Leather, Metal, and Rocks (Chamber)
Mar 15, 2024 20:37:43 GMT -5
Mongo the Destroyer, edwarddubin0604, and 3 more like this
Post by Anthony Jordan on Mar 15, 2024 20:37:43 GMT -5
Kalmin Watts sits alone in the press area after Legacy 23. He’s still processing his return. The easy part was over. It’s simple to get one up on anyone when they aren’t expecting you. At St. Patrick’s Day Massacre, that won't be the case. Everyone will be expecting him. Kasper van Zant, Ronnie Long, Lord Dominicus, Eron Hunter, Florida Man, and Wesley Crane won’t be taken by surprise. Watts is surprised that WUK granted him entrance into the Elimination Chamber after four months away, and he intends to make the most of it.
W. Warren Webber III saunters into the interview area and finds Watts. Webber is always looking to be a stooge and gladhands Watts. Watts tolerates this for a few seconds, then pulls away. Webber does his usual schtick for the camera. The first question is unimaginative. “How’s it feel to be back?” Watts understands that it almost has to be asked, but it’s not what he wants to talk about. Still, he’ll play ball.
“Warren, it feels great. I’m all healed up and ready to resume my career in WUK!”
It’s honest, but generic. Watts is happy to be back. He loves wrestling. With his professional career about one and half years old, he’s come to appreciate the big crowds and attention. This is what it means to be at the highest level in sports.
Webber promotes the big Elimination Chamber match. Watts knows that’s why he was detained after Legacy. It’s the fight game: promote the big matches as soon as possible to make money. Webber deviates from what Watts expected and structures the interview in a way to let Watts address every participant individually. Maybe Webber is smarter than Watts assumed.
First on the list is Kasper van Zant. In Watts’s time away, she’s the one who staked her claim to the WUK World Title. She rocketed to the top in no time. She’s white hot.
“I can’t say I know Kasper all that well, but her resume speaks for itself. She’s been inspirational to a lot of people, and I like to see that in WUK. If it comes down to us in the end, I’ll fight with honor and integrity. I know she’ll do the same. While I respect her, I think the Sooner Squeeze is something she hasn’t faced before. I think that gives me an advantage.”
Webber nods. Watts found Kasper to be a challenge. He doesn’t want to brutalize her the way you can in the Chamber, but he wants to win.
Next, is Ronnie Long.
“Ronnie Long and I had an uneasy alliance last year, but I think it’s safe to say that things have changed. Ronnie is a tough, old school fighter. He’s not going to trade holds; he’s going to break bones. He has a mean streak that few can compete with. He’s probably the strongest person in this match. The only way to beat him is to take him down to the mat, which is easier said than done if five other people are in the Chamber. It wouldn’t surprise me if Ronnie eliminates the most people in the match.”
Watts is not looking forward to facing Long. Long hurts his opponents. Watts remembers a time when he rolled with a punch from Long, and it still almost knocked him out. Long is the walking definition of “old muscle”. He doesn’t have a younger man’s endurance, but he could knock anyone out with one punch.
Webber accepts Watts’s answer and moves on to Lord Dominicus.
“Lord Dominicus is one of the interlopers in this match. I remember when I first came to WUK, and he was threatening to burn it all down. One and a half years later, it’s the same story. Lord Dominicus, I have to wonder if you’re all bark and no bite. WUK has had plenty of vulnerable moments, and you haven't been able to get the job done. It ain’t happening at St. Patrick’s Day Massacre! You are on a short list of people who I can guarantee won’t win the WUK Title.
Your boogeyman act might scare the children in the crowd, but it doesn’t work on a grown man like me! You know, Lord Dominicus, if you could walk right up to me and knock my ass out, then you wouldn’t need all pathetic theatrics! You act like a Hollywood monster, but once you’re in the Chamber with me, you’ll learn that I’m the real monster!”
Dominicus makes Watts seethe. Watts sees no honor, respect, or maturity in this opponent. Dominicus tries to interject fantasy nonsense into a sport. Imagine if Patrick Mahomes sacrificed a chicken to a dark god during the Super Bowl. Watts hates Dominicus’s bullshit. Dominicus isn’t number one on the list, but he’s certainly near the top.
Webber takes the opportunity to build on Watts’s remarks. If more people watch the match because they think Watts and Dominicus will kill each other, then you know he’ll try to take credit for it. Watts doesn’t care. If Dominicus steps up to him, he’ll spend the rest of the night regretting that decision.
Webber finally moves on to Eron Hunter.
“I have nothing but respect for Eron Hunter. I hated losing my title in the three-way dance, but there wasn’t anyone better to lose it to than Eron. When I came to WUK, I was all about fairplay and doing things the right way. That wasn’t a very popular sentiment for most of the roster, but then I saw the Commonwealth Champion beat every single opponent who stepped up to him. Eron never took a shortcut. I looked up to him. I still look up to him. It’ll be an honor to wrestle him again.”
Watts is sincere. He knows Hunter will fight hard, but he won’t use any dirty tricks.
Webber knows he can’t milk that for any drama and moves on to Florida Man.
“Florida Man is probably the most polarizing man in the business. Personally, I think he’s dishonest. I have friends in other companies who talk about how Florida Man will go on TV and talking about dealing meth. I think he’s wolf in sheep’s clothing as well as another interloper in WUK. Let me be clear when I say that Florida Man will not be the next WUK World Champion!”
Watts is to the point on Florida Man. It’s because he believes Florida Man lacks the malice of others in the match, but he’s not a good man.
Webber has some fun with this. He tries to rattle some cages and makes Watts’s distaste bigger than what it is. Watts does not care. There’s one name left; the only name that matters.
Webber has his shit-eating grin as he brings up Wesley Crane. Watts cuts him off once he hears the name.
“Let me be very clear when I say this. I want to win the WUK World Title again, but I need to get my hands on Wesley Crane! ‘High Roller’, I’m not done with you by a long shot! It was your money and your plotting that put me in the hospital! I’m not coming to the Chambler to pin you. I’m not coming to the Chamber to make you tap out. I’m coming to the Chamber to make you suffer! I’m going to break your nose, bust your teeth out, crack your orbital bone, and break as many ribs as I can! Let’s see how you like being in the hospital watching the world move on without you!”
Webber can’t believe it. Why wouldn’t Watts’s primary goal be the title?
“The title is leather, metal, and rocks! If I want a belt so damn bad, I’ll go buy one! My chief concern is getting my hands on Wesley Crane, which is why I’m asking WUK to let me start the match! I don’t want Crane eliminated before I can get my hands on him! And I’m putting everyone else on notice! Kasper, Long, Dominicus, Eron, and Florida Man, keep your hands off Crane! It doesn’t matter if I like you or not, if you touch Crane, I will break you in two! Once I’m done ripping him to shreds, then you can do whatever you like, but not one damn second before!”
Webber is visibly uncomfortable hearing this from Watts. He fumbles his way through closing the interview and rushes out of the room. It is an unintended, but welcome benefit. Watts knows he got his message across. Once he gets his revenge, then everyone can involve him in the match. God have mercy on anyone foolish enough to ignore him.
W. Warren Webber III saunters into the interview area and finds Watts. Webber is always looking to be a stooge and gladhands Watts. Watts tolerates this for a few seconds, then pulls away. Webber does his usual schtick for the camera. The first question is unimaginative. “How’s it feel to be back?” Watts understands that it almost has to be asked, but it’s not what he wants to talk about. Still, he’ll play ball.
“Warren, it feels great. I’m all healed up and ready to resume my career in WUK!”
It’s honest, but generic. Watts is happy to be back. He loves wrestling. With his professional career about one and half years old, he’s come to appreciate the big crowds and attention. This is what it means to be at the highest level in sports.
Webber promotes the big Elimination Chamber match. Watts knows that’s why he was detained after Legacy. It’s the fight game: promote the big matches as soon as possible to make money. Webber deviates from what Watts expected and structures the interview in a way to let Watts address every participant individually. Maybe Webber is smarter than Watts assumed.
First on the list is Kasper van Zant. In Watts’s time away, she’s the one who staked her claim to the WUK World Title. She rocketed to the top in no time. She’s white hot.
“I can’t say I know Kasper all that well, but her resume speaks for itself. She’s been inspirational to a lot of people, and I like to see that in WUK. If it comes down to us in the end, I’ll fight with honor and integrity. I know she’ll do the same. While I respect her, I think the Sooner Squeeze is something she hasn’t faced before. I think that gives me an advantage.”
Webber nods. Watts found Kasper to be a challenge. He doesn’t want to brutalize her the way you can in the Chamber, but he wants to win.
Next, is Ronnie Long.
“Ronnie Long and I had an uneasy alliance last year, but I think it’s safe to say that things have changed. Ronnie is a tough, old school fighter. He’s not going to trade holds; he’s going to break bones. He has a mean streak that few can compete with. He’s probably the strongest person in this match. The only way to beat him is to take him down to the mat, which is easier said than done if five other people are in the Chamber. It wouldn’t surprise me if Ronnie eliminates the most people in the match.”
Watts is not looking forward to facing Long. Long hurts his opponents. Watts remembers a time when he rolled with a punch from Long, and it still almost knocked him out. Long is the walking definition of “old muscle”. He doesn’t have a younger man’s endurance, but he could knock anyone out with one punch.
Webber accepts Watts’s answer and moves on to Lord Dominicus.
“Lord Dominicus is one of the interlopers in this match. I remember when I first came to WUK, and he was threatening to burn it all down. One and a half years later, it’s the same story. Lord Dominicus, I have to wonder if you’re all bark and no bite. WUK has had plenty of vulnerable moments, and you haven't been able to get the job done. It ain’t happening at St. Patrick’s Day Massacre! You are on a short list of people who I can guarantee won’t win the WUK Title.
Your boogeyman act might scare the children in the crowd, but it doesn’t work on a grown man like me! You know, Lord Dominicus, if you could walk right up to me and knock my ass out, then you wouldn’t need all pathetic theatrics! You act like a Hollywood monster, but once you’re in the Chamber with me, you’ll learn that I’m the real monster!”
Dominicus makes Watts seethe. Watts sees no honor, respect, or maturity in this opponent. Dominicus tries to interject fantasy nonsense into a sport. Imagine if Patrick Mahomes sacrificed a chicken to a dark god during the Super Bowl. Watts hates Dominicus’s bullshit. Dominicus isn’t number one on the list, but he’s certainly near the top.
Webber takes the opportunity to build on Watts’s remarks. If more people watch the match because they think Watts and Dominicus will kill each other, then you know he’ll try to take credit for it. Watts doesn’t care. If Dominicus steps up to him, he’ll spend the rest of the night regretting that decision.
Webber finally moves on to Eron Hunter.
“I have nothing but respect for Eron Hunter. I hated losing my title in the three-way dance, but there wasn’t anyone better to lose it to than Eron. When I came to WUK, I was all about fairplay and doing things the right way. That wasn’t a very popular sentiment for most of the roster, but then I saw the Commonwealth Champion beat every single opponent who stepped up to him. Eron never took a shortcut. I looked up to him. I still look up to him. It’ll be an honor to wrestle him again.”
Watts is sincere. He knows Hunter will fight hard, but he won’t use any dirty tricks.
Webber knows he can’t milk that for any drama and moves on to Florida Man.
“Florida Man is probably the most polarizing man in the business. Personally, I think he’s dishonest. I have friends in other companies who talk about how Florida Man will go on TV and talking about dealing meth. I think he’s wolf in sheep’s clothing as well as another interloper in WUK. Let me be clear when I say that Florida Man will not be the next WUK World Champion!”
Watts is to the point on Florida Man. It’s because he believes Florida Man lacks the malice of others in the match, but he’s not a good man.
Webber has some fun with this. He tries to rattle some cages and makes Watts’s distaste bigger than what it is. Watts does not care. There’s one name left; the only name that matters.
Webber has his shit-eating grin as he brings up Wesley Crane. Watts cuts him off once he hears the name.
“Let me be very clear when I say this. I want to win the WUK World Title again, but I need to get my hands on Wesley Crane! ‘High Roller’, I’m not done with you by a long shot! It was your money and your plotting that put me in the hospital! I’m not coming to the Chambler to pin you. I’m not coming to the Chamber to make you tap out. I’m coming to the Chamber to make you suffer! I’m going to break your nose, bust your teeth out, crack your orbital bone, and break as many ribs as I can! Let’s see how you like being in the hospital watching the world move on without you!”
Webber can’t believe it. Why wouldn’t Watts’s primary goal be the title?
“The title is leather, metal, and rocks! If I want a belt so damn bad, I’ll go buy one! My chief concern is getting my hands on Wesley Crane, which is why I’m asking WUK to let me start the match! I don’t want Crane eliminated before I can get my hands on him! And I’m putting everyone else on notice! Kasper, Long, Dominicus, Eron, and Florida Man, keep your hands off Crane! It doesn’t matter if I like you or not, if you touch Crane, I will break you in two! Once I’m done ripping him to shreds, then you can do whatever you like, but not one damn second before!”
Webber is visibly uncomfortable hearing this from Watts. He fumbles his way through closing the interview and rushes out of the room. It is an unintended, but welcome benefit. Watts knows he got his message across. Once he gets his revenge, then everyone can involve him in the match. God have mercy on anyone foolish enough to ignore him.