Post by Steve Awesome on Sept 28, 2023 17:56:39 GMT -5
It’s early.
You are a bit groggy and slightly irritated that you have to drive to work at this hour.
Good thing you have a podcast to listen to.
You hit a few buttons and soon enough it’s playing through your car speakers as you hit morning traffic.
“Welcome back folks you're listening to me, Howard Firm, the only podcaster who will tell it like it is!”
You get a little excited. This guy is always blunt and asks the questions and says the things you are thinking. You wonder who he is going to skewer today.
“I’m here with the quarterback back of the local football team and I was just telling him how much he sucks. I was telling him how his team will never win a championship and he should either get good or quit.”
In the background you can hear the obnoxious and punchable laugh of Steve Awesome.
“Man, you are really roasting this dude. I think he might be crying.”
Steve said with a laugh. He was clearly enjoying the brash comments when they were directed at someone else.
“Well let’s talk about you then, Steve…”
Howard said almost excited to switch over to new blood.
“On top of everything else you have going on, you are also about to compete in the End of Days tournament. How are you feeling heading into such a big match?”
“I’m feeling great, Howard.”
Steve said quickly, the usual confidence and charm in his voice.
“I’ve won End of Days once before, you know. I’m feeling really confident that I can win.”
“Oh really?”
Howard said in a sing-songy type of way. You knew Howard was ready to bite.
“You feel confident? If you ask me, I’d be feeling scared and anxious if it were my last chance at the X-Crown.”
Howard dangled the bait. Steve lets his guard down a bit and immediately takes it.
“What do you mean, last chance?”
Steve said, his voice a little more quiet than before.
“Well I just mean, you’ve been trying to regain the XCrown title for the whole year now and each time you’ve come up short…”
“Okay? And!?
Steve interrupted. You can hear him get more annoyed as he spoke.
I don’t see how it’s my last chance or anything. I could get another chance.
“Can you?”
“I just wonder how many more chances you really have? Or even deserve!? I mean how many times do you have to fail before you realize you're a failure? How many times do you think feds are going to send you to fight for that Crown when you keep coming back as a loser?
“Well I mean it’s not-“
Steve said with a mumble. Almost under his breath. The shock jock doesn’t hear a thing and keeps going at his usual pace.
“Let’s look at the facts here. REIGN sent you in January and you failed. Now REIGN doesn’t even exist. HardKore World sent you to Overheated and you came back empty handed. Now the Valentines are sending Alexander Von Blankenship instead of you.”
“Well that’s different, I just-“
Steve tried to defend himself but there was just no passion in his argument. Howard Firm continued to walk all over him.
“I just think we’re starting to see the part of your career where it all starts to go downhill. I think if you don’t win End of Days, if you don’t get through those four matches and then win the XCrown at the pay per view, I think the XCrown wielding Steve Awesome as we know him will be dead.”
“No-“
“No more title shots. No more fancy Fed representation. No more creative freedom. No more top guy status. Face of the Franchise?”
You could hear Steve gasp as the radio host brought up his namesake.
“More like Face of the Tri-State area.”
Steve gulped.
Click.
Steve Awesome pounded the speaker playing the podcast and it shuts off and falls off the table.
“Ahh what the fuck does he know!?”
Steve crossed his arms and glared. He shook his head as he thought about what Howard Firm said to him all over again.
“Absolute bullshit is what it is.”
Steve said as his fists clenched. He started pacing back and forth in his attic where he was currently.
“I can win End of Days. I can win the XCrown title again.”
He sighs.
“This is -not- my last chance.”
He starts to breathe heavily as he continues to pace.
“I can do this! I can do this!…I gotta do this. This has gotta be the one.”
He pulls off his sunglasses and rubs the bridge of his nose. Suddenly something caught his eye. Something he hadn’t thought about since Night of Champions.
He ran over to the box that contained it and quickly pulled it out.
It was the nCw World Championship.
The forbidden ticket to the promised land.
THE HARDKORE REALITY OF STEVE AWESOME
END OF DAYS SPECIAL 1: The Backup Plan
Steve’s reflection gazed back at him from the centerpiece of the nCw World Title.
It would be so simple.
Cash in this title belt from a dead company.
Win the XCrown title for a third time.
No global tournament.
No nonsense multi-man match.
So why hasn’t he done it yet?
Steve sighed and looked at himself in the reflection.
He knew he couldn’t.
His family would be angry.
He’s had his own qualms about pulling the trigger in the past.
And he could still hear the words of Leonard Fox echoing in his mind.
….But whatever you do, don’t let the nCw title and the company’s legacy become just another asterisk for the XHF XCrown title. It’s fine for other world titles that nobody cares about, but the nCw legacy was something special. I don’t want our family to lose that….
Steve closed his eyes tight to try and fight the urge.
He had to become XCrown Champion again.
He needed to become champion again.
Leonard Fox’s words still echoed in his mind.
“What are you doing with that belt Steve?”
Wait a minute…
Steve opened his eyes and when he looked into the belt he saw the reflection of Leonard Fox standing behind him!
Steve spun around quickly and sure enough there he was. The former owner of New Championship Wrestling. An eighty plus year old man who was currently suffering from dementia in hospice care.
Naturally all Steve could do in response was scream and quickly hide the title behind his back.
“LEONARD! What are you doing here!? Did you die!? Are you a ghost!?”
Leonard throws his head back in laughter and shook his head.
“No. I didn’t die. I’m not a ghost.”
Steve was still confused but he took that as good news and sighed in relief.
“I’m just a manifestation of your anxiety, guilt, and desperation.”
Steve nodded his head at the explanation.
“Ah. So I’ve gone crazy?”
Leonard nodded.
“Yup.”
Steve handled it well all things considered.
“Alright cool. I figured it would happen eventually.”
Awkward pause as they both agree.
“So listen, I know you want to cash in that ncw title even though you know it’s going to make everyone mad at you. But I say do it…”
“Yeah but you said not to!”
Leonard shook his head.
“No. Remember? I’m not actually Leonard Fox. I’m just a figment of your crazy ass imagination. I say cash in the belt. Ncw is never coming back. Seventy percent of the roster are retired and moved on. Either in the XHF vault or a footnote on your roster application, it’s an asterisk somewhere. Plus, real Leonard said it in a moment of clarity that no one else heard but you.”
Steve pulls the belt from behind his back and looks at it again.
“But I think you’d be selling yourself short if you did that now. You are a legend in this business, Steve. A multi time world champion. A multi time XCrown champion. You’ve been the reigning and defending Hardcore Champion for damn near the whole year so far. Come on man, you can beat these opponents.”
A bashful smile grows on Steve’s face and he waves off the compliment.
“Awh, you're just saying that because you're my hallucination.”
“You definitely have the first match in the bag. It’s just two ladies that already want you on top of them, and your little sidekick in the anointed. You can take them.”
Steve let’s the ncw title fall to one side as he holds it by the strap.
“I mean….you're probably right. Probably wouldn’t even be that hard for me to do.”
Leonard points at Steve and smiles.
“Of course I’m right! And I’ll be there to coach you through it. In spirit of course since I’m not real.”
“You will?”
Leonard nods his head and drapes his arm around Steve.
“Sure I will. We can start right now with some coach style insight. First off you got AVB. You’ve pretty much taught this little geek everything he knows because we all know his daddy was never around to teach him anything. When you get to Salt Lake City, show him that you haven’t taught him everything you know and throw him off his game plan. He may be a stablemate of yours but always keep your eye on him.”
Leonard uses two fingers to point to each of his eyes.
“Once a rat boy, always a rat boy.”
Leonard nods.
“EVK, she likes to get stabby with needles and daggers. She always threatens to do something worse then Zoran, but she winds up being a spiders bite compared to that old bastard. You can squash her easily as you’ve shown before, you just gotta be ready to dodge her strikes.”
Steve listened as Leonard finished up his rundown.
“And I don’t know much about Kasper Van Zant. She’s new. But as far as I can tell she is willing to “lay down for you” in more ways than one. So maybe we can use that to our advantage?”
Steve rubs his chin as he considers what Leonard had just said.
“Hmm, yeah that sounds easy enough.”
Leonard nods his head, takes the belt from Steve and puts it away for him.
“That’s right. You don’t need to do something you're gonna regret for the rest of your life, because you are going to win End of Days for a second time and go on to win the XCrown title for a third time. And I’m going to coach you through it. Now let’s hit the gym and go over some strategies.”
Fade.
STEVE AWESOME
Has been learning acoustic guitar
The promo opens as Steve Awesome butchers his way through Bryan Adam’s “Everything I Do”
“You can't tell me it's not worth trying for”
Steve sings, “serenading” a picture of the XCrown Championship on Bloodied Fox’s waist but his head is crossed out and vandalized.
“Just can't help it, there's nothing I want more
Oh, I would fight for you, yeah, I'd lie for you
Walk the wire for you, yeah, I'd die for you”
He plays softer and reaches out to the picture to caress it.
“You know it's true
Everything I do
I do for you”
Steve took a deep sigh of relief and set the guitar down.
“Just a little diddy that I wanted to play for everyone. I think it paints a nice picture about how I feel and what I’m willing to do to win that XCrown again. I’d literally DIE to become XCrown champion. And after I died, I’d get up and raise that title over my head.”
He stopped as soon as he realized that didn’t make sense. He gets annoyed and shrugs it off.
“Whatever, I’ll work out the logistics of that later, but you get the point.”
He runs a palm through his hair.
“I don’t think I need to explain the fact that I “need” to win that crown again. Or my many reasons why. I “needed” to win the belt again back at Night of Champions. Hell, I “needed” to win the XCrown title again all the way back in January at Supremacy.”
His fists clenched a bit and his body shook.
“I’m way past “needing it” at this point.”
He took a step forward.
“So here is how it’s going to go down. There can only be two winners that can advance. And one of those winners is going to be me.”
He smirks.
“Don’t try to argue, I’ve already called dibs on it and you can’t go against that.”
He crossed his arms.
“The rest of you? I guess you just fight amongst yourselves? Maybe the second winner will be Esmeralda Von Krauss?”
Steve chuckled a bit at the thought.
“That crazy broad wanted me to make her my third baby mama but I said no and for good reason. EVK doesn’t have the fallopian tubes strong enough to have my child. She’s not woman enough to join my harem of ex wives and girlfriends that I pay child support too. Just like EVK isn’t woman enough to beat me in the middle of the ring, so you better hope for second place….and maybe try getting a cat or something you lonely creeper.
He sneers and then moves on with the promo.
“Or maybe the second winner will be Kasper Van Zant? According to the rumor mill she has a crush on me? Heh, I don’t blame her.”
He smirks.
“Well here’s the tip, Kasp.”
One handed crotch chop.
“I like my girls to be submissive.”
He pulls his sunglasses down and peers over the rim.
“So when I get you from behind and lock it in, be sure to tap out as quickly as you can. Chat soon and heart.”
He blows a quick kiss, smirks and continues.
“Then there is Alexander von Blankenship.”
Steve glares.
“My buddy. My partner in crime. My number two man.”
He smiles.
“Listen bro, I think I’ve known you long enough to know what you were trying to say in your promo. But all I really need for you to be saying right now is that when we get to Utah for this match you are going to shut your mouth, and know your role.”
He points aggressively into the camera but then swaps back to a grin.
“And that’s right next to me as the very clear and obvious second winner of this match.
Steve raises a fist and grins.
“Anointed forever, right brother?”
He chuckles and points into the camera.
“But if you try to screw me, I’ll beat you like I did your daddy.”
He nods.
“At the Tapout show I have no doubt in my mind that I’m advancing in the tournament with a performance that shows how bad I want to win.”
“The only question is….”
He flashed that confident grin.
“Which one of you is coming with me?”
Crotch Chop
Fade.
You are a bit groggy and slightly irritated that you have to drive to work at this hour.
Good thing you have a podcast to listen to.
You hit a few buttons and soon enough it’s playing through your car speakers as you hit morning traffic.
“Welcome back folks you're listening to me, Howard Firm, the only podcaster who will tell it like it is!”
You get a little excited. This guy is always blunt and asks the questions and says the things you are thinking. You wonder who he is going to skewer today.
“I’m here with the quarterback back of the local football team and I was just telling him how much he sucks. I was telling him how his team will never win a championship and he should either get good or quit.”
In the background you can hear the obnoxious and punchable laugh of Steve Awesome.
“Man, you are really roasting this dude. I think he might be crying.”
Steve said with a laugh. He was clearly enjoying the brash comments when they were directed at someone else.
“Well let’s talk about you then, Steve…”
Howard said almost excited to switch over to new blood.
“On top of everything else you have going on, you are also about to compete in the End of Days tournament. How are you feeling heading into such a big match?”
“I’m feeling great, Howard.”
Steve said quickly, the usual confidence and charm in his voice.
“I’ve won End of Days once before, you know. I’m feeling really confident that I can win.”
“Oh really?”
Howard said in a sing-songy type of way. You knew Howard was ready to bite.
“You feel confident? If you ask me, I’d be feeling scared and anxious if it were my last chance at the X-Crown.”
Howard dangled the bait. Steve lets his guard down a bit and immediately takes it.
“What do you mean, last chance?”
Steve said, his voice a little more quiet than before.
“Well I just mean, you’ve been trying to regain the XCrown title for the whole year now and each time you’ve come up short…”
“Okay? And!?
Steve interrupted. You can hear him get more annoyed as he spoke.
I don’t see how it’s my last chance or anything. I could get another chance.
“Can you?”
“I just wonder how many more chances you really have? Or even deserve!? I mean how many times do you have to fail before you realize you're a failure? How many times do you think feds are going to send you to fight for that Crown when you keep coming back as a loser?
“Well I mean it’s not-“
Steve said with a mumble. Almost under his breath. The shock jock doesn’t hear a thing and keeps going at his usual pace.
“Let’s look at the facts here. REIGN sent you in January and you failed. Now REIGN doesn’t even exist. HardKore World sent you to Overheated and you came back empty handed. Now the Valentines are sending Alexander Von Blankenship instead of you.”
“Well that’s different, I just-“
Steve tried to defend himself but there was just no passion in his argument. Howard Firm continued to walk all over him.
“I just think we’re starting to see the part of your career where it all starts to go downhill. I think if you don’t win End of Days, if you don’t get through those four matches and then win the XCrown at the pay per view, I think the XCrown wielding Steve Awesome as we know him will be dead.”
“No-“
“No more title shots. No more fancy Fed representation. No more creative freedom. No more top guy status. Face of the Franchise?”
You could hear Steve gasp as the radio host brought up his namesake.
“More like Face of the Tri-State area.”
Steve gulped.
Click.
Steve Awesome pounded the speaker playing the podcast and it shuts off and falls off the table.
“Ahh what the fuck does he know!?”
Steve crossed his arms and glared. He shook his head as he thought about what Howard Firm said to him all over again.
“Absolute bullshit is what it is.”
Steve said as his fists clenched. He started pacing back and forth in his attic where he was currently.
“I can win End of Days. I can win the XCrown title again.”
He sighs.
“This is -not- my last chance.”
He starts to breathe heavily as he continues to pace.
“I can do this! I can do this!…I gotta do this. This has gotta be the one.”
He pulls off his sunglasses and rubs the bridge of his nose. Suddenly something caught his eye. Something he hadn’t thought about since Night of Champions.
He ran over to the box that contained it and quickly pulled it out.
It was the nCw World Championship.
The forbidden ticket to the promised land.
THE HARDKORE REALITY OF STEVE AWESOME
END OF DAYS SPECIAL 1: The Backup Plan
Steve’s reflection gazed back at him from the centerpiece of the nCw World Title.
It would be so simple.
Cash in this title belt from a dead company.
Win the XCrown title for a third time.
No global tournament.
No nonsense multi-man match.
So why hasn’t he done it yet?
Steve sighed and looked at himself in the reflection.
He knew he couldn’t.
His family would be angry.
He’s had his own qualms about pulling the trigger in the past.
And he could still hear the words of Leonard Fox echoing in his mind.
….But whatever you do, don’t let the nCw title and the company’s legacy become just another asterisk for the XHF XCrown title. It’s fine for other world titles that nobody cares about, but the nCw legacy was something special. I don’t want our family to lose that….
Steve closed his eyes tight to try and fight the urge.
He had to become XCrown Champion again.
He needed to become champion again.
Leonard Fox’s words still echoed in his mind.
“What are you doing with that belt Steve?”
Wait a minute…
Steve opened his eyes and when he looked into the belt he saw the reflection of Leonard Fox standing behind him!
Steve spun around quickly and sure enough there he was. The former owner of New Championship Wrestling. An eighty plus year old man who was currently suffering from dementia in hospice care.
Naturally all Steve could do in response was scream and quickly hide the title behind his back.
“LEONARD! What are you doing here!? Did you die!? Are you a ghost!?”
Leonard throws his head back in laughter and shook his head.
“No. I didn’t die. I’m not a ghost.”
Steve was still confused but he took that as good news and sighed in relief.
“I’m just a manifestation of your anxiety, guilt, and desperation.”
Steve nodded his head at the explanation.
“Ah. So I’ve gone crazy?”
Leonard nodded.
“Yup.”
Steve handled it well all things considered.
“Alright cool. I figured it would happen eventually.”
Awkward pause as they both agree.
“So listen, I know you want to cash in that ncw title even though you know it’s going to make everyone mad at you. But I say do it…”
“Yeah but you said not to!”
Leonard shook his head.
“No. Remember? I’m not actually Leonard Fox. I’m just a figment of your crazy ass imagination. I say cash in the belt. Ncw is never coming back. Seventy percent of the roster are retired and moved on. Either in the XHF vault or a footnote on your roster application, it’s an asterisk somewhere. Plus, real Leonard said it in a moment of clarity that no one else heard but you.”
Steve pulls the belt from behind his back and looks at it again.
“But I think you’d be selling yourself short if you did that now. You are a legend in this business, Steve. A multi time world champion. A multi time XCrown champion. You’ve been the reigning and defending Hardcore Champion for damn near the whole year so far. Come on man, you can beat these opponents.”
A bashful smile grows on Steve’s face and he waves off the compliment.
“Awh, you're just saying that because you're my hallucination.”
“You definitely have the first match in the bag. It’s just two ladies that already want you on top of them, and your little sidekick in the anointed. You can take them.”
Steve let’s the ncw title fall to one side as he holds it by the strap.
“I mean….you're probably right. Probably wouldn’t even be that hard for me to do.”
Leonard points at Steve and smiles.
“Of course I’m right! And I’ll be there to coach you through it. In spirit of course since I’m not real.”
“You will?”
Leonard nods his head and drapes his arm around Steve.
“Sure I will. We can start right now with some coach style insight. First off you got AVB. You’ve pretty much taught this little geek everything he knows because we all know his daddy was never around to teach him anything. When you get to Salt Lake City, show him that you haven’t taught him everything you know and throw him off his game plan. He may be a stablemate of yours but always keep your eye on him.”
Leonard uses two fingers to point to each of his eyes.
“Once a rat boy, always a rat boy.”
Leonard nods.
“EVK, she likes to get stabby with needles and daggers. She always threatens to do something worse then Zoran, but she winds up being a spiders bite compared to that old bastard. You can squash her easily as you’ve shown before, you just gotta be ready to dodge her strikes.”
Steve listened as Leonard finished up his rundown.
“And I don’t know much about Kasper Van Zant. She’s new. But as far as I can tell she is willing to “lay down for you” in more ways than one. So maybe we can use that to our advantage?”
Steve rubs his chin as he considers what Leonard had just said.
“Hmm, yeah that sounds easy enough.”
Leonard nods his head, takes the belt from Steve and puts it away for him.
“That’s right. You don’t need to do something you're gonna regret for the rest of your life, because you are going to win End of Days for a second time and go on to win the XCrown title for a third time. And I’m going to coach you through it. Now let’s hit the gym and go over some strategies.”
Fade.
STEVE AWESOME
Has been learning acoustic guitar
The promo opens as Steve Awesome butchers his way through Bryan Adam’s “Everything I Do”
“You can't tell me it's not worth trying for”
Steve sings, “serenading” a picture of the XCrown Championship on Bloodied Fox’s waist but his head is crossed out and vandalized.
“Just can't help it, there's nothing I want more
Oh, I would fight for you, yeah, I'd lie for you
Walk the wire for you, yeah, I'd die for you”
He plays softer and reaches out to the picture to caress it.
“You know it's true
Everything I do
I do for you”
Steve took a deep sigh of relief and set the guitar down.
“Just a little diddy that I wanted to play for everyone. I think it paints a nice picture about how I feel and what I’m willing to do to win that XCrown again. I’d literally DIE to become XCrown champion. And after I died, I’d get up and raise that title over my head.”
He stopped as soon as he realized that didn’t make sense. He gets annoyed and shrugs it off.
“Whatever, I’ll work out the logistics of that later, but you get the point.”
He runs a palm through his hair.
“I don’t think I need to explain the fact that I “need” to win that crown again. Or my many reasons why. I “needed” to win the belt again back at Night of Champions. Hell, I “needed” to win the XCrown title again all the way back in January at Supremacy.”
His fists clenched a bit and his body shook.
“I’m way past “needing it” at this point.”
He took a step forward.
“So here is how it’s going to go down. There can only be two winners that can advance. And one of those winners is going to be me.”
He smirks.
“Don’t try to argue, I’ve already called dibs on it and you can’t go against that.”
He crossed his arms.
“The rest of you? I guess you just fight amongst yourselves? Maybe the second winner will be Esmeralda Von Krauss?”
Steve chuckled a bit at the thought.
“That crazy broad wanted me to make her my third baby mama but I said no and for good reason. EVK doesn’t have the fallopian tubes strong enough to have my child. She’s not woman enough to join my harem of ex wives and girlfriends that I pay child support too. Just like EVK isn’t woman enough to beat me in the middle of the ring, so you better hope for second place….and maybe try getting a cat or something you lonely creeper.
He sneers and then moves on with the promo.
“Or maybe the second winner will be Kasper Van Zant? According to the rumor mill she has a crush on me? Heh, I don’t blame her.”
He smirks.
“Well here’s the tip, Kasp.”
One handed crotch chop.
“I like my girls to be submissive.”
He pulls his sunglasses down and peers over the rim.
“So when I get you from behind and lock it in, be sure to tap out as quickly as you can. Chat soon and heart.”
He blows a quick kiss, smirks and continues.
“Then there is Alexander von Blankenship.”
Steve glares.
“My buddy. My partner in crime. My number two man.”
He smiles.
“Listen bro, I think I’ve known you long enough to know what you were trying to say in your promo. But all I really need for you to be saying right now is that when we get to Utah for this match you are going to shut your mouth, and know your role.”
He points aggressively into the camera but then swaps back to a grin.
“And that’s right next to me as the very clear and obvious second winner of this match.
Steve raises a fist and grins.
“Anointed forever, right brother?”
He chuckles and points into the camera.
“But if you try to screw me, I’ll beat you like I did your daddy.”
He nods.
“At the Tapout show I have no doubt in my mind that I’m advancing in the tournament with a performance that shows how bad I want to win.”
“The only question is….”
He flashed that confident grin.
“Which one of you is coming with me?”
Crotch Chop
Fade.
