..::Official AWA Press Conference / 03/25/18::..
Mar 25, 2018 9:34:12 GMT -5
Kira Izumi, Mav., and 1 more like this
Post by The King on Mar 25, 2018 9:34:12 GMT -5
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Production Member: Action!
We cut open to the Mouth of the South, Jimmy Hart, and infamous boxing promoter, Don King, as they sit upon a long mahogany table, a massive AWA logo dangling from the roof behind them. The lights are purple and blue, with a real 80s aesthetic filling the room. The screen quality is something you'd expect from an old VHS tape, it crackles and glitches every now and then, giving it a real old school vibe. Upon both men's faces are big, cheesy grins, the likes of which they are notorious for. They both wear their infamous vibrant, dazzling and colorful suits, which gleam under the lights. Positioned in front of King, on the desk, are two American flags, and in front of Hart, his megaphone.
Jimmy Hart: I am the Mouth of the South, Jimmy' Harrrrt! Alongside me, the oh so notorious, Donnnn Kinnng!
Don King: Welcome to the official, AWA Press Conference! I'm Don Ki-
Jimmy Hart: I already' announced your name, King. Wake up.
Don King: You did?
Jimmy Hart: Yea dude, we went over this before we started rollin', I introduce the names, then you introduced what we were doin'!
Don King: But I did introduce what we were doing?
Jimmy Hart: And then you introduced your name! Which I was meant to do!
Don King: But you did introduce my name?
Jimmy Hart: Forget it! Welcome to the first ever, official, AWA Press Conferen-
Don King: I already announced that, Hart! Wake up!
Jimmy Hart: I know you already announced it, King! But I decided to do it better than you originally did! You wake up!
Don King: Oh so you think you're better than me now then, huh?!
Jimmy Hart: And what if I do? Mr. Billionaire?
Don King: Oh so that's an insult now? Mr. Saggy-tits?!
Jimmy Hart: WOAH! You do not go offending my man pecks like that! Mr.-I'm-a-billionaire-yet-I'm-only-willing-to-spend-one-hundred-thousand-on-this-fed-because-I'm-an-uptight-stingy-bastard!
Don King: And what about it? It's my money, I decide what I do with i-
Production Member: Did we just play the wrong tape?
We cut open to the Mouth of the South, Jimmy Hart, and infamous boxing promoter, Don King, as they sit upon a long mahogany table, a massive AWA logo dangling from the roof behind them. The lights are purple and blue, with a real 80s aesthetic filling the room. The screen quality is something you'd expect from an old VHS tape, it crackles and glitches every now and then, giving it a real old school vibe. Upon both men's faces are big, cheesy grins, even bigger than their last ones. They both wear their infamous vibrant, dazzling and colorful suits, which gleam under the lights. Positioned in front of King, on the desk, are two American flags, and in front of Hart, his megaphone, and a bottle of water.
Jimmy Hart: I am the Mouth of the South, Jimmy' Harrrrt! Alongside me, the oh so notorious, Donnnn Kinnng!
Don King: Welcome to the official, AWA Press Conference!
Jimmy Hart: You actually did it ri-
Don King: -During tonight's Press Conference, we will be talking about the goals and ambitions of the Absolute Wrestling Alliance, how I- we- will finance the shows, and the official tour dates for the first set of events leading up to our grand super-show at the end of the month!
Jimmy Hart: That's right, King! I- I can't believe you got most of that right.
Don King: What do you mean, you can't believe it? I've been doing this for thousands of yea-.
Jimmy Hart: -Talking of our grand super-show, I think it's time to officially announce it! That's right, May the 6th, taped live only for the XHF Network... AWA presents...
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The official AWA Absolution logo appears on screen, the official theme song for it, Phil Collins - In The Air Tonight, plays softly in the background as a hype package is played for it. We cut back to Don King and Jimmy Hart, still at the table.
Don King: But how do we get to AWA Absolution? We go through the WEEKLY EXTRAVAGANZA!
Jimmy Hart: Taped and shown live every Saturday on the XHF Network, Absolute Wrestling Alliance will present to you our first XHF TV show, AWA Weekly Extravaganza, featuring all of AWA's top superstars!
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Don King: The first official card for the event will go live when we gain our first six superstars!
Jimmy Hart: And I can officially confirm we already have our first three! The Warrior of Space and Time... Hailing from...... THE FUTURE... Nano-Tron! He'll be the first in our extravagant cruiserweight division!
Don King: From the Future, you say?! Oh my!
Jimmy Hart: Then, joining the AWA Heavyweight Division... Will be Bjark the Assassin, he killed his brother and is now under the influence of the evil, Macabre!
Don King: H- He killed his BROTHER?!
Jimmy Hart: And last but not least... The Strongman... Weighing in at 6"3' and 332lbs... Daruun Micheal!
Don King: Strongman? Ooooh.
Jimmy Hart: I can also confirm that later today we will have a new addition to the cruiserweight division, but more info on that is to be revealed soon!
Don King: What a great start to the initial roster then, eh Hart?
Jimmy Hart: The contracts are rolling out! But, uh, maybe we'd be able to hire even bigger stars if you actually put some more money towards it-
Don King: Oh give it a rest! You skinny piece of sh-
Production Member: Cut!
We cut back to Jimmy Hart and Don King at the mahogany desk, big smiles planted upon their faces.
Don King: Now we have officially announced the shows, let's announce the AWA Staff!
Jimmy Hart: The Absolute Wrestling Alliance will be commissioned by my co-host, Don King, who will also finance the company. I'll be working as a color commentator alongside the debuting, Stan Anderson!
Don King: So that makes me the owner right?
Jimmy Hart: N- no. I- I came up with idea alongside you, we both run it together.
Don King: But I'm financing it?
Jimmy Hart: Well I own the trademarks!
Don King: You do?-
Jimmy Hart: -WE will also have joining the staff team, 50 year old, 'Honest' Al, who will be working as our on-air journalist, interviewing the wrestlers in the ring and backstage!
Don King: He's a great friend of mine, quite an honest and humble man if you were to ask me!
Jimmy Hart: You're so funny.
Don King: Than- You're not being serious are you?-
Jimmy Hart: -And last but not least, our senior referee... Billy Bean!
Don King: What a name! Almost as good as min-
Jimmy Hart: Everything has to be about you, doesn't it?
Don King: What?! And you don't try making the focus on you?!
Jimmy Hart: I don't need to I'm Jimmy [BEEPING] Hart!
Don King: WOAH! DID YOU JUST SAY THE F WORD?!
Jimmy Hart: Who knows, it was bleeped out.
Don King: Oh? Well your a [BEEPER]
Jimmy Hart: Yea? And you're a [BE-
Production Member: Right, that's it. CUT!