Good Morning! (Xtraction BM RP #1, [tee hee, BM])
May 29, 2018 21:13:25 GMT -5
ForeverKuroi, Hyperion, and 2 more like this
Post by Curtis D. Kanyon on May 29, 2018 21:13:25 GMT -5
**Fade in. Casa de Kanyon 3.0. Front Lawn. Dawn.**
*We see Curtis Kanyon in his morning robe, going out the front door to pick up his newspaper. He looks up to see the camera.*
Curtis: Good Morning! Ah yes, welcome. A bit early I see? Yes, I am picking up the paper, and yes I have people who could do that for me, but they don’t. I prefer to get my own. Sorry you didn’t see me at the latest Anonymous TV. I was on lock down. “Someone” …who I am nearly sure I know who… called in a bomb threat that got me stuck in a bunker for a week. Otherwise, that X*Crown would be mine right now. It should be. Fuckin’ hell.
*Curtis stands up straight and looks at the paper. He flips through some pages.*
Curtis: Dow is up… Korea still sucks… Aw, the local dog kennel is doing a charity…
*Curtis lowers the paper and looks at the camera.*
Curtis: Oh, still here? Fine. C’mon.
*Curtis folds up the paper and puts it under an arm. He then turns to head into the White House and the camera follows.*
Curtis: So I assume you’re here for Xtraction? The powers that be, or one power, or something. I don’t know what V is, but he wanted me on the team. Now, he didn’t say it out-right, but it’s obvious. I beat Anomoly, I beat Price, I don’t even know the other two. On top of that, I’m the President, so obviously I’m the leader! And considering I lead a five man team to victory in TGK, it only makes sense. I will carry that paper champion Anomoly, that painted up weirdo, and the crotchety old man with the nice hair to a victory. Not “Price,” fuck that guy. I will make sure he’s eliminated, get my wig back, and keep the other jabrons on my team safe. Because I’m a president, that’s what I do. Make strategy, figure out the allowable collateral damage, and win!
*Curtis has made his way down a hall and now enters the White House kitchen. Professional chefs are hard at work preparing the day’s breakfast. Curtis grabs a biscuit off the cooling rack. Takes a bite. It’s delicious.*
Curtis: Now don’t get me wrong, I don’t need to win this match. I don’t need the money. I have no love for the Brits personally. Professionally sure, for UN things. I have a briefcase, I should be chillin’ and waitin’, But I don’t want to sit on the side lines. Thor would not want me to sit back while others battle. Naw, fuck that noise, I love to battle. I love the war. Five of the biggest and brightest verses five of the best that stupid stinky Ohio has to offer will be a war, make no mistake.
*Curtis takes another bite of his biscuit.*
Curtis: Mmmff gah fffeffuh—
Esmerelda: Curtis! No talking with your mouth full!
*We see Esmerelda and the children, Pablo and Pepito, sitting at the table eating breakfast. Pepito playing with his Goldbear II action figure, using it to stomp a mudhole in his Copycat action figure. Pablo being nearly an adult has headphones on and cares not for whatever is happening around him. Curtis takes a big gulp.*
Curtis: Sorry dear.
Esmerelda: don't be a bad influence on the children.
Pepito: Papa! Will you be facing Goldbear II again?
Curtis: Ugh...no son, not this time. I think he's scared of me.
Pepito: Ha ha, you're funny, Goldbear II is scared of no man.
Curtis: ...sure. But I am facing a bunch of guys from AWF. Like my sweet sweet Jackson Steele. Oh man, he's so great. A fantastic warrior and a cash cow for advertising. I mean, outside of AWF, he also did amazing work in the p--
*Curtis stood talking as Esmeralda stared daggers at him. Making him realize to stop talking about Steele's other work in front of the children. However, Pablo is finally interested.*
Pablo: Maybe we can accompany you to your match this time dad!
Curtis: Exxxstacy will not be there.
Pablo: Oh. Never mind.
*He puts his headphones back on and his mother smacks him in the shoulder.*
Curtis: Then there's Micheal Storm, that filthy ni--
Esmerelda: Curtis!
Curtis: What?
Esmerelda: You can't say that! Not in front of the kids, and especially as president.
Curtis: I can't say nincompoop?
Esmerelda: Oh...yes.
Pepito: What were you thinking he was gonna say mama?
Esmerelda: None of your business, eat your breakfast.
Curtis: Storm is a filthy nincompoop. He caused me to be eliminated from the Rumble! I owe him a receipt. Also, he keeps showing up in these multi man matches with me. It's getting tiresome. So it might be time to put him out to pasture.
*Curtis finishes his biscuit.*
Curtis: Then there's Randy Angel. A fun guy to drink with. But no real threat in the ring. I'll try to make his pain short and sweet so we can hit the bar afterward. Man, this one time, Randy and I, we got so waisted...
*Esmerelda stares daggers again.*
Curtis: ...on chocolate ice cream... that we... you know what, with the kids here, I can't tell any good stories. I'm sorry XHF universe, but you can fill in the blanks. Then Damien Young, my homie from TGK. He's really making a name for himself in that low rent place, AWF. But I expected nothing less from him. He's a big personality in a small pond. I led him to victory before. But he knows me, I'm a big personality in an ocean. I thrive on the grand stage, which this will be. And as much as I like Young, I know he's not ready for this. But what can I do. The world will see his potential, but he will still fall to my might.
*The chef brings Curtis an omelette for his breakfast dinner.*
Curtis: Thanks Jeeves.
Chef: I keep telling you, my name is Henry.
Curtis: Okay. Sorry camera crew, you'll need to take a break. But since I got one left, let me talk about this Seth Dongler fellow. I don't know him. Like, at all. Is he the guy that loves to count to 10 or something? Idunno. Maybe he's good, maybe he sucks. But obvs he has the most to prove in this match, but with a name like Seth, he's got to be the type who cracks under pressure. And that will be his downfall. Ain’t that right Paul Smackage?
*Curtis looks off screen. The camera pans past the table, but nothing. It then moves downward to see Paul on all fours, eating his breakfast out of a doggie bowl. His mask just barely lifted above his mouth. He looks up and nods.*
Esmerelda: I don’t understand why he won’t eat at the table?
Curtis: It is just his way dear. Leave him be.
Esmerelda: Why do you even still employ him?
Curtis: Because I have a briefcase that will mean I will need use of his title carrying abilities again soon. Also, it helps keep the unemployment number down.
**Fade out.
Fade in. Interrogation room. [Classified location. Classified time.]**
*We see Jake and Lucifer talking on the confidential side of the interrogation room, as we see Not Anomoly’s Twin on the other side of the glass, sipping on a juice box.*
: That man is just disturbing.
: …
: Aw man, don’t tell me your still upset about your show?
: Of course you’re not upset! You got picked up by another network! This is the only job I have right now.
: Crazy, since we haven’t even gotten paid for doing this yet.
: I know, I just have to hope—
*Curtis walks in.*
Curtis: All right guys! Ready to do this!?
: Oh hey, I was just talking to Jake about pay—
Curtis: Not now cancelled loser, let’s get this interrogation underway!
*Curtis pushes his way into the interrogation room.*
: That was…that was cold blooded.
: I am dejected…
*Moving into the other room.*
Curtis: You son of a bitch!
: How did you know my mother was a dog?
Curtis: I could see the resemblance.
: I won’t talk, so just go ahead and murder me!
Curtis: Not happening, this isn’t TGK.
*Jake and Lucifer walk in. Jake grabs a chair and turns it backward, then sits down. Lucifer just looks on with sadness in his eyes.*
: We about to take you to good cop, bad cop, sad cop town!
*Will the President find out any information on his villainous assassinator? Will Lucifer find a new show to work on? Will Brooklyn 99 be the same on NBC? Will Paul Smackage ever find true love? All this and more next week, same Bat-time, same Bat-channel!*
Curtis: Next week? V will kill me if I don’t make deadline!
*Okay, maybe in two or three days.*
**To be continued…**
*We see Curtis Kanyon in his morning robe, going out the front door to pick up his newspaper. He looks up to see the camera.*
Curtis: Good Morning! Ah yes, welcome. A bit early I see? Yes, I am picking up the paper, and yes I have people who could do that for me, but they don’t. I prefer to get my own. Sorry you didn’t see me at the latest Anonymous TV. I was on lock down. “Someone” …who I am nearly sure I know who… called in a bomb threat that got me stuck in a bunker for a week. Otherwise, that X*Crown would be mine right now. It should be. Fuckin’ hell.
*Curtis stands up straight and looks at the paper. He flips through some pages.*
Curtis: Dow is up… Korea still sucks… Aw, the local dog kennel is doing a charity…
*Curtis lowers the paper and looks at the camera.*
Curtis: Oh, still here? Fine. C’mon.
*Curtis folds up the paper and puts it under an arm. He then turns to head into the White House and the camera follows.*
Curtis: So I assume you’re here for Xtraction? The powers that be, or one power, or something. I don’t know what V is, but he wanted me on the team. Now, he didn’t say it out-right, but it’s obvious. I beat Anomoly, I beat Price, I don’t even know the other two. On top of that, I’m the President, so obviously I’m the leader! And considering I lead a five man team to victory in TGK, it only makes sense. I will carry that paper champion Anomoly, that painted up weirdo, and the crotchety old man with the nice hair to a victory. Not “Price,” fuck that guy. I will make sure he’s eliminated, get my wig back, and keep the other jabrons on my team safe. Because I’m a president, that’s what I do. Make strategy, figure out the allowable collateral damage, and win!
*Curtis has made his way down a hall and now enters the White House kitchen. Professional chefs are hard at work preparing the day’s breakfast. Curtis grabs a biscuit off the cooling rack. Takes a bite. It’s delicious.*
Curtis: Now don’t get me wrong, I don’t need to win this match. I don’t need the money. I have no love for the Brits personally. Professionally sure, for UN things. I have a briefcase, I should be chillin’ and waitin’, But I don’t want to sit on the side lines. Thor would not want me to sit back while others battle. Naw, fuck that noise, I love to battle. I love the war. Five of the biggest and brightest verses five of the best that stupid stinky Ohio has to offer will be a war, make no mistake.
*Curtis takes another bite of his biscuit.*
Curtis: Mmmff gah fffeffuh—
Esmerelda: Curtis! No talking with your mouth full!
*We see Esmerelda and the children, Pablo and Pepito, sitting at the table eating breakfast. Pepito playing with his Goldbear II action figure, using it to stomp a mudhole in his Copycat action figure. Pablo being nearly an adult has headphones on and cares not for whatever is happening around him. Curtis takes a big gulp.*
Curtis: Sorry dear.
Esmerelda: don't be a bad influence on the children.
Pepito: Papa! Will you be facing Goldbear II again?
Curtis: Ugh...no son, not this time. I think he's scared of me.
Pepito: Ha ha, you're funny, Goldbear II is scared of no man.
Curtis: ...sure. But I am facing a bunch of guys from AWF. Like my sweet sweet Jackson Steele. Oh man, he's so great. A fantastic warrior and a cash cow for advertising. I mean, outside of AWF, he also did amazing work in the p--
*Curtis stood talking as Esmeralda stared daggers at him. Making him realize to stop talking about Steele's other work in front of the children. However, Pablo is finally interested.*
Pablo: Maybe we can accompany you to your match this time dad!
Curtis: Exxxstacy will not be there.
Pablo: Oh. Never mind.
*He puts his headphones back on and his mother smacks him in the shoulder.*
Curtis: Then there's Micheal Storm, that filthy ni--
Esmerelda: Curtis!
Curtis: What?
Esmerelda: You can't say that! Not in front of the kids, and especially as president.
Curtis: I can't say nincompoop?
Esmerelda: Oh...yes.
Pepito: What were you thinking he was gonna say mama?
Esmerelda: None of your business, eat your breakfast.
Curtis: Storm is a filthy nincompoop. He caused me to be eliminated from the Rumble! I owe him a receipt. Also, he keeps showing up in these multi man matches with me. It's getting tiresome. So it might be time to put him out to pasture.
*Curtis finishes his biscuit.*
Curtis: Then there's Randy Angel. A fun guy to drink with. But no real threat in the ring. I'll try to make his pain short and sweet so we can hit the bar afterward. Man, this one time, Randy and I, we got so waisted...
*Esmerelda stares daggers again.*
Curtis: ...on chocolate ice cream... that we... you know what, with the kids here, I can't tell any good stories. I'm sorry XHF universe, but you can fill in the blanks. Then Damien Young, my homie from TGK. He's really making a name for himself in that low rent place, AWF. But I expected nothing less from him. He's a big personality in a small pond. I led him to victory before. But he knows me, I'm a big personality in an ocean. I thrive on the grand stage, which this will be. And as much as I like Young, I know he's not ready for this. But what can I do. The world will see his potential, but he will still fall to my might.
*The chef brings Curtis an omelette for his breakfast dinner.*
Curtis: Thanks Jeeves.
Chef: I keep telling you, my name is Henry.
Curtis: Okay. Sorry camera crew, you'll need to take a break. But since I got one left, let me talk about this Seth Dongler fellow. I don't know him. Like, at all. Is he the guy that loves to count to 10 or something? Idunno. Maybe he's good, maybe he sucks. But obvs he has the most to prove in this match, but with a name like Seth, he's got to be the type who cracks under pressure. And that will be his downfall. Ain’t that right Paul Smackage?
*Curtis looks off screen. The camera pans past the table, but nothing. It then moves downward to see Paul on all fours, eating his breakfast out of a doggie bowl. His mask just barely lifted above his mouth. He looks up and nods.*
Esmerelda: I don’t understand why he won’t eat at the table?
Curtis: It is just his way dear. Leave him be.
Esmerelda: Why do you even still employ him?
Curtis: Because I have a briefcase that will mean I will need use of his title carrying abilities again soon. Also, it helps keep the unemployment number down.
**Fade out.
Fade in. Interrogation room. [Classified location. Classified time.]**
*We see Jake and Lucifer talking on the confidential side of the interrogation room, as we see Not Anomoly’s Twin on the other side of the glass, sipping on a juice box.*
: That man is just disturbing.: …: Aw man, don’t tell me your still upset about your show?: Of course you’re not upset! You got picked up by another network! This is the only job I have right now.: Crazy, since we haven’t even gotten paid for doing this yet.: I know, I just have to hope—*Curtis walks in.*
Curtis: All right guys! Ready to do this!?
: Oh hey, I was just talking to Jake about pay—Curtis: Not now cancelled loser, let’s get this interrogation underway!
*Curtis pushes his way into the interrogation room.*
: That was…that was cold blooded.: I am dejected…*Moving into the other room.*
Curtis: You son of a bitch!
: How did you know my mother was a dog?Curtis: I could see the resemblance.
: I won’t talk, so just go ahead and murder me!Curtis: Not happening, this isn’t TGK.
*Jake and Lucifer walk in. Jake grabs a chair and turns it backward, then sits down. Lucifer just looks on with sadness in his eyes.*
: We about to take you to good cop, bad cop, sad cop town!*Will the President find out any information on his villainous assassinator? Will Lucifer find a new show to work on? Will Brooklyn 99 be the same on NBC? Will Paul Smackage ever find true love? All this and more next week, same Bat-time, same Bat-channel!*
Curtis: Next week? V will kill me if I don’t make deadline!
*Okay, maybe in two or three days.*
**To be continued…**
