The House Wins! [FML 4 Epcot Mafia]
Nov 21, 2023 2:57:36 GMT -5
Visit Neom and Kasper Van Slam like this
Post by flo on Nov 21, 2023 2:57:36 GMT -5
The Battle of Britain.
A career high that shut up all the doubters, and put Florida Man on the map as scary talent... and not just scary. Yet the evening was tainted, when the glorious Epcot Mafia were robbed of their tag team championships by the loathsome High Roller's Club. Preston Reese would later cover the Roller's tab - but the damage was done. It was clear to everyone that if Florida Man hadn't exhausted himself in the BoB match, and come into the tag defense in better condition - the result might have been very different. Talk about the two Martys... Florida Man certainly didn't mean to turn Marty Donovan into the Marty Janetty of their celebrated team! Accidentally relegating a man he considers a brother to a New Rocker existence, while going onto singles glory. Even if that is what happened... Florida Man needs to set this right. At the very least the Sunshine State Stud needs to throw a lavish party in honour of their Revolution win.... and the only way to do that properly is to win back the tag titles.
Gazoo:
But in a cage, Flo? You don't do well behind bars. Remember your teens? And twenties?
Florida Man:
I don't remember sitting down. No, cage be damned. My understanding is we're taking on Rage and Cage inside a cage... that is one too many cages. So maybe me and Marty just have to double team Rage inside his partner? Oh yeah! We can beat the High Rollers... I just have to become a better gambler than them.
Sitting in the middle of a living room, the commonwealth champion and his faithful painted dwarf attorney are playing cards.
Florida Man (throws down way too many cards):
Read it and weep - TWO FULL HOUSES.
Proud of himself, FML reaches in to collect the hoard - which mostly seems to be expired medicine that may have been stolen from a local retirement community. So many estrogen pills.
Gazoo:
Not so fast, Flo....
The dwarf produces...
Gazoo:
Two full houses, a rules for playing poker, and three jokers!
Florida Man:
Dang it. How do you do it, Gaz?
Chuckling, the dwarf collects their wager. He'll lactate well tonight. Before the two can get their next round going, the front door opens.
"Ollie, you hom-"
Marty Donovan walks into his den to discover the rest of the Epcot Mafia decked out in only their Star Trek themed boxers, smoking a comedic amount of cigars, and definitely not using coasters.
Marty Donovan:
Now... I know I didn't give you keys.
Florida Man (snort):
(pointing a thumb at their host) You hear this guy? What a kidder!
Gazoo slaps his knees at the thought.
Florida Man:
Like we'd need keys?
Move over Barry Burton, because these Floridians are the MASTERS of UNLOCKING. Keys. If Florida Man wasn't wearing a mask, there would be tears streaming down his face. As it stands, FML just wipes away the crocodile tears. Wait. Did the temperature of the room just go up? Marty isn't laughing. Is he upset? More than the home invasion, and destruction of property, wearing Paramount mercy in Casa Donovan is a capital offence, and Disney's Own seems to be visibly shaken. Spectacularly self-absorbed, Florida Man just assumes Marty's surly disposition is over the tag title loss.
Florida Man:
Marty. I owe you an apology. Here I am winning all these big singles matches, and you probably think I sold our team out. I didn't. This is important to me. It's the MOST important thing to me. Why I had literally spent months planning this hella kickass party to celebrate our tag title win. Tell 'em, Gaz.
Gazoo:
So much ass.
Florida Man:
I had a lot of resources tied up in that party... which sort of got flushed when we lost the titles. Now I know what you're thinking "God dang, that would have been the best celebration ever, I bet you had pizza, and girls, and a piñata, and punch, and pie, and everything, how can we go on without kicking it hard? Should we just form a suicide pact?" WHOA! Put the gun away, Marty.... because I PROMISE we are going to have a DO OVER! We just need to win back our straps, and I have found a way to throw it again. We will party rock!
Disney's Own finds it hard enough tagging with Florida Man, let alone spending time with him outside of work - and is less than enthusiastic.
Marty Donovan:
...That's alright.
Florida Man:
Thanks for putting on a brave face, but we WILL have this celebration - even if I have to choke out Rage inside Cage's bowels.
...Jesus.
Gazoo:
How did you raise the money, Flo?
Florida Man (waving hand around):
I put a mortgage on the house.
Gazoo:
Damn Flo, that is going to be one hell of a party!
Hold on...
Marty Donovan:
Wait... this is my house!
Florida Man (nodding enthusiastically):
It was at a really good interest rate.
Marty Donovan (triple take):
That's not the point!
Gazoo (shooting back some expired estrogen):
....You're taking this very well Mister Donovan.... I wouldn't let Flo refinance MY home. ....Math is not his strong point.
This can't be happening.
Marty Donovan:
How did the bank even let you-
Florida Man:
I told them we were best friends.
Marty Donovan:
....
Florida Man:
At first they were a little lame about it, but they understand "bros before security questions."
This is real.
Marty Donovan:
CHRIST! YOU ALWAYS DO THIS!
Florida Man (seeming proud):
We have an ice sculpture...
Marty Donovan (putting on coat):
I have to straighten this out.
Florida Man (yelling after Marty):
Shouldn't we go over team strategy-
The door slams shut.
Florida Man:
What a strange reaction. He must have been overcome with emotion... touched at how dope this party is gonna be.
Gazoo:
He seemed excited...
Florida Man:
Well those small world robots weren't cheap.
The ghouls nod in agreement.
Best. Party. Ever.
A career high that shut up all the doubters, and put Florida Man on the map as scary talent... and not just scary. Yet the evening was tainted, when the glorious Epcot Mafia were robbed of their tag team championships by the loathsome High Roller's Club. Preston Reese would later cover the Roller's tab - but the damage was done. It was clear to everyone that if Florida Man hadn't exhausted himself in the BoB match, and come into the tag defense in better condition - the result might have been very different. Talk about the two Martys... Florida Man certainly didn't mean to turn Marty Donovan into the Marty Janetty of their celebrated team! Accidentally relegating a man he considers a brother to a New Rocker existence, while going onto singles glory. Even if that is what happened... Florida Man needs to set this right. At the very least the Sunshine State Stud needs to throw a lavish party in honour of their Revolution win.... and the only way to do that properly is to win back the tag titles.
Gazoo:
But in a cage, Flo? You don't do well behind bars. Remember your teens? And twenties?
Florida Man:
I don't remember sitting down. No, cage be damned. My understanding is we're taking on Rage and Cage inside a cage... that is one too many cages. So maybe me and Marty just have to double team Rage inside his partner? Oh yeah! We can beat the High Rollers... I just have to become a better gambler than them.
Sitting in the middle of a living room, the commonwealth champion and his faithful painted dwarf attorney are playing cards.
Florida Man (throws down way too many cards):
Read it and weep - TWO FULL HOUSES.
Proud of himself, FML reaches in to collect the hoard - which mostly seems to be expired medicine that may have been stolen from a local retirement community. So many estrogen pills.
Gazoo:
Not so fast, Flo....
The dwarf produces...
Gazoo:
Two full houses, a rules for playing poker, and three jokers!
Florida Man:
Dang it. How do you do it, Gaz?
Chuckling, the dwarf collects their wager. He'll lactate well tonight. Before the two can get their next round going, the front door opens.
"Ollie, you hom-"
Marty Donovan walks into his den to discover the rest of the Epcot Mafia decked out in only their Star Trek themed boxers, smoking a comedic amount of cigars, and definitely not using coasters.
Marty Donovan:
Now... I know I didn't give you keys.
Florida Man (snort):
(pointing a thumb at their host) You hear this guy? What a kidder!
Gazoo slaps his knees at the thought.
Florida Man:
Like we'd need keys?
Move over Barry Burton, because these Floridians are the MASTERS of UNLOCKING. Keys. If Florida Man wasn't wearing a mask, there would be tears streaming down his face. As it stands, FML just wipes away the crocodile tears. Wait. Did the temperature of the room just go up? Marty isn't laughing. Is he upset? More than the home invasion, and destruction of property, wearing Paramount mercy in Casa Donovan is a capital offence, and Disney's Own seems to be visibly shaken. Spectacularly self-absorbed, Florida Man just assumes Marty's surly disposition is over the tag title loss.
Florida Man:
Marty. I owe you an apology. Here I am winning all these big singles matches, and you probably think I sold our team out. I didn't. This is important to me. It's the MOST important thing to me. Why I had literally spent months planning this hella kickass party to celebrate our tag title win. Tell 'em, Gaz.
Gazoo:
So much ass.
Florida Man:
I had a lot of resources tied up in that party... which sort of got flushed when we lost the titles. Now I know what you're thinking "God dang, that would have been the best celebration ever, I bet you had pizza, and girls, and a piñata, and punch, and pie, and everything, how can we go on without kicking it hard? Should we just form a suicide pact?" WHOA! Put the gun away, Marty.... because I PROMISE we are going to have a DO OVER! We just need to win back our straps, and I have found a way to throw it again. We will party rock!
Disney's Own finds it hard enough tagging with Florida Man, let alone spending time with him outside of work - and is less than enthusiastic.
Marty Donovan:
...That's alright.
Florida Man:
Thanks for putting on a brave face, but we WILL have this celebration - even if I have to choke out Rage inside Cage's bowels.
...Jesus.
Gazoo:
How did you raise the money, Flo?
Florida Man (waving hand around):
I put a mortgage on the house.
Gazoo:
Damn Flo, that is going to be one hell of a party!
Hold on...
Marty Donovan:
Wait... this is my house!
Florida Man (nodding enthusiastically):
It was at a really good interest rate.
Marty Donovan (triple take):
That's not the point!
Gazoo (shooting back some expired estrogen):
....You're taking this very well Mister Donovan.... I wouldn't let Flo refinance MY home. ....Math is not his strong point.
This can't be happening.
Marty Donovan:
How did the bank even let you-
Florida Man:
I told them we were best friends.
Marty Donovan:
....
Florida Man:
At first they were a little lame about it, but they understand "bros before security questions."
This is real.
Marty Donovan:
CHRIST! YOU ALWAYS DO THIS!
Florida Man (seeming proud):
We have an ice sculpture...
Marty Donovan (putting on coat):
I have to straighten this out.
Florida Man (yelling after Marty):
Shouldn't we go over team strategy-
The door slams shut.
Florida Man:
What a strange reaction. He must have been overcome with emotion... touched at how dope this party is gonna be.
Gazoo:
He seemed excited...
Florida Man:
Well those small world robots weren't cheap.
The ghouls nod in agreement.
Best. Party. Ever.