A Badman Rants At The World

[Frank Windsor]

The camera panned up and Frank Windsor was stood there. He had his Leopard fur coat over the top of his jeans and Bastards t-shirt; around his waist is one of the Wrestle: UK Tag Championship belts. His designer sunglasses were on his head as he looked towards the camera which was being held by his protégé Finn Corbyn. At Frank’s shoulders stood Little Ronnie and Natalia Santiago. The back drop behind them was of the flag of the United Kingdoms with the logo for the Bastards. “Okay, where do I fucking start with?” Frank started as he looked directly at the camera. “That little Indie Goth Lord Dominicus seems like the fucking logical nonce to start this little rant at doesn’t it? The love child of a fucking mortician and Katie Vicks was on the Network in some kind of rant of his own calling out the Bastards amongst others by reading from a fucking list. He has this little problem with Wrestle: UK because other than Donzig we don’t get involved in Network shows. He thinks we’re fucking cowards for staying out of shows like their Rumble with a chance to get their little X Crown Championship belt. Why would we want to be involved in a company that is on the same list as FIFA for corruption? Oh come on, unless you’ve been slipping the owners wads of fucking cash you get jobbed to anyone that they can find. Hell, the former Wrestle: UK World Champion Havok got jobbed to a fucking Bear, now that was so embarrassing for him that he still bursts into tears when he sees blokes with furry chests and backs. Now that is a fucking travesty. And anyway, who gives a fuck what that dried up badger’s cunt Dominicus thinks.” He smirked as he lifted the sunglasses off of his eyes and put them on the top of his head. “Why would we want to go there when their little squad don’t want to defend their shit on the highest rated promotion on the Network at the moment,” he said. “The Bastards have called out the Top of Class many times but the fucking cowards locked themselves away and pretended not to have heard the challenge from the greatest fucking team in professional wrestling. And then there is the current X Crown holder Dylan Black; what’s up with this cock? Is he really the man at the moment? The other guy that I remember holding that belt recently kept being embarrassed when he was the bag carrier for the Empire. Steve Awesome? Now that’s a fucking guy that re-mortgaged his mother’s home to buy a bribe to get the belt right? He was this trainee cunt with illusions of fucking grandeur and wanted to be as fucking great as the Bastards but alas the fucking Empire was another failure in wrestling history pushed by Donzig; fucking failure!” Frank unclipped the tag belt and put it over his left shoulder as he continued his rant at all those that got under his skin recently. “I mention Donzig,” Frank continued flapping his lips at the world. “What the fuck happened to you? We had an epic match in my home county where we destroyed the place BUT now I watch you at every fucking XHF event preforming like some puppet with the XHF’s owners hand up your fucking arse. When did they fucking neuter you mate? Where has the real Donzig gone and who is the fucking shell that has taken his fucking place? How the mighty have fallen.” He shook his head as he was ashamed of how they had treated someone like Donzig. “Anyway, this week’s fight between myself and Robbie is sure to be a fucking eye-opener,” Frank bellowed at the camera. “Robbie and myself have battled before and people know that he was one of the guys that actually fucking trained me who in my opinion is the real Wrestle: UK World Heavyweight Champion but got royally fucking screwed by Wesley fucking Crane last show. If Crane was any fucking Champion he would have gone straight to a camera and demand a one on one match with Robbie to legitimise that championship he holds but no the fucking coward hides behind it and won’t defend it till he steps in the ring with the man that Robbie put out of wrestling in the first place Ronnie fucking Long at Dominion in a couple of fucking months. Now that’s a real fucking coward for you. And sending your new trainee after Fowler? Now that’s going to be funny for the big man to deal with. Welcome to the big time Preston. Enjoy the fucking journey.” Frank pointed a finger at the screen and nodded. His hand dropped to his arm and he caressed the fur coat he wore. Frank cocked his head to the side, and then tilted it slightly backwards. “Okay, I digress,” he continued as his eyes narrowed. “This shouldn’t be about the disrespect that the High Roller and his lackeys have to Robbie, myself or any of the fucking Bastards; no, this should be about the match that myself and Robbie will be putting on at Wrestle: UK’s Battle of the Bastards. This will be a fucking eye opener you fuck-tards. This will either make Wrestle: UK the greatest promotion on the fucking planet or it will implode from within but to be perfectly fucking honest with you the Bastards don’t give a flying fuck what any of you think of us.” He winked at the screen as a smirk crossed his lips. “People have been trying to get hold of the Bastards trying to get us to appear on their shows,” Frank said. “But the Bastards are bigger than this industry and with the other commitments each of us has at home and abroad we need to prioritise correctly as it’s all about the fucking Bastards. Now you know what come’s next right? Yeah now fuck off!!!”