoy goes to the ring apron. MBB and Shadow Dragon decide that MBB will start. Platinum gives a tug to the top rope and leans back as he moves forward towards the middle of the ring. The two move in for a grapple, Platinum quick to sneak around the back of MBB to the wristlock. MBB tries throwing an elbow to the back of the head of Platinum but Platinum ducks under and with his speed is able to place his foot over the arm of MBB as though he was stepping over, flips around in a 360, dragging MBB down with him, and twisting the arm around as well. MBB falls on his back from the move; Platinum falls on him with a leg drop to the arm, and still has a hold of the arm. The move was done nice and quick, tremendous impact to the arm of MBB, as Platinum pulls out a page from MBB's book, combining the speed and agility with a bit of a technical approach.
Ishnari: Platinum starting with a flash-ass takedown, being himself an ass with a flash personality.
Carlos: Rimshot!
MBB, hanging on to the pain for a short while before being able to use the strength of his other arm to remove the pressure and flips up to his feet. Platinum does the same and moves in towards MBB who takes him down with an arm drag/toss. Platinum to his feet and he catches a nicely executed dropkick from MBB, forcing him back into the corner. MBB charges, looking for the monkey toss but Platinum is able to hold on. He takes a few steps out of the corner and with a shove, knocks MBB onto his back. He grabs the feet of MBB looking to launch him and he does. MBB goes towards the corner but is able to balance himself on the turnbuckle, leap off, spinning around in mid air and taking Platinum down with cross body. Platinum however, rolls through and both men are quick to their feet, both men stand there looking out towards the other, we're back to square one and the crowd is right into it, cheering both men on after the impressive display.
Carlos: The crowd just loves this action, as do we.
Ishnari: But where has it got them? They're standing there as fit as when they stepped into the ring.
The two stand across from one another looking ready to go when Platinum suddenly stands straight up. MBB takes a step back as well, wondering what he's doing. Platinum points to Shadow Dragon and claps his hands as though telling the crowd that he's told MBB, he wants Shadow Dragon in. Not taking anything away from MBB, the crowd gives their cheerful response. MBB turns around and goes to tag in Shadow Dragon when Platinum strikes with a cheap shot, a drop kick to the back of the head of MBB. MBB is sent into Shadow Dragon, the referee clapping his hands motioning the tag was made as Platinum begins to put the boots to MBB. Shadow Dragon leans back, pulling on the top rope; the fans begin to cheer, knowing his about to fly. Shadow Dragon launches himself over the top, grabbing the head of Platinum, turning him around in the process and driving him to the mat with a bulldog! He rolls him over into a quick cover but Platinum kicks out after one. Shadow Dragon runs into the far ropes as Platinum lay on the floor. Shadow Dragon leaps over Platinum and continues into the other ropes. He comes back and Platinum leaps into the air, spreading his legs as Shadow Dragon goes to run under. Platinum however, wraps his legs around the waist of Shadow Dragon, his feet coming together at the stomach area as he pulls him back with his own momentum right into a roll up. Shadow Dragon feeling the whiplash effect but still manages to kick out after the count of two. Platinum rolls back, both men to their feet and Platinum moves to the side, making the tag to Decoy. Decoy steps in through the ropes and immediately gets the dropkick to the head from Shadow Dragon, knocking him right back through the ropes and to the outside. Shadow Dragon runs to the far ropes, you know what's coming next. Shadow Dragon goes to leap over the top and to the outside onto Decoy but once in the air and directly over the top rope, Platinum leaps onto the second rope and springboards towards Shadow Dragon, connecting with a Japanese type kick to the head of Shadow Dragon. Platinum lands on his feet, stumbles to the ground, but did land on his feet on the outside. Shadow Dragon however, is a different story. He falls back in mid air and when he hits the ground, ends up hitting the back of his head hard on the mat on the outside.
Carlos: That could end someones career. That padding hurts more than one would think.
Decoy picks up Shadow Dragon as Platinum climbs to his feet as well but all three men find themselves turning to see MBB spring boarding over the top and to the outside, taking all three men down with a cross body! MBB feeling the affects of that move as well, he remains down with the other three. Decoy is the first up as MBB and Platinum are also beginning to stir; Shadow Dragon remains down, still feeling the affects of that kick from Platinum earlier. MBB grabs Platinum and goes to whip him into the steel steps but Platinum reverses as Decoy steps in front of the steps. MBB is sent in towards Decoy who goes to toss MBB over his head but MBB pushes off and connects with a dropkick to Decoy, sending him stumbling back and tripping over the steps. Platinum connects with a superkick to the chops of MBB as he turned around and as Platinum turns, Shadow Dragon is up and is on the apron, leaping onto the second rope and Asai Moonsault to Platinum!
Carlos: You would think by now, Shadow Dragon would have eventually killed somebody with his aerial attacks.
Ishnari: Not to mention himself.
Decoy is up to his feet and comes around the corner, grabbing Shadow Dragon by the back of the mask and tries to turn him around. Shadow Dragon has other things in mind, leaning back, and spitting the mist into the eyes of Decoy! Decoy stumbles back, blindsided now and from the top rope turnbuckle, MBB flies to the outside and takes down Decoy with a spinning wheel kick type move. Meanwhile around the other side of the ring, Platinum is running across the apron, flips off with a 360 and takes down Shadow Dragon! All four men down momentarily when MBB flips to his feet and on the other side of the ring, Platinum flips to his, Decoy and Shadow Dragon remain down. MBB picks up Decoy and rolls him into the ring; these two are the legal men. MBB is stalking Decoy, calling for a Bad Boy Slam! Platinum sees it and is climbing to the top. Decoy is to his feet and MBB is moving in for it but Decoy sees Platinum and ducks down as Platinum takes out MBB with a corkscrew body attack, the Perfection! MBB is staggering back to his feet as Decoy picks him up onto his shoulders in the fireman's carry position, is it time for the Immovable? Decoy begins to turn him over when Shadow Dragon pulls MBB down. MBB lay on the mat as Decoy kicks Shadow Dragon in the gut and picks him up for a powerbomb but Shadow Dragon turns it into a hurricanrana! Decoy is able to bounce back to his feet but stumbles into the ropes. The camera pans over to see Platinum was perched on the top and he loses his balance and falls to a straddling position on the top turnbuckle! Shadow Dragon points to him and charges towards him. He leaps onto the top rope beside him and bounces back towards Platinum, hurricanrana from the top! Shadow Dragon into the cover as MBB charges Decoy. Decoy bends over and tosses MBB over the top rope and to the outside, 1...2...Decoy dives forward and makes the save!
Carlos: So close yet so far, as Decoy is right there to make the save.
Ishnari: That's exactly what you would expect. These two have a strong tagging history and an undeniable chemistry.
Platinum is pulling himself to his feet with the far turnbuckle while Decoy is slowly picking up Shadow Dragon. Shadow Dragon tries to use his speed and go one up on Decoy with an Irish Whip, but Decoy reverses. Platinum now steps onto the top as Decoy pick up Shadow Dragon for a spine buster but holds on as Platinum comes off the top for a clothesline/bull dog type move and both connect at the same time! Decoy falls on him for the cover 1...2...MBB crawling into the ring but it's too late three!
Winners: Decoy and Platinum
Carlos: Decoy gets the win for his team!
Ishnari: I told you! Shadow Dragon is not invincible. All these matches make him look great until they start to take their toll.
Decoy and Platinum raise their hands in victory before sliding out of the ring and beginning to retreat to the back as MBB slides back into the ring. He is helping Shadow Dragon back up as Decoy and Platinum raise their hands in victory on the top of the stage.
Carlos: Thats a image that I thought Id never see again.
Ishnari: Manipulation of idiots. He should stick to hating them like me, but self-loathing never did a guy any good.
*Awake by Godsmack plays over the speakers. Mr. X comes out of the curtains with his arms crossed like an X in front of his face. He then slowly separates his arms, but picks up speed until they fully extend. He then walks to the ring, climbs up the apron, and walks over the top rope. He then tightens his gloves and cracks his knuckles as he waits for the match to begin.*
Carlos: Mr. X has been going crazy without his Hardcore title with him, and Kurt Angle is the man he wants.
*"Medal" begins to play throughout the arena and the crowd chants "You Suck" along with the song as Kurt Angle makes his way onto the ramp with the XHF Hardcore championship around his waist. He stands almost frozen at the top of the ramp before throwing his arms up with his index fingers pointed towards the sky igniting red, white, and blue pyro from the ground into the air in an array of color. Kurt makes his way down the ramp, still with the same mixed reactions... he climbs into the ring and does his signature twirl and then takes off his medals and begins to warm up in the corner of the ring as his music dies out.*
Carlos: Im amazed that Angle went after the Hardcore title, I mean with the abilities this man processes one would think he would go for bigger gold.
XHF Hardcore Championship Match
Mr. X vs. Kurt Angle
*Angle starts with a charging forearm. X is up and they grapple. It is even for a while until X starts to push Angle back to the corner and then sends knee strikes to the gut. He grabs Angle by the throat but Angle floats over and locks in a waist lock and goes for a German Suplex. X grabs the ropes and holds. He sends a low blow to Angle and turns and hits a hard right hand. Angle rolls to his feet and they trade right hands until X grabs his throat and hurls him across the ring. X picks him up and hooks in a torture rack. Angle floats over and off to the floor. X turns and receives a guillotine drop. X rolls out of the ring. Angle hooks him and whips him into the ring steps shoulder first. He holds on and goes again into the barricade. He moves over and whips him into the ring post.*
*Angle lets out a signature WHOO! and grabs a kendo stick from under the ring. He swings but X falls over to the floor and the stick snaps on the post. Angle growls and goes to the timekeeper. He grabs the steel chair from under him as well as a medal. He hangs the medal inside his outfit but around his neck. He goes to X but gets a big boot to the head. Angle drops the chair and rolls to one knee. X grabs the chair as Angle stands and pulls out the medal. X swings but Angle ducks and spins him and sends a punch with the medal to X and X falls over busted open. Angle goes to pick him up but X hits a low blow and powerbombs him through the announcers table. Both men are down. After a few seconds X pins. 1 . . . 2 kick out. X picks up Angle but Angle hits a belly-to-belly over the barricade into the stands. They start trading punches to the backstage area. At the entrance they stop and X goes for a big boot but Angle reverses and rolls him into the steps.*
Carlos: Steel plus bodies isnt a good combination last time I checked.
*Angle laughs and starts punching X. Out of nowhere a fan comes and cracks a beer bottle over the head of Angle and he collapses. Both men are out.*
Carlos: What the hell was that!?
*After a few minutes X is up and surprised. He takes Angle into the hallway and starts punching his head against the walls. In the background is an odd scene. Smoke is billowing from under the locker room doors of both men. Neither notices. X goes to his room to get a weapon and opens the door and his jaw drops. His room is burnt to ashes. He goes to Kurts with the same result. Kurt is up and has a trash can lid from another room. He cracks it over Xs skull.*
Carlos: Talk about a headache.
*Angle locks in an Ankle Lock. X screams and fights it. He refuses to tap. After a few seconds Angle begins to really twist but X flips him into a door and Angle collapses. They head to the lobby via X dragging Angle. X punches him a few times before grabbing a sledgehammer. He swings but Angle ducks. He kicks him and hits a DDT. He grabs the sledge and waits for X. Mr. X stands right into a shot between the eyes. Angle locks in a leg lock. X wont give up. He grabs the sledgehammer but Kurt sees and dodges letting X hit his own leg. Kurt grabs a trashcan and sets it behind him. He picks up X and hits an Angle Slam onto it crushing it. 1 . . . 2 . . . 3!*
Winner and still XHF Hardcore Champion: Kurt Angle
Carlos: Kurt Angle retains his Hardcore Championship!
*X is barely moving. Kurt stands up when out of nowhere the fan from before comes out with a flaming 2x4 wrapped in barbed wire. Its Smash!*
Carlos: Wow, last time I saw Smash he was thrown off a scaffold by Death Trap.
*Kurt is up now and gets the 2x4 right into the spine. It sticks there and starts to burn the flesh. Kurt collapses. X is up and goes after Smash but Smash is fresh and easily dodges and hits a DDT. He brings X with him up a pile of boxes and sets for the tombstone off the top (The Wrecking Ball). He moves and hits the Wrecking Ball off the crates with Xs head landing on the barbed wire 2x4 on Angles back. Both men are stuck to it when EMTs arrive and free them and put out the fire. Smash just smiles and cackles holding the belt high pointing to Angle.*
Carlos: I guess he wants the Hardcore title.
"Man in a Box" hits the arena and Hardcore Harry and Slim Stevie Bone comes from behind the curtain and shows off by putting their hands in the air. Harry then points to the crowd to get them booing at him. Harry and SSB then head to the ring and goes right over the top rope. He gets in and goes to the ropes and raises his arms. When he does that he gets a loud burst of boos followed by Harry Sucks chants. He stands in the corner and waits for his opponent.
Carlos: Wow Mr. Ish, where were you the last match?
Ishnari: Wanking!
Carlos: Don't we all want to do that on TV...don't we all...
The beginning of Tourniquet by Marilyn Manson slowly echos through the arena, and green and blue lights fill the top of the ramp. After about 10 second the guitar kicks in, and The Xtreme Warrior jogs through the curtains, his clothes and body paint glowing in the light. He starts to jog and dance on the spot, touching the floor with his hands almost crawling, half the crowd cheering wildly to the entrance as the other half boo at his heelish attitude. The Xtreme Warrior then burst into a slow run, and makes his way down the ramp, slapping hands with some of the fans on the way down. Tourniquet by Marilyn Manson still playing loudly.
Take your hatred out on me
make your victim my head
you never ever believed in me
I am your tourniquet
The Xtreme Warrior quickly slides in the ring, where he jumps up a turnbuckle and brings his arms up in the air. He stays there for a couple of seconds, and then jumps down and runs to the turnbuckle on the opposite side of the ring, where he taunts the crowd again. He then jumps down, and starts to stretch at some ropes, and waits for the match to begin. "Come Out and Play (Gotta Keep 'em Separated)" by The Offspring plays and Lodi comes out with his signs that say... I love Ishnari! Lodi puts the signs on the floor and gives his sunglasses to a ring crew and awaits the bell.
Carlos: Mr. Ish, it seems like you have a fan.
Ishnari: He is but one of the mighty Ishnari army, a group of people that have fallen instantly in love with my wit and my wrestling brain.
XHF Tag Team Championship
Hardcore Harry and Slim Stevie Bone vs. The Xtreme Warrior and Lodi
*Slim Stevie Bone and Hardcore Harry talk strategy in their corner, as The Xtreme Warrior gets ready to start the match. Quickly, Harry is selected to start as the two lock up and the bell is rung, starting the match. Harry gets the advantage quickly and brings Warrior to one knee. He lets go of the hold and drops a double axe handle to Warrior's back. Harry runs back and hits the ropes, but Warrior quickly adjusts himself and sends Harry flying with a Monkey Flip!*
Carlos: That takes leg strength to flip a man that size across the ring.
Ishnari: Actually Carl, the Judo technique on which the monkey flip is based uses the momentum from the weight of the attacker falling to propel the opponent. Leg strength does not play that big a part.
*Warrior quickly snaps to his feet and grabs Harry by the arm, dragging him to his corner before he tags in his partner, Lodi. SSB attempts to enter the ring to stop this, but quickly the referee steps in between him as Lodi begins to climb to the top rope in his corner. Quickly though, Harry gets up and charges the corner, knocking Lodi down. Quickly though, Warrior gets back involved as he delivers a hard punch to Harry's jaw, almost knocking him down.*
Ishnari: Don't get me started on the referees around here.
*Lodi gets back up from the fall and begins to pound on Harry as Warrior exits the ring and the ref gets back involved in the match after calming SSB down. Lodi irish whips Harry, but it is reversed. On the comeback, Lodi quickly slides under Harry's legs but grabs them, bringing Harry down for a pin, 1... 2... Harry kicks out. Harry looks furious, but gets up quickly and hits the ropes, knocking Lodi down with a clothesline. Harry retreats to his corner and tags in his partner, SSB. SSB comes charging in and stomps on his opponent before he rushes to his opponents corner and knocks Warrior off of the apron. Quickly though Lodi jumps up and surprises SSB from behind german suplex! Harry charges the ring, but Lodi knocks him down and out of the ring with a dropkick. He sees that SSB is still down and decides to jump on the ropes, hitting a crossbody block! Lodi goes for the cover, 1... 2... 3!*
Winners and still XHF Tag Team Champions: Lodi and The Xtreme Warrior
Carlos: And Lodi and The Xtreme Warrior retain their titles.
Ishnari: Lodi with the crossbody block, an under apreciated move to keep the titles with him and Warrior for a little bit longer. Harry and SSB could be back for more though. I don't think they're going to give up soon.
*Suddenly the arena is plunged into total darkness and the begging of Marylin Manson This Is the New Shit hits the P.A. system. The Xtreme Tron goes from black to static and back to black, causing a strobe effect upon the crowd. When the music gets loud strobe lights explode the bright lights upon the crowd as the top of the entrance ramp begins glowing in a deep red. Slowly the curtain opens and Rat Bastard emerges. Rat makes his way down the ramp as the strobe lights ignite around him, making his walk look like slow motion. When he reaches the apron he climbs in as the dark red glow comes from above the ring now as Rat glares out at the fans*
Carlos: Rat Bastard is just so mean.
Ishnari: Ooh what a big meanie! SHUT UP CARL.
Carlos: He gave me a weedge the first day I came here! I hate that man for that.
Ishnari: I should do that to people I hate. Like you.
*The lights go completely out, many of the fans have lighters, lazer pens, etc and now have them on. Suddenly the screen turns on with a sea of static. The beginning of Burn to Burn by Static-X hits the speakers. The music takes a pause as nothing but a deep, slow voice is heard reciting the beginning of the song.*
"Static in sound...
Uncurable
You plant the seed...
You feel the need"
*A loud and booming scream is heard as pyro goes off at the top of the ramp, the ball of fire followed by the billowing smoke, first thing to be seen is the shiny XHF Title, and through it all, out walks Reeshi, revealing that very title over his shoulder. Reeshi is greeted with the boos from the fans, he takes it all in, ignoring every one of them with the exception of one where he stops along the side of the entranceway and taunts the fan. Once down the ramp Reeshi reaches the ring and slides under the bottom rope. He walks to the far side and climbs the turnbuckle, raising both arms, the XHF Title in one hand, into the air, showboating to hate filled fans. Reeshi steps down and stands in the middle of the ring, adjusting the title on his shoulder, giving it a pat here or there, letting everybody know that the title belongs to him.*
Carlos: But maybe the only man meaner than Ratthe XHF Champion.
Ishnari: Maybe next week we can have a Mega Meanie Match between Reeshi and Simon Cowell.
XHF World Heavyweight Championship
Rat Bastard vs. Reeshi
The two competitors stare at each other, as the bell rings. The two walk up to each other, but Rat Bastard being the cheater he is, takes a cheap shot with a knee to the stomach. Rat Bastard grabs the wrist of Reeshi and whips him into the ropes and goes for a clothesline, but Reeshi ducks and waits for Rat Bastard to turn around. When Rat does Reeshi lifts Rat up to his shoulders for the Oreeshinator, but Rat Bastard slides off and slams Reeshis arm down going for the Rat Trap! Reeshi refuses for the move to be locked in though, as he rolls out of the way. Reeshi rolls out of the ring and stands up and looks at Rat Bastard, as Rat Bastard is up to his feet taunting for Reeshi to get into the ring. Reeshi climbs up to the apron, and Rat Bastard once again takes a cheap shot as he runs to Reeshi, and knocks him off the apron with a kitchen sink. Reeshi hits the railing and Rat Bastard follows him, and sends fists into the face of Reeshi, each shot making Reeshi flinch. Rat Bastard grabs the head of Reeshi and bends him over, driving his knee into his face. Rat holds onto Reeshi and throws him into the side of the ring, Reeshi crashing into it with great impact. Reeshi is sitting against the ring holding his head, and Rat begins to stomp on his chest. The referee begins to shout at Rat Bastard to get into the ring, but Rat Bastard flips him off.
Carlos: Jeez, Rat just hates everybody doesnt he?
Ishnari: He loves the laydeez.
Rat Bastard is now laughing as he is lifting Reeshi up to his feet, and grabs him in a front facelock. Rat Bastard throws Reeshis arm behind his neck and grabs Reeshi by the tights, and lifts him up and drops him with a suplex onto the padding! Reeshi sits up and holds his back, as Rat Bastard climbs up to his feet. Rat sees Reeshi sitting up, so he grabs him by the head and lifts him up to his feet. Rat Bastard rolls Reeshi into the ring, and Rat Bastard makes the first cover of the match up. Reeshi kicks out before the count of three, keeping his XHF title in tact. Rat Bastard is on his knees and punches Reeshi in the face a couple of times, but then lifts him up to his feet. Rat Bastard places Reeshis arm onto his shoulder and grabs Reeshi trying to lift him up for a t-bone suplex, but Reeshi keeps his weight down and elbows Rat in the head. Reeshi finally releases Rat Bastard off of him and runs to the ropes going for a move, but Rat is able to recover and grabs Reeshi, and throws him with an overhead belly-to-belly suplex! Rat Bastard crawls over to Reeshi and hooks the leg, but Reeshi gets a shoulder up before the count of three. Rat sits Reeshi up and applies a sleeper hold, and pulls him back down to the mat, choking all the air out of the champion.
Carlos: Reeshi doesnt seem like his usual self. By now Reeshi usually has the upper hand on his opponent, but now it seems like Rat Bastard is dominating the match. Could we see a title change tonight?
Ishnari: I've always said it man - brains win matches. These two have lots of the stuff. Either could win it.
Reeshi grabs the arm of Rat Bastard and tries to get him to let go, but Rat Bastard refuses and uses all of his strength to keep the arm around Reeshis neck. Reeshi soon stops trying, as he is now almost unconscious. Rat Bastard begins to laugh, but then screams for the referee to ask if he quits. The referee asks Reeshi, but Reeshi shakes his head, not wanting to lose his championship. Suddenly the referee grabs Reeshis wrist and lifts it up in the air and then lets go, and it drops. The referee lifts Reeshis arm up once again and lets go, and it falls to the mat for the second time. The referee signals to the crowd that it needs to drop one more time for Rat Bastard to win the match, and he lifts Reeshis arm up in the air. The referee lets go, and Reeshis hand begins to fall to the mat, until he is able to keep it up in the air! Rat Bastard screams in disbelief, as Reeshi slowly begins to roll up to his feet. Reeshi is finally up to his feet, but Rat Bastard takes the champion by surprise, but slamming him down with a sleeper drop! Rat Bastard quickly covers Reeshi, but Reeshi just kicks out!
Carlos: Rat Bastard really wants this win, and he used a smart maneuver like that. Rat Bastard has been to the top before and loves the taste, so I think hes going to do stuff that he usually doesnt do so he can win the title back from the one who took it from him.
Ishnari: What sort of stuff doesn't Rat Bastard usually do? Give to charity? Celibacy?
Rat Bastard stands up with his hands on his hips thinking of what he could have done, but he comes to a conclusion. Rat Bastard walks to Reeshi and lifts him up and slams him down with a bodyslam, but then goes to the apron. Rat Bastard walks to the nearest turnbuckle and places his foot on the second turnbuckle, and spits at the crowd. The crowd immediately boos as Rat cockily smirks at the crowd, and then climbs all the way to the top. Rat spreads his arms and leaps off the top rope going for the Drop Of 1000 Bastards, but right before Rat can hit Reeshi moves out of the way! Rats face bounces off the mat, as Reeshi rolls to the nearest corner. Rat Bastard holds his face as he slowly climbs up to his feet, as Reeshi uses the ropes to get to his feet. Rat Bastard turns to Reeshi, who runs to him and lifts a boot up hitting him in the face! Rat Bastard falls to the mat and Reeshi falls on top of him and the referee starts the count, but Rat kicks out before the count of three!
Carlos: Rat has a face of steel, taking two shots to the face like that; any normal man would either have a broken nose or a concussion.
Ishnari: Plan B! Plan B!
Reeshi sits up in disgust that Rat Bastard kicked out, as he then stands up. Reeshi bends over and grabs Rat by the hair, but when the referee is not looking, Rat Bastard gives Reeshi a low blow! Reeshi falls to the mat holding his groin, as Rat Bastard stands up with another smile on his face. Reeshi is obviously in pain, as Rat grabs him by the ankle and drags him into the center of the ring. Rat Bastard covers Reeshi, 1-2-Reeshi just gets a shoulder up. Rat Bastard is irate with that, and he then climbs up to his feet and stomps on the champion, who rolls to his stomach. Rat grabs Reeshi by the hair and shouts something to the crowd, and slowly lifts Reeshi up in a bent over position. Reeshi is positioned between the legs of Rat Bastard, as Rat grabs Reeshis waist. Rat flips Reeshi onto his shoulders for a Bastard Bomb, but Reeshi begins punching Rat in the face! Rat Bastard wont release Reeshi though, and he slams him hard into the mat with a Bastard Bomb! Rat hooks the leg of Reeshi, 1-2-Reeshi kicks out once again!
Carlos: And Reeshi kicks out again!
Ishnari: Ah man the Bastard Bomb is such a harsh move. So difficult to kick out of. They're destroying each other.
Rat Bastard is xtremely upset by this, as he stands up and says something to a fan in the front row. The fan and Rat Bastard continue to exchange words with one another.
Carlos: What is Rat doing talking to the fan? He should be taking advantage of the situation.
Ishnari: We had something similar last show. The XHF installs passion in all of its fans and the performers have to deal with that.
Rat Bastard continues to argue with the fan, as Reeshi slowly climbs up to his feet. Reeshi is finally all the way to his feet, as the argument continues. Suddenly Rat Bastard is taken by surprise as Reeshi turns him around and lifts him onto his shoulders, and hits the Oreeshinator! Reeshi covers Rat and the referee makes the count, 1-2-3!
Winner and still XHF World Heavyweight Champion: Reeshi
Carlos: And Reeshi retains the XHF title, and shows why he is the best this company has to offer.
Ishnari: Nu-uh. It was just the golden rule. Idiocy cost Bastard the match. Idiocy won Reeshi the match. Idiocy is a powerful thing Carl, you need to harness it so that it is on your side.
Fade out.