An Update on Food Shortages and the Rumble (Edmund/TagBelts)
Apr 7, 2024 22:40:42 GMT -5
Mongo the Destroyer and mosler like this
Post by ForeverKuroi on Apr 7, 2024 22:40:42 GMT -5
The scene fades in. The sun shines brightly on Supremia in every way except the way that matters. Guards viciously attack commoners who try to survive. They are extra vicious today, a day where King Edmund IV decides to take a stroll through Silvercrest. In this inhospitable hellhole, a calorie is worth more than a fortune. And Silvercrest is where the elite of Supremia live. Those who fall down even further live in the outskirts of the country, where life is even worse. King Edmund walks with more purpose than he normally does. His loyal attendant, Mutt, is with him. He approaches one of the large stages within the common. Though normally a soapbox for his entertainers, King Edmund IV uses it to send today’s message.
King Edmund IV: SUPREMIA! Your KING is here! I guess some of you know me as King Edmund the FOURTH, but whatever.
At this point, the masses don’t even have too much hope to give. Long are the days of praying for good news. If they ever placed in a god, it has done little to reward their piety.
King Edmund IV: I wanted to give everyone an update and be forthcoming with what's going on in Supremia. Yes. I was the one holding up more imports of food. Everyone else on Supremian imports had their act together on the proper day. I still need to finish the diplomacy with neighboring countries and am working on the treaties with the Netherlands. As you know, the original delay on this move was for very good reasons and as any good Supremian can tell you, we took the news of gold and GLORY to Supremia with celebration! I didn't have the energy to try to appease other countries ahead of time.
A Supremian royal guard strikes the pommel of his sword to a commoner’s belly, whose stomach grumbled too loudly.
King Edmund IV: Now I assumed CONTROL of this CHAMPIONSHIP back in December, and I’m sure that you can all appreciate that this has been doing wonders for my mental health and my time at the capitol with my LOYAL subjects! Alas, it also means that I have less time to set aside for here as I have been mainly governing on the weekends as, thanks to the constant travel with Supremian Airlines. …Heckin’ airline food. I routinely get home late, have to change my mind on which political prisoner to execute before immediately getting cooked dinner and then enjoying my evening with Mutt. I am usually free at 1800 and within moments, I am much too tired to do anything. This is, of course, because I need to preserve my strength to HONOR… SUPREMIA!
Those last two words are immediately chanted by the rest of the crowd, under fear of assault by the guards. One guard immediately drags a Supremian commoner through the streets, likely one who didn’t chant loudly or enthusiastically enough. Their fate will likely never be known, only guessed.
King Edmund IV: This week we have been dealing with an injured and sick Mutt, and he has REALLY been disturbing my sleep schedule. He’s becoming a senior. Perhaps he is no longer going to be my protege for too much longer. Apologies. But it’s OK. I have been training him in this gym regimen and he has complained about some back, neck, and/or calf pain. Even without the ability to speak, he relays his message very well. Bless. So when you all have been complaining about you not being fed like such entitled FOOLS you have been, I had to be CHARITABLE, just like the good KING I AM! I have to sit with him, and it really gave me such a migraine. You spoiled peasants want your imports, but I refuse to rush completion. Normally, I would pawn this work to one of my officers, but to be PERFECTLY HONEST, I’ve put too much work into ordering some new pens and taking calligraphy classes so that I can choose the right words to speak with the Dutch officials. I’m working out a document with my flow and I want this success to be OURS.
King Edmund smiles to the rest of the crowd.
King Edmund IV: Enough about this. Let’s talk about what’s really important. I have a match at the XHF Rumble. In fact, I have TWO. AND I WILL WIN BOTH! But I need to focus my attention on two people who will face my wrath quite specifically. Wait, did I say people? I mean bears. Did I say bears? I MEANT PEASANTS! BRITTNEY AND ABBY BEAHR!
King Edmund was quite literally frothing at the mouth with that last line like a rabid animal. Not that there are many animals in Supremia with widespread hunger afflicting the country. However, any animals that do live there are likely diseased in some manner.
King Edmund IV: Now, bears. I VERY MUCH APOLOGIZE if me holding the belts slows down any of your belt-specific dreams. Wait. NO I DON’T. YOU TWO SUCK! You should take a little time for your real life, if for the first time in your twenty years of existence. When the XHF Rumble arrives, I will not rush to finish the match immediately. I will not rush to put up with a weak showing. I will be WORKING on beating you up and putting an end to your puny rebellion. So to temper expectations, here’s my timeline for the show.
King Edmund reaches into his pocket and pulls out a piece of paper. He reads it off.
King Edmund IV: There’s a slim chance I can get it up tomorro-
King Edmund realizes what he was reading and quickly shoves it back into his pocket. He pulls out a different piece of paper.
King Edmund IV: There’s a fifty-fifty shot that I’m going to beat you up immediately. It depends on how I feel, because I’m getting a migraine just looking at you and it may be better to just end it like the endangered animals you are. BUT THE PEOPLE DESERVE BETTER! Again, I don’t apologize if you feel slighted. Having to celebrate being a champion and represent SUPREMIA to the rest of the world has been physically draining for me the past few months and while this will be chronic, as my reign of glory will be ENDLESS, it is nonetheless iconic. My celebration party for retaining the XHF Tag Team Championship isn't until mid-May.
King Edmund signals the end of the speech, causing a compulsory mass-applause. He smiles before walking off the stage, before quickly returning for one more message.
King Edmund IV: And no I didn't clear this with Bud Light Year first, I want to make sure he doesn't steal the credit for winning this match from me as I've put in a lot of work to shine light upon Supremia. So if you’re seeing this, Bud, you can simply find yourself lucky to revel within my light!
King Edmund pulls up one of the XHF Tag Team Championships and rises it high up in the air. The belts obscure the light beaming down from beneath Edmund. The scene fades to black.
King Edmund IV: SUPREMIA! Your KING is here! I guess some of you know me as King Edmund the FOURTH, but whatever.
At this point, the masses don’t even have too much hope to give. Long are the days of praying for good news. If they ever placed in a god, it has done little to reward their piety.
King Edmund IV: I wanted to give everyone an update and be forthcoming with what's going on in Supremia. Yes. I was the one holding up more imports of food. Everyone else on Supremian imports had their act together on the proper day. I still need to finish the diplomacy with neighboring countries and am working on the treaties with the Netherlands. As you know, the original delay on this move was for very good reasons and as any good Supremian can tell you, we took the news of gold and GLORY to Supremia with celebration! I didn't have the energy to try to appease other countries ahead of time.
A Supremian royal guard strikes the pommel of his sword to a commoner’s belly, whose stomach grumbled too loudly.
King Edmund IV: Now I assumed CONTROL of this CHAMPIONSHIP back in December, and I’m sure that you can all appreciate that this has been doing wonders for my mental health and my time at the capitol with my LOYAL subjects! Alas, it also means that I have less time to set aside for here as I have been mainly governing on the weekends as, thanks to the constant travel with Supremian Airlines. …Heckin’ airline food. I routinely get home late, have to change my mind on which political prisoner to execute before immediately getting cooked dinner and then enjoying my evening with Mutt. I am usually free at 1800 and within moments, I am much too tired to do anything. This is, of course, because I need to preserve my strength to HONOR… SUPREMIA!
Those last two words are immediately chanted by the rest of the crowd, under fear of assault by the guards. One guard immediately drags a Supremian commoner through the streets, likely one who didn’t chant loudly or enthusiastically enough. Their fate will likely never be known, only guessed.
King Edmund IV: This week we have been dealing with an injured and sick Mutt, and he has REALLY been disturbing my sleep schedule. He’s becoming a senior. Perhaps he is no longer going to be my protege for too much longer. Apologies. But it’s OK. I have been training him in this gym regimen and he has complained about some back, neck, and/or calf pain. Even without the ability to speak, he relays his message very well. Bless. So when you all have been complaining about you not being fed like such entitled FOOLS you have been, I had to be CHARITABLE, just like the good KING I AM! I have to sit with him, and it really gave me such a migraine. You spoiled peasants want your imports, but I refuse to rush completion. Normally, I would pawn this work to one of my officers, but to be PERFECTLY HONEST, I’ve put too much work into ordering some new pens and taking calligraphy classes so that I can choose the right words to speak with the Dutch officials. I’m working out a document with my flow and I want this success to be OURS.
King Edmund smiles to the rest of the crowd.
King Edmund IV: Enough about this. Let’s talk about what’s really important. I have a match at the XHF Rumble. In fact, I have TWO. AND I WILL WIN BOTH! But I need to focus my attention on two people who will face my wrath quite specifically. Wait, did I say people? I mean bears. Did I say bears? I MEANT PEASANTS! BRITTNEY AND ABBY BEAHR!
King Edmund was quite literally frothing at the mouth with that last line like a rabid animal. Not that there are many animals in Supremia with widespread hunger afflicting the country. However, any animals that do live there are likely diseased in some manner.
King Edmund IV: Now, bears. I VERY MUCH APOLOGIZE if me holding the belts slows down any of your belt-specific dreams. Wait. NO I DON’T. YOU TWO SUCK! You should take a little time for your real life, if for the first time in your twenty years of existence. When the XHF Rumble arrives, I will not rush to finish the match immediately. I will not rush to put up with a weak showing. I will be WORKING on beating you up and putting an end to your puny rebellion. So to temper expectations, here’s my timeline for the show.
King Edmund reaches into his pocket and pulls out a piece of paper. He reads it off.
King Edmund IV: There’s a slim chance I can get it up tomorro-
King Edmund realizes what he was reading and quickly shoves it back into his pocket. He pulls out a different piece of paper.
King Edmund IV: There’s a fifty-fifty shot that I’m going to beat you up immediately. It depends on how I feel, because I’m getting a migraine just looking at you and it may be better to just end it like the endangered animals you are. BUT THE PEOPLE DESERVE BETTER! Again, I don’t apologize if you feel slighted. Having to celebrate being a champion and represent SUPREMIA to the rest of the world has been physically draining for me the past few months and while this will be chronic, as my reign of glory will be ENDLESS, it is nonetheless iconic. My celebration party for retaining the XHF Tag Team Championship isn't until mid-May.
King Edmund signals the end of the speech, causing a compulsory mass-applause. He smiles before walking off the stage, before quickly returning for one more message.
King Edmund IV: And no I didn't clear this with Bud Light Year first, I want to make sure he doesn't steal the credit for winning this match from me as I've put in a lot of work to shine light upon Supremia. So if you’re seeing this, Bud, you can simply find yourself lucky to revel within my light!
King Edmund pulls up one of the XHF Tag Team Championships and rises it high up in the air. The belts obscure the light beaming down from beneath Edmund. The scene fades to black.
