Sing a Song for the Bad Men

[Kasper Van Slam]

...The Interview…

The scene opens once again in the camper of WUK World Heavyweight Champion Kasper Van Zant. The camper had been spruced up a little with some strung up purple and red Christmas lights, a few silver bows with silver tinsel that reflected off the camper top, and a “fancy banner” that read - ’WUK SPECIAL INTERVIEW’. The Champ, Kasper, and WUK interviewer Katie Moss sit side by side on “fancy folding chairs” both looking slightly uncomfortable. Between them folded upon the swinging camper table top is the WUK Heavyweight belt.

KM: ”Thank you for taking time out of your busy schedule Kasper to have this interview.”

Kasper smiles, more like smirks as she adjusts the skirt of the dress she's wearing.

KVZ: ”...Well I have a lot to say, and I wanted you to get the story fairly from my point of view.”

KM: ”And what is the story you want to share? Surely it isn't bigger than the upcoming Chamber match?”

KVZ: ”No…no maybe it isn't as big as the Chamber match but maybe I should rephrase: I want to bring to everyone's attention the awareness of change.”

KM: ”Change?”

KVZ: ”Oh yes, changes in the status quo of not just WUK but the wrestling world in general; No one wants to talk about it or give me credit where credit is due so I gotta tell them and I'll start with simple facts: did you know I'm the youngest AND the only woman to hold this belt in the company? I accomplished this before I've even been here a year!”

KM: ”So the change is: I am here, I am woman, hear me cry?”

KVZ: ”Exactly! Bring the bread and the roses boys because the time of dominate old men is over; And its funny enough that Mr. Blood is trying to bury me for it, I mean I was basically the opening match last Legacy! The CHAMP, the face of the company and rising star of WUK was second on the card slapped into a match with a man I hadn't ever heard of until the card was announced, but once again Crane was forced down our throats as always with a third tier title as the main event…oh and guess who got hurt because of it? Eli Dresden! CaN't HaVe TwO wOmErNs In ThE mAiN eVeNt…”

Kasper said mockingly.

KVZ: ”No offense to you Miss Moss…Crane being your ‘man friend’...”

Katie Moss clears her throat smiling.

KM: ”None taken Kasper, I'm a professional…”

Kasper leaned forward patting Katie Moss on the hand, excitement lit up her face.

KVZ: ”A professional woman in a field once again filled by horny men or women forced to play ditzy dumb blonde, out here doing her job…I get it…they wanted Webber to give this interview but I said NO. I wanted you, I told them I wanted you to do it because you will understand…as a woman…where I'm coming from. I don't have to worry about getting eye molested with you. No mansplaining.”

KM: ”Thank you Kasper…that's all very true, I think the changes you are proposing sound valid; fair.”

KVZ: ”Equality. Is that too much to ask for? I mean sure we have the freedom to lace up our boots and climb into that ring but we are more than midcard sluts...always getting close but not close enough for example; Sinclair Godfrey is a hell of a champion but she can be more…Olympia…more…anyways you get what I'm saying and I hope by doing what I'm doing, what hell I'll endure in that Chamber will inspire other women to get the HELL OUT OF THE SHADOWS of men.”

Katie Moss sits up a little straighter, confident.

KM: ”I support it Kasper, truly inspiring! But as said, the hell you'll endure, to seal your legacy the Camber sounds like the perfect platform to do so…but it will be hell, six hungry testosterone filled men want your belt, so let's start with the man you took the title from: Eron Hunter?”

KVZ: ’I love Hunter first of all, easily one of the most recognized hardest working, diligent, and respectful men in the business. He's been around a long time and I had the honor to get in the ring with him and 1…2..3…I beat him. He made me earn it without feeling like it was wrong that it wasn't a fluke, he made me feel valid even when I picked him a part. He's a challenge I welcome any day…”

KM: ”Well let's talk about some of the competition you've never faced? Kalmin Watts for starters, he didn't really seem to have a problem with you and much like Eron, he'll take you on with honor but he really wants his hands on Crane…your archenemy…”

Kasper smirks and holds her hands up, a show of surrender.

KVZ: ”Hey that big hunk of man has my blessing, tear Wesley Crane apart, the man deserves it…again no offense to you…but let's be realistic here, once we're in that Chamber everyone is fair game. I'm the Champ here big papa and I'm going to do what I need to do to make sure it's me retaining, I can't put my fate or stake in this match in his wants.”

KM: ”No damsel here, I hear you…”

KVZ: ”Absolutely not, *Kasper stands and flexes the full scope of her muscular range*, I am no timid dainty flower Miss Moss! I don't need protectors and I don't need men like Watts thinking his threats or declaration of who gets what is happening.”

KM: ”Moving on, where do your feelings fall going against one time ally Lord Dominicus? He boldly claims you are where you are because of him, Lord Dominicus the Puppeteer per say.”

Kasper had to sit and laugh.

KVZ: ”No. False, does that mean he'll take credit for my failures? Because Dominicus I have a discrepancies with your finite ’prowess’. I earned this on my own. I beat Crane on my own. I beat Eron Hunter on my own. Sure without me and that silly mask you loaned me, you wouldn't have beat Crane the first time without Lady Evil and all involved you wouldn't have beat the High Rollers at all dirty D. I gotta agree with Watts assessment about men like Dominicus, Florida Man, and Ronnie Long…their interlopers…hindrances to those of us that matter. If I didn't have this around my waist Miss Moss where do you think I'd be at St. Patrick’s Day Massacre? Blood is such a pig, I can guarantee I wouldn't have been a replacement candidate!”

Katie Moss leans forward in her own chair now.

KM: ”We know you have some grievances against the last opponent I'm about to ask about, Wesley Crane.”

Kasper shifted in her fold out chair and she actually grabbed the belt, placing it in her lap. She may have been smiling but it wasn't friendly.

KVZ: ”Fuck Wesley Crane. I don't think he can fathom the world of shit that's tumbling down hill towards him! The man is marked and he's so arrogant about it; something that boils down to one big insecurity: he's a man afraid of a woman. Do you not feel like an object, Miss Moss?”

KM: ”I…I'm not sure what you mean?”

Kasper holds up the belt.

KVZ: ”Naomi? He personified this belt as a woman, why? Because women are objects to be used and abused by him! I'm the wannabe champion, I didn't beat him, and I don't belong simply because I'm a woman who he can't conquer...if Crane had been able to seal the deal in our first blood and it was him that went on to face Hunter, what tune would Crane be singing?”

KM: ”If it had been him that had cut you first all would have been fair and right?”

Kasper clapped in excitement.

KVZ: ”EXACTLY! All would be right in Cranes world but he couldn't MAKE ME BLEED! HE FAILED! The match was a first blood for fucks sake, should I mansplain to him what that means? These men will cling to any self created pride and think I mean nothing more or nothing less, Matsui for example? The coward couldn't beat me and he knew it so he got himself disqualified like a coward, I'm sure he'll Crane the situation in his favor…”

Kasper pats her title.

KVZ: ”I know this match isn't going to be easy for me and I never will say it will but I will forge forward and I'll lace up my boots, I'll climb in that Chamber and like Hunter…like Watts…I will leave it all out there at St. Patrick’s Day Massacre for the women of the wrestling world both the little girls that look up to me every night I get in a ring, to the women who have to endure the same fight I do in this business…we women sing a song for the bad men, and I hope it's just as uncomfortable as it is to lose to a little girl…”

The scene fades slowly with Kasper confidently staring into the souls of the six men she'd be seeing very soon.