Post by Dave D-Flipz on Jan 21, 2024 0:50:55 GMT -5
Death Trap: It’s … it’s …
*Death Trap is seen to be standing in the kitchenette of the rental property in North Carolina where the Bowler Hat Brigade has been holed up for months now. He is holding a gold painted child’s sippy cup in his hand. He is staring at it in a trance.*
Funaki: A child’s drinking implement?
Death Trap: Beeeeeeautiful! And it’s ours. You, me and Mistress. It’s ours. We WON it. In our first set of races! Hell the AMC has been around since the start and they don’t have one of these!
*Funaki looks at his friend, confused.*
Funaki: I mean… yeah … but it’s literally a children’s cup ordered on amazon or something. Memaw isn’t exactly generous with her main trophy is sh-
Death Trap: Look at it gleam. You know what this means Funaki? We are back on top! Mistress and I haven’t had any title since the tag titles were stolen from us. We have been chasing them.
*Funaki looks over into the other room and sees Mistress and Chaos talking, Mistress looking quite perturbed by her husband for some reason. Funaki glances back at him*
Funaki: Uh huh … and she looks so thrilled-
Death Trap: I know! RIGHT! She’s ecstatic! As am I. And as you should be. When did YOU last hold a title!? Over 20 years right?
*Funaki perks an eyebrow up.*
Funaki: It has been a while. And while this isn’t a true title, it isn’t defended … winning sure feels nice.
*DT pops the top off the trophy and pours in a very expensive Italian wine. He begins to sip it like it were the Elixer of Life. Over in the next room, Mistress points at this and begins to animatedly yell to her manager about this event.*
Funaki: Yah … life is good …
*Funaki is handed the cup and gulps some down before stopping and contorting his face, clearly not a connoisseur of the vino.*
Funaki: FUNAKI … AND BOWLER HAT BRIGADE … NUMBA ONE!!!!
*DT laughs and raises his sippy cup to that.*
Death Trap: And now we have an immediate chance for a SECOND title! An athletic cup! A single race for a trophy. Funaki the world is turning around. We are clearly entering another golden age. And Mistress will be bringing home the X*Crown championship after Supremacy… maybe you can bring home the Junior Heavyweight title?
Funaki: I … am not really in shape to wrestle …
*DT shrugs*
Death Trap: But with this run of dominance about to start, how could you lose? Either way, let’s make sure we are ready for this race. I want more wins. The fans are cheering our names. Can you hear them? It’s glorious. Fuck Cross Recoba and his lost title. Bitch, knew I was better than him.
*DT sips his wine from his child’s cup.*
1. What’s your characters new year resolution?
Death Trap: KEEP … WINNING! WOOO!
2. How’s the new year treating them?
Death Trap: I got a shiny trophy don’t I? 2024 is starting off amazing.
3. Favorite firework?
Death Trap: The big loud ones are my favorites
Funaki: I like the red ones that glitter then rain down like weeping willows.
4. How will your team respond to winning?
Death Trap: YEEES! Two trophies back to back! Now I can protect my nuts in STYLE!
5. How will your team respond to not winning?
Death Trap: CONSPIRACY! WHAT THE HELL IS THIS? Clearly we won! I demand the immediate passing of a law outlawing all DOOF FLOOF!
*Death Trap is seen to be standing in the kitchenette of the rental property in North Carolina where the Bowler Hat Brigade has been holed up for months now. He is holding a gold painted child’s sippy cup in his hand. He is staring at it in a trance.*
Funaki: A child’s drinking implement?
Death Trap: Beeeeeeautiful! And it’s ours. You, me and Mistress. It’s ours. We WON it. In our first set of races! Hell the AMC has been around since the start and they don’t have one of these!
*Funaki looks at his friend, confused.*
Funaki: I mean… yeah … but it’s literally a children’s cup ordered on amazon or something. Memaw isn’t exactly generous with her main trophy is sh-
Death Trap: Look at it gleam. You know what this means Funaki? We are back on top! Mistress and I haven’t had any title since the tag titles were stolen from us. We have been chasing them.
*Funaki looks over into the other room and sees Mistress and Chaos talking, Mistress looking quite perturbed by her husband for some reason. Funaki glances back at him*
Funaki: Uh huh … and she looks so thrilled-
Death Trap: I know! RIGHT! She’s ecstatic! As am I. And as you should be. When did YOU last hold a title!? Over 20 years right?
*Funaki perks an eyebrow up.*
Funaki: It has been a while. And while this isn’t a true title, it isn’t defended … winning sure feels nice.
*DT pops the top off the trophy and pours in a very expensive Italian wine. He begins to sip it like it were the Elixer of Life. Over in the next room, Mistress points at this and begins to animatedly yell to her manager about this event.*
Funaki: Yah … life is good …
*Funaki is handed the cup and gulps some down before stopping and contorting his face, clearly not a connoisseur of the vino.*
Funaki: FUNAKI … AND BOWLER HAT BRIGADE … NUMBA ONE!!!!
*DT laughs and raises his sippy cup to that.*
Death Trap: And now we have an immediate chance for a SECOND title! An athletic cup! A single race for a trophy. Funaki the world is turning around. We are clearly entering another golden age. And Mistress will be bringing home the X*Crown championship after Supremacy… maybe you can bring home the Junior Heavyweight title?
Funaki: I … am not really in shape to wrestle …
*DT shrugs*
Death Trap: But with this run of dominance about to start, how could you lose? Either way, let’s make sure we are ready for this race. I want more wins. The fans are cheering our names. Can you hear them? It’s glorious. Fuck Cross Recoba and his lost title. Bitch, knew I was better than him.
*DT sips his wine from his child’s cup.*
1. What’s your characters new year resolution?
Death Trap: KEEP … WINNING! WOOO!
2. How’s the new year treating them?
Death Trap: I got a shiny trophy don’t I? 2024 is starting off amazing.
3. Favorite firework?
Death Trap: The big loud ones are my favorites
Funaki: I like the red ones that glitter then rain down like weeping willows.
4. How will your team respond to winning?
Death Trap: YEEES! Two trophies back to back! Now I can protect my nuts in STYLE!
5. How will your team respond to not winning?
Death Trap: CONSPIRACY! WHAT THE HELL IS THIS? Clearly we won! I demand the immediate passing of a law outlawing all DOOF FLOOF!
