Post by adam on Feb 1, 2018 15:37:16 GMT -5
You have to be knocked down before you can get back up.
It’s been a long time since I’ve stepped into that ring, ever since that night I blew out my knee. Has to be almost three years now… who knows… maybe they’ve already forgotten my name, maybe they’ve moved on to the latest “hot chick” to take the stage, maybe my fleeting fifteen minutes of fame are truly gone and past?
NCW seems so long ago. Seems like it’s been forever since I was that teenage girl who swept through the NCW tournament to become the first Starlet’s Champion. I never stepped foot in an IWF ring as an active competitor… I won’t go into the details of way, but considering how my career turned from that point maybe I should have. Maybe I wouldn’t have shredded everything inside my knee if I was working with safer competition… then again… Ana Valentine probably would have hired a hitman to take me out since I would have clearly been a roadblock on her path to success… or… you know what this is pointless… Everything, so they say, happens for a reason… and somehow this feels right… the right place to restart this career of mine.
We open up to a scene, one that happened a couple of months ago but for some reason was recorded. Why? Who knows… but it’s here ok? Anyway… We can see our ever charismatic heroine of these stories, Zelda Knite, laying on a couch with a video game controller in her hands. Laying in the floor in front of her and scattered around the coffee table before that we see many junk food wrappers and cans of Mello Yellow soda making the area like quite a bit like a pig sty, or if you prefer Ana Valentine’s bedroom. Get it? I called her a pig. So Zelda as you can see is obviously depressed and getting a bit pudgy around the midsection… a junk food baby. This however is the exact moment her life changes forever, when the door to her apartment is suddenly kicked in and standing there is Zelda’s life long friend… Crystal Hilton.
“Get your ass up Z! You’re getting back in the game!”
“I’m already playing Gears of War 4… I’m good.”
Crystal takes a step towards Zelda on the couch, when suddenly she stops and holds her foot in pain. Screeching out in pain for a brief second.
“God damn, what is that door made of… kryptonite?! Dammit Z, get up. I’m sick of seeing you wasting away.”
“What are you going on about Crystal?”
“Look girl… you’ve been laying here on this couch for months doing nothing. I’m tired of seeing you like this. We need to get you out, clean you up and get this shit back together.”
“And do what? Go party at some lame club? Go mini-golfing with Adam and Kelly and their stupid dumbface perfect little family? What do you want me to do Crystal? Huh?”
Crystal walks over and smacks the gaming controller out of Zelda’s hands. Zelda gets up and in Crystal’s face before Crystal backs away holding her nose and waving her hand in front of her face.
“Oh my god your breath. You need to fix this shit now Z. I'm tired of all this doing nothing by playing video games bullshit!”
“What the crap is your problem Crystal?! Don't you ever insult video games again... and do what pray tell!? You tell me what I could or should be doing right now! It’s not like I have anything to offer life… just let me sit here with my games and rot, ok?”
Crystal grabs an envelope off the table, sending several cans of soda flying in the process… but lets be honest...a few extra cans isn’t hurting the mess in the floor. She smacks Zelda in the forehead with it before waving it back and forth.
“Right here! Combat wrestling. You told me you got the letter last week inviting you to join.”
“Spike doesn’t know about my knee… I can’t...”
“Bullshit. You haven’t even tried. You’ve been moping around here and bitching about being broken for the past two years. Get your ass up and lets go… we can do this together… but first… we gots to clean you up and get you back in shape girl… because this whole Rosie O’Donnell slob thing you got going… doesn’t work for the EMF brand.”
“EMF?”
“That’s right…”
Crystal pulls out a second letter from her back pocket and holds it into the air too.
“I’m going with you.”
Fade to black.
I could start by saying some things like “who are you?” or maybe even start carrying on about “what have you done for the business” or some stupid cliche crap like that… but I’m going to spare you the same old tired trip, unlike my illustrious opponents Friday.
You see… around here… my name still carries a little weight. And part of that isn’t just because of my brother or sister-in-law. It’s because for a while i was kinda a big deal. Maybe you should go grab your phone and google me. You’ll be surprised. Or maybe not… I’m going to guess that latter since you seem to already know a good deal about me despite the fact that I simply don’t quite get who you are.
Oh sorry… that slipped.
I’ve been gone for a while… had some things I had to take care of, had some things inside of me I had to fix. I’d be lying if I said to you I thought I would be standing here today about to take part in my first every match for Combat wrestling… hell I’d be lying if I said I thought I was ever going to wrestle again. However thanks to the persistence of my best friend and tag team partner and the goading of Spike Kane who refused to give up on his courtship of me… I am here today… knee brace in hand, uneasiness in my heart and just a tad bit worried about how my body is going to hold up… but I’m here.
So let me ask you this…
You really think some n00b ass comments about me are really goin to effect me right now? Please you little goombas… i get it… I fell off the face of the Earth, but I got an extra life and I’m here now so you can stop flapping your mouth holes about where I’ve been or what I’ve been doing or even how this time has passed me by. I’m over the hill, i’m old news, I’m yesterday’s garbage… I get it… but there is something you don’t get…
I don’t care.
I don’t care about what I’m supposed to be, and that goes equally for my past reputation and my over the hill days of today. I dont’ care that I’m “the” Zelda. I don’t care that I went undefeated virtually for two years… I don’t give a Rattata’s ass. I really truly don’t. I’m not that Zelda anymore, I’m not foolish enough to believe that this sport hasn’t changed since I’ve been gone or that the competition hasn’t gotten better since I left… I’ve got a bad knee and am fighting an uphill battle right off the bat… It’s goin to be tough… but you want to know something else?
I’m ready for it.
And if you think for a second… that I am just going to be roll over in that ring because It’s beens o long, or if you think for a second that I won’t have the contra code ready to go at a moments notice.. Then good luck with your loss. Because I may not have the same moves, or the same ability… who knows what I can do, but there is something you’re not taking away from me… my desire. Crystal didn’t beat me upside the head to get me out here just for me to roll over and die like some Level 1 dungeon boss. I’ve come back to reclaim what’s mine…
How long that takes, how much I have to go through, how many twists and turns and perils I have to endure to get there… doesn’t matter. Because at the end of the day it doesn’t matter how long it took you to beat Metroid… because the ending is just a sweet no matter how much clothes Samus has on at the end.
…
Get it? That was a metaphor…. Also, like serioulsy… Why call “Metroid” a “metroidvania” game… I mean that makes no freaking since! “METROID”vania… the title is in the damn name… Metroid isn’t a freaking “metroidvania” game… it’s a Metroid game for christ sakes! How freaking stupid can you…
**static**
The scene opens back up, now sometime after our last scene. Zelda’s apartment is in much better shape… actually looks like a livable space now. The door swings open and walking in with gym bags over their shoulders is Zelda and Crystal. Zelda throws the bag in the corner by the door and heads to the kitchen for a bottle of water.
“Damn Z. You’ve been busting your ass to get back in shape. I’m pretty proud of you girl.”
“*smiles* So what are we going to do now that you finally got me off the couch and working out to get into wrestling shape again? It’s a Friday night… clubs, movies, maybe just go hang out at a party or something?”
Crystal jumps onto the couch and grabs Zelda’s game controller, turning on the TV.
“I’m thinking some video games...”
Zelda’s jaw drops open as she lifts her arms out to her sound perplexed and we fade to black for the final time.
It’s been a long time since I’ve stepped into that ring, ever since that night I blew out my knee. Has to be almost three years now… who knows… maybe they’ve already forgotten my name, maybe they’ve moved on to the latest “hot chick” to take the stage, maybe my fleeting fifteen minutes of fame are truly gone and past?
NCW seems so long ago. Seems like it’s been forever since I was that teenage girl who swept through the NCW tournament to become the first Starlet’s Champion. I never stepped foot in an IWF ring as an active competitor… I won’t go into the details of way, but considering how my career turned from that point maybe I should have. Maybe I wouldn’t have shredded everything inside my knee if I was working with safer competition… then again… Ana Valentine probably would have hired a hitman to take me out since I would have clearly been a roadblock on her path to success… or… you know what this is pointless… Everything, so they say, happens for a reason… and somehow this feels right… the right place to restart this career of mine.
We open up to a scene, one that happened a couple of months ago but for some reason was recorded. Why? Who knows… but it’s here ok? Anyway… We can see our ever charismatic heroine of these stories, Zelda Knite, laying on a couch with a video game controller in her hands. Laying in the floor in front of her and scattered around the coffee table before that we see many junk food wrappers and cans of Mello Yellow soda making the area like quite a bit like a pig sty, or if you prefer Ana Valentine’s bedroom. Get it? I called her a pig. So Zelda as you can see is obviously depressed and getting a bit pudgy around the midsection… a junk food baby. This however is the exact moment her life changes forever, when the door to her apartment is suddenly kicked in and standing there is Zelda’s life long friend… Crystal Hilton.
“Get your ass up Z! You’re getting back in the game!”
“I’m already playing Gears of War 4… I’m good.”
Crystal takes a step towards Zelda on the couch, when suddenly she stops and holds her foot in pain. Screeching out in pain for a brief second.
“God damn, what is that door made of… kryptonite?! Dammit Z, get up. I’m sick of seeing you wasting away.”
“What are you going on about Crystal?”
“Look girl… you’ve been laying here on this couch for months doing nothing. I’m tired of seeing you like this. We need to get you out, clean you up and get this shit back together.”
“And do what? Go party at some lame club? Go mini-golfing with Adam and Kelly and their stupid dumbface perfect little family? What do you want me to do Crystal? Huh?”
Crystal walks over and smacks the gaming controller out of Zelda’s hands. Zelda gets up and in Crystal’s face before Crystal backs away holding her nose and waving her hand in front of her face.
“Oh my god your breath. You need to fix this shit now Z. I'm tired of all this doing nothing by playing video games bullshit!”
“What the crap is your problem Crystal?! Don't you ever insult video games again... and do what pray tell!? You tell me what I could or should be doing right now! It’s not like I have anything to offer life… just let me sit here with my games and rot, ok?”
Crystal grabs an envelope off the table, sending several cans of soda flying in the process… but lets be honest...a few extra cans isn’t hurting the mess in the floor. She smacks Zelda in the forehead with it before waving it back and forth.
“Right here! Combat wrestling. You told me you got the letter last week inviting you to join.”
“Spike doesn’t know about my knee… I can’t...”
“Bullshit. You haven’t even tried. You’ve been moping around here and bitching about being broken for the past two years. Get your ass up and lets go… we can do this together… but first… we gots to clean you up and get you back in shape girl… because this whole Rosie O’Donnell slob thing you got going… doesn’t work for the EMF brand.”
“EMF?”
“That’s right…”
Crystal pulls out a second letter from her back pocket and holds it into the air too.
“I’m going with you.”
Fade to black.
I could start by saying some things like “who are you?” or maybe even start carrying on about “what have you done for the business” or some stupid cliche crap like that… but I’m going to spare you the same old tired trip, unlike my illustrious opponents Friday.
You see… around here… my name still carries a little weight. And part of that isn’t just because of my brother or sister-in-law. It’s because for a while i was kinda a big deal. Maybe you should go grab your phone and google me. You’ll be surprised. Or maybe not… I’m going to guess that latter since you seem to already know a good deal about me despite the fact that I simply don’t quite get who you are.
Oh sorry… that slipped.
I’ve been gone for a while… had some things I had to take care of, had some things inside of me I had to fix. I’d be lying if I said to you I thought I would be standing here today about to take part in my first every match for Combat wrestling… hell I’d be lying if I said I thought I was ever going to wrestle again. However thanks to the persistence of my best friend and tag team partner and the goading of Spike Kane who refused to give up on his courtship of me… I am here today… knee brace in hand, uneasiness in my heart and just a tad bit worried about how my body is going to hold up… but I’m here.
So let me ask you this…
You really think some n00b ass comments about me are really goin to effect me right now? Please you little goombas… i get it… I fell off the face of the Earth, but I got an extra life and I’m here now so you can stop flapping your mouth holes about where I’ve been or what I’ve been doing or even how this time has passed me by. I’m over the hill, i’m old news, I’m yesterday’s garbage… I get it… but there is something you don’t get…
I don’t care.
I don’t care about what I’m supposed to be, and that goes equally for my past reputation and my over the hill days of today. I dont’ care that I’m “the” Zelda. I don’t care that I went undefeated virtually for two years… I don’t give a Rattata’s ass. I really truly don’t. I’m not that Zelda anymore, I’m not foolish enough to believe that this sport hasn’t changed since I’ve been gone or that the competition hasn’t gotten better since I left… I’ve got a bad knee and am fighting an uphill battle right off the bat… It’s goin to be tough… but you want to know something else?
I’m ready for it.
And if you think for a second… that I am just going to be roll over in that ring because It’s beens o long, or if you think for a second that I won’t have the contra code ready to go at a moments notice.. Then good luck with your loss. Because I may not have the same moves, or the same ability… who knows what I can do, but there is something you’re not taking away from me… my desire. Crystal didn’t beat me upside the head to get me out here just for me to roll over and die like some Level 1 dungeon boss. I’ve come back to reclaim what’s mine…
How long that takes, how much I have to go through, how many twists and turns and perils I have to endure to get there… doesn’t matter. Because at the end of the day it doesn’t matter how long it took you to beat Metroid… because the ending is just a sweet no matter how much clothes Samus has on at the end.
…
Get it? That was a metaphor…. Also, like serioulsy… Why call “Metroid” a “metroidvania” game… I mean that makes no freaking since! “METROID”vania… the title is in the damn name… Metroid isn’t a freaking “metroidvania” game… it’s a Metroid game for christ sakes! How freaking stupid can you…
**static**
The scene opens back up, now sometime after our last scene. Zelda’s apartment is in much better shape… actually looks like a livable space now. The door swings open and walking in with gym bags over their shoulders is Zelda and Crystal. Zelda throws the bag in the corner by the door and heads to the kitchen for a bottle of water.
“Damn Z. You’ve been busting your ass to get back in shape. I’m pretty proud of you girl.”
“*smiles* So what are we going to do now that you finally got me off the couch and working out to get into wrestling shape again? It’s a Friday night… clubs, movies, maybe just go hang out at a party or something?”
Crystal jumps onto the couch and grabs Zelda’s game controller, turning on the TV.
“I’m thinking some video games...”
Zelda’s jaw drops open as she lifts her arms out to her sound perplexed and we fade to black for the final time.
