Predictions of the Future (Marmaduke Matters JHC)
Oct 25, 2023 10:27:25 GMT -5
Mongo the Destroyer, Dave D-Flipz, and 2 more like this
Post by terras on Oct 25, 2023 10:27:25 GMT -5
The Bewitching Gnat is one of the lesser watering holes on the City of Bones' rough outskirts. Constructed before the host got into a non-organic waste diet, the front door is made of fish carcasses, it can barely shut, and frequently lets in grit from the nearby Agonizing Sands desert. Watch where you step, as those grains are like lava. Medical researchers - formerly paramedics that checked on the Dread Lord after matches - pay top shell for test subjects to frequent the back booths, looking to discover rare fungal growths. For lack of funds, The Murder Hobo Express are regulars at this tavern, and are currently commiserating over frothy mugs of albino alligator tears.
Tsingtao Woman: I'm just saying, this bar is in the western desert part of town. Albino alligators are located in the North. Where are they getting the "fresh tears" from? Make mine Tsingtao.
There sure are a lot of beer mascots located in this dracolich hell. As the Tsingtao plug prompts a number of cries that it tastes like piss, Marmaduke Matters turns from the group to count flowers on the table.
Hooded Scratch: What are you doing, Duke?
Marmaduke Matters: Before I was eaten, Bones asked me a question about how many plants were in his office. Whenever I come across them here, I add the number to the tally...
Hooded Scratch: Sounds like collectibles. My child was into sandbox video games...
Marmaduke Matters: I just can't help but think if I get the number right, we'll all be transported out of here.
Hooded Scratch: I've seen stranger happenings...
Marmaduke Matters (finishing the count, realizes how sombre Scratch has gotten at the mention of his offspring): We'll get you back to your family soon. That silver snipe is as good as ours...
The Silver Snipe - an animal so rare that it may create an exit from the hated Boneverse, and their current target With Lili not giving up the Crystal Skull, the possibly imaginary creature is the group's next best shot at exiting this nightmare. If only someone could find it... such thoughts are cut short.
RRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRR-
As the Mecha Rankor bursts through the Bewitching Gnat's ceiling.
Tsingtao Woman: Aaaaaaa-
The Chinese beer mascot is the first to be eaten. If the Mecha Rankor could speak in human, it would tell you she went down smooth. The Wizard of Bones pet was struck down by the glorious return of King Edmund IV, only for the beast to be rebuilt with Sky Net technology - and is now dead set on consuming our heroic party out of revenge.
#CRASH#
The roof starts to completely collapse under the weight of the cyborg monster - with Agonizing Sands spilling in. Even the fungus in the corner is screaming in terror. Before the Rankor can feast on the rest of the party, the Siammese Twin Blue Whale bones that make up the tavern's foundation crumble away, causing the bar to collapse down into a river of blood maggots.
#SPLASH#
An emaciated arm shoots out of Scratch's hood, covering Marmaduke's eyes to protect them from the worms. Darkness. Blood. So much blood. Can barely swim, let alone breath.
Darkness.
When the orange fungus glows strongly enough to simulate daylight, Marmaduke slowly comes too. A figure stands over him. Did the kindly Scratch make it as well?
Stabbing pain.
Marmaduke wakes up to find himself alongside a shallow stream of blood maggots - having been fished out by Victoria Bitters Boy, who is currently trying to take a bite out of Duke's arm.
Marmaduke Matters: Stop that!
Grabbing a mercury heavy cuddlefish bone, Marmaduke strikes the Australian beer mascot over the head. Victoria stops, then tries to resort to cannibalism again, only to be deterred by another cuddlefish strike.
Victoria Bitters Boy: oh... thank goodness you made it... you had drowned... I was... trying to perform mouth to mouth resuscitation.
Double M looks down at teeth marks on his forearm.
Victoria Bitter Boy (toothy grin): My eyesight isn't what it used to be.
Marmaduke Matters: I'm sure... did anyone else wash up?
Victoria Bitters Boy: A few pieces floated past... but nothing appetizi- breathing.
Damn. They had been doing so well too. Matters hopes the rest of his adventure party, no, friends are alright. At least Pilgrim had refused to enter the "den of iniquity" so HWP will have survived. But where to find them? Where to start? Reaching into his fanny pack, Marmaduke pulls out a pack of playing cards. A ziplock bag having protected the cards from the blood.
Victoria Bitters Boy: Ah poker.... but what will we play for?
Noticing the Australian beer hawker turned cannibal licking his lips like a cutrate Party City Gollum, Marmaduke keeps the heavy metal poisoned cuddelfish bone at the ready.
Marmaduke Matters: During my wrestling days, I had a psychic gimmick. Maybe I can use some of that hocus pocus to track down the Silver Snipe...
Victoria Bitters Boy: But it was just an act right? Don't believe your own hype man, marking for yourself is pathetic!
Marmaduke Matters: Oh, it was all slight of hand and cold reads - but there's something about this place, that makes me believe in more than tricks. So even if it's nonsense... I have to try.
Double M starts to throw down cards for a reading.
Marmature Matters: At this point, I'm just looking for my friends... I know they are looking for the Silver Snipe. If I can find it, I'll find them.
Duke starts to deal cards faster, and move them around, until his divination reveals...
Victoria Bitters Boy: Full House.
Damn.
Victoria Bitters Boy: You know, if you're just trying to go on a vision quest - I have some airplane glue we can sniff?
That is a kind offer, but Duke wants to escape Bones with as many braincells as possible.
Marmaduke Matters: Thanks, but-
Victoria Bitters Boy: Actually you can get the same high from your bag-
Picking up the ziplock bag, Victoria Bitters Boy pulls it over Double M's head before he can protest.
Victoria Bitters Boy: Didn't see that coming did you? Some psychic-
The unpleasant bear mascot gets cracked on the side of the head with the cuddlefish bone, quickly losing consciousness. Marmaduke starts to remove the plastic bag, but then starts to see something for the oxygen deprivation... a vision...
To catch the Silver Snipe...
To reunite with his friends...
All roads lead to...........................
Tsingtao Woman: I'm just saying, this bar is in the western desert part of town. Albino alligators are located in the North. Where are they getting the "fresh tears" from? Make mine Tsingtao.
There sure are a lot of beer mascots located in this dracolich hell. As the Tsingtao plug prompts a number of cries that it tastes like piss, Marmaduke Matters turns from the group to count flowers on the table.
Hooded Scratch: What are you doing, Duke?
Marmaduke Matters: Before I was eaten, Bones asked me a question about how many plants were in his office. Whenever I come across them here, I add the number to the tally...
Hooded Scratch: Sounds like collectibles. My child was into sandbox video games...
Marmaduke Matters: I just can't help but think if I get the number right, we'll all be transported out of here.
Hooded Scratch: I've seen stranger happenings...
Marmaduke Matters (finishing the count, realizes how sombre Scratch has gotten at the mention of his offspring): We'll get you back to your family soon. That silver snipe is as good as ours...
The Silver Snipe - an animal so rare that it may create an exit from the hated Boneverse, and their current target With Lili not giving up the Crystal Skull, the possibly imaginary creature is the group's next best shot at exiting this nightmare. If only someone could find it... such thoughts are cut short.
RRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRR-
As the Mecha Rankor bursts through the Bewitching Gnat's ceiling.
Tsingtao Woman: Aaaaaaa-
The Chinese beer mascot is the first to be eaten. If the Mecha Rankor could speak in human, it would tell you she went down smooth. The Wizard of Bones pet was struck down by the glorious return of King Edmund IV, only for the beast to be rebuilt with Sky Net technology - and is now dead set on consuming our heroic party out of revenge.
#CRASH#
The roof starts to completely collapse under the weight of the cyborg monster - with Agonizing Sands spilling in. Even the fungus in the corner is screaming in terror. Before the Rankor can feast on the rest of the party, the Siammese Twin Blue Whale bones that make up the tavern's foundation crumble away, causing the bar to collapse down into a river of blood maggots.
#SPLASH#
An emaciated arm shoots out of Scratch's hood, covering Marmaduke's eyes to protect them from the worms. Darkness. Blood. So much blood. Can barely swim, let alone breath.
Darkness.
When the orange fungus glows strongly enough to simulate daylight, Marmaduke slowly comes too. A figure stands over him. Did the kindly Scratch make it as well?
Stabbing pain.
Marmaduke wakes up to find himself alongside a shallow stream of blood maggots - having been fished out by Victoria Bitters Boy, who is currently trying to take a bite out of Duke's arm.
Marmaduke Matters: Stop that!
Grabbing a mercury heavy cuddlefish bone, Marmaduke strikes the Australian beer mascot over the head. Victoria stops, then tries to resort to cannibalism again, only to be deterred by another cuddlefish strike.
Victoria Bitters Boy: oh... thank goodness you made it... you had drowned... I was... trying to perform mouth to mouth resuscitation.
Double M looks down at teeth marks on his forearm.
Victoria Bitter Boy (toothy grin): My eyesight isn't what it used to be.
Marmaduke Matters: I'm sure... did anyone else wash up?
Victoria Bitters Boy: A few pieces floated past... but nothing appetizi- breathing.
Damn. They had been doing so well too. Matters hopes the rest of his adventure party, no, friends are alright. At least Pilgrim had refused to enter the "den of iniquity" so HWP will have survived. But where to find them? Where to start? Reaching into his fanny pack, Marmaduke pulls out a pack of playing cards. A ziplock bag having protected the cards from the blood.
Victoria Bitters Boy: Ah poker.... but what will we play for?
Noticing the Australian beer hawker turned cannibal licking his lips like a cutrate Party City Gollum, Marmaduke keeps the heavy metal poisoned cuddelfish bone at the ready.
Marmaduke Matters: During my wrestling days, I had a psychic gimmick. Maybe I can use some of that hocus pocus to track down the Silver Snipe...
Victoria Bitters Boy: But it was just an act right? Don't believe your own hype man, marking for yourself is pathetic!
Marmaduke Matters: Oh, it was all slight of hand and cold reads - but there's something about this place, that makes me believe in more than tricks. So even if it's nonsense... I have to try.
Double M starts to throw down cards for a reading.
Marmature Matters: At this point, I'm just looking for my friends... I know they are looking for the Silver Snipe. If I can find it, I'll find them.
Duke starts to deal cards faster, and move them around, until his divination reveals...
Victoria Bitters Boy: Full House.
Damn.
Victoria Bitters Boy: You know, if you're just trying to go on a vision quest - I have some airplane glue we can sniff?
That is a kind offer, but Duke wants to escape Bones with as many braincells as possible.
Marmaduke Matters: Thanks, but-
Victoria Bitters Boy: Actually you can get the same high from your bag-
Picking up the ziplock bag, Victoria Bitters Boy pulls it over Double M's head before he can protest.
Victoria Bitters Boy: Didn't see that coming did you? Some psychic-
The unpleasant bear mascot gets cracked on the side of the head with the cuddlefish bone, quickly losing consciousness. Marmaduke starts to remove the plastic bag, but then starts to see something for the oxygen deprivation... a vision...
To catch the Silver Snipe...
To reunite with his friends...
All roads lead to...........................