Steve, MacGuffins, and Remoras.
Nov 25, 2022 12:53:10 GMT -5
Jesse Jamester and REIGN Board of Directors like this
Post by Donzig on Nov 25, 2022 12:53:10 GMT -5
'Pride? Right in the Pride region?'
There is a sound like a throat being cleared, and then a wet splat in the darkness before Donzig leans forward to adjust his mask. A shrug, and the Scourge stares before a hand lifts absently, and he shakes his head.
'What in the fuck do you know of pride? What pray-tell Steve do you think you have to be proud of? The fact that what one time, one fucking time, that somehow you managed to take the X-Crown off of a man who left you for dead every single fucking time you have faced off? Is that it? Is it because you managed to do your same old fucking schtick that you have been dragging around like a dead horse for an eternity of men? Pop-culture reference, pop culture reference, self depreciating remark, act cool, make joke, pop culture reference, rinse and repeat?'
Donzig stared.
'At least Kanyon's bits are fucking funny.'
Donzig rose, and he paced slowly before a hand lifted to gesture at the camera as he swept back and forth.
'Our company? Our Company? OUR? Well, Steve, with all due respect which is very little? On day one when REIGN opened, I happened to be here. I have in fact been here for every single show, every single card! In fact, some people not fucking deluded collar-popping fuckboys would say that I built Reign! That Esmeralda Von Krauss built Reign! That we made Reign by coming out here, and tearing the house down every single show. And then one day? Some self-serving little weasel crawled in here holding that title that the people who devalue it with their BULLSHIT because he couldn't take the heat from the same six people again! Or maybe he was tired of whatever mockery of the Sport of Kings was going on wherever he was! Maybe he was tired of wrestling bears! But I guess they aren't repetitive are they Steve?'
Donzig paused, and his back was to the camera. His head lifted, and he looked up at the sky.
'Yes, I know fucking children who are uneducated, clueless, or just say shit they suppose is edgy like 'Donzig is boring!' You know the type, people who win the X-Crown with whatever pop-culture reference, or weird nonsense cinematic shit that floats into their mind. But you see, Steve Mediocre? This is a little thing I call 'wrestling', and in this thing I call 'wrestling' and I can see why you are confused since for you it is all stabbings, and comedy bits, and you sucking cock? We have these things called 'characters' or 'personality', and I can see why you are confused because?'
His hand slid to the side, and he shrugged.
'You don't have either.'
A snort.
'But a character or a personality, would need to say and act almost the same way to maintain something we call 'continuity' and 'believability'. You know like we are supposed to believe that MacGuffin you all act like means so much actually means fuck all since it is just passed back and forth wily nily by the same group of guys doing the same old shit.'
Donzig bowed his head, taking a deep breath before he slowly turned again. His fingers tapped against the slits of his mask, and he shrugged as he walked forward. And he wagged a finger, tsking.
'Not on your level? What fucking level would that be, Steve? I have been called many things over my life, but you're right. No one has ever called me a fucking 'scavenger', a 'jackal', or a 'remora' waiting for the scraps of my betters. But we all call you those things, constantly. You're a whore, Steve. And while I have been known to do some unsavory things for money? Well, I am very honest about it.'
Donzig extended his pinky, holding it out as he shook back the sleeve of his long leather coat. And he stared at it, motioning the camera closer.
'You may have held the X-Crown, you may be the darling of the Network brass, and you might be leeching off of Rat Bastard in a bid to stay relevant! The REIGN Board of Directors may be eager to stroke you off, Mediocre. But facts are? I have more talent in this pinky then you have in your entire body, so you can simp and make pop culture jokes like a Great Value Young Buck? But aside from one time? Everytime you are in a ring with me? You are looking at the lights aren't you, bro. That is why I am EVERYWHERE, and you're just 'everywhere', eh?'
The camera was shoved back, and Donzig stared at his hand.
'By the way, I notice the supposedly great and evil Zoran roaming around much like Steve with his X-Crown in one hand, and his cock in the other! And yet I notice that he like most of the so called X-Crown Champions stays so very far away from my reach. Just wild isn't it? Especially since I am everywhere, and I do mean literally EVERYWHERE! Maybe I am boring, maybe I am not in the Clique, maybe I don't get on my knees!'
A shrug, and Donzig continued as he started to pace again.
'By the way, Steve, since I know you don't actually follow events on the Network since you are too busy verbally masturbating yourself like a two-armed JROK champion. I want you to know that at my last ladder match? I stabbed a man in the eye, and just to be real with you? He was just in my way, I didn't hate him, I didn't not like him, it wasn't spite, he was just in the fucking way. And fun fact, since the infamous Morningstar incident of 2007? I have hated ladder matches, I just hate them! They just put me in a foul mood, Steve. They make me enraged, just thinking about a ladder match?'
Donzig's voice had risen, and his hands had balled into fists at his sides. Fingers twisted into claws as he tilted his masked head, he took a deep breath before a hand lifted to brush across his mask. He shook his head, and then turned away as he paced once more.
'Well, Steve, I have alot of animosity for you and Rat. In fact, Steve? You might just want to stay home, because you know how I get when I am--' Donzig shrugged. '--angry. Which brings me to another MacGuffin, and that is my Big Top Plate. You see I may think these plates that the Usurper made are terrible, I may despise them, but facts are? No one in this company, or on this fucking network has given more value to these MacGuffins than me! You see unlike the one you are so proud of? These ones have actual value, they have worth, they mean something! And no, no, no! Even if I want to watch REIGN burn, even as I want it to suffer? I won't let a thing, a creature like you taint my legacy! I won't have you turn it into a mockery of something I once loved in my own fashion!'
The Scourge paused, and his head lifted.
'Speaking of love, Steve? They say to hate someone, to truly hate someone, you had to have once loved them. Now there are some on the XHF Network, that will tell you that Donzig can't love, that the Great Dark doesn't have any love in him, that Death in High Places is incapable of love. But I assure you, that there are things that I do love. But, there is a thin line between love and hate isn't there? And so Steve I just want you to know that when I see your collar popping ass at Hatley Castle? You will ask God that he sends Zoran to finish you before I get my hands around your fucking throat!'
Donzig lifted a hand, a finger lifting.
'Remember your Shelley: I have love in me the likes of which you can scarcely imagine and rage the likes of which you would not believe. If I cannot satisfy the one, I will indulge the other.'
The hand fell, and Donzig paced before he turned to sweep forward again.
'I hope this hasn't bored you, Steve. I hope this wasn't too fucking repetitive for you. You know I am actually starting to think since you people won't come to me? I should hunt you all down, I should hunt down all of you fucking so called champions who rest on your laurels of that hot potato of a belt, and show you what a champion is capable of! It is what you all deserve.'
Donzig tilted his head, and then he lifted a hand to wipe across the mouth of his mask as he stared.
'You don't get the catchphrase.'
There is a sound like a throat being cleared, and then a wet splat in the darkness before Donzig leans forward to adjust his mask. A shrug, and the Scourge stares before a hand lifts absently, and he shakes his head.
'What in the fuck do you know of pride? What pray-tell Steve do you think you have to be proud of? The fact that what one time, one fucking time, that somehow you managed to take the X-Crown off of a man who left you for dead every single fucking time you have faced off? Is that it? Is it because you managed to do your same old fucking schtick that you have been dragging around like a dead horse for an eternity of men? Pop-culture reference, pop culture reference, self depreciating remark, act cool, make joke, pop culture reference, rinse and repeat?'
Donzig stared.
'At least Kanyon's bits are fucking funny.'
Donzig rose, and he paced slowly before a hand lifted to gesture at the camera as he swept back and forth.
'Our company? Our Company? OUR? Well, Steve, with all due respect which is very little? On day one when REIGN opened, I happened to be here. I have in fact been here for every single show, every single card! In fact, some people not fucking deluded collar-popping fuckboys would say that I built Reign! That Esmeralda Von Krauss built Reign! That we made Reign by coming out here, and tearing the house down every single show. And then one day? Some self-serving little weasel crawled in here holding that title that the people who devalue it with their BULLSHIT because he couldn't take the heat from the same six people again! Or maybe he was tired of whatever mockery of the Sport of Kings was going on wherever he was! Maybe he was tired of wrestling bears! But I guess they aren't repetitive are they Steve?'
Donzig paused, and his back was to the camera. His head lifted, and he looked up at the sky.
'Yes, I know fucking children who are uneducated, clueless, or just say shit they suppose is edgy like 'Donzig is boring!' You know the type, people who win the X-Crown with whatever pop-culture reference, or weird nonsense cinematic shit that floats into their mind. But you see, Steve Mediocre? This is a little thing I call 'wrestling', and in this thing I call 'wrestling' and I can see why you are confused since for you it is all stabbings, and comedy bits, and you sucking cock? We have these things called 'characters' or 'personality', and I can see why you are confused because?'
His hand slid to the side, and he shrugged.
'You don't have either.'
A snort.
'But a character or a personality, would need to say and act almost the same way to maintain something we call 'continuity' and 'believability'. You know like we are supposed to believe that MacGuffin you all act like means so much actually means fuck all since it is just passed back and forth wily nily by the same group of guys doing the same old shit.'
Donzig bowed his head, taking a deep breath before he slowly turned again. His fingers tapped against the slits of his mask, and he shrugged as he walked forward. And he wagged a finger, tsking.
'Not on your level? What fucking level would that be, Steve? I have been called many things over my life, but you're right. No one has ever called me a fucking 'scavenger', a 'jackal', or a 'remora' waiting for the scraps of my betters. But we all call you those things, constantly. You're a whore, Steve. And while I have been known to do some unsavory things for money? Well, I am very honest about it.'
Donzig extended his pinky, holding it out as he shook back the sleeve of his long leather coat. And he stared at it, motioning the camera closer.
'You may have held the X-Crown, you may be the darling of the Network brass, and you might be leeching off of Rat Bastard in a bid to stay relevant! The REIGN Board of Directors may be eager to stroke you off, Mediocre. But facts are? I have more talent in this pinky then you have in your entire body, so you can simp and make pop culture jokes like a Great Value Young Buck? But aside from one time? Everytime you are in a ring with me? You are looking at the lights aren't you, bro. That is why I am EVERYWHERE, and you're just 'everywhere', eh?'
The camera was shoved back, and Donzig stared at his hand.
'By the way, I notice the supposedly great and evil Zoran roaming around much like Steve with his X-Crown in one hand, and his cock in the other! And yet I notice that he like most of the so called X-Crown Champions stays so very far away from my reach. Just wild isn't it? Especially since I am everywhere, and I do mean literally EVERYWHERE! Maybe I am boring, maybe I am not in the Clique, maybe I don't get on my knees!'
A shrug, and Donzig continued as he started to pace again.
'By the way, Steve, since I know you don't actually follow events on the Network since you are too busy verbally masturbating yourself like a two-armed JROK champion. I want you to know that at my last ladder match? I stabbed a man in the eye, and just to be real with you? He was just in my way, I didn't hate him, I didn't not like him, it wasn't spite, he was just in the fucking way. And fun fact, since the infamous Morningstar incident of 2007? I have hated ladder matches, I just hate them! They just put me in a foul mood, Steve. They make me enraged, just thinking about a ladder match?'
Donzig's voice had risen, and his hands had balled into fists at his sides. Fingers twisted into claws as he tilted his masked head, he took a deep breath before a hand lifted to brush across his mask. He shook his head, and then turned away as he paced once more.
'Well, Steve, I have alot of animosity for you and Rat. In fact, Steve? You might just want to stay home, because you know how I get when I am--' Donzig shrugged. '--angry. Which brings me to another MacGuffin, and that is my Big Top Plate. You see I may think these plates that the Usurper made are terrible, I may despise them, but facts are? No one in this company, or on this fucking network has given more value to these MacGuffins than me! You see unlike the one you are so proud of? These ones have actual value, they have worth, they mean something! And no, no, no! Even if I want to watch REIGN burn, even as I want it to suffer? I won't let a thing, a creature like you taint my legacy! I won't have you turn it into a mockery of something I once loved in my own fashion!'
The Scourge paused, and his head lifted.
'Speaking of love, Steve? They say to hate someone, to truly hate someone, you had to have once loved them. Now there are some on the XHF Network, that will tell you that Donzig can't love, that the Great Dark doesn't have any love in him, that Death in High Places is incapable of love. But I assure you, that there are things that I do love. But, there is a thin line between love and hate isn't there? And so Steve I just want you to know that when I see your collar popping ass at Hatley Castle? You will ask God that he sends Zoran to finish you before I get my hands around your fucking throat!'
Donzig lifted a hand, a finger lifting.
'Remember your Shelley: I have love in me the likes of which you can scarcely imagine and rage the likes of which you would not believe. If I cannot satisfy the one, I will indulge the other.'
The hand fell, and Donzig paced before he turned to sweep forward again.
'I hope this hasn't bored you, Steve. I hope this wasn't too fucking repetitive for you. You know I am actually starting to think since you people won't come to me? I should hunt you all down, I should hunt down all of you fucking so called champions who rest on your laurels of that hot potato of a belt, and show you what a champion is capable of! It is what you all deserve.'
Donzig tilted his head, and then he lifted a hand to wipe across the mouth of his mask as he stared.
'You don't get the catchphrase.'