Post by Dave D-Flipz on Dec 18, 2022 23:01:01 GMT -5
Santa: HO HO HO!
*The scene opens up in the very place shown on the Hot Cocoa with Santa card. A jolly old St. Nicholas sits in a book nook in the corner of a dodecagonal building loaded with tourists, gift stands, clothes, etc. The stereotypical red hat and coat are there, as is the bushy white beard. The pants are green and the boots are brown. But the man seems a right jolly old elf. The Finnish people seem to be paying him about as much attention as any other attraction. Mild bemusement and mostly indifference. Occasionally a person will randomly go over and sit with Santa and share a cup of hot beverage; tea, cocoa, wassail, the like. Browsing the building with an impressed look is a man with a fancy Armani suit and a black bowler hat.*
Mall Santa: *sigh* Ho ho … ho … I guess. Next!
*The scene opens up in a dingy mall. There are open store outlets all over where various stores have been abandoned due to high rent and the American desire for malls having basically cratered lower than Mongo’s win percentage over farm animals. The mall Santa has on the full on red suit with big belt and toy sack next to him but the beard is sliding down his face, he looks tired and disheveled. His elf handlers are clearly keeping him in line. The Santa stage is a big sleigh shaped throne next to a gazebo and a water fountain feature which for some reason is still running, the fake reindeer are soaking wet and falling apart. There is a line a mile long of angry parents, crying babies, misbehaving toddlers, and a single pair of well dressed women and their teenage ward.*
Dr. Chaos: If I hear one more brat whine about this year’s Hess truck being out of stock, I swear to Dog I will-
Santa: SLAY THEM! Oh ho ho yes, continue to slay them my friend. Your comedy set is wonderful. I’ll be sure to pack your stocking with the finest chocolates and some nips to warm the throat and heart.
*Santa waves to a woman wearing a sweater and a skirt over festive stockings. She walks off with a grin and a handful of marshmallows. The man in the bowler hat takes notice and looks over to see what the deal is. He looks around. No line or anything. He shrugs and grabs his mug of hot cocoa with whipped cream and caramel drizzle and orders a coffee, cream and Splenda as well.*
Death Trap: When in Rome, I guess. Might as well go see what the big deal is. Besides I could use someone to talk to. My companions have been at the mall all morning. It’s getting late here. 8PM. Wonder what has them all tied up? Ah what the heck, I love talking to new people.
Dr. Chaos: I HATE TALKING TO NEW PEOPLE! Stay away from my daughter you sniveling brat! We are NOT going to be sick for the holidays! My mistress needs her full health to handle that witch!
Mall Santa: Next…
Sarah: Clooooooose!
Mistress Discipline: Not close enough Sarah, we have been here all morning! I was supposed to video call Death Trap two hours ago. And now it is after dinner there, and we have missed lunch. I am hungry, Chaos. Why do I have to wait in line with you?
Dr. Chaos: If I, your best friend, have to suffer … so do you! It’s ONLY fair. It’s in my contract! My daughter wants to see Santa and ask for something. So we wait and make her happy. I’m sure Death Trap is all tied up as well!
Santa: Ho ho ho, well hello my good sir. A man in such a fine suit is usually all tied up at the moment. What has you so alone and glum, chum?
Death Trap: Oh you speak English? Sweet. Ah I was just supposed to video call with my tag team partner, and uh … I guess wife now.. *he laughs* gonna take some getting used to.
Santa: Well congratulations! Surely a man of such distinction and positive affect has as fine a taste in women as he does in his outfit-
*He spots the bowler hat.*
Santa: *cough* Er that is to say, I’m sure your companion is out having a wonderful time!
Mistress Discipline: I AM HAVING AN AWFUL TIME, CHAOS! My blood sugar is tanking. I am going to go obtain us some pretzels!
*Mistress walks off in a huff, mumbling about how she’d rather be stuck in the same room with Donzig than be here.*
Mall Santa: *Sigh* How many more brats are there? Ugh, ok teenager. NEXT!
Sarah: MY TURN!!!
*Sarah sprints up and leaps onto the Santa’s lap.*
Mall Santa: OOOOF! Kid you could have just sat, I’m sore from being here all day. *ahem* Alright, little one. Have you been good this year?
Dr. Chaos: Better than her mother, that’s for sure *forced chuckle*
Sarah: WANT A-
Death Trap: -Red Ryder BB Gun. I tried to talk them out of it…
Santa: She’ll shoot her eye out, sir!
Death Trap: THAT’S WHAT I SAID! But she is dead set on having it and so they went to the mall to see another mall Santa. I bet they’re having a fun day and just forgot about me.
Santa: Has your day been so bad, lad?
Death Trap: Actually, no! This place is easily one of the nicest REIGN has visited. I love it here. And around Christmas, to be with a Santa is pretty cool. Still I have something to do before celebrating. And it sucks I won’t be able to be with my wife for HER match Christmas Eve.
Santa: Oh? And why is that?
Death Trap: REIGN’s show Hot Cocoa with Santa … *he looks at his company and his cup* Heh … heh that’s funny … *he shakes his head* is Christmas Eve here. Oh Violent Night 3 is in Pennsylvania, USA on the same night. I’d need a private jet and to leave early to make it there. I mean Donzig somehow got one…
Santa: What is this match?
Death Trap: Heh, I should ask you for help. Esmeralda von Krauss.
*The jolly elf recoils as fear covers his face*
Santa: Whoa whoa whoa, no no no, sir. I am not about to get involved with that demon and her mate. She is something even the angels fear. She will kill you, son. She is ancient. She is evil, corrupted by her life experience.
*DT looks confused*
Death Trap: I mean … as far as I know I’m not really on her radar of people to kill. Her husband hates me, she is indifferent. Plus she seeks the plates for power in this fed. And this match is a pure wrestling match. She wants these plates, yes. But I think she underestimates me. I handled her husband back in SWAT, I should be able to show why I am a 2 time X*Crown champion and outwrestle her. She is no slouch, but in a pure show of technical skill I am clearly the superior wrestler.
Santa: Well yes, but she plays dirty. Even I won’t go anywhere near her compound.
Death Trap: Understandable. But we have a bit of a respect built from Call to Arms. I’m sure once I have this plate she’ll come after me in earnest. But, I’m hoping a little Christmas spirit will go a long way to making this a standard match and I can get home to my wife in one piece.
Santa: Well, son, I can’t help you with the ancient one. But I can maybe give you a gift for entertaining this old spirit.
*He holds out his hand and DT lets a plane ticket fall from Santa’s to his own. It’s a private jet to get to America for OVN3 to support his wife. DT beams with joy. He looks up … there is nobody near him. The place is closing and everyone is leaving, the Santa is nowhere to be found.*
Death Trap: … How? … Best not to look a gift horse in the mouth. I wonder how Mistress is handling her gift excursion?
Mall Santa: AAAAGGGGH! WHY!? MY EYE! SHE SHOT IT OUT!
Sarah: ACCIDENT!
Dr. Chaos: WHAT JACKASS GAVE HER A LOADED BB GUN IN THE FIRST PLACE? Sarah, honey, it’s fine. But, uh, let’s run before someone important who actually liked this mall Santa shows up.
*They leave as MD approaches the fallen Santa with 3 pretzels.*
Mistress Discipline: Chaos? Sarah? Where did they go? … What happened to this man’s eye? Oh I hope Death Trap is having a better day than this…
*The scene opens up in the very place shown on the Hot Cocoa with Santa card. A jolly old St. Nicholas sits in a book nook in the corner of a dodecagonal building loaded with tourists, gift stands, clothes, etc. The stereotypical red hat and coat are there, as is the bushy white beard. The pants are green and the boots are brown. But the man seems a right jolly old elf. The Finnish people seem to be paying him about as much attention as any other attraction. Mild bemusement and mostly indifference. Occasionally a person will randomly go over and sit with Santa and share a cup of hot beverage; tea, cocoa, wassail, the like. Browsing the building with an impressed look is a man with a fancy Armani suit and a black bowler hat.*
Mall Santa: *sigh* Ho ho … ho … I guess. Next!
*The scene opens up in a dingy mall. There are open store outlets all over where various stores have been abandoned due to high rent and the American desire for malls having basically cratered lower than Mongo’s win percentage over farm animals. The mall Santa has on the full on red suit with big belt and toy sack next to him but the beard is sliding down his face, he looks tired and disheveled. His elf handlers are clearly keeping him in line. The Santa stage is a big sleigh shaped throne next to a gazebo and a water fountain feature which for some reason is still running, the fake reindeer are soaking wet and falling apart. There is a line a mile long of angry parents, crying babies, misbehaving toddlers, and a single pair of well dressed women and their teenage ward.*
Dr. Chaos: If I hear one more brat whine about this year’s Hess truck being out of stock, I swear to Dog I will-
Santa: SLAY THEM! Oh ho ho yes, continue to slay them my friend. Your comedy set is wonderful. I’ll be sure to pack your stocking with the finest chocolates and some nips to warm the throat and heart.
*Santa waves to a woman wearing a sweater and a skirt over festive stockings. She walks off with a grin and a handful of marshmallows. The man in the bowler hat takes notice and looks over to see what the deal is. He looks around. No line or anything. He shrugs and grabs his mug of hot cocoa with whipped cream and caramel drizzle and orders a coffee, cream and Splenda as well.*
Death Trap: When in Rome, I guess. Might as well go see what the big deal is. Besides I could use someone to talk to. My companions have been at the mall all morning. It’s getting late here. 8PM. Wonder what has them all tied up? Ah what the heck, I love talking to new people.
Dr. Chaos: I HATE TALKING TO NEW PEOPLE! Stay away from my daughter you sniveling brat! We are NOT going to be sick for the holidays! My mistress needs her full health to handle that witch!
Mall Santa: Next…
Sarah: Clooooooose!
Mistress Discipline: Not close enough Sarah, we have been here all morning! I was supposed to video call Death Trap two hours ago. And now it is after dinner there, and we have missed lunch. I am hungry, Chaos. Why do I have to wait in line with you?
Dr. Chaos: If I, your best friend, have to suffer … so do you! It’s ONLY fair. It’s in my contract! My daughter wants to see Santa and ask for something. So we wait and make her happy. I’m sure Death Trap is all tied up as well!
Santa: Ho ho ho, well hello my good sir. A man in such a fine suit is usually all tied up at the moment. What has you so alone and glum, chum?
Death Trap: Oh you speak English? Sweet. Ah I was just supposed to video call with my tag team partner, and uh … I guess wife now.. *he laughs* gonna take some getting used to.
Santa: Well congratulations! Surely a man of such distinction and positive affect has as fine a taste in women as he does in his outfit-
*He spots the bowler hat.*
Santa: *cough* Er that is to say, I’m sure your companion is out having a wonderful time!
Mistress Discipline: I AM HAVING AN AWFUL TIME, CHAOS! My blood sugar is tanking. I am going to go obtain us some pretzels!
*Mistress walks off in a huff, mumbling about how she’d rather be stuck in the same room with Donzig than be here.*
Mall Santa: *Sigh* How many more brats are there? Ugh, ok teenager. NEXT!
Sarah: MY TURN!!!
*Sarah sprints up and leaps onto the Santa’s lap.*
Mall Santa: OOOOF! Kid you could have just sat, I’m sore from being here all day. *ahem* Alright, little one. Have you been good this year?
Dr. Chaos: Better than her mother, that’s for sure *forced chuckle*
Sarah: WANT A-
Death Trap: -Red Ryder BB Gun. I tried to talk them out of it…
Santa: She’ll shoot her eye out, sir!
Death Trap: THAT’S WHAT I SAID! But she is dead set on having it and so they went to the mall to see another mall Santa. I bet they’re having a fun day and just forgot about me.
Santa: Has your day been so bad, lad?
Death Trap: Actually, no! This place is easily one of the nicest REIGN has visited. I love it here. And around Christmas, to be with a Santa is pretty cool. Still I have something to do before celebrating. And it sucks I won’t be able to be with my wife for HER match Christmas Eve.
Santa: Oh? And why is that?
Death Trap: REIGN’s show Hot Cocoa with Santa … *he looks at his company and his cup* Heh … heh that’s funny … *he shakes his head* is Christmas Eve here. Oh Violent Night 3 is in Pennsylvania, USA on the same night. I’d need a private jet and to leave early to make it there. I mean Donzig somehow got one…
Santa: What is this match?
Death Trap: Heh, I should ask you for help. Esmeralda von Krauss.
*The jolly elf recoils as fear covers his face*
Santa: Whoa whoa whoa, no no no, sir. I am not about to get involved with that demon and her mate. She is something even the angels fear. She will kill you, son. She is ancient. She is evil, corrupted by her life experience.
*DT looks confused*
Death Trap: I mean … as far as I know I’m not really on her radar of people to kill. Her husband hates me, she is indifferent. Plus she seeks the plates for power in this fed. And this match is a pure wrestling match. She wants these plates, yes. But I think she underestimates me. I handled her husband back in SWAT, I should be able to show why I am a 2 time X*Crown champion and outwrestle her. She is no slouch, but in a pure show of technical skill I am clearly the superior wrestler.
Santa: Well yes, but she plays dirty. Even I won’t go anywhere near her compound.
Death Trap: Understandable. But we have a bit of a respect built from Call to Arms. I’m sure once I have this plate she’ll come after me in earnest. But, I’m hoping a little Christmas spirit will go a long way to making this a standard match and I can get home to my wife in one piece.
Santa: Well, son, I can’t help you with the ancient one. But I can maybe give you a gift for entertaining this old spirit.
*He holds out his hand and DT lets a plane ticket fall from Santa’s to his own. It’s a private jet to get to America for OVN3 to support his wife. DT beams with joy. He looks up … there is nobody near him. The place is closing and everyone is leaving, the Santa is nowhere to be found.*
Death Trap: … How? … Best not to look a gift horse in the mouth. I wonder how Mistress is handling her gift excursion?
Mall Santa: AAAAGGGGH! WHY!? MY EYE! SHE SHOT IT OUT!
Sarah: ACCIDENT!
Dr. Chaos: WHAT JACKASS GAVE HER A LOADED BB GUN IN THE FIRST PLACE? Sarah, honey, it’s fine. But, uh, let’s run before someone important who actually liked this mall Santa shows up.
*They leave as MD approaches the fallen Santa with 3 pretzels.*
Mistress Discipline: Chaos? Sarah? Where did they go? … What happened to this man’s eye? Oh I hope Death Trap is having a better day than this…
