And if they're Northern, that makes it even worse.
Nov 2, 2022 20:26:14 GMT -5
fowler, robriot, and 1 more like this
Post by Visit Neom on Nov 2, 2022 20:26:14 GMT -5
(O’Neil charged inside without warning, driving his fists into Kira’s head before he jerked him upwards for a backdrop! The fans booed, and the ref waved his arms!)
Tucker: Typical! Typical Skulls!
(A wrestling fan, working the overnight shift at a hotel convenience store, watches the PPV on a tablet. Marty Donovan, covered in bruises and dressed in Haunted Mansion wallpaper pajamas, limps into the store. For some reason he is wearing his Hardkore World title.)
Fan: Marty Donovan! You didn’t stick around for Havok and Fowler?
Marty: Brother, I got 10 hours of flying tomorrow. They’re lucky I stayed through my whole match.
(Marty wanders the store, turning around any items that have non-Disney characters on them.)
Fan: Your best friend must be thrilled.
Marty: You get CAR here? Oh. Wes. Yeah. Thrilled.
(The champion grabs some ice cream sandwiches and double checks they are Mickey branded before paying.)
Fan: The lads and I will be at the Liverpool show, looking forward to your match.
Marty: Thanks, buddy.
(Marty limps out of the store. A beat later he runs back in, looking terrified.)
Marty: You meant to say the show in Boston, right? Hardkore World?
Fan: No, the next Wrestle: UK show. Wesley asked for a tag match. Mr.Blood just announced it online. Hey, since you’re wearing the belt, can I get a picture?
(Marty embraces the fan for a selfie while internally screaming. The scene changes to Heathrow airport the next morning. Marty kills time in a tourist trap called Glorious Britain. The radio plays We Hate It When Our Friends Become Successful by Morrissey. )
Marty: Wesley, let me be the first person to congratulate you on the big win. I wish we could have celebrated, but there were too many work emails. You will never guess who’s in Thor 7.
(Marty wanders aimlessly by a display of Union Jack rubber duckies.)
Marty: What you did last night was impressive, somewhat. You didn’t enter all the way back at #3 and still reach the podium.You didn’t defeat multiple wrestlers after being hit by a car. Really, compared to winning the world title a week after being stabbed, your Battle Of Britain thing was minuscule. Still, there is a lot of pressure in the 20th spot and you actually didn’t screw it up.
( He picks up a rubber duck and gives it an angry squeeze before moving on.)
Marty: There are things more important than winning. Last night was the first time you ever hit a proper “Dis-Knee''. Don’t get me wrong, “In The Face” is a good little move. You only needed five of them to knock down Primal. I knew you could do better though. All it took was a time in the ring with Marty to learn a real finisher. You’re a good student.
(He inspects a display of magnets showing paintings of classic British scenes. The camera zooms in on one showing a fox hunt and Marty smiles for the first time in the promo.)
Marty: When Spike broke free, I stood my ground. I easily could have dodged your knee, but Marty Donovan is a generous leader. Throwing that match did wonders for your noted low self-esteem.
(He tosses the magnets in his shopping cart, before deciding to grab three more.)
Marty: Wesley, thank you for the thoughtful gift. Deciding to forgo a shot at the world title to be tag champions with me is extremely generous. It also shows why you have the “Big Brain” moniker. You’re smart enough to realize you’re not a top guy yet, might as well take a few years to study under the master.
(Marty admires a table of famous bobble heads. The smile fades when he sees one of Syberus. Scowling, he leans down and swats his rival over. Marty glares straight into the camera. )
Marty: That is your plan, right? I only ask because if that isn’t the case, if I’m losing twenty hours of my life traveling for some meaningless tag opener, then I will be fucking livid.
( Frustrated, Marty is at a loss of words for a moment and collects his thoughts. He’s not used to telling the truth. The champion approaches key chains of the London tube roundel. Instead of actual stations they have popular names printed on them.)
Marty: People will claim I’m kissing Walt’s ass here, but leaving Orlando gives me an overwhelming homesickness. I’ve been living the life on the road since age 16, but now I suddenly dread it. Who knows, I guess it really is the happiest place on Earth.
(He hunts through the display. His search, having only turned up an abundance of “Omar” and “Oscar” key chains, ends empty handed.)
Marty: So you understand my frustration? There has to be a reward at the end of this transatlantic rainbow. Give me a shiny belt, a big trophy, that serb’s head on a platter. Anything, Wes! I know you struggled to fill that tiny venue today, but you can’t just turn on the Mouse-Signal every time. You have to make a few fans of your own!
( Marty passes by a cut out of King Charles and shakes his head.)
Marty: His majesty, Mr.Blood, also needs to make things right. I never agreed to work more dates. The least he can do is lend Hardkore World some talent. Send us Kalmin Watts or Ronnie Long next month. I’d suggest Spike, but Kilroy has already filled our quota of fat guys with accents.
( Marty places a teddy bear dressed as a Royal Guard in his basket.)
Marty: I’m not worried about these backwater Glucks, nor am I worried about you, Wes. You will do the right thing and announce your intention to go for the tag titles. Who knows, maybe teaming with me will make Katie forget you’re not in her league.
(Marty winks to the camera and goes to buy his souvenirs as the shot fades out.)
Tucker: Typical! Typical Skulls!
(A wrestling fan, working the overnight shift at a hotel convenience store, watches the PPV on a tablet. Marty Donovan, covered in bruises and dressed in Haunted Mansion wallpaper pajamas, limps into the store. For some reason he is wearing his Hardkore World title.)
Fan: Marty Donovan! You didn’t stick around for Havok and Fowler?
Marty: Brother, I got 10 hours of flying tomorrow. They’re lucky I stayed through my whole match.
(Marty wanders the store, turning around any items that have non-Disney characters on them.)
Fan: Your best friend must be thrilled.
Marty: You get CAR here? Oh. Wes. Yeah. Thrilled.
(The champion grabs some ice cream sandwiches and double checks they are Mickey branded before paying.)
Fan: The lads and I will be at the Liverpool show, looking forward to your match.
Marty: Thanks, buddy.
(Marty limps out of the store. A beat later he runs back in, looking terrified.)
Marty: You meant to say the show in Boston, right? Hardkore World?
Fan: No, the next Wrestle: UK show. Wesley asked for a tag match. Mr.Blood just announced it online. Hey, since you’re wearing the belt, can I get a picture?
(Marty embraces the fan for a selfie while internally screaming. The scene changes to Heathrow airport the next morning. Marty kills time in a tourist trap called Glorious Britain. The radio plays We Hate It When Our Friends Become Successful by Morrissey. )
Marty: Wesley, let me be the first person to congratulate you on the big win. I wish we could have celebrated, but there were too many work emails. You will never guess who’s in Thor 7.
(Marty wanders aimlessly by a display of Union Jack rubber duckies.)
Marty: What you did last night was impressive, somewhat. You didn’t enter all the way back at #3 and still reach the podium.You didn’t defeat multiple wrestlers after being hit by a car. Really, compared to winning the world title a week after being stabbed, your Battle Of Britain thing was minuscule. Still, there is a lot of pressure in the 20th spot and you actually didn’t screw it up.
( He picks up a rubber duck and gives it an angry squeeze before moving on.)
Marty: There are things more important than winning. Last night was the first time you ever hit a proper “Dis-Knee''. Don’t get me wrong, “In The Face” is a good little move. You only needed five of them to knock down Primal. I knew you could do better though. All it took was a time in the ring with Marty to learn a real finisher. You’re a good student.
(He inspects a display of magnets showing paintings of classic British scenes. The camera zooms in on one showing a fox hunt and Marty smiles for the first time in the promo.)
Marty: When Spike broke free, I stood my ground. I easily could have dodged your knee, but Marty Donovan is a generous leader. Throwing that match did wonders for your noted low self-esteem.
(He tosses the magnets in his shopping cart, before deciding to grab three more.)
Marty: Wesley, thank you for the thoughtful gift. Deciding to forgo a shot at the world title to be tag champions with me is extremely generous. It also shows why you have the “Big Brain” moniker. You’re smart enough to realize you’re not a top guy yet, might as well take a few years to study under the master.
(Marty admires a table of famous bobble heads. The smile fades when he sees one of Syberus. Scowling, he leans down and swats his rival over. Marty glares straight into the camera. )
Marty: That is your plan, right? I only ask because if that isn’t the case, if I’m losing twenty hours of my life traveling for some meaningless tag opener, then I will be fucking livid.
( Frustrated, Marty is at a loss of words for a moment and collects his thoughts. He’s not used to telling the truth. The champion approaches key chains of the London tube roundel. Instead of actual stations they have popular names printed on them.)
Marty: People will claim I’m kissing Walt’s ass here, but leaving Orlando gives me an overwhelming homesickness. I’ve been living the life on the road since age 16, but now I suddenly dread it. Who knows, I guess it really is the happiest place on Earth.
(He hunts through the display. His search, having only turned up an abundance of “Omar” and “Oscar” key chains, ends empty handed.)
Marty: So you understand my frustration? There has to be a reward at the end of this transatlantic rainbow. Give me a shiny belt, a big trophy, that serb’s head on a platter. Anything, Wes! I know you struggled to fill that tiny venue today, but you can’t just turn on the Mouse-Signal every time. You have to make a few fans of your own!
( Marty passes by a cut out of King Charles and shakes his head.)
Marty: His majesty, Mr.Blood, also needs to make things right. I never agreed to work more dates. The least he can do is lend Hardkore World some talent. Send us Kalmin Watts or Ronnie Long next month. I’d suggest Spike, but Kilroy has already filled our quota of fat guys with accents.
( Marty places a teddy bear dressed as a Royal Guard in his basket.)
Marty: I’m not worried about these backwater Glucks, nor am I worried about you, Wes. You will do the right thing and announce your intention to go for the tag titles. Who knows, maybe teaming with me will make Katie forget you’re not in her league.
(Marty winks to the camera and goes to buy his souvenirs as the shot fades out.)