Match: The High Roller's Club vs. The Dominicus Republic
War Games
As we fade back from commercials/backstage, the second ring has been set up. Spotlights have highlighted the rings, and strobes are flashing behind the cage that is still hanging from the ceiling.
Tucker: Fans, it is just about time for us to be getting started with the first of our two War Games matches! This one is W:UK internal, and it pits Wesley Crane and the High Rollers Club against Lord Dominicus and the alliance he has assembled with Lady EVIL, Lynx, and the Brothers Gluck.
The imposing sounds of Holst’s “Mars, Bringer of War” play as the cage slowly lowers. Ringside technicians are on hand to make sure the pegs that hold the cage in place fit properly into their slots. We don’t want anyone pulling a Seth Rollins and nearly getting impaled by the cage.
Salazar: The following contest is a five on five WAR GAMES MATCH! The rules are as follows! Two men will start the match for a period of five minutes! At the beginning of the fourth minute, there will be a coin toss. The team winning the coin toss will send one wrestler into the match. Every two minutes after that, the two teams will alternate sending wrestlers into the match. Once all ten wrestlers are in the ring, the Match Beyond begins! The only way to win is via submission or surrender!
Torchwood: ‘Surrender’ in War Games is when one person on a team surrenders the match, usually on behalf of an incapacitated teammate who is incapable of submitting. For example, many people remember the New World Order slamming the cage door on Ric Flair’s head, but technically, the finish of the match was Steve McMichael surrendering to keep them from doing it again.
Fulton: Sorry for mentioning the ‘real guys’ folks, won’t happen again.
Salazar: Introducing first! At a combined weight of 1171 lbs! The Brothers Gluck! Lady EVIL! Lynx! And the team captain, Lord Dominicus!
The entryway goes dark and fills with steam. Then the lights come on behind it, turning it almost opaque. And in the mist, two shadowy figures rise up.
Fulton: Holy crap lads what’ve the Glucks done?!
Carlton and Chapps have traded out their usual dirty redneck clothes for black fur and white masks. Carlton’s is a wolf’s skull, Chapps’ is a modified deer skull with sharp teeth, complete with antlers. Chapps’ black fur is worn around his waist like a kilt, his muscular upper body bare. Carlton’s is worn over his shoulders like a poncho.
Carlton and Chapps stand silently as Lord Dominicus comes out, riding on Lady EVIL’s shoulders. He looks between them, and seems nonplussed behind his mask.
Tucker: Dominicus and the Glucks aren’t overly fond of each other, and I think this is somehow about the Glucks deciding they could do a better job of being evil than Dominicus?
Torchwood: ANd how does Lynx factor into this?
Fulton: Oh Dominicus just wanted Lynx because he good. Which may be the least weird or stupid thing he’s ever said or done.
Lynx is out last, and he gets a big reaction from the fans.
Tucker: Of course that’s Eron Hunter under his old mask, and we have to wonder, is he going to stick with the Eron Hunter style of wrestling or are we going to see more high flying out of him?
The music stops.
Then, rap starts playing. Of course it’s “I’m So Paid” by Akon.
Salazar: And their opponents! Weighing in at a combined weight of 1145 lbs! “Woke” Wesley Rage! “Honest” Nic Cage! Preston Andre Reese! Timmy Draven! And the team captain, “The High Roller” Wesley Crane! They are the HIGH ROLLERS CLUB!
No weird theatrics. Reese is out first, followed by Ragencage. Then comes Draven. And last, slapping Draven on the back, is Wesley Crane.
Tucker: There are no weird relationships between the High Rollers, first. Wesley Crane’s status as the faction leader is unquestioned, and there’s no resentment, that we know of, or one-upsmanship going on with them. The High Rollers have always managed to put on a united face.
The High Rollers arrive at ringside, and security is there to keep them and Evil Team Dominiglucklynx apart.
Tucker: The two teams have to each select someone to start the match. And it’s going to be - Wesley Crane starting for the High Rollers?
Torchwood: You mentioned that there’s little friction inside the High Rollers Club, but something you have to keep in mind is the way these heel factions operate. Wesley Crane has to be willing and able to prove he’s the biggest and baddest at any time, because if he starts slipping, someone like Reese or Warrick might decide they could do better.
Fulton: Speaking of Warrick, how come Timmy Draven’s in the match and not him?
Tucker: Warrick couldn’t shake off the ring rust and he’s gone. And it looks like with Crane in the ring, Dominicus is going right in after him!
Fulton: LET’S FUCKING GOOOOO LADS!
DING! DING! DING!Crane and Dominicus charge each other. Dominicus combat rolls under a clothesline and comes to his feet with a spin kick that lands on the button! Crane is stunned and Dominicus leaps on him with a Thesz press! He lays in the right hands before Crane bucks him off, but before Crane can get ready to counter attack, Dominicus lands an enzuigiri! He Irish whips Crane right at the cage - Crane puts the brakes on, lands a stiff elbow, and a running clothesline to knock Dominicus to the mat.
Tucker: An early attempt at using the cage, and here’s something that may become a factor - three of the members of Team Dominicus are wearing masks, and that’s going to afford some protection from those chain links.
Fulton: I’ma be serious for just a little. I’ve wrestled not in a War Games, but I’ve been in cage matches before, and you just don’t realize how rough and jagged those metal links are. They’ll cut ya, son, they’ll cut ya. Maybe not through a mask though.
Now Crane grabs Dominicus by the head and pulls him to his feet. Snarling, Crane lands several heavy elbows on Dominicus, then picks him up and spears him into the corner. Crane winds up and delivers a couple massive chops. The second one causes Dominicus’ knees to buckle. Crane Irish whips Dominicus across the ring, Dominicus catches the ropes. Crane rushes in, and Dominicus drops and pulls down the rope! Where Crane would normally take a spill to the outside, he lands in between the two rings.
Tucker: Crane has almost nowhere to go caught in between the two rings with about a foot and a half of room to move.
From the ground Dominicus throws an upkick into Crane’s face. Crane falls back - bounces off the ropes and pongs forward into the other ropes. He hangs there dazed. Dominicus runs to the middle rope and comes off with a flying knee - Crane dodges and Dominicus hits the mat hard! Crane pulls Dominicus under the bottom rope and up so they’re both in the little run between the two rings. Crane gets Dominicus in a rear waistlock, and delivers a release German suplex!
Tucker: There’s no give on the ring aprons there!
Hanging onto the ropes, Crane uses them for balance as he stomps away at Dominicus. Then he pulls Dominicus up. Still behind him, Crane tries to run Dominicus into the chain links, but Dominicus simply drops and shoulder throws Crane!
Salazar: There is one minute left in the period! Tony Blood himself will be performing the coin toss since none of our referees or our timekeeper have names!
As Dominicus and Crane grapple in no man’s land, Lady EVIL and Preston Reese approach Tony Blood and the security.
Blood: Reese, call it in the air!
He flips a coin.
Reese: Tails!
Blood: Tails it is!
Fulton: Isn’t it amazing how I don’t think there’s ever been a War Games match where the good guys won the coin toss?
Dominicus jumps, snares Crane around the neck with his legs, and frankensteiners them both over the ropes and into Ring 2 (that is, the ring that doesn’t have the door). He picks Crane up into a fireman’s carry, and then shifts him down into the Domini-Lock!
Torchwood: Dominicus using that llave inspired hold, and the thing about these War Games matches is, until everyone’s in the ring, the match can’t end no matter how badly Dominicus hurts Crane!
Dominicus is torquing the hold as much as he can while he watches the gate. The fans chant along with the count.
TEN! NINE! EIGHT! SEVEN! SIX! FIVE! FOUR! THREE! TWO! ONE!BUZZZZZZZZ!!!!Tucker: Here comes Preston Andre Reese!
Reese rushes into the ring. Dominicus makes the decision to drop Crane and get ready for Reese. But instead of diving over the ropes, Reese grabs the middle rope and slings himself through them, spearing Dominicus down! While Crane rubs his neck Reese just bashes away at Dominicus’ face, and then executes a snap suplex. Now Crane is up. Both men grab Dominicus by one arm each, and they just run across the ring and launch Dominicus face first into the steel cage!
OHHHHHH!!!!
Tucker: The fans may be routing for Dominicus’ team, but make no mistake, what they’re really routing for is violence, and they’re about to get it.
Reese climbs ‘out of the ring’ - meaning he’s standing in that narrow area between the ropes and the chain. Crane helps him pull Dominincus up. Reese bashes Dominicus’ head into the chain. Dominicus falls backwards and ends up hanging backwards over the top rope. Crane comes off the middle rope with a driving elbow that sends Dominicus backwards over the ropes and into Ring 2. Crane pulls Dominicus to his feet, and Reese carefully sets up a springboard, then catches Dominicus with the Preston Cutter!
Torchwood: The count is going down, and the High Rollers are trying to do enough damage to Dominicus that they can incapacitate him before the next member of Dominicus' Team enters. And it looks like they’ve decided on Lady EVIL coming in next!
Tucker: Just to be clear, this Lady EVIL is NOT Kasper Van Zant. I believe her real name is Lizzy MacMorrow, and I don’t know what kind of wrestling background she has.
Torchwood: I don’t know how much I buy it, but that mask seems to imbue the wrestlers who don it with some kind of power. I know we saw a ton of flying out of Kasper when she wore it.
Crane and Reese leave Dominicus down and decide to crowd the door, waiting on it to open.
TEN! NINE! EIGHT! SEVEN! SIX! FIVE! FOUR! THREE! TWO! ONE!
TEN! NINE! EIGHT! SEVEN! SIX! FIVE! FOUR! THREE! TWO! ONE!BUZZZZZZZZ!!!!Lady EVIL doesn’t hesitate to enter the ring, but she just runs into a one-on-two beatdown. When Crane and Reese think they’ve done enough damage they drag her away from the door and, just like they did with Dominicus, run her towards the cage and launch her.
Except she jumps and uses her feet to backflip off the top rope, and with a handful of hair on each High Roller, slam them to the mat!
Tucker: Completely legal in War Games!
Reese is up much more quickly than Crane. Lady EVIL shotgun dropkicks him and senton splashes Crane as she lands. Leaving Crane lying she kicks Reese into the corner. She rushes in, poses while standing on his thighs, then rolls backwards with a monkey flip. She also rolls backwards to her feet, and does a backflip into an elbow drop on Reese!
Crane is recovered and he clubs her from behind with a sledge!
But Dominicus is recovered too! That one sledge is all that Crane lands before Dominicus takes him down with a neckbreaker.
Torchwood: War Games is a tug of war as the one team will briefly enjoy a one man advantage before the other gets a fresh man. And the advantage gets smaller as the match goes on - three on two is closer to even than two on one.
Fulton: I mean ideally, once the High Rollers got the advantage instead of trying to be ‘normal’ they’d just start hitting Dominicus with chain piledrivers, but what do I know.
Dominicus sits on the top rope. Lady EVIL grabs Reese by the legs and slingshots him up - into Dominicus’ feet! Reese falls backwards over Lady EVIL’s knees and Dominicus follows up with an elbow off the middle rope.
Tucker: You’ll see a lot more middle rope attacks than usual from these high flyers because going all the way to the top runs the risk of the cage ceiling interfering with their offense.
Speaking of the cage ceiling, Dominicus has latched onto it and the fans go nuts as he hangs like a monkey from the top of the cage and hand walks along the top so he can drop down on Reese.
Torchwood: That was needlessly elaborate.
TEN! NINE! EIGHT! SEVEN! SIX! FIVE! FOUR! THREE! TWO! ONE!BUZZZZZZZZ!!!!Tucker: Looks like the third man for the High Rollers is going to be Woke Wesley Rage.
Rage is quickly into the cage and he gets right down to the War Games business by simply booting Dominicus in the sack.
Torchwood: Wesley Rage is, at his heart, a dirty, sloppy brawler. He and Nic Cage definitely have a ‘whole is more than the sum of the parts’ dynamic, but in this environment Rage might just be a bigger force than people are expecting.
Rage grabs Lady EVIL around the neck and manages to take her down in a sloppy kind of legsweep chokeslam.
Tucker: The Fall of Fascism!
Fulton: He wishes. Anyone want to build a catapult and send him to Beijing?
While Rage works over Lady EVIL, Crane and Reese are free to double team Dominicus again. This time, it means that Reese holds Dominicus’ arms behind his back while Crane lands punches and stomps to the midsection. He then grabs Dominicus’ by the head, literally biting the mask on the eye! After a bit he lets go, only to shove a finger into a newly made hole in the mask. Dominicus kicks out and knocks Crane backwards, but Reese lifts him in the chickenwing and slams him to the mat. Now Reese kneels on Dominicus’ back while pulling his head up in a modified camel clutch. Crane runs the ropes and dropkicks Dominicus on the face.
While this was going on, Rage has thrown Lady EVIL into the corner. He hangs onto the ropes and just stomps the absolutely living hell out of her. Now Rage takes his own turn at going after the mask, grabbing the mask by the jaw and trying to rip it off her head! Lady EVIL counters with a punch to the dick. With Rage paralyzed from the pain, she grabs him and flapjacks him onto the top rope.
But Crane and Reese, noticing her gaining an advantage and with Dominicus down, they come to Rage’s rescue. Lady EVIL pokes Reese in the eye but catches a running Euro uppercut from Crane. Crane rolls her out of the ring and begins rubbing her face up against the chain links.
Tucker: The High Rollers sticking with the divide and conquer strategy, but it’s going to get harder in a bit, because we’re reaching the beginning of the next period!
Reese and Rage pull Dominicus to his feet. Dominicus tries to fight back with elbows and kicks, but after he nearly knocks Rage away, Reese just slams him to the mat by the mask. Crane has spun Lady EVIL around and is trying to grind her back into the chain links.
TEN! NINE! EIGHT! SEVEN! SIX! FIVE! FOUR! THREE! TWO! ONE!BUZZZZZZZZ!!!!Tucker: It’s gonna be Carlton Gluck!
Torchwood: The big guy? I was sure he’d be their last man.
Fulton: Yeah, I mean, he’s kind of… heavyset, has he got the stamina to last from here?
Carlton has taken off that headdress with the skull, leaving behind white facepaint with some black and red markings. He rumbles into the ring and the High Rollers immediately jump him. But with one surge of power, he sends all three of them head over heels before climbing into the ring!
And then he starts handing out Gluckplexes.
Belly to belly Gluckplex for Crane!
Overhead belly to belly Gluckplex for Reese!
Gutwrench Gluckplex for Rage!
Carlton quickly checks in on Lady EVIL. The cage has caused a laceration on her shoulder blade. Then he grabs Crane again. He runs him down the cage and LAUNCHES him face first into the chain links!
Torchwood: And the former W:UK World Champion is busted open!
Carlton turns and does it to Reese. Reese kind of blocks with his forearms, but still takes it pretty hard.
Dominicus is on his feet again, and he goes after Rage. A snapmare followed by some Mongolian chops connect, and then he applies the inverted facelock! Rage hollers, trying to figure out a way to escape when there are no rope breaks.
Lady EVIL picks up Reese where Carlton dropped him, and she applies a Muy Thai clinch before landing some knees to the body. The last one sends Reese staggering. Clutching his midsection he falls and rolls under both sets of ropes into Ring 2.
Carlton moves in on Crane, but Crane quickly rakes the eyes and flapjacks Carlton across the top rope. He tries a bulldog, but Carlton doesn’t go down, and instead converts it into the Country Strong Gluckplex!
Tucker: Wesley Crane and Lord Dominicus have been in there for a long time, and Crane did not need to take a suplex like that. Sending in the big man might’ve been a good move for Team Dominicus, because he’s still going to be fresh when the High Rollers send their fourth man in. And Carlton Gluck outweighs Draven by 40 pounds and Nic Cage by over 90.
Lady EVIL tries a dropkick on Reese, but he manages to sidestep. Her legs bounce off the ropes and she lands awkwardly. Reese quickly applies a figure 4 leglock.
Torchwood: Now you never want to be favoring a knee, but having a target on a limb in a War Games is pretty much a worst case scenario. And that’s why Dominicus quickly dropping what he was doing to go to her aid.
TEN! NINE! EIGHT! SEVEN! SIX! FIVE! FOUR! THREE! TWO! ONE!BUZZZZZZZZ!!!!Fulton: They’re gonna send Nic Cage in! I guess Timmy Draven’s being saved for cleanup duty.
Tucker: But now Cage has to fight Carlton Gluck, and the big guy’s not even off his feet.
Cage just barely enters the cage, and hangs back. Carlton lumbers towards him - and Cage reaches into his pocket and lashes out with something!
Tucker: What the hell was that?!
Fulton: Cologne bomb! I can smell it from here! Clive Christian Original son, you think the High Rollers would go for less?
With Carlton blinded Cage easily connects with a kick to the crotch that drops him to his knees, and then he goes all the way to the top rope to come off with a mushroom stomp! Leaving the big guy down for a bit he runs to Reese’s aid, throwing a handful of powder into Dominicus’ face! Rage climbs into Ring 2 with them, leaving Carlton down in Ring 1. Rage picks Dominicus up and scoop slams him, then picks up Cage and slams him down on Dominicus! And then Cage gets up and slams Rage down on Dominicus!
Crane and Reese meanwhile pick Lady EVIL up. They send her off the ropes and step aside as she comes back towards Rage. Rage rolls backwards and picks the ankle as he does.
Tucker: The Revolution!
Torchwood: Again, no matter how much damage the High Rollers do to Lady EVIL’s knee, the match can’t end until three more men enter the ring!
Lady EVIL screams. She’s clawing her way across the mat. Cage jumps off the middle rope with a leg drop across the back of the head, putting a stop to that.
Carlton can tell there’s commotion going on in Ring 2, but he’s still having trouble seeing. As he gets in between the two rings Crane is there with an In The Face! Carlton is knocked back and ends up sitting in between the rings.
Dominicus gets up and tries to break the hold, but he just manages one forearm to Rage’s head - which doesn’t break the hold - before Cage missile dropkicks him from behind. Dominicus stumbles forward and gets folded in half via a Reese clothesline.
Tucker: The timer for the next member of Team Dominicus is a minute away, but while she’s trapped in that hold, a minute for Lady EVIL might as well be an eternity! Dominicus is down! Carlton Gluck can’t see!
Carlton has pulled himself together but as he tries to climb into Ring 2, Crane Reese and Cage are all there for a stomp-in. Then Cage starts pulling the pad off one of the bottom turnbuckles.
Torchwood: The High Rollers now setting something else up!
Fulton: Have you ever noticed how any time the High Rollers and Dominicus’s Dudes scrap, all the worst stuff happens to Carlton Gluck?
Reese and Crane each have one of Carlton’s arms, and they try Irish whipping him. Carlton blocks as best he can, hooking one of his legs into the ropes. Crane and Reese pound on him, trying to get him loose.
TEN! NINE! EIGHT! SEVEN! SIX! FIVE! FOUR! THREE! TWO! ONE!BUZZZZZZZZ!!!!Tucker: And here comes Lynx!
Torchwood: Now something that’s going to be scary in that match is Lynx’s kicks. But he needs to save Lady EVIL before the High Rollers do any more damage to her knee!
Crane, Reese and Cage spread out, Crane in the middle, Reese and Cage each at a turnbuckle, trying to block Lynx’s entry into Ring 2.
Lynx sizes up the situation and bolts. He leaps clear over the Ring 1 and Ring 2 ropes and catches Crane around the neck in a headscissor. Spinning, he releases Crane directly at Rage! Rage is knocked loose from Lady EVIL as Lynx is quickly up to his feet. He bounces a sole butt off Reese’s ribs into a roundhouse kick to Cage’s head, back leg sweeps Reese, runs the ropes and White Tiger Lariats Cage inside out!
Lynx helps Lady EVIL to her feet. She’s limping, trying to work the kinks out of her knee, but she can walk.
Meanwhile, Dominicus has spotted the place where the High Rollers removed the turnbuckle pad. An EVIL plan quickly and obviously formulates in his head, and he barks an order to Carlton.
Torchwood: What do you suppose our evil overlord has up his sleeve?
Carlton Irish whips Crane towards the corner… Dominicus hits a perfectly positioned drop toe hold, and Crane eats it right into the turnbuckle bolt! The fans erupt as Crane writhes around, kicking his legs!
Tucker: Did he hit his eye?
Fulton: Bruh I don’t care what he hit that’s gonna leave a mark! Lucky thing he’s got plenty of scar removal surgery money.
Dominicus decides he wants to see it again. This time it’s Cage about to take the spill. Lynx passes Cage to Carlton, Carlton Irish whips him - Cage baseball slides before Dominicus can deliver a drop toe hold. And Lady EVIL quickly snatches up the wrist and twists Cage up into the Purgatory!
Tucker: Straightjacket clutch on Nic Cage!
Lynx puts Rage in the corner and starts hitting roundhouse kicks and elbows.
Dominicus shoves Crane’s face into the steel cage and starts grinding it back and forth!
Carlton puts Reese’s neck over the bottom rope and kneels on the back of his head, choking him!
TEN! NINE! EIGHT! SEVEN! SIX! FIVE! FOUR! THREE! TWO! ONE!BUZZZZZZZZ!!!!Tucker: And in comes Timmy Draven!
Even though he’s on the High Rollers, Draven gets a bit of a face pop as he enters the ring.
Torchwood: Timmy Draven making his W:UK debut in place of Warrick. He’s the biggest man on the High Rollers, and he’s got heavy, heavy hands.
Draven’s first attack is to save Reese from Carlton. He grabs a handful of Carlton’s beard and lays in a series of stiff elbows. The big man finally goes stumbling backwards. Draven climbs into Ring 2, scoops Lady EVIL up from behind and hits her with a pendulum backbreaker, saving Cage. A clothesline from behind drops Lynx to the mat, leaving Rage to try and get himself together. Then Draven moves in on Crane and Dominicus.
Tucker: Timmy Draven trained Wesley Crane, he was brought out of retirement by Wesley Crane, and as a man of faith he finds Lord Dominicus not just obnoxious, but blasphemous.
Draven grabs Dominicus by the mask and starts tearing at it. The mask rips far enough that some of Dominicus’ hair can be seen through the rip. Crane, his becrimsoned face set in a snarl, delivers a few punches to Dominicus’ unprotected face.
Reese and Rage have been able to get Carlton’s face up against the cage. Reese has his foot against the back of Carlton’s head and has his own back against the ropes for leverage. Actual blood has joined the red markings on Carlton’s face. Rage is hanging onto Carlton’s legs.
Draven singles out Lynx, picks him up in a fireman’s carry, takes a running start, and tosses him over the ropes and back into Ring 1! He follows. Lynx is getting up, but Draven hammers him in the midsection with a body shot and then hooks a proper facelock before hitting an old school DDT - the one that somehow looks like a power move despite not lifting the opponent.
Torchwood: Timmy Draven has just marched through this match and turned things back in favor of the High Rollers.
Fulton: Crane’s on Dominicus, he’s been on Dominicus every chance he’s had.
Cage decides to try and put Rage’s The Revolution on Lady EVIL, but he’s not as experienced applying it. She counters with a small package - useless at this point - and the two end up getting up at the same time and clotheslining each other down.
Reese is still trying to work over Carlton. Carlton briefly gains the advantage by scooping Reese up on his shoulders and spearing him into the corner, but Rage is there to regain the advantage with some stomps before he can do much damage. Reese gets back into it with some hammer elbows. Then Reese holds Carlton’s arms while Rage, snarling about social justice somethingorother, lands whatever punches he can throw to Carlton’s body.
In Ring 1, Draven and Lynx are still going at it. Draven sends Lynx off the ropes and bends down for a back body drop. Lynx stops it with a big kick to the chest! But Draven is too fresh, and when Lynx runs off the ropes for momentum, Draven just follows him in and catches him with a kitchen sink knee. And then he starts going after Lynx’s mask - instead of trying to tear it, he starts trying to turn it around!
Torchwood: If Draven can pull this off, Lynx won’t be able to see!
Fulton: Can a blind cat throw a roundhouse kick?
Torchwood: He can, but it’ll be much more difficult for him to connect with it.
Tucker: We’re about to have our last man enter the match!
Draven gives up on messing with Lynx’s mask, instead delivering hammer-and-anvil elbows to Lynx, as hard and fast as he can, waiting on the timer.
TEN! NINE! EIGHT! SEVEN! SIX! FIVE! FOUR! THREE! TWO! ONE!BUZZZZZZZZ!!!!Tucker: Here comes Chapps Gluck!
Chapps doesn’t stop to take his headdress off, per se, he just knocks it off as he enters the cage. It’s probably for the best that those antlers don’t get introduced into the match anyhow.
Draven drops Lynx and squares up with Chapps. He braces as Chapps runs. But he isn’t expecting the 270 lber to leap into the air.
Tucker: Snap frankensteiner by Chapps! You just do not expect a man that size to be able to move like that!
Torchwood: And that may just be the strategy that caused Dominicus to save him for last - instead of worrying about stamina, wait for last and then have Chapps spam his flashy moves as hard and fast as possible.
Fulton: And also, the match can end now!
Draven is down holding his head. Chapps runs towards Ring 2, and at the last second, grabs the top rope and twists. He clears both sets of ropes and wipes out Rage and Reese with a tornillo! Chapps runs over to Dominicus and Crane. He spins Crane around, Crane swings with a wild haymaker that Chapps ducks, and he turns it into a high angle belly to back Gluckplex! Then he turns on Cage. German Gluckplex, but he rolls through. Instead of a second German he switches his grip to Cage’s legs, and plants him with a wheelbarrow Gluckplex!
Fulton: I guess I gotta give him credit, Chapps makes an amazing hot tag. Or hot tag equivalent. Whatever.
Torchwood: And now both teams have to try and figure out a way to win the match, which is much easier said than done with ten bodies pinballing off the walls of the cage and each other.
Tucker: And remember, pinfalls won’t do it, it has to be submission or surrender!
Chapps selects Rage as his target. He throws Rage into the gulf between the two rings and hits him with an uppercut. Rage bounces off the ropes back into another uppercut!
Draven and Lynx were getting to their feet at the same time, but Lynx was just a little bit faster. He connects with a shining wizard!
Fulton: Does Lynx have any submission finishers? I don’t think he does?
Torchwood: You often see wrestlers pull out something unusual in War Games.
Lady EVIL pulls Crane off the mat where Chapps left him and throws him into the corner. Alternating left and right elbows connect, and then a big headbutt sends blood splattering! She finishes it by Irish whipping Crane out of the corner and into Dominicus’ clutches. Dominicus turns him upside down and applies the DominiLock! But only for just a second as Crane gets loose before Dominicus can synch it all the way in. He takes Dominicus over in a crucifix and tries to turn the crucifix into a neck crank! But before he can do any damage with it, Lady EVIL knee drops him on the head.
Carlton is finally clear headed, and he slaps Chapps on the back. The two of them pick Reese up and set him up for a double suplex. Or possibly a double Gluckbuster. Cage leaps on Chapps’ back and gets both hands in Chapps’ eyes. Reese is able to hit Carlton with a tornado DDT as Chapps throws Cage off his back. Reese then, using the middle rope for a bounce, hits Chapps with a flying roundhouse kick! The kick spins Chapps around, and Reese takes him down with a Blockbuster neckbreaker!
Tucker: Bodies are everywhere! Wesley Crane’s a bloody mess! Dominicus’ mask is in tatters!
Fulton: The High Rollers got Chapps down, and that means everyone in the match has taken some punishment.
Torchwood: You’ve got to assume Crane and Dominicus would be the best targets for elimination, but there’s also Lady EVIL’s knee that the High Rollers have been trying to work over. And she and Preston Reese have both been in there for a long time as well.
Reese decides to try to get the win. He applies a judo style head scissor armbar to Carlton. Carlton gets up to his knees, Reese tries to power him back down to the mat, but Lynx spinal taps Reese and then Carlton manages to get him up high enough to powerbomb him loose. Carlton moves back into Ring 1 to brawl with Draven, but Draven kicks the ropes as Carlton comes through them. Slamming the mat with his fists for energy, Draven manages to scoop slam the big man!
Tucker: We’re losing track of who’s where!
Fulton: And they’re having that exact problem in the ring there! Every time someone starts to get worked over, one of their teammates hits a dude in the back!
Torchwood: Dominicus just springboarded… sprungboard? Either way he just dropkicked Draven before Draven could follow up on that big scoop slam!
Tucker: Lynx is throwing roundhouse kicks at everything that moves!
But when he goes for a jumping spinning one on Cage, Cage ducks. Lynx hits the mat hard and Cage scrambles into position, setting Lynx up for Two Rogers Don’t Make A Right!
Instead of immediately going for it, Cage throws his arms up to celebrate. And this gives Chapps a chance to come in behind him.
Tucker: Rebel Proud Gluckplex!
But instead of letting go like usual, Chapps hangs onto Cage’s arm and neck, rolls over on the mat, and turns it into a fulcrum choke.
Torchwood: Shades of Tamon Honda and the Rolling Olympic Hell series!
Fulton: Who and the what?!
Dominicus and Draven are tied up in Ring 1. Lady EVIL has Reese in the corner, holding onto the top rope and using it as leverage to kick him. Crane and Lynx are between the ropes and the cage, trying to force each other’s heads into the chain links. Rage sees Cage in trouble and tries to go, but Carlton grabs his arms in a double chickenwing. He then wraps his own legs around the bottom rope!
Tucker: Rage trying to go to Cage’s aid, but Carlton’s got a grip on the ropes and Rage can’t drag him!
Cage’s movement slows down as his face turns reddish purple. Then he quits moving.
Crane hears Rage yelling and turns, but he can’t get away from Lynx! Dominicus has Draven in the far side of Ring 1 where he doesn’t know what’s going on. Reese and Lady EVIL are tiredly trading shots from their knees.
Cage’s face turns from purple to blue, and one of his legs starts shaking. Rage screams in anger and tries again to reach his brother, but he can’t get out of Carlton’s grip.
Tucker: Nic Cage is out! He refused to tap and he went out instead!
Torchwood: The match can’t end on a knockout!
Cage’s face is turning from blue to gray.
Rage: LET HIM GO! SURRENDER GODDAMMIT! SURRENDER!
DING! DING! DING!The referee immediately begins prying Chapps’ arms loose from Cage’s neck. At about the same time Carlton loosens his grip enough that Rage breaks free. His own face crimson with anger, Rage stomps furiously at Chapps’ head, then switches to kicks to the ribs and finally just a blatant choke.
Tucker: Is it over?
Fulton: Does it look over?
The cage doors open and the ring floods with security. Chapps Gluck now has a significant trickle of blood running down his forehead, but he’s grinning triumphantly as the referee raises his arm. Elsewhere in the ring the other brawlers are being separated from each other.
Salazar: Here are your winners: Lord Dominicus! Lady EVIL! Lynx! And the Brothers Gluck!
The wrestlers are being escorted one by one from the cage as some medics enter to check on Nic, who’s still unconscious. One of them has an oxygen tank and Cage is quickly fitted with a mask.
Fulton: I’m sure he’ll be fine. Cage smokes enough weed he’s probably used to not getting any oxygen in the brain.
Tucker: You know, Dominicus and the Glucks don’t like each other, but when they team up they tend to win matches. Maybe they should think about that more and needle each other less?
Fulton: Maybe. Maybe it’s fucking maybeline.
