Triptych (EoD X RP)
Oct 22, 2017 2:49:48 GMT -5
Mongo the Destroyer, Slainmaker, and 1 more like this
Post by Curtis D. Kanyon on Oct 22, 2017 2:49:48 GMT -5
**Fade in. Casa de Kanyon. Hallway.**
Curtis: Hello, is it me you’re looking for!? Sorry, I thought that would be a good start, too cheesy?
*Oh, you’re such a cheeky monkey Curtis! And you started before I could! We see Curtis in the hallway of his humble abode. Family pictures adorn the walls.*
Curtis: Listen here people, I wanted to invite you into my home to show you something. If you would just follow me.
*Curtis beckons the camera to follow as he heads down the hallway. Curtis opens a door and enters a room. The camera enters after him and we see what looks to be a child’s bedroom. There’s a small bed, toys are strewn about along the floor. But the most interesting thing is that there are a few Thob posters on the wall. A Thob plush toy with multiple types of armor on the desk, sort of like Build-A-Bear, but with a pig.*
Curtis: Look at this! LOOK AT THIS! This is wrong, this is all wrong! We can’t let a pig be the face of professional wrestling! And here she is, Thob in all her glory, one letter off from my diety, spitting in his face! Destroying the greatness of battle and the greatness of the challenge and the greatness of the X*Crown. Slain and all his wiley-ness is just jumping shark after shark after shark! And the kids are eating it up! What’s next? Are we going to be fighting Kangaroos? Wallabies? Koalas? Hopefully not Platypi, those bastards are deadly.
*Um, we’re not in Australia, so I don’t know why it’s skewed that way. Curtis sits on the bed.*
Curtis: What a shame! I mean, my littlest child Pepito, he should be idolizing Jackson Steele. If not him, Miguel Storm, or maybe Buddy Burette. Heck, I’d even be okay with Azrial! But Thob? Sure, she’s one step above that blasphemer Hyperion, but Thob? A pig that just…sit’s there! And that buffoon Slain who throws Thob around! It astounds me! It baffles me! Why? Just…why!? Well, that’s going to change at End of Days, because End of Days is your end of days Thob and/or Slain! And the end of your days begins the days of my days that people previously thought were ended days! I’m going to take that X*Crown, I’m going to be the hero that the kids of this world deserve! I’m going to show them that fighting and battling for honor is the way to go! Persevering and pushing through and destroying other warriors is all that and the bag of chips! I will slaughter Thob! I will slay Slain! I will give one a warrior’s death, and the other I will throw to the side like the peace of trash that he is!
*Yes, Curtis said “he.”*
Curtis: Because as lame as Thob may be, at least she has an accomplishment! Slain is just riding the coat tails of an animal that sits there. When Slain has been relegated to the dumpster he belongs in, Thob will be easy pickings and I will stand triumphant! I will be on kid’s walls! I will be the one my child roots for! I will end this charade once and for all and set things right in this world! This is your Ragnarok Thob, so enjoy your days.
*Curtis gets up and goes over to a poster, looking to be ready to rip it off the wall, but stops himself short.*
Curtis: I want to tear this sucker down, but I can’t. It won’t mean the same as it will when I inspire my own son to tear it down. After End of Days, he will.
**Fade out**
**Fade in. Casa de Kanyon. Dining Room**
*Still in Kanyon's mansion, we know find Curtis sitting at the table, looking through some mail.*
Curtis: Bill, residual, bill, JoAnn's coupon, bill, hmm, oh yes, hello there. Who's this about now, Harry or Venom? I guess Venom next.
*Curtis puts the mail down and stands up, walking around the table into the adjoining room, speaking as he goes.*
Curtis: Venom, V-nom, Venominal, Young Gun #2. You have a legacy, a storied XHF history. We've crossed paths. It sure is good to see you up and at them again. Still looking as masterful as ever in that ring. Good job!
*Curtis gives a slow clap as the room he enters opens up to reveal it’s the trophy room.*
Curtis: We've crossed paths before, you and I. But it's been a long time. I grew, I changed, I became more bad ass. Then I retired. Now I'm back. And I haven't skipped a beat. I just beat twelve of the best wrestlers AWF had to offer. You... haven't changed since last I saw you, which is still great, but all these years, you've only plateaud. My stock goes up and up, and your stock is still where it was in 2007.
*Curtis looks over at his case of title belts he's held. You've got a Hardcore title, a European title, a US title, a few tag team titles from XHF. Not to brag, but he also has a few NCW tag titles, an NCW world title, and three hall of fame rings. Also, a blonde wig.*
Curtis: I know that my championship case isn't as bountiful as yours, yet. But it's about to have eighteen more titles. It has room to grow! Your case, I'm afraid, won't need to be any bigger Venom.
*Curtis continues to walk through the room. Magazines that he's graced the cover of are hanging on the wall. He stops short of a giant portrait of his older brother, Chris Kanyon.*
Curtis: As the next of kin, I inherited my brothers stuff too. I believe you ran into him a lot more than you ran into me. I've got his US title, his broken US title, his XHF world title. His Back to the Future 4 memorabilia, and so much more. He was a he'll of a hand, ahead of his time. Yes, we all know Chris was a great man. And after he left us, I tried to move up and take his place. But those were big shoes to fill. At first, it was hard. To be as brilliant and innovative as him. I won't lie, I cracked under pressure at first. But you gotta break a few eggs to get over that fence.
*That's not how it goes.*
Curtis: I learned, and I rebuilt myself. I BECAME A BREAKER OF WORLDS! And I made it to the mountain top. I pushed harder and harder until frankly, there was nothing left to prove in NCW. How did you do over there again? So I left and became a believer, backer, and buyer of all things fish attractant and made my family even richer! What have you done in your time off? I thought I was done in wrestling, but I heard XHF was making a comeback, and I knew if it did, I'd have a few more goals re-open to accomplish. And then, less than a month after stepping back in the ring, I earn my X*Crown shot in a grueling match delivering a mighty BANG! to many a man. How did you earn your place in this match?
*Curtis continues to walk down the room, revealing a Burger King Whopper trophy, a framed certificate of "None Betta" from Kraft, and an assortment of other items from he and his brother's endorsement deals. How big is this room?
P.S. We see through a window behind Curtis that the Dirty Deal RV is still parked out front. Extreme Call Back!*
Curtis: Your plateau is still a fantastic wrestler and our battle will be glorious. Thor will weep at the beauty of the battle we have. It's unfortunate a pig and a piece of trash must taint it with their involvement. But at the end of the End of Days day, I will stand tall and eighteen...times twenty-five...carry the... Uh... A lot of pounds heavier from all that gold!
*Curtis smirks as the scene fades.*
**Fade out.
Fade in. Casa de Kanyon. A door.**
*The camera is zoomed in on a door. A few seconds of silence. Then, we here the flush of a toilet. A running faucet. Then the door opens. It's Curtis!*
Curtis: Ah, hello again. That turd reminded me, I still need to talk about Harold. Harry...
*Curtis walks down the hallway.*
Curtis: Now, unlike most warriors, I pride myself on being willing to sink to whatever the lowest depths my opponent does. And Harry is the lowest of the low, so any little kids tuned into the network best turn the dial right now! And Kira, let me show ya how it's done. Three... Two... One...
*Curtis walks to the end of the hallway, looks around to make sure his kids aren't around, and then turns to the camera.*
Curtis: Hardcore Harry, nobody fucking needs you. You want to know why? I'll tell you why! Because you're a dirty cunt. Some people may have labeled your ass "Mr. XHF." Well, it damn sure isn't "Mr. XHF Network" because if so, it would have failed before it started. Do you know how far you would have to fall for me to be more worried about a skinny prick with a fucking pig than to be worried about you? Hell, we'll be lucky if you even show up sober! This fucking match might be called Gold War, but it should be called, Who Pins Harry the Most?
*Ouch, that hurts. Kanyon moves into the Den. How many rooms does this place have?
Curtis: Harry, you were an icon of this industry. You were a wrestler to be feared. Now...you're the guy who lost the most prestigious title we got ...to a pig. I mean, is there really any more I need to say after that? I mean, you're a shit sandwich wrapped in turd bacon. You are the prince of "You Fucked Up" City. If you have a modicum of decency, you will show up and salvage whatever shreds of a career you have left and give the fight of your life. I'm not expecting it, but I want it. I don't want you to lay there in your own puke as the rest of us gets to fight over who pins you, but I know that's the most likely scenario. When you got pinned by Thob, you created the darkest timeline Harry, and my god has gifted me the chance to set it right. Thor knows I am needed in this fight to correct the balance of things that you fucking screwed up Harry! So I suppose I should thank you for giving me the opportunity to jump in so quickly to take the X*Crown. In your failure, you have led to great things. And you know, sometimes we must take a step back to take a leap forward. You'll always be known for being the catalyst to that step back Harry, so take some comfort in that. But realize that in the end Harry...
*You're going to have to follow me on this one. The screen now shrinks to one third size, the middle third is filled with Curtis as well, standing in his trophy room.*
Curtis: Venom...
*The final third is filled with Curtis in Pepito's bedroom.*
Curtis: Thob and Slain...
Curtis, Curtis, & Curtis: You will ...feel ...the ... BANG!
**Fade out.**
Curtis: Hello, is it me you’re looking for!? Sorry, I thought that would be a good start, too cheesy?
*Oh, you’re such a cheeky monkey Curtis! And you started before I could! We see Curtis in the hallway of his humble abode. Family pictures adorn the walls.*
Curtis: Listen here people, I wanted to invite you into my home to show you something. If you would just follow me.
*Curtis beckons the camera to follow as he heads down the hallway. Curtis opens a door and enters a room. The camera enters after him and we see what looks to be a child’s bedroom. There’s a small bed, toys are strewn about along the floor. But the most interesting thing is that there are a few Thob posters on the wall. A Thob plush toy with multiple types of armor on the desk, sort of like Build-A-Bear, but with a pig.*
Curtis: Look at this! LOOK AT THIS! This is wrong, this is all wrong! We can’t let a pig be the face of professional wrestling! And here she is, Thob in all her glory, one letter off from my diety, spitting in his face! Destroying the greatness of battle and the greatness of the challenge and the greatness of the X*Crown. Slain and all his wiley-ness is just jumping shark after shark after shark! And the kids are eating it up! What’s next? Are we going to be fighting Kangaroos? Wallabies? Koalas? Hopefully not Platypi, those bastards are deadly.
*Um, we’re not in Australia, so I don’t know why it’s skewed that way. Curtis sits on the bed.*
Curtis: What a shame! I mean, my littlest child Pepito, he should be idolizing Jackson Steele. If not him, Miguel Storm, or maybe Buddy Burette. Heck, I’d even be okay with Azrial! But Thob? Sure, she’s one step above that blasphemer Hyperion, but Thob? A pig that just…sit’s there! And that buffoon Slain who throws Thob around! It astounds me! It baffles me! Why? Just…why!? Well, that’s going to change at End of Days, because End of Days is your end of days Thob and/or Slain! And the end of your days begins the days of my days that people previously thought were ended days! I’m going to take that X*Crown, I’m going to be the hero that the kids of this world deserve! I’m going to show them that fighting and battling for honor is the way to go! Persevering and pushing through and destroying other warriors is all that and the bag of chips! I will slaughter Thob! I will slay Slain! I will give one a warrior’s death, and the other I will throw to the side like the peace of trash that he is!
*Yes, Curtis said “he.”*
Curtis: Because as lame as Thob may be, at least she has an accomplishment! Slain is just riding the coat tails of an animal that sits there. When Slain has been relegated to the dumpster he belongs in, Thob will be easy pickings and I will stand triumphant! I will be on kid’s walls! I will be the one my child roots for! I will end this charade once and for all and set things right in this world! This is your Ragnarok Thob, so enjoy your days.
*Curtis gets up and goes over to a poster, looking to be ready to rip it off the wall, but stops himself short.*
Curtis: I want to tear this sucker down, but I can’t. It won’t mean the same as it will when I inspire my own son to tear it down. After End of Days, he will.
**Fade out**
**Fade in. Casa de Kanyon. Dining Room**
*Still in Kanyon's mansion, we know find Curtis sitting at the table, looking through some mail.*
Curtis: Bill, residual, bill, JoAnn's coupon, bill, hmm, oh yes, hello there. Who's this about now, Harry or Venom? I guess Venom next.
*Curtis puts the mail down and stands up, walking around the table into the adjoining room, speaking as he goes.*
Curtis: Venom, V-nom, Venominal, Young Gun #2. You have a legacy, a storied XHF history. We've crossed paths. It sure is good to see you up and at them again. Still looking as masterful as ever in that ring. Good job!
*Curtis gives a slow clap as the room he enters opens up to reveal it’s the trophy room.*
Curtis: We've crossed paths before, you and I. But it's been a long time. I grew, I changed, I became more bad ass. Then I retired. Now I'm back. And I haven't skipped a beat. I just beat twelve of the best wrestlers AWF had to offer. You... haven't changed since last I saw you, which is still great, but all these years, you've only plateaud. My stock goes up and up, and your stock is still where it was in 2007.
*Curtis looks over at his case of title belts he's held. You've got a Hardcore title, a European title, a US title, a few tag team titles from XHF. Not to brag, but he also has a few NCW tag titles, an NCW world title, and three hall of fame rings. Also, a blonde wig.*
Curtis: I know that my championship case isn't as bountiful as yours, yet. But it's about to have eighteen more titles. It has room to grow! Your case, I'm afraid, won't need to be any bigger Venom.
*Curtis continues to walk through the room. Magazines that he's graced the cover of are hanging on the wall. He stops short of a giant portrait of his older brother, Chris Kanyon.*
Curtis: As the next of kin, I inherited my brothers stuff too. I believe you ran into him a lot more than you ran into me. I've got his US title, his broken US title, his XHF world title. His Back to the Future 4 memorabilia, and so much more. He was a he'll of a hand, ahead of his time. Yes, we all know Chris was a great man. And after he left us, I tried to move up and take his place. But those were big shoes to fill. At first, it was hard. To be as brilliant and innovative as him. I won't lie, I cracked under pressure at first. But you gotta break a few eggs to get over that fence.
*That's not how it goes.*
Curtis: I learned, and I rebuilt myself. I BECAME A BREAKER OF WORLDS! And I made it to the mountain top. I pushed harder and harder until frankly, there was nothing left to prove in NCW. How did you do over there again? So I left and became a believer, backer, and buyer of all things fish attractant and made my family even richer! What have you done in your time off? I thought I was done in wrestling, but I heard XHF was making a comeback, and I knew if it did, I'd have a few more goals re-open to accomplish. And then, less than a month after stepping back in the ring, I earn my X*Crown shot in a grueling match delivering a mighty BANG! to many a man. How did you earn your place in this match?
*Curtis continues to walk down the room, revealing a Burger King Whopper trophy, a framed certificate of "None Betta" from Kraft, and an assortment of other items from he and his brother's endorsement deals. How big is this room?
P.S. We see through a window behind Curtis that the Dirty Deal RV is still parked out front. Extreme Call Back!*
Curtis: Your plateau is still a fantastic wrestler and our battle will be glorious. Thor will weep at the beauty of the battle we have. It's unfortunate a pig and a piece of trash must taint it with their involvement. But at the end of the End of Days day, I will stand tall and eighteen...times twenty-five...carry the... Uh... A lot of pounds heavier from all that gold!
*Curtis smirks as the scene fades.*
**Fade out.
Fade in. Casa de Kanyon. A door.**
*The camera is zoomed in on a door. A few seconds of silence. Then, we here the flush of a toilet. A running faucet. Then the door opens. It's Curtis!*
Curtis: Ah, hello again. That turd reminded me, I still need to talk about Harold. Harry...
*Curtis walks down the hallway.*
Curtis: Now, unlike most warriors, I pride myself on being willing to sink to whatever the lowest depths my opponent does. And Harry is the lowest of the low, so any little kids tuned into the network best turn the dial right now! And Kira, let me show ya how it's done. Three... Two... One...
*Curtis walks to the end of the hallway, looks around to make sure his kids aren't around, and then turns to the camera.*
Curtis: Hardcore Harry, nobody fucking needs you. You want to know why? I'll tell you why! Because you're a dirty cunt. Some people may have labeled your ass "Mr. XHF." Well, it damn sure isn't "Mr. XHF Network" because if so, it would have failed before it started. Do you know how far you would have to fall for me to be more worried about a skinny prick with a fucking pig than to be worried about you? Hell, we'll be lucky if you even show up sober! This fucking match might be called Gold War, but it should be called, Who Pins Harry the Most?
*Ouch, that hurts. Kanyon moves into the Den. How many rooms does this place have?
Curtis: Harry, you were an icon of this industry. You were a wrestler to be feared. Now...you're the guy who lost the most prestigious title we got ...to a pig. I mean, is there really any more I need to say after that? I mean, you're a shit sandwich wrapped in turd bacon. You are the prince of "You Fucked Up" City. If you have a modicum of decency, you will show up and salvage whatever shreds of a career you have left and give the fight of your life. I'm not expecting it, but I want it. I don't want you to lay there in your own puke as the rest of us gets to fight over who pins you, but I know that's the most likely scenario. When you got pinned by Thob, you created the darkest timeline Harry, and my god has gifted me the chance to set it right. Thor knows I am needed in this fight to correct the balance of things that you fucking screwed up Harry! So I suppose I should thank you for giving me the opportunity to jump in so quickly to take the X*Crown. In your failure, you have led to great things. And you know, sometimes we must take a step back to take a leap forward. You'll always be known for being the catalyst to that step back Harry, so take some comfort in that. But realize that in the end Harry...
*You're going to have to follow me on this one. The screen now shrinks to one third size, the middle third is filled with Curtis as well, standing in his trophy room.*
Curtis: Venom...
*The final third is filled with Curtis in Pepito's bedroom.*
Curtis: Thob and Slain...
Curtis, Curtis, & Curtis: You will ...feel ...the ... BANG!
**Fade out.**
