Flacid Air Bag (XHF Iron Week, Tag Annihilator RP)
Oct 26, 2018 21:27:09 GMT -5
ForeverKuroi likes this
Post by Dylan on Oct 26, 2018 21:27:09 GMT -5
We open to the Viper household, where Jeffrey is stomping about screaming about his silly video game he'd gotten from a Redbox, the one that had a paper disc. Inside Dylan's room, he giggles, as he was the mastermind who'd pulled off that elaborate stunt. Now he was the owner of a copy of Marvel's Spider-Man, an action-adventure game developed by Insomniac Games and published by Sony Interactive Entertainment for the PlayStation 4, based on the Marvel Comics superhero Spider-Man. Dylan shakes his head at the cheap plug, and Jeffrey kicks the door to Dylan's room in.
Jeffrey Viper: DYLAN! I STILL CANNOT BELIEVE THIS! WHO COULD HAVE PULLED OFF SUCH A GAG ON THE KING OF THE XHF! THE GUY WHO MIGHT BE REALER A KING THAN THE KING OF SUPREMIA!
Dylan snickers, and slips the disc into a case and into a drawer by his desk.
Dylan Viper: I've no fucking clue, Viper. Can you stop showing up unannounced? This is the second time in an hour you've kicked my door in. I WAS IN THE MIDDLE OF FUCKING MY GIRLFRIEND, DAMMIT!
Jeffrey Viper: The only thing you'll be fucking is a Nihilist in a potato sack on Sunday!
Dylan Viper: ...what the fuck is wrong with you?
*Jeffrey laughs a belly shaking laugh; like literally, his stomach jiggles like there's an earthquake inside of his stomach. He quickly stops, and darts to Dylan's bedside table.
Dylan Viper: HEY! WHAT THE FUCK? GET THE FUCK OUT OF THERE!
Jeffrey retreats, an angry look on his face and a red cloth in his hand. He unveils it as a mask.
Jeffrey Viper: What the hell, Dylan? You didn't tell me you were that Anal Molly guy!
Dylan stares at Jeffrey, a bit dumbfounded as he shakes his head.
Dylan Viper: Imbecile. That's not an Anomoly mask! His masks clearly is a full mask, and as you can see, that only covers half of one's face.
Jeffrey gasps.
Jeffrey Viper: Say it isn't so! Are you... are you a part of the Nihilists? Are you secretly going to turn on me and cost us the Tag Team Annihilator?!
Dylan groans and puts his head in his hands.
Dylan Viper: No, no. We've come too far to turn back now. And there's only two of them. Besides, that mask...
He rips the mask from Jeffrey.
Dylan Viper: ...is a memento from my fallen partner, Dexter Point.
Jeffrey Viper: Isn't he that Bullseye guy in the new season of Daredevil?
Dylan Viper: Shut up. You're gonna piss off Scorps by reciting incorrect knowledge about his favorite Netflix show.
Jeffrey Viper: I thought his favorite show was Pokemon Go?
Dylan Viper: ...
Jeffrey Viper: ...
Dylan Viper: Get the fuck out.
Dylan quite literally kicks Jeffrey out of his room, slamming and locking the door behind him. He turns around, tossing the infamous Crimson Dragon mask on his bedside table, where it lands neatly on a box of Mongo Condoms; So Amazing, It Doesn't Need a Tagline. He lays back on the bed, hands behind his head.
Dylan Viper: How on earth am I going to win the Annihilator when my partner is literally a flacid bag of air obsessed with my mom?
The scene fades to black, but alas! This video is not over!
The scene begins on a black screen, a faint "XHF Network" logo gracing the bottom right corner. One could assume this was a faulty feed. They could also assume this was copyright infringement upon one's promo style. A chuckle is heard. Some creaking. A crash.
Mystery: "Nihilism." The rejection of all moral principles, in belief that all life is meaningless.
A few flashes of light, depicting Dylan in various stages of his career, obviously kicking ass because he's a badass and thus must be showcased as such.
Mystery: One could say I was at one point, a believer of nihilism. I was a member of XHF's "Tag Team of the Year," with a man equally as nihilistic as myself.
More flashes, depicting the hardcore style of wrestling The Darkness embraced, the style that nearly got them the XHF Tag Team Championships, twice.
Mystery: With this nihilist at my side, we dominated the FWA Tag Team division. Everyone we stepped up against, we cut them down like scythes cutting down grain.
A wide shot of a scythe cutting down people, people being sliced in half by the curved blade, handled by the Grim Reaper.
--
The mystery man snaps his fingers, and a flame appears from his fingertips. Because he's holding a lighter, obviously. From the Darkness, the shadows, steps Dylan Viper. No, steps Dylan Black. A scar gracing his right eye. He chuckles, and observes the light protruding from his phalanges.
Dylan Viper: It's really quite intriguing, how light can pierce the veil of darkness. You see, "Darkness," it's an illusion. It's a shroud of mystery that when presented upon oneself, you can simply reach through it and discover it's a hoax. It's a false sense of security. The Darkness... it's a lie!
Dylan takes the flame and throws it up, where it hits a lantern swinging from the ceiling. The room combusts with light and life, and the darkness that enveloped Dylan fades away, being replaced by a new, lively Dylan. Dylan Viper.
Dylan Viper: The Nihilists wish to question why I cast aside the Dylan Black persona. The Dylan Black who was King of Darkness, Emperor of FWA, the gatekeeper of the (F)RWA Tag Team "Division," and I use the term division loosely because it was nowhere near a division. They question why I would waste away what could have been great glories. Why I recycled the identity of the man who I had built my legacy on. The answer, Edmund and Green Giant, is simple.
Dylan Viper: Because the Darkness needed me, but I didn't need the Darkness.
Dylan scoffs, and paces around his little room he's in. It's a relatively small room, about 100 square feet. It's all painted one solid, slate color. Dylan turns back to the camera, a slight smirk upon the edges of his lips.
Dylan Viper: Throughout the tenure of the Darkness, who was the breakout star, who earned THREE (F)RWA World Championship matches? Me. Who was the one who successfully defended the tag titles? Me. WHO WAS THE ONE WHO DOMINATED FORMER CHAMPIONS WHILE THE OTHER FLOUNDERED, BARELY ABLE TO DEFEAT SOME HILLBILLY PRICK? ME!
Dylan lashes out, swinging a punch and connecting with the lantern. It shatters, and sends the room back into darkness. Dylan produces a flashlight, and illuminates the room.
Dylan Viper: While I carried Dackle for months, I came to realise. Maybe, just maybe, this whole "Darkness" schtick, was a hoax. Dackle, he used me to elevate himself. So when he got reincarcerated to that mental asylum, it was almost like an anchor that held me down, was FINALLY releasing me!
He laughs, licking the edges of his mouth with a darting tongue.
Dylan Viper: Nihilists... you fancy yourselves on this aura you produce, this distinction of fear, of intimidation. You pride yourselves on this bit of being undefeated, ask Anomoly what happened to his streak! Ask Dreadvan, ask Lethe. They all, fall, down...
He takes a slow, deep breath.
Dylan Viper: Ring a ring o'roses, a pocketful of posies... ashes to ashes, they all fall down.
Dylan begins to chuckle, quietly at first, but advancing to a devious cackle.
Dylan Viper: Nihilists, you're nothing but posers! You know not what real competition is like, not until you face me in battle! Me, the best bout machine! The match of the year factory! There's a real reason why I'm called these names, and no it's not because I bear resemblance to some "Kenny Omega." No, because I'm pound-for-pound one of the best competitors in this industry! I am bound by nothing, not the darkness nor the Vipers, and especially not fear! Fear, it's useless and temporary. My glory, when I win this match and then beat the Icons, or the Guns, I don't give a damn which, it'll last forever. I will kill your legacy you claim to leave behind, and build a throne from your bones from which I shall observe the Tag Team division. Determine who's truly worthy of a match with me!
Dylan takes a quick breath.
Dylan Viper: I mustn't drag on too long, I may begin to sound like two generic luchadors who like to meditate in the darkness surrounded by candles. How could I look up to the two of you when I'm taller than you both?
He sneers at the camera.
Dylan Viper: Esbin and Gemur, upon End of Days, you'll look up at Team Viper, as we've stuffed you both in potato sacks, and wonder where it all went wrong. The poison of the Vipers will put the fear of a god in the non-believers. And that god, is Dylan Viper.
Fin.
Jeffrey Viper: DYLAN! I STILL CANNOT BELIEVE THIS! WHO COULD HAVE PULLED OFF SUCH A GAG ON THE KING OF THE XHF! THE GUY WHO MIGHT BE REALER A KING THAN THE KING OF SUPREMIA!
Dylan snickers, and slips the disc into a case and into a drawer by his desk.
Dylan Viper: I've no fucking clue, Viper. Can you stop showing up unannounced? This is the second time in an hour you've kicked my door in. I WAS IN THE MIDDLE OF FUCKING MY GIRLFRIEND, DAMMIT!
Jeffrey Viper: The only thing you'll be fucking is a Nihilist in a potato sack on Sunday!
Dylan Viper: ...what the fuck is wrong with you?
*Jeffrey laughs a belly shaking laugh; like literally, his stomach jiggles like there's an earthquake inside of his stomach. He quickly stops, and darts to Dylan's bedside table.
Dylan Viper: HEY! WHAT THE FUCK? GET THE FUCK OUT OF THERE!
Jeffrey retreats, an angry look on his face and a red cloth in his hand. He unveils it as a mask.
Jeffrey Viper: What the hell, Dylan? You didn't tell me you were that Anal Molly guy!
Dylan stares at Jeffrey, a bit dumbfounded as he shakes his head.
Dylan Viper: Imbecile. That's not an Anomoly mask! His masks clearly is a full mask, and as you can see, that only covers half of one's face.
Jeffrey gasps.
Jeffrey Viper: Say it isn't so! Are you... are you a part of the Nihilists? Are you secretly going to turn on me and cost us the Tag Team Annihilator?!
Dylan groans and puts his head in his hands.
Dylan Viper: No, no. We've come too far to turn back now. And there's only two of them. Besides, that mask...
He rips the mask from Jeffrey.
Dylan Viper: ...is a memento from my fallen partner, Dexter Point.
Jeffrey Viper: Isn't he that Bullseye guy in the new season of Daredevil?
Dylan Viper: Shut up. You're gonna piss off Scorps by reciting incorrect knowledge about his favorite Netflix show.
Jeffrey Viper: I thought his favorite show was Pokemon Go?
Dylan Viper: ...
Jeffrey Viper: ...
Dylan Viper: Get the fuck out.
Dylan quite literally kicks Jeffrey out of his room, slamming and locking the door behind him. He turns around, tossing the infamous Crimson Dragon mask on his bedside table, where it lands neatly on a box of Mongo Condoms; So Amazing, It Doesn't Need a Tagline. He lays back on the bed, hands behind his head.
Dylan Viper: How on earth am I going to win the Annihilator when my partner is literally a flacid bag of air obsessed with my mom?
The scene fades to black, but alas! This video is not over!
BATMAN SEGUE WITH DYLAN'S FACE
The scene begins on a black screen, a faint "XHF Network" logo gracing the bottom right corner. One could assume this was a faulty feed. They could also assume this was copyright infringement upon one's promo style. A chuckle is heard. Some creaking. A crash.
Mystery: "Nihilism." The rejection of all moral principles, in belief that all life is meaningless.
A few flashes of light, depicting Dylan in various stages of his career, obviously kicking ass because he's a badass and thus must be showcased as such.
Mystery: One could say I was at one point, a believer of nihilism. I was a member of XHF's "Tag Team of the Year," with a man equally as nihilistic as myself.
More flashes, depicting the hardcore style of wrestling The Darkness embraced, the style that nearly got them the XHF Tag Team Championships, twice.
Mystery: With this nihilist at my side, we dominated the FWA Tag Team division. Everyone we stepped up against, we cut them down like scythes cutting down grain.
A wide shot of a scythe cutting down people, people being sliced in half by the curved blade, handled by the Grim Reaper.
--
The mystery man snaps his fingers, and a flame appears from his fingertips. Because he's holding a lighter, obviously. From the Darkness, the shadows, steps Dylan Viper. No, steps Dylan Black. A scar gracing his right eye. He chuckles, and observes the light protruding from his phalanges.
Dylan Viper: It's really quite intriguing, how light can pierce the veil of darkness. You see, "Darkness," it's an illusion. It's a shroud of mystery that when presented upon oneself, you can simply reach through it and discover it's a hoax. It's a false sense of security. The Darkness... it's a lie!
Dylan takes the flame and throws it up, where it hits a lantern swinging from the ceiling. The room combusts with light and life, and the darkness that enveloped Dylan fades away, being replaced by a new, lively Dylan. Dylan Viper.
Dylan Viper: The Nihilists wish to question why I cast aside the Dylan Black persona. The Dylan Black who was King of Darkness, Emperor of FWA, the gatekeeper of the (F)RWA Tag Team "Division," and I use the term division loosely because it was nowhere near a division. They question why I would waste away what could have been great glories. Why I recycled the identity of the man who I had built my legacy on. The answer, Edmund and Green Giant, is simple.
Dylan Viper: Because the Darkness needed me, but I didn't need the Darkness.
Dylan scoffs, and paces around his little room he's in. It's a relatively small room, about 100 square feet. It's all painted one solid, slate color. Dylan turns back to the camera, a slight smirk upon the edges of his lips.
Dylan Viper: Throughout the tenure of the Darkness, who was the breakout star, who earned THREE (F)RWA World Championship matches? Me. Who was the one who successfully defended the tag titles? Me. WHO WAS THE ONE WHO DOMINATED FORMER CHAMPIONS WHILE THE OTHER FLOUNDERED, BARELY ABLE TO DEFEAT SOME HILLBILLY PRICK? ME!
Dylan lashes out, swinging a punch and connecting with the lantern. It shatters, and sends the room back into darkness. Dylan produces a flashlight, and illuminates the room.
Dylan Viper: While I carried Dackle for months, I came to realise. Maybe, just maybe, this whole "Darkness" schtick, was a hoax. Dackle, he used me to elevate himself. So when he got reincarcerated to that mental asylum, it was almost like an anchor that held me down, was FINALLY releasing me!
He laughs, licking the edges of his mouth with a darting tongue.
Dylan Viper: Nihilists... you fancy yourselves on this aura you produce, this distinction of fear, of intimidation. You pride yourselves on this bit of being undefeated, ask Anomoly what happened to his streak! Ask Dreadvan, ask Lethe. They all, fall, down...
He takes a slow, deep breath.
Dylan Viper: Ring a ring o'roses, a pocketful of posies... ashes to ashes, they all fall down.
Dylan begins to chuckle, quietly at first, but advancing to a devious cackle.
Dylan Viper: Nihilists, you're nothing but posers! You know not what real competition is like, not until you face me in battle! Me, the best bout machine! The match of the year factory! There's a real reason why I'm called these names, and no it's not because I bear resemblance to some "Kenny Omega." No, because I'm pound-for-pound one of the best competitors in this industry! I am bound by nothing, not the darkness nor the Vipers, and especially not fear! Fear, it's useless and temporary. My glory, when I win this match and then beat the Icons, or the Guns, I don't give a damn which, it'll last forever. I will kill your legacy you claim to leave behind, and build a throne from your bones from which I shall observe the Tag Team division. Determine who's truly worthy of a match with me!
Dylan takes a quick breath.
Dylan Viper: I mustn't drag on too long, I may begin to sound like two generic luchadors who like to meditate in the darkness surrounded by candles. How could I look up to the two of you when I'm taller than you both?
He sneers at the camera.
Dylan Viper: Esbin and Gemur, upon End of Days, you'll look up at Team Viper, as we've stuffed you both in potato sacks, and wonder where it all went wrong. The poison of the Vipers will put the fear of a god in the non-believers. And that god, is Dylan Viper.
Fin.
