And That's My Plan. (The promo so King Edmund wins gold)
Dec 22, 2023 18:04:37 GMT -5
Mongo the Destroyer, bloodiedfox, and 2 more like this
Post by ForeverKuroi on Dec 22, 2023 18:04:37 GMT -5
The scene fades to King Edmund IV sitting in a lavish office room in the Silvercrest Palace, which is, of course, the capital mansion of Supremia. He is holding several of the newest and coolest XHF Network action figures, which they make for the most successful XHF Network wrestlers. He’s holding one for Jack Diamond, Death Trap, and Layla Lavoie. And next to those three is a custom made one that Kind Edmund IV made for himself. It’s important to note that he didn’t make one for Mutt. He’s smashing them all against each other, and making sound effects for each other.
King Edmund IV: And here comes King Edmund THE FOURTH coming off the top ropes! SPEEEEEEEEEW! He hits Layla! He goes for the pin! One! Two Three! The fans are going nuts! OOOOOOOH! AHHHHHHH! King Edmund, they chant! King Edmund, we love you! As he gets up, Jack Diamond hits him! AHHHH! Jack Diamond’s hand nearly BREAKS from hitting a being as hard as steel! King Edmund THE FOURTH looks at Jack Diamond! The fans are shocked and silent! SURELY he’s not FOOLISH enough to show THE KING OF SUPREMIA SUCH DISRESPECT! And so…
King Edmund IV smacks the King Edmund action figure at Jack Diamond so it flies across the room.
King Edmund IV: KING EDMUND SMACKS HIM OUT OF THE RING AND ACROSS THE ARENA! The fans are amazed by how strong our King is! But wait!
King Edmund IV forces Death Trap on top of him.
King Edmund IV: The stupid, insignificant… LITTLE INCONCEIVABLY INFERIOR, NO-GOOD, PIECES OF TRASH DEATH TRAP TRIES TO PIN HIM! He didn’t even get to one before King Edmund THE FOURTH kicked out! But DING DING DING! The stupid XHF Network referee thought that zero equals three! The bell rings!
King Edmund IV introduces a referee action figure.
King Edmund IV: The referee comes in and he says… Wait, THE XHF NETWORK MAKES AN ACTION FIGURE FOR THE REFEREE AND NOT THE GREAT KING EDMUND THE FOURTH OF SUPREMIA!?
King Edmund IV forces himself to cool down.
King Edmund IV: He says that Death Trap pinned him somehow and Jack Diamond won too because we all feel bad for him! We want to exclude The Hallowed Kingdom of Supremia because we are just too jealou-
That’s when, just suddenly, a two-way wall communication panel activates and Supremian defector, Jacob Friedman, pops in.
Cumhersnatch: Edmund.
King Edmund IV freaks out and all the action figures scatter all around the room.
King Edmund IV: CUMHERSNATCH, YOU WHELP! You’re supposed to have Mutt give me proper warning when you’re about to call!
Cumhersnatch: And I keep trying to tell you, Mutt can’t talk!
King Edmund IV: Excuses, excuses! You didn’t see anything, did you?
Cumhersnatch: No, I didn’t see you play with your little dolls.
King Edmund IV: GOOD. Now, why did you message me?
Cumhersnatch: I wanted to remind you about your match for the tag team championship.
King Edmund IV: What!? I’m wrestling for the tag team championship!? REALLY!? How could I forget!?
Cumhersnatch: You keep repressing the memory because of your tag team partner, Tongo The Transformer.
King Edmund IV: THAT THIEF! THAT NO-GOOD CROOK! ONCE HE STEPS FOOT INTO MY COUNTRY, I WILL HAVE HIM FLOGGED! Mutt, come in here!
The door opens with barely any lapse in time. Mutt follows shortly after.
King Edmund IV: What does flogged mean?
Mutt: …
King Edmund IV: …GOOD!
Cumhersnatch: Look, I don’t care what you want to do to him. Right now, you have to work with him. Do you have any strategies?
King Edmund IV: OF COURSE I HAVE A STRATEGY! My strategy is to provide incentive to my dear tag team subordinate!
Cumhersnatch: …incentive? What are you talking about?
That’s what a smirk crawls along King Edmund IV’s face.
King Edmund IV: Just watch.
King Edmund IV presses a button on a remote that turns to this screen.
In the screen, King Edmund IV goes up to a dozen destitute and impoverished Supremian citizens.
King Edmund IV: Congratulations to all of you for making it this far. Now the next game, you two will be split into two teams. The game is manicure, pedicure and massage. Team One will get my right side and Team Two will get the other side. Whoever loses will be EXECUTED! I WILL MAKE SURE YOU DIE A HORRIBLE DEATH! YOU WILL PERISH! YOU WILL NEVER BEEN SEEN OR HEARD FROM AGAIN! NOW BEGIN!
The screen cuts to a poor peasant who appears in a reality show confessional booth.
Poor Supremian #1: I’m going to win this challenge. I’ve come too far to lose now. I’ve won the wipe King Edmund’s butt challenge, lick the wine stains off his carpet challenge, AND the pull his food out of the oven with my bare hands challenge. And the prize here is one quid! That’s the equivalent of one dollar and twenty-seven cents! If I win, I can send that money to my family and actually afford to feed them! We'll never go hungry again!
The scene cuts to a completely different peasant contestant.
Poor Supremian #2: I hope someone else on my team trims those toenails. They’re absolutely disgusting. They look like they belong to an ogre, rather than that of a huma-
King Edmund IV (from the background): WHAT!? WHAT DID YOU SAY!? YOU ARE FILTH! YOU ARE NOTHING! AND YOU ARE ELIMINATED! MUTT, HAVE THIS LOSER TAKEN FOR EXECUTION RIGHT THIS INSTANCE! DO IT!!! DO IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The camera switches back to King Edmund IV looking at Jacob Friedman through the screen of the two-way communicator.
King Edmund IV: And that’s my plan!
Cumhersnatch: What’s your plan? You just told me to watch and then disappeared for two or three minutes.
King Edmund IV: …WHAT!?
Cumhersnatch: Yeah, nothing came up at all. Did you have something up on your screen?
King Edmund IV: …YES! MUTT, EXPLAIN THIS!
Mutt: …
Cumhersnatch: MUTT CAN’T TALK! How about you just show me your idea?
The scene fades to black.
King Edmund IV: And here comes King Edmund THE FOURTH coming off the top ropes! SPEEEEEEEEEW! He hits Layla! He goes for the pin! One! Two Three! The fans are going nuts! OOOOOOOH! AHHHHHHH! King Edmund, they chant! King Edmund, we love you! As he gets up, Jack Diamond hits him! AHHHH! Jack Diamond’s hand nearly BREAKS from hitting a being as hard as steel! King Edmund THE FOURTH looks at Jack Diamond! The fans are shocked and silent! SURELY he’s not FOOLISH enough to show THE KING OF SUPREMIA SUCH DISRESPECT! And so…
King Edmund IV smacks the King Edmund action figure at Jack Diamond so it flies across the room.
King Edmund IV: KING EDMUND SMACKS HIM OUT OF THE RING AND ACROSS THE ARENA! The fans are amazed by how strong our King is! But wait!
King Edmund IV forces Death Trap on top of him.
King Edmund IV: The stupid, insignificant… LITTLE INCONCEIVABLY INFERIOR, NO-GOOD, PIECES OF TRASH DEATH TRAP TRIES TO PIN HIM! He didn’t even get to one before King Edmund THE FOURTH kicked out! But DING DING DING! The stupid XHF Network referee thought that zero equals three! The bell rings!
King Edmund IV introduces a referee action figure.
King Edmund IV: The referee comes in and he says… Wait, THE XHF NETWORK MAKES AN ACTION FIGURE FOR THE REFEREE AND NOT THE GREAT KING EDMUND THE FOURTH OF SUPREMIA!?
King Edmund IV forces himself to cool down.
King Edmund IV: He says that Death Trap pinned him somehow and Jack Diamond won too because we all feel bad for him! We want to exclude The Hallowed Kingdom of Supremia because we are just too jealou-
That’s when, just suddenly, a two-way wall communication panel activates and Supremian defector, Jacob Friedman, pops in.
Cumhersnatch: Edmund.
King Edmund IV freaks out and all the action figures scatter all around the room.
King Edmund IV: CUMHERSNATCH, YOU WHELP! You’re supposed to have Mutt give me proper warning when you’re about to call!
Cumhersnatch: And I keep trying to tell you, Mutt can’t talk!
King Edmund IV: Excuses, excuses! You didn’t see anything, did you?
Cumhersnatch: No, I didn’t see you play with your little dolls.
King Edmund IV: GOOD. Now, why did you message me?
Cumhersnatch: I wanted to remind you about your match for the tag team championship.
King Edmund IV: What!? I’m wrestling for the tag team championship!? REALLY!? How could I forget!?
Cumhersnatch: You keep repressing the memory because of your tag team partner, Tongo The Transformer.
King Edmund IV: THAT THIEF! THAT NO-GOOD CROOK! ONCE HE STEPS FOOT INTO MY COUNTRY, I WILL HAVE HIM FLOGGED! Mutt, come in here!
The door opens with barely any lapse in time. Mutt follows shortly after.
King Edmund IV: What does flogged mean?
Mutt: …
King Edmund IV: …GOOD!
Cumhersnatch: Look, I don’t care what you want to do to him. Right now, you have to work with him. Do you have any strategies?
King Edmund IV: OF COURSE I HAVE A STRATEGY! My strategy is to provide incentive to my dear tag team subordinate!
Cumhersnatch: …incentive? What are you talking about?
That’s what a smirk crawls along King Edmund IV’s face.
King Edmund IV: Just watch.
King Edmund IV presses a button on a remote that turns to this screen.
In the screen, King Edmund IV goes up to a dozen destitute and impoverished Supremian citizens.
King Edmund IV: Congratulations to all of you for making it this far. Now the next game, you two will be split into two teams. The game is manicure, pedicure and massage. Team One will get my right side and Team Two will get the other side. Whoever loses will be EXECUTED! I WILL MAKE SURE YOU DIE A HORRIBLE DEATH! YOU WILL PERISH! YOU WILL NEVER BEEN SEEN OR HEARD FROM AGAIN! NOW BEGIN!
The screen cuts to a poor peasant who appears in a reality show confessional booth.
Poor Supremian #1: I’m going to win this challenge. I’ve come too far to lose now. I’ve won the wipe King Edmund’s butt challenge, lick the wine stains off his carpet challenge, AND the pull his food out of the oven with my bare hands challenge. And the prize here is one quid! That’s the equivalent of one dollar and twenty-seven cents! If I win, I can send that money to my family and actually afford to feed them! We'll never go hungry again!
The scene cuts to a completely different peasant contestant.
Poor Supremian #2: I hope someone else on my team trims those toenails. They’re absolutely disgusting. They look like they belong to an ogre, rather than that of a huma-
King Edmund IV (from the background): WHAT!? WHAT DID YOU SAY!? YOU ARE FILTH! YOU ARE NOTHING! AND YOU ARE ELIMINATED! MUTT, HAVE THIS LOSER TAKEN FOR EXECUTION RIGHT THIS INSTANCE! DO IT!!! DO IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The camera switches back to King Edmund IV looking at Jacob Friedman through the screen of the two-way communicator.
King Edmund IV: And that’s my plan!
Cumhersnatch: What’s your plan? You just told me to watch and then disappeared for two or three minutes.
King Edmund IV: …WHAT!?
Cumhersnatch: Yeah, nothing came up at all. Did you have something up on your screen?
King Edmund IV: …YES! MUTT, EXPLAIN THIS!
Mutt: …
Cumhersnatch: MUTT CAN’T TALK! How about you just show me your idea?
The scene fades to black.